


Lifeline: St. Petersburg (Part 3)

by Denrhea



Series: Lifeline [3]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Anxiety Disorder, Depression, Fluff and Smut, High Heels, Jealousy, Kidnapping, M/M, Minor Character Death, Original Character Death(s), Past Rape/Non-con, Platonic Cuddling, Plot, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rape/Non-con Elements, Stalking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-29
Updated: 2018-01-04
Packaged: 2018-11-21 05:08:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 65
Words: 183,621
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11350503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Denrhea/pseuds/Denrhea
Summary: Relocating to St. Petersburg pulled all of Yuuri's anxiety to the forefront as he now lived in the same country as his attackers, Victor's old boyfriend shared their apartment for the time being, and he had to make his own place in a new rink.  And now with the attack out in the open, Yuuri doesn't know quite what to expect with his fellow competitors as well as repercussions from his attackers.TRIGGER WARNING:  This will reference past rape.  This might have further violence and non-con elements.  I will try and warn you ahead of time in the chapters at hand but this stands as an overall warning.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> TRIGGER WARNING: This will reference past rape. This might have further violence and non-con elements. I will try and warn you ahead of time in the chapters at hand but this stands as an overall warning. 
> 
> If you are starting with this story, back up and start with PART 1 of the series.
> 
> This work is FINISHED. You are welcome to leave comments but I may not necessarily reply. I am interacting with the current part being written.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri arrives in St. Petersburg and faces his new roommate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the edits, [BluSkates](http://archiveofourown.org/users/BluSkates/pseuds/BluSkates). And I appreciate the extra set of eyes and all of the comments, [Magrathea](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Magrathea/pseuds/Magrathea). Please check out their works!

* * *

 

 

Victor felt a gentle nudging and was roused from his sleep to smile up towards his companion.  “Hey, sleeping beauty,” Yuuri murmured, his warm eyes washing over Victor’s face.

 

Victor straightened up and shivered, the cabin blanket falling down to his waist, hating the disorientation he always had when he slept in flight.  “How much longer?”

 

“Not much longer.  They are going to start their descent soon and I thought you would want to walk around a moment before the seatbelt lights came on,” Yuuri’s voice caressed him even as his hand slid down Victor’s arm until it wrapped around his hand, giving it a squeeze.

 

Victor nodded, appreciating the thought as he started to rise.  Leaning forward he brushed a kiss against his partner’s forehead.  “Thank you,” he murmured.  Sliding from the confines of the seat, he reached into the compartment above and found a small travel bag.  He walked up the aisle and found the bathroom.  Yuuri knew he needed to reset his appearance and he appreciated that.

 

In the tiny bathroom, Victor first took care of his immediate needs before turning to the sink to straighten himself up.  Washing his face, reapplying moisturizer and lip balm was followed by dampening a comb in order to settle his sleep-spiked hair.  He screwed his expression as he surveyed the results.  It would have to do.

 

His partner was standing and reordering some of their belongings when he walked up behind him.  “Are you ready?”

 

Yuuri glanced over his shoulder and cocked an eyebrow.  “Rarely when it comes to you, Vitya.”

 

Victor grinned.  “In less than an hour, we’ll be in Russia and I can show you my world.”

 

The seatbelt sign came on forcing the couple, as well as a few other passengers who were milling around, to wrap up their activities and take a seat.  Securing the seatbelt, Victor leaned towards his lover, lacing his fingers with Yuuri’s.  He felt the younger man’s head droop against his shoulder and knew Yuuri hadn’t slept much.  “I’ll let you catch up on your sleep first, _lyubov moya_.”

 

“I just want to see the girls.  I hate that they had to ride below,” Yuuri pouted, missing their four-legged companions.  “Is someone picking us up?”

 

“I talked to Yakov but we decided that I would hire a ride since we had so much with the dogs and our luggage.”

 

Yuuri snuggled into Victor and nodded.  Every sign that the younger man’s energy was flagging started flaring.  “I’m sorry that I got mad earlier, Vitya,” he whispered.

 

“It’s okay, my Yuuri.  I shouldn’t have blindsided you.  I promise I tried to find the words sooner.”

 

* * *

 

Standing at the pickup zone and waiting for their ride, Victor looked up, his face falling at the sight coming towards him.   _Damnit, Sasha, this is not the time._ He pasted a smile on his face and greeted the man walking towards them.  “Sasha, what a surprise,” he greeted tightly.  “Allow me to introduce my Yuuri.  Yuuri, this is Sasha.  He has apparently come to greet us at the airport.”

 

Victor watched the myriad of emotions playing across his boyfriend’s face as Sasha came forward.  “Oh, you are more adorable in person, Yuuri!  I mean, the pictures don’t do you justice,” the other Russian effused taking both of Yuuri’s hands and swinging his arms wide as if to take a look at him.

 

Yuuri was speechless at first and Victor could feel his partner growing overwhelmed by the surprise and invasion of space.  Victor rubbed circles on his back to ground him.  “Oh, um, thank you?  I’m sorry, we weren’t expecting you.  I’m afraid I don’t travel well.”  Yuuri peeked up at Victor under his fringe and the older man smiled reassuringly.

 

“I couldn’t bear the thought of nobody greeting you,” Sasha continued.  “When I heard Yakov wasn’t coming, I just took it upon myself.”

 

“Well, we’ve already arranged for a ride.  I suppose…” Victor shook his head uncertainly as he looked at Sasha.  “…maybe you can ride back with us.”

 

“That sounds great.  It will give me a chance to get to know my new roommate.”  The younger Russian was all smiles and eagerness as his hand brushed down Yuuri’s arm to give his hand a squeeze.

 

There it was, the expected tensing of Yuuri’s muscles.  Victor continued to rub circles on Yuuri’s back as the van came to a stop.  “Nikiforov party?” the driver asked and Victor nodded, guiding Yuuri into the second row of seats before helping the driver load their dogs.

 

“Sasha, why don’t you ride in the front seat with the driver and direct him to our apartment?” Victor suggested when he spotted Sasha starting to climb in after Yuuri.

 

The other man quirked a questioning eyebrow but nodded.  “Okay, I can do that.”

 

“Good.  I’m quite tired from the journey and that would be very helpful.”

 

Taking the seat next to Yuuri, he caught the look of exasperation Yuuri offered before he hid it over with a mask of politeness.  Sasha gave the driver the address and began talking animatedly towards the other two passengers.  Yuuri blinked rapidly and could feel himself becoming overwhelmed.  Victor reached over and took his hand before turning to Sasha and smiled as he waited for a break in the flow of conversation.  “I think my Yuuri will function better after he’s rested.  With all of this information, he needs to process a little more slowly.  Can we hold this conversation until later, Sasha?”

 

“Oh, I’m sorry.  I didn’t think.”  The other man smiled apologetically and Yuuri offered a thin smile in return.

 

* * *

 

Arriving at the condo, Yuuri was surprised that there was a doorman.  “Do you live in a hotel?”

 

“There are some perks to the condo fees here,” Victor stated with a grin.  “Let’s get our girls out and let them walk a bit.  Sasha? Since you’re here, would you follow our things up so that we can go ahead and walk the dogs?”

 

“Oh, sure Vitya.”

 

Yuuri stiffened slightly in Victor’s hold.  Soon a leash settled in Yuuri’s other hand and they moved to the nearby dog park, Victor cooing softly to both dogs.  Yuuri walked to a bench and collapsed.  Watching his partner, he frowned.  Victor looked up, his eyes begging askance.  “I’m sorry.  I didn’t ask him to meet us.”

 

“I know…Vitya,” Yuuri murmured.  Sighing, he shrugged.  “I’m tired and it makes me a bit sensitive.”

 

“Are you ready to go up and see your new home?” Victor asked hopefully.  Yuuri nodded, taking his hand as Victor tugged him up.  They walked back towards the building and Yuuri found himself hesitating at the entrance.  “I know it’s a big step, Yuuri, but we’ve been together since January.  This is just a formality.”

 

“Okay.  You’re right,” Yuuri responded, nodding.  Too much information, too much change, and Yuuri was fighting his own anxiety.  He was thankful Victor accepted him with all of his flaws.  His partner led him inside and greeted the staff.

 

“I’ll introduce you later after you’ve rested, _solnyshko_ ,” Victor murmured as he led Yuuri to the elevator.  “We’re on the top floor,” he added as he hit the button just before rooftop.  “This building has a number of amenities including a gym and indoor pool.”

 

“So you _do_ live in a hotel,” Yuuri deadpanned.  Victor chuckled in reply as the door closed and the elevator began its ascent.

 

Soon the door opened and Victor led him out into the hall.  “I chose this apartment because of the high ceilings and modern design.”

 

“That’s quite different considering we just made an offer on a traditional ryokan,” Yuuri pointed out.

 

Victor laughed as he reached the door.  Yuuri reached out and traced the numbers.  This was his home.  Looking over at Victor who paused while Yuuri assimilated his surroundings, he nodded allowing Victor to open the door.

 

Modern was the only word to describe the space.  The ceiling soaring above them, an open concept floorplan, and clean lines in the furniture.  Yuuri stepped into the space thankful that Sasha had disappeared for this moment.   Running his hand down the back of the couch, he saw the chef grade stove and smiled at the thought of cooking in that kitchen.  The large window beyond let in plenty of light.  Yuuri turned to face Victor with a warm smile even as his eyes grazed over the framed artwork highlighting figure skating.

 

“Do you like it?” Victor asked, a little anxiety lilting his voice.

 

Yuuri nodded.  “Yes.  It’s very much…you.  I don’t know how my things are going to fit here, though.”

 

“Nonsense,” Victor stated, brushing his protests aside.  As he unleashed the dogs, he continued.  “It’s your home as well.  Your things go where you want them.”     

 

“Thank you, Vitya.  Where do we…sleep?” Yuuri asked the question feeling a blush rise up in his cheeks.

 

Victor grinned and opened the door while watching him.  “It’s probably a mess stacked with boxes.  I told Sasha to just put our packages inside.” Turning, Victor stilled.  “Oh.”

 

Yuuri entered the space, his eyes moving around the room.  Then as his eyes fell on the photos Phichit gave them from the gallery show, his eyes went wide.  It was then that he picked up on what caused Victor to hesitate.  Stepping into the room, he waved Victor inside.  The other man entered, closing the door behind him.  “He went through our stuff?” Yuuri hissed.

 

“I told him not to bother with anything, to just stack the boxes inside our room.”  Victor studied Yuuri for a long moment, his expression pained.  “Yuuri, are you okay?”

 

Yuuri took several deep breaths.  “I…want to be okay,” he clipped.  “But at the moment, I can honestly say that I’m not.  Some of these photos…were not even in the show.  They were…private.”  He walked towards the closet and opened it.  His shoes were neatly lined against the wall, his dresses hanging with the rest of his clothes, precisely organized, showing the level of thought that went into placement.  “Vitya, he put our clothes away.  He saw…my shoes, my dresses.”  Then Yuuri’s eyes went wide.  He went over to the chest of drawers and started opening drawers, finding one with neatly folded bits of lingerie.  Looking up to meet Victor’s eyes, he dropped to his knees, shaking his head.  “No…I don’t like this, Victor.  I can’t…”

 

“I’ll go talk to him,” Victor stated.  He walked out of the room leaving Yuuri to process what had taken place.

 

* * *

 

 

Victor located Sasha in his room.  He looked up from his drawing pad.  “Hey, did you like the surprise?”

 

Victor fought to keep his anger out of his voice.  “I’m sure you meant well but my Yuuri is very private and he’s not comfortable with the idea of you going through his things.”

 

“I only meant to put them away, Vitya.  I didn’t know it would cause a problem.  I thought it would make you settle in better.”  Sasha stared at him with wide eyes.  “I’ll go apologize,” he determined, standing up.

 

Victor shook his head as he held his hand up to stop him.  “Give Yuuri a couple of days and some space.  Please tell me you have something in the works.”

 

“I looked at something yesterday but it won’t be available for a couple of months.  I did push my studio equipment to one side of the living space but if you need me to move it in here, I suppose…I can squeeze it in here.”

 

“I’m not upset about your studio equipment.  I’m just…” Victor drew a deep breath.  “Please be respectful of Yuuri’s privacy.  You know he’s been through a lot.”

 

Sasha chewed his lip and nodded.  “ _Da_.  I saw the newscast which only filled in the blanks.  I’d already guessed some of it.”

 

“Thank you.  I’m trying to make this work so that you can find something.  Just…don’t take too long.”

 

“I really am trying, Vitya.  I’ve got half of my things in storage.  I don’t like this either.”

 

Victor nodded.  “I’m going to get back to Yuuri.  We’ll talk more later.”

 

* * *

 

Victor found Yuuri curled up in bed, his wet hair peeking out of the top of the covers showing that he had found the shower and washed off.  He slid in behind his lover and Yuuri wrinkled his nose.  “You smell like the trip.”

 

Victor chuckled.  “I suppose I could use a shower.  I just wanted to check on you first.”

 

“I’m probably just overreacting,” Yuuri murmured apologetically.  “You know I’m not at my best after we’ve traveled.”

 

“I’ll shower and you rest.”  Standing, he whistled.  “Cocoa, Makka, find Yuuri!”  The two dogs bounded onto the bed and he heard a soft laugh escape the covers as two noses started sniffing the covers.

 

Half an hour later, Victor joined Yuuri and the dogs for a nap feeling Yuuri shift into his arms.  “Sleep well, my Yuuri,” he murmured as he settled into the old, familiar bedding.

 

* * *

 

 

Yuuri woke up in the unfamiliar space, long shadows telling him it was late evening.  Victor was gone but the dogs lazed around next to him.  Yuuri looked around the space but couldn’t shake the sense of violation he felt.  A stranger had touched his most personal belongings…without his permission. He tried to swallow the feeling as he shuffled to the bathroom and straighten himself up.  He needed to eat something.

 

Entering the living space, he found Victor in the kitchen cooking and chatting companionably with Sasha while the other man sat at the counter sketching. Yuuri rubbed his eyes sleepily as Victor turned, casting a wide smile upon seeing him.  “Good evening, sleeping beauty!”

 

“Hello.  What are you cooking?” Yuuri asked as the scent hit him and caused his mouth to water.

 

Victor’s eyes lit up with excitement.  “[ Zharkoye ](https://spinthegloberecipes.wordpress.com/2014/07/24/zharkoye-russian-beef-stew/)!  Yakov would make it when I was younger and living with him.”

 

“Yakov cooks?” Yuuri asked with raised eyebrows.

 

Victor laughed.  “Well, Lilia certainly couldn’t.  He said he had to learn as a matter of survival.  But some things he picked up from his mother and grandmother.”

 

Soon, the dutch oven was removed from the heat and Victor lifted the lid for Yuuri to truly enjoy the sight of the[ meal](https://foodperestroika.files.wordpress.com/2010/10/skovorodka-zharkoye-small.jpg).  Serving up bowls, Yuuri took his first bite with a very pleased yummy sound slipping from his lips.

 

“You like it?” Victor asked, his eyes sparkling.

 

“Yes, it tastes like warmth and welcoming and is the perfect first meal in our home,” Yuuri responded.

 

Sasha watched the scene play out with a contemplative smile as he enjoyed his own bowl of stew.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you like how this starts out! Thank you for reading!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Piroshkis make everything all better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, BluSkates and Magrathea! I appreciate the edits and the reading more than you know! And the discussion, well :D 
> 
> Thank you, everyone, for reading!

* * *

 

Yuuri rested for the next two days by Victor’s order.  Victor went to his old rink the day before for a half day of practice while Yuuri napped off and on.  Left alone in their home, several times Yuuri had started to get up and leave only to hear Sasha in the next room and lose his nerve.  By the time Victor returned, Yuuri was pacing the room like a caged animal.  “Yuuri,” he chided softly.  “You aren’t restricted to our room.”

 

“I’m sorry,” the brunette responded, wringing his hands.  “Every time I started to leave, my feet stuttered because I heard him out there.  I know it doesn’t make sense.  I know it’s an anxiety tick.  But…it doesn’t help me walk out that door.”

 

Victor pulled Yuuri into his arms.  “I’m sorry.  I knew it would be uncomfortable but I didn’t think about how it would affect your anxiety.”

 

“I can’t explain the feeling I get around him.  I’m just uncomfortable.”

 

“You don’t do well with new people,” Victor surmised.

 

Yuuri shook his head.  “That’s not it.  Something…feels off.  I hate this.  I can’t explain it…it just is.”

 

“You are just having a hard time in the transition.  Let’s take the dogs for a walk.  You’ve been cooped up in the bedroom since last night.”

 

“O-okay,” Yuuri answered.

 

Victor guided Yuuri out of the room and Sasha looked up and offered a charming smile.  “Good afternoon, sleepyhead,” he greeted.  “I would have made lunch if you woke up in time.”

 

“Oh…um…thank you?”  Yuuri looked up to Victor as if checking to see if his response was acceptable.

 

Victor squeezed Yuuri’s hand before turning to the artist.  “Yuuri and I are going to take a walk so I can acquaint him with the neighborhood a bit.  If Yura or Mila stop by, tell them we’ll be back soon.”

 

“Oh, okay,” Sasha replied, waving as they walked out the door.

 

Yuuri didn’t even notice when the lead was placed in his hand.  “Is Yura coming by?  Since when do you call him Yura?”

 

“I’ve always called him Yura or Yuratchka in Russia.  I just went along with Yurio to annoy the angry kitten.”

 

“Oh.  I knew he didn’t like it so I stopped,” Yuuri murmured.

 

“That’s why you’re the favorite,” Victor teased.  “He’s like a kid brother to me.  It is in the law of brothers that I have to annoy him.”

 

Yuuri smiled at that explanation.  “You didn’t answer the question.”

 

“They both asked if they could stop by to see you.  I suggested they come by and we could go out for dinner.  Georgi might join us if his girlfriend agrees.”

 

“And…Sasha?”

 

“I didn’t invite him but he has a way of inviting himself.  So fair warning.”

 

Yuuri frowned.  “Okay.  I really am trying to be fine with this, Vitya.”

 

Victor leaned forward and brushed a kiss on Yuuri’s forehead.  “You can’t help your anxiety.  Once we get you situated at the rink, I’ll look at those contacts Sasaki-sensei made for us.  If they can’t get us in, I’ll call the crisis counselor that saw me before.”

 

“Maybe I do just need to see a therapist…with the transition and all.  I could be projecting all of that stress on Sasha.  I’m sorry.  I’ve not been fair.”

 

“Don’t worry about it, Yuuri.”

 

“He must think I’m horribly rude,” Yuuri began to fret, pulling at his sleeves.

 

“Now you are redirecting that stress onto yourself, Yuuri,” Victor pointed out.  “I want this to be your home but if you can’t settle here, we  _ will _ go back to Hasetsu and somehow make it work.”

 

“That’s not fair to you,” Yuuri countered.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

They arrived back at the apartment to find it empty and a note from Sasha saying he was checking on an apartment lead.  “See?  He’s working on it.”

 

Yuuri frowned.  “I suppose.  Any word from the others?”  As if on cue, a text rang through.

 

“They are on their way up,” Victor returned.  He watched the smile touch Yuuri’s lips with a bit of relief.  He hated this anxiety, but should have expected it.  Now, though, he just wanted to help him relax and transition while he rebuilt his lover’s support network.

 

A buzz at the door announced their friends’ arrival and the two younger skaters came into the room.  “Yuuri!” Mila greeted running over to give him a hug.  Yuuri returned it warmly.  “I can’t believe you’re here!  I can’t wait for us to skate together.”

 

“Tomorrow,” he promised.  “Vitya wanted me to get another day of rest.  I never travel well.”

 

“Oh, I understand.  My sister is just like that.  Has to thoroughly sleep it off.”

 

“How is everyone else doing?” Yuuri asked with a smile.

 

Mila was eager to share the latest rink gossip and quickly delved into it.  “Georgi is dating Anya and is beyond ridiculous.  Her brother Alexei just walks off anymore when Georgi approaches.”

 

“He is obsessed,” Yuri added with disgust.  “You two aren’t nearly as gross.”

 

Yuuri and Victor chuckled in reply.  “Are they joining us?” Victor asked.

 

“Nope.  Anya didn’t want to hang out with us.  We’re such children.”  Mila rolled her eyes.

 

Yuuri smiled.  “I don’t mind hanging out with you.  Where are we going?”

 

“For Piroshkis,” Yuri declared.  “Not my grandpa’s but I know a decent stand.”

 

“Well, lead the way,” Yuuri smiled.   _ I don’t feel uncomfortable with my rink mates.  What makes Sasha different? _  He kept his smile in place as they left the building.

 

The stand was not too far of a walk away and Mila kept it lively with more gossip as Yuri provided snarky comments along the way.  At some point, Yuuri asked, “Are you the youngest, Yura?”

 

The blond shrugged.  “At the moment.  I know Yakov is looking at a couple that are getting ready to move up into the Junior division soon.  I think Pyotr is going to work with them now that he’s retired.”

 

“That injury never did set right,” Victor stated sadly.

 

Yuri nodded.  “Yakov offered him the position after he got the news.”

 

“Katya isn’t sure if she’s going to continue after this season.  She is thinking about going back to uni to finish her psychology degree,” Mila added.

 

“And Dmitry?” Victor asked.

 

“Still going strong though frustrated he’s not improving as fast as he’d like.  He’s excited you’ve returned for the season.”

 

Yuuri listened intently to the stories of Victor’s rink mates as he inquired after each one, remembering how Victor had described himself as their big brother.  This was Victor’s family, the people that he held dear.  And Yuuri had kept him from this.  He had to find a way to make it work.  Sasha be damned!  He would have to work through whatever this intense dislike for the man seemed to be based on.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

They brought extra piroshkis back with them and happily waved at the other two skaters as they left to head to their home.  “Where do they live?” Yuuri asked as they entered the foyer of the building.

 

“There is a building that dorms a number of the rink’s athletes.  It has one bedroom and studio apartments.  I lived there until I felt ready to move out on my own.  I think Georgi is the only other one outside the dorm.”

 

“I hope it is better than my old college dorm.”

 

“Well, even the efficiencies have kitchenettes.  However, I sometimes invite a few of the other skaters over for dinner.  Now that we are back, and with you here, I think we can expect Yura often.  I love to cook and it gives me a reason to go all out.”

 

“I’ve noticed that about you.  I look forward to more.”

 

Victor grinned.  “See!  I’m not totally useless!”

 

“You still have a cleaning lady,” Yuuri pointed out.

 

Victor shrugged.  “I enjoy cooking, not so much cleaning.”

 

“Oh, Vitya.”  Yuuri felt his mood shift when he entered the apartment and spotted Sasha.  Drawing a deep breath, he forced himself to be pleasant.  “Good evening, Sasha.  We brought piroshkis for you.”

 

The artist’s eyes widened as he accepted the bag.  “Oh!  Thank you.  That’s very thoughtful.”

 

“How did the apartment lead pan out?” Victor asked.

 

Sasha frowned.  “They wanted too much up front.  I can’t afford to completely deplete my savings in case I have a bad month or two.  Commissions aren’t always steady.”

 

“Keep trying.  I’m sure something will show up,” Victor encouraged.  Victor heard scratching in the bedroom.  “I suppose I should take the darlings out.  I’ll be right back, Yuuri.”

 

Alone with Sasha, Yuuri sat down on the couch trying to force himself to become comfortable.  “I don’t bite,” the other man teased.

 

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Yuuri shifted.  “I’m just not very good with new people.  I hope you aren’t offended.”

 

Sasha turned to face him, holding his eyes.  “How can I make you more comfortable?”

 

Yuuri felt his skin prickling under the heat of that gaze.  “I-I’m not sure?  I suppose…we’ll get used to each other in time?”

 

“You should let me sketch you,” Sasha suggested, his smile inviting except Yuuri was reminded of fairy tales he read in his childhood.  Not the good kind but the ones that sent him shivering under the covers.

 

“I’m not sure I’d be comfortable with that.  Certainly without Victor’s permission, I wouldn’t,” Yuuri protested even as he shoved his fingers through his hair.

 

“We live in the same apartment.  Of course Victor will be fine with it,” the other man chuckled, moving over to the couch.  

 

Again Yuuri flinched.  Something felt off and he couldn’t put his finger on it.  “I don’t think…”

 

“I’ve sketched many of my friends.  It’s a great way to get to know one another,” Sasha soothed, running a hand down Yuuri’s arm.  Yuuri jerked away and scrambled off the couch.

 

The door opened startling Yuuri.  “They were so rowdy this evening,” Victor was saying as he stepped into the room, the two dogs scurrying past him.  He focused his eyes on Yuuri.  “Are you okay,  _ lyubov moya _ ?”

 

“I-I think…I just need to lie down for a bit.”  Yuuri fled the room.  He could hear the buzz of the two men conversing as he buried himself into the sheets.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what's on your minds?


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri joins Victor on the ice in St. Petersburg. He is warmly welcomed once more by Victor’s rink mates. There will be some sexy times in this chapter and some trading places. (And we all can use a little fluff at this point.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you , BluSkates, for the edits. This one seemed like it was hard work. Thanks also to Magrathea for reading this through for me.
> 
> Long chapter...but it has some fluffy bits.

* * *

 

 

 

Yuuri woke up early, restless from sleeping too much the previous day.  Looking at his phone, he knew it was too early to head to the rink.  Instead, he used the flashlight app to dig out his clothes, hoping he wasn’t matching blue and black socks in the process and disappeared into the bathroom.

 

Once he knew he wouldn’t disturb Victor he turned on the light in the private bathroom and studied the shadows of his stress settling under his eyes in the mirror.   _ With as much sleep as I’ve had I shouldn’t need concealer, but here I am.  I’ve got to get myself together.  What did he actually say?  I’m probably misreading the entire situation.  I’m just projecting all of the stress of the move on one person. _

 

He reached into the shower and turned the knobs, letting the water temperature settle.  The steam started building and he stepped into the embrace of the water.  Victor had a number of options and differing jets that Yuuri would have to explore someday, but for now the water was soothing simply raining over his body, the droplets gathering and pooling as they raced down the surface of his skin.  He stood still under the water for a long time before finally gathering a cloth and washing.

 

Running his hand over his face he knew he needed a close shave, the stubble making their appearance known.  He began working the facial cleanser into his skin hoping it would help with the shadows.  A skincare routine came along with the harsh cosmetics they all had to sometimes use in performances.  Granted, not everyone had such a flare as Georgi, but… he enjoyed the dramatic effect of the stage makeup.  But it did work a number on his skin.  A fellow dancer, Julia, had dragged him to a cosmetic counter and introduced him to proper skin care after she noticed him scrubbing his skin with body soap and a face cloth.  Through several sessions, he learned what worked for him and that it also helped with the stress his anxiety placed on his skin.  Yuuri smiled to himself knowing that Victor loved the feel of his skin and had commented on its softness more than once.

 

Finishing his shower, he stepped out and determined to make use of the time to shave, pulling out the razor, shaving lotion, facial wash, and moisturizer, organizing them for order of use.  With his face still supple from the shower, he took the shaving brush and applied the lotion in a circular motion.  Satisfied with the coverage, he double checked his blade before he started shaving with the grain.  He only closely shaved once a week.  The rest of the time he used his electric razor.  But today he would join his new rink mates for the first time.  Today he would be his first time officially working with Yakov.  Rinsing the blade one last time, he checked to see if anything needed to be touched up before putting it away.  He then rinsed his face with the facial wash and batted his skin dry, and finished by rubbing a in thin layer of moisturizer to cover his face.

 

Checking his reflection, he decided the self-care paid off, the shadows had at least receded.  He combed his hair and dressed for a run to the rink knowing he’d wait for Victor.  In the meantime, he gathered the keys to the apartment and the leashes.  The dogs had been waiting patiently since he started stirring about.

 

It occurred to him that this was the first time he went out on his own since arriving to Russia.  The routineness of the morning had worked to relax him and Yuuri shoved his remaining anxiety into the back corners of his mind.  He breathed in the brisk morning air, spotting the graying on the horizon.  Victor told him that by winter the days would shorten to around six hours.  He made sure he brought his reflective clothes for those morning and evening runs.

 

Cleaning up after the dogs, he guided them back into the building and smiled a greeting at the morning staff.  Most didn’t know English and none knew Japanese, so he got by with a translator app on his phone.  Returning to the elevator, he smiled to himself, relishing the quiet embrace of the early morning, the time setting his thoughts at ease.  No Sasha…he would sleep until almost nine, past the time that he and Victor would leave for the rink.

 

Entering the apartment, he released the dogs whispering commands to go wake Victor.  Yuuri chuckled at the groan of protest from the other room as he started the pot of coffee and his tea pot.  He found his way around the kitchen and began to prepare his normal breakfast.  Soon, Yuuri felt Victor behind him, sliding his arms around his waist.

 

“Good morning,  _ lyubov moya _ .  It’s good to see you like this.”

 

“I need to return to routine.  I’ve already taken the dogs out,” he continued preparing their meal.

 

“You’ve showered and shaved, too,” Victor murmured, sliding an appreciative hand over the smooth surface.  Glancing at the clock, Victor tilted his head thoughtfully as he ran his hand over his own face.

 

“You don’t have time.  I won’t be late for my first day at the rink,” Yuuri stated with a raised eyebrow.

 

“Such a slave driver!” Victor pouted as he accepted his bowl of eggs and rice.

 

“I’ll get you up early tomorrow,” Yuuri compromised.  The tea strainer settled into his mug and he waited for it to steep.

 

Victor motioned towards the cup.  “Is that some of your mother’s tea?”

 

“Yes, I stashed some in our luggage.  There will be more that arrives with the items we shipped.”

 

“I’m so spoiled.  I miss Hasetsu already,” Victor pouted once more.

 

Yuuri nodded quietly, murmuring, “As do I.”

 

 

* * *

  

 

They were running late and an exasperated Yuuri set a brutal pace for the run to the rink.  When Victor whined, Yuuri only increased his speed forcing Victor to be quiet and focus on his breathing.  They entered the rink with moments to spare and were greeted by a surprised Yakov glancing at his watch.  “Vitya, that’s the first time you’ve been on time since I’ve known you.  Perhaps Katsuki will be good for you.”

 

Victor, bent over and breathing hard, gave a wavering smile of agreement.  The next twenty minutes were spent introducing Yuuri to his knew rink mates and showing him around the facility in a brief tour.  What Yuuri really wanted was to be on the ice, and Victor knew that.  Soon he satisfied his boyfriend’s yearning.

 

Victor watched a happy, vibrant Yuuri walk back with him towards their condo, a bounce in his step that had been missing since their initial move.  The ice worked its wonders on his boyfriend.  “We should go out tonight,” Victor suggested.

 

Yuuri raised an eyebrow.  “We have practice tomorrow,” he pointed out.

 

“It doesn’t have to be anything late.  Dinner…just the two of us.  I know a few places nearby.  Maybe not so nice to require reservations.”

 

Yuuri tilted his head and smiled indulgently.  “Not everything in life needs to be over-the-top, Vitya.  Remember the ramen stands we frequented?  I enjoyed those as well.  It’s the company that makes the difference.”

 

“I just…I want you to be happy here,” Victor stated, fighting the pout that was pushing through his expression.

 

Yuuri shrugged and offered a small smile.  “I’m sure I will be.  I just need time.  But today…it’s a good day.  So I agree.  Let’s go out and enjoy it.”

 

Walking through the door, Yuuri headed straight to their room ignoring Sasha.  Victor stopped to converse briefly before joining him.  He could hear Yuuri already in the shower.  Stripping down, he stepped in and asked, “Mind if I join you.”

 

Yuuri squeaked.  “You caught me off guard.  Of course, Vitya.”

 

Victor stepped into the shower his eyes sliding down Yuuri appreciatively.  He reached out and tugged Yuuri into his arms, his lips seeking out the younger man’s.  “I miss our intimacy,” he murmured as he released him.

 

Yuuri smiled apologetically.  “I know…I haven’t been myself since we’ve arrived.”

 

“If you need more time, I’m okay with that.  I just…want you to know I miss you,” Victor reassured.

 

Yuuri’s eyes dropped down unseeing before he lifted his chin and reached out to return Victor’s kiss, pressing forward.  “I miss this, too,” he murmured against the other man’s lips.  He opened his mouth to deepen the kiss feeling Victor’s hands tighten their hold on his back, continuing to assault the other man’s senses as Yuuri pressed kiss after kiss, becoming demanding.

 

As the kiss broke, Victor chuckled.  “It’s a good thing we don’t have reservations,” he said lowly.  “Because I might just need to have my way with you before we leave.”

 

Yuuri laughed against Victor’s shoulder.  “Which would lead to another shower and we’d never get out the door.”

 

Victor straightened up.  “You’re right.  I guess I’ll just have to blow you and be done with it,” he added with a raised eyebrow.

 

“Only…if you promise more later.”

 

“There is always room for dessert,” Victor promised.  “I just need an…appetizer.”  Victor’s fingers traced Yuuri’s length as the younger man’s breath caught.

 

* * *

 

 

Yuuri reached for the drawer that held his boxer briefs when he saw a hand reach up and touch the one holding his lingerie.  Yuuri stared at that hand a moment before shaking his head.  “I…can’t,” he said quietly.  Looking over to see a disappointed pout on his lover’s face, he sighed.  “He’s touched those as well as other things I’d rather have kept private.  I…can’t wear them.  Not as long as he’s here.”  He held Victor’s gaze, the look of resignation on his face.  “I’m sorry…it’s how I feel.”

 

Victor nodded finally.  “I just thought…once we were here…”

 

“It was supposed to be different.  But you made promises.  Now…we have to wait.  His presence…makes me too uncomfortable.”

 

“I keep hoping you’d be okay with this…at least until he’s found a place,” Victor stated quietly.

 

Yuuri sighed, feeling the mood sour.  “I really am trying…I hope you believe me.  Just…something doesn’t click between us.”

 

“He seems to like you, Yuuri,” Victor returned softly.

 

Yuuri shrugged.  “You can’t force me to like him.  It doesn’t work that way.”

 

“I know.  It’s not about him.  Really.  I just hate for you to be uncomfortable in your own home.  Here, at the very least, you should be able to be yourself.”

 

“Thank you, Vitya,” Yuuri responded with a smile.  “I think…I needed to hear that.  I was afraid…you were upset with me.”

 

Victor shook his head emphatically.  “I couldn’t be upset with you.  I just…don’t want you to be mad at me.  I brought you into this mess.”

 

“I’m…not mad.  I’m just uncomfortable…and anxious.  I can’t seem to settle myself down when he is near.  At the rink, though, I feel fine.  I don’t know.  Some people just always make me feel uncomfortable.”

 

Victor sighed.  “I’ll keep pushing for him to find a place, Yuuri.  I just ask you to be patient.”

 

Yuuri nodded, reaching out to him, pulling him into an embrace.  “I am…kind of hungry.  I believe you promised me dinner?”

 

Victor’s smile broke through his tension.   “So I did.  Let’s finish getting ready.  Keep it casual.  There is a diner I want to take you to.”

 

 

* * *

 

 

With the temperature difference between St. Petersburg and Japan, Yuuri found himself wearing a light navy sweater with his jeans, a green and navy plaid collar peeking out the top.  Victor wore a long sleeved Henley in a dark shade of maroon.  Pulling their shoes on at the door, they waved at Sasha before leaving.  The other man watched them as they left in chaos with the dogs in their wake, a peculiar expression on his face.

 

“Are you sure they’ll be okay with the dogs?” Yuuri asked as he held onto Cocoa’s leash.

 

Victor grinned.  “First of all, you should never have trouble with Cocoa because she’s a service animal.  Secondly, yeah, they are used to me bringing Makka with me.”

 

“Okay, so take me to this restaurant that you frequent enough to be allowed to drag Makka along,” Yuuri invited and Victor could see a hint of that earlier smile.

 

The diner wasn’t far, just a block and a half from Victor’s building, which could be why the older man visited often.  “Vitya!” the owner bellowed as they entered.  “I heard you were back!”

 

“Ioseef!  How is your wife?” Victor returned warmly embracing the man in an apron.

 

He laughed warmly.  “Olga is at her sister’s.  I finally have some peace!  Who is this?”

 

“This is my Yuuri.  Yuuri, Ioseef is Yakov’s cousin.  He takes care of most of the skaters at the rink…kind of an extended family member.”

 

Yuuri smiled warmly and offered a shy hand.  “It’s nice to meet you.”

 

Ioseef looked at Victor before grabbing hold of Yuuri’s hand and pulling the boy in an embrace.  “Did you not hear the man?  We’re family!  Come, let me feed you.”

 

Yuuri was overwhelmed but not in a bad way, feeling the warmth of the old man.  “He acts very different from Yakov,” Yuuri whispered.

 

Victor chuckled.  “Very different…but once you get to know Yakov, you’ll see past that gruff exterior.”

 

They were seated in the back corner and Ioseef disappeared.  “Is there a menu?”

 

“It doesn’t matter,” Victor answered with a shrug.  “Ioseef will bring you whatever he thinks is appropriate.”

 

Yuuri frowned, startled by that revelation.  “We don’t order?”

 

“Well, I suppose if we weren’t ‘family’ we might.  But most people here are regulars.  So Ioseef just serves you up whatever.”

 

“Well that’s…interesting,” Yuuri responded.  What else could he say?

 

They were soon brought bowls filled with stuffed dumplings.  “ [ Pelmini ](http://natashaskitchen.com/2011/05/09/russian-pelmeni-recipe-new-dough-recipe/) !” Victor introduced to Yuuri.

 

Yuuri took his first bite and smiled.  “Wonderful!  It reminds me of a Chinese dumpling.”

 

“Right?  I want to introduce you to all of the good things.”

 

“I taste mushroom and onion.  I’m not sure what else is in the filling.”

 

“Minced meat,” Victor stated, adding after taking another bite, “These are pork but sometimes he makes it with beef.”

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

They arrived back home after sunset and Yuuri dropped down onto the couch glad to unwind.  Victor looked over a note left on the table.  “Hmmm, it appears Sasha is out for the evening with friends.  Said he’ll be back late.”

 

Yuuri’s eyes sharpened as he turned towards his boyfriend.  “You mean we are actually here…alone?”

 

Victor grinned and nodded, knowing exactly where Yuuri was going with that.  They only waited a few moments before racing to the bedroom.  Victor reached into the drawer of the nightstand and pulled out the lube and condoms he had retrieved from their luggage.  Yuuri was already half undressed.  Victor chuckled at Yuuri’s eagerness.  Pulling his shirt over his head, he crawled across the bed to meet his lover.

 

Yuuri raised an eyebrow as he reached an arm around Victor.  “You said something about dessert?”

 

“Mmmm,” Victor replied.  “But I want to savor you.”  He reached for Yuuri’s waistband and traced around to the button, releasing it along with the zipper before easing them down over Yuuri’s hip.  Yuuri lifted his hips to assist before Victor eased them the rest of the way down.  He returned to the man left in just his boxer briefs and socks sliding his hand over Yuuri’s defined abs, lips chasing after that touch, smiling at the tightening of muscles in response to his touch.  Fingers tugged at his hair demanding, he move further up as Yuuri pulled him into a deep demanding kiss, rolling Victor over to lie beneath him in bed.

 

“I’m at your mercy,” Victor murmured, his fingers feathering over the younger man’s cheek.  “For now,” he added with a wink.  Yuuri’s fingers tugged at his belt followed by the closures of his pants even as his lips took possession of his nipple.   Victor watched enraptured by the man  above him as Yuuri moved down his body, fingers sliding along the waistband.  The fabric give way and he lifted his hips, feeling the slide of Yuuri’s fingers down his thighs.  He heard the rustle of fabric as it hit the floor.  Focusing on the man at his feet, he watched as Yuuri drew off the last of his clothes before returning, working back up his body with strokes of his hands and kisses until he paused at Victor’s inner thighs.

 

He took his sweet time, kissing and sucking as Victor rewarded him with moans and gasps echoing through the room.  He felt Victor’s long fingers card through his hair once he was in reach.  His lips moved towards the crease between inner thigh and pelvis, pressing Victor’s leg back for greater access as he left another mark.  Victor whined and tugged at his hair even as Yuuri worried the spot before moving to the other thigh, tracing up the crease with his tongue.  He lifted his eyes to meet Victor’s with a wicked smile.

 

“Yuuri, will you…” Victor faded out uncertainly.

 

Yuuri held his eyes before he glanced to the door.  “I did say in Russia…”

 

Victor nodded, his eyes hopeful.  “We’re alone…and I do want you in me, my Yuuri.”

 

“I want that as well, Vitya,” he murmured, nodding in agreement.  He reached a shaky hand to pick up the lube.  Looking up at Victor, he voiced his fear.  “I don’t want to hurt you.”

 

“I know.  Take it slow, watch my face and listen to my responses.”

 

“What if I mess up?”

 

“Well, if it happens, we will laugh just as you’d laugh should I mess up.  Regardless, I trust you, Yuuri.  You love me too much to do anything to intentionally hurt me.”

 

Yuuri shrugged.  “I was more concerned about the unintentional.  But I do love you.  Is this what you really want?”

 

Victor nodded.  “It is, Yuuri.  I want to be yours.”

 

A smile tugged at his lips.  “You said that you became mine in December,” he reminded the silver haired man before him.

 

“So I did.  I want to take it to the next level.  I want us to share everything.  We’ve been open about discovering what we like with one another.  I want to discover this with you.”

 

“O-okay,” Yuuri agreed, rubbing his shaking hands along his legs.  “I-I think I need to kiss you first.”

 

Victor chuckled.  “Of course,  _ lyubov moya _ .  I always welcome your kisses.”  He reached down for the man between his legs and pulled him into an embrace.  The kiss began slow and tender.  Victor wanted to put the boy at ease.  Deepening the kiss, he did not ease up on the tenderness, slowly surrendering to the other man, relinquishing control.  As the kiss broke, he felt Yuuri’s lips ghost towards his ear finding that sensitive place on his neck just behind the lobe that brought forth a deep moan.  He could feel the kiss shift into teeth and sucking and not caring that Yuuri would leave a visible mark at this point.  This man could lay claim to any part of him and he’d welcome it.

 

Yuuri nipped and kissed his way down Victor’s collarbone as he sank further down the older man’s body.  Reaching down between them, Yuuri’s fingers teased Victor’s shaft with the barest of touches.  Frustrated grunts brought a smile to Yuuri’s lips as Victor lifted his hips to try to fill Yuuri’s hand.  Yuuri opened the hand and traced down the skin beneath with the backs of his nails.

 

Yuuri reached for the lubricant this time with a more purposeful grip, spreading the slick substance over his fingers with his thumb, warming it to the temperature of his skin.  Holding Victor’s eyes, he traced those fingers down the perineum to circle the entrance.  He swallowed and knew he needed something to occupy his mind.  Leaning forward, he ran a long lick up Victor’s cock and gained a gasp as his finger slipped past the barrier.  Bobbing down, he tracked messy kisses along the length as his finger slowly made its way up into the channel. Yuuri marveled at the tightness and how it squeezed around his finger and wondered how it would make way for another finger let alone his shaft.

 

Yuuri began to work the lone finger in and out as he heard the soft moans from the man beneath him, as he felt those long fingers card through his hair.  “Another,” slipped from those moaning lips and Yuuri prepared to insert the second finger.  He opened his lips over his head circling the corona with his tongue.  Sliding his tongue along the frenulum, he felt the entrance relax enough to slide in the second finger easing it along the channel next to the first.

 

Scissoring his fingers slowly, he began to stretch Victor as he reached deeper into him.  His mouth continued to suck and lick Victor until the Russian tugged his hair to pull him off.  “One more,” he asked.  Yuuri traced the third finger down the perineum to line up next to the others, reaching for more lube.  He watched in fascination as Victor’s entrance sucked in all three fingers.  Moving it in and out to Victor’s moans, he sought that bundle of nerves that would put him on edge.

 

“Nnnngg,” the silver haired man groaned as Yuuri found it, followed my several disjointed moans as his lover continued to abuse it with is touch.  “Now, Yuuri,” he broke through after several moments? Minutes?  Time seemed meaningless at this point.

 

Yuuri pulled his fingers free, reaching towards the condom.  He fumbled with the foil package a couple of times until he remembered Victor used his teeth.  The foil ripped and freed the latex.  Yuuri watched Victor enough times to remember how he did this, pinching the tip and rolling it on his hardness while thinking that perhaps at some point he should have had a dress rehearsal for this part.  Finally with it in place, he looked up to his lover.  “Are you still ready?” he whispered, biting his lip nervously, secretly afraid fumbling with safety took too long.

 

“Yes,” Victor answered, his eyes encouraging.

 

Yuuri lined up at the entrance and slowly pressed into the older man watching as Victor released a long, low moan as the head moved past the entrance.   _ Go slowly _ .  Yuuri watched his lover’s face as he eased into that channel.  And by god, slowly for sure or he’d lose it!  He found himself pausing for his own sake as well as Victor’s more than once.  Feeling Victor’s hand thread into his and squeeze it encouraging, Yuuri realized that they had begun to communicate through those tugs and squeezes until Yuuri was completely enveloped by that tight canal.  Breathing deep, he concentrated on not releasing.  Victor waited patiently, his eyes knowing.

 

Slowly Yuuri began to slide out, then in again.  Victor’s answering cry encouraged him.  The tightness, the friction, the push and pull took all of Yuuri’s concentration to hold himself together.  He shifted for a better angle and heard a confirming gasp from his lover.  He started increasing the speed until he had a solid rhythm, watching his lover’s face make the most beautiful expression, his lips releasing the sweetest sounds of pleasure.

 

Victor faded into an incoherent babble that intermingled Russian, French, English, and a few phrases he’d picked up in Japanese, as if his brain couldn’t settle on a language as Yuuri began to pound harder into him.  The echoing of skin slapping set a rhythm to the phrases escaping from his lover along with echoes of his name.

 

The older man reached down with one hand to stroke himself, finding his time with Yuuri.  Yuuri’s hands held firmly to Victor’s hips as his hips pistoned in, as his voice released a string of “Victor Victor Vitya Vitya…” fading to “…anata…love…beautiful Vitya…” as he rode through his orgasm.   Victor tumbled over the edge right after.

 

Yuuri carefully laid his lover down, pulling free of him.  Reaching for the wet wipes Victor kept on his nightstand, he cleaned up his lover before seeing to himself.  Removing the condom, he tied it off as he’d seen Victor do with him and dropped it in the nearby trashcan.  He grabbed another wipe to clean himself up.

 

Sliding in beside Victor, he pulled the comforter over them, gathering Victor to him.  “You’re shivering,” Yuuri observed.

 

“Just hold me, Yuuri,” Victor returned, vulnerability sliding into his voice.

 

Yuuri leaned his cheek against Victor’s head.  “Always, sweetheart.  Always.”

 

Yuuri held onto Victor as the older man faded into sleep.  He was almost asleep when he heard the outer door open and shut.  Blinking in the darkness, he listened until those footsteps faded into the opposite direction feeling his anxiety start to rise with Sasha’s return home.  He tapped the edge of the bed to signal to the dogs to join them, tangling his fingers into Cocoa’s curls.  The dog nosed his hand and licked his fingers until the relaxed, eventually allowing him to slip off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The recipe does not have mushroom but it’s not unusual for Pelmini to have mushroom and even turnip. It’s basically a meat dumpling.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eyes open.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much, BluSkates, for the edits. And your read through is always appreciated Magrathea!

* * *

 

 

Victor’s eyes opened, feeling gravelly as he stared at the ceiling.  Yuuri tossed and turned during the night, his murmurs in his sleep waking and alarming the Russian.  Victor soothed and tried to calm the brunette in his sleep.  Finally he settled but Victor did not sleep well as the night progressed.  He knew his Yuuri would have a hard morning.

 

Victor moved a little gingerly when he climbed out of bed a small smile touching his lips as he remembered Yuuri making love to him the night before.  Yuuri rose and guided him into the shower, rubbing his back until the ache went away.  “You are too good to me, my Yuuri,” he murmured.

 

“No, Vitya, we take care of each other.  That’s how this works,” Yuuri stated gently.  He worried about Victor, though.  Sighing several times as they prepared for their day, the silver haired man’s smile seemed forced.  As they left to walk to the rink Victor’s despondence kept him quiet, his gaze was off in the distance.  Finally, Yuuri’s worries forced him to ask, “Vitya, sweetheart, is everything okay?  Did I…hurt you last night?”

 

“No, my Yuuri.  You never hurt me,” Victor reassured him.  “I’m just…down today.  No particular reason.  I’m sorry the timing is so off because I’ve never felt more cared for then when I’m in your hands.”

 

“Are you sure?” Yuuri pressed.

 

Victor turned and smiled, taking Yuuri’s hand in his.  “I love you, my Yuuri, and I know you feel the same.  I…just…I want you to be happy here.  I’m trying to work through it.”

 

“But…last night…” Yuuri protested.

 

Victor sighed, offering a soft smile.  “Last night your nightmares returned, Yuuri.  I know Sasha’s presence has you upset and I’m…just trying to figure out how to make everything right.  I don’t always know the right thing to do, my Yuuri, but it makes me sad when I am failing so badly.”

 

“I…y-you are not failing, Vitya.  You are kind.  That’s what draws people to you.  That’s what drew me to you, making me feel safe.”

 

“But you don’t feel safe now,” Victor murmured.

 

Yuuri studied his shoes a moment before answering, “I’m here…in the same country as  _ them _ .  It sets me on edge.  I’m not going to feel safe for a while.  And Sasha…he has these quirks that make me uncomfortable.  But I don’t blame you.  I’m not upset with you.  I inherit your baggage just like you gain mine.  So I’ll deal with it for now.  Although…I will be happy when Sasha moves out.”

 

“So will I,” Victor admitted.

 

* * *

  
  
  


Victor skated in circles talking with Ivan and Dmitry.  “Yuuri is having a hard time with the transition.”

 

“What seems to be the problem?” Dmitry asked.

 

Victor ran his hand through his hair.  “Sasha…his very presence seems to be setting off Yuuri’s anxiety.”

 

Ivan tightened his jaw.  “Honestly, I can’t believe Yuuri isn’t more upset than he is.  My girlfriend would be livid if I moved an ex into our house.”

 

Dmitry grunted.  “Agreed.  Victor, what were you thinking?”

 

“I…he’s always taken care of my apartment.  I’ve kind of watched out for him since we after we stopped dating.  But this has never interfered with a current relationship.”  Victor studied the path of his skates.

 

Ivan and Dmitry exchanged glances.  “Are you sure it hasn’t?” Dmitry asked.  “I remember you arguing a few times with Chris over the matter.”

 

Victor frowned.  “I guess I didn’t remember that.  Do you think I’m wrong?”

 

“The fact that you are wondering makes me think you know the answer to that,” Ivan pointed out.

 

“If the roles were reversed, what would you think?” Dmitry pressed.

 

Victor shrugged.  “It’s hard to imagine.  Yuuri’s never really had a boyfriend.”

 

“Making this even harder for him.  You need to protect that,” Dmitry stated.

 

“Chris says I’m too nice,” Victor muttered.

 

“You are!” both Dmitry and Ivan echoed.

 

“Let’s get back to this anxiety business.  Does Yuuri often have anxiety without cause?” Dmitry asked.

 

Victor shook his head slowly.  “No.  I mean, it could be that he’s in an uncomfortable situation but there’s usually a cause.”

 

Dmitry stared hard at his friend.  “I’m just saying…perhaps you should watch the situation more closely.  There may be more going on than you realize.”

 

“But why wouldn’t Yuuri say something?” Victor asked in frustration.

 

Ivan thinned his lips.  “He might have already, but you haven’t heard him.  I don’t know.  Maybe his anxiety is lying to him.  But you are his boyfriend and protector.  You need to act like it.”

 

Victor nodded in resignation.  “You’re right.  I’ve…been trying to keep peace.  I need to be more watchful and figure out what’s going on.”

 

“And make sure your Yuuri feels safe,” Dmitry added. 

 

Victor sighed.  “I’m the worst boyfriend.”

 

“No, Vitya,” Ivan stated, as he placed a comforting hand on Victor’s shoulder.  Dmitry add his to the other shoulder.  “You just have a very kind and warm heart.  It’s sometimes hard for you to see the bad in other people.”

 

“But…for a long time I was so hypervigilant that Yuuri and I fought over it.”

 

“We don’t expect to see danger from our friends,” Dmitry pointed out.

 

Victor looked over at Dmitry, crestfallen.  “You think he’s dangerous, that I put my Yuuri in danger?”

 

“I honestly don’t know what to think,” Dmitry shrugged.  “I mean, Sasha never seemed possessive but I don’t know Sasha outside of a relationship.  I don’t know if he is after you or if he’s trying to stir up trouble or is simply just clueless.  It could be something else entirely.  But who is more important to you?”

 

“Yuuri,” Victor stated without hesitation.

 

“Then put him first and if that means you lose Sasha as a friend, then so be it,” Dmitry pressed.  “Family before friends.”

 

Victor nodded.  “Family before friends, always.  Thank you for helping me work through this.  I’ve missed my brothers.”

 

The other two grinned clapping him on the back.  “We’ve missed you, too.  We haven’t talked like this in some time.”

 

* * *

  
  


Yuuri stretched on the barre as he waited for Madame Lilia to finish her call.  When she joined him she sent him through a series of drills.  This he knew, he understood.  Skills tests usually led to increased responsibility and freedoms.  When Lilia learned that he had majored in dance, she asked him to meet her in the studio that afternoon.  As Yuuri wrapped up the test, she pursed her lips thoughtfully.  “You would have been a beautiful danseur,” she praised.  “Alas, you’re mistress is the ice.”

 

Yuuri smiled, meeting her eyes with his warm brown ones.  “I started in dance.  And I take that passion and discipline to the ice.  Have you given my request more consideration?”

 

“Yakov doesn’t like it when we give keys out,” she stated critically.  “Some skaters abuse it, become careless in an unobserved practice, and they get injured.”

 

Yuuri thinned his lips.  “I’m already bound to a promise of downgraded jumps unless Victor or Yakov are present.”

 

“Promises get broken,” she pointed out.  “Why is this so important to you?”

 

“Because…this is how I work through my anxiety.  I dance it off.  I’ve become spoiled, I suppose.  I’ve always had access to a studio and to ice.”

 

She huffed quietly.  “Yakov left the decision up to me.  If I hear of a single incident in which you’ve abused this privilege, I will take the keys back.  And don’t let Yura have them.”

 

“Of course not.  Is it okay if he accompanies me?”

 

“Sure.  Sure.  I’m not worried about you supervising dancers.  You have the skill and I can tell you’ve conducted lessons and classes.”

 

“I prefer one-on-one but yes.  Minako-sensei left me in charge of her studio and classes more than once when she was unable to attend them.  And I’ve helped choreograph as part of a team, and solo, several programs along the way.”

 

“I look forward to seeing your work, Yuuri.  Very well, here’s the key.  Guard it.”  She placed the key in his hand but her fingers lingered over the metal.  “Victor has his own key.  I’m surprised you don’t just borrow his when you need it.”

 

“Sometimes…Victor is the one I’m escaping,” he admitted with a wince.  “I prefer to work through some of my strong emotions before confronting him.”

 

She quirked her lip thoughtfully.  “I see.  I suppose I understand.  Many times when Yakov and I first married, he’d run off to the ice and I to the studio to work through our anger after a fight.”

 

Yuuri shrugged.  “I try to go before the fight…to clear my head.”

 

“And does it work?” she asked doubtfully.

 

“Sometimes,” Yuuri admitted.

 

She grunted.  “Well, be safe.”

 

“Always.”

 

* * *

  
  
  


Victor worked in the kitchen, humming as he chopped apples, potatoes, onions, and celery for the  [ Hungarian apple stew ](http://www.eatingwell.com/recipe/249489/hungarian-apple-soup/) he had determined to make earlier at the rink.  Yuuri cleaned house in the meantime, efficiently picking up and straightening the living space before moving on to the bedroom.  He emerged several minutes later with an armload of laundry and loaded the washer. “It seems odd to put a washer and dryer in the kitchen,” he commented as he studied the settings.  “Vitya, I may need a quick translation to understand the settings.”

 

“One moment, my Yuuri.”  Victor added the last of the vegetables to the broth.  Wiping his hands on a towel hanging from the pink strings of his 1950s housewife styled [ apron](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/d7/fa/b3/d7fab36e97783cb157d82f99bda2fa36.jpg) .  Stepping behind Yuuri and translating the settings Victor waited for Yuuri to repeat them back in order, turning on the machine.

 

Turning to face Victor, he slipped his arms around his boyfriend’s neck.  “Where did you find such an apron?”

 

“Yura and I exchanged gag gifts and this was mine.  Oddly, my gift to him was also an apron but with animal prints.”

 

“I bet that made him happy,” Yuuri commented with an amused raise of the eyebrow.

 

“It did but after that, I started collecting glam aprons,” Victor continued opening a door that held several aprons hanging on hooks. 

 

Yuuri ran his fingers along some of the styles before commenting, “Please tell me you have shoes tucked away for some of these.”

 

“Sadly, I haven’t your talent for heels.  Although, now I’m wanting to see you dressed out…we should go shopping!”

 

Yuuri shook his head.  “Nuh-uh.  Not while he’s here.”

 

Victor nodded resignedly.  “I understand…perhaps in celebration of him moving out,” Victor suggested.

 

The discussed third party arrived an hour later as Victor was serving up dinner.  “Your timing is perfect,” Victor commented ignoring Yuuri rolling his eyes. 

 

Sasha chuckled.  “I was out on business.  I didn’t expect it to run so late or I would have been here to help.  It looks like you’ve done the cooking and cleaning.”

 

“Yuuri and I always work together to balance out the workload,” Victor stated quietly.  Serving up their meal into bowls, he placed them on the table. 

 

“Oh, what a healthy meal!” Sasha commented.

 

“Yuuri and I are in training,” Victor returned.  “High caloric meals are reserved for celebrations.  You know this.”  He spotted Yuuri rolling his eyes once more.

 

As they ate, Victor asked Sasha about his day. 

 

“I just finished meeting with a gallery owner.  He’s featuring several pieces in his next show so I’m quite excited.  I also picked up another commission this morning.”

 

“This should make it easier for you to find a place,” Victor pointed out.

 

Sasha shrugged.  “In a way it will.  I’ll have more money to work with but I’ll also have to dedicate more time to work on the pieces.”

 

Yuuri’s spoon clattered against the side of the bowl and Victor’s jaw tightened.  “I see,” the older Russian responded.

 

“I am scheduled to look at another place tomorrow morning,” the artist placated, looking from one to the other.

 

Their meal wrapped up and Yuuri stood with his bowl to take to the sink.  “I’ll take that,” Sasha offered as he reached out his hand, running it down Yuuri’s forearm to take the dish. 

Yuuri’s eyes went wide and the dish dropped to the floor shattering and setting the dogs off. Cocoa planted herself at Yuuri’s feet immediately.  Victor jumped up wrapping his arm around Yuuri and pulling him back from the commotion.  

 

Yuuri’s breathing hitched, exhaling raggedly.  Victor gathered Yuuri to him and guided him to the bedroom closing the door.  “Breathe with me Yuuri.”  Victor stood before him, his eyes wide with concern as Yuuri continued to gasp.    “Come on, Yuuri.  You can do this.  It’s a panic attack.  Remember what we do.  Breathe in deeply with me.  Now exhale slowly.  In once more.  Now out.  Let’s ground.  Five things you see.”

 

“Vitya...blue eyes...lips...apron...hands.”  He gasped for air between each word, his eyes still wide with panic.

 

“Good,” Victor soothed.  “Short answers are fine.  Four things you feel.”

 

Yuuri focused on his surroundings.  “Cotton on my sleeve.  My skin.  Your breathing.  Ummm.  The air moving from the fan.”

 

“You’re doing great,” Victor continued encouraging.  “Now give me three things you hear.”

 

“Your voice.  The fan.”  Yuuri’s breath hitched again.  “Glass falling, hitting the floor shattering.”  Yuuri’s breathing became panicked once more as the room seemed to disappear around him.

 

“Talk to me, Yuuri.  What’s happening?” Victor implored seeking to ground him, to pull him back.

 

“When I was there…th-they knocked over a vase or maybe a coffee pot.  I heard the glass shattering before the drug completely locked me up.  I…I need to get them off of me, Victor.  Help me.”   Yuuri’s eyes were no longer focused on the room as he started to struggle. 

 

“You’re safe now, Yuuri.  I’m here with you,” Victor soothed.

 

Tears fell as he stuttered, “I-I can feel them.”

 

“Do you want to shower?” Victor suggested as he guided Yuuri towards the bathroom.

 

“Y-yes…wash them off me.”  Yuuri allowed Victor to lead him into the room.

 

Victor led Yuuri to the bathroom and undressed his boyfriend with great care.  “I’m going to take care of you, Yuuri.  Do you trust me?”

 

Yuuri nodded but his eyes remained unfocused as he stood before the Russian holding his elbow with his opposite hand, his body drawing in to make him smaller.  Victor set the taps and undressed to accompany the younger man into the shower.  Once all was set, he carefully drew his lover into the space.  “I’m going to wash you, Yuuri.  Is that okay?”

 

“Yes.  Get them off me,” Yuuri pleaded in whisper, a whine slipping through his voice.

 

Victor soaped up the wet cloth and then gently began to wash the other man’s skin.  He was thorough, making sure he covered the entire surface before he rinsed him off.   Reaching over to turn off the taps, he reached for a towel to dry them both off.  Carefully wrapping Yuuri in an oversized fuzzy robe, he guided the younger man into the bedroom and settled him onto the bed before pulling out the soft fabrics Yuuri craved after a panic attack.  He soon had Yuuri dressed and tucked in, following him shortly after dressing himself. 

 

Yuuri curled up in his arms and trembled as Victor soothed him, rubbing circles into the tense muscles of his back.  “I’ve got you, Yuuri.  You’re safe.  I won’t let anyone hurt you,  _ lyubov moya _ .”

 

Yuuri finally settled down as his breathing evened out, letting Victor know he was sleeping.  Slipping from the blankets, the older man opened the door and called the dogs.  “Go watch Yuuri,” he commanded knowing they would lie on either side of Yuuri protectively but not disturb him.  Entering the living room, he closed the door turning to face Sasha.

 

“I cleaned up the kitchen.  Is he okay?” Sasha asked, his voice sounding concerned.

 

Victor narrowed his eyes as he faced the other man.  “I’ve been trying to figure out what’s been setting off his anxiety around you.  Then I saw it.  You touched him.  Without his permission.  Why would you do that?”

 

“I-I have always been a touchy person,” the younger Russian defended.  “I didn’t even think about it.”

 

“I am a touchy person but I knew to ask permission before I laid my hands on him,” Victor stated, easily brushing aside that defense.  “He was raped.  His walls are higher than an average person.  Do not touch my boyfriend, Sasha.”

 

“Vitya,” Sasha answered in surprise.

 

Victor held up his hand, shutting down any protests.  “I’m serious.  If it happens again, you will find yourself out on the streets.”

 

“I…” Sasha started as he stared at Victor wide-eyed.  He’d never witnessed the tightly held anger in Victor’s demeanor.  “Of course.  I’ll try harder,” he relented.

 

“One stray finger, you’re out,” Victor stated, his voice icy and hard.

 

“I heard you,” Sasha returned, sounding injured.

 

Victor didn’t care at this point.  He turned on his heel and returned to his room securing the door behind him.  Urging Makka over, he found his spot next to Yuuri.  Wrapping his arms around his lover, he whispered, “I’m sorry, Yuuri.  I didn’t see what he was doing to you.  I should have been more aware.”

 

Yuuri continued to sleep.  Victor knew the next day would be hard and was glad it was a rest day.  He made a mental list of what Yuuri needed from him.

 

* * *

  
  
  


Yuuri woke haunted by the previous evening seeking affection from Victor as he wormed into him, kissing into his neck.

 

Victor stirred into his arms.  “Yuuriiii,” he murmured, turning into that kiss, seeking Yuuri’s lips with his.  As the kiss broke, he felt Yuuri’s restless fingers reaching for him, rubbing his member through his sleep pants.  “Baby,  _ lyubov moya _ , I don’t know if this is a good idea,” he protested with concern as he pulled Yuuri’s hand away and kissed the fingers.

 

Yuuri’s eyes filled with tears.  “I’m sorry,” he stuttered.  “I just…I need you, Victor.  Please.  Drive away the ghost of them.  Please, Vitya.”

 

Victor’s lips parted in surprise.  Gathering Yuuri into his arms, he murmured next to Yuuri’s ear, “I don’t want to hurt you.  You are upset.”

 

“I know,” Yuuri cried softly.  “I know I’m upset.  I know what happened last night and that I had a panic attack.  I just…please.”

 

Victor drew a ragged breath, resting his forehead against Yuuri’s.  “Are you sure?”

 

Yuuri nodded insistently.  “Yes, please, Vit…”  Victor cut off the name with a kiss crushing Yuuri’s lips in its possession as he rolled the other man on his back, sliding his hand up Yuuri’s shirt to touch the skin underneath.  Yuuri moaned needily into that kiss, his own hands sliding up Victor’s back and shoulders, sliding the shirt over Victor’s head as he released the kiss.  Victor pulled back on his knees to remove Yuuri’s shirt.

 

Yuuri sat up, his hands on the waistband of Victor’s pants, tugging them free of his lover’s hips and finding nothing underneath.  “I dressed in a hurry…” he responded with another kiss “...after settling you into bed,” Victor explained.  “I just wanted to put a barrier in place to make you feel safe as I held you.”

 

“Oh, Vitya…I always feel safe with you,” Yuuri murmured, sliding his arm up and around Victor’s neck.

 

Victor shrugged.  “I love you but I also respect you, Yuuri.  To do less seemed disrespectful at the moment.”

 

“Thank you, Vitya,  _ anata _ ,” he responded tenderly, leaning forward to brush his lips over Victor’s lips.  Victor’s fingers strayed to Yuuri’s hips as the younger man opened up before him, inviting Victor to deepen the kiss.  Sliding his hand up, he dipped them into the waistband and worked Yuuri free of his pants and boxers as he continued to kiss the younger man.  As the kiss broke, they each slipped their pants off and tossed them to the side, coming back together hands, lips and teeth.

 

“How do you want me?” Victor asked as his hand slipped up Yuuri’s cheek, tangling into his hair.

 

“I need you in me,” Yuuri answered, his voice a mix between a plea and a demand.

 

Victor nodded as he guided Yuuri back down onto the bed.  Yuuri opened up his legs at the slightest touch of Victor’s hands on his inner thigh.  Reaching for the lube on the nightstand, he began to carefully open Yuuri up, his free hand reaching for Yuuri’s shaft, stroking more needy moans from the younger man.

 

Withdrawing his hand, he leaned forward to kiss Yuuri once more as he prepared to enter the younger man when Yuuri seemed to have other ideas and flipped them.  As Victor stared up at him startled, finally saying, “So it’s like that, is it?”

 

Yuuri nodded.  “I need to have control,” Yuuri stated even as he reached down to line them up and slowly sink down onto Victor’s cock.  Victor closed his eyes to focus on holding himself together as Yuuri seemed determined to take him in one excruciatingly slow motion.  As Yuuri settled down, he took several breaths as he waited for his body to become used to the fullness.  Victor’s eyes opened and met his, nodding that he was ready.  Yuuri leaned forward to brush a kiss over Victor’s lips as he began to slide up Victor’s shaft then back down again.  He shifted his position then slid back up again.  As he dropped once more, he found it, his eyes widening.

 

Victor’s hands rested on Yuuri’s hips as the man began the slow rise and then forceful drops.  Yuuri slid his hands over Victor’s. The rhythm started to increase in tempo and then Victor’s eyes widened when he felt Yuuri add a twist and as he dropped down, they both released a moan.  Yuuri continued that motion, in and out, gyrating just right, pulling out those delicious sounds from Victor.  Victor met his downward fall with an upward thrust, their bodies responding to the other’s demand just like on the dancefloor.

 

“Vitya…” Yuuri cried out in repeated intervals.  Victor echoed with “Yuuri!” sliding it between the moans and cries.  Completely unaware of anyone outside of that room, their bodies slapping together with increasing demand, their cries coming closer together.

 

Yuuri tightened his hands on the other man’s.  “I’m coming!” he cried out as he started releasing untouched, the tightening of his walls along with the continuing crashing rhythm of Yuuri milked out Victor’s release.

 

As Yuuri dropped down into Victor’s arms, the older man wrapped him up.  “My beautiful Yuuri,” he breathed against his skin.  “I’ve never...not without a condom.”

 

Yuuri laid there catching his breath before finally speaking.  “I wanted to feel you in me and I knew we both tested clean.  How does...it feel?”

 

“Directly inside you?  Amazing.  I had a hard time holding it together, though.  Especially at first.”

 

“I didn’t give you a chance to acclimate.  I didn’t even think about that.  I just needed to feel the fullness of you in me.”

 

“Come, Yuuri.  Let’s shower and get you cleaned up.”  He slipped from the blankets and Yuuri stumbled after, reaching for Victor to steady him.  “I’ve got you, love,” he murmured as he slipped an arm around Yuuri’s waist.

 

Soon, Yuuri found himself guided under the inviting warmth of the shower as Victor tended him.  “Thank you,” he murmured, causing Victor to pause in his ministrations and look into his eyes.  “You always take care of me.”

 

“I love you,” Victor stated firmly.  “I can’t  _ not  _ take care of you.”  He dropped his forehead to Yuuri’s before tilting the younger man’s chin and capturing a kiss.  “You are my reason for living, my life, my love.”

 

“I worry that I don’t take good enough care of you,” Yuuri returned.  “Sometimes...my mental illness has me focused too much on myself.”

 

“One of the ways you can love me is by taking care of yourself.  That was one thing Sasaki-sensei stressed to me.  I have to take care of myself in order to be a good caregiver.  It’s not selfishness.  It’s making sure I’m there when you need me.”

 

“I-I didn’t know that,” Yuuri murmured.

 

Victor brushed another kiss over Yuuri’s lips before continuing to wash him.  Turning off the shower, he wrapped Yuuri in a towel and dried him thoroughly before settling him on the toilet and tending to himself.  “Do you want clothes?” he asked.  Yuuri answered with a shake of his head.

 

Yuuri crawled back across the bed and pulled the covers up.  Victor settled Yuuri next to him, cradling his head on his shoulder.  “I am so lucky to have you, my Yuuri,” he murmured as he brushed his lips against the younger man’s head.

 

“Mmmm, I’m the lucky one,” Yuuri murmured as he snuggled closer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Goodness! Are we on pins and needles with this roommate situation?


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Guess who comes to dinner!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, BluSkates, for your lovely edits. Thank you, Magrathea, for reading through this and keeping me on track.

* * *

 

Victor and Yuuri slept in late the next morning, lingering in bed wound up in one another as they stole kisses and burrowed under the blankets.  They finally broke free of their covers, Victor first while Yuuri laid stretching and teasing the curls in each of their dogs.  Victor emerged from the bathroom and managed to snatch his phone to snap a picture before a suspecting Yuuri could move.  “I had best not see that on Instagram,” Yuuri warned.

 

“Why not?” Victor pouted.

 

Yuuri raised an eyebrow then motioned towards his state of undress.

 

Victor chuckled.  “All of the good stuff is covered.  Besides, I’m saving this for my private collection.”

 

“You have a private collection,” Yuuri deadpanned.

 

“Yes.  It’s all Yuuri.  It helps me to find my smile sooner when I am a little lost,” he confessed with a sheepish shrug.

 

Yuuri remained speechless, color rising up in his cheeks.  Finally finding his voice, he pushed up out of bed.  “I guess I’ll just…” he began, motioning towards the bathroom.

 

Victor walked out of the bedroom and found the rest of the apartment deserted.  A note on the counter stated that Sasha was looking at an apartment and included an apology for last night’s _misunderstanding_.  Victor wadded it up before pulling down Yuuri’s mug.  He focused first on preparing a cup of tea for his lover.  Then he set the coffee pot in motion.  Once the rice began to cook, Victor set the table for two.  He looked up with a smile when he spotted his Yuuri emerging from their room.  “My clothes today,” he observed with a raised eyebrow.

 

Yuuri shrugged, dropping his head down.  “I needed the soft fabrics.”

 

“We are going to go out and getting you your own today.  If you are up for it?”

 

“I…suppose I could.  I just don’t want to…” he paused looking around.  “Where is he?”

 

“Out looking at an apartment.”

 

“So we can avoid him until we leave perhaps?”

 

“Yes.  We’ll take the dogs with us.  The shops I’m going to take you to will be familiar with Makka and Cocoa won’t be a problem.”

 

“Are we walking?”

 

“No, driving,” Victor supplied.  “Here’s your tea, love.”

 

Yuuri wrapped his hands around the mug and breathed in the steam before taking a sip.  “Mmmm, thank you,” Yuuri responded.

 

* * *

  
  


“I didn’t know you had a car,” Yuuri commented as he climbed into the passenger seat.  “It’s not…what I expected.”

 

“Well, the pink Porsche is in the shop,” Victor teased as he settled into the luxurious interior.  “No, I lease.  When I turned my other in last December, I wasn’t sure what was going to happen.  So I held back on picking out a new one.  It only took a phone call to arrange for this one and they had it here within a couple of days.  I had to get the key from Yakov, though.”

 

The leather interior of the black Mercedes held an understated quality.  Glancing into the back seat where Cocoa rested on a dog blanket while Makka sat up looking out the window, Yuuri could see it had enough room for both dogs to ride in comfortably.  In a pinch, they could even squeeze Yuri into the mix.  “Do you drive a lot?”

 

“Enough to warrant a car.  I chose the SUV because sometimes the roads are difficult to navigate in the winter.  Do you drive, Yuuri?”

 

Yuuri shrugged.  “Only when I have to…I get anxious behind the wheel.  I could probably grow comfortable driving in our neighborhood or outside of the city but heavy traffic can send me into a panic.  Mari or Otousan usually did the driving for the inn.  Phichit drove in Detroit…although that was a different sort of anxiety.”

 

“I’ll keep that in mind.”

 

“I don’t mind public transportation.  I just need to brush up on my Russian.”

 

“You never speak it.  I sometimes forget that you studied it as well as French.”

 

“I read it better than I speak it.  I’m not certain of some of the pronunciation and have avoided butchering it in front of you,” Yuuri confessed.

 

Victor glanced his way with a warm smile.  “You must practice it.  We will all help you!  It will make it much easier to move around the city.”

 

“You’re right, I know…but, well…I’m not sure I’m comfortable straying too far from people I know in Russia.  Not after…well, not after Sochi.”

 

Victor dropped his smile and nodded.  “I understand and that’s a good point but I don’t want you to feel hemmed in, either.  We need to find a happy medium.  Besides, knowing the language will keep you from feeling outside of the conversations.”

 

“Did you feel that way in Japan?”

 

Victor shrugged.  “Sometimes.  Most of your friends spoke English and your parents always made an effort.  I also pick up languages easily.  When did you start learning Russian?”

 

“When some of the Victor Nikiforov memorabilia only came in Russian,” Yuuri confessed as heat rose up his cheeks.

 

Victor chuckled.  “I didn’t think about that.  So…I am learning Japanese because of a beautiful Japanese boy that danced into my life…and you learned Russian to follow me.”

 

“Yes…they called you the Russian Darling back then.”

 

“I hated that title…almost as much as Yura hates being called the Russian Fairy.  Yes, I capitalized on my femininity at that time but I did not want it to become my identity.”

 

“So you are not genderfluid?”

 

Victor shrugged.  “I don’t mind dressing in drag but I tend towards the masculine side.”

 

“I…like both,” Yuuri murmured.

 

Victor smiled thoughtfully as he negotiated through traffic.  “I like both with you as well and all of the gray areas in between.  I want you to be able to express whichever side you choose comfortably, masculine or feminine.”

 

“I….thank you, Vitya.  I thought perhaps…you saw it as a persona, like a costume.”

 

“I would have if I hadn’t found your shoe collection.  You don’t turn that feminine side on very often.”

 

“In Eros, I do…”

 

“But that could still be a persona.  You…are private about it…like it’s a secret.”

 

Yuuri tightened his lips.  “I suppose…I struggled with acceptance among my peers so much that I didn’t want to rock the boat.”

 

“Just know that I accept you as you are and you have several very good friends that will also.”

 

“Well, Phichit and Chris,” Yuuri murmured.

 

“And Yura, in spite of his complaints, as well as Mila.  Georgi is the makeup king so you know he will accept and support you in your expression.  I can’t really think of anyone at the rink that would not support you.”

 

Yuuri smiled to himself as he leaned back.  “Today, though, just comfort clothes.”

 

“Of course.  So you don’t want me to have you fitted for a new suit,” Victor confirmed teasingly.

 

“God, no!” Yuuri protested winning a chuckle from his boyfriend.

 

As he pulled into the parking spot before the store, Victor placed a stilling hand on Yuuri to keep him in place.  “I talked to Sasha last night.”  Yuuri stared straight ahead out the window.  Victor continued, “I told him to never touch you again.  I’m sorry, Yuuri.  I didn’t know, I didn’t realize he was crossing those lines with you.  I wish…you felt comfortable enough to tell me.”

 

Yuuri was silent for a  few minutes before he spoke quietly.  “They were all such little things.  Alone, they seemed benign.  Just small inconsiderations.  But together…I didn’t know what to say.  It sounded…silly in my head.  Too small.”

 

“Even if it seems inconsequential, I want you to tell me.  I promise to listen, to not brush off your discomfort.”

 

“Thank you, Vitya.  I hate to put you in the middle between your friend and myself.”

 

“I’m not in the middle, not when it comes to you.  I will always choose you, Yuuri.  I hope you know that.”

 

Yuuri smiled, his expression softening.  “Thank you, Vitya.”  Victor placed a restraining hand on Yuuri once more as Yuuri reached to open the door.   Victor walked around and opened it for him, taking his hand and helping him out of the SUV.  Leashes in hand, they gathered the dogs and prepared for their shopping.

 

Victor led Yuuri, fingers laced together, into the shop.  A salesman approached and addressed Victor by name.  “Alec!” Victor returned.  “Are you the one serving us today?”

 

“Yes, I was told that you needed someone who could work with very specific needs.”

 

“I called in advance to make the arrangements.” Victor explained quickly, then turned back to the other Russian man.  “This is my Yuuri,” he introduced.  “Yuuri, Alec is one of my favorite sales associates.  He’ll help us find everything you need.”

 

“Oh, okay.  Nice to meet you.  I don’t really know what I need.”  Yuuri looked towards Victor uncertainly.

 

Victor placed a reassuring hand on Yuuri’s back.  “He’s taking over my closet as he’s gained a preference for finer fabrics.  Today we are focusing on comfort clothes, casual and relaxed.  All soft fabrics.”

 

Alec greeted Yuuri warmly as he guided them into a fitting room.  “What can you tell me about your personal style, Yuuri?”

 

Yuuri ran his hand behind his neck.  “I’m an athlete,” he finally supplied.  “When I come home, I like to dress down.  Jeans, t-shirts, sweaters, Victor has these soft sweatpants I really like, pajamas.  Understated.”

 

“Any color preferences?”

 

“Darker colors, like winter? And shades of gray.”

 

“That should help.  I would like to take some measurements so that I can size you properly then we’ll bring you several things to try on.”

 

It wasn’t long before Yuuri was picking from the different things brought to him in shades of navy, burgundy, maroon, and hunter green, along with grays and blacks.  Yuuri sorted through them, tried things on and made a stack of things he liked, discarding the things he didn’t care for.  Soon, he had a number of items and started to pick through them when Victor wrapped his arms around him from behind.

 

“No, Yuuri.  You will take them all,” Victor insisted.

 

“It’s too much,” he protested.

 

Victor shook his head.  “No.  We are going to get rid of everything in your wardrobe that does not feel good against your skin.  Sasaki-sensei insisted that you indulge in this one area because it will help reduce part of your anxiety.”

 

“I think you are stretching her statement to mean more than she intended.”

 

“I think you are downplaying it.  You need an update in your wardrobe and these things make you feel comfortable.  We are getting them.”

 

Yuuri didn’t look at the price as they were rung up.  Victor handled the bill and the packages were loaded into the back of the SUV while Yuuri settled the dogs.  As Victor joined him in the front seat, Yuuri tangled his fingers in Victor’s.  “Where to next?”

 

“The supermarket.  I’ve found a couple of places that might have some of the ingredients you would prefer to use, then I’ll take you to the neighborhood market.”

 

Yuuri chuckled.  “Tired of doing all of the cooking already?”

 

Victor leaned across the console to brush a kiss against Yuuri’s forehead.  “I will cook for you every day if that’s what you want, _lyubov moya_.  But I also know that you like to cook and you crave things familiar to you.  So let us shop together and you will know what we have available.”

 

On their final stop, Yuuri’s phone vibrated.  “It’s Yura.  He’s bored.”

 

“Tell him we’ll come by to get him after we finish up here.  We can let him decide who cooks tonight.”

 

Yuuri grinned and sent the text.  “I’ll enjoy spending the evening with Yura.  Thank you.”

 

“Of course.  You seemed to really connect with Yura and Mila.”

 

“I like the others as well but yes, I do seem to like them best.  I noticed that you gravitate towards Ivan and Dmitry.”

 

“I’ve known them for the longest time.  Georgi is fine but he’s so dramatic that I sometimes keep a little distance.  However, if I need him, he’s there.  I’m not just too fond of Anya, his newest girlfriend.  She’s a bit of a snob.”

 

“She’s the one that was too good to hang out with Yura and Mila.  Yeah, I’m not too crazy about her either.”

 

“Her brother Alexei isn’t bad.  And Mila’s sister Katya is kind of like team counselor, team mom.”

 

“Who is team dad?”

 

Victor’s lip flicked upward.  “Pyotr.  He’s a year younger than me and very level headed.  I hate that an injury forced him into retirement.  It’s appropriate that they are Mom and Dad.  They are seeing one another.  It wouldn’t surprise me if they were married after Katya retires.”

 

Yuuri twisted his toe uncertainly.  “How do you feel about marriage?”

 

Victor frowned.  “I had never really considered it until a certain brunette danced into my life.  Now, I crave anything that keeps us together.  I want what makes you happy, though, Yuuri.”

 

They loaded the last of the groceries into the SUV and climbed inside, settling the dogs into the back seat.  Yuuri contemplated his next words as Victor put on his seatbelt.  “I never thought it would be an option for me,” Yuuri confessed.

 

“Why wouldn’t it be an option?”

 

“With my anxiety, I didn’t think I would find anyone who could push past it.  I mean, I dreamed of…well, I wanted you since I was twelve.  I never thought you’d want me back.  I never expected you to give me a second glance.”

 

“Oh, my Yuuri.  You underestimate yourself.  You do not notice all the second glances you receive.”

 

“They are looking at you,” Yuuri protested.

 

Victor shook his head insistently.  “No, _solnyshko_ , they are not.  I’ve had to stare more than a few down to get their eyes off of you.  Besides, I have it on authority that Yura would steal you away if I fuck it up with you.”

 

Yuuri laughed.  “I’m sure he said it pretty much that way.”

 

Victor shrugged.  “He doesn’t let very many in close.  But he craves love.  His mama abandoned him to his grandfather.  I…suppose I understand that loneliness he carries on his shoulders.  He fights everyone, though, afraid to let them get close and suffer that abandonment again.  The fact that he lets you in tells me that he trusts you not to hurt him.”

 

Yuuri studied the road in front of them as he put his words together.  “I will endeavor to not break that trust.  I feel…protective over him.”

 

“Like a brother,” Victor suggested.

 

Yuuri frowned before slowly shaking his head.  “Honestly, more like a parent.  I want to take care of him and make sure he’s safe.”

 

A smile played at Victor’s lips.  “I’d be lying if I said I didn’t feel the same.  He’s been part of my family, all bristles and claws, since he came to us at age eleven.  I’ve watched over him for all of that time.  I understand why he was so angry when I left.  I regretted the hurt I caused him.  I was…another person that abandoned him.”

 

“What does he do during off season?”

 

“It depends on his grandfather.  If he’s in good health, Yura stays with him.  When he’s not well, Yura stays with Yakov and at the dorms.”

 

“Perhaps…he can join us in Japan.  We can work on our choreography and programs together.”

 

Victor smiled.  “I’d like that…a lot.  Let’s see how his year winds up.”

 

They pulled into the parking lot by the dorms and Yuuri texted to let him know they were there.  They raised an eyebrow to see the blond coming out of the building with an overnight bag.  As he climbed into the SUV, Victor asked, “Are you spending the night?”

 

“Unless you want to bring me back home later.  You have room, don’t you?”

 

“Of course, Yura.  You’ll have to sleep on the couch, though.”

 

The blond shrugged.  “Not the first time.”

 

* * *

  
  


Yuri chose Japanese food and Yuuri began preparing the[ salmon](http://www.eatingwell.com/recipe/248411/broiled-salmon-with-miso-glaze/) for the broiler.   Edamame was given the sesame seed treatment.  Then he assembled the spinach [ salad](http://www.eatingwell.com/recipe/252932/spinach-salad-with-japanese-ginger-dressing/) topping it off with a ginger dressing.  Sasha arrived not too long before dinner was ready but remained subdued either due to Victor’s anger the previous evening or Yuri’s presence.

 

Yuri took a bite and fell back into his chair with a happy expression.  “It’s not katsudon but I suppose that’s too much for a daily meal.”

 

Yuuri chuckled.  “No, I only make it for celebrations.  Too many calories.  This ends up around 470 calories but low carb.”

 

“Are you restricted on carbs?” Yuri asked.

 

The Japanese man nodded.  “During training, I allow myself a half a cup of rice in the morning with my eggs and a light serving at lunch.  I rarely allow it at dinner.”

 

“What’s the glaze on this salmon?” Victor asked as he savored another bite.

 

“Miso.  I was glad that we found it as we shopped today because I can use it in a number of recipes.”

 

“Well, this one must be repeated,” Victor complemented.

 

Sasha nodded.  “Yes, very good.”

 

Yuuri blushed under their praise.  Yuri watched Sasha’s eyes linger a little too long on his friend.  He flicked his eyes to Victor and could tell Victor wasn’t happy either.  Sasha volunteered to clean up and the three skaters retreated to the living room to watch television and discuss the upcoming Grand Prix competition.

 

Yuri yawned leading to a series of yawns by the others.  “I suppose I should gather your bedding,” Victor volunteered heading towards the bedroom.

 

Sasha stood watching Yuuri as the other two continued talking another moment before Yuuri tugged on the blond’s hand to lead him into the bedroom.  Victor glanced up on their entrance.  “Everything okay?”

 

Yuuri shrugged as he stretched out to rest his head on Cocoa tangling his fingers into her fur.

 

Yuri wasn’t so quiet.  “That Sasha is creepy,” he stated outright.

 

Yuuri shifted uncomfortably and Victor thinned his lips.  “Did he touch you?”

 

“N-no,” Yuuri stated.  “He just…he keeps watching me.”

 

Victor nodded.  “I was noticing that, too.”

 

Yuri looked from one to the other.  “He touched you?” he asked, jumping up from the edge of the bed ready to kick the man’s ass.  Yuuri placed a staying hand on the blond.  “Yuuri, did he hurt you?”

 

“He didn’t exactly hurt me.  He…just doesn’t respect my boundaries.  And he’d touch me from time to time on the arm…like this.”  Yuuri slid his hand down Yuri’s arm in demonstration.

 

Yuri jerked his arm away, his eyes wide.  “That’s fucking messed up!”

 

“I’ve warned him if he touches Yuuri one more time he’s on the streets without exception,” Victor stated.  “After tonight, though, I am leaning towards giving him a deadline to be out.”

 

“So I’m not overreacting?” Yuuri asked looking from one to the other.

 

Yuri shook his head insistently.  Victor thinned his lips before shaking his head as well.  “I’ve never seen him act this way.  I don’t know what his deal is and at this point, I don’t give a damn.  I want him away from you.”

 

“Oh.  I thought…maybe it was my anxiety.”  Yuuri studied the hand buried into Cocoa’s fur.

 

The two Russians exchanged glances.  Victor sat down next to Yuuri, taking the smaller hand into his.  “I wasn’t sure at first myself until I observed his behavior towards you.  Perhaps he was more discrete at first and now is becoming bolder.  But I want him out as well.”

 

Yuuri nodded, his nervousness and stress carrying through their joined hands as Yuuri loosened and tightened his grip.

 

The blond gathered the blankets Victor gathered for him.  “I can make up my own bed, Vitya.  You stay with him.”

 

“Thanks, Yura.  Sleep well,” he answered.

 

Yuuri echoed, “Good night.”  As the door shut behind Yuri, the brunette lifted his eyes to Victor.  “Do you have that referral Sasaki-sensei gave us?”

 

“Yes.  I’ll make the call tomorrow and set up an appointment.”

 

“Thank you.  I think…I need to work through these mixed up emotions.”

 

“I’m sorry…I haven’t been what you needed.”

 

Yuuri squeezed his hand, this time more firmly.  “You are always what I need, Vitya.  I haven’t been communicating well.  You are right.  A lot of what he did was when you weren’t looking.”

 

Victor settled Yuuri into bed and kissed his forehead.  “I’m going to take the dogs out and then I want to hold you all night.”

 

Yuuri nodded.  “I…thank you.  I need you in  my arms.”

 

When Victor returned to their bed, Yuuri wound up into his embrace.  “Vitya?”

 

“Yes, _lyubov moya_.”

 

“When you make an appointment for me, please include yourself.  I worry when you get sad like yesterday.”

 

“I will, my Yuuri.  I will.”  Victor tangled up into his lover and chased after sleep but his mind was too active to fully give into its embrace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You can never go wrong with an angry kitten. ;)


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Someone's getting salty!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay...so remember, they've only been in Russia maybe a week or so at this point.
> 
>  
> 
> Thanks for the fast edits, Blu, and the great comments, Mag. <3 Den

* * *

 

Yuri stirred on the couch as he heard someone walking through the space.  Waking and sitting up, he spotted Sasha filling a glass of water.  It was only an hour after everyone had gone to bed, and now Sasha was walking around the flat.  Narrowing his eyes, the little blonde started to say something snarky. However, he knew Yuuri well enough to know that conflict would only make the Japanese brunette more agitated.  He sighed, picking up his phone and flicking through his social media updates.

 

“Oh, did I disturb you?” Sasha asked as he walked back through the living room.

 

Yuri narrowed his green eyes as he looked at the unwanted party.  “I guess you could say that,” he stated.

 

The older man started at such a direct response.  “My apologies.  I was just…thirsty.”  He lifted his glass as if demonstrating his purpose.

 

“Uh huh,” the youth responded, disbelief clear in his voice.

 

Sasha glanced towards Victor’s door then back to the boy.  “I guess I’ll go back to bed.”

 

As Sasha reached the hall that led to the second bedroom and bathroom, Yuri asked him, “Do you do that a lot?”

 

Sasha turned, confused.  “What do you mean?”

 

“Come into the living room after everyone has gone to bed.”

 

Sasha looked taken aback.  “I live here,” he answered.

 

“You are  _ staying  _ here,” Yuri corrected.  “You do not live here.  You are supposed to be finding another place to stay.”

 

“This is none of your business,” Sasha stated.

 

The kitten shrugged.  “Maybe it’s not, but those two are some of my closest friends.  I’d hate to see them hurt.”  There was a glint to his eyes and an edge to his voice.

 

Sasha stared at the kid for a moment before deciding to shrug it off.  He disappeared down the hall.   _ At least he’ll stay in there for the night _ , Yuri thought to himself.  Then glancing back at the door, he thought of Yuuri.   _ Don’t be mad.   It had to be said. _

  
  
  


* * *

 

The next morning the skaters were out before Sasha emerged from his room.  “Did you sleep well?” Yuuri asked the blonde as they left the apartment.  They paused while Victor dealt with Makkachin’s leash.  Cocoa sat next to Yuuri well behaved and staring judgmentally towards the older poodle.

 

“Yeah, sure.  Hey, Yuuri?”

 

“Yes?” Yuuri asked, reaching down to scratch Cocoa’s head.

 

“You know…if you need to get away for a day or two, you can stay at my place don’t you?”

 

Yuuri looked up with a smile.  “Thank you, Yura.  I don’t plan on letting him drive me from my home.”

 

“What about the big dweeb?” the blonde pointed out nodding towards Victor, still wrestling with an unruly Makka.

 

“Hey!  I can hear you,” Victor protested without turning.

 

Yuri raised his eyebrows.  “Yet you knew who I meant.  Point made.”

 

Yuuri chuckled.  “Thank you for the offer.  I’ll keep it in mind.”

 

Victor caught up to them.  “Quit trying to steal my boyfriend,” he chastised teasingly.

 

“Like I could spend two minutes in that role!  You two are gross!”

 

They laughed in response, each throwing a free arm around the blonde as they walked towards the rink.

 

* * *

  
  


Yuuri arrived returned to his apartment after having lunch with the team.   _ Hopefully Sasha is out for the day _ .  Entering the apartment, he looked around for signs of life and, finding none, breathed a sigh of relief.  Tossing his keys on the counter, he went to the refrigerator and refilled his water bottle before setting it on the table.  Yakov had pressed the paperwork into his hands to fill out in order to train in their facilities as part of his visa requirements but the information he needed was in the piles of paperwork he had brought from Japan.  He laid the papers on the table and disappeared into the bedroom.

 

It didn’t take long for him to find what he needed.  Phichit often described him as organized chaos.  He might have things in some semblance of disarray but he knew, pretty much, where everything was located.  His friend tried to organize his space for him once and Yuuri couldn’t find anything for months.  After that, Phichit left him alone.  Returning to his chair, he pulled his knee up in front of him.  Victor would fuss.  He didn’t like feet on the furniture.  However, Yuuri had a bad skate, and was in a pretty much  _ fuck it _ mood after biting the ice repeatedly.

 

He began working through the documents.  Most of which he could read, but there were some forms that would require Victor’s help.   The Russian would come home in a couple of hours to take him to the attorney’s office to file the forms.  Yuuri flagged them with little sticky notes and moved on through the set of legal documents.   _ Basic information, purpose for stay in country, sponsor information.  Oh, I’ll need Vitya’s legal information here. _  Pulling out his phone, he texted Victor telling him he needed more information from him than he thought originally. He didn’t want to fill out the forms in front of the lawyer and look foolish.

 

The door opened and Yuuri looked up sharply.  His eyes met Sasha’s as the other man entered the apartment.  “Hello, Yuuri,” the other man sing-songed.

 

Yuuri’s lips thinned.  “Oh, hi.  I thought you were out apartment hunting.”

 

“No.  I just needed to get something from storage,” he responded.

 

Studying the paper before him, he said under his breath, “That wouldn’t be a problem if you had your own space.”

 

Sasha blinked in surprise.  He hadn’t seen this side of Yuuri and it took him off guard.  “I have a lead to one.  I’m supposed to look at it tomorrow.”

 

“I’ve heard that before,” Yuuri muttered.

 

Sasha narrowed his brow, suddenly the sweet singing voice was gone.  “Do we have a problem here?”

 

Yuuri looked up and met his eyes.  “No, not at all.  I just thought I could come home and get this paperwork finished in peace and quiet as I’m filtering it through more than one language.  However, that doesn’t seem to be the case.  So let me stop now and focus on you.”

 

“Wow.  I guess you keep your bitchy side under wraps when the boyfriend is here,” he returned.

 

Yuuri rolled his eyes.  “Trust me.  Victor has seen all of my sides.”

 

“Maybe I should leave and come back later.”  Sasha picked up his jacket and headed towards the door.

 

“While you’re out, pick up a paper and see if you can find the apartment listings,” Yuuri quipped as Sasha stepped through the door.  He heard it slam in the other man’s wake.  Yuuri winced.  His mother once told him that the joy having the last word means also having the regret of having the last word.  Picking up his phone, he started to text Victor and stuttered.

 

**Yuuri/ Peach, I fucked up.**

 

It took a couple of moments to receive a reply.

 

**Phichit/ What happened?**

 

**Yuuri/ I sorta told Sasha that he needs to figure out how to find the apartment listings in a newspaper?**

 

Yuuri stared at the phone waiting for a response.  Finally, Phichit responded.

 

**Phichit/ I’m sorry.  So many emotions.  I’m laughing.  I’m proud of you for standing up for yourself.  And damn, Yuuri, what did he do to bring out the inner bitch in you?**

 

**Yuuri/ He came home.  I was working on paperwork for my visa.  And I didn’t want him here.**

 

**Yuuri/ I’m a horrible person.**

 

**Phichit/ You aren’t a horrible person.**

 

**Yuuri/ I was cruel.  And I’m never cruel.**

 

**Phichit/ You came home expecting some quiet and met the enemy instead.  You lashed out.  It was normal.**

 

**Yuuri/ What am I going to tell Victor?  He’ll hate me.**

 

Yuuri put his hands over his face and started rocking back and forth.  Phichit was taking forever to reply.  Yuuri felt Cocoa’s nose pushing at his thigh.  Looking down he could see the dog noticed his distress and Yuuri began his breathing exercises, forcing himself to calm down.

 

**Phichit/ Took care of it.**

 

Yuuri’s eyes widened.

 

**Yuuri/ What do you mean you took care of it?**

 

**Phichit/ I screenshot our conversation and sent it to Chris.**

 

**Yuuri/ PHICHIT!!!**

 

**Phichit/ He’s taking care of it.**

 

* * *

  
  
  


**Chris/ I think your bf has had enough.**

 

**Victor/ What do you mean?**

 

**Chris/ {Screenshot A}**

 

**Chris/ {Screenshot B}**

 

Victor stared at his phone reading through the conversation with mixed emotions but mostly with a smile on his lips.

 

**Victor/ Yura spent the night.  We had a talk between the three of us.**

 

**Chris/ Oh?**

 

**Victor/ Yes.  We both told Yuuri we believed him.**

 

**Victor/ I’ve got to get that man out of my house.**

 

**Chris/ Finally!**

 

* * *

  
  


Victor arrived at his apartment to find Yuuri worked up.  “Vitya, I don’t know what came over me,” he defended.

 

Victor shushed him and pulled him into his embrace, rubbing soothing circles into the small of his back.  “I think you’ve just had enough.  I’ll give him a deadline tonight to get out.  One week to find a place.  Okay?”

 

“I’m a horrible person,” Yuuri murmured against Victor’s shoulder.

 

“You are never a horrible person.  I am proud of you for standing up for yourself, Yuuri.  I’m sorry I put you in the position to have to but I’m proud of you.”

 

Yuuri sniffed and shifted towards the table.  “Can you help me finish this so we can get it to the attorney’s office before they leave for the day?”

 

“Of course,” Victor answered gently.  They sat next to one another filling out the documents, Victor’s arm wrapped around Yuuri reassuringly.  Once finished, they grabbed Victor’s keys and left to deliver the paperwork.

 

That evening, they returned to find Sasha sulking as he worked on a drawing.  Victor sighed as he watched Yuuri disappear into the bedroom.  “Sasha, this isn’t working.  I need you to move out.”

 

“I haven’t touched him,” Sasha defended.

 

Victor shrugged.  “It doesn’t matter.  Yuuri is preparing for competition and your presence adds undue stress on him.”

 

“I don’t understand what I did.  I’ve only ever been nice to him.”

 

Victor frowned and realized why Yuuri had trouble voicing his concerns.  “Sasha, I’m giving you a week to find a place.  That’s all I can offer.”

 

Sasha stared at the drawing board his eyes swimming.  “I’m sorry, Vitya.  I didn’t mean to overstay my welcome.  I just…I didn’t have anywhere else to go.”

 

“One week, Sasha,” Victor stated firmly.  “Either find an apartment or someone else to stay with.  I know you have other friends.”

 

“You know this is bullshit,” Sasha declared lifting his eyes.

 

“Careful, Sasha.  I can throw you out right now,” Victor warned, ice entering his voice.  “You’ve had plenty of time.  Get your shit together and find a place.  One week.”  Victor stood up and walked towards their room, pausing to pick up Yuuri’s keys off the floor by the front door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts?


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Little things, therapy, and an Ed Sheeran obsession.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay...this one isn't all angst. I hope there is some fluff balance.
> 
> Thank you, BluSkates, for editing this. So many hugs for you. Thank you, Magrathea, for the read through.

* * *

 

 

  
  


Victor locked the door as he entered their room.  Yuuri was curled up in bed, the blankets drawn over him.  He could see a tuft of hair and knew that he had Cocoa wrapped up with him.  He did well that day but now he was in a safe place.  He laid the keys on the dresser and Yuuri peaked out.  “What’s that?”

 

“I found your keys in the other room,” Victor stated.

 

Frowning, he muttered, “I can’t believe I was so careless.  I was focused on being alone and able to concentrate on the paperwork.”

 

“It’s fine, Yuuri,” Victor stretched out over the blankets to wrap an arm around Yuuri from behind.  “Do we need to do something?  Your anxiety is kicking in and I can’t tell if it is ‘sleep-it-off’ level or ‘work-it-out’ level.  I hope you aren’t trying to hide it from me.”

 

Yuuri laughed but there was a harsh edge to it.  “What good would that do?  You read me like a book.”

 

Victor frowned.  “I don’t think…I’ve been reading you as well since coming to St. Petersburg.  I’m sorry.”  Remorse threaded his words.

 

“I want it to work.  Your family is here,” Yuuri breathed in frustration and Victor picked out that the edge a moment ago was the beginnings of tears.

 

“I have family here but you are the most important part of my family.  You know that, right?”  He watched as that head slowly nodded, hearing a sniff echo the response.  “I flew halfway around the world to be with you.  I wouldn’t do that for anyone else.  I’d give all of this up for you.  I need you to realize how important you are to me.”

 

“I-I know how important I am to you.  I just…you are important to me, too.  And…you shouldn’t be the only one making sacrifices.  I love you,” Yuuri pushed out, his voice raw.

 

Victor tightened his hold on Yuuri.  “It will get better once he’s out.  I should have been more stern with him from the beginning, before we even arrived.”

 

Yuuri laughed as he rolled into his arms to face him.  A hand reached up and touched his face tenderly.  “Your kindness is one of the things that made me trust you so easily.  This is the other side of that but…I would never have you be anything other than yourself.  I hope you know that.”

 

Victor leaned forward and brushed a kiss against Yuuri’s brow, then nose, before dropping to his lips.  “I am the most myself with you.  I feel more real with you.  The idea of losing that again scares me.”

 

“Being authentic makes us vulnerable,” Yuuri began, placing a finger over Victor’s lips when he started to speak.  “That’s not necessarily a bad thing.  But we will have to learn how to protect it.  To protect us.  Not everyone has our best interests at heart.”

 

“I guess you’re right.  I just…I’ve never been in this situation.  I didn’t know how to react, what to do,” Victor responded.

 

Yuuri lifted his mouth and captured Victor’s lips in a gentle kiss before continuing.  “I may not be confident in how I read a situation.  My anxiety makes me doubt.  When you respond with doubts as well, I start second guessing my instincts.”

 

“I…that could be dangerous.  Especially since…” Victor’s words faded as he realized the implications of Yuuri’s words, of his actions.  “I’m sorry.  I should have known better.  I should have listened to more than your words.  It just stuck in my head that the move would make you anxious and I didn’t allow my thoughts to go past that.  I’ll listen better now.”

 

Yuuri snuggled into him.  “We have counseling appointments tomorrow.  Hopefully they can help us fix whatever went wrong in our communication.  The fault is as much mine as yours, Vitya.  Don’t take it all on yourself.”  As Yuuri curled into the crook of Victor’s neck, he could feel, could hear his stomach growl.  “Well, shit.  Now we have to leave this room.”

 

Victor brushed a kiss against Yuuri’s brow.  “Perhaps but we shouldn’t let him narrow our space.  If he is aggressive, I’ll throw him out sooner.  Okay?”

 

Yuuri frowned as he nodded.  “I think we should lock the bedroom door when we are out, though.”

 

Victor agreed as he rolled out of bed.  Reaching a hand to pull Yuuri free of the bedding, he added, “I’m glad we installed those locks when we arrived.”

 

“It’s my stupid paranoia.  That was the part about my parent’s place that made me struggle the most.”  Yuuri picked up his keys and slid them into his pocket.  “It wasn’t so bad before…but after Sochi, the idea of having a locked door between me and the world is more and more important.”

 

“I always want you to feel safe even if it means we go out of our way so that you will,” Victor confirmed.  “Do you want to stay home and fix supper?”

 

“With his charming company?  He’s likely sulking.”

 

“Out it is.  Shall we call Yuri and Mila?  They might want out of the dorms and we can find a street vendor and head to the park with the dogs.”

 

“That sounds like a perfect idea.”

 

They left with the room dogs in tow, Victor locking the door before pulling it shut behind him discretely.  The other two agreed to meet them at the piroshki stand.  Mila ran towards them exuberantly and started to spill all about the hockey player she was talking to.  Victor exchanged glances with Yuri who rolled his eyes.  Apparently it was old news for the younger man.  Yuuri, on the other hand, listened intently.

 

Mila skipped ahead as they reached the park and Victor leaned towards Yuuri and murmured, “It’ll be someone new next week.”

 

“She’s young.  Let her have her dreams,” Yuuri chastised teasingly.

 

Victor smiled, lips pressed against Yuuri’s hair as the dogs wrapped around them excitedly.  “Maybe hers will come true one day like mine.”

 

Yuuri sighed.  “Hopefully without the nightmares attached to them.”

 

Victor nodded sadly.  Victor worried that their love will always feel somewhat worn and stained by its rocky beginning.

  
  


* * *

  
  


Yakov frowned when Victor informed him that they would be leaving at noon.  “Vitya, this better be important.”

 

“I set up a counseling appointment for Yuuri and I,” Victor stated matter-of-factly.  “The transition...has been difficult.”

 

The old coach sighed.  “I’ve heard the grumbles in the background.  What were you thinking, Vitya, when you allowed that man to stay there?”

 

Victor frowned.  “I was thinking that he was a friend and that he’d try to get out as soon as possible.”

 

“You are too nice, Vitya.  Far too nice.”

 

“I know,” Victor said quietly, his voice trembling.  “I…Yuuri says to be authentic, to be myself.  I can be firm when necessary but being nice is part of who I am.”

 

Yakov shook his head.  “I just don’t like it when you are taken advantage of…you’ve got too big of a heart and when you wear it so openly, it is much easier to break.”

 

Victor shrugged and smiled with an unexpected shyness towards the coach.  “I would rather risk the break then to hurt someone unnecessarily.” 

 

That afternoon, Victor drove them into the city, discussing the recent events and Sasha’s behavior.

 

“He wasn’t like this before,” Victor explained.  “He even supported me when I went to your side.  I don’t know what changed.”

 

“Perhaps it is not meant for us to know,” Yuuri stated.  “We just need to acknowledge our own limits.  We can only be responsible for ourselves.”

 

“I know you’re right, Yuuri.”

 

“I just…I feel like I’m constantly on guard around him.  I’m sorry,” Yuuri murmured. 

 

“I just want you to be comfortable at home,  _ zvezda moya _ ,” Victor returned as he parallel parked.  “We’re here.  Are you ready?”

 

“I…suppose.  I hope we fit together.”

 

“If not, they will refer us.  Sasaki-sensei said as much.  This first meeting is to see if we work well together.”

 

Yuuri nodded.  “What was his name?”

 

“Liezer Abramovich.  He is a psychiatrist.  Sasaki-sensei wanted you to have someone that could handle meds if you needed to go that route.  But she said that he’s also supportive of non-medicated routes.”

 

“I guess we should go inside,” Yuuri stated in resignation.  Victor gave his hand a squeeze.

 

* * *

  
  
  


The man studied them both through his wire rimmed glasses as he pulled at his gray beard,  scanning over the file.  “When Dr. Sasaki contacted me, I didn’t know fully what I’d be dealing with.  I remember watching your interview, though.  You have a few nervous ticks which could be tied to your anxiety.  What is it you are seeking, Mr. Katsuki?”

 

“I was raped and that added to my anxiety meaning I have to establish coping strategies.  I suffer from PTSD and although I am doing well through EMDR, I still have days where things come back to me and we have to go back through the protocols and reinforce the therapy.  I want to establish a rapport with my therapist so that I can work through these difficulties should I be faced with them again.”

 

“I haven’t had a chance to read through this of course,” Dr. Abramovich concluded as he held the thick files Victor and Yuuri brought with them.  “Do you take medications for your anxiety?”

 

“I have Xanax for panic attacks but that leaves me incoherent and zombied out.  I prefer not to use meds at all if possible.  I’m a figure skater and I do not need anything inhibiting my ability to skate.”

 

“And you, Mr. Nikiforov.  Tell me what brings you here.”

 

“I am the one who found my partner.  Because of this I sometimes become hypervigilant and overprotective.  I also have other symptoms of PTSD and something like survivor’s guilt.  I still fight the urge to blame myself for not being there for Yuuri although I am doing better.”

 

“What therapy did you use?”

 

“I also went through EMDR.  We also were involved with another therapist that worked with us as a couple while we dealt with our relationship and intimacy issues.”

 

“Okay, I feel I at least have an overview of the situation.  If you will permit me, I’d like to study your files further before I recommend the next course of therapy.  However, I should tell you a bit about myself.  I may be old but I prefer to think of myself as progressive.  I use a myriad of therapies because what works on one patient does not necessarily work for another.  Therefore, I am always looking at new practices and keeping my skills up to date.  I also like to work with my clients in various settings including individual, couples, and group.  I have met patients at unconventional venues because sometimes you need to meet someone where they are.  You were referred to me because I work with clients who have been involved in major life traumas including rape, war, crime, etc.  I have had a strong success rate and in your case, it appears most of the groundwork has been done.  Any questions?”

 

“I am working through my anxiety.  Can you tell me how you could help me deal with this?”

 

“Although I’m specialized in PTSD cases, I encounter as a result of those cases a number of patients that have anxiety and depression either preexisting or as an after effect of their trauma.  Because you wish to work medication free if possible, we will work with therapies that build up your whole self as well as specific strategies to deal with anxiety events.”

 

“I didn’t mention it earlier but I deal with depression.  Do you have strategies for me as well?”

 

“Of course, Mr. Nikiforov.  I want to read through your records so that I can transition you both smoothly.  However, I think that you will find this clinic to be useful in a number of ways.  We teach several mindfulness and meditative techniques, offering classes along the way.  It will increase your self-awareness and move you into a different mental frame.”

 

Yuuri and Victor exchanged glances.  With Victor’s nod, Yuuri added, “My transition to living in Russia has been particularly difficult.  We currently have someone living with us that makes me uncomfortable.  I’m not sure…but I worry that I’m projecting my anxieties and fears on him.”

 

“How is this person involved with the two of you?”

 

“He’s my ex-boyfriend from four years back,” Victor stated.  “We stayed friendly since then and he’s been my house-sitter and dog-sitter off and on.  Unfortunately, he and his partner broke up as we were preparing to move to Russia.  So he is staying with us until he finds a place to live.  However, he has been acting strangely and making Yuuri uncomfortable.  I’ve given him notice to be out within a week.”

 

“And do you know this person, Mr. Katsuki?”

 

“Not really.  We just met when I arrived in Russia and I’m not great with strangers.”

 

“How does the unease you feel around him manifest?”

 

“He seems to violate my personal space and he unpacked our things.  He has on several occasions touched me without permission.    He asked to…draw my picture.”

 

Victor looked at Yuuri in surprise.

 

“I don’t know…it seems silly when I lay it out but I just don’t feel at ease.”  Yuuri shifted uncomfortably.

 

“Is there somewhere else this man can stay?” suggested the doctor.

 

Victor shrugged.  “He has friends but none of them have offered.”

 

“Perhaps they didn’t feel the need to offer.  Whether or not your partner’s discomfort is tied to his anxiety, his PTSD, or…well, that gut feeling, I worry that this constant sense of unease will set his therapy back.  Have you experienced any nightmares, Mr. Katsuki?”

 

Yuuri drew his expression in and dropped his chin.  Victor reached over and squeezed his hand.  “Yuuri?  Have you been having nightmares?”

 

Yuuri slowly nodded.  “But there is so much…the transition, my rapists are from this country, and then my discomfort with Sasha.  I don’t feel safe.  So, yes, I’ve had nightmares…or sometimes just lie there awake.”

 

Victor studied his boyfriend a long time before releasing a deep sigh.  “I’m sorry, Yuuri.  I need to get him out of the house.  I…If you are too uncomfortable, we can find someone for you to stay with in the meantime.  Yura perhaps.”

 

“I-I don’t want to be run out of my own house,” Yuuri stated firmly.  “As long as it doesn’t get worse, I’d rather stick it out.”

 

“Are you sure?”  Victor stared hard at the smaller man, concern knitting his brow. 

 

Yuuri nodded.  “If I won’t let my rapists take anything from me, do you think I’ll let Sasha?” he challenged.

 

“No…I suppose not.”

 

The therapist listened through this exchange before asking, “Has he threatened you?”

 

“No…that’s why this is so frustrating.  He hasn’t  _ done _ anything.  If anything, he’s been overtly nice but shows a disregard for boundaries, touching me at times on my arm without permission. And I’m very private.  Maybe I’m overreacting.”  Yuuri chewed his lip uncertainly.

 

“Sometimes people rub each other the wrong way and with the addition of anxiety and PTSD, these little instances can be magnified.  That being said, you should never discount your feelings.  Sometimes we pick up on things subconsciously.”  Turning to Victor, he added, “Your partner is not responding well in this environment and I suspect you already knew this.  You need to talk to this other person and arrange for him to stay elsewhere.”

 

“After Yuuri and he got in a fight yesterday, I gave him a deadline to move out.  I knew Yuuri was uncomfortable but I didn’t know that it was giving him nightmares.”

 

Yuuri bit his lower lip.  “I didn’t want to bother you.”

 

“Yuuri.  If you bother no one else, bother me.  I’m your friend, boyfriend, partner, and lover.  It is my job to be bothered by you.”

 

“You weren’t…hearing me.”

 

“I heard you.  I knew you were uncomfortable.  I just didn’t know you were afraid.  I didn’t know you were having nightmares.  I didn’t even know he asked to draw your picture.”

 

“I didn’t think…that it was important.”

 

“If it makes you feel uncomfortable or afraid, it’s important.  Okay?”

 

Yuuri nodded.  “Okay, I’ll be more open and tell you more.”

 

* * *

 

 

Sasha pasted on a smile and faked his way through dinner that evening disappearing shortly after the meal concluded.  As Yuuri stood at the sink washing the dishes, Victor gathered the dogs to take them out for a walk.  Yuuri rinsed the third bowl, when he shivered and began to draw his shoulders in, shrugging in discomfort.  Turning, he spotted Sasha at the counter with his sketch pad.  Zeroing in on that pencil scratching on the surface, Yuuri’s eyebrows raised.  “I hope that’s not me you are drawing.”

 

The man raised a sardonic brow.  “It may surprise you to know that not everything is about you, Yuuri,” he drawled, stretching out Yuuri’s name in a manner similar to Victor but eliciting a chill of a different kind. 

 

Yuuri’s eyes widened, startled by the behavior.  Turning back towards the dishes, he continued the chore.  Apprehension hunched his shoulders and he began to feel an ache between his shoulder blades.  When Victor returned, he turned around and confusion settled into his features as Victor entered the room.

 

“What’s wrong,  _ lyubov moya _ ?” he asked with concern.

 

“Sasha was here sketching just a moment ago and now he is gone.”

 

Victor frowned as he sat on the stool next to the bar.  “He’s not in the living room.  Perhaps he went back to bed.  He’s probably avoiding me after our fight.”

 

“That…could be it.  I just…well, I asked him not to draw me.  I think that was the second or third day we were here.  And well, he seemed to be focused in my direction just now.  I don’t know.   Maybe I’m overreacting.”

 

“Sasha draws what he’s looking at as a general rule.  So if he was looking your direction, you were likely in the picture.  I’ll talk to him again.”  Victor shifted to get up when Yuuri placed a hand on his. 

 

“I’m just done for tonight.  Let’s not start anything new.”

 

Victor frowned and Yuuri could see the doubts in his eyes.  Sighing, he nodded, joining Yuuri at the sink to finish up the dishes.  They retreated to their room after they were finished, to snuggle and read.  The two dogs bounded up onto the bed beside them and Yuuri found his hand burying in Cocoa’s fur.

 

“Did you lock the door?” Yuuri asked suddenly as he laid his book down.

 

Victor nodded.  “Of course.  As apprehensive as you are tonight, I wouldn’t dare not to lock it.”

 

Yuuri tried to focus on his book before sighing in frustration.  “Vitya?”  He waited until the other man turned his attention his direction.  “I can’t seem to settle down.  Will you help me to relax?”

 

Victor placed the bookmark into his book and set it aside.  “Of course.  What do you have in mind?”

 

“Do you think...there is room in here to dance?”

 

Victor looked around thoughtfully.  “Possibly.  If we keep it close...nothing fancy.”

 

“I just want to feel you envelop me while the music is playing,” Yuuri stated with a frustrating sigh.

 

Victor picked up his phone and ran through his  [ playlists  ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NBuIU22BfKs&list=PLqQR2rKU30kL5cGIbCOO0h-zZTk0CpDkW) before settling on one.  Placing it into the speaker, he selected play before reaching for Yuuri’s hand, spinning the younger man into his arms, Yuuri’s back to his chest, they began to sway back and forth as Victor danced slowly, leading Yuuri through the motions to relax the man in his arms.  Kisses of lips, cheeks, shoulders, and fingers strayed through the movements.   Tender touches of arms, hands, and face brushed in contact.  They danced wordlessly, allowing their bodies to speak the thoughts between them.  

 

As they broke apart after the first song, Victor lifted Yuuri’s chin to kiss him into the next song, deepening the kiss as Yuuri opened up to him, melted into him.  Victor’s fingers strayed to the hem of Yuuri’s shirt.  “Can I?” he breathed.  Yuuri answered with a nod and a raise of his arms.  The shirt fell to the side and Victor could feel the other man’s bare skin against his own.  He allowed his kisses to roam, his hands exploring Yuuri’s muscular back and ass, fingers gripping as he felt Yuuri’s arms tightening around his neck.

 

Yuuri leaned back in his arms, gracefully arching over those hands and Victor was torn between watching Yuuri sway in his embrace or taking advantage.  He chose the latter, leaning forward, his capturing a nipple between his teeth jerking a surprised moan from the younger man even as his hips canted towards him.  Victor slipped a leg between the younger man’s thighs, lifting the outer leg at the knee.  Yuuri took the cue and wrapped it around him, soft moans sliding from his lips as Victor continued to tease his nipple, as his hips continued to rock into him.

 

Sliding his arms back up, Victor touched his brow to Yuuri’s holding those brown eyes with his blue as they continued to rock into the music.  Yuuri lifted his chin as Victor dipped, their lips crashing together, a groan slipping from one of them and swallowed by the other.  

 

Yuuri broke the kiss as the sixth song clicked into place.  “Do you realize that’s the third Ed Sheeran song in six?” Yuuri teased.

 

Victor grinned.  “I promise, I’ll eventually obsess over another artist.  Besides...you ignore the fact that there are probably just as many James Bay songs on that list.”  He ducked down and caught those lips once more, nibbling on the lower lip.  Moving his lips back towards Yuuri’s ear, he murmured, “Wrap your legs around me.”

 

Yuuri pulled up with his arms as Victor’s hands slid down over his ass, his legs wrapping around the older man.  Victor carried him over to the bed, crawling across with Yuuri hanging from him until they settled in the middle.  Thumbing the waistband, he mumbled, “These need to go.”

 

“Just make sure you return with yours gone as well,” Yuuri returned, lifting his hips to accommodate those demanding hands.  Victor walked down Yuuri’s body, sliding his pants and boxer briefs as he went.  Standing at the foot of the bed, Victor pulled the drawstring to his pants and winked as they puddled down to his feet.  

 

Yuuri laughed shaking his head.  Victor started to rejoin him when Yuuri shook his head.  “Huh-uh.  You are still overdressed,” Yuuri protested, pointing at the black briefs that winked back at Yuuri with their bedazzled star on the hip.  Yuuri called them his stripper briefs when he first saw them.  Victor laughed and said he wasn’t wrong.  He would have to take him to Chris’s Christmas party where dirty Santa was taken quite literally, he promised.  

 

For now, the briefs had to go and Victor made sure he made a show of it, turning around to show his tush as he dropped the briefs and jiggled his ass eliciting a giggle from the younger man. He winked over his shoulder and caught Yuuri’s blush, something that would always captivate him.  Kicking the briefs to the pile of laundry, he crawled back across the bed.  

 

“Now, where was I?” the silver haired man teased.  

 

Yuuri giggled as he wrapped his arms around Victor’s neck and pulled him into a kiss, his embrace loosening to cradle the older man’s head and neck in his hands.  “I love you, Vitya.”

 

“Mmmm,” Victor hummed.  “I think I figured that part out.  I love you, too,  _ zvezda _ .”  Victor submitted to Yuuri’s urging to roll him to his back, the music continuing to play in the background.  His breath gasped as he felt finger dancing around his entrance.   _ When did he get the lube?  _  Yuuri caught his eyes and he nodded his permission.  He closed his eyes momentarily as he felt Yuuri’s finger slide past the barrier.  His lips parted as he could feel the slow careful movement of his lover.  Yuuri would care for him as much as he would care for Yuuri and trusting him came second nature.  His eyes blinked as his head fell back for a moment before he heard the teasing click of Yuuri’s tongue chastising him.

 

“Watch me,” the other demanded.  Victor honed his eyes on the younger man and received a wink in response.   _ God, who taught him how devastating a well placed wink could be!  I’ve created a monster.  _  Victor grinned and then gasped as he felt Yuuri’s second finger teasing the edge of his entrance waiting for him to relax and let him in.  He moaned as the finger followed the first into him.   _ He is the only man I’ve ever trusted enough to submit like this.  I hope he knows he holds my heart in his grasp _ .

 

“Vitya?  Are you okay?”  

 

The question startled him.  He nodded but Yuuri remained still waiting for the words.  “Yes, my Yuuri.  I am...caught up in you,” he confessed.

 

A smile teased Yuuri’s lips.  He dropped down and brushed a kiss to Victor’s inner thigh, nipping at the opposite side.  Victor hissed in pleasure.  Yuuri then lifted those brown eyes and Victor could see the mischievous glint.  Lowering his head once more, Victor gasped loudly as Yuuri’s tongue slid up his shaft.  He hummed in pleasure at Victor’s response, opening his lips and sucking on the head, his tongue sliding around it like a lollipop.  He then sucked him down pulling a groan from the older man.  Victor’s eyes were wide, watching him, catching those brown eyes as they peeked up every time he bobbed up.  

 

The third fingers twitched by his entrance and he knew he would feel Yuuri fill him soon.  His legs fell open wider in anticipation and that third finger entered him.  The stretch caught his breath and he breathed in and out as he adjusted.  He noticed how Yuuri stilled, giving him the time he needed.  He began to shift his hips, breathing out the word “please” as he needed more from the younger man.  Yuuri’s laugh vibrated down his shaft.  “God, Yuuri!”

 

Those fingers found his prostate, teasing him as they glanced off the nerve bundle even, continuing to stretch and open him up.  Those lips sucked him down, Yuuri sinking lower on his length with every bob and Victor drowning in sensation.  “I’m going to come!” Victor cried out.

 

Yuuri only responded with “mmmhmmm” humming around the length as he sucked him even deeper.  

 

Victor felt himself coming apart in Yuuri’s fingers, his mouth, not knowing where to focus, anywhere, everywhere.  Then his eyes blinked back, his body unknotted, his release shooting through him.  Yuuri continued to suck him off through his orgasm before pulling off of him.  Victor stared up at the ceiling overwhelmed, overstimulated, those fingers still tormenting him within.  “Y-yuuri…”

 

“Do you think you can come for me again, Vitya?” he asked, his eyes half veiled.

 

Victor struggled a moment before nodding.  “Y-yes,” he stuttered, then hissed as he felt that hand pull from him, still focused on every touch, sighing into every brush of skin as he felt Yuuri lean over him, brushing his lips over Victor’s before leaning in to possess with those lips.  Yuuri reached for the condom on the nightstand but Victor’s hand reached to pull his hand away. “I want to feel you.”

 

Yuuri’s lips parted uncertainly, holding those blue eyes but nodded.  “I’ll go slow.  You said it was much more intense.”

 

“Y-yes.”  Victor’s eyes held Yuuri’s as Yuuri lined up his shaft to his entrance.  He could feel Yuuri’s breath against his skin, the heat of the younger man’s body, the brush of the tip against his entrance, the steady pressure as Yuuri pushed into him.  He knew his lips were parting, his breath was quickening as he breathed through the initial breach, then Yuuri was in him moving in excruciatingly slow intervals. Yuuri paused more than once, focusing on his breathing.  Victor watched those eyes blink and he reached his hand down and wrapped his hand around the base of his own shaft.  “Like this.”

 

Yuuri nodded, mimicking the motion to regain control.  Lifting his eyes to meet Victor’s he began to move deeper.  Victor lifted his knees to accommodate him, his eyes half lidding in the process.  Fully seated in him, Yuuri dropped his forehead to Victor’s as he breathed through his control.  “You feel amazing,” he murmured.  

 

Victor answered with a smile, feeling his body acclimate.  “Ready when you are,  _ lyubov moya _ ,” he returned.  Yuuri nodded and began a slow, shallow rocking motion.  Victor wrapped his legs around Yuuri and started lifting to meet him.  He wanted more speed, more friction and he used his body to communicate it.  Yuuri kept them close, and Victor felt his shaft sliding against the other man’s stomach with each thrust, the softer flesh welcoming him.  

 

“I’m not going to last long,” Yuuri grated out, and Victor could see the strain in his face.  He reached between them and started teasing his shaft to bring him closer to climax.  

 

Yuuri came first, but as the first wave hit, Victor felt himself unfurl, the white stream releasing between them.  Yuuri’s eyes blinked rapidly in response. “My god, Vitya!”  Victor knew what he was feeling, the direct stimulation of those walls from his orgasm vibrating through Yuuri’s shaft.  He lay back content in the younger man’s arms, feeling him collapsed on his chest as he withdrew.  

 

Yuuri pulled back finally and studied the man beneath him, sticky from his own cum on his chest, Yuuri’s running out between his legs.  “What a beautiful mess you make, Vitya,” he praised softly.  Victor couldn’t help the smile he offered.  He knew it would cover his face, his lips opening into what many have described as a heart.  Yuuri could do this to him, reduce him to a quivering mess and pull that smile from him.  Yuuri lowered over him and brushed a kiss over his lips before backing off the bed.  “Shower or do you want me to clean you up?”

 

“Oh, I don’t think I can stand, Yuuri,” Victor confessed.

 

Yuuri chuckled softly slipping away from him.  He returned a few minutes later with a basin and cloth, gently washing him down with warm water.  Victor watched as those hands then washed his own body before setting the dish aside.  Victor would likely wake up before his sleeping beauty and could clean up the room before he stirred.  

 

Crawling back in bed beside the man, Yuuri pulled the cleanest blankets over them before snuggling in.  “Good night, Vitya.  Thank you for helping me relax.”

 

“It is always my honor and pleasure to take care of you and to be taken care of by you, _ zvezda moya. _ ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So about those keys...


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Life matters...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, BluSkates and Magrathea, for getting right on this!

* * *

 

Yuuri skated beautifully that morning, however Victor moved a little stiffly.  Yakov grumbled and sent Victor to go stretch it out with Lilia.  Yuuri started to follow when Yakov waylaid him.  “Katsuki, I want to see your spins.”

 

“Yes, sir,” the Japanese man obeyed.

 

As Yuuri skated off, anyone nearby could have heard Yakov grumble, “If I had ten like him…”

 

Once Yuuri had left the ice, he was sent with Mila and Yuri to work with Lilia.  Victor passed them as he headed back to the ice.  “Feeling better,” Yuuri teased.

 

Victor gave him a tormented expression.  “She didn’t hold back.  You do realize that everyone believes you’re the sweet one that I’m corrupting.”

 

Yuuri smirked in reply, turning on his heel to walk off but ghosting his fingers over Victor’s ass in passing.  Mila was laughing outright when Yuuri caught up to them and Yuri was closing his eyes tightly.  “What’s wrong, Yura?” the brunette asked with mock innocence.

 

“I was told I need to hold on to as much purity as possible for my Agape,” the blond returned.

 

Mila, who had gained control of her laugh, sputtered once more.  “Your innocence?  The one caught with one of his ‘angels’ in his room last fall?”

 

Yuri flipped her off.  “Shut up, hag!”

 

“Whatever!”

 

Yuuri rolled his eyes.   _Why did I get stuck with the teenagers?_

 

Lilia entered the room tapping her cane on the wooden floor to draw their attention.  “Yuuri…I want you to lead them through the fundamentals and then work them through spins.”

 

“Yes, of course.” He paused, sensing something more in her instructions, “Lilia?”

 

“I have an appointment but with you here, at least they won’t suffer for it.”

 

“Oh, okay.  Yes, sure.”

 

As Lilia left, Mila was holding onto the ballet barre and leaning back.  “So how long should we wait before we skip out?”

 

Yuuri raised an eyebrow.   “On the barre, first position,” he demanded.

 

Yuri sighed.  He knew better than to believe the overly ambitious brunette would shirk his duties.  Stepping up to the barre, he placed one hand on the polished wood and began to work through the drills with Yuuri.  He knew his routines, had worked with him both in Detroit and Hasetsu.  Mila hesitated but after a hard stare from the Japanese man and she fell into position.

 

As they finished, the two younger skaters walked out as Yuuri continued to stretch.  Mila leaned over and whispered, “You didn’t warn me.”

 

“Yuuri can be just as tough as Lilia and is a perfectionist in ballet.  He kicks ass in other dance styles, as well.  If you wanted to add another influence, though, he could probably help you figure it out.”

 

“So…like the break dancing you both did at the banquet?”

 

“That’s just the tip of the iceberg.”

 

“Interesting.”

 

* * *

  


Back in the studio, Yuuri changed the music out from the piano mix he used for ballet to the music he would use for the freeform style he was working on.  He’d been studying videos and thinking about the changes he would like to add to his skating style for the next season.  Victor would go classic, he would go modern.

 

Victor left before Yuuri, texting to say he’d meet the younger man at home.  Yuuri responded that he’d be another hour.  He looked up in surprise when a shadow darkened the door.  “Oh, Dmitry.  You startled me.”

 

The older Russian thinned his lips.  “My apologies.  Yakov sent me around to see if anyone was still here.”

 

“I’ve got about an hour,” Yuuri explained.  “I’m working on something new.”

 

Dmitry raised his eyebrows.  “For this year?”

 

Yuuri laughed softly.  “No.  I’m thinking about next year and I’m trying to learn a new dance style to incorporate.”

 

“I, too, come from a dance background.  My mother danced in the Russian ballet and competed when she was younger.  She was very demanding,” Dmitry supplied, dropping down in front of Yuuri to mirror his stretch.  He studied his hands as he reached to the left.  “Ivan and I would like to get to know you better, Yuuri.  You are important to Victor and he is like a brother to us.”

 

“I’d like that as well,” Yuuri returned, stretching over the leg extended to the right.

 

The Russian nodded.  “Victor said you aren’t always comfortable in a club scene.”

 

“It depends on my anxiety whether or not I can even enter the environment.  The crowds and the chaos can really set it off,” Yuuri explained.

 

“Would you feel comfortable in a smaller setting?” suggested the younger man.

 

Yuuri wrinkled his nose thoughtfully.  “Perhaps I could give it a try.  Would you be upset, though, if we had to suddenly change plans?”

 

“Not at all.  We’ll prepare a couple of backup plans just in case.  Keep it small…just the four of us.”

 

“That sounds good.  Small doses always works best for me,” Yuuri smiled.

 

The other man nodded sharply.  “Good.  I’ll talk with Ivan and Victor.  Maybe one of our next two off days.”

 

Yuuri nodded agreeably as he watched the other man stand gracefully.

 

“I’d best go report to Yakov,” Dmitry added.

 

Yuuri drew his knees in.  “I won’t be much longer.”

 

_I love Mila and Yura but it would be nice to make friends my own age.  It might take the edge off of our home life._

 

Leaning forward in his stretch, he rested his eyes on Cocoa sitting patiently next to the door.  “Just a little longer, girl.”

 

* * *

  
  


An hour later, Yuuri opened the door to their apartment and frowned when he found it darkened with no signs of life.  Cocoa moved past and sniffed the area before going to her pillow and resting.  He pulled out his phone.

 

**Yuuri/ Vitya, where are you?**

 

Entering their room, he huffed seeing the bed a mess.  “Cocoa, look at your daddy leaving us with so much work,” he muttered.  The dog bounced a little.  With Makkachin gone, Yuuri suspected he’d taken the other dog for a walk.  He began straightening up the bedding then frowned.  “I put this in to wash this morning.  Do you think Victor dried it?  Well, maybe Sasha switched it out while we were gone.”

 

He continued making the bed.  As he walked out of the room, he automatically straightened the photo next to the door.  Moving to the kitchen, he started pulling a few things out to prepare their meal.  He thought Victor was going to take care of this but apparently they got their wires crossed.  His phone dinged with a text message as he pulled out the ground chicken.

 

**Vitya/ I haven’t been home yet.  I stopped to pick up the shopping.  I needed plasters and thought I’d take care of the rest of the list.**

 

**Yuuri/ Where’s Makkachin?**

 

**Vitya/ She’s not there?  Must be with Sasha.  Are you alone?**

 

**Yuuri/ At the moment.  Will you be long?**

 

**Vitya/ I’m on my way.**

 

**Yuuri/ I’ll continue prepping supper.**

 

Yuuri hummed as he settled the pots on the burners.  After setting up the rice steamer, he added the sake, mirin, soy sauce, sugar, and chicken into the first pot.  He continued to stir and break up the chicken until it soaked up the liquid base.  Setting it off the burner, he turned his focus to the eggs.  He scrambled them with salt and sugar.  He turned on the heat under the salted green beans around the same time.

 

Victor walked through the door just as it all came up off the stove and Yuuri plated their meal.  Victor hummed appreciatively as he pulled out a bottle of white wine.  “I don’t think I’ve seen your mother make this,” he murmured.

 

“Oh, this was much too healthy for her cooking.  It’s[ Chicken Soboro Donburi](http://www.japanesecooking101.com/chicken-soboro-donburi-recipe/).  I can make it much lighter than katsudon,” Yuuri explained.  Handing Victor a set of chopsticks, they began enjoying their meal.  “I thought you came home at first.  The bedding was on our bed.”

 

Victor blinked in surprise.  “We had it in the washer when we left.  Did we lock the door?”

 

“I thought we did but perhaps I didn’t check it.  I automatically used my key when I came home, just assuming it was locked.”

 

Victor frowned.  “It wasn’t me.”

 

An hour after dinner, the dishes washed and kitchen cleaned up, Yuuri cuddled with Victor on the sofa each with their second (third) glass of wine.  The jiggle of the doorknob announced Sasha’s return.  Victor felt Yuuri tense up and he automatically ran his hand up and down Yuuri’s spine in a comforting action.  Sasha came in and Makka lunged on the leash with a bark in Victor’s direction.

 

“Hold on, girl,” Sasha responded, placing a calming hand on Makka’s side as he squatted next to her.  The poodle sat down and Sasha released the lead hanging it on the hook by the door.  “I’m sorry.  I didn’t mean to be so late.  I met with an old friend who was looking for a roommate to see if we might work together.  She insisted we go look at the space afterwards.  I hope I didn’t overtire the old girl.”

 

Makka ran up to Victor, her tail wagging happily at the sight of Victor.  “Have you eaten?” Victor asked her, his voice rising to excitement.

 

Sasha sat in one of the chairs while he answered Victor.  “She hasn’t had her evening kibble.  Just the morning meal you put out and a few treats during the walk.”

 

Yuuri slipped from the tangle of Victor’s arms and signaled Makka to follow wordlessly.  Sasha looked up startled.  “She’s learned some new tricks.”

 

“Being around Cocoa has caused her to step up her game.  So, are you moving in?”

 

Sasha nodded.  “Yes, it’s a good price and the light is good for work.  She has an extra room I can use for my studio.  I meet her girlfriend tomorrow but she thinks that’s just a formality.  So…I guess I’ll spend the evening packing.”  He pushed up against the arms of the chair and disappeared down the hall.

 

“Will he have furniture to move?” Yuuri asked.

 

“Just his work surfaces.  The bedroom furniture belongs to me.”

 

“Well…I hope it works out.”  Yuuri stared down the hall doubtfully.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...I know there will be thoughts...


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Packing and worries...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, BluSkates and Magrathea, for such a speedy edit and read through.

* * *

 

Yuuri arrived home and called out a greeting to an empty apartment while Cocoa reacquainted herself with Makkachin.  Yuuri pulled down their kibble and refilled their dishes.  Sitting on the sofa with his legs crisscrossed, he scrolled on his phone.  Phichit and Chris were trading fluff back and forth on twitter mixed in with an occasional response from Seung-gil.   _ That’s interesting. _

 

**Yuuri/ How is my best friend?**

 

**Phichit/ So now you remember me!**

 

**Yuuri/ Contact works both ways.**

 

**Phichit/ So…I’ve got a situation.**

 

**Yuuri/ Does it have to do with a certain Korean and a Swiss?**

 

**Phichit/ Maybe?**

 

**Yuuri/ Spill.**

 

**Phichit/  Skype?**

 

Yuuri moved into the bedroom for more privacy, unlocking his door before entering.  Glancing around, he found the space relatively undisturbed.  He closed the door but left it unlocked so that Cocoa could use the bandana on the knob to open and enter.  When he tied them to the doors, he received some odd expressions from Sasha but Yuuri declined to explain.   _ Let him think I’m weird _ .  Cocoa could open any unlocked door in the house as long as it had a bandana attached.

 

He propped the pillows up in his bed and pulled the laptop close to him.  The app went through shortly and he was face to face with Phichit.  “So, talk to me,” he demanded.

 

“Well, I started talking to Seung-gil after, you know…his friend died?”

 

“Okay?”

 

“And Chris seemed okay with it.  But now I’m not so sure.”

 

“Did you talk about it with him?”

 

“Yes…and he said it was fine.  But now he tenses on the topic.”

 

Yuuri pursed his lips thoughtfully.  “So are you still interested in Seung-gil?  Crushing on him?  Or is this something more?”

 

“I…don’t know?”  The Thai’s blinked at Yuuri helpless.

 

“And how do you feel about Chris?”

 

“I like him,” Phichit answered without hesitation.

 

“ _ Like _ like him?” Yuuri pressed.

 

“Y-yes?”

 

Yuuri clicked his tongue as he thought about the situation.  “I know Chris had an open relationship with his last boyfriend.  But that’s an established boundary.  Have the two of you discussed the same?”

 

“N-no?”

 

Yuuri sighed, spreading his hands.  “Phichit…you can’t…you need to talk to him.  If you care about him…no, even if you don’t care about him, you owe him the courtesy to get this out in the open.”

 

“We never…we aren’t exclusive,” the younger man defended.

 

Yuuri shook his head.  “Sometimes exclusivity is implied.  You need to find out what’s going on.”

 

Phichit pouted.  “I really like Chris.”

 

“I know,” Yuuri murmured.

 

“But I like Seung-gil, too,” Phichit whined.  “You know how long I’ve been flirting with him.”

 

“But if you don’t talk to Chris, you could lose him,” Yuuri pointed out.  “Are you willing to risk that?  He may not want to share you.  He could have realized that after the fact and doesn’t know how to talk about it with you.  You need to talk.”

 

Phichit chewed his lower lip.  Yuuri didn’t like seeing the Thai man so uncertain.  It wasn’t in his personality.  He needed to resolve this conflict.  Of course, instead the younger man shifted the focus on him.  “So what’s going on with the Sasha situation?”

 

Yuuri grew animated, and with that the reserve in his voice dropped.  “He’s moving out!  He should be out in the next day or two.”

 

“Good!  That’s great news!  Is he still being creepy?”  Phichit responded with equal enthusiasm, filling the room.

 

“You think he’s creepy, too?”

 

“Yeah, based on what you’ve shared, I’m completely creeped out.  Chris agrees.  Do you think he wanted Victor back?”

 

“Maybe.  I don’t know…he kept encroaching on my space but then playing the friend card with Victor.  After Victor gave him the deadline, he…well, he’s been a bit nastier towards me.  He gives me the side-eye.  I catch him staring at me.  And this morning while Victor took Makka out, he was texting but kept looking at me.”

 

“Did you tell Victor?”

 

“Honestly, I just want him out.  I may go hang out with Yuri, though, when he starts moving.  I know he won’t want my help.”

 

“That’s not a bad plan.  You said Yuri got a weird vibe from him as well.”

 

“He did.  Just two more days.”  Yuuri started at the sound of the front door closing.  “I think Victor is home.  I’ll talk to you later, Phichit.”

 

“Alright.  Later,” Phichit followed up.

 

The call disconnected and Yuuri pushed up off the bed and opened the door to the living room.  Sasha was standing uncomfortably close to his door, so much so that Yuuri took a step back into his room.  “Sasha!  I thought it was Victor.  Can I help you?”

 

“I was just grabbing the tape to close up this box,” Sasha explained pointing at the packing tape on the nearby table.

 

Yuuri thinned his lips and stepped back nodding.  Sasha grabbed the tape and walked across the room to tape up a few boxes.  The Japanese man shifted uncomfortably.  “Do you need help packing?”

 

“Not from you,” he responded.

 

Yuuri shivered.   Grabbing his keys and phone, he locked the door behind him.  “Then I’ll take the dogs for a walk.”

 

“You do that,” the other man clipped as he stretched the tape over the seam.  Yuuri could hear the sharp break of the tape as he stepped out the door. Taking a deep breath, he called the dogs after him.

 

* * *

  
  


Yuuri didn’t know how long he’d been gone when a text came through pulling him from his thoughts.

 

**Vitya/ Baby, it’s getting late.  Where are you?**

 

Yuuri looked around.  He hadn’t realized that he had strolled into unfamiliar territory as he walked off his tension.

 

**Yuuri/ I don’t know.**

 

He followed it up with a picture of some of the surrounding buildings.

 

**Vitya/ You’re quite far.  There is a café another block away.  Wait for me there.  I’ll come get you.**

 

Yuuri continued down the sidewalk and found the mentioned café.  He ordered a cup of coffee while he waited, the dogs settling down by his feet at the outdoor table.  He could smell the sea not too far away and the distant cry of the gulls.  For a moment, he allowed his thoughts to drift homeward _.  I miss you, mama, papa.  This is so much harder than I thought it would be.  _  He drew a shaky breath, the sweep of sadness coming upon him unexpectedly.

 

When Victor drove up next to the sidewalk, he jumped out of the car and came straight to him, his motions quick and short.  He took the pink, watery eyes and the sad expression all in, closing his eyes to draw in his own breath.  He didn’t want Yuuri to be miserable.  This was the last thing he wanted.

 

“Maybe we should go back,” the Russian suggested as he knelt before the other man taking the younger man’s hands in his.

 

Yuuri shook his head adamantly.  “No.  I can do this.  It was…hard when I first went to Detroit.  I just need time, Vitya.  And…he’ll be gone soon.  Let’s give it longer.”

 

“Are you sure?  I can have plane tickets for us…” he faded out at the set of Yuuri’s stubborn jaw, watching the younger man press his lips together and draw in ragged breaths.  Yuuri didn’t like to run.  What the hell was he thinking?  “What do you need from me?” he finally asked, his voice tender.

 

“I just need time…and for now, to feel you nearby.  Can we…go see the sea?  I know it is near.  I can smell it…but I don’t know where.”

 

“Of course.  Why don’t I order us a couple of sandwiches and we’ll go sit and watch the sunset.”

 

Yuuri smiled, sad and weak, but it was still a smile.  “I’d like that.”  While Victor went to the counter to make their order, Yuuri loaded up the two dogs into the back seat of the SUV.  He was waiting in the passenger seat when Victor returned with their meal and drinks.

 

The drive took close to twenty minutes with traffic but Yuuri was quiet, his eyes watching the surroundings.  “We need to walk more,” Victor said finally to break the silence.  “I want you to be familiar with your surroundings.  Although taking a picture was smart thinking.”

 

“I would do that when I’d get turned around in Detroit,” Yuuri answered quietly.  “Coach Celestino had to come and pick me up more than once.  I have a good sense of direction unless I’m lost in thought.”

 

Victor nodded pressing his lips into a thin line, worry etching his brow.  “Is it just homesickness or is something else bothering you?”

 

Yuuri shrugged.  Victor knew him well enough to know it was the latter.  He gave him a few moments silence.  Finally Yuuri opened up.  “It’s just been uncomfortable since the deadline, since the two of you fought.  And he made it clear that he didn’t want me there.  I…didn’t want to stay so I took the dogs out.  Then my thoughts started piling on one another.”  He paused, frowning even as Victor found a parking spot.  “Victor?  Are you upset that I made you choose between me and your friend?”

 

Victor’s eyes widened.  “Honestly, Yuuri?”

 

The other man nodded slowly, his eyes focused out the windshield and Victor could tell he dreaded the answer but needed to know.

 

Victor took a deep breath before speaking.  “It was never a choice.  You will always be my priority.  But even if that wasn’t the case, I’m starting to see what everyone has been telling me.  I  _ am  _ too nice.  I let him take advantage of my kindness.  But I refuse to let him hurt the ones I love.  So…perhaps Sasha wasn’t such a friend after all.  My real friends never made me choose.  And, Yuuri?”  He waited until the Japanese man looked up and met his eyes. “You didn’t make me choose, either.  He forced the choice the moment he intentionally made you feel uncomfortable.  Chris sent me some information on passive aggressive behavior.  Just some links.  And now that I have read them, I realize that he’s been using those tactics against me…and later against you.  He could have been out much sooner.  The market isn’t that difficult.  I’ve checked.  So…I’m sorry.”

 

Yuuri blinked rapidly then was on his knees and half-crawling over the console.  Victor awkwardly pulled his boyfriend into a hug.  “He suggested you might resent me.  And I ignored it at first.  But my head…it grabs hold of those things and worries them.  You know how I am.”

 

“I know, my Yuuri.  It’s alright,” Victor soothed.

 

Victor helped settle Yuuri back into his seat before getting out to open the door for him.  He grabbed the blanket from the back seat that the dogs often laid on and carried it to a grassy area, spreading it out.  Yuuri followed with their meal watching the dogs play around Victor.  Settling in next to the older man, he breathed in the salty air, much sharper now that it was unimpeded.  “We need to do this more often,” the younger man suggested.

 

Victor turned and smiled, taking the offered sandwich.  “I think so, too.  You are already visibly relaxing.”

 

“The sound of the ocean crashing against the shore always gives me the feeling that it is taking away my worries.  I’m willing to let them go...for a while, anyway.”

 

They ate in thoughtful silence as the sun began to settle into the horizon.  At some point, Yuuri shivered and snuggled into his side.  “Thank you for bringing me here,” he murmured.

 

Victor smiled as he leaned his cheek against the brunette.  “I’m glad you can find at least a little bit of happiness in Russia.”

 

“I’ll find more...in time.  As long as you’re here, my happiness can’t be too far.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...there are some theories developing. Of course, they probably see as much (or maybe less) than you guys.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There were no poodles harmed in the making of this chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, BluSkates, for helping me get this ready for tonight.

It was an off day when Sasha moved out.  Yuuri moved around the apartment restlessly as more and more people invaded the space, picking up boxes, shifting around furniture.  He felt so unwelcome with the glances he received from Sasha’s friends that finally he grabbed the leashes and told Victor he’d see him later.  He walked at random at first but then his feet landed him at the dorms.  He entered the building and spotted several familiar faces.

 

The building housed several athletes, including hockey players, skaters, gymnasts, and dancers.  He could feel himself being appraised and sized up by the unfamiliar athletes as he walked through the lobby towards the elevator.  “Can I help you?” one of the larger men asked leaning against the frame.

 

Yuuri lifted his eyes to meet those of the other man and he felt himself shifting uncomfortably.  He scrambled to piece together enough heavily accented Russian to say, “I’m here to see a friend.”

 

The elevator door opened but all of the sudden Yuuri’s feet froze.  He stared at the interior.  Empty.  Smelled of sweat.  Dirt on the floor.  The large Russian standing next to the door continued to watch him with a heavy stare.  Glancing down to Cocoa, who was making a whining noise, he knew he needed to move.  Then a hand rested on his back.  

 

“He’s with us, Mikhail.  Back off.”  Yuuri looked up to meet Ivan and Dmitry’s eyes as they ushered him inside. “He’s an ass,” Ivan went on.  “Uses intimidation to bully some of the other residents.  He’s not as tough as he appears, though.  Yura kicked his ass.”

 

“We were all about to,” Dmitry added.  “He came on hard with Mila.  It shook her up.”

 

“All of us at the rink look out for each other.  And you’re one of us now.  He won’t mess with you again,” Ivan assured him.

 

“I was headed up to see Yura.  I…” Yuuri stopped, uncertain what he should say.

 

Ivan came to his rescue.  “Yeah, Victor told us that asshole was moving out today.  It’s about time.  He’s taken advantage of Victor for years but he never saw it.”

 

Dmitry nodded.  “It took him trying to mess with you to make Victor open his eyes.”

 

They arrived at the door, wood peeling, cat stickers and paw prints littering the surface.  Ivan chuckled.  “They are still doing that.”  Yuuri looked in Ivan’s direction in interest so the Russian continued.  “Well, Mila started it when she nicknamed him ‘The Angry Kitten’.  Then the stickers started to pop up.  Every so often a new batch would appear.”

 

Dmitry smiled.  “When Victor was here, it was poodles.”

 

“Why did Victor move out?”

 

The two Russians shrugged.  “Victor likes to socialize on his terms,” Ivan stated.  “After a while, he had his privacy violated too many times.  He moved out the next weekend.”

 

Dmitry grinned and added, “Not that he does anything halfway.  When we went to see his apartment…let’s just say I was impressed.  It’s the same one he lives in now.  But at twenty…let’s just say that Victor always seemed to have a way with money.”

 

Yuuri lifted his fist and knocked.  The door opened shortly and Yuri who had his ear to his phone, grabbed his hand and pulled him inside.  Pulling the phone from his ear, he looked at the other two.  “Staying or going?”

 

“We just walked Yuuri up,” Ivan explained with a shrug.

 

Dmitry nodded.  “Yeah…Mikhail was being an ass.”

 

“You say that like he’s ever not an ass,” Yuri deadpanned.  The other two Russians laughed and waved as they walked off.  Turning back to his guest, Yuri picked up a pile of laundry off the chair and nodded for him to sit.  Then he realized he was on the phone.  Returning to it, he continued his call while Yuuri unleashed the dogs.  When he returned to the living room, Yuri noticed the Japanese man’s expression.  “Don’t worry about him.”

 

Yuuri looked up with surprise.  “Who?”

 

“Mikhail is an ass.  Sasha is an ass.  And Victor…he can be an ass.  Have I covered all of the whose?”

 

Yuuri chuckled.  “I suppose so.  I’m sorry to come over uninvited.”

 

“I told you last week if you needed to get away to come over.  So I guess you were invited.”

 

“I guess so.  I just…I don’t know what Sasha told his friends but they kept giving me dirty looks.”

 

Yura shrugged.  “I’d expect his friends to throw some shade.  My friend Otabek just got into town.  He’ll be at the rink for the next week.”

 

“I remember him from past competitions.  He’s a good skater.  I didn’t know you were friends.”

 

Yuri shrugged.  “We met at World’s.  He said he looked forward to skating against me.”  Yuri couldn’t hold back his excitement much longer.  “He rides a motorcycle.  He gave me a ride earlier.”

 

Yuuri laughed.  “So you like the bad boys.”

 

“I didn’t…how did you…”

 

Yuuri pulled the younger Yuri into a hug, dropping his forehead to the blonde’s.  “Because I know.  Not that it matters.”

 

Yuri shrugged.  “It’s not like we know if he is.”

 

“Would you still be his friend either way?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Then start there.  Because if you can’t be friends, the rest is pointless.  And if he trusts you enough, he’ll let you know in his own time.”

 

“But you think he is?”

 

Yuuri smiled and shrugged.  “I have my own suspicions.”

 

Yuri sat down with his hands clasped between his legs.  “I mean, I’ve been with girls…but, you know…”

 

“It didn’t feel right?”

 

“It was okay when we were doing it.  I just never wanted to stick around.”

 

“You could be bisexual and homoromantic,” Yuuri suggested.

 

“I…is that a thing?”

 

“I have a friend that is homosexual and biromantic, so yeah,” Yuuri stated.

 

“Phichit?”

 

Yuuri chuckled.  “No…I don’t know if labels quite fit Phichit.  He’s…not bound by ideas of gender.  And like me, he tends to be genderfluid.”

 

“Genderfluid,” Yuri stated, turning the phrase over his tongue.  “They don’t talk about these things over here.  I mean, there’s the internet but you just don’t talk about them.”

 

“You are always welcome to talk about these things…with Victor or myself.”

 

Yuri’s eyes opened wide in horror.  “Victor would make it into some big thing!”

 

“Not in a bad way.  He’s emotional, sentimental, and he cares about you greatly.”

 

Yuri pulled his ankles, soles of his feet meeting, so his knees butterflied out.  “I know.  He looked out for me when I first arrived.  I don’t let people in very easily.  But…well, he would talk about himself and all of the sudden I felt drawn in and I started telling him about myself.  I think that’s why I was so upset when he just up and left.”  Yuri studied his feet in silence while the Japanese man waited.  “I didn’t know about you,” he added quietly.

 

“Victor didn’t want to share it because it was so personal to me.  I had to give him permission.  I’m sorry you suffered for it.”

 

“It seems selfish now.”

 

“It’s not selfish to want people you care about around you.  We can only act on the information we have…and sometimes it causes us to misstep.  But you overcame it.  And now I have you as a friend.”  The older man took hold of the blonde’s hands still resting on his feet.   “And you are very important to me.  To both of us.  I hope you know that.”

 

The blonde nodded.  “I suppose he’s told you about my life.”

 

“He hasn’t told me much and nothing more than I had guessed already.  He knows it is your life, your personal business.  He respects that…and I respect that about him.  I’m glad he keeps those confidences.”

 

Yuri smiled, his eyes still studying the hands in front of him.  “I…don’t want to talk about it now.  But I will…someday.  I have bad days.  At least I know where I can go.”

 

“You are always welcome with us…just as you welcomed me here.”

 

A knock on the door startled them and Yuri unfolded from his position on the sofa.  “That’s Otabek,” he hissed.

 

Yuuri chuckled.  “Well, you may want to open the door.”

 

“Oh, yeah…right.”  He skittered across the room and Yuuri couldn’t help but be reminded of a kitten.  The youth opened the door and the slightly older teen entered the room.

 

“Hi, Yuuri,” the Kazakh greeted.

 

“Hello.  I hope you don’t mind me crashing your plans.”

 

He shrugged.  “We were going to play _Overwatch_.”

 

“I haven’t played that one.  Do you mind if I watch?”

 

Soon the teens were settled in, focusing on their game.  At some point, Yuuri unfolded himself from the sofa and made them all lunch.  Bringing the snacks into the living space, Yuri looked up at him appreciatively and he received a thanks from the other.  The two teens didn’t stop their game, but continued to play and eat.  All three enjoyed the companionable silence with the game providing background noise.  The older man thought it would be awkward but really, it felt easy…comfortable.  Yuri was family, after all.

 

* * *

 

 

Victor carried out the last box from Sasha’s storage unit to his his SUV.  He looked up startled to see Sasha standing nearby.  “Do you mind if I ride over with you?”

 

“I suppose…not,” he answered, storing the last box into the back of his car.

 

The drive was silent.  Victor had volunteered to help in order to speed up the process and to make sure he had the key returned to him.  Sasha alternated between studying his nails and the road as if he was working up the courage to say something.  Then they arrived and it seemed the opportunity was lost.

 

In the mayhem, they managed to get all of the things inside and tucked away into the two rooms assigned to Sasha.  The artist said he would sort it all out later.  The important part was that he had his bed.

 

As the others started to leave, Victor hung around waiting to retrieve the key.  Sasha was stalling, pretending as if he didn’t know where it was.  Victor tapped his foot impatiently.  He wanted to get Yuuri and go home.

 

“I wish we could have gotten along better,” Sasha began.

 

Victor shrugged.  He saw through Sasha’s game now.  “Listen, I’m done with this.”

 

“It’s just that…he kept misreading me.  I never meant to make him feel uncomfortable.  I wanted us to be friends.”

 

“That’s not going to happen.  Just let it go, Sasha.  I’m sorry, but we’re done.”

 

“Fine,” Sasha returned with tight lips.

 

Victor raised an eyebrow.  “Key?”

 

With a huff, Sasha pulled out a keyring and extracted the key.  “Have fun finding someone to watch Makka.”

 

“Don’t worry about Makka…or me.”  Victor turned and walked out.

 

* * *

 

Victor had texted Yuuri as he was about to leave and Yuuri texted he was already home.  Victor entered the living room and smiled at the sight of his boyfriend relaxed.  “How was Yuri?”

 

“He was fine.  He had a friend over so I didn’t want to overstay.”  Yuuri was stretched out on the couch with one dog curled around his legs and another lying in front of him.

 

“Otabek,” Victor supplied with a smile.

 

Yuuri nodded.  “I hung out while they played a game, and then I made lunch.”

 

Victor laughed.  “You made them food and you were worried about overstaying?”

 

“Well,” Yuuri shrugged, “Yuri didn’t say anything but I kind of got the impression he was waiting for me to leave.”

 

“Our Yuri is growing up…and showing restraint.  I’m proud of him.”  Victor dramatically dabbed his eyes as Yuuri rolled his eyes in response.  Victor then settled his expression.  “You want to go out tonight?”

 

The Japanese man raised an eyebrow.  “What do you have in mind?”

 

“Well, I thought we could go to Russia’s interpretation of a jazz club,” Victor suggested.

 

Yuuri smirked.  “You do realize that I lived in Detroit.”  Watching his boyfriend flash a mischievous smile Yuuri relented.  “Okay.  This should be interesting.”

 

“Dmitry and Ivan want to join us,” Victor suggested.

 

“That’s fine.  They walked me up to Yuri’s room earlier today,” Yuuri supplied.  Victor waited knowing there was something more.  “Do you know a Mikhail?”

 

“Asshole hockey player.  Was he causing trouble?”

 

“He was using some heavy intimidation tactics at the elevator.  I kind of…was nervous about getting into the elevator alone.  That’s when Dmitry and Ivan walked up.”

 

“The figure skaters look out for each other because a few…not all, but a few of the hockey players have issues with us.  Yuri should have met you in the lobby.”

 

“I’m sure he didn’t think about it.”

 

Victor nodded.  “He has a boy on the brain.”

 

“Apple doesn’t fall far from the tree,” Yuuri murmured and Victor grinned and bowed in acceptance.

 

“I am said tree.  But Otabek is a good man.  Very respectful.”

 

“Do you know if he likes Yuri?”

 

Victor chuckled.  “For years.  When Yuri first came to the rink, there was a summer workshop.  Otabek attended.  He was drawn to Yuri then.  I’ve seen the events where their paths crossed, but I think Otabek was afraid to approach him.”

 

“Oh, wow.  He’s always been quiet and kept to himself,” Yuuri stated.

 

Victor winked.  “They say that about you.”

 

“Until alcohol is involved,” Yuuri returned.  He urged the dogs off the couch and stretched towards his toes.   “Are Dmitry and Ivan a couple?  I always see them together.”

 

“They grew up together.  More like you and Phichit.  They have great chemistry but strictly platonic.  Dmitry is gay although Ivan is bi.  Because of that, they’ve always looked out for one another.  Of course, I’ve been away for a while so who knows?”

 

“You seem close…but not?”

 

“They are family but Chris is still my best friend.  All three of them won’t hesitate and tell me if I’m fucking up.  I like that about them.  They don’t put me on a pedestal.”

 

“I suppose we should start getting ready.  When are we meeting them?”

 

“I thought we’d pick them up around eight.”

 

* * *

 

Two hours later the foursome found themselves huddled around a table in the[ JFC Jazz Club](http://jfc-club.spb.ru/).  Small, only a dozen tables, but it held a great atmosphere, Yuuri hummed with approval.  Dmitry leaned in and told the couple, “This place has showcased big names that pop in out of the blue like Bryan Adams.  And then there are smaller local bands.  So it could be a good night or a bad night music wise but Ivan and I like the atmosphere.”

 

Yuuri smiled warmly.  “It doesn’t feel crowded.  It’s a good call.  Thank you.”

 

“We wanted you to feel comfortable and when Ivan suggested the JFC we knew it was the place.”

 

“We reserved a table when we heard Sasha was moving.  Thought it would be a good celebration,” Ivan added.

 

“You said nothing when I saw you earlier,” Yuuri pointed out.

 

The two exchanged glances and shrugged.  “We thought we’d leave it up to Victor as to whether you were up to it or not.  He knows you better.  We can always find a couple of warm bodies to join us.”

 

Although the menu was basic, the atmosphere more than made up for it.  Yuuri found himself relaxing into the music, the conversation, and a few drinks.  Victor kept to coffee and tea, promising to be the responsible party for the evening but was just as relaxed as the others.  As the last set finished up, Victor’s arm wrapped around Yuuri protectively as he guided the younger man to his vehicle.  He laughed at his friends who basically hung onto one another.

 

* * *

 

An hour later, having dropped the other two Russians off, he guided Yuuri into his apartment.  The younger man was tipsy, sleepy drunk.  Victor opened the door and was greeted by a yelp from Cocoa.   “What’s up, girl?” Victor greeted.  The chocolate brown poodle led them back to the bedroom and towards the master bath.  She scratched at the door and it could be seen that the bandana had been worried.  It was then that they heard a whimper on the other side of the door.  “Makka?!!”  A bark came in reply.  Victor immediately tried the door.  “It’s locked.”

 

Yuuri sobered.  “Do you have tools?”

 

“Under the sink.  Only the basics.” Victor kept trying the knob, hoping that it would release.

 

“It’s all I need.  Hold on.”  Yuuri walked calmly to the kitchen and reached under the sink.

 

Victor was very stressed when Yuuri returned with the toolbox, calmly kneeling in front of the door and quickly assessing what he needed.  “How could she get locked in the bathroom?” Victor whimpered.

 

“They were probably playing and accidentally knocked it shut.  Give me a moment.”  Yuuri soon had the collar popped off around the door knob and then the lock was turned.  Makka erupted out of the bathroom in relief.  “Oh, poor Makka!” Yuuri cooed.

 

“You were good at that.”

 

“Indoor locks are easy.  Phichit…sometimes locks himself in the bathroom when he’s drunk and passes out.  So…I had to learn.”

 

“Come on, Makka.  Let’s go outside,” Victor baby-talked her.  “My poor sweet darling.”

 

Yuuri rolled his eyes as he put the door back in order.  On his way to putting the tools away, he straightened a random picture.  “Come on, Cocoa.  Let’s go outside.  Makka is getting restless.”

 

The dogs were very happy to be reunited as they lead the couple towards the elevator.  “That still seems strange,” Victor said as they left the building.

 

“We probably left the door partially locked on our way out of the bathroom earlier.  We were running a little late and in a hurry.”

 

“And poor Cocoa worked so hard to try and get her free.  You are such a good girl,” Victor praised.

 

They finally wrapped up their evening settling into bed.  Both dogs curled up around their humans, glad to have everyone where they belonged.

 

* * *

 

 

NOTES:

Here are some of the articles Chris shared with Victor in the last chapter:

 

  * [How to Spot and Stop Passive Aggressive Behavior](https://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2017/05/04/how-to-spot-and-stop-passive-aggressive-behavior/)
  * [10 Things Passive Aggressive People Say](https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/passive-aggressive-diaries/201011/10-things-passive-aggressive-people-say)
  * [7 Reasons Why People Use Passive Aggressive Behavior](https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/passive-aggressive-diaries/201403/7-reasons-why-people-use-passive-aggressive-behavior)
  * [What is Passive Aggressive Behavior](http://www.counselling-directory.org.uk/counsellor-articles/what-is-passive-aggressive-behaviour)
  * [Passive Aggressive Personality](http://www.healthline.com/health/passive-aggressive-personality-disorder)
  * [OOTF:  Passive Aggressive Behavior](http://outofthefog.website/top-100-trait-blog/2015/11/4/passive-aggressive-behavior)
  * [Five Levels of Passive Aggressive Behavior](https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/passive-aggressive-diaries/200912/the-five-levels-passive-aggressive-behavior)
  * [Passive Aggressive Conflict Cycle](https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/passive-aggressive-diaries/201307/the-passive-aggressive-conflict-cycle)



 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...he's out. What are we thinking now?


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victor learns something new that sets him on edge. Yuuri tries to take the edge off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My apologies. I don't mean to leave these for so long. Lately, I just seem to hang up in one story or another. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this angst/fluff chapter. I look forward to your comments below.
> 
> I greatly appreciate your help, BluSkates and Magrathea. Especially in the next chapter where I wrote until 2 a.m. because...I couldn't put it to bed but you could tell it, too.

* * *

 

Victor left the building manager’s office with a frown.  Apparently the message hadn’t gone out that Sasha was no longer welcome in Victor’s apartment.  The manager assured him that he would hold a staff meeting and put the word out.   _ I pay enough to make sure this apartment is secure. _  He pursed his lips.

 

He found out when he took the dogs out that morning.  The doorman told him that his visitor seemed upset that he missed him last night.  Victor asked him what was going on and learned that Sasha had come by looking for something he forgot at the apartment.  Victor responded that visitors were supposed to be restricted and require a call for approval.  That’s when he learned that the word hadn’t gone out that Sasha was no longer a part time resident.  When Sasha asked to be let into the apartment, they at least denied him, telling him that if he lost his key that he’d have to get it approved by Mr. Nikiforov to get another.  

 

Returning to his apartment, he gathered his skate gear.  Yuuri had gone ahead of him taking the dogs on leads and running to the rink picking Yuri up on route. Victor grabbed his bag and threw it over his shoulder for a moment before dropping the bag.   _ What could he have forgotten? _

 

He heard his phone buzz as he began to look through his apartment and finally making it back to the room that had once been occupied by Sasha.  He absently pulled out his phone and glanced at the message.

 

**Yuuri/ We made it.  Are you coming soon?**

 

Victor pursed his lips looking from the phone to the room.   _ The basic furniture seems to be in place.  Was it something that was lost? _

 

**Yuuri/ Is everything okay?**

 

Victor thinned his expression.   _ I’m taking too long. _

 

**Victor/ I’m just checking on something for the building manager.  Tell Yakov I’m running late.**

 

**Yuuri/ No problem.**

 

_ No problem. _  Victor studied the room and then began to open drawers.   _ Empty. _  The closet held the same results.  Victor sat on the bed.   _ Maybe, behind the chest of drawers? _  Victor then started to move furniture around looking behind and underneath, pulling drawers out to look inside for something that might have fallen behind.  Everything seemed stripped.  Sighing, he laid back on the bed.   _ Whe- _

 

Sitting up, he began to strip the blankets, sheets, and pillows from the bed.  Depositing it in the corner to wash later, he considered the mattress _.  If I were to hide something…could it be that simple? _  He narrowed his eyes as he began to feel underneath with his gloved hand.  Something hard met his fingers.  He pressed underneath and grabbed hold pulling it out.

 

_ A sketchbook. _

 

Pursing his lips, he asked himself aloud, “Why is this so important that you hid it?”  He began to thumb through the pages.  The first pages he recognized.  They were the initial drawings for the paintings in the living room.  Even when he reached the first couple of pictures of Yuuri, he recognized them from the photos that Phichit received permission to share.  One was even painted and hanging in the living room.  It was the next drawing that gave him pause.

 

That picture was in their bedroom.  He strode down the hall and into the master suite.  Sure enough, it was one of the photos Victor and Yuuri deemed private.  They didn’t go in the show and Victor suspected it wasn’t shared with Sasha.  Victor snapped a quick picture and texted Phichit.

 

**Victor/ Did you share this with Sasha?**

 

He sat back on the bed and began thumbing through the rest of the sketches.  More drawings taken from the private collection.  Victor started to feel sick.  The next few drawings were of Yuuri in the apartment.  The living room seated on the couch, the living room curled up with Makka and Cocoa sleeping, the kitchen sitting on a bar stool and leaning on the counter, the  dining room sorting through a box of tea, the…bedroom…napping.  Another…bedroom picture…Yuuri napping, curled up around Cocoa.  He thumbed through and realized more than the last half was of his boyfriend, unauthorized.  He found the drawing in the kitchen with Yuuri doing the dishes, the one Sasha denied drawing.  His phone buzzed.

 

**Phichit/ No, I didn’t.  You said it would be private.**

 

Victor snapped a shot of the sketch and sent it to Phichit.

 

**Victor/ How do I tell him?**

 

**Phichit/ Shit!**

 

**Phichit/ Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit!**

 

**Phichit/ Don’t spring it on him.**

 

**Victor/ I wouldn’t.**

 

**Phichit/ It’s all about timing.  Watch his anxiety.  Make sure he feels safe when you tell him.**

 

**Victor/ I’ll try.**

 

**Victor/ Thank you.**

 

Victor stared at the notebook a while longer before going to the closet and pulling out his personal safe.   Typing in the code, he opened it and slid it behind some files.  Locking it, he moved the safe back into its corner of the closet. 

 

Leaving the apartment, he stopped once more to talk to the doorman.  “Sasha hasn’t left anything behind.  We have no further business.”

 

“Of course, Mr. Nikiforov.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

Victor’s feet took him to the car.  He was late and Yakov will be pissed but that wasn’t the worry pressing on his thoughts.

 

At the rink, Yuuri picked up right away that something was bothering him.  He decided to tell him the simple explanation.  “Sasha stopped by the apartment last night while we were out and was allowed inside the building.  I had to talk to the building manager to make sure it didn’t happen again.”

 

Yuuri frowned.  “Did they let him inside?”

 

“No.  It just bothers me that he was even in the building.”

 

“I agree.  Hopefully they will be more careful.”

 

* * *

  
  


Yakov rode Victor hard for being late but Victor took it in stride.  There was more than one comment about him being distracted.  Yuuri watched him, a little worried, and decided he needed to do something to help settle Victor’s thoughts, or at least provide a better distraction.  He left Victor practicing, since the older man arrived late and would have to stay late.  Jogging home, he took the direct path, the dogs falling into step with him easily.

 

His first stop was a shower once he fed the dogs and settled them down.  He washed thoroughly and pulled out the razor he used on his legs.  Lathering up, he began the process, grateful once more that he wasn’t a hairy man.  He pulled on a robe and touched up the five o’clock shadow on his face before applying moisturizer and lotion. 

 

Moving into the bedroom, he smiled at the two dogs stretched out across their bed.  He began with the underwear.  He had a few pieces he hand washed a few days prior, as well as something he brought from Hasetsu.  The rest remained in a disorganized pile awaiting his attention.  He refused to wear as the thoughts of Sasha’s fingers on them lingered.

 

He chose his theme after finding Victor’s glam apron collection.  The full-bottomed, high-waisted black lace [ panty](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/9d/b5/7c/9db57c057c9025b8151f9e687256e8ae--vintage-bra-foundation.jpg) would go well with the full skirt he had planned for the evening.   He then pulled out from the tissue paper something he knew Victor hadn’t seen yet.  The black lace zip front corset [ bra](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/1f/70/69/1f7069832152b8feda7c2f07abcba56b.jpg) had been nestled, hidden in the closet back in Hasetsu.  Yuuri found it when he was looking through it over the summer and hid it away.

 

Removing his robe, he slipped into the satin and lace underthings.  He then pulled on flesh toned silk stockings that had a slight shine with the curve of his legs.  Slipping his feet into the red ballet flats, he reached for the [ red dress](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/1d/da/11/1dda119f38b38034ccd5a337162c5e33--s-housewife-costume-s-costume.jpg) he would wear for the evening.  Victor had just the apron to set this dress off.  He topped it off with pearls, necklace and earrings.  His makeup was simple, red lipstick, eyeliner, and a touch of blush.  He then added a hint of  _ Éros _ , the scent of cherry blossoms and cinnamon rising to the surface but he now picked up on the mimosa and Kyoto rose.  It was like smelling Victor’s scent.  Every so often he picked up on new notes. 

 

In the kitchen he donned the apron with red cherry sprigs.   He worked quickly and efficiently on the recipe he found while browsing a few days back.  The [ Mediterranean shrimp](http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/katie-lee/mediterranean-shrimp-2782186) looked promising, and Yuuri knew Victor loved to try different foods.  Finally, he mixed the drinks, choosing a [ Manhattan](http://www.delish.com/cooking/recipe-ideas/recipes/a3737/bulleit-manhattan-bourbon-cocktails/) to match the theme.  He was pouring the mix into the martini glasses when Victor arrived home.

 

Victor entered the space with his nose first, taking in the scent created from the meal in the oven.  “What are you cooking,  _ lyubov moya _ ?”  

 

“I thought you needed to unwind, Vitya dear,” Yuuri called from the kitchen.  He could hear Victor shuffling around in the entry. 

 

Victor rounded the corner as Yuuri bent down to remove the meal from the oven.  “F-fuck,” he hissed.  Yuuri stood up and turned around, the dress twirling around his knees.  Releasing a whistle of approval, he stammered, “Wh-where did you get that?”

 

“Oh, this old thing?” Yuuri asked with a wink.  “You didn’t think I had all of my things in Detroit, did you?”

 

“I guess not,” he responded, running his hand through his hair still wet from the shower he took at the locker room.  “I’m glad I at least cleaned up before coming home.”  He leaned towards Yuuri and dropped a kiss on Yuuri’s cheek as the younger man placed the meal on trivets and then backed out of his hold to twirl before reaching around to undo the apron.  Pulling it over his head, he hung it on a peg before turning once more.  “Wow.”  Victor reached for the pitcher of ice water with sliced lime floating inside and poured a glass.  Drinking it down, he felt a little more in charge of his faculties. 

 

“Come, Victor.  Bring the drinks.  Let’s sit down to eat together.”  Yuuri had somehow managed to plate their food into bowls and was carrying them to the table during Victor’s struggle.  He joined Yuuri with the drinks and went back to get the tray that held the pitcher and water glasses. 

 

With the first bite, Victor hummed with happiness.  “This is amazing.  How do you do this?”

 

Yuuri chuckled.  “I just found the recipe on the internet.  After that, it’s just following directions.”

 

“No, all of this,” Victor pressed as he appreciatively motioned the persona Yuuri presented.  “How did you dream this up?”

 

“I think I started putting it together when you showed me the aprons.”  Yuuri leaned forward, crossing his legs at the knees, the picture of elegant grace.

 

“Yuuri, when you are like this, do I…I don’t know.  Do I treat you as a woman?”  Victor ran his fingers through his hair uncertainly.

 

Yuuri laughed.  “I know some are particular with their pronouns.  Phichit and I are not.  I want you to treat me as a person.  Gender is not that big of a deal to me.  I’m Yuuri.  I just like what I like.  Tonight I feel feminine and I wanted to wear a dress and I wanted to help you to relax.”

 

Victor chewed thoughtfully.  “This wasn’t just about today.  You’ve been planning this.”

 

“I  _ have _ been.  I just didn’t know when to put the plan into action.”   They continued chatting lightly through the meal and then Victor helped Yuuri clean up. 

 

As they settled on the couch, Yuuri slipped his shoes off and tucked them in underneath him.  “It killed you to wear those shoes in the house,” Victor teased.

 

“Oh, god!  That’s the hardest part about this,” Yuuri confessed.  “I mean, being feminine is part of it but this...it was a performance.  Therefore, it required full costume.”

 

“Thank you,” Victor murmured, leaning forward and brushing a kiss over his forehead.  “You always find beautiful ways to show your love to me.”  He ran his fingers through Yuuri’s hair, smoothing it under his hands as he held onto Yuuri.

 

“You’ve been on edge today,” Yuuri observed quietly.

 

“I was just upset.  I want you to be safe.”  Victor thinned his lips and tightened his arms around Yuuri.

 

The younger man lifted his chin to look into Victor’s eyes.  “Should I be worried?”

 

“I-I don’t know.  Yuuri, I…has Sasha ever tried to…has he…” Victor struggled with the words, fear clogging the synapsis.

 

“I’ve told you everything he’s done.  He’s gone, Victor,” Yuuri assured him.

 

Victor nodded and was still for a moment.  But his nerves were still jumpy.  Finally, Victor voiced his request.  “I think I would prefer you not to run by yourself for a while.  Would you be okay with that?  It would make me feel better.”

 

Yuuri tilted his head thoughtfully.  “Has something else happened?”

 

Victor looked down, studying the man in his arms.  “I don’t want to spoil this.  You…you put so much into this.”

 

Yuuri shook his head, pulling his feet out from under him and turning to face Victor.  “Talk to me, Victor.  What’s got you scared?”

 

Victor sighed and stood up.   “I’ll be right back.”  It took him five minutes before he made it back.  He carried a notebook nervously in his hands.  “I-I found this between the mattresses in the spare room.”

 

Yuuri cautiously took the notebook.  He then started to flip through the pages studying the sketches, connecting them to the paintings on the high wall.  Then his fingers stilled.  “This is me,” he whispered, fear edging his voice.

 

“There’s more,” Victor answered, his own whisper holding more fear.

 

Yuuri continued to move through the pages, recognizing the photos, drawing in sharp breaths but still mentally explaining them away.   _ He drew these when he unpacked them. _  Then he turned another page.  “I told him not to draw me!”

 

“It gets worse,” Victor’s voice washed over him quietly.  Yuuri shivered next to him darting his eyes from Victor to the sketchbook.  He knew when Yuuri reached the bedroom sketches.  The notebook fell from his fingers landing on the floor.  Victor lifted his eyes and could see Yuuri’s pale expression. 

 

“V-victor.  He was in our room.  While I was sleeping.” The tremor in his voice vibrated through Yuuri, his face pale.

 

“I’m sorry.  I didn’t…I never imagined.  I’m so sorry.”  Victor reached out hesitantly towards Yuuri uncertain if he’d accept Victor’s arms.  Yuuri fell into his embrace, trembling.  Victor held onto him apologizing over and over. 

 

At some point, Yuuri stilled in his arms.  Neither knew how much time had passed, just that the shock had worn away and they were left with the harsh reality.  Victor stroked Yuuri’s hair and cheek, cradling him to his chest.  The flicker of candlelight filled the darkening space.  “I won’t leave without you,” Yuuri finally murmured answering his earlier question.

 

“Thank you,” Victor answered.  “I want to take this to our attorney.  Find out our options.”

 

“I think that’s a good idea,” Yuuri agreed.  Then another wave of uncertain fear washed over him.  “Why would he do that, Vitya?”

 

“I don’t know, Yuuri,” Victor confessed.

 

Victor eventually unfolded them from the couch and guided his lover to the bedroom. 

 

Yuuri pouted.  “I was planning for such a lovely evening and now the mood is spoiled!”

 

“I’m sorry,  _ malysh _ ,” Victor murmured gathering Yuuri into his arms.  Yuuri continued to pout and Victor wondered if he knew how powerful his pout could be.  Yuuri rarely used it, giving it an extra potency.  Victor’s lips moved over his.  “I couldn’t keep this quiet.  You needed to know.”

 

“It just…if he was in here, it makes me wonder what else he has done.”  Yuuri shivered.  Victor tightened his hold on Yuuri gathering him in his lap.  “Make me feel safe, Vitya,” he implored.  “Make me feel a part of you.  This...this has me afraid.  I need you.”

 

Victor’s hands were already working the zipper on the dress as he continued to lean forward capturing small kisses.  Leaning back, he pulled the garment over Yuuri’s head.  “Do we need to hang this?”

 

Yuuri frowned and huffed.  “It would be best.”  He pulled himself off of Victor’s lap and traipsed across the room with the dress in hand.  Victor watched appreciatively the swing of Yuuri’s hips in those lace undies.  Securing it on a hanger, Yuuri turned to see Victor’s eyes never left him.  He exaggerated his hip movements as he returned.  “Now where were we?”

 

Victor’s fingers teasing the zipper of the corset.  How quickly Victor could restore the mood!  “I haven’t seen this either.  Also stashed in your old room?” 

 

“Perhaps,” Yuuri answered coyly. 

 

Victor kissed along Yuuri’s jaw and murmured into his ear, “What other surprises do you have in store for me?”

 

“If I told you, then where would the surprise be?” Yuuri teased, a moan slipping out as Victor nibbled at his earlobe.

 

“Mmmm, how do you want tonight?” Victor breathed next to his ear.

 

Yuuri offered a teasing smile.  “I want you in me.”  He lightly grinded into Victor.

 

“As you wish, Buttercup,” he returned with a wink before leaning down to grab the zipper with his teeth and edging it down a few inches.  He blew softly across the newly bared skin feeling the shiver slide through Yuuri. 

 

“Vitya,” he moaned softly.

 

Victor turned and eased Yuuri back onto the bed, his fingers dancing down the corset.  “I think…I love you in a corset,” he finally decided.

 

Yuuri chuckled.  “My collection is lacking in that area.  Perhaps you can help me remedy that.”

 

“My pleasure.  Now the real question…do I prefer you in the corset or out of it?”  Victor lowered his lips into the V formed by the zipper and slowly kissed the patch of exposed skin.  His fingers thumbed the suspenders holding Yuuri’s stockings in place.  One by one, he slipped the catches.  He then scooted further down and lowered his head to smell Yuuri’s scent through the lace of the panties. 

 

Yuuri tangled his fingers in Victor’s hair even as his stockinged foot teased up Victor’s side.  He gasped and then moaned as Victor ran kisses over his length through the lace.  Victor thumbed the waistband as his mouth continued to explore him.  Rising up on his hands and knees, the older man seemed to come to a decision and Yuuri felt the tug of the panties and lifted his hips to assist in the endeavor.  He then watched as Victor carefully removed the silk and lace determined to leave the stockings in place.

 

“I think I prefer you in stockings,” he stated with a wink as he tossed the panties over his shoulder. 

 

“I think I prefer you naked,” Yuuri returned with a raised brow staring pointedly at Victor’s overdressed condition.

 

Victor chuckled, his hands moving to remedy the situation.  When Victor rejoined him, the only thing that lay between them were the silk of the stockings and the lace and satin of the corset.  Yuuri wrapped his leg around Victor sliding the silk over the older man’s leg and hip.  He watched the blue eyes blink rapidly, indulging in the pleasure of the fabric.

 

Yuuri placed the lube in Victor’s hand and the other man raised his eyebrows in surprise.  “Are we growing impatient?”

 

“Lace will do that to me,” Yuuri confessed.  Victor guided him to flip over.  Yuuri slid his knees forward lifting his ass in presentation.  He was rewarded with a chuckle.

 

“So eager,” Victor murmured.  He punished that behavior by applying the lube directly to Yuuri’s skin receiving a hiss as the cold liquid worked its way down the crevice.  Victor leaned over Yuuri, one hand moving to his satin and lace covered abs as the other slid down towards his entrance.  His finger entered with the ease of frequent sex.  “You take me in so well,  _ malysh _ ,” he purred.  Yuuri moaned softly to his touch as Victor slid the finger along his passage.  He soon added a second finger, and the two seemed on a mission to find Yuuri’s prostate.  The hitch in Yuuri’s voice followed by stronger moans told Victor  _ mission accomplished _ .

 

Victor fell back on his knees once more, his free hand now grounding on Yuuri’s hip as he watched Yuuri stretch around the third finger, watched Yuuri push back wanting more.  Flicking up to Yuuri’s expression of pleasure, he teased the entrance with a fourth receiving a pleading “please” in response by the brunette coming apart before him.  With the fourth finger, Victor found himself deeper in Yuuri and the younger man was becoming a mess before him, his cries begging him, pleading him to just fuck him.

 

Still, as Victor removed his hand, Yuuri groaned in protest.  Victor chuckled.  Yuuri always wanted it both ways.  He leaned forward to grab the condom as he began stroking his length.  Yuuri shook his head. 

 

“I want to  _ feel _ you, Vitya,” Yuuri begged exaggerating out the ee’s in feel. 

 

Victor abandoned the condom.  Adding more lube to his length and to Yuuri’s entrance, he lined up and slowly began to sink into Yuuri’s amazingly tight ass.  How does he stay so tight with all of that stretching and prep?  Victor groaned as he moved easily into him, the walls hugging his length.  “God, you feel amazing!”

 

“Mmmm,” was all he received in reply, Yuuri’s eyes closed as he focused on the feeling of Victor filling him.  Victor kissed up his back as he continued to sink deeper, resting his cheek on Yuuri’s shoulder as he felt himself fully gloved.

 

It took a moment to acclimate.  Yuuri held still while Victor focused on control.  As Victor started to move slowly, he kissed Yuuri’s shoulder and murmured next to his ear, “I love you.”

 

“Mmmm…I know, Vitya,” Yuuri responded languidly.  “I love you, too.” 

 

Victor’s initial movements were shallow, in and out, getting used to the feel of Yuuri’s tight silken walls.  God, he loved silk.  A hand unconsciously went down and stroked the stocking, the other resting securely on Yuuri’s hip.  He began to elongate the strokes, still slow and steady.  Yuuri’s moans filling the space between them.  Victor shifted on an outward stroke and then slammed back into him, gaining a gasp of pleasure in reward.  That was all of the encouragement Victor needed to increase the pace.  Yuuri met his strokes, taking in his length hungrily. 

 

They lost themselves in the feeling, in the erotic sounds slipping from their lips, in the presence of one another.  Yuuri only felt this free with Victor, only felt this safe with Victor.  Victor who understood him like he understood the ice.  Victor only gave himself this freely to Yuuri, only opened this easily with Yuuri.  Yuuri who saw beyond his fake smiles and still accepted him. 

 

Victor felt the knot inside of him unfurl, his release was…”Yuuri, I’m about to come.”

 

He became vaguely aware of Yuuri grabbing his own length, timing his strokes as Victor slammed into him.  Then he felt it, the waves of Yuuri’s release dancing through the walls sending Victor over the edge.

 

Victor draped over Yuuri, holding him around the waist as they turned on their sides.  They were both breathing hard.  Victor slowly slid out of Yuuri who lamented the loss with a moan of protest.  Finally, Victor asked, “Bath or just clean you up?”

 

“Bath,” Yuuri stated.  “And you join me.”

 

Victor nodded, gradually unwrapping himself from Yuuri’s body.  He felt the ache in his muscles as he padded across the floor to the bath.  The stress of the day followed by Yakov’s demands should have finished him off.  But Yuuri’s need for him eclipsed both of those and he gave in easily.  Yuuri always would.  Setting the taps, he let the water run as he added some Epsom salts to the water.  He looked up as Yuuri joined him and helped the younger man into the tub.  He was always stiff after receiving and Victor would do anything to make him more comfortable.

 

“Join me,” Yuuri demanded once more, leaning forward.

 

Victor slid into the space made for him and smiled as Yuuri settled in against his chest.  Even though the day opened up new fears, he still had this.  He still had Yuuri turning to him, resting in his embrace.  And this was his world.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And they still haven’t considered changing the locks.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Realizations and complications.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the editing, BluSkates and Magrathea!
> 
> I'd like to point out that my lovely editors have some great fics of their own. Please check them out: 
> 
> [Spotlight on Adventure](http://archiveofourown.org/works/11667576) by Magrathea
> 
> [Ningen](http://archiveofourown.org/works/11282742/chapters/25236696) by Magrathea
> 
> [Memories Are the Only Real Ghosts](http://archiveofourown.org/works/11554047/chapters/25949061) by BluSkates

* * *

 

Yuuri woke feeling rumpled and picked up his phone to check the time.  He smoothed Victor’s hair and slipped from the blankets.  Every time Yuuri shifted during the night, the Russian pulled him closer as if he was afraid that Yuuri would be pulled from his grasp.  Yuuri thinned his lips thoughtfully.  He understood the Russian’s protective drive.  Truly.  But part of him was glad that they would go to counseling this day.  He bent over his boyfriend and brushed a kiss on his forehead before leaving the bedroom.

 

With a robe tied loosely at his waist, he walked over to the console to sort through the mail Victor had dropped off the previous evening.   _Oh, a care package from Natalia and Ashley.  Detroit seems like such a long time ago but really it’s only been about three months.  We’ll have to look for some gifts to send back._  Carrying the box to the table, he saw that it was addressed to him.   _I suppose I don’t need to wait_.  He began to thumb the tape glancing up towards the door to the bedroom and thinning his lips.

 

He worked the tape loose and opened the flaps to the box, revealing the contents.  Inside, he smiled to find a new collar for Cocoa.   Opening a letter with Natalia’s handwriting, he read her crisp script.

 

_Dear Yuuri,_

 

_I hope this letter finds you well.  I know two things about you that will always hold true.  (1) You absolutely suck at answering email, checking your social media, and occasionally even forget to return text messages.  (2) You collect tea to a fault.  So I’m taking an old fashioned approach to address both of these items._

 

_This summer I went to a conservatory workshop in Colorado where I met this guy…his name is Mark.  I mean, he’s not a Russian hottie , but we all can’t get lucky.  Anyway, we were staying in this tiny ski town where I found this spice and tea shop.  So I begged him to go in with me.  Found some great spice blends.  And I hope the tea I’m sending you is good.  I went for the unusual._

 

Yuuri stopped reading for a moment to dig around in the box and unearthed a plastic bag holding a[ Black Chocolate Tea](http://www.spiceandtea.com/shop/teas/black-chocolate-tea.html) blend and another containing [ International Breakfast Tea](http://www.spiceandtea.com/international-breakfast-tea.html) …both containing chocolate flavor notes.  Yuuri couldn’t help the smile.    _Of course she picked those blends.  She eats, sleeps, and breaths chocolate.  Well, at least I won’t have to think too hard about what to send her._  He picked up the letter and continued reading.

 

_I ended up moving in with Ashley.  Tuition increase means cutting costs elsewhere.  Mark asked me to move in with him but I don’t think so.  We just met and I’m not sure I’m that committed to this relationship.  So when Ash invited me to room with her, I jumped at the chance._

 

_My advisor double checked my credits and it looks like I’m into my last year for my MFA in Music Composition and it’s going to be hella busy.  I hope you will be able to come to my graduation recital.  It will be after Worlds.  You can stay with us.  Well, I need to wrap this up because Ashley wants to get this into the mail today.  I hope to hear from you soon._

 

_So many hugs,_

 

_Nat_

 

Yuuri smiled as he folded the letter in half and slid it back into the envelope.  The tap of claws hitting the floor told him the dogs had stirred.  Looking up, he spotted Cocoa edging the door open with her.  “Good morning, baby.  Come here.  You have a present from Nattie and Ash,” he cooed.

 

Cocoa happily came to his side and Yuuri began to unbuckle her old harness.  Examining it, he realized it was time to make the change.  The new[ harness](http://www.poodleforum.com/attachments/member-introductions/183514d1409974682-new-standard-poodle-service-dog-training-photo.jpg) was purple and held a pouch for her papers.  Yuuri sifted through the patches and Velcroed the _Service Animal_ patch on both sides and the _Working_ patch on the back.  “Aren’t you a pretty girl,” he cooed, running his fingers through her curls.

 

The shuffle must have woke Victor because he soon staggered through the door rubbing his eyes and wearing only his briefs.  “Oh, I forgot to tell you that you had a package.”

 

“Ashley sent a harness for Cocoa and Nattie sent tea.  There’s more but that’s all I’ve uncovered.”

 

“Maybe we can put something together to send back.”

 

“They are rooming together and Nat is into gourmet cooking.   I’ll have to think about Ashley.”

 

“We don’t have to send something right away,” Victor surmised.  “I’m glad we heard from them finally.”

 

“Natalie was out of state and apparently dating someone named Mark.”

 

“Ah…new romance.  Everything else falls away.” His voice was tinged with practiced wisdom.

 

Yuuri snorted at the vision of the wise man in boxer briefs who had cast aside the fact that they had only been dating a little over half a year.  “Do you want breakfast?”

 

Victor ran his hand through his hair and frowned.  “Let’s stop at a coffee shop along the way.  Come shower with me.”

 

“Okay?”  He allowed himself to be guided into the bathroom by his boyfriend who seemed to still need him to be close.  As they stood under the shower head, Victor sought out Yuuri’s lips.  They broke from the kiss and Yuuri turned to reach for the shampoo.  “You know I’m not going to disappear,” he said softly.

 

“The sketchbook scared me, Yuuri.  I realized I let someone close that could hurt you.”  Victor washed down the side of Yuuri’s arms, running his hands down with the cascading water.

 

Yuuri sighed, he could hear Victor’s blame for himself in the tone.  “That could be anyone.  You didn’t know he was like that.”

 

“No…I suppose I didn’t,” Victor muttered unhappily.

 

Yuuri reached up and lathered the shampoo into Victor’s hair and began the process of washing the two of them.  He hated to see his boyfriend so shaken and worked to ground him, washing him, drying him, and dressing him.  Victor was crashing emotionally and Yuuri was only able to put him through the motions.  After dressing himself, Yuuri asked, “Are you able to drive today?”

 

The question seemed to startle Victor out of his head.  “Of course, Yuuri.”  He smiled weakly.  “I’m just…worried,” he added with a shrug.

 

“Are we taking only Cocoa or do you want to bring Makkachin as well?”

 

Victor turned towards the apricot poodle lying across the bed.  “Are you up for an outing, Makka?”  The dog lifted her head for a moment then laid it back down.  “I think she is still tired after yesterday.  Let’s take her out and then we can settle her in for the day.”

 

“I shouldn’t have taken her for a run,” Yuuri stated remorsefully.

 

“She enjoyed the day out.  It just takes her longer to recover.”  They walked both poodles down to tend to their needs.  “Thanks for waiting to go down until I was up,” Victor murmured as they rode the elevator back up.

 

“It would have freaked you out to wake up and find me gone,” Yuuri acknowledged.  “I love you too much to put you through that.  Although if they were insistent, I would have dragged your ass out of bed in a heartbeat.”

 

Victor laughed.  “Noted.”

 

They settled Makkachin with her favorite chew toy – a giraffe – and her blanket.  Makka stretched across her dog pillow and lolled her tongue happily.  Victor scruffed his fingers through her long bangs.  “I’ll be home as soon as possible, baby girl.  You be good while I’m out.”

 

She barked in reply and rested her head across her paws.

 

He followed Yuuri out but his feet were dragging.  “Yuuuuuri, what are we going to do when we go to competition?”

 

“If one of our rink mates stay behind, we’ll ask them to keep her,” Yuuri stated as if it were the simplest of solutions.

 

“Dmitry doesn’t do well with dogs.”

 

“You have other rink mates, Victor.  Would you prefer to kennel her?”  Yuuri watched as Victor shook his head.  “The only other option is to take her with us.  It will take planning and be more costly.  I don’t mind though.  I just don’t know which will be harder on her.”

 

“I was reading where older poodles become depressed when their owners are away.”

 

“I suppose we should research it.”  Yuuri stilled his feet and looked up.  “Do you think Vicchan was depressed?”

 

Victor saw the quickly building distress written on the younger man’s face and pulled him to his chest.  “That’s not what I meant at all!” Victor assured him.  “I just…Makkachin only has me.  Vicchan had your whole family.”

 

“I suppose…he was well loved.”  Yuuri’s voice was shaky but settled.  “I’m sorry.  I didn’t expect to get emotional all of the sudden.”

 

“Never apologize for your grief.  You are allowed to grieve in any way that you feel necessary.”

 

“Thank you, Vitya.”  Yuuri rested his head against Victor’s chest a few more moments before stepping back.  “We had best get going if we are going to stop at the coffee shop before our appointment.”

 

* * *

  
  


Dr. Abramovich greeted them warmly.  “Tell me about your week,” he invited.

 

“Sasha moved out,” Yuuri stated, settling onto the couch.

 

Victor nodded, but knew it was important to fill in all the details right away.  “Then we found a sketchbook full of drawings of Yuuri that he never authorized.”

 

“I see.  How did that make you feel, Yuuri?” the old doctor inquired.

 

Yuuri shivered.  “Honestly…a bit violated.  Some were drawn while I was sleeping in our bedroom, which Victor had made clear was off limits to him.”  He handed the notebook over to the doctor.

 

Abramovich thumbed through the drawings, frowning.  “Does he have access to your home still?”

 

Victor shook his head.  “He handed his key directly to me and the building staff have been informed that he is not to be admitted.”

 

“These show some obsessive tendencies.  This could lead to stalking…although his motivation doesn’t seem to be your celebrity status.  He may have become[ obsessed](https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/happiness-in-world/201004/obsession) with you based on his art.  It could be something closer to erotomania.”

 

“What is that?” Yuuri asked narrowing his eyes.

 

“[ Erotomania ](http://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/psychpedia/erotomania) is a delusion that you are in love with them.  It’s a very powerful delusion, one that the person builds with subtle details of their target that can be based loosely in reality or are entirely fabricated.”

 

Yuuri shifted in his seat a little alarmed, “I never led him on.”

 

The doctor quickly put a hand out to assure the smaller man, “it’s nothing you did. This person created a fictional narrative, entirely in his head and constructed from evidence just as fictional.  You could have dropped a towel, he would have seen it as a signal.  You could have coughed and he would have read it as message.”  The doctor watched the man struggled with that he was learning and wanted to enforced strongly that he was in no way to blame.  “Erotomania has nothing to do with the actions person targeted, it is entirely in his mind and you are not responsible for that.”

 

Yuuri nodded and breathed out listening calmly again.

 

“Regardless of his motive, neither of you should underestimate him.  Stalkers can be persistent.  You might want to take some stronger measures.”

 

“We are going to see an attorney this afternoon to find out what recourse we have,” Victor added.

 

Yuuri frowned.  “Victor also asked me not to go outside alone.  It’s frustrating because I like my freedom but…I guess he’s right on this.”

 

“You should never underestimate someone who shows stalking tendencies,” Abramovich reinforced.

 

Yuuri frowned.  “Dr. Abramovich, do I put something out that draws them to me?”

 

“Explain what you mean,” the old doctor invited.

 

“I mean…I was targeted by strangers who raped me.  Then an acquaintance tried to use that as a catalyst to harm me, and attempted to rape me as well.  And now this.  Am I doing something to make this happen?”

 

“No, of course not,” the psychiatrist was quick to reassure.  “But these other two men knew your story, right?”

 

Yuuri nodded slowly.

 

“Some will incorrectly eroticize rape.  Others will perceive vulnerability.”  The doctor kept his voice level to help Yuuri contain his anxiety, which was bubbling under the surface.  “Unfortunately literature, pop culture, and even in some cases education have all helped this ridiculous idea find ground and become popular.  Your former roommate, and the man prior to him, knew of your rape, and using that information drew an incorrect assumption about you and the event.

 

“What can I do…to dispel such ideas?”

 

“Don’t blame yourself.  Choosing to not be a victim is a step towards strength.  Continue with your therapy and developing a healthy view of your sexuality and relationship beliefs.  Also, build skills for responding to risky situations.”

 

“My anxiety…it makes me second guess my instincts…it makes me worry about being a burden.”

 

“I believe this came up last session.  Are you vocalizing your concerns more?”

 

“It’s improved,” Victor noted.  “But I still worry that Yuuri doesn’t tells me everything.”

 

“I try,” Yuuri muttered, leaning forward in his chair and shifting uncomfortably.  “Sometimes it feels…inconsequential.”

 

“The most important part is to get you to feel empowered, to teach you to be aware of risky situations and be unafraid to act.  We are actually instituting several new programs and one is a self-defense program that includes preventive strategies.  We find that some of our clients like to bring friends and they are welcome.  The new program begins next Monday and repeats weekly.  This is an evening course starting at six and continuing until nine.”

 

Yuuri frowned.  “My Russian may not be strong enough.  I don’t speak it well.”

 

“I can accompany you to interpret,” Victor offered.  “I’m sure Yura will as well.”

 

“And maybe Mila,” Yuuri suggested.

 

“It sounds like you have a solid support system,” Abramovich added.  “So let’s utilize it.  Now, let’s talk about your mental welfare.  Have you had any recurring PTSD symptoms?”

 

Yuuri closed his eyes to do a self-check.  “Although I’ve been scared, most have been reasonable responses,” he determined.  “I think…I’m fine.  My anxiety is a bit on edge but that, too, is understandable.”

 

Turning to Victor, Abramovich asked, “And you?”

 

Victor sighed.  He couldn’t lie, not with Yuuri sitting right there.  “I’ve been very protective.  I have been experiencing nightmares and frequent bouts of guilt,” he confessed.

 

“It sounds like we need to go through your protocols once more.  Yuuri, I’d like to do the same with you as well.  With EMDR, it is good to go through the checks just to make sure.  Who is going first?”

 

“Victor will take longer,” Yuuri stated.

 

“Let me get you taken care of, then,” the doctor stated.  “Then I can have one of the nurses take you to a meditation class to help you with your anxiety.”

 

“That…actually sounds good.  Can Cocoa go with me?”

 

“Of course.”

  


* * *

  


It was past noon when they left the clinic but Yuuri felt clearer minded and Victor appeared more relaxed.  “Lunch, then the attorney,” Victor stated.

 

The visit to the attorney was frustrating.  Over the summer, Victor’s publicist included celebrity trademark registration among the contracts as both a protection and for branding purposes.  The sticky part lay in the fact that Sasha had been given permission to paint Yuuri’s portrait in the spring.  This was electronic but the artist received photos to work from.  So anything from the photos could create doubt.  The sketches in the home, however, violated several privacy laws and could be trademark infringement.  So if Yuuri’s image showed up without their authorization, they had a suit.

 

Victor was not happy, though, because although they had financial recourse, they did not have enough evidence for a restraining order.  Yuuri put into motion the necessary protections for his image, however, and the attorneys made the contacts to the sports management firm and the publicist.

 

When they arrived home, Victor collapsed in the chair and soon had Makkachin in his lap.  He held onto her, threading his fingers through her curls.  Looking up at Yuuri, he caught those worried brown eyes.  “I’ll try and set up another session with Abramovich before Friday.  I think I went backwards after visiting the attorney.”

 

“It wasn’t a total loss.  I _do_ have financial recourse.”

 

“I know better than to be cavalier about my image and by extension, yours.  Misplaced trust,” he grumbled.

 

Yuuri slipped behind his lover and wrapped his arms around the Russian’s shoulders.  “You need to let it go.  What’s done is done.  We have people on this.  Let them do their jobs.”

 

“I know you’re right.  I just…I am still so angry with myself, Yuuri.  If anything were to happen to you…”

 

“Nothing has,” Yuuri reminded him.

 

“But what if…”

 

“We can’t live on _what if’s_.  We have planned for the worst.  Now, let’s hope for the best.  I still feel safe with you.”

 

Victor ran his thumb back and forth down Yuuri’s arm.  “I want to believe that.  In time…maybe.  I just wish there was something else I could do.”

 

* * *

  


Research Sources: 

 

[ Repeated Sexual Assault Victims Face Greater Psychological Consequences ](https://psychcentral.com/news/2014/05/24/repeated-sexual-assault-victims-face-greater-psychological-consequences/70331.html)

[ Reducing the Risk of Revictimization ](http://www.wcsap.org/reducing-risk-revictimization-new-study)

[ Types of Stalking ](https://www.stalkingriskprofile.com/what-is-stalking/types-of-stalking)

[ Short-Circuiting the Victim Selection Process ](http://www.protectivestrategies.com/victim-selection.html)

[ The Nuts and Bolts of Awareness ](http://www.protectivestrategies.com/awareness.html)

[ Issues Regarding the Use of Someone’s Likeness ](http://www.owe.com/resources/legalities/7-issues-regarding-use-someones-likeness/)

[ Artists:  Can You be Sued for Using a Real Person in Your Painting? ](http://www.huffingtonpost.com/daniel-grant/artists-can-you-be-sued_b_1160110.html)

[ Celebrity Trademark ](http://aestheticlegal.com/celebrity-trademark/)

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know…he can change the locks! ;)
> 
> BTW...there is an extra Lifeline...take a look. Sasha's perspective.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Movement of fear...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So much thanks to BluSkates and Magrathea for their edits and plotting. So, now that the plot's afoot, let's move forward.

* * *

 

Entering their room, Yuuri looked around uncomfortably, his arms crossed over his chest and his hands squeezed his upper arms while he shivered.  The peace in their space felt violated.  “Victor, what if…do you think he has something…I don’t know, like a camera?  What if he’s been watching us?”

 

Victor frowned.  He hadn’t wanted to admit that he was thinking of something like this, but now Yuuri had voiced it.  “Well, now that thought is out there, we’re going to have to search the room.”  They began to systematically sort through the room, taking advantage to clean and straighten as they went.

 

Yuuri came out of the closet and, spotting the designer socks sticking out from under the frame,  put his hands on his hips.  “I doubt that he put it under the bed.”

 

Victor scooted out on his stomach and held up a chew toy.  “Yeah, but I’ve been looking for this for weeks.  It’s Makkachin’s favorite.”  The dog perked up from her bed at the mention of her name.  “Makka-girl!  Look what daddy found.  Go get it!”  He tossed it through the door and watched her scramble after it, her claws tapping on the surface in hurried happiness.

 

Yuuri chuckled.  “At least something good came from my panic.”  He sat on the edge of the bed.  “I’m sorry.  I’m being paranoid.”

  
Victor dusted himself off and sat next to him on the bed.  “You are not being paranoid.  After…everything,” he spread his arms wide and shrugged, sighing, “you have every right to be cautious.  Too much has happened this year.”

 

Yuuri leaned against him and Victor wrapped his arms around him.  “Good things have happened, too,” he murmured.

 

“Yes, they did.  I have you,” Victor conceded with a squeeze of his arms.

 

“We have each other,” Yuuri corrected, his hand sliding up Victor’s chest and resting on the curve of his neck.  They remained like that a little bit longer before Yuuri shivered.  Pushing back, he stated, “I can’t do this unless I know he’s not watching.  Let’s keep cleaning.”

 

Yuuri moved to the dresser and then began pulling down the photos.  He dusted each one off before returning them to their place on the wall.  He reached the one above the dresser and stilled.  His body remembered the motion before his mind caught up to it.  He had reached up to this picture severals times, but not the others.  “Vitya, do you know how many times I’ve straightened this picture?”

 

Victor shrugged and went back to what he was working on.

 

“Several times…and you don’t have earthquakes here like we have in Japan.  I didn’t think about it because it’s just something automatic.”  Victor heard the tone in Yuuri’s voice, and walked over to the man, standing just behind him.  He watched Yuuri lift the picture off the wall and study it.  On the back, Yuuri found a corner torn open.  Reaching underneath the paper backing the frame, he worked free a folded piece of drawing paper.  Studying it, he recognized the writing as Cyrillic.  “Vitya, will you translate this so I don’t misread it?”

 

Victor frowned, taking the piece of paper from Yuuri.  “That’s Sasha’s handwriting.”

 

“It was poked into the back of this picture.”

 

Victor’s hand rubbed his beard.  He needed to shave.  But the roughness grounded him as he scanned the paper.  “It’s the…it’s words to a song.”  Victor wrinkled his head studying it.

 

“A song?  What song?”

 

“I think once I told him that sometimes I sang lullabies to you, that they calmed you.  But…I wouldn’t sing this one.  It’s…sad, lonely…about a birch tree.  I don’t know why he put this here.”

 

“How does it go?” Yuuri asked, morbidly curious.

 

“It’s called [ _Beryozka_](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2SeUh5uvK1U) , The Little Birch Tree.”  He lifted his voice and sang the song softly into the evening quiet.  As he closed out the song, he shrugged.  “It doesn’t sound too sad when you sing it.  But the lyrics translate…well, you decide.”  He began to work through the lyrics as Yuuri listened.

 

_ Why do you stand, swaying _

_ Oh slender birch tree _

_ With your head bent _

_ To your very stem? _

_ But across the road _

_ Across a wide river _

_ Similarly lonely _

_ Stands a tall oak tree. _

_ How can I, birch tree, _

_ Clamber over to the oak tree? _

_ I wouldn’t bend and sway then as I do now, _

_ I wouldn’t bend and sway then as I do now, _

_ With my slender branches, _

_ I would lean against him _

_ And with his foliage _

_ I would whisper day and night. _  [ [ Source ](http://blog.vickiboykis.com/2009/02/the-most-depressing-baby-songs-ever-russian-ones/) ]

 

Yuuri frowned as he sat still listening to the words.  “If I ignore the context, which is that a creepy person put it into a frame while in my room, I’d say it’s about yearning to be with someone.”   He paused and frowned.  “Okay, in the creepy context.  I don’t like this, Vitya,” he shivered.

 

“Agreed.  I’ll…put it with the notebook.  Our attorney said to log anything weird that we find or any weird encounters we might have with him.”

 

“So they know who to blame when they find the bodies?” Yuuri asked bitterly, drawing himself in.  “This is just getting weirder and weirder, Vitya.”

 

“But…we didn’t find any cameras,” Victor said with uncertain reassurance.

 

“That just means he was in the same room with me while I was sleeping.  I don’t know which is creepier.”  Yuuri chewed his lip.

 

Victor looked around feeling unsettled himself.  “Let’s go in the other room and talk about this.”

 

Yuuri sat on the sofa and Victor joined him, handing him a snifter with brandy.  “It’ll steady your nerves,” Victor stated.

 

“No vodka?” Yuuri stated with raised eyebrows.

 

“You hate vodka and I drink other things.  So racist,” he teased, although there was an uneasy bitterness in his words.

 

Yuuri turned to cuddle next to him, sipping the drink rather than downing it.  “So, I was sure we’d find something.”

 

“Well, technically we did.  But he could argue that he put that in when he hung the pictures.  The only real evidence we have that he was in our room after that are the sketches…and he can also declare artistic license.  Basically, he drew them while you were on the couch changing the setting.”  He paused, uncertain how to say the next phrase.  “It’s not like he hasn’t been in my bedroom.”

 

Yuuri looked up at him and huffed.  “You had to go there.”

 

“I mean, he stayed here for months while I was gone,” he added in an attempt to salvage the conversation.

 

“I know what you meant, Vitya,” Yuuri stated in irritation.  “You two dated.  He’s lived here off and on since then.  Did you ever wonder why he didn’t make a clean break?”

 

Victor frowned.  “I’m still close to Chris.  I guess I never thought about it.”

 

Yuuri’s irritation was written across his face as he pursed his lips and threw his head back in exasperation.  “Okay, so no cameras.”

 

“And he gave the key back,” Victor stated.

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Do you think we should have the locks changed?”

 

Yuuri did what Yuuri always does and considers the expense and the hassle.  Shaking his head, he answered, “When he tried to get in, it was through the doorman.  They didn’t give him access.  And the notebook was still here, so he didn’t get inside.  If he could still get in, he would have circumvented them, right?”

 

“Yes, I suppose,” Victor said doubtfully.

 

“Do you think it’s necessary?  I mean, he gave back the keys.”

 

“He did give them back…I suppose…”  Victor studied the door.  “And we have the building’s security.”

 

“Exactly.  Let’s finish cleaning the room.  I want to go to bed, Vitya.”

 

Victor nodded uneasily.  He chalked it up to the poem and shoved it to the back of his thoughts.  “Okay, Yuuri.”  He drained his glass and followed Yuuri into the next room.

 

* * *

  
  
  


As the shadows made their way across the room highlighted by the moonlight, Victor was roused out of his dark thoughts by his Yuuri.  Living with Yuuri, Victor had learned how differently they dealt with uneasy thoughts.  Victor would withdraw into himself and try to solve the problem, sometimes opening up and talking it out with someone.  Yuuri avoided the problem.  Like now, when Yuuri kissed along his jaw and whispered his name, “Vitya.”

 

Victor was weak, though, when it came to Yuuri and he quickly succumbed to Yuuri’s demands.  As Yuuri moved over him, straddling him in the darkness, Victor’s hands rested on Yuuri’s hips as he watched Yuuri pull off his shirt and toss it into the floor.  Victor didn’t have a shirt, the room was feeling stuffy.  He felt his lower regions waking up as Yuuri bent down to kiss his lips.  “Yuuri,” he moaned into the kiss, his hands sliding up Yuuri’s back, enjoying the definition provided by his hard work.

 

Victor rocked up into Yuuri and received a soft groan in response.  The older man’s hands slid down to Yuuri’s ass and squeezed as he deepened the kiss further.  He wanted those pants off though, and soon found himself tugging at the waist.  Yuuri chuckled into the kiss and raised up enough for him to push them down over his hips.  Victor never broke the kiss as he followed Yuuri upright.  Yuuri’s hands began working his pants free.

 

Being limber had its benefits.  They had pushed the pants down as far as they could, then their feet took over the task, kicking free of the offending clothes and still never breaking the kiss.  The kiss went from desperately capturing one another’s lips to exploring one another with their tongues, fading back to nibbling each other’s lips returning to hungry little kisses.  Hands explored, sliding down their sides, around their waists and up their backs.  Their hips ground into each other, hungry for friction and not wanting to break from the kiss.  

Everything was sloppy and messy like the desperate making out of teenagers.  Yet they knew each other, knew what they liked, and soon one hand reached down and gathered them both in their palm.  Victor reached down, needing to touch Yuuri as well, and they continued to thrust into their palms swallowing one another’s moans until the quick and dirty sex gave way cries of completion.

 

They finally broke, Yuuri dropping his head to Victor’s shoulder gasping for air.  When he finally lifted his head to look at Victor, the older man brushed Yuuri’s wild and disheveled hair back behind his ears.  “I needed that…to release the tension of the day.”

 

Victor smiled back at him.  “Glad to be of service,” he teased.  “Now, do you want to shower?”

 

Yuuri shoved his hair back and frowned.  “I don’t want to move, but I’ll regret it once I start to itch.”

 

Victor shifted and Yuuri took the hint, rolling off of him and resting flat on his back.  “Come on, Yuuri.  We’ll make it quick.”

 

They slipped under the warm embrace of the water and washed off the sweat and semen, the remnants of the day, and the uneasy feelings.  After drying off, they padded back to the bed hand in hand, not bothering to dress and wrapped up into one another.

 

“ _ Spokoynoy nochi, dorogoy moy _ ,” Victor murmured.

 

“ _ Oyasumi, anata _ ,” Yuuri whispered back burying his head into Victor’s shoulder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Their last words were whispers of good night in their own language. That is if Google translator is speaking truth. ;)
> 
> so...I'm suspecting there are some thoughts...
> 
> ;)


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuri comes over...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, BluSkates and Magrathea, for being my friends, readers, and editors!
> 
> And thanks to all of you who are still reading!

* * *

 

The phone rang as Yuuri cuddled into Victor’s side, neither wanting to move from the couch.  Yuuri reluctantly pulled his cell phone from his pocket then immediately cheered.  “It’s Otousan!”

He quickly answered.  “Papa, how are you?”

 

“I’m good, Yuuchan.  Is Vicchan with you?”

 

“Yes.  He’s right here.  Let me put you on speaker.”

 

“Hello, Papa,” Victor called out.

 

The old man chuckled.  “I just returned from the attorney’s office.  You two have officially closed on the property.  It’s yours.”

 

Victor and Yuuri exchanged excited expressions.  “So what do we do next?” Yuuri asked.

 

“Well, I’d like to have a carpenter over there making repairs if you don’t mind.”

 

Yuuri looked at Victor who nodded with a smile.  “That sounds good.  Are there many?”

 

“Since you both agreed, I’m going to have the electrical and plumbing updated.  Then if you want that soundproofing, we should do that.”

 

Victor laughed softly.  “I think soundproofing is an excellent idea,” Victor answered.

 

“Then we have a place to start.  Other improvements should really wait until you both are here to oversee them.  Did you want to make any changes to the floor plan?”

 

“Nothing major.  I don’t know what we need for the kitchen.  Can you get some ideas from Okaasan?”

 

“Of course.”

 

“Thanks, Papa,” they both called over the phone.

 

“No problem.  I can’t wait until you move back home.”

 

After disconnecting the call, they hugged one another excitedly.   _ They had their inn! _

 

* * *

  
  


After a hard morning’s practice, Yuuri retreated to the studio while Victor moved into practice mode.  Somehow they had found a balance.  Yuuri practiced on the ice in the morning guided by Victor (with Yakov occasionally interjecting).  In the afternoons, Yuuri took the small studio over, working on his own form and helping other skaters.

 

Lilia assigned him Yuri and Mila along with Yakov’s two new novices.  She handled skaters from the other rink coaches in the larger studio.  With his own studio to manage, Yuuri found his place quickly.  It wasn’t unusual for some of the older skaters to come in and work on their form.  Yuuri’s critical eye and skill won the rest of the skaters over and they respected his input.  Yakov appreciated that he could pull some of the workload off of Lilia.

 

Yuuri’s afternoon program moved the teens through stretches then they worked through each choreography.  They would wrap up with working through trouble spots.  Three to four hours later, he’d release them to go to their studies.  Then he had the studio to himself until Victor retrieved him around six.  

* * *

 

 

Having the studio to himself did not always mean solitude.  Often senior level skaters moved in and out during this time talking to Yuuri.  Lilia would consult with him before he left for the day and provide her own eye to his form, mentoring his teaching and studio management skills, and answering questions to any problems he might be struggling with.  Although he was initially afraid of the retired ballerina, he found that she reminded him of Minako in her discipline.

 

“Good evening, Yuuri.  How have today’s group fared?”

 

“They are on track for the most part.  Yura seemed to have something on his mind, though.”

 

She thinned her lips.  “His grandfather went in the hospital.  Yakov and I invited him to stay with us but he refused.”

 

Yuuri considered her words.  “Perhaps he can come to stay with Victor and me.  We have a guest room.”

 

“He’s comfortable with the two of you.  It’s worth a try.”

 

After she left he sat down to finish with stretches while he texted the youth.  

 

**Yuuri/ Do you want to hang out at our place for the next few days?**

 

**Yura/ You heard about grandpa?**

 

**Yuuri/ yes**

 

**Yura/ I’m okay.  I don’t need anyone feeling sorry for me.**

 

**Yuuri/ That’s fine.  I just thought you’d like some space from the dorms and home cooking.**

 

There was a pause.

 

**Yura/ Who’s cooking?**

 

**Yuuri/ Does it matter?  Vitya and I take turns.**

 

**Yura/ Will you help me with my homework?**

 

**Yuuri/ Of course!**

 

**Yura/ Come get me when you leave practice.**

 

A smile twitched at Yuuri’s lips.  Mission accomplished.

 

* * *

  
  


Victor was more than happy when Yuuri told him of their guest.  “I knew something was up but he refuses to talk when he’s upset.”

 

“I noticed that as well.  So you don’t mind?”

 

“Of course not.  Yuratchka is always welcome.”

 

“Maybe he can stay until that uneasiness goes away,” Yuuri mused.

 

“I noticed you were fighting in your sleep last night.”

 

“Too much has happened.  And I need to be more diligent about evening meditation.”

 

Victor slipped an arm around him and ran his hand up and down Yuuri’s back as they walked towards his vehicle.  On the drive to pick up Yuri, he glanced over to see that Yuuri had dozed off.  So he texted Yura who came down fifteen minutes later.

 

“What’s wrong with Katsudon?” he hissed.

 

“He hasn’t been sleeping well.”

 

Yuri frowned.  “Sasha?”

 

“In part.  I’m going to stop and pick up dinner.  Will you stay here with Yuuri?”

 

The youth nodded.  He sat back and disappeared into his phone while Victor negotiated out of the parking lot and onto the highway.  He made two quick stops, leaving Yuri on Yuuri-duty before they arrived home almost an hour later.

  
  


* * *

 

 

Victor nodded over after dinner,  “I noticed you packed well.  How many days are you staying?”

 

“Until I hear from grandpa,” he stated.  

 

“What’s going on?”

 

Yuri shrugged but the look Victor gave him told him he wasn’t buying.  “It’s something with his meds.  He was confused and so they admitted him into the hospital while they make changes.  My uncle is with him.”

 

“Good.  I know you worry, Yuri.”

 

He shrugged frowning.  “I don’t get along with anyone else in the family.  If something happened to him, no one would take me.”

 

“You’ve told me that.  You’ve always got a place with Yuuri and me.”

 

He huffed.  “Yeah...but what happens when you go to Japan?” he accused.

 

Victor smiled warmly.  “You have a room there as well.  Oh, we closed on the property.”

 

“So you’re going to do this?  Open a skate school?”  He failed to hide his interest.  Victor decided to open up more to the blonde about his plans.

 

“Not right away.  There’s a reason Yuuri is apprenticing with Lilia and I’ve been working with Yakov more.  I know Yakov will retire eventually.”

 

“Yeah.  He’s only a few years younger than Grandpa.  I’ll still be skating.”

 

“If you don’t have a place, the offer stands.  We’ll be happy to take you.”  Victor watched him go through a myriad of emotions.  He knew the boy worried.  He and Yuuri both felt attached to him, though, and wouldn’t have him left behind.

 

Yuri stared straight ahead towards the coffee table.  He seemed relieved.  “At least you get me.  It’s good to know I have a place to go.”

 

Victor grinned, and Yuri looked up to catch that twinkle in his eye.  “You can even bring Otabek.”

 

“Oh, god!  What has Katsudon told you?” he demanded, an angry blush painting his cheeks.

 

Victor laughed as he dodged the pillow tossed at him.  “Only that you had company when he stopped by.  He felt bad interrupting your date.”

 

“It wasn’t a date!  I don’t...maybe I don’t like that stuff.”  He shifted uncomfortably chewing on his lip.

 

Victor sobered.  “Grow up in your own time, Yura.  There’s no hurry.”

 

Yuri looked towards the bedroom, worry creasing his brow.  “So about Sasha…”

 

Victor sighed.  “He drew some pictures of Yuuri while he was sleeping.  We found a notebook between the mattress and boxspring in the guest room.  We don’t know if he has others.  Some were...when he was in our room.”

 

Yuri flicked his eyes up.  “I’ll kick his ass, sick bastard.”

 

“Get in line.  I talked with Ivan and Dmitry as well.  I’m worried that he might show up at the rink.  And I needed to find someone to watch Makka when we go to my first competition.”

 

“If I see him…”

 

“You’ll tell an adult,” Victor cut him off.  “I don’t want you hurt and Yuuri would blame himself.”

 

Yuri pouted angrily, cutting his eyes to the side.  “I hear you...but…”  He stared at the door.  “If you need me to hang out here with Katsudon, you’ll tell me.”

 

“Of course.  He’s already comfortable with you and you’re a perfect choice.”

 

“I mean, I can work on homework here.  Geometry.  You’d think I’d be good at it.”

 

“I can relate it to figure skating but sometimes the rules become very complicated.  Yuuri is great at math, though, and he sees things differently.”

 

“You two are ancient.  I bet you took classes out of books!”

 

Victor chuckled.  “Yuuri even went to a classroom.  But yeah.  I had a book and a tutor.  Are the tutorials not working for you?”

 

“For the most part.  I’m just stuck on some things.”

 

“If Yuuri and I can’t help you out, we’ll talk to Yakov about a tutor.  The fund is there.”

 

The little blond pretzeled his legs and huffed.  “I just want to be done already.”

 

Victor raised an eyebrow.  “You have the means.  I mean, it  _ is  _ self-paced.”

 

Yuri yawned.  “I’m going to bed.  Thanks for letting me stay.”

 

Victor called to the retreating back, “Good night, Yura.”  He let him escape.  

  
  


* * *

 

 

Yuuri could hear the buzz of conversation through the door.  He disappeared through the door of their bedroom claiming migraine.  A shower and a restless nap did little to alleviate his symptoms.  He stared at the ceiling.  _  I just don’t feel safe.  I’m sure it’s my anxiety but I can’t settle.  I hope having Yuri around will help.  Three men and two dogs.  Sasha can’t hurt me.   _

 

He glanced at the door.  Victor purchased that lock when they first moved in for his peace of mind.   _ How did he manage to sketch me?  Well, if Victor was home, I wouldn’t have locked the door.  If Victor took the dogs out...but that’s not enough time.  He had to have taken a picture.   _ Yuuri closed his eyes, feeling the shooting pain in his head.   _ He has pictures of me. _

 

_ Lots of fans have pictures of me _ , he mollified.  _  It’s not as if pictures of me aren’t floating around on the internet.  I had Phichit as a roommate.  This shouldn’t bother me.  I’m being ridiculous. _

 

He sighed.  _  I should have told Victor I wanted to change the locks.  But...we’ve already decided.  It’s just my anxiety.  My anxiety and my overactive imagination.  I have Makka and Cocoa and Yuri and Vitya.  It will be fine. _

 

He slowly slipped into a tangled sleep, the torment of his dreams forcing him to fight his blankets.  When Victor came into the room later, he carefully unwrapped Yuuri from the blankets and straightened out the bedding before curling up around Yuuri protectively.  He could feel Yuuri’s stress and anxiety waving off of him even in his sleep.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anxious thoughts and a day out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We see Chris and some future plans. And a day out. I hope you enjoy this!
> 
> Thank you to my friends, BluSkates and Magrathea, for helping me to plan and edit this chapter. Your suggestions help me out so much!

* * *

 

  


Victor watched Yuuri tugging in agitation at the cuffs of his sleeve, a nervous tick that Victor learned indicated anxiety, even when Yuuri was hiding it.  They were seated on the sofa with Yuri on a large square pillow in front, leaning back against the front of the sofa.  The game on the screen fell into the Call of Duty series and Yuuri would call out warnings every so often.  Yuri would grouse back that he saw it.  Yuri had been with them nearly a week at this point, and things were relatively quiet around their home, the youth’s presence taking the edge off Yuuri’s anxiety.  Victor sipped his tea thoughtfully, the book in his lap open but forgotten in the activity.

 

Victor’s attention was on the Japanese man next to him.  He had spotted several indications of Yuuri’s anxiety throughout the week.  He missed jumps that he could normally land with ease.  He became distracted mid-conversation.  His rituals had become more marked, while it was a common practice for Yuuri to lay out his clothes in a specific order at the rink, the process had cropped up at their home as well.  Other, more specified movements appeared, preparing and drinking his teas, very specific layouts of things in various rooms - the bathroom, kitchen, coffee table - and agitation when items were disrupted.  He checked the locks multiple times after they would come home and as they prepared to leave.  But most worrying was his tendency to stare out the window as if lost in thought or searching for something.

 

There were smaller indications as well, such as the fraying of his sleeves.  Cocoa stayed close and when Yuuri would fall to more harmful ticks, such as scratching or pinching his skin, the dog would nose under his hand and Yuuri would turn his attention to her, running his fingers into her curls.  Several times Victor joined Yuuri in the shower only to find it far hotter than necessary.  They said nothing but Victor could see indications of the harmful scrubbing.

 

Victor was worried.  He searched for ways to ease Yuuri’s anxiety, remaining close by.  He had texted Phichit to see if the legendary best friend could work his magic, but as yet there was no discernible change in Yuuri.  And their buffer, Yuri, would be moving back to his dorm soon.  Victor considered having him move over permanently but then again, Victor knew they’d go back to Hasetsu at the end of the season.  His thoughts kept returning to the locks.  He was wondered how they worked on Yuuri’s nerves.  But Yuuri said they were fine.  Victor worried Yuuri would see this as being overprotective and Victor was already hovering too close and giving him little space.  They had already decided, after all.  He shoved that thought back and focused on other ideas.

 

He finally decided on two things.  He reached for his phone and sent a text to Chris.

 

**Chris/ I know I can make time.  Let me check with Peach!**

 

**Victor/ I’d love it if you both could come.  Yuri is leaving in the morning to go back to the dorms.**

 

**Chris/ How bad is he?**

 

Victor stared at the text and glanced up at Yuuri.  He didn’t know what to say.  Finally, his fingers flew through a quick answer.

 

**Victor/ It’s little things.  But all together it’s becoming a mountain.**

 

**Chris/ Have you told Phi?**

 

**Victor/ Yes and I know he’s contacted Yuuri himself.**

 

**Chris/ Let me check with him and see if we can coordinate something.  I would love to see you all.**

 

Victor’s attention returned to Yuuri who seemed lost in thought when a chime pulled his attention.

 

**Chris/ I miss him...and there are some things we need to talk about face to face.**

 

**Chris/ We may bring our own breed of stress.**

 

Victor frowned.  He remember Yuuri mentioned the conflict.

 

**Victor/ Seung-gil?**

 

**Chris/ You’ve heard.  Of course.  That means that Phi has brought it up to Yuuri.  That means it’s not my imagination.**

 

**Victor/ He’s young, Chris.  Younger than Yuuri by three years.  He may just not be ready to settle down.**

 

**Chris/ I know.**

 

**Victor/ You’ve always had open relationships in the past.  What’s changed?**

 

**Chris/ I’ve never felt this way towards someone.  He gets me and he’s not shy.  He’s bold.  He’s fun.  And he’s sexy as hell.**

 

**Victor/ :) This is sounding familiar.**

 

**Chris/ You’re right.  I’m as bad as you.  But...I don’t know if Phi feels the same.  And...I’m afraid to find out.  I don’t want to push him away.**

 

**Victor/ Talk to him.**

 

**Chris/ It needs to be face-to-face and the timing has to be right.  I don’t want to do it during competition season because it will throw us off.  I would never compromise his skating.  Not on purpose.**

 

**Victor/ Then get him to come with you here.  And maybe we can plan a night out where they can dress up.**

 

**Chris/ I love Phi in heels!  When you come this summer, we are all going out in drag.  It’s been so long since I’ve even seen you in a dress.**

 

**Victor/ I cut my hair.  It just didn’t work so well after that.**

 

**Chris/ Get a wig.**

 

**Victor/ hmmm...that’s a thought.**

 

**Chris/ For now, let me see if I can get Phi on board with an earlier visit.  I’ll be in touch.**

 

**Victor/ Spasibo.**

 

Victor unfolded on the couch and leaned forward to kiss Yuuri’s cheek.  “I’m going to start dinner.”

 

Yuuri lifted his brown eyes, smiling.  “Need help?”

 

“No.  You keep back-seat gaming with Yura.”

 

The blonde snorted at that comment.  “You could at least braid my hair while you’re at it, Katsudon.”

 

Yuuri chuckled warmly, leaving the couch long enough to grab a brush and hair ties.  He wove the braid in a french style from the sides and twisted it into a messy knot in the back.  Handing Yuri a mirror, he frowned critically, tugging a few strands free.  “Seriously, Katusdon!  You are doing my hair when we are at the same events.”

 

“If you grow it any longer, I’d like to experiment with the waterfall braid.”

 

Yuri looked at him sharply through the mirror.  “It doesn’t sound badass.”

 

“It would work if you chose a more ethereal program.  It would work with _Agape_.”

 

The youth shrugged.  “We can try it.  It’s not like I can’t take it down if I don’t like it.”

 

Yuuri laughed.  “Exactly.”

 

Dinner flowed into a board game as the evening wore on.  The Yu(u)ris became cutthroat when it came to Monopoly.  Victor used the strategy of pitting one against the other and somehow came out ahead.  As they disappeared to their beds, Victor thought of his other idea.  He and Yuuri needed to go out, something quiet and artistic.

 

* * *

  


It took Victor a few days to secure tickets and during that time, Chris sent a confirmation of a visit.  They all decided to surprise Yuuri.  “You’ve still got the key to my apartment, don’t you?”

 

“It’s still the same?”

 

“Da.”

 

“Then I’ve got it.  We can take a cab from the airport and be there when you get home from practice.”

 

“Good.  I’ve got the tickets for the ballet.  The four of us.  Private box.”

 

“You spoil us!  We look forward to it.  See you then.”

 

Before they would arrive, though, he wanted to take Yuuri out just the two of them...and the dogs.  He decided to take advantage of an off day and take his Yuuri to the [ Summer Garden ](https://www.tripadvisor.com/Attraction_Review-g298507-d305116-Reviews-Summer_Garden_Letny_Sad_and_Summer_Palace_of_Peter_I-St_Petersburg_Northwestern_Di.html#photos;geo=298507&detail=305116&ff=86094800&albumViewMode=hero&aggregationId=101&albumid=101&baseMediaId=86094800&thumbnailMinWidth=50&cnt=30&offset=-1&filter=7&autoplay=).  Rising early, he began packing a picnic.  Yuuri came out of their bedroom and leaned over the counter.  “What’s this?”

 

“I’m taking you out today.  There is a garden that I want you to see before it gets cold.  I thought we’d spend the day exploring it, have a picnic lunch, I’ve got wine.”

 

“Can I bring Cocoa?”

 

“Of course!  I bring Makka when I go.  And I will this time.  It will be a family outing.”

 

Yuuri smiled happily.  “I’ll go get ready!”  Victor watched with a smile as Yuuri practically skipped to the other room.  He chose well.

 

Almost two hours later, they were walking along the path, Victor with a [ backpack ](https://www.amazon.com/Plush-Picnic-Backpack-Compartment-Detachable/dp/B011F2KXG2/ref=pd_lpo_vtph_79_bs_t_1?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=KGTKQQPNHDW0JCTVERQZ) slung over his shoulder.  It held everything they needed for a picnic.  Yuuri had a smaller pack with things for the dogs, collapsable water dishes, water bottles, food containers, treats, a frisbee and a ball.   They had unintentionally coordinated their [ dress ](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/82/1d/4d/821d4dcccc650698c32875bda7212ec9--men-casual-styles-style-for-men.jpg).  Yuuri wore a pair of plum pants with a grey light-weight sweater.  He pulled on a light floral long sleeve button up with pinks and purples in the flowers and a dark charcoal background but ended up pulling it off and feeding the sleeves through his belt loops.  Victor wore gray slacks, a Nordic patterned V-neck long sleeved tee and a deeper plum cardigan.

 

It was public and they knew to restrain their affection, only tangling their fingers when nobody could see them.  They let it be a game and laughed as they slipped into private alcoves, behind the cover of bushes and walls, and ducking down beneath hedges.  The dogs caught their playful attitude and bounded about looking for other places to hide.  Finally, laughing, they collapsed in a private corner and spread their picnic blanket.  Yuuri and Victor first saw to their four legged companions, setting out food and water.  Victor, never one to half-ass a plan, opened the bag to reveal two china plates, silver, and crystal wine glasses.  He poured the wine while Yuuri pulled out the containers of food.  Cheese, bread, different cuts of cold meats, boiled eggs, tomatoes, sliced cucumbers, grapes, and apples.

 

“I can’t believe you put all of this together...and yet I can,” Yuuri commented, his eyes sparkling happily.

 

“I have been planning this for several days now.  I thought we needed a day out.  The gardens are different in the winter.  We’ll have to revisit once more.”

 

“I’m not sure I’m prepared for Russia in winter.”

 

Victor chuckled.  “Don’t worry.  I’ll get you properly outfitted.”

 

After he finished eating, Yuuri laid back lazily watching the clouds.  “Thank you, Vitya,” he murmured.  I did need this.”

 

*NOTE:  I never found whether or not dogs were permitted at the Summer Garden.  However, I thought I found a photo that might have shown a dog.  I decided that was proof enough.  So I let Makka and Cocoa come along without reprise.  If I’m wrong, let it be creative license.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you haven't checked them out, pop on over to read [Memories are the Only Real Ghosts](http://archiveofourown.org/works/11554047/chapters/25949061)   
>  by BluSkates and [The Longest Hours ](http://archiveofourown.org/works/11770173/chapters/26534583) by Magrathea. These are both stories worth your time. 
> 
> And drop down and give us a shout in the comments! We all love them.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little fussing and fluff.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ;) For BluSkates and Magrathea, thank you for being a friend...for all of the edits and discussion.

* * *

 

 

Yakov sent Victor home the previous day and ordered him to take a day of rest to get over his cold.  Yuuri took care of him that night, making him soup and tea, fussing over him for having no medication in the flat.  He left, going down the street to the nearby pharmacy, returning with what Victor needed to get through the day.  The next morning, he got up and made breakfast, insisting the older man drink herbal tea and take echinacea.  Picking up the keys, he headed towards the door.

 

“I can drive you,” Victor whined.

 

Yuuri raised an eyebrow.  “That defeats the purpose of staying home sick.”

 

“You’ve never driven in Russia,” Victor argued.

 

Yuuri huffed.  “And whose fault is that?  I drove in Japan.  I drove in Detroit.  I can drive here.”

 

Victor pouted.  “Just be careful.”

 

“Of course, Vitya,” Yuuri answered, his jaw set.

 

“And call me when you get there!” Victor called after him as he walked out the door.

 

Yuuri raised a hand and waved him off.  “Whatever, dad!”

 

“You’ve spent way too much time with Yura!” Victor accused.

 

Yuuri rolled his eyes and kept going.

 

Victor, still pouting, returned to his couch, wrapping up in his blanket.  Netflix came to his rescue with his guilty pleasure.  He smiled as the theme song came on.  “Thank you for being a friend…”  He had managed, through strenuous effort, to keep this secret from both Yuuri and Phichit while living in Detroit, sneaking in episodes when the others were gone.  He was soon caught up with Rose’s cluelessness and Blanche’s latest date.  Dorothy, always the voice of reason, tried to maintain the peace while Sophia instigated trouble.

 

He dozed off and on, starting a new episode when he woke up.  However, he was half asleep when Yuuri walked through the door.  Victor’s cheeks turned pink as he scrambled for the remote.  Yuuri’s eyebrows rose as he turned to see what was on the television.  “I half expected to see porn with the way you were scrambling to cover up.   _ Golden Girls _ , Vitya?”

 

Victor dropped his chin guiltily, caught.  “I started watching it in Detroit,” he confessed.

 

“And you kept this a secret?  Does our love mean nothing to you?” Yuuri exclaimed dramatically.

 

“I realize that this would lower your view of me.”

 

Yuuri tapped the back of his head.  “You idiot!  Phichit and I would sing the  _ Golden Girls _ theme song while we studied at night.”  He reached his arms around the taller man.  “There are worse vices you can have.  Now why don’t I make you some soup.”

 

“Can I have grilled cheese as well?” he pouted.

 

“With your cold?  Are you crazy?” Yuuri called back.  “No dairy!”

 

“There’s borscht left over from the other night,” he called back weakly.

 

Yuuri brought him a bowl of the leftover soup with an indulgent dollop of sour cream.  “That’s all the dairy you get.  Enjoy it.”  He settled at the other end of the sofa with his own bowl cradled in his hand.  “Are you going to put it on the next episode?”

 

Victor grinned.  “Sure!”  They spent the evening companionably watching Victor’s guilty pleasure and laughing at the girls’ antics.

 

“This is what Yuuko’s girls are going to be like,” Yuuri stated at one point.

 

“Does that make Yuuko Sophia?”

 

Yuuri considered it.  “Possibly.  There may be a first generation  _ Golden Girls  _ with my sister, Minako, and Yuuko.”

 

“Minako is Sophia.”  Victor watched a little longer before he commented, “Chris is Blanche.”

 

Yuuri looked over at him.  “Well, duh!  So who is Rose?”

 

Victor thought hard on that question.  Finally, he determined, “It would be JJ.  No one wants to hear his stories and once he tells them we all just stare at him dumbfounded.”

 

“Oh, God!  I am not living in a retirement house with JJ!”

 

Victor grinned.  “Of course not.  It will be the two of us, Chris and Phichit.  Yurio and Otabek will have to take care of us.”

 

“You’ve doomed us to some sort of hell.”

 

“Yura takes good care of his grandpa,” Victor argued.

 

“Because he loves him.  I’m not sure if we rank that level of love.”

 

“We’ll see,” Victor stated, a smile on his lips.

  
  


* * *

  
  
  


The next morning, Victor felt better.  As they walked out to their car, he asked, “How did the drive go yesterday?”

 

“It was fine until I picked up Yura.  He insisted on driving the rest of the way,” Yuuri stated nonchalantly.

 

“What!”

 

"He only sideswiped a sign.  Barely noticeable," Yuuri deadpanned.

 

Victor gasped.  "I know you are lying.  You must be lying.  You wouldn't let a fifteen-year-old drive," he pushed reassuringly.

 

"Maybe.  I mean you did give me shit yesterday," Yuuri grinned, cutting his eyes to the side.  Victor still eyed the paint as they approached the vehicle. “You are very suspicious of my driving.  It’s not like I haven’t driven you before.  And _I_ have been driving since fourteen...although mom doesn't know.”

 

Victor frowned.  “Fourteen?!! And I worried more about the signs.  And you don’t have a license.”

 

Yuuri tilted his head.  “Mari.  She would sneak me behind the wheel when we ran errands.  Yesterday I went the route you always took.  I knew what the signs said because of how you drove.  I actually drove two years in Detroit before I got my driver’s license.  But I suppose I should study up so I can drive here.”

 

“It wouldn’t hurt.  I don’t mind driving but you never know when you’ll need to take the wheel.  I mean, if we’re drinking, then we take a cab.”

 

“That was the rule in college, too.  Otherwise, yes, I do think I need to get a license.  Just like you need to get one for Japan.”

 

They stopped at the dorms and soon two teens piled in.  “I see the old man is back,” Yuri commented.

 

Mila giggled.  “As long as I don’t have to walk.”

 

* * *

  
  
  


Victor moved slowly but got through his day.  Yakov still sent him home early.  So at three, Yuuri wrapped up at the studio and loaded everyone up.  Snagging Victor’s keys, he pushed him to the passenger side.  “You’re eyes are glossy.  Too much cold medication.  I’m the safer option.”

 

“Yes, mom,” Victor returned snippily.

 

Yuuri raised an eyebrow even as the two teens giggled.  “Does that make you dad, old man?”  Victor gave the blonde a playful shove.

 

Dropping the kids off, they arrived back in their apartment.  Yuuri sent Victor to bed.

 

* * *

  
  


Victor woke up to a dark apartment and no sign of Yuuri or the dogs.  Throwing his clothes back on, he texted Yuuri as he walked towards the elevator.  No response.  He asked the doorman and was told that the other man gone out a couple of hours ago.  Victor grimaced and paced the lobby for a few moments.  Finally he received a response.

 

**Yuuri/ Sorry.  I was running and lost track of time.**

 

**Victor/ We agreed you wouldn’t go without me.**

 

**Yuuri/ I was stir crazy.  I have both dogs.**

 

Victor huffed.  He wasn’t happy.

 

**Victor/ Which way did you go?**

 

**Yuuri/ towards the park**

 

**Yuuri/ I’m fine.  Go to bed.**

 

**Victor/ Meet me at the statue.**

 

Victor caught up to him, his cheeks flushed.  Yuuri didn’t look happy.  “I’m fine.  I can do things by myself.”

 

“I disagree.  Too much has happened.  And you promised.”

 

Yuuri frowned.  “I can’t hide all the time.”

 

Victor grabbed Yuuri’s hands.  “No, you can’t.  I agree.  But I don’t know what Sasha is going to do.  I don’t know where the ones who attacked you are located and when they will make the next move.  When I don’t know where you are, I’m terrified.”

 

“When will all of this be over?  When do I get to be myself?”  He leaned into Victor.

 

Victor leaned his cheek against his partner’s head.  “I wish I knew.  I’m sorry I’m protective but in this case, I don’t think it’s overprotective.”

 

Yuuri sighed.  “Let’s go home.  I’m not in the mood to be out anymore.”

 

Victor guided Yuuri back.  The other man was quiet, withdrawn and Victor couldn’t help the guilt.  As they entered, the doorman met Victor.  “Mr. Nikiforov.  That other man.  The one that used to live in your apartment.  He stopped by once more.”

 

“Did you let him in?”

 

“The manager intercepted him.  He was sent away.  I just thought you should know.”

 

Yuuri looked up at Victor with wide eyes.  They continued to their apartment.  Yuuri shuffled his feet as they removed their outerwear and released the dogs from their harnesses and leashes for the night.  “I’m sorry, Vitya.  I...thought if I ignored it, I wouldn’t be afraid.”

 

Victor pulled him into his arms.  “Don’t be sorry, Yuuri.  We are both reacting to this situation.  Now, let’s make something to eat and rest.  Okay?”

 

Yuuri nodded, but he still remained quiet for the rest of the evening no matter how Victor tried to draw him out.  As they settled into bed, Yuuri lay on the opposite side until Victor reached for him.  “Don’t stay so far away.”

 

Yuuri sniffed.  “I messed up,” he sputtered.

 

Victor pulled him into his arms.  Brushing his lips into Yuuri’s hair.  “You didn’t mess up.  This whole situation is messed up.  But we are going to help each other.  We’re going to keep you safe.”

 

“I hate being scared.  Sometimes I just want everything back to normal.  I want to go running, to follow my own feet to the rink, to be able to stay as late as I want.  I want it to be safe for me to go there after hours.  I want this to all be over.”

 

“I know,  _ lyubov moy _ .  I know.  Let’s keep working together to get through this.”

 

“I don’t like fighting, Vitya.  I...was mad at myself.”

 

“I’d rather you be mad at me.  You are harder on yourself then you’d ever be to me.”

 

Yuuri turned into his arms and buried his head into Victor’s shoulder.  “I still have nightmares,” he confessed.  “I’m just better at hiding it.”

 

Victor kissed his hairline.  “No, love, you aren’t.  I just hold you when you cry in your sleep.  I saw no point in mentioning it.  I hoped you forgot them.”

 

Yuuri sniffed.  “I’m not as together as I seem.  Some days I’m just falling apart.  I didn’t...want to be a burden.”

 

“We’ve gone through this.  You are never a burden to me.  I love you and I want to know what’s going on.  Talk to me, Yuuri.”

 

“Today.  You were asleep and the walls started closing in.  I didn’t plan to go for a run but once I was outside, I started to run.  I kept going until...I could stop.”

 

“Were you afraid?”

 

“I...don’t think so?  But I couldn’t settle down.”

 

“We need to find you a safer outlet.  Okay?”

 

Yuuri nodded, sniffing back.  Victor lifted his partner’s chin and brushed his lips over Yuuri’s.  “Are you okay now?”

 

Yuuri’s eyes flicked down.  “N-not really.  B-but I don’t know what to do about it.”

 

“Do we need to schedule an extra  counseling appointment?”

 

Yuuri shook his head.  “I’ll be fine.  I’m just having a bad day.  And I spent the day hiding it.”

 

“You never have to hide it from me.”

 

Sniffing, Yuuri nodded.  “I know.  You were sick.  I just wanted you to rest.  It all just sort of fell apart.  I’ll do better.”

 

“Baby, it’s not about doing better.  You are blaming yourself.  I don’t want that.  I want you to feel safe.  I want you to not second guess yourself.  I want you to be able to tell me when you’re having a bad day.”

 

Yuuri was still, listening.  Finally, he murmured, “I might be able to work on the last one, Vitya.  The rest...I don’t think those are in your control.  I know they aren’t in mine.”

 

Victor kissed his forehead.  “One out of three.  I guess that’s better than nothing.  Talk to me even when I’m sick.  You are always my priority.”

 

“I was trying to make you my priority.”

 

“And that’s fine...as long as you’re okay.  But when you’re not, we need to deal with both problems together, okay?”

 

Yuuri nodded, snuggling up to him.  “I think I’ve hit my crash, Victor.  Can I sleep it off, now?”

 

“Yes, love.  Sleep.  I’ve got you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this bit of warmth. ;)


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chris and Phichit arrive!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much to Bluskates and Magrathea for taking care of me with the edits and such!

* * *

 

Yuuri leaned on Victor as they took the short walk to the apartment door.  “Today’s practice was brutal.”

 

“You should have had Yakov for a coach,” Victor quipped.

 

Yuuri arched an eyebrow disbelieving.  “Essentially, I have you, Yakov, and Lilia supervising my training.  And every one of you is particular.”

 

Victor hummed in response.  “I suppose you have a point.”

 

Cocoa whined next to the door and then barked, drawing Yuuri down to kneel next to her as Victor worked the lock.  “What’s wrong, girl?  Do you miss Makka?”

 

The door open and a shout of surprise greeted them.  Yuuri screamed, Phichit squealed, and both of the older men who had cooked up this scheme were rewarded as they watched their boyfriends jumping up and down in one another’s embrace, crying.  “What are you doing here?” Yuuri finally managed.

 

“Victor and Chris planned it.  A last get together before the season starts,” Phichit explained, pulling Yuuri into the room.

 

“I’ve missed you so much!”

 

“So have I.  I didn’t realize how hard it would be without my best friend.”

 

Yuuri huffed.  “You make friends easily,” he protested.

 

“True...but you’re my BEST friend.  I really missed you.”

 

Yuuri tugged his fingers through his hair.  “Oh, I just realized I need a shower.  Do you mind?”

 

“Of course not,” Phichit laughed, letting him go.  Yuuri headed towards the bedroom door then ran back to hug him once more before finally disappearing into the bedroom.

 

Victor walked into the kitchen with Chris.  “How was your trip?”

 

“It was good.  Did you arrange ice time for us?” Chris answered focusing on important matters first.

 

“Of course.  I wouldn’t be a good host if I neglected the most basic needs of my guests.  Yakov said the rink can absorb both of you.  In fact, the day after tomorrow, I’ll have the four of us on the ice alone and we can critique each of our programs.”

 

“I can always use an extra set of eyes,” Chris agreed.

 

“You don’t mind?” Phichit asked, plopping onto the barstool next to Chris.

 

Victor arched an eyebrow in amusement.  “Have I ever minded?  You basically let me crash at your and Yuuri’s place for several months.  Besides, I want to hear what you see in my programs as well.”  Victor put out a cutting board and chef’s knife.  Soon, he was dicing and chopping vegetables.

 

“It was for Yuuri,” Phichit replied flippantly, studying his nails.  “I will put up with the worst of divas for Yuuri.”

 

Victor and Chris both chuckled.  “I don’t know if _I’m_ the worst diva or if you are dating him,” the Russian returned.

 

“So what’s for dinner?” Phichit asked curiously.

 

“You’ll have to ask Yuuri.  I’m just prepping the veggies,” Victor stated mysteriously.

 

As if on signal, Yuuri came out of the bedroom, his wet hair combed back from his face.  “All yours, Vitya.”  Yuuri tied on an [ apron ](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/55/cb/e4/55cbe49a6795c7f7a776d3833d0a7752--cute-aprons-flirty-aprons.jpg)before reaching up and pulled out a wok and started heating some oil.  “I should have known Vitya had plans for company when he suggested hotpot.”

 

“[ Hotpot ](http://thewoksoflife.com/2015/10/hot-pot/)?  Really?”  Phichit drummed excitedly at the bar.  “I haven’t had your cooking in so long!”

 

“Well, if you come see us when we are off season, you’ll learn that Victor and I cook quite often.” Yuuri responded, turning to reveal the blue and black glam apron he stole from Victor’s collection.

 

The Thai man’s eyes widened.  “Oh, my gosh!  What are you wearing!” he exclaimed as he quickly snapped a shot.  Phichit exchanged excited glances with Chris as he uploaded a picture to instagram entitled [Chef Yuuri].  “I’m definitely planning to be there,” he added.

 

“Victor apparently collects aprons,” Yuuri responded nonchalantly.  His phone started buzzing with notifications and Yuuri raised an eyebrow accusingly towards Phichit.  “You had to tag me in that,” he deadpanned.  Turning, he raised an eyebrow towards Chris.  “And you?  Will you be joining us this spring?”

 

The Swiss grinned warmly.  “I wouldn’t miss it.”  He watched Yuuri transfer the soup base over to the pot on the hotplate he had set up on the bar.  Yuuri quickly mixed up the dipping sauce then unloaded the items for cooking into the hotpot spreading them out on the bar just in time for Victor to emerge from the shower.  “That may be the quickest shower you’ve ever taken, Vitya,” his hazel eyed friend commented.

 

Victor grinned.  “Hotpot,” as if that said it all.  Victor popped open a sweet wine.  “Sweet with spicy,” he explained and placed another nearby.  Pouring the glasses, he served both of their guests first then Yuuri and himself.

 

“We may want water, too,” Yuuri suggested.  “The spicy version packs a punch.”

 

Soon they were gathered around the bar dipping bits of food into the broth and enjoying the meal and company.  Yuuri was feeling tipsy by the time he adjourned to the sofa while Victor and Chris cleaned up.

 

Phichit shifted uncertainly.  “I should help,” he protested.

 

Chris shook his head.  “You had the longest flight.  Go rest and catch up with Yuuri.  Vitya and I have this.”

 

Phichit nodded, grabbing his glass and the open bottle to join his friend.  Refilling Yuuri’s glass, they settled back to talk about their lives.

 

“Seung-gil has been contacting me a lot,” Phichit murmured.  “I was sitting next to Chris waiting for our flight when he sent the last message.  I swear Chris stiffened up.”

 

“You can’t date two men unless everyone agrees,” Yuuri pointed out.

 

“Chris and I aren’t exclusive,” Phichit argued.

 

Yuuri raised an eyebrow.  “And if Chris started talking with some other guy, you wouldn’t be alarmed?”

 

“No,” Phichit insisted.  “He had a boyfriend when we started sleeping together.  He does open relationships.”

 

“People change.  I just don’t want you to regret this,” Yuuri warned.

 

Phichit huffed, frowning momentarily before his usual smile fell back into place.  “So, I was told to bring something for a formal night.  Do you know the plan?”

 

Yuuri raised an eyebrow.  “I didn’t even know you were coming.  So perhaps Vitya will clue us in when he joins us.”

 

Phichit’s eyes danced excitedly.  “So, I guess we are staying in the guest room.  Come with me and we can talk while I unpack.”

 

Yuuri followed Phichit down the hall that led to the guest room and bathroom.  Taking a left, they opened the guest room.  Phichit walked in and didn’t notice Yuuri froze at the door at first.  Looking back, his eyebrows furrowed.  “What’s wrong?”

 

“I-I haven’t been in here.  This was his room,” Yuuri whispered.

 

Phichit’s eyes widened.  “Oh,” he replied softly.  “Are you okay?  We can go back to the sofa.”

 

Yuuri’s eyes blinked rapidly and he looked from one surface to the next, feeling his breathing quicken and he failed to notice Victor coming up behind him.  “Come back with me, _lyubov moya_ ,” he murmured, his hand sliding around Yuuri’s waist, grounding him and pulling him away.  Chris lingered watching them go.

 

“I didn’t think about this room upsetting him,” Phichit hissed.

 

“Sasha is a piece of work.  I tried to convince Victor to cut him off for years.  He...manipulates the reality of situations.  And I think he believes his own interpretations and outright lies.  Vitya and I would fight about how he would insert himself into our time even when we were dating.  I knew this wasn’t going to end well.”

 

“Yuuri said there were pictures,” Phichit murmured, his frown returning as he allowed Chris to guide them back to the living room.

 

“There were,” Victor stated quietly and Phichit realized he wasn’t quiet enough.  At this point they were all sober, faced with the decision to dive into this grim reality or to avoid it.  Victor sighed and finally said, “Let’s talk about it rather than hide in whispers.  I’ll go get it and show you.”

 

“I don’t want to see it,” Yuuri stated dully, curling up into his part of the couch.  Victor handed the sketchbook over before wrapping himself around Yuuri.

 

Phichit’s eyebrows kept climbing as he moved through the notebook.  “These are really creepy.  If you didn’t sign a model release, he should be liable.”

 

“Oh, trust me, there was no permission given,” Yuuri stated bitterly.  “We handed it over to the attorney.  If he tries to do a gallery show with them, then yeah, we can do something.  If he tries to sell them, we have grounds.  Otherwise, it’s just personal fanart.  Creepy, but private, and unfortunately, not illegal.”

 

“Wow,” Phichit replied.  “It was ground into us to get model releases.  But...I suppose we were doing work with the idea that it would be shown in a gallery or published.”

 

“Exactly.  So we’re stuck...but Victor kept it in case he crosses a line.  And we are documenting everything.  We know of at least two times he’s tried to come back here.”

 

“Have you thought about changing the locks?” Chris suggested.  “I know I used my old key.”

 

Yuuri met Victor’s eyes uncertainly.  “We talked about it, but the building has security so we decided against it,” he admitted.

 

Phichit huffed.  “We changed the locks after Craig.  If it would help, you should do it.”

 

Victor leaned over to look at Yuuri.  “I can make a phone call and we can make it happen.”

 

Yuuri drew in.  “I’m tired of having to change things to accommodate people who are trying to hurt me.  Why won’t people just leave me alone?”  He pushed Victor away and walked pointedly into the bedroom, slamming the door behind him.

 

Victor frowned.  “Well, that went well.”

 

Phichit nodded.  “Let him stew on it.  Maybe he will come around.”

 

“So give him space.  I feel like that’s been the game plan for a while.  He gets upset, I back off.  I feel like I should force this issue.”

 

Phichit took a sip of his wine and considered the reactions he witnessed since he arrived.  “It should be fine while we are here.  Let him cool off and bring it up subtly later.”

 

“I know he hates to feel weak, hates to be coddled.  But that’s not what this is about,” Victor argued.  “He has...nightmares.  They’ve been worse since this happened.”

 

“You could just change them and give him the new keys,” Chris suggested.

 

Both Victor and Phichit turned and stared at Chris.  “He would be pissed,” Phichit pointed out.

 

“Yeah, he would,” Victor agreed.

 

They parted shortly towards their different bedrooms.  Victor cautiously opened the door.  From the light that peeked through the opening, he could see Yuuri’s form curled up in the smallest of balls.  He glanced back to see the other two gone and turned off the lights, herding the dogs into the bedroom before he shut the door.

 

Removing his clothes efficiently, he dropped them in the hamper, frowning when he found Yuuri’s on the floor.  This was not like him.  He reached down  and picked them up putting them away as well.  Glancing towards the form, he felt Yuuri needed barriers.  So he pulled a pair of pajamas bottoms and a t-shirt from the drawer.  Once properly attired, he crawled under the covers giving Yuuri some space.

 

Reaching across, he placed his hand on Yuuri’s hip, using the bedding as another barrier.  “My Yuuri,” he murmured.  He heard a sniff in reply.  At least he wasn’t pretending to be asleep.  “I’m sorry.  I had no intention to bring up the locks.”

 

Yuuri slowly unfolded on himself and rolled on his back.  “Victor, why do these things keep happening to me?  I must put something out there that says I’m an easy target.”

 

“I’ve been reading up on what Dr. Abramovich was telling you about erotomania.  You didn’t do anything, Yuuri.  He created this whole thing in his mind.  And, if I’m honest with myself, he’s been good at hiding it.”

 

“When he was moving out that day, his friends kept side-eying me like I did something.”

 

“We have no idea how he presented this to other people.  He could have told them that I stole you from him for all we know.  I felt a number of heated stares myself.”

 

“I just wish he’d leave us alone...completely.  Why does he keep stopping by?  Is it the notebook?”

 

“Perhaps.”

 

“Maybe we should just give it to him.”

 

“Would that make you feel better?  More at ease?  Your sleep has been chaotic.”

 

Yuuri frowned.  “No, it wouldn’t.  He’s probably using the notebook as an excuse.”

 

“What can I do?  I don’t care what the cost is or how inconvenient it might be,” he offered, hoping Yuuri would say the locks with his indirect opening.

 

Yuuri shifted into Victor’s arms and rested his head on Victor’s shoulder.  “At this point, I don’t know.  I just want a normal life where I didn’t have to worry about these things.  I...want to look at the other offerings at the clinic.  Dr. Abramovich talked about classes.  I think there was a self-defense class in that listing.  Maybe if I took that, I’d feel...more empowered?”

 

Victor nodded against Yuuri’s head.  “Okay.  We’ll talk to him about it during our next session.  Is there anything else?” he prodded gently.

 

Yuuri tightened his arms around Victor but hesitated. _I can’t say the locks, not after making such a huge fucking deal about it_ , he thought.  What he said was, “Let’s just try that.”

 

Victor sighed, hugging him back.  “Okay.  Whatever you want, Yuuri.  If you think of something else, please don’t hesitate to ask.”

 

* * *

  


As Chris and Phichit snuggled up together, the older man told the younger, “Victor wants me to help him remove Sasha’s paintings.  He wants them out of here.  But he is hoping you and Yuuri could do something together while we are doing it.”

 

“A friend date,” Phichit suggested.

 

“Exactly.  We’ve got the evening planned, but perhaps you two can go to lunch together.  Give us a couple of hours to clear the paintings.”

 

“What’s he going to do with them?”

 

“Send them to an auction house.  I understand that Yuuri supports a charity for figure skaters.”

 

Phichit smiled softly and nodded.  “Yes, he does.  This is a good plan.  I’ll help with the distraction ploy.  Perhaps the paintings are an added reminder of Sasha’s presence.  He was really freaked out earlier.”

 

“I noticed,” Chris agreed.  “If we can help Yuuri to be more at ease, then this trip was worth it.”

 

“I guess I’ll have to work my magic,” Phichit smiled as he stared towards the ceiling in the darkness.  He turned and snuggled into Chris and the older man soon had him responding to his kisses and touch.  “Chris…” he cried out softly in the dark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, yeah...about those locks...


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Friend date and a boys night out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much to my writerly friends BluSkates and Magrathea for the support and edits!

* * *

 

 

Yuuri led Phichit to the table.  “This is one of our favorite places to eat.  The owner is related to Yakov and he’ll bring us whatever he sees fit but it’s always delicious.”

 

“So no need to speak Russian?” Phichit surmised.

 

Yuuri nodded then shrugged.  “I’m getting better, though.  More confident in the words.  I find that people are patient when you are trying to speak their language.  Victor learning Japanese is more of a struggle.  He studies diligently but sometimes it’s frustrating juggling so many alphabets and the nuances of the language.  I asked him how he picked up French and English and he told me they were electives in school.  He chose English because of figure skating and French because he became friends with Chris.”

 

“And now he’s learning Japanese because of you,” Phichit added with a smile.

 

A blush stained Yuuri’s cheeks as he acquiesced.  “So what’s going on with you?”

 

Phichit offered a rare frown.  “I don’t know.  I’m...confused?  Am I allowed to be confused?”

 

Yuuri chuckled.  “That’s so much my territory but yes, you are allowed to be confused.  Have you talked to Chris about it?”

 

Phichit sighed and he felt tears sting his eyes, which brought a similar response from Yuuri as he reached across the table.  “I don’t want to hurt him.”

 

Yuuri thinned his lips, holding the Thai’s warm eyes.  “I’m going to let you in on a secret.  He’s hiding it well but when you aren’t looking, I see it.  He’s hurting.  He knows you are torn and he’s not sure where he stands in all of this.  He doesn’t want to lose you but he’s afraid if he holds too tight, you’ll bolt.”

 

“I’ve never been involved so long with a single person,” Phichit confessed.  Throwing his hands up to cover his face, he blew through his lips in frustration.  “If only Seung-gil never sought anything more than friendship…”

 

“What exactly has occurred between you and Seung-gil?” Yuuri asked carefully.

 

Phichit pulled his hands down and held Yuuri’s eyes earnestly.  “Nothing.  I mean we talk.  Mostly text.  He...he doesn’t have many friends.  The one that killed himself, it was the closest he’s gotten to anyone in some time.  He tends to prefer to be alone.  He has a dog, and for the most part he’s been happy.  But after looking after his friend, he’s a little lost.  And I suppose that’s kind of fallen on my shoulders.”

 

Yuuri hummed, tapping his fingers on the table in front of him.  “From what you’ve told me, it sounds like he’s asked to be your friend.  Are you sure you aren’t reading more into it than what is there?”

 

Phichit frowned.  “I don’t know?”

 

Yuuri sighed and squeezed Phichit’s hand.  “Are you certain he’s even gay?  I know I’ve seen him and Sara together when he was drunk.”

 

“He pushes women away, though.  You’ve seen him.  When he’s not drinking, he’s pretty cold.”

 

“Kind of like how I used to be,” Yuuri pointed out.  “It might be how he deals with the public life.”

 

“So I could be risking everything for something that isn’t there,” Phichit concluded softly.

 

Yuuri sighed.  “The dream of someone is rarely true to the reality.  I never imagined Victor to be the warm, affectionate person he is to me.  I know you’ve liked him for a long time.  But Chris is here, in the present.  And he does care a lot for you.”

 

Phichit ran his hand through his hair in frustration.  “And I care a lot for him.  I just...I don’t feel ready to settle down.”

 

“Then tell him.”

 

* * *

  
  


Back at the apartment, Chris held the ladder as Victor climbed up to pull the highest painting down.  They had made quick work of the project.  Climbing down, they put the painting in the crate provided by the auction house.  They would pick it up in a couple of days.  The entire transaction was already arranged.

 

“This one with Yuuri.  I think I should ask Yuuri first.  I don’t know how he feels about that image going out to the public,” Victor commented.

 

Chris pursed his lips.  “You may be right.  It can’t hurt to ask.”

 

“It’s been so difficult lately.  Sasha has really put our relationship through the wringer.”  Victor caught Chris’ eyes and added, “I know.  You warned me.  I just...I failed to see him for what he was.  I hate that it took him becoming a threat to my Yuuri in order for me to see it.”

 

“Yuuri doesn’t seem to resent you for it,” Chris observed.

 

Victor shrugged.  “Not outright.  He just...he’s not comfortable like in Detroit.  He was attacked in his own home in Detroit and he was more comfortable there.”

 

“What is it different?”

 

Victor sighed.  “Yuuri let Phichit change the locks.  Why is this such a big thing to him?”

 

“Phichit told me last night that sometimes with Yuuri the smallest thing can become a roadblock to him.  You are in counseling, right?”  After Victor’s nod, Chris continued, “You might bring it up to the counselor.  See if it’s something they can work through.”

 

“I guess I can try,” Victor agreed.

 

A rattle at the door informed the other two men that their boyfriends had arrived home.  Yuuri was giggling as they opened the door and Victor couldn’t help the smile that spread across his face.  He loved seeing Yuuri happy above all other things.  

 

Yuuri stilled as he took in the sight, his eyes wide.  “Victor?”

 

“I-I didn’t want to see constant reminders of his presence.  I hope you don’t mind,” Victor murmured in explanation, his head dropping uncertainly.

 

Yuuri stepped forward into his space, his hand sliding up over Victor’s cheek, the tips hiding beneath the silver fringe.  “Of course not.  I just didn’t know you were thinking this.”

 

“I’m sending them to auction.  The proceeds are going to your charity.  I don’t want any money from it.”

 

“Oh, wow.  Okay,” Yuuri responded.  “At least some good can come of it.”

 

Victor smiled weakly.  “I just...the painting of you.  Do I send it or keep it or…” he trailed of uncertainly.

 

Yuuri frowned.  It was such a private moment caught in the painting.  “I don’t want to see it,” he confessed.  “But...I don’t want anyone else to have it, either.”

 

Victor nodded in agreement.  “I’ll have it stored away, then.  Okay?”

 

“Okay,” he said softly, dropping his head to Victor’s shoulder.  The older man tightened his arms around him.

 

They parted after a few moments, realizing they weren’t alone.  Yuuri glanced over towards their friends, his cheeks dusted pink.  “I’m sorry,” he murmured.

 

Chris waved off the apology.  “Not at all.  We’re friends.”

 

Yuuri smiled gratefully.  “So what do we have planned tonight?  I know you and Victor have cooked something up.”

 

Victor chuckled.  “Well, I was hoping you would be agreeable to a night at the ballet.  I have tickets to a private box, so it will be just us.”

 

Yuuri’s expression blossomed into excitement and he spotted the slight bounce in his heels.  “I’d love to go to the ballet!  What is the production?”

 

“ _ Anna Karenina _ ,” Victor stated.  “Lots of emotional angst.”

 

“It will be beautiful.  Oh, Phi...we need to decide on what we will wear.”  Yuuri moved over to grab his friend’s hand and squeezing it excitedly.  As the two disappeared to their rooms, Victor thought about how quickly the atmosphere shifted.

 

* * *

  
  
  


Phichit tapped on Yuuri’s door and the older man opened it to welcome his friend.  “So I was thinking something in  [ purple ](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/90/7b/be/907bbeb1f3270f33abeba543aee369b3.jpg) ,” the Thai man announced as he entered the bedroom before unveiling the glittered pencil skirt.  

 

Yuuri nodded thoughtfully.  “I think I have just the complement.”  He disappeared into the closet and after a few minutes emerged with a soft purple plunge neck  [ dress  ](https://www.polyvore.com/formal_outfit/set?id=215706301) accented in sequins.  The scallop that trimmed the neck dipped low eliciting a whistle from his friend.  “And I have these shoes,” Yuuri added revealing silver two piece pumps.  

 

“So much sparkle, Yuuri,” Phichit responded, his eyes glowing.  “I have my black patent pumps with the gold heels.  My shirt is black sleeveless with a cowl neck.  So that should work nicely.”

 

“Accessories?”

 

“I have my beaded bracelet and a purple clutch.  You?”

 

“I’m thinking my rhinestone handbag.”

 

“Good choice.  Pick a necklace that’s simple, elegant, and dips low to accent that neckline.”

 

Yuuri smiled and nodded.  Once they have their game plan in order, they parted to start getting ready.  Victor walked out of the bathroom wrapped in a towel shortly after Phichit left the room.  He leaned in and brushed a kiss against Yuuri’s temple.  Yuuri smiled back at him through the mirror.

 

“I am looking forward to spending this evening with you.”

 

“I am still reeling from the fact that you put all of this together for me,” Yuuri murmured in reply, turning to capture his lips in a brief kiss.

 

“Anything for you, my Yuuri.”

 

Yuuri gathered his clothes and slipped away to shower and dress as Victor disappeared into the closet.  When Yuuri reentered the bedroom, he found Victor had left him to his privacy.  He smiled as he added the finishing touches to his outfit and touched up his hair.  A little gloss, a touch of black liner and mascara, a ghost of silver eyeshadow, and he smiled into the mirror with approval.  The elegance he sought with his choices.  He slipped his feet into the silver heels and walked confidently into the next room. 

 

Victor turned on his entrance and released a long whistle of appreciation.  “My Yuuri, so beautiful,” he whispered stepping before his partner.

 

“What about you?” Yuuri returned, his eyes taking in Victor’s form appreciatively.  The older man was clothed in a beautiful black textured Armani  [ tux  ](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/37/c9/f5/37c9f56f625540ab07db6e52f9b022ca.jpg) with a narrow tie and a silk scarf tucked in to create pattern in place of a waistcoat.  The long lines caught Victor’s trim figure and elegant gate to it’s advantage.  “So very beautiful,” Yuuri echoed softly.

 

“You need one more thing,” Victor murmured as he pulled a long jewelry box from his pocket.  “Just a little frosting to finish off your outfit.”  He lifted off the lid to reveal a diamond  [ bracelet ](http://www.kay.com/en/kaystore/r6-bracelets-101490--1/diamond-bracelet-1-2-ct-tw-round-cut-sterling-silver-111632509/101490/101490.101508) .

 

Yuuri’s lips parted in surprise.  “Vitya,” he whispered.  Victor wrapped the bracelet around Yuuri’s wrist and connected the clasp before brushing his lips over the younger man’s fingers.  Yuuri sniffed.  “I hope my eyeliner doesn’t run,” he fussed, fanning himself with his free hand.

 

Victor smoothed a stray strand of hair behind Yuuri’s ear.  “You are beautiful.”

 

A clearing of a throat drew their attention to their guests.  Phichit stood in his sequined purple skirt and black cowl necked top, a purple mix of beads on his wrist, black heels on his feet.  Chris complimented him with a gray  [ suit  ](https://i.pinimg.com/736x/a6/34/6b/a6346bea59e2b4e027505d415dc50c11--mens--piece-suits-mens-suits.jpg) holding black accents including buttons on the collar, a black shirt and a darker gray waistcoat.  His tie held a black diagonal stripe interrupted by diamonds.  “What an elegant pair you two make,” Chris offered his hosts, smiling softly.

 

“You don’t bring us shame yourself,” Victor returned.  “Shall we?”  He led the way to the SUV and navigated to the theatre.  “The  [ Mariinsky  ](http://video.nationalgeographic.com/video/moments-from-russia/170619-mariinsky-ballet-theatre-st-petersburg-russia) is a historic ballet theatre,” he explained as they drove discussing some of the history and the various ballets, operas, and other performances at the theatre.

 

“I can’t believe you managed tickets on such a short notice,” Chris pointed out.

 

“The box is maintained by one of my sponsors,” Victor explained.  “I just made a call to see if it was in use.”

 

Victor led them to their seats, navigating the building with ease.  “I look forward to attending many shows with you, my Yuuri,” Victor murmured as he handed the younger man into his seat.  Yuuri responded with a demure smile and lowering his eyelids to fan his lashes against his cheeks.  “So beautiful,” he whispered.

 

In the privacy of the box, Phichit leaned into Chris as they held up the  [ program  ](https://www.mariinsky.ru/en/playbill/playbill/2015/9/30/2_1930) and read through the synopsis and discussing the story.  Chris commented that he had read the book and looked forward to comparing the novel to the ballet.  Phichit rolled his eyes and responded, “Of course you’ve read it.  I haven’t found a book that you haven’t read in the western world.”

 

Victor leaned into Yuuri and brushed a kiss at the juncture of his ear.  He could hear the interruption of breath and parted from Yuuri’s warmth with a satisfied smile.  

 

[ Anna Karenina ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rGmIx31avIM) story began to unfold.  Yuuri became lost in it, as Victor expected, and he found himself torn between watching Yuuri’s reactions and the ballet itself.  As he watched a tear grace the younger man’s cheek, he couldn’t help but brush it away tenderly.  Yuuri glanced towards him and smiled.  Leaning into the turn of Victor’s neck, he continued to watch the ballet from Victor’s embrace.

 

Nearby, Phichit wasn’t fairing much better.  Chris’ hand rubbed tender circles on his date’s back, absorbing the soft sighs and watching the emotions bubble to the surface.  Honestly, the other two men weren’t much better.  Soon fingers were dashing to other eyes as the ballet closed out.  

 

Victor guided Yuuri out with a hand on the small of his back.  Chris followed right behind as they sought their ride in the carpark.  Victor navigated out into traffic and directed them towards home.  

 

“Victor, you are an amazing host,” Phichit praised from the back seat.  “This visit has been full of wonderful surprises.”

 

“You know I love to surprise my audience,” Victor answered, winking back from the mirror.

 

  
  


* * *

  
  
  


NOTE:

 

For the complete Anna Karenina ballet, I have provided this  [ link ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Ev60t-dhS4) .

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the paintings are about to be gone...


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chris, Phichit, and a drawing...there's a bit of angst here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So my dears, competition is about to start up and that means the sleepers will awaken. 
> 
> Thanks so much to my wonderful team/friends BluSkates and Magrathea for the edits. I hope you are reading their stuff because they are some of my favorite stories.

* * *

 

Victor and Chris were up early drinking coffee and waiting for the auction house to arrive.  Victor walked over and picked up the painting of Yuuri, turning it upside down on the protective paper.  He planned to wrap the painting for travel, however as he lifted it something rustled and his eye caught a small detail.  Furrowing his brow, he reached into the edge of the painting and dislodged a piece of paper.  Turning it over, his eyes widened and he dropped the scrap like it was on fire, his hands closing over his gut in a visceral reaction.

 

“What?” Chris asked. Setting his coffee down on the counter, he crossed over to where Victor stood staring at the paper on the floor.  Chris bent down to pick it up, turning it over, his eyes widened.  Chris had seen pictures like this prior, but not one of a close friend, and not like this. “Okay, I knew I didn’t like Sasha, but he’s one sick bastard.”

 

The sketch depicted Yuuri, his arms restrained, his eyes blindfolded, his body only partially clothed and the rest...although there was no way for the artist to know, was a fair representation of Yuuri’s anatomy.  Disgusted, Chris dropped the drawing onto the table.  He glanced up at Victor and could see his friend struggling, felt himself mirroring the response.  Yuuri was his friend.  But if this picture were of his lover, his Phichit, tormented, pain clearly etched into his face, forced to submit in an act of sexual abuse...Chris fought his own need to spill his guts.

 

Victor still clutched his stomach, his eyes pinned to the drawing, shock and betrayal on his face.  It was like finding Yuuri that night in the hotel.  The look on Victor’s face when he found Yuuri that night, trying to mask his pain and help his Yuuri...that look covered Victor’s features unfiltered.  With his pen, Sasha managed to rape Yuuri once more.  Chris allowed Victor a moment to just breath, then he had the man’s eyes.  “Are you going to show it to him?”

 

Victor’s eyes widened.  “No fucking way!  That would trigger him.  It could set him back in therapy.”

 

“Are you going to...tell him about it?”  Chris asked with a wince, his eyes darting uncomfortably to the drawing.  How could Victor soften this?

 

Victor turned the paper over, just seeing the image upset him.  He looked at Chris, who seemed equally disturbed and Victor realized he wasn’t alone in his repulsion.  It disturbed both of them.  They both had been there _that_ night.  They both had found him.  They both had seen the aftermath of what happened to him.  Victor felt his body go hot and then very cold, his palms were clammy, there was a taste of iron in his mouth.  “I think I’m going to be sick,” Victor said, holding his hand over his mouth, running out of the room and into the hall bathroom.

 

After emptying the contents of his stomach, he sat back against the wall.  Victor would wait until his heart stopped racing in his ears before trying to move.  A tap on the door grabbed his attention.  “Come in, Chris,” he muttered.

 

Chris entered.  At the sink he dampened a rag and handed it to his friend before sitting on the edge of the tub.  Victor wiped down his face before pressing it against the back of his neck.  “Where’s the drawing?” he asked suddenly with a panicked voice.

 

Chris reached into his pocket and pulled it out holding it by the corners as if the contents had some form of contagion.  “I knew you wouldn’t want it lying around.”

 

“What am I going to do?”  Victor’s voice was raspy and hollow.

 

Chris lowered his eyes.  “I don’t know.”

 

Noise out in the living room grabbed their attention.  Both older men shuffled out of the bathroom to see Yuuri staring sleepily at the two of them.  Even in his fatigue Yuuri could sense something amiss, tilting his head to the side, he asked, “What are you doing?”

 

Yuuri studied Victor curiously as the older man shoved his hand back through his silver hair.  Phichit took that moment to make an appearance.  He looked from one to the other before resting his eyes on Yuuri.

 

“What’s going on?” Phichit crossed to stand next to Yuuri.

 

“That’s what I’m trying to figure out,” Yuuri said as he side-eyed the other two men.

 

Victor looked defeated as he sat down on the couch.  Chris dropped down next to him as if he were in trouble as well.  Yuuri crossed his arms and Phichit rested his hands on his waist.  With a sigh, Victor began.  “I was about to wrap the painting of you to put into storage.  When I flipped it over, I found a sketch tucked into the back.”

 

Yuuri’s eyes narrowed as he said slowly, “A sketch?  Let me see it.”

 

Victor shook his head slowly.  “I...no, Yuuri.”

 

“Wh-why?” Yuuri asked, his eyes widening.

 

Chris thinned his lips.  “Trust me, Yuuri, you don’t need to see this.”

 

Yuuri dropped into the chair across from them, pale and frowning.  “H-how bad is it?”

 

The two men exchanged glances.  They could see Yuuri straining to control his panic.  Victor lowered his eyes.  “It might...just trust me.  You don’t need to see it.”

 

Yuuri nodded slowly, accepting.  “Okay, Vitya.  I trust you.  Are there more?”

 

Victor’s mouth opened, exchanging glances with Chris.  “Ummm...we didn’t check.”

 

The four of them turned towards the crate and for a moment froze before they all jumped for the crate.  As Yuuri reached for a painting, Victor placed a hand over his.  “I don’t know if we’ll find something, _lyubov moya_ , but if we do, I’d rather you not see it.”  Yuuri pulled his hands back, and blinked before backing away and nodding.

 

They pulled the paintings out one by one and checked the backs finding nothing else.  Repacking them, the relief was mixed for the group.  They hadn’t found anything, but that was just it, they hadn’t _found_ anything.  Finally, they all settled on the couch and chairs, Victor pulling Yuuri to sit next to him.  “Yuuri, are you okay?”

 

Yuuri frowned.  “Maybe?”  He turned to look at the others then rested his eyes on Chris.  “Should I be scared?”

 

Chris opened his mouth then closed it, glancing at Phichit.  “It was upsetting,” he settled on.

 

Yuuri nodded.  “Maybe...if Phichit saw it, he could decide.”

 

Chris’ opened his mouth then glanced at Victor.  The older man paused, considering this for a moment, then nodded.  He knew that if anyone loved Yuuri as much as he did, it was Phichit.  Chris motioned Phichit to follow him down the hall.

 

* * *

  


In the privacy of their room, Chris closed the door handed Phichit the drawing.  Phichit slowly unfolded it then his eyes widened as he dropped it with a hiss.  “Shit, no!  Do _not_ show that to Yuuri!”

 

“We won’t.  But...I don’t know what we do with it.”

 

There was a tap on the door and then Victor was in the room.  “Yuuri is cooking breakfast.  Something to keep busy and help him stay calm.  He wanted me to come in here for us to decide what must be done.  He said he’ll trust our decision.”

 

Phichit bent down and picked it up.  Handing the sketch to Victor, who appeared reluctant to accept it, he suggested, “Take it to your attorney.  Maybe it’s enough for a restraining order.  It’s documentation regardless.”

 

“The youngest is always making the most sense,” Chris stated wryly.  “I agree.  That’s your best option.”  Chris studied Victor for a moment.  “What are you feeling right now?”

 

Victor frowned unhappily.  “Inwardly, I blame myself for bringing Sasha into Yuuri’s life, and for letting him stay for as long as he did.  Outwardly, I want to punch him.”

 

“Me, too,” echoed both Chris and Phichit.

 

“Who makes drawings like that...especially of someone who’s been raped?” Phichit muttered, anger and annoyance in his voice.  Then he narrowed his eyes.  “If Mari gets wind of this…”

 

“She’ll be in Russia and we’ll have to figure out a way to get her out of jail,” Victor finished.  “Let’s not bring the family in on it.”

 

“So, the attorney,” Chris stated.

 

Victor nodded.  “The attorney.”

 

They emerged and could hear Yuuri humming in the kitchen.  The domesticity of the scene gave Victor hope that Yuuri would be able to move on.  Victor slipped in behind him.  “I’m going to take it to the attorney and let him handle it.”

 

“I think...that is best.  I’d hate to have to explain to the ISU why you were arrested,” Yuuri responded quietly, leaning into the man behind him.

 

Victor’s eyes widened in surprise at Yuuri’s easy acquiescence and at his suggestion of arrest.

 

Yuuri shrugged and went on to explain.  “I don’t know what that sketch is of, but I know it has you seeing red.  Don’t get in trouble.  Please.  I trust you to defend me if I need you, but do not seek out the chance.”

 

“Yes, Yuuri, of course,” Victor agreed with a sigh.

 

Chris narrowed his eyes thoughtfully.  “Have you talked to Yakov about this?”

 

Victor nodded.  “Since I kicked Sasha out of the apartment, I have kept Yakov informed.  He’s banned from the rink.  Just in case.”

 

Yuuri shivered then forced a smile.  “Let’s move forward.  I have eggs and rice.  Coffee and tea on the bar.”

 

While they ate, a call came through.  “It’s the auction house,” Victor informed them.  “Let me take care of this.”  He excused himself and went into the other room to greet them.

 

Phichit studied his friend.  “You’re avoiding your feelings.”

 

“I know,” he stated, not even attempting to argue.

 

“Yuuri…”

 

His lips tightened.  “I’ll talk about it with Dr. Abramovitch.  Just...let me do this.  My way.  I need a little normal.  I don’t want to give into it right now.  It’s not like Victor doesn’t realize what I’m doing.”

 

Phichit sighed, “If you need to talk…”

 

“I know,” Yuuri responded, cutting him off.  “Chris,” he turned.  “Tell me about your program.”

 

“You know me, Yuuri,” he stated his voice lacking enthusiasm as he glanced over at Phichit uncertainly.  “Sex on ice.  I can’t wait to show you.”

 

“I look forward to it,” Yuuri responded.  “We can compare it to my _Eros_.”

 

Chris grinned, although it was weakened by the morning’s shadows.  “ _Oui_!”

 

* * *

  


After their late breakfast, the group left to skate.  Victor and Chris called corrections out to the younger skaters before trading places.  Phichit started out doing his best Chris impression as he called out to his boyfriend, prompting Yuuri to do the same with Victor.  This prompted the older men to do the same for their boyfriends when they traded back.  Although they spent the afternoon laughing at each other’s antics, the boys left the ice sore and achy.

 

All four grabbed a late lunch at a piroshki stand and took their food to a bench at the park.  Yuuri’s exhaustion, exacerbated by lack of good sleep the night before and the morning’s stress, had him leaning heavily against Victor.  The older man smiled indulgently.  “Would you two gentlemen mind if I get this one to take a nap?  We can do something this evening.”

 

Chris and Phichit exchanged glances, nodding.  “You go on ahead of us,” suggested Chris.  “We’ll go for a walk in the park before heading back to the apartment.  And if you’re still sleeping, we’ll snuggle in and watch some TV.”

 

“Thank you,” Victor responded gratefully.  Of course, the whole scheme had been cooked up to give Chris a chance to talk with Phichit.  As Victor and Yuuri walked towards their home, Victor asked Yuuri, “Do you think he’ll take advantage of it and talk to Chris?”

 

“Do you think Chris will step up and talk if he doesn’t?” Yuuri returned.

 

They frowned but they at least this gave them the opportunity.

 

* * *

  


Chris and Phichit wandered down the trail.  The park had a number of private sections and Chris led Phichit along, remembering the paths from when he dated Victor...at least somewhat.  “Here’s a quiet spot,” he murmured, guiding Phichit into seclusion with his hand on the small of the younger man’s back.

 

Phichit lowered down to the ground and butterflied his legs.  Chris dropped down to face him, taking his hands in his own.  Phichit stared at their joined hands for a moment, a myriad of emotions playing on his tan face.  Finally, looking up, he could see the serious expression on Chris’ face.  “You said...we needed to talk.”

 

“I think you know what this is about.”

 

“The thing is...I don’t know if there is a ‘this’ to talk about.  I could show you every text message.  They are benign.  You would be more suspicious if you read my texts conversations with Yuuri.”

 

“Phichit, honey...this isn’t about Seung-gil.  This is about you.  What do you feel?”

 

The younger man swallowed.  “I...I am not ready for this,” he whispered.  “I like you...a lot.  But...I’m not ready.”

 

“What do you want?”

 

The Thai man, who usually bubbled over with joy, felt his lip quiver.  “Is it possible to go back to where we were?  Friends?  Affectionate friends?”

 

Chris thinned his lips into a sad smile.  “I will never withdraw my friendship, Phichit.  I just didn’t expect to feel the way I do.  I said from the beginning I wouldn’t push you into a relationship you aren’t ready for.”

 

Phichit listened to the words, but he could feel the unspoken finality in them.  He licked his lips, “But?”

 

Chris looked down at his hands, “It hurts me to think of you with someone else.  But...your happiness is more important to me.”

 

“So it’s all or nothing?  That’s not how this started.”  Phichit felt cheated, he wanted to be angry, but he couldn’t.

 

“I know...and it’s wrong of me to change the rules but here I am...just a boy in love with a boy.”

 

Phichit’s lips parted in surprise.  “Chris…”

 

Chris ran his fingers through his blond curls.  “I want you, Phichit.  But I want you to want me back.  So tell me.  Where are we?”

 

Phichit studied his hands.  “Is it wrong to want to think about it?  Maybe if I was older it would be easier...but I’m still figuring myself out.  All of that ‘free spirit’ stuff was just me trying to figure out Phichit.  And...I do want a certain someone.  I just…”

 

“Is it the commitment that has you worried?”

 

“I’ve never been in a long term relationship, Chris,” Phichit replied with an uncertain shrug.

 

Chris nodded, accepting.  “I have one more question.  I haven’t asked it...because I’m afraid of it.  And you don’t have to answer this.  But if you are going to think about it, I want you to truly think about it.  What is Seung-gil to you?”

 

“I-I don’t know.”

 

Chris thinned his lips and sighed.  “Peaches, you know how I feel about you.  I just hope I’m still around when you figure it out.  This door won’t remain open forever.  I want more.”

 

Phichit’s shoulders drooped unhappily, squeezing the other man’s hand.  “I know.  I understand.  I promise...I won’t cheat on you.  I won’t...sleep with anyone.  Not while we are still together like this.”

 

“But you won’t give me a full commitment either,” Chris surmised.  “I guess this is what people mean when they say ‘it’s complicated’.”

 

Phichit blinked the tears.  “I don’t want to hurt you.”

 

“I agreed to that risk when I let my heart loose.  So be it.  We’ll see where this goes and I’ll hope you come around.”

 

* * *

  


Dinner was strained that night.  Between Chris and Phichit’s talk and the continued evidence of Sasha’s presence, all four were on edge.  Even when they saw their friends off the next morning, hearts were heavy.  Yuuri leaned in to Victor.  “I don’t like seeing them so unhappy.”

 

“I don’t think anything was resolved by their talk.”

 

“Pandora’s Box?”

 

“Possibly.”

 

“Well, fuck.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Need reading material! What are your favorites? I just received notice that shysweetthing just released a new story and cuddled up to read it. But most of my regular reads have fizzled or finished. 
> 
> So far I'm keeping up with the schedule I set. I am back to work, though...as are my lovely friends. I would rather put a chapter off than not have it read if possible. 
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Skate America: You've been Phichited!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I really liked this chapter and I hope you feel the same.
> 
> Thanks to BluSkates and Magrathea for making time for me. I know your lives are getting busy and I really appreciate you both.

* * *

 

Victor went over the last minute details with Ivan as he prepared to leave.  Ivan looked through the list and nodded.  “Do you mind if I have a guest?” he asked.

 

Victor snorted.  “As long as it isn’t Sasha, I don’t care who you entertain.”

 

Ivan blushed.  “It’s just that...it’s hard for us to be alone.”

 

Victor studied him.  “Damn.  Why didn’t I see it?”

 

“You have your own worries.  I know...Dmitry...he’s been there all along.”

 

“I thought...you had a girlfriend.”

 

“I did but...we broke up.  Because I already belonged to him.  It wasn’t too long after you moved back.  Dmitry and I...we just realized we’d been lying to ourselves.”

 

“Have you thought about moving out of the dorms where you’ll have more privacy?”

 

“We’ve thought about it...but we don’t have the financial support you garner.”

 

Victor frowned.  “I wish I could help more.  But you don’t have to hide it here.”

 

Ivan nodded, smiling gratefully.  “I knew we’d be okay...we just weren’t ready to be open about it.  And, you know how it is at the dorms.”

 

“Lowkey bullying...and sometimes it’s not so lowkey.”

 

Ivan sighed.  “Sometimes I wished we still lived with Yakov.”

 

“I’m surprised Yura isn’t still living there.”

 

“Lilia and Yakov have made several threats to force him to return.  He’s really too young, even for the dorms.”

 

“Yuuri and I want him to live with us.  We’ve talked about it several times.”

 

“But what about Japan?”

 

“He’d be welcome to join us there as well, but I’d hate to take him so far from his Grandfather for so long.  Yuuri did suggest we focus on staying there only during the off season, at least until I retire.”

 

“And that puts Yura at his Grandfather’s.  Yuuri did all that so that you could be here for the boy.”

 

Victor smiled, nodding.  “Yuuri has a soft spot for Yura.”

 

“And Mila.  He’s very patient with them both.  I’ve watched him in the studio.”

 

“That’s another reason.  Working with Lilia gives him another perspective on teaching ballet.”

 

“Is that his retirement plan?”

 

“We bought an inn.  We want to use it to board skaters.  We are working out a plan, but it’s a process.  I’ve been talking to Yakov.  He said the difference is that the state pays for our facilities and his salary.  We have to figure out a way to expand our facilities and make sure everyone gets paid.”

 

“You’re really thinking ahead.”

 

Victor shrugged.  “It’s not that far away.  I might have two or three more years and Yuuri four more years after me.  I want us to walk into our new life seamlessly.  And maybe...start a family.”

 

Ivan’s eyes widened.  “Are you going to adopt?”

 

“We haven’t discussed the details but you see how Yuuri is with younger skaters.”

 

“He had them all skating figures yesterday.  In a line.  Yakov walked in and just about fainted, he could never get them to do that.  They adore him.”

 

“That’s because he’s adorable,” Victor winked.

 

“You might keep us in mind if you need assistants after you get set up.  It would be nice to work among friends.”

 

“It would indeed,” Victor agreed, he reached out and place a hand on Ivan’s shoulder.

 

* * *

  
  


**Skate America, Milwaukee, Wisconsin**

 

They arrived at their hotel in Milwaukee, and Yuuri immediately went to the shower before he dropped into bed.  Victor hung their clothes and settled them into the room.  “Yuuri,” Victor whined as he draped himself across the younger skater’s body.

 

Yuuri shoved Victor away even though the older man pouted.  “Fifteen hours, Vitya.  We were traveling for fifteen hours.  Call.  Check on Makka.  Order room service.  Hang out with Phichit.  I don’t care.  I’m sleeping.”  With a huff, he then patted the bed inviting Cocoa by his side, curling around her in a snuggle.

 

Victor continued to pout as he disappeared into the bathroom.  Jetlag Yuuri’s tantrums were  legendary and Victor wasn’t surprised.  But having slept on the plane, he was restless.  Exiting the shower, he pulled on a clean set of sweats.  His phone chimed almost as soon as someone knocked on the door.  “Phichit!”

 

“Hey, Victor.  Where’s...oh, didn’t sleep in flight,” the younger skater surmised looking at the raven hair buried in the blankets.

 

“Does he ever?”

 

“Sometimes Ciao Ciao would induce him to take some sleep meds.  You should talk to him about that.  It makes traveling with Yuuri more bearable.  Well, he’s out for hours.  Why don’t you come hang out with me?  We’ll bring take out back for Yuuri.”

 

And this is how Victor found himself swept into Phichit’s world.  Five hours later, he received a text from Yuuri.

 

**Yuuri/ Where are you?**

 

**Victor/ I don’t know?**

 

**Yuuri/ What do you mean you don’t know?**

 

**Victor/ Phichit kidnapped me.**

 

**Yuuri/ Oh, dear.**

 

**Yuuri/ Logging into IG**

 

**Yuuri/ You went to the** [ **Harley Davidson Museum** ](https://www.tripadvisor.com/Attraction_Review-g60097-d1095429-Reviews-Harley_Davidson_Museum-Milwaukee_Wisconsin.html) **?**

 

**Victor/ I think so.**

 

**Yuuri/ You took a picture with the** [ **Bronze Fonz** ](https://www.tripadvisor.com/Attraction_Review-g60097-d2708384-Reviews-Bronze_Fonz-Milwaukee_Wisconsin.html) **.**

 

**Victor/ I did...I don’t know what that is…**

 

**Yuuri/ It’s from the era of your aprons.**

 

**Yuuri/ Vitya?  Are you locked in an** [ **escape room** ](https://www.tripadvisor.com/Attractions-g60097-Activities-c56-t208-Milwaukee_Wisconsin.html) **?**

 

**Victor/  Yes!  That’s it.**

 

**Yuuri/  Is Phichit with you still?**

 

**Victor/ Yes…**

  
  
  


**Yuuri/ You better get my boyfriend back to the room safe!**

 

**Phichit/ Don’t worry.  I’ve just about got this figured out.**

 

**Yuuri/ Peach!  Last time we did an escape room, you had us trapped in there for hours.**

 

**Phichit/ Chill!**

  
  
  


**Victor/ Yuuri?**

 

**Yuuri/ It’s going to be okay.  You just have to solve the puzzle.**

 

**Victor/ Phichit says he has this.**

 

**Yuuri/ Phichit never has it.  But you can do this.**

  
  


Four hours later, Victor arrived frazzled and arguing with Phichit.  “I told you I had this.”

 

“Yet we were still there an hour later.”

 

“You are as bad as Yuuri.  Always doubting me.”

 

“You had me locked in a room for four hours, Phichit.  Before we had dinner.”

 

“So? You’re just hangry.”

 

Victor turned and huffed.  “I don’t even know what the hell that means.”

 

“It’s when you're ang...oh, never mind.”

 

Yuuri was leaning against the facing of the open door, his arms crossed, tapping his foot.   Victor turned towards him and rushed into his arm.  “You told me to hang out with Phichit.”

 

“You shouldn’t listen to bad advice from jetlagged Yuuri,” his boyfriend responded.  “Phichit!”

 

“It was a great adventure!  Didn’t you see the pictures?”

 

“That’s how I figured out you were in trouble.”

 

“But you helped us out.”

 

“Because you were texting me the clues and I wanted to see my boyfriend again.”  Turning to Victor, he asked, “Are you hungry?”

 

“I was planning to bring something back to you,” Victor whined, frustration clearly in his voice.

 

“Come here, Vitya.  We’ve all been Phichited at one time or another.  It’s a miracle you’ve been spared this long.  Now come.  Eat.”

 

“Is there enough for me?” Phichit asked, leaning his head into the room.  Seeing the candles and wine, he amended, “I guess not.  Later!”

 

“Hang out with Leo,” Yuuri suggested.

 

“You ordered wine,” Victor smiled.

 

“Well, I knew your day was stressful.  I didn’t think to warn you about escape rooms.”

 

“Phichit convinced me he was good at them,” Victor pouted.

 

Yuuri snorted.  “He convinces everyone he’s good at them.  Last year, he had Leo and Guang Hong locked up and we had to send a rescue party for the three of them.”

 

“I think the lesson learned here is to not go out with Phichit without direct Yuuri supervision,” the Russian decided, his fingers squeezing Yuuri’s warmly.

 

Later, Victor found himself between Yuuri’s legs watching the man come undone beneath him.  “Perhaps I should become lost with  _ you  _ in an escape room,” Victor suggested.

 

“I don’t mind getting lost with you...but I’d prefer to be someplace we won’t be found,” Yuuri answered reaching up to pull him down into a kiss.

 

* * *

  
  


Victor waited for his slot to perform his short program.  So many years he stood in this place and felt a certain emptiness.  This year, however, he had Yuuri and everything now had meaning.  As he skated out onto the ice, waiting for the opening notes of  [ Sparrow ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C9haTFoGcvk) .  The sad notes wrapped around Victor then urged him forward, embracing his pain and using it to climb out of sorrow, revealing strength in vulnerability, movements delicate in appearance and Yuuri knew the fine balance of strength required to develop those movements.  He knew it was their story but it was also Victor’s story, overlaying theirs, his struggle with depression, his fight for purpose...a purpose he found in Yuuri.  They became one another’s heartbeat, Victor’s closing movement focusing on Yuuri with his hand over his heart.

 

Victor could hear the crowd around him cheering for the performance.  However, only one person’s opinion counted and he held onto those brown eyes as he skated towards the break in the barrier, taking the guards and stepping into the kiss and cry.  “How did I do?”

 

“You were beautiful, of course,” Yuuri responded even as he allowed Victor to pull him into an embrace.  Victor held onto him as he rested his cheek against Yuuri’s hair waiting for his scores.

 

**102.73**

 

“It’s a solid start,” Victor decided with a sharp nod.  “Let’s find a place to watch Phichit skate.”

 

They found a seat, Cocoa curling around at his feet, as the first words to  [ Shall we skate? ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ew-U3Qp0un4) filled the arena.  They watched their friend, a soft smile on their lips.  “He’s wanted to skate to this for a long time,” Yuuri murmured.

 

“Is he going to make us watch it again?”

 

“I’m surprised he didn’t bring it to Russia,” Yuuri chuckled.

 

“He truly just goes out there and enjoys himself,” Victor commented warmly.

 

Phichit finished up in the mid-nineties.  As they returned to their room, Yuuri invited Phichit to watch movies.  True to form, Phichit offered his DVD of  _ The King and the Skater _ .

 

“Let’s save it as a celebration if all four of us make it into the final,” Yuuri suggested.  Phichit pouted a moment then agreed.  They settled in to watch  _ Avengers:  Age of Ultron _ .

 

“I can’t believe Ciao-Ciao remembered to pick that up for me,” Yuuri commented excitedly.  When the coach passed it to him in the locker room, his eyes lit up and he surprised the coach with a hug.

 

“You’ve only been talking about getting it since we watched it at the cinema,” Phichit pointed out.  Movie night was a regular event at the Detroit Skate Club and they went once or twice a month, each skater placing their pick into the pot and their coach drawing the title out.  Everyone had to go with the pick.

 

As they watched the movie, Phichit narrowed his eyes at his phone.  Yuuri was engrossed in the movie and failed to notice as the younger skater passed his phone to Victor to show him the posts both he and Victor had been tagged in.  Victor frowned taking out his own phone, confirming the same receipts.  Yuuri finally picked up on something going on behind him and turned around in bed to face the two men he lay between.

 

“What’s up?”

 

“I don’t know...it could be nothing,” Phichit began, starting to tuck away his phone but Yuuri held his hand out insistently.  With a side glance at Victor, he relinquished the device.

 

Yuuri frowned as he studied the images.  “Phichit, I think these are each part of a greater image.  Can we pull them out and rearrange them on your laptop?”

 

Phichit did as Yuuri directed and soon they were moving the images around on the screen.  It was incomplete but as the master image came together, Yuuri felt a chill.  “That’s our apartment.”

 

“It had to have been taken while we were all in Russia, but it’s not one of my pictures,” Phichit stated.

 

“Nor mine,” Victor stated, frowning.

 

“That angle is weird,” Phichit analyzed the photo, “and see that lighting?  I think that’s through the window.  Like maybe a high powered zoom.”

 

“But who?” Yuuri asked.

 

Phichit thinned his lips.  “The account has no information.  They probably made it up to send the pictures.  But why?”

 

“To freak us out...and it’s working.”  Yuuri pressed into Victor’s chest.  “Did these all come today?”

 

“Yeah.  The time stamp suggests it was while we skated.”

 

“Sasha?”

 

“Maybe...he has both of our contacts.  I blocked him but he could have made up an account to do this.”

 

“We shouldn’t overlook the possibility that it is...them.”

 

“I should contact Nikolai just in case,” Victor stated.  “Can you send me a screen capture of the assembled picture?”  Victor was soon gathering the pictures and preparing a message for the detective.

 

“I don’t like this,” Yuuri murmured tremulously.  “Phichit, you’re staying the night.”

 

The Thai looked from one to the other.  “Are you sure?”

 

“Without Chris here, I’m certain,” Victor confirmed.  “We’ll walk you over to get your clothes.  No more alone time.”

 

During their free skates, both men were still shaken from the new information.  Phichit’s performance held at fourth place.  Victor took the gold, but not by the wide margin he was used to.  Leo landed in second and Otabek third.

 

* * *

 

 

Victor was both anxious to return home and afraid at the same time.  Yuuri wasn’t talking about it, changing the topic every time it was brought up.  A fifteen hour flight later, they walked in, greeted by Ivan and Dmitry curled up on the sofa, too tired to take in the pink faces and quick movements like teenagers caught making out.

 

“We’ll get out of your hair,” Dmitry stated.

 

“Don’t worry about it.  It’s late.  Stay the night.”  Victor’s feet carried him exhausted towards the bedroom.  Yuuri didn’t follow.  Coming back out, he saw his love frozen, staring out the open window.  Cocoa whined softly, licking Yuuri’s hand as he remained transfixed.

 

“How did they look past the reflective surface?”

 

Victor frowned.  “Ask Phichit.”

 

Yuuri pulled out his phone and texted in a hurry.  The reply came back in moments.

 

**Phichit/ Polarized lenses.**

 

Yuuri looked back out the window.  “Can we get window coverings?”

 

“I’ll order them tomorrow.”

 

Ivan and Dmitry left out early the next morning with Victor offering to let them stay if dorm life got to be too much.  Ivan laughed and said he’d hate to steal Yura’s room.  He spent the day arranging the installation of new window coverings.  Yuuri slept off and on, moving from bed to couch then back to the bed.  By nightfall, though, Victor had long linen panels hanging from the glass windows filtering the light and providing the added privacy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, now...who took that picture?


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes we take matters in our own hands.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So thankful I have my friends to look over my work. Thank you, BluSkates and Magrathea. 
> 
> As for the rest of you, this chapter is a bit nuts. Hope you like it.

* * *

 

 

Victor always considered himself a mild-mannered man.  He walked home that evening from the rink, however, with his thoughts on his Yuuri, who had stayed late at the rink to help Mila with her choreography before driving them home.  He was taken off guard by the sight of Sasha on his side of town.  His eyes narrowed and several thoughts entered his head at once.   _ Why are you in this part of town?  You left those things in my home.  You drew things that hurt my Yuuri, that scared my Yuuri.  You are the reason my Yuuri’s nightmares have gotten worse. _

 

And it was these thoughts that aggravated matters between the two.  Sasha stopped short, feigning surprise.  “Vitya, what a surprise to see you here!”

 

“You don’t get to call me that.  Not after all that you’ve done!”

 

“I don’t...whatever do you mean?”  He blinked his eyes, his smile mocking Victor.

 

“Don’t pretend you don’t know.  You made unauthorized drawings of my Yuuri.  You keep coming around when we’ve asked you to leave.  Leave us the fuck alone!  Stop stalking my Yuuri!  He’s been through enough!”  His voice rose with each accusation and had drawn the attention of several onlookers.

 

Sasha looked hurt.  Victor knew better.  Sasha’s eyes narrowed, knowing where to direct his venom.  “I would never hurt Yuuri.  He’s too beautiful for words.  I would have him as my muse.”

 

A growl slipped from Victor’s lips, low and guttural.  “He has no interest in that position.  Back off, Sasha!”

 

“Now Vitya, are you certain?” the artist mocked.  “Are you sure that he’s so faithful to you in your absence?  Are you certain he didn’t pose for me of his own accord?”

 

Victor’s eyes narrowed and his fist swung before he thought through the consequences.  He swung before his mind caught up with him.  He swung with the strength of his pain, his need to protect Yuuri overriding any synapses of forethought.

 

And phones started snapping pictures.

 

And video started spreading.

 

And within an hour, his PR team was working hard to recover the situation.  On it before Victor could even contact them.

 

By the time  he’d realized what he had done, he called Yakov.  “I fucked up.”

 

“You think?”  The long-suffering sigh came across the phone.  “Come back to the rink.  Let’s see if we can work this out.”

 

Yakov was already on the phone with ISU officials smoothing things over by the time Victor arrived.  After he hung up, the old coach announced, “I’ve talked with your attorneys and your marketing team.  They are working out a positive spin.  Is he pressing charges?”

 

“I-I don’t know.”

 

Yakov huffed, shaking his head and pushing his fingers through his hair in frustration.  “I expect this shit from Yura, not from you.  What’s going on?  What pushed you over the edge?  I need to know everything so we can make a good plan.  As the PR people said, we have get out in front of this.”

 

Victor began to tumble out every drawing, every note, every sneer...and intermingled with that, his guilt at inviting such a snake into his home, his pain that he hadn’t properly protected Yuuri, his feeling of impotence in this situation.  He also told of talking to his attorney and the psychiatrist about this matter.  The psychiatrist’s warning.  The real fears that Victor felt and that he feels and Yuuri’s obstinance.

 

* * *

  
  


Yakov drove Victor home and when he opened the door to their apartment, he met Yuuri with his hands on his hips.  “What were you thinking?”

 

“I...wasn’t,” Victor admitted.  “I’ve been holding onto that anger...and he was there.  He made insinuations.  I just...I swung before I realized it.”

 

“Vitya...this isn’t you,” Yuuri said, his voice chastising softly.  Sighing, he waved him into the kitchen.

 

Victor didn’t know why until Yuuri took his hand and started cleaning it.   _ Oh.  I didn’t know it was busted open.  _  Looking up at Yuuri, he said quietly, “I’m sorry.  I didn’t plan to retaliate like that.”

 

“What was he even doing in this part of town?” Yuuri asked quietly.

 

“He never answered.  But...I’m worried he was watching out for you.”  Victor studied the counter frowning.  “I don’t think this is over.  I hope...I didn’t make it worse.”

 

“That’s why you left the SUV for me.  So I’m not walking home alone.”

 

“Do you think I overreacted?”

 

Yuuri lifted his eyes from where he tended the wound.  “If the roles were reversed and I thought you were threatened, I know I would have done the same,” he answered honestly.  Then he smiled softly.  “So...yes, you overreacted.  No, I’m not really upset.  We’ll just have to deal with the aftermath.”

 

Victor sighed in resignation.  “Yakov’s already on it.  What’s the social media fallout?”

 

Yuuri pursed his lips.  “You’re trending...I’m not sure you want that, but there it is.  There are several videos as well as photos.  Chris has come out and stated that Sasha has been pushing this situation.  Phichit echoed his words.”

 

“I’ll need to release a statement.  I don’t know what to say.”  Victor doesn’t usually act rashly.  Even in impulse, he typically has a plan laid out with three possible contingencies.  He looked up at Yuuri feeling the uncertainty knot up in his gut.

 

“Don’t you have your publicist on this?” Yuuri pointed out.  “That’s their job.  Let them figure it out and go with it.”

 

Victor hugged Yuuri close, his hand wrapped up tight with the bandage.  “I love you.  You know that.”

 

“I think the evidence of that is on your hand and flying over the internet,” Yuuri responded wryly.  Then he leaned into Victor and murmured softly, his voice caressing Victor’s nerves.  “I love you, too, Vitya.  Don’t doubt that.”

 

“I was afraid you’d be mad,” the older man confessed.

 

Yuuri shook his head up against Victor’s neck.  “No, not mad.  Just going through all of the possible repercussions.”

 

“We can weather them.  Can we please change those locks?”  His whine held such resignation.

 

“Yes…”  Yuuri nodded against Victor’s chest as the other man held him tight afraid to let him go.

 

“I’ll call the building manager tomorrow to make the arrangements.”

 

* * *

  
  


Victor cuddled up with Yuuri that night and found the Japanese man soothing him and reassuring him that everything would be okay. They slept soundly and Victor didn’t notice as Yuuri slipped from his side the next morning.  Music filtered through the door eventually, however, and Victor started waking up.  He opened the door and was greeted with Yuuri cleaning house with music playing to a latin beat, dancing.  It was his mode of dress that had Victor stalled however.  Yuuri’s baby blue t-shirt fell off the shoulder and was tied at the waist.  Beneath that set a pair of black  [ panties ](http://www.garletta.pl/prod_img/images_oryginal/298522001.jpg) .  Victor did a double-take, though, because  _ oh my god those panties had ruffles on them _ .  Those ruffles accentuated the sway of Yuuri’s hips and Victor was mesmerized.

 

Victor knew Yuuri was aware of his presence.  He had to be with the way he stretched to lean over the counter as he wiped it down, putting that ass on display like a burlesque dancer adding a not-so-subtle bounce to those hips as the music continued its drumbeat.  Victor couldn’t stay away much longer, stepping up behind him, tracing his fingers down his side until it came to rest on that bare patch of skin as he fell into step with the sway of Yuuri’s hips.  Yuuri pressed back into him and released a soft moan as Victor’s lips tasted the skin on his shoulder.  “This is how you clean house?”

 

“When it’s just the two of us,” Yuuri responded as he allowed Victor to take control of the dance, leading him into the open space.

 

Victor’s hand pressed against Yuuri’s flat stomach pulling him tighter to his body even as he pressed his hardened member into the ruffled crease of Yuuri’s ass.  “I’m afraid I’m going to have to interrupt your endeavors.”

 

“How do you know this wasn’t my endeavor?” Yuuri pointed, leaning into Victor who ghosted behind him in a close tango.  Yuuri twirled out on the balls of his feet and then back in facing the man who barely touched the skin as he ran his fingers down the sensitive underside of Yuuri’s arm then sighed as he held Yuuri’s eyes.

 

His voice smoldered as he responded, “Then mission accomplished.”  Victor’s hand reached for Yuuri and found him semi-hard through the silken fabric.  “I never imagined household chores so attractively before.”

 

“With you, I find anything more attractive.”  He leaned forward as Victor’s lips teased the side of his mouth before allowing his tongue to trail up Victor’s jawline.  Victor turned into Yuuri’s movement granting him greater access and rewarding his attention with another stroke of his member through the panties.  A soft mewl escaped Yuuri’s lips as he reached Victor’s ear.

 

“Yuuuuuriiii,” Victor whined softly, his vowels exaggerating his need, his hands guiding Yuuri to turn.  “I want to…” his eyes cast about wildly then widened when they spotted the lube on the counter.  “Damn, this  _ was  _ your objective,” he chuckled, the laugh vibrating through the smaller man.

 

“I’m cleaning house in panties and  a t-shirt.  Could there be any other?” Yuuri pointed out.

 

Victor maneuvered them close to the counter where he reached for the lube.  “Your thighs, Yuuri,” he communicated, not wanting to give up the look of Yuuri in those underpants.  Yuuri, guided by Victor, now leaned forward onto the table, Victor’s lube-slicked hand on his inner thighs.  “Keep them tight for me, love.”  He pressed between those tight muscular legs with a moan.  “My god, I love your body.  Your ass.  Your thighs.  So beautiful.”  Each short phrase came out with each thrust.  One hand held tight to Yuuri’s hip.  The other roamed, squeezing Yuuri’s ass through the panties, reaching around to the front and teasing Yuuri’s length.  “I could spend a lifetime fucking your thighs.”

 

Yuuri released a breathless chuckle, reaching down to pull his shaft free of the panties.

 

“Don’t you dare pull those panties off,” Victor groaned, his breath becoming heavy.

 

Long fingers joined Yuuri’s along his length, pulling and twisting as Yuuri liked.  Yuuri slid his hand over the back of Victor’s, a small echo to the older man’s sure movements.

 

“God, I’m close, Yuuri.  How are your thighs so tight?”

 

“An advantage to pole dancing?” Yuuri suggested, a smirk in his reply.

 

“Yuu-Yuuri!” Victor cried, releasing across the surface of the table.  He could hear Yuuri’s breathing becoming more erratic, then his name “Vitya Vitya Vitya” before he felt the warm liquid slide over his fingers.  Yuuri’s legs folded on him and Victor lowered him to the floor gently.  “Let me take care of you,” Victor promised.

 

As Yuuri’s breathing returned to normal, he called out after Victor, “I hope that includes the table.  I just washed that!”

 

Victor’s chuckle echoed back.  He returned and wiped down his lover.  He slowly helped Yuuri back to his feet and over to the sofa.  “So...skating?”

 

Yuuri laughed softly under his breath.  “Let me shower first.  We were given afternoon ice today so I wasn’t in a hurry.”

 

“No studio?”

 

“Madame Lilia wanted to do some work with Yura.”

 

Victor nodded, helping Yuuri into the bedroom.

 

* * *

  
  


That evening, the boys stumbled into the apartment.  Victor pushed Yuuri hard and Yakov pushed Victor equally hard.  Yuuri could only offer an achy groan as he moved slowly into the bedroom.  Victor passed him and went straight to the bathroom starting a bath.  Soon Yuuri joined him.  Cradling Yuuri between his legs, they bathed in contented murmurs.  Yuuri turning in his arms to rest his head on Victor’s chest.

 

Leaving the warmth of the tub, Yuuri pulled out his soft pajamas and dressed, curling up into the fuzzy warmth of their bed.  “Vitya, what was Yakov talking to you about before we left?”  He clicked his tongue and patted the bed, calling Cocoa into his arms.  The chocolate colored poodle quickly complied, allowing Yuuri to snuggle into her.

 

“Just updating me on the aftermath of my idiocy,” Victor responded sardonically.  “It doesn’t look like it’s going to be too bad.  I have plenty of documentation to show that Sasha has been causing trouble.”

 

“Good,” Yuuri yawned, snuggling in closer to Cocoa.

 

Victor left Yuuri stretched out in bed and quickly falling asleep when his attention was drawn to his phone alert.  Opening, he read the headline.

 

**International Figure Skater Sexually Assaulted During Skate Canada International**

  
Victor dropped the phone as he paled.  Sitting down at the end of the bed he cradled his head in his hand considering how Yuuri would respond.   _ It’s starting once again. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts?


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yakov forces the children back into the mansion and dangles an offer before the other skaters. Who is going to take him up on it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long week but don't worry. I've got chapters written! Hope you enjoy this installment of As the World Tu...oh, wait...this isn't a soap opera. Or is it?
> 
> ;)
> 
> So many thanks to BluSkates and Magrathea for cleaning this up for me and for helping me make plot decisions.

* * *

 

  
  


Yakov stood in the small conference room at the rink waiting on his skaters to assemble.  A frantic call by Victor combined with several other coaches sending words back and forth regarding the headlines and how to keep their skaters safe prompted this meeting.  The children won’t be happy.  Yakov didn’t care if they were happy, only that they were safe.  Lilia was of the same mind.

 

Georgi, Dmitry, and Ivan arrived together and slumped across the table, the latter two listening as Georgi lamented over his latest loss.  Anya dropped into a chair next to Mila, turning away from Georgi with an uplift of her chin.  Georgi sighed dramatically.  Yakov raked his hand through his hair.  He didn’t need this shit at the moment.

 

Katya and Pyotr arrived soon after and surveyed the room before moving to the opposite corner from the drama.  Victor and Yuuri came in with Yura in tow.  They grabbed the chairs between the boys and the couple.  Alexei tromped in and turned a chair backwards next to his sister.  Anya leaned forward to whisper something in his ear and he smirked.  Mila sent a begging gaze towards Yuuri.  A few other skaters made their way into the room followed by Lilia who closed the door.

 

Surveying the room, Lilia nodded sharply.  “Good.  We’re all here.  I suppose you’ve read the headlines about Canada.”  A low buzz answered her question.  She leaned against the door, arms crossed and staring pointedly towards her husband.

 

“Lilia and I have talked and we think, for your safety, it would be best for you all to move back to the mansion.  For those eighteen and younger, you don’t have a choice.  However, for the rest of you the offer is open and highly recommended.”

 

“What do you mean we don’t get a choice?” Yuri scowled.

 

“You and Mila are moving in.  There isn’t enough supervision and security at the dorms to ensure your safety.  Victor will drive you home after the meeting to make sure you pack.  Lilia and I will be by to pick you both up at five.”

 

Mila frowned.  “Wait!  I’m an adult!”

 

“I’ve already talked to Mama and Papa, Mila,” Katya interrupted.  “They want you in the mansion.  Enough to make their financial support commiserate to it.”

 

“What?!!  That’s not fair!  You planned all of this behind our backs.”

 

“Mila!  Enough!” the coach warned.  The redhead shut her mouth but her pout was evident.

 

Dmitry glanced at Ivan before he spoke up.  “I’d like to take you up on that offer.  Some of the residents have made staying at the dorms less enjoyable.  Ivan?”

 

“Agreed.  Can we get…” he trailed off, blushing.

 

“Da!  I know you two are together.  No drama!  We’ll put you in the attic,” Yakov stated, cutting through the crap.  He rolled his eyes and turned to Georgi.  “And you?”

 

He shrugged.  “Can I think it over?  I mean, living in the dorm is fine with Ivan and Dmitry but without them there, maybe not so much.  But...I’m the second oldest.”

 

“I’m not staying,” Anya stated petulantly.  “I’m moving in with my boyfriend.”

 

“You’ve only been dating a week!” Georgi protested.

 

“That you know of,” she stated, narrowing her gaze.

 

“He’s an ass.  You deserve better.”

 

“Like you?” she laughed derisively.

 

Yuuri’s fingers flew over the keys of his phone.

 

**Yuuri/ I really don’t like her.**

**  
** **Vitya/ and you don’t say that often**

 

**Yuuri/ Georgi deserves better.**

 

**Vitya/ he just has to stop being so needy**

 

Katya and Pyotr exchanged glances before she spoke up.  “We are looking close to the University for an apartment.  I mean, we only have this season left and then I’m out.  Pyotr wants to stay close enough to continue working as an assistant coach while I attend classes.”

 

“Vitya?  Yuuri?”  The coach studied them.

 

They exchanged glances surprised.  “We have our own place, Yakov,” Victor stated giving the old coach a look of confusion.

 

“I know that.  But you’ve had a bit of trouble.  Lilia and I talked, and the gate house is available.  We normally house an assistant coach, but at the moment it’s open.”

 

Yuuri shifted, studying his hands.  Victor watched him start tugging at his fingers and then fraying at his sleeves.  The older man responded, “We hadn’t considered that option.  I don’t think...we are prepared to make that decision.”

 

Yakov grunted.  “Well, let us know if you change your mind.”  Glancing around the room, he asked.  “Any others?”  A couple of other skaters decided to join them at the mansion.  Victor and Yuuri offered to help them move, using the SUV.  Decisions made, those moving followed Victor out to his vehicle for a ride back to the dorms to start packing.  Victor promised to return later and pick up the first group of skaters.

 

Pulling out his phone, he dialed the building superintendent once more as he climbed into his car.  The call rang several times before going to voicemail.  Victor left a second message.  “We need approval for a lock change.”  Locking his phone, he tucked it into his pocket.  He huffed in annoyance.  _  I finally get Yuuri to agree to the locks and now I can’t make it happen.  _  He pulled out of the parking lot and returned to the rink.

 

It was a long afternoon, carting their friends and belongings to the mansion, loading and unloading their belongings.  By the time they returned to their apartment to walk the dogs and settle down for the night, they were beat.  Yuuri stretched across the couch, head in Victor’s lap as the older man’s long fingers carded through his hair.  “Do you think Georgi will change his mind?”

 

“I talked to him later and he had saved up to get his own place...but he planned to do so with Anya.  Now Anya has apparently dumped him for a hockey player.”

 

“Please tell me it’s not Mikhail.”

 

Victor frowned.  “I don’t really know.  But he would be enough of an ass to sneak around and steal her away from a nice guy like Georgi.  Still, she said she’s moving in with the guy and I think Mikhail is still in the dorms.”

 

“I don’t get a good feeling about that one.”

 

“Mikhail’s been abusive in past relationships, so good instincts.”

 

“I thought Yura would fight more.”

 

“He said he wished he had moved in with us.  We’re gross but he’d rather be here than there.”

 

“What do you think about Yakov’s offer?  About the gate house?”

 

“It’s smaller but not bad.  I’ve been in there a few times.  It is something to consider when I put this place on the market.  I just...don’t know.  Yakov talked to me about it again after the meeting.  He said it comes with a coaching contract for the two of us.  Similar to what we are doing now.  Part time but we’re both involved.   _ Transitioning _ .  That’s how he put it.  Lilia...she’s still undergoing treatments.”

 

Yuuri frowned.  They had kept her problems quiet and out of rink gossip.  When Yakov and Lilia approached them, they were surprised by the level of trust.  But Victor was the oldest skater at the rink and Yuuri had the training to help Lilia with what she needed.  “When she’s better…”

 

“He still wants us to continue.  He says you are really good with the younger skaters and I work well as a mentor-coach.  Pyotr and I work well together.”

 

“What about Hasetsu?”

 

“Three months off guaranteed after Worlds.  Although Yura will probably show up for choreography.  And Mila may join him.”

 

Yuuri chuckled.  “I suppose there are worse tagalongs.”

 

Victor glanced around the apartment.  “Moving...this has been my home since I was nineteen.”

 

“Were you planning to maintain it after retirement?”

 

Victor frowned.  “I...ummm, no.”

 

“I think...a lot has happened since we arrived.  I don’t want to make a rash decision but...I’m open to considering it.”

 

“And I can reinvest the funds from the sale.  Let them grow for when we retire.”

 

“Nine month half-time coaching contract.  Tantalizing.  I mean, I didn’t mind filling in.  I wouldn’t have dreamed of telling Lilia ‘no’.  Not when she was facing chemo.  The surgery was bad enough.”

 

“But this is most definitely a commitment.”

 

“Let’s think about and decide after China.”

 

Victor smiled.  “Sounds good.”  He stared at the flickering television they’d turned on for background noise.  “I’m sure Lilia would let you look at it.”

 

“Maybe when we take some of the skaters home.  You know they will be begging rides.  It’s not like they can run to the rink now.”

 

“I think that’s...sorta the point.  Forces them to be more cautious of their surroundings.”

 

“Speaking of which, did you arrange those locks?”

 

“I’ve called and left three messages with the building superintendent.  I found the maintenance supervisor and he said that’s one of the few maintenance matters he has to have approved.  And the secretary said he’s gone on a family emergency but she’ll let him know as soon as he checks in.”

 

Yuuri rubbed his forehead then slid his fingers through his hair in annoyance.  “Why does everything always seem to fight us?”

 

Victor smiled down at the beautiful Japanese man in his lap.  “It will be fine,” he reassured him.  “Just a delay...but something we might not be doing if I hadn’t lost my temper.”

 

Yuuri huffed.  “You’re right.  I know this.  It’s just that...now that we’ve decided to do it, I want to get it done.”

 

“I know, love.  We’re both tired.  Let’s go to bed.”

 

Yuuri nodded.  “Okay...I’m ready.”

 

Yuuri allowed Victor to support him, his legs shaky with exhaustion.  He settled on the bed while Victor started to rummage around in the drawers for pajamas.  Pouting, the younger man said, “I don’t think I can be bothered by pajamas.  Let’s just sleep in our underwear.”  Victor turned, smiling indulgently, and nodding sharply in agreement.  Soon Yuuri was cuddled up between his partner and their two dogs.  The myriad of changes and the open threats tormented his dreams, and Yuuri shifted restlessly into the night air.  Victor’s arms tightened around him.  Yuuri settled momentarily but would soon start fighting his dreams once more.  The night did not treat him well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot of stuff going on...


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The China cup.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter closer to...duh duh duh!
> 
> Thanks for reading to my lovely readers!
> 
> And so many thanks for the edits from my friends BluSkates and Magrathea!

* * *

 

 

_China._  The skaters converged on the hotel near the rink finding themselves surrounded by security.  Yuuri found Phichit and immediately held tight to the younger skater.  “This is what it takes.  Canada getting attacked,” Yuuri stated wryly.

 

“Well, nobody attacks Canada.  It’s...unreal.”

 

“Did you know the skater?”

 

“No.  Ciao-Ciao said it was his first year to be ceded into the Grand Prix.  His name was Svenn Kaasen.  From Norway.”

 

“Victor won’t let me read the articles.  Is he...okay?”

 

Phichit frowned.  “As well as can be expected.  They said the attackers were sloppy.  Left a lot of evidence on the body.  Kaasen, it seems, not only agreed to a rape kit but insisted on it.  He’s very outspoken.  There’s something that I’ve noticed, too.  They seem to prefer brunettes.”

 

Yuuri frowned.  “Don’t tell Yura that, he’ll get brave.”

 

“He’s already a risk taker.  But I agree.”

 

Victor draped an arm around Yuuri’s shoulder.  “What are we talking about?”

 

Yuuri gave a guilty shrug.  “Just catching up on skater gossip,” he responded noncommittally.  

 

Victor narrowed his gaze, not fooled by the deflection.  They waited and finally Chris was with them.  “Our rooms are adjoining,” Victor stated.  “I thought that would make it easier.  We can go back and forth without entering the hall.  Yakov and Ciao Ciao are across the hall.  Josef on the other side of Chris.  Georgi on the other side of us.  I told Georgi to call one of us if he wants to leave the room and he agreed.” 

 

“And I told Leo and Guang Hong to call me,” Phichit added.  “We’re all on the same floor.  That will help.”

 

“And everyone knows...okay.  Buddy system in overdrive.  Let’s get settled,” Yuuri stated, leading the way to the elevators.

  
  
  


They bumped into the others on their floor and noticed the security situated near the elevators and the stairs.  “I’ll be glad when they get caught.  I heard they are getting sloppy,” Leo muttered.  Looking over at Yuuri, he asked, “Are you okay?”

 

“As well as can be expected.  Thanks.”

 

“We’re all here for you,” he answered.

 

“Let’s be here for each other,” Yuuri amended, his voice warm and inviting.  The American skater nodded with a smile.

 

It became a pact that would follow through other events.  Pictures posted of them together were tagged  _ #skatebuddies _ as they hung out together between their programs, and one particular selfie of Phichit, Leo, Guang Hong and Yuuri trended for hours.

 

* * *

  
  


Through the monitor provided in the back, Yuuri watched Phichit skate his short.  Victor stepped behind him slipping his arms around his waist.  “He needs at least a silver to go to the final,” Yuuri murmured.

 

“His programs are strong enough,” Victor commented.  “Oh.”  They watch Phichit fall on his quad but quickly recover, not appearing to be shaken.  “He’s holding up well.”

 

“Now if I can do the same.”

 

“Your program is strong,  _ zolotse _ .  And you have the skills.”

 

“I’m nervous, though,” Yuuri admitted, scratching at his arm.  

 

Victor placed a stilling hand over the unconscious action.  Yuuri broke away after Phichit’s performance, returning to warming up.  Chris came up beside Victor.  “Is he okay?”

 

“Nerves.  I’m not sure if it’s performance or Canada.”

 

“Canada has several people thrown off, I think the judges are aware, scores reflect it.  Phichit and I were talking about that photo from Skate America.  It had an electronic signature.  Russia.”

 

“They had to have been in Russia to take the picture of my dining room.”

 

“That’s not what I meant.  The email account.  He was able to trace it back to a Russian account.  He doesn’t think it’s Sasha.  The pictures Sasha sent don’t have the quality.  Phichit doesn’t think he has a good enough camera.”

 

“I’ve never seen him with any expensive photo equipment.  And as far as I know, he hasn’t found another rich boyfriend.  So do you think it’s...them?”

 

“We both do...but we haven’t said anything to Yuuri.  We don’t want to upset him right before a show, and we really weren’t sure  _ if  _ we should tell him, or how.”

 

“I got him to agree to change the locks.  But I can’t reach the building manager.  I may have to circumvent the procedure.”

 

“Does it have to go through him?”

 

“It’s supposed to go through him.  He’s out of town.  His daughter is in the hospital.  I don’t blame him.  I just have my own worries.”

 

Chris pursed his lips.  “Yuuri is stronger than most give him credit for.  He couldn’t do the programs he does without superior stamina and strength.”

 

“And his choreography is maximizing that.”

 

Chris ghosted a smile.  “It’s about his turn.”

 

* * *

  
  


Yuuri skated up to the boards facing Victor.  “Show the world how you charmed the gold from a champion,” Victor murmured before brushing his lips across Yuuri’s forehead.

 

Yuuri pressed his forehead to Victor’s in response.  “Don’t take your eyes off of me.”

 

As he skated off, Victor whispered “never” in his wake.

 

Yuuri turned to face his partner from the start position.  The  [ music  ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AUDR2bflM1s) kicked off and he embraced himself,  licking his lips before offering a smirk.   _ Charm the gold from a champion.  I already have you.  In any way I want you. _  Yuuri moved into his step sequence as the music guided him through the flamenco inspired skate.    _ Of course, you know that you have me as well. _  He landed his first jump.   _ Mind, body, and spirit.  Everything is yours.   _ Yuuri nailed the second jump going directly into a series of seductive step sequence and spins.   _ I can tease you.  Tempt you.  And in return, you’ll take me someplace I’ve never been.  In return, you will claim me all over again.  _  As he wrapped his arms around himself, he continued his thoughts, his eyes on Victor.  _  And only you will know me. _

 

Chris watched from somewhere nearby.  As Phichit came up from behind, he heard a soft giggle.  “That’s when we say KatsuDAMN.”

 

“That was one hot skate.  I look forward to seeing how my program stands up against his.”

 

Phichit leaned forward and whispered in his ear, “Figure-fuck me, Chris.”  Moving out of his reach, his teasing hands slipping away from the older man’s body last, Chris could hear the echo of his giggle as he stepped on the ice.

 

At the kiss and cry, Yuuri settled into Victor’s embrace.  “How did I do?”

 

“Your performance was amazing.”

 

“Do you think the audience liked it?”

 

“Trust me, darling, they loved it.  They loved you.”  Victor tightened his embrace.  “Finally, they scored you properly.”

 

**106.84**

 

Yuuri turned back to Victor, his eyes wide realizing it beat Victor’s Skate America score.  “Keep that up and you’ll break the world record,” his partner teased.  “Let’s join Phichit and watch Chris.”

 

Chris took Phichit’s demand seriously and performed wholly for the man, enticing him and teasing him.  It was hot in an entirely different way than Yuuri’s.  “They’ll have to clean the ice after that performance,” Victor smirked.

 

“I think his eros may be stronger than mine,” Yuuri admitted.  

 

“He’s called ‘sex on ice’ for a reason,” Victor returned.  “But you’re the only one that can tempt me, my vixen.”

 

Yuuri blushed, giving Victor a playful push.

 

* * *

 

The six skaters met together for a late dinner before bed.  Victor, buzzed by the wine, was amorous, nuzzling Yuuri.  Phichit was all over Chris.  Leo and Guang Hong were giggly.  Georgi was heartbroken but doing his best.  And Yuuri...had to be the adult.  Momma Yuuri came out in full force by the time the evening was over.  He had had enough of everyone’s shenanigans and sent them all to bed.

 

Victor snuggled up to Yuuri, his lips very demanding as he pushed Yuuri into the room.  “I’ve been wanting to make love to you since your performance.”

 

“I don’t want to compete with Chris in this arena as well,” Yuuri deadpanned.

 

Victor smirked.  “Trust me.  Chris has nothing on you.”  

 

Yuuri frowned.  He didn’t want to go there.  He never wanted to go there.  Victor’s past sexcapades were a subject he avoided with a wide berth.  “Still, you’re tipsy.”

 

“I’ve had two glasses of wine.  I’m not tipsy, Yuuri.  I’m horny.  You were hot out there on the ice and I was tempted to find a quiet closet and fuck you at the arena.”

 

“Vitya!”  Yuuri’s eyes widened in horror.

 

“Yes, Yuuri.  Now, do you want me or not?”

 

“We can’t have sex.  I skate in two days.”

 

“You can fuck me,” Victor suggested.   “I have many days until I have to perform.”  He watched Yuuri waver.  Leaning forward, he pressed Yuuri into a kiss and the younger man opened up to him with ease pulling him closer.  “Mmmmm...much better,” he murmured into the kiss.  

 

“You’re loud,” Yuuri stated as they broke apart. 

 

“So are you.  And I suspect those two can be quite loud,” Victor replied, jerking a thumb in the direction of Chris’ room.

 

Yuuri’s face pinked up and he glanced at the adjoining door.  He could feel Victor’s hand fiddling with the hem of his shirt and then pushing it up.  Leaning down, he felt Victor’s lips on his abs, tracing the lightly shadowed outline of Yuuri’s muscles, biting and sucking into the softer flesh.  “V-vitya!”

 

“Yes, Yuuri?” he murmured as he continued to push that shirt up, his lips roving up to Yuuri’s chest before capturing one nipple into his lips, sucking and teasing until a moan escaped his lover’s lips.

 

“Oh, god!”

 

“Mmmm, I know,” Victor answered, taking the other nipple in for a similar treatment.

 

Through the wall, they heard a loud moan.  Victor and Yuuri stilled.  More moans escaped the room next door and definite creaking of the springs.  

 

“H-how?” Yuuri hissed.  “They are both performing.”

 

“Between the legs, darling,” Victor supplied and watched his boyfriend blush.

 

“Oh...like…”

 

“...the other day.  Yes.  Would you prefer that?”

 

“I believe you told me to fuck you,” Yuuri protested.

 

“So I did,” Victor smirked.  “We do have that advantage.”  He rolled out from between Yuuri’s legs and reached for the drawer, pulling out the lube and condom.  “Would you like to do the honors?”

 

“Ummm...sure.”  Yuuri took the tube and condom and placed it in reach while considering his approach.  “Why don’t you roll over on your stomach?”  

 

Victor grinned and did as he was bid, his ass going into the air in presentation as he pushed up on his knees and leaned forward.  “How’s this,  _ dorogoy _ ?”

 

Yuuri traced a finger down the cleft of his lover’s ass.  “Very nice,” he murmured, starting to relax.  He squeezed the tube directly onto Victor’s skin and heard a hiss from the older man in response.  Taking his index finger, he began to relax the muscle with circular motions.  Victor didn’t receive often, although he was always willing when Yuuri suggested it.  He rarely asked for it.  He knew Yuuri liked to feel him, the feeling of fullness, the feeling of Victor taking possession of him.  But every so often, Victor liked to reverse the roles and feel himself overtaken.  

 

Yuuri leaned forward and bit into Victor’s ass, sucking into that bite as his finger sank into the older man, the effect causing Victor’s focus to shift and instantly relaxing.  He began to move that finger in and out teasing Victor until the older man moaned “more”.  Another finger added, he worked a matching mark on the other cheek.  As he pulled back admiring his work, he found Victor more than willing to accept the third, groaning into the stretch even as he pushed back into those fingers.  

 

“Please, Yuuri,” he pleaded as the younger man continued to open him up, teasing his prostate.  “I need you now.”

 

Yuuri placed a kiss in the middle of Victor’s back.  “Are you sure?” he whispered.

 

“Mmmhmmm,” the older man moaned.  He could hear the tear of the wrapper and the sound as the latex rolled onto the skin like a promise.

 

Victor’s eyes closed as he felt the press of Yuuri coming into him, filling him, the stretch satisfying even as the muscle stung to accommodate the younger man.  Yuuri stilled as he caught his breath, his eyes studying the man beneath him, stretched and almost purring.  He slowly began his movements, testing them within the older man.  Victor met him, rocking back, accepting all that Yuuri offered him.

 

“Please more,” Victor begged.  “Faster, Yuuri.”

 

And Yuuri was happy to accommodate him, snapping his hips faster earning moans of pleasure as the other man slipped into a mixture of Russian, English, French, Japanese, and maybe a few other languages, babbling nonsense beneath him, Yuuri’s name slipping from those lips intermixed with phrases.

 

“So close,” he managed.  “Please.”

 

Yuuri reached around him, finding his leaking member.  He lubricated his palm with Victor’s precum, gaining a moan from the contact before sliding his hand down Victor’s length.  Giving Victor the strokes he needed, he murmured, “Come for me, Vitya.”

 

The man shouted with his release, and as his walls vibrated down Yuuri, the younger man found himself tumbling over the edge.  

 

Victor collapsed in the bed and as Yuuri withdrew, he groaned in protest.  Yuuri chuckled softly, leaving Victor’s side momentarily to get what was needed to clean him up.  Once he had Victor sorted and settled, Yuuri curled up around him holding him close knowing Victor needed physical contact after making love.

 

“Are you happy now?” Yuuri asked teasingly.

 

“Very,” he responded with a satisfied smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh! Things got a little loud! And Chris and Phichit are next door. You know they aren't gonna let that lie!


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The morning after and Free Skate!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to my friends BluSkates and Magrathea for their time editing this. I hope you all enjoy this chapter!

* * *

 

Yuuri stretched as the morning light filtered through the window.  They had a breakfast date planned with Chris and Phichit before heading to practice.  He gave Victor a playful swat on the ass as he crawled off the bed earning him a groan from the other man.  “Get up!  We have a date!  And I want to shower.”

 

Victor chuckled as he rolled out of bed.  “I’ll join you.”

 

“Shower only...or we’ll be late.” Yuuri warned with a playful warmth in his voice.

 

“They’d forgive us,” Victor murmured, coming up from behind.  “I could suck you off as you wash my hair.  Very efficient.”

 

“I…” he paused as if he was considering it, “don’t think so.  It’s already going to be awkward.”

 

Victor gave his ass a squeeze.  “Remember, we heard them as well.”

 

“T-true,” Yuuri conceded as he was led into the shower.  When did they trade places?

 

Victor ran his hands over Yuuri’s body reaching down to grab his length.  “We need to deal with this problem.”

 

Yuuri dropped his head against Victor’s shoulder.  “Make it quick,” he finally agreed.

 

“Mmmm…” Victor agreed, dropping to his knees before his lover.  His warm mouth on him without preamble.  A soft moan slipped from Yuuri’s lips.   _God, the things Victor could do with his mouth!_ True to his word, he had Yuuri coming in minutes.  Standing up, he greeted Yuuri with a very satisfied smile.

 

Yuuri dropped down to return the favor, although not quite as efficiently as his hands danced over Victor’s torso, his lips savored the length, and then he finally sucked him down deep.  He could feel Victor’s long fingers repeatedly sliding through his hair.  He hummed in response receiving a moan in answer.  Yuuri’s hands tightened their hold on Victor’s cheeks as he continued to lavish attention on his erection.  God, the lewd sounds coming from his lover.  If their friends were still in their room...Victor released with a shout.  Of course, he did.  Victor never did anything without drama.  Yuuri finished him off with an eye roll as he stood up.

 

Victor just grinned.  “You are always amazing, my Yuuri,” he added pulling the other man closer.  Of course, their morning activities forced them to be even more efficient with their shower administrations.  They headed out into the hall with wet hair, slipping their shoes on as they headed towards the elevator.

 

They entered the dining hall and met Chris leaning on his fist, a smile like the cat who caught the canary.  Then the waggle of Phichit’s eyebrows was icing on the cake.  Yuuri’s face went scarlet and he started to squirm under their regard even as Victor’s firm hand guided him into the room.  He pulled the chair out for his lover and seated him with care.

 

“So it appears you both had a good morning,” Chris murmured.

 

“And it sounded like the night went even better,” Phichit added with a grin.

 

Victor raised an eyebrow and studied his nails nonchalantly.  “My neighbors weren’t the quietest in their activities, either.”

 

“I don’t know,” Chris murmured.  “I think we refrained from crying out each other’s name.”

 

“What can I say?  Yuuri is hot!”  He reached under the table and squeezed Yuuri’s thigh.  During all of this, Yuuri disappeared slowly behind his hands, his face beet red, his body radiating heat.  “Very hot,” Victor added teasingly.  He reached out and slowly pried those hands away.  “Don’t hide, love.  Let them see your pretty face.”

 

Yuuri’s hands slowly dropped but the blush remained on his face a bit longer.  As they ordered the American style breakfast of eggs and sausage, comments deteriorated into bad jokes about the visual aspect of sausages.  Yuuri kept trying to hide under the table but Victor refused to allow that mercy.  Finally, breakfast was over and they parted to get ready for practice.

 

* * *

  
  


Security grew more restless during the free skate, putting Yuuri and the rest of the skaters on edge.  Yuuri finished the previous skate in first place, so he would be the last skater of the evening in the men’s single division.  He nervously paced, watching the other skaters, until Victor pulled him to the side.  “Come.  Let’s find someplace quiet.”

 

“Security wants us to stay together.”

 

“I know.  I’m not going to isolate you.  It’s not like we’re going to the parking garage.  Just the dressing room.  It’s relatively empty right now.”

 

Yuuri took a deep breath and nodded.  Following Victor’s lead, they navigated the crowd and found their goal.  Victor settled Yuuri down in front of him.  “Now, love, I want you to relax.”

 

“I’m going to fuck up,” he protested.

 

“Shhh,” Victor demanded.  He guided Yuuri through the various calming exercises they worked on with Sasaki-sensei and others.  As Victor guided Yuuri’s breathing to a state of calm, he feathered his fingers through the younger man’s hair.  “My beautiful Yuuri, why are you worried?  You’re perfect.  No matter what happens on the ice, that’s what I see.  Because I know you.”

 

Yuuri dropped his head against the older man’s shoulder.  “The crowd feels crushing.  The pressure feels crushing.”

 

“Don’t skate for the crowd.  Skate...because you love it.  Show them that love.  Show me your love.”

 

Yuuri took a deep, cleansing breath.  As they left the room, he approached the rink.  It was almost time for his skate.

 

As Yuuri skated to stand before him, he dropped his forehead to the older man’s, their arms threading together.

 

“I believe in you...even when you don’t believe in yourself, remember.  I believe in you.”

 

Yuuri leaned in and brushed their lips lightly together.  “Thank you,” he whispered.  Then he turned to skate into position.  The commentators finishing their introductory spiel, Yuuri waited for his music cue.  [ Yuuri on Ice ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rwvF1Lgh61w&list=PLqQR2rKU30kK2-rOT3-FyGaGFDTEK6_Ro&index=61) tumbled through the piano keys and the skater began telling his story.

 

_My story on ice started with you, Vitya.  Seeing you skate inspired me to push myself further and for as long as I can remember, I’ve been chasing you.  I didn’t feel the love that was so generously given to me until I saw it through your eyes, however.  The day you physically walked into my life was the day that changed my life forever.  And you followed me to hell just to bring me back.  My story begins and ends with you, Vitya.  I dance for you.  Always for you.  Because you are my inspiration.  You teach me to reach beyond myself.  And even when I feel lost and alone, I can look up and find you reaching out to me, pulling me out of the darkness.  You never leave me for long.  You are there, like a lifeline, showing me my worth, my value.  I am yours._

 

With a bit of defiance, he lined up for a quad flip, smirking because he knew Victor would be surprised.  He dug in his pick and launched pulling his body in tight on the spins.  1...2...3...4.  He landed, touching down but enough rotations.  He wrapped up his story reaching towards Victor.   _My future lies by your side._

 

Skating to meet him at the boards, Victor shook his head before pulling him into a deep kiss.  The cameras were becoming used to this couple’s public displays of affection.  Some even sought them out.  Victor guided him to the bench and they waited for his scores.

 

Everyone was thrown off a little by Canada, their scores not quite to par.   Still, Phichit took gold ensuring his place in the final and Yuuri hugged his best friend proudly from the second place podium.  Chris stood on third looking up to his lover with open affection.  Phichit’s expression glowed with pride and happiness.  There is no way Thailand would be taken lightly in the skating world.  He’s made his mark.  He’ll be one of the top six skaters.

 

* * *

  
  


Yuuri breathed a sigh of relief to finally be home.  Ivan greeted them warmly calling Makkachin to settle down.  “How was the trip?”

 

“Exhausting.  After Canada, the security has increased.”

 

“That’s good, though, right?”

 

Yuuri frowned.  “It shouldn’t be necessary.  But yes, it’s good.  Just tiring.  A lot of people were on edge.”

 

“No Dmitry?” Victor asked with a raised eyebrow.

 

Ivan chuckled.  “No.  He went home with the others.  Yuri conned him into homework help.  Geometry.  He can have it.  I’ll hang with the mutt.”

 

Victor’s mouth opened in shock as he dramatically covered Makkachin’s ears.  “We don’t use such language around the d-o-g.  She doesn’t even know she’s a d-o-g.”

 

This pulled a laugh from the other two men.  Yuuri sighed wearily as he dragged his suitcase into the bedroom.  He stilled and narrowed his eyes.   “Vitya?”

 

“Yes, _dorogoy_?”  Victor poked his head into the bedroom.  “What’s up?”

 

“It’s just that...something is off.”

 

Victor glanced around the room before shrugging.  “I don’t see anything.  Our nerves might just be on edge after China,” he suggested.

 

Yuuri frowned.  “Don’t.  Don’t do that.  When you discount my concerns, it makes me doubt myself.”

 

“I’m sorry,” Victor apologized immediately.  “I didn’t think.  I’ll ask Ivan if he’s noticed anything off while he stayed here.”

 

Yuuri nodded.  He walked around the room.  Small things moved but a few things had small dust foot prints.  A couple of the pictures were knocked askew.  Yuuri pulled them down and looked behind them but nothing.  He reentered the living room to catch Ivan’s response.

 

“...Makka’s been in and out out of the bedroom.  Smelling things and huffing.  She could have knocked something around.  I know I picked a photo up off the floor.  The one of Yuuri on the nightstand.”

 

Yuuri frowned, retreating back to the bedroom picking up the photo.  It was of Yuuri and Cocoa.  It matched the one on the other side of Victor and Makkachin.  He lifted up the picture and looked around the edge of the frame before putting it back.

 

Victor came into the room and studied his partner.  Yuuri shrugged, feeling foolish.  “Things are out of place...just barely.  I don’t know.  It’s weird.”

 

“I’ll call the building superintendent and ask once more about those locks.  If I have to, I’ll call a locksmith myself.  I mean, I own the apartment.  I should have a say in the locks.”

 

Yuuri frowned but nodded.  “Are we taking Ivan home tonight?”

 

“He said he’ll go home from the rink tomorrow.  I’m going to take him and drop him off in the morning.”

 

“O-okay.  I think...I want to shower and put on my pj’s.  Can we order delivery?”

 

“I’m on it.  Anything in particular?”

 

“Surprise me,” Yuuri responded not in the mood to make decisions.

 

Yuuri emerged half an hour later as the delivery arrived from an Italian restaurant called Mama Romas.  The three skaters gave into their impulse and enjoyed the cheesy fats of the pepperoni pizza.  “Don’t tell Dmitry.  He might not forgive me for breaking diet without him,” Ivan declared with a wink.  Yuuri and Victor laughed in response.  The tension in the air dissipated.

 

Yuuri finally settled into bed, arms wrapped around the chocolate poodle, Victor molded to his back.  Makkachin could be heard huffing on the other side of her owner.  Yuuri smiled, feeling the warmth of his family surrounding him.  “Good night, Vitya.”

 

“Good night, _lyubov moya_.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know...family emergencies vs. locks. What can you do?


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sick Yuuri...home Yuuri...curled up in a ball...  
> Sleepy Yuuri...sniffy Yuuri...someone's in the hall...
> 
> This chapter has all the creep factor coming to a head. So get your comfort items at hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *scurries into room and sets out chocolate, fuzzy blankets, makkachin tissue boxes*
> 
> Thank you all for reading my updates...

* * *

 

A storm moved into St. Petersburg, causing Yuuri’s head to stuff up.  He tried to push himself out of bed but found his frown as he dropped back down.  Victor came out of his shower and took one glance at his skater.  “You’re staying home.”

 

“Yakov won’t let you miss,” Yuuri argued.

 

“No, he won’t.  But you are staying home.  Makka and Cocoa will keep you company and I will come home for lunch to check on you.”

 

Yuuri open his mouth to protest but a cough alerted him to his sore throat.  “This had better not be strep,” he moaned.

 

Victor touched his forehead with the back of his hand and frowned.  “You definitely have a fever, baby.  Sleep.  Take some cold meds.  I’ll see how you are doing at noon.  Okay?”

 

Defeated, Yuuri nodded, his glassy eyes swimming and achy.

 

* * *

  
  


At noon, Victor found Yuuri asleep, his head still hot with temperature.  Victor frowned, debating whether he should call the doctor or not and get some antibiotics.  Calling Yakov, the old man told him to take Yuuri in and be back after settling him back home.

 

Yuuri protested at having been awakened from his sleep, but it was weak as his throat hurt.  The doctor determined strep and had him on a strong series of antibiotics to get him back on his feet.  He checked Victor as well but the older man’s immunity seemed to be holding strong.

 

Back home, Victor made Yuuri soup then put him back to bed with the promise to be home after practice.  Yuuri mumbled an unintelligible response.

 

The next two days continued to be rainy.  Yuuri fought his illness and migrated between couch and bed.  Victor came and went as practice allowed, checking on Yuuri during extended lunch breaks.  On the third day, Victor needed to stay late and Yuuri, feeling a little better, waved him off.

 

“Hopefully I’ll be back on the ice by tomorrow,” he croaked as he sipped the hot tea.  “Go.  Skate.”

 

Victor frowned, studying the younger man, but finally nodded in agreement.

 

In his absence, the storm picked up; somewhere in the rolling of the thunder and the cracking of the lightning, Yuuri dozed off on the couch.  A low growl pulled him from his sleep.  Yuuri blinked.  The room had darkened, and it took a moment to realize that even the low hum of appliances was missing.

 

He stared at the ceiling, listening.  Then he heard it.  A shuffle.  Cocoa’s warning growl.  Makkachin’s whine.  Something was wrong.  He shot up, alert, peering into the darkness.  Slowly, his eyes adjusted and he could see the blurred outline of a figure in the shadows.

 

“Who’s there?” he demanded.

 

The figure stepped forward and Yuuri moved back, widening his stance, making sure he wasn’t boxed in, all of the things he learned in his self-defense classes started moving into his thoughts.

 

“Yuuuri, my dear,” the voice broke through the shadows, insinuating, sickly sweet.  And Yuuri knew.  He knew that voice.  He knew who was there.  In the darkness.  Waiting for him.

 

“Sasha,” he breathed his realization, his body tightening.  _  Stay calm.  Stay calm.  Don’t panic. _

 

“I’ve come for you.  I found us a place.  We can be together now.”  The figure moved in and out of his focus as it circled the room, saying these things.  Yuuri watched and turned with him, making sure he wasn’t backed into the corner.   _ If I can make it to the door, run.  Don’t fight to win.  Fight to survive.  Fight to escape. _

 

Sasha remained between him and the door, however.  Although he moved, he kept his body between Yuuri and Yuuri’s escape.   _ The bedroom.  It has a lock.  Would that stop him?   _ Yuuri’s mind started analyzing the strength of the artist’s muscles.  He knew definition and the strength signified by musculature.  Sasha was long and lithe but not undefined.

 

Sasha lunged and Yuuri snapped, swinging, felt impact with flesh, watched him stumble back.  Still between Yuuri and the door.  Still moving.  Still dangerous.  Yuuri retreated towards the bedroom.  Closing the door, the dogs close to his legs.

 

The lock turned, he looked for his phone.   _ Damn.  It’s in the other room.  _  Then he heard it.  The scraping of the lock.  His eyes widening.  He was trapped.  And it was this point the panic threatened to overwhelm him.  He looked around for something, anything.  “Cocoa, guard!”  Then he saw Makkachin.   _ Would she know such commands? _  “Makka, guard!”  Both dogs crossed over in between him.

 

He felt his thoughts overwhelming him.   _ Not now not now not now not now. _  The lock turned.  He was in the room.  Yuuri backed up.  “Nonononononono.”  He backed up, away.  “Please don’t.  Don’t hurt me.”  He was back there, in the hotel room.  They were on top of him, behind him, restraining him.  He couldn’t process the difference between what happened and what was happening now.

 

There was barking, growling, confusion, a cry of pain, a rush from the animals, a slamming of the door.  Yuuri curled into a small space, no longer in the bedroom he shared with Victor, but in Sochi, in the darkened room, his hands tied, his body brutalized, words...lost.

 

* * *

  
  


With the power outage, Victor helped Yakov clear the rink.  Frowning, he told Yakov he needed to get home.  He had a bad feeling.  The old coach nodded and sent him away.  The drive was brutal.  Driving rain, lack of streetlights, total darkness.  He finally pulled into the parking garage.  Using his phone, he made his way to the stairwell that would take him to the ground floor so that he could cross over to his building.

 

In the building, there was some confusion.  The doorman offered him a towel and told him he’d have to take the stairs.  The emergency lights lit the way.  Victor climbed two at a time.  He couldn’t shake the sense of foreboding.  Stepping out of the stairwell, he spotted Makka in the hallway.  The dog ran up to him and barked.

 

“Why are you in the hall, girl?” he asked in surprise.  Makka turned and raced back to the door.  It was shut but as Victor turned the knob, it wasn’t locked.  The silver haired man felt a chill up his spine.  Opening the door, he could barely make out the room in the darkness.  Walking through the familiar space, he stumbled over something in the floor, out of place.  He pulled out his phone and hit the flashlight app.  The disarray made it obvious there had been a struggle.

 

“Yuuri!” he shouted, fear edging his voice.  A whimper could be heard from the bedroom.  He entered the space.  More chaos.  Casting the light about the room, he spotted Cocoa first in guard stance, growling in warning to his presence.  “Stand down, Cocoa,” he commanded.  The dog whimpered but then laid down.  He then spotted Yuuri behind her, crouched under the desk, his knees brought to his chest.

 

Victor was immediately at Yuuri’s side, on his knees, reaching for him.  Yuuri shrank back.  “Baby, it’s me.  It’s Victor.  You’re safe now.”

 

Yuuri regarded him, his eyes wide with fear, uncertain, disconnected.  Victor knew he had to bring him back.  He began to talk slowly and firmly.  “You know me, Yuuri.  You’ve said time and time again that I’m your safe place.  I need you to trust me know.  I need you to come out to me.  No one is here.  Just you.  Me.  Cocoa.  And Makkachin.  Come to me, Yuuri.”

 

The smaller man cautiously started to unfold, then his movements increased in speed until he was in the older man’s arms clinging tightly.  Yuuri safe in his arms, Victor pulled out his phone.  The first call he made to the police.  The second one to Yakov.

 

“Yakov, someone broke into our house.”

 

“Who?”

 

“I...don’t know yet.  Yuuri’s not talking.”

 

“He was there?  Is he okay?”

 

“I’m trying to figure that out.  I’ve called the police.  I don’t see any signs of injury.  He’s just terrified.”

 

“I want you to come here!” the coach said in a voice that didn’t offer negotiation.

 

“After I deal with the police...and maybe the hospital.  But yes, we’ll be there.”

 

“Call me if you need me there.”

 

“I will. Thank you, Yakov.”  He hung up and focused his attention on Yuuri.  The man was tucked under Victor’s chin clinging tightly.  “Yuuri, honey, will you talk to me?”

 

The other man shook his head hanging onto Victor tightly.  Victor helped Yuuri to his feet.  They looked around and found the smaller man’s phone.  “What happened?” Victor asked again.

 

Yuuri frowned, digging for words.  Finally, he unlocked his phone and typed the word.   _ Sasha. _

 

Victor sucked in his breath.  “How did he get in?”

 

_ Keys.  Had bedroom keys too. _

 

“Oh, baby...I left you alone.  Unprotected.  I tried to get those locks changed.”

 

_ I know.  I was stubborn.  Should have sooner. _

 

“It’s not your fault.”

 

_ Sasha’s fault.  Still scared. _

 

“The police are on the way.  We’ll file charges.  He’ll be arrested.”

 

_ No hospital.  I got away.  Cocoa and Makka protect.  Good dogs. _

 

“Yes, they are.”

 

_ Dogs okay? _

Victor called them to their side and began running his hands down their bodies.  “I don’t see any injuries.”

 

Yuuri’s fingers then flew over the buttons as his head started to clear up.

 

_ I fought.  He didn’t get me. _

 

_ He wanted to take me away. _

 

_ But then...I thought I was in Sochi. _

 

_ Cocoa guard.  Makka guard. _

 

_ Sasha leave. _

 

_ I hide. _

 

_ Couldn’t move. _

 

_ Waited for Victor. _

 

“I’m here now.”

 

_ Scared. _

 

“I know.”

 

A knock on the door startled them along with an announcement for the police.  Victor explained that his partner was having difficulty communicating verbally due to his anxiety but could use his phone.  The first officer suggested they come downtown while others began to take crime photos of the apartment.

 

At the station, the forensic specialist took clippings from Yuuri’s nails and the dogs as well as other evidence from their bodies.  Paperwork was filed and an arrest warrant was made.  Sasha would be charged with assault, attempted kidnapping, and breaking and entering.

 

As they prepared to leave, Yuuri balked and whined.  Victor turned towards him.

 

_ I don’t want to go back. _

 

_ Scared. _

 

“We’re going to Yakov’s.  We can’t get in our home right now anyway.”

 

Yuuri nodded and followed him to the car.

 

By the time Victor pulled into the drive at Yakov and Lilia’s, Yuuri was fading into sleep.  The lights were on, indicating power had been restored.  Yakov met them in the entrance and Lilia approached Yuuri.  Lifting his chin, she studied his face.  “You will be fine.  It’s behind you.  It’s safe here.”

 

Yuuri opened his mouth to speak but the words didn’t come.  He reached for his phone.  _ Thank you. _

 

“Of course.  Let’s get you settled.”  She led them upstairs, her arm protectively around Yuuri.  The other skaters watched as the couple were led past their doors.

 

“Is he okay?” Yuri asked, his voice worried.

 

Victor reached out and squeezed his hand.  “He will be.  Sasha is being arrested.”

 

Victor followed Yuuri and Lilia into their temporary residence and the ballet instructor left them.  “Sleep?”  Yuuri shrugged.  “Shower?”  Yuuri lifted his chin and nodded.  Victor led Yuuri through the familiar house and into the bathroom.  As he started to leave, he felt a hand reach for him.  “Do you want me to stay close?”  Yuuri nodded.  Victor ministered to his partner, undressing him, settling him into the small shower.  They would have to go out tomorrow to get a change of clothes.  He’ll call the police to see how long it will be before they get into their apartment again.

 

The shower seemed to soothe Yuuri, and he settled into bed.  However, soft cries in the night told Victor they had more therapy ahead.  It was expected.   _ But...Yuuri fought.  Yuuri used the dogs.  And Sasha didn’t get to him. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *refills chocolates*
> 
> So...he made it. He survived. He's safe. No dogs were harmed in this...not truly. They are really good puppies. 
> 
> Thanks, BluSkates and Magrathea, for taking care of me through this arc. It's much appreciated.


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aftermath of Sasha.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a Sasha chapter to post later...but alas, I'm at work and it's on my computer at home. ;)
> 
> Thanks so much to BluSkates and Magrathea for the edits. I did change the last scene at the last minute. :)

* * *

 

Yuuri’s eyes fluttered open and he stared at the unfamiliar light.   _ Where am I?  What happ- _

 

_ Oh. _

 

_ Oh! _

 

He sat up, panicked until he saw Victor curled up next to him on his side.  Dogs were knotted up into balls on the floor.  The bed was small, perhaps a full or somewhere close to it.  The covers were disheveled.  _  I probably slept restlessly. _  He reached over and smoothed Victor’s hair back.  He looked tired, worn.  _  I put you through so much.  Yet you stay close to me...always...never leaving. _

 

Yuuri sighed, pushing back the remains of the covers then tucking it back around Victor.   _ He must have watched over me in my restlessness last night and now he’s exhausted. _  Yuuri crept softly across the floor and stared into the mirror.  He didn’t look any worse for the wear.

 

Opening the door, he peeked out in the hallway, recollections of a bathroom touching the dim thoughts.  Everything was still, open doors suggested the others were gone.   _ Oh, Yakov and Lilia have probably left for the rink.  And we’re still here.   _ He crossed the hall at a diagonal and made his way into the bathroom.

 

After taking care of his immediate needs, he found a washcloth and towel, making his way into the shower. _I wish I had a change of clothes._ _We...didn’t bring anything but the dogs.  Can we go home?  Do I...want to?_

 

He slipped under the warm water, the pressure of old pipes reminded him of the apartment he shared with Phichit.  Some days it was good, other days it produced a stream but not a spray.  He could make do.  A stirring in the hallway turned Yuuri’s attention from the shower, then a knock sounded at the door.

 

“Yuuri?”

 

“I’m in here, Vitya,” he answered, poking his head around the shower curtain.   _ Oh.  I couldn’t speak last night.  I seem to have recovered more quickly than usual.  Sasaki-sensei said it was tied to feeling safe.  Victor makes me safe. _

 

The door opened and Yuuri held weary blue eyes.  “It will be tight but you can join me,” Yuuri invited.

 

Victor breathed a sigh of relief.  “They wanted to send you to the hospital last night,” he stated as he undressed, slipping into the narrow shower stall.  “I knew you just needed time.”  He drew Yuuri into his embrace, felt the other man rest his head into the crook of his neck.

 

Yuuri frowned thinking back.  “I was scared...and things became confused.  I remember him being there then...I was back in Sochi.  And I couldn’t break out of it.”

 

“I know, love,” Victor agreed, brushing a kiss into his hair.  “You kept your wits about long enough to command the dogs to guard.  I think Makka chased him out.  He was locked out of the apartment.  When I found you, Cocoa was guarding you.”

 

“Is it over?”  Yuuri clung to him even as Victor’s arms tightened around him protectively.

 

“There is an arrest warrant out for Sasha.  I haven’t received notification that he’s been caught.”

 

Yuuri closed his eyes on the sting of tears.  “I’m tired of fighting.  I just want to live my life.”

 

“I know, Yuuri...but fight you did.”  

 

Yuuri nodded against his chest.  “He didn’t get me.”

 

“No, he didn’t.  I’m just s-sorry I didn’t p-protect you better.”  His voice broke and he pressed his cheek against Yuuri’s head.

 

Yuuri stepped back and held his eyes.  “Do  _ not _ blame yourself for what another man did to me.  Don’t do that.  You aren’t responsible for his behavior.”

 

“But I feel responsible,” Victor frowned, his shoulders heavy with emotion.  “He never showed me that side of himself and I never suspected it of him.”

 

“He’s an actor.  He performed his part until he had nothing to lose.”

 

“So when we kicked him out…”

 

“The mask dropped, I think he became more desperate.”

 

“That doesn’t make me feel better.  I just want to keep you safe.”

 

“I want us  _ both _ to be safe.  I want to continue taking self defense classes...and I want you to take them with me.  We have one enemy either arrested or soon to be arrested.  But... _ they _ are still out there.”

 

“You are right.  And we don’t know how close they’ve gotten.  So we’ll continue to be cautious.”  They stepped out of the shower and dried off.  “And we need to get some clean clothes.  Let me find out if we can get into our apartment.  If not, we’ll need to go pick up a few things.”

 

“Vitya...I don’t want to stay there.”  Yuuri looked up at him imploringly.

 

“I know.  About Yakov’s offer...do you want the coaching contract?”

 

“I feel young...inexperienced.  What can they learn from me?”

 

Victor traced his fingers around his chin.  “They already learn from you.  This is just formalizing the agreement.  You will be Lilia’s assistant and I’ll be one of Yakov’s assistants.”

 

“And they need our help.  I...think I could be at peace taking the offer.  I was leaning that direction already.”

 

“Me, too.  This...was the deciding factor.  I want you to be safe, Yuuri.”

 

“Is it truly safer here?”

 

“A little secret...the people who work this property, the groundskeepers, the driver, the butler...they know how to protect the property.  I don’t know Madame Lilia’s connections...except that she comes from old money.  But she’s always been well protected.”

 

“And by extension, so are the other residents.”

 

“Exactly.  So...shall we?”

 

Yuuri nodded.  “Yes.  I want to do this.  Let’s make it official.”

 

“Good.  Besides...we can be close to Yura this way.”

 

* * *

  
  


Their apartment was closed off by the police but they would release its contents by the end of the week.  They did go down to the station to complete their statement now that Yuuri could speak.  While there, they learned that Sasha had been apprehended relatively quickly and were surprised that he didn’t put up any resistance.  They filled the rest of the day in the stores picking up fresh clothes and basics.  When Yakov and Lilia returned, they had another body in tow.  Georgi had decided to join them.  When he walked through the door, he burst into tears, wrapping his arms around Yuuri.  “I’m so relieved you’re okay.”

 

Yuuri offered him a small smile.  “Th-thank you.  At this point, I’m just weary.  I’m tired of everyone coming after me.”

 

“Vitya went through a year like that,” Yakov recalled.  “He had one crazy fan after another.  We finally set a precedent by suing one of them.  The others backed off when he won.”

 

“I don’t think a lawsuit will stop the ones that attacked me,” Yuuri frowned.

 

“No, we just have to find their weakness,” Yakov stated, his stare intense.

 

Yuuri glanced up at Victor before saying in a small voice, “It’s me.”

 

Victor’s eyes widened in surprise.  “Why do you say that?”

 

“I don’t know.  With me, they took their first chance at an international event.  With me, they threatened those close to me.  They made direct contact.  They risked trying to silence me...and I wouldn’t be surprised if they tried it again.  I don’t know why...they do it publicly.  I don’t know why me.”

 

“You remember their faces,” Victor suggested.

 

Yuuri nodded, uncertainly.   _ Maybe _ .  “And the scent of their cheap cologne...and the sound of their voices...and their words.  I remember everything.  It’s replayed almost every night in my dreams.”

 

“And still you skate,” Dmitry stated, admiration in his voice.

 

Yuuri shook his head with a hard frown.  “I won’t let them take that from me.  Maybe that’s the difference.  I won’t be silenced.  The others retired or went low key after the attack.  If that’s the case, then the skater attacked in Canada will experience much of the same.”

 

“So what are your plans?” Lilia asked.

 

Yuuri and Victor exchanged glances.  “We want to take you both up on your offers...at least until Victor finally decides to retire.  I think it will be good training for our next phase of life.”

 

Lilia nodded sharply.  “Good.  This is where you belong for now.  Let’s go out to the gatehouse and let you both have a look around.”  She disappeared into her office and returned a few minutes later with the keys.  “It was cleaned when the last person left but it probably could use a dusting and airing.”

 

Yuuri smiled and offered a half shrug.  “I don’t mind.”

 

Both Yakov and Lilia looked at Victor doubtfully.  His eyes widened.  “What?!!  I can clean!”

 

“Are you sure about that?  I remember you having a cleaning service before you left,” Ivan pointed out.

 

“Not you, too!  Tell them, Yuuri!”

 

Yuuri chuckled before hugging Victor.  “He did help out at the inn.  Kept him on my sister’s good side, I think,” Yuuri teased.

 

Victor pouted but accepted the smaller man’s affections.  Lilia grunted then motioned them to follow her.  It seemed that everyone took the invitation because the entire crew stepped outside and followed them down the drive.  “A small carport is attached.  You can park your car there.  You’ll may have to help us cart other residents, but that shouldn’t be a problem.”  She inserted the key and turned the lock, opening the door.  Leading the way, she ran her fingers down the surface and frowned.  “It’ll need cleaning.  You can get supplies from the house if you need them.”

 

“Perhaps we can get the house in order while we are waiting for our things to be released by the police,” Yuuri suggested.  But he smiled as he looked around.  This place was more Yuuri, less modern, more traditional...homey.  “Does the fireplace work?”

 

“It should.  I’ll make sure it is swept and in good order before you move in completely.  You can stay in the main house until it’s ready.”

 

They explored the house, entering from the garage door to the the kitchen, which led into a dining room flowing directly into the living room.  On the other side was the main entrance.  The second floor held a  single bedroom of decent size, an office/sitting room, and bathroom.  Closets were less spacious, but they can send things back home to Hasetsu.  Victor and Yuuri were already cataloging what would stay and what would go.  “I think I’m going to have to sell a few things,” Victor admitted.  There were already a few furnishings in the house.  And Victor’s style wouldn’t reflect that of the house.  “I’ll keep my favorite pieces of furniture but several items were picked from the designer.”

 

It was Yuri who initiated the next move.  “You know, we could help you both clean it.  It’s not like it’s trashed or anything.”

 

Ivan scruffed his hair.  “You just want to get out of doing Geometry tonight.”

 

The blonde shrugged dismissively.  Ivan wasn’t wrong.  Lilia and Yakov left them to it and within an hour, the skate family had the tiny house wiped down and swept.  Ivan and Dmitry began systematically mopping.  Georgi vacuumed the area rugs with Mila helping him move furniture.  Yuuri and Victor were joined by the tiger to wipe out cabinets and line the shelves.  When they left that evening, the gatehouse was ready to move in and Victor made promises to make dinner one evening after they settled.

 

* * *

  
  


A week passed by and they finally were allowed back into their apartment.  Yuuri was more reluctant than Victor, but the older man made sure it was a bright day.  As they went through their things, Victor quickly decided what furniture would follow them, placing labels for the movers.  As Yuuri stood next to the chest of drawers looking through his lingerie, he frowned.  “Vitya, I just...I want to start fresh with this.  I know he’s touched these things.  I have pieces missing.”

 

“Missing?”

 

“I didn’t say anything when I first suspected, but yes.  I just...let’s get rid of anything we didn’t have with us in Hasetsu.”  

 

Yuuri began sorting through the lot.  He didn’t have much in Hasetsu and Victor realized those were the only pieces he wore since they arrived in St. Petersburg.  Yuuri’s fingers stilled as he reached the bottom of the drawer.  He drew out a shaky hand, an envelope in his fingers.  

 

“Yuuri?” Victor asked, worried by the pallor in his partner’s face.  He went to his side and dislodged the envelope.  A quick scan revealed Sasha’s handwriting.  Victor tucked it away.  “It’s over, Yuuri.  We don’t need to read this.  Okay?”

 

Yuuri nodded, burying his face into Victor’s chest.  “W-will you finish?  I’ve already packed what I want to keep.”  Victor nodded watching Yuuri part and move to the closet.

 

Yuuri picked through the dresses, selected the ones he wanted to keep, placing the others in a discard pile.  Victor soon joined him and removed out of date clothes.  Soon they had their closet pared down.  “I’m tempted to auction my old costumes.”

 

Yuuri looked at him in surprise.  “Really?”

 

“Yes...it can go towards your charity work.  Didn’t you do the same with yours?”

 

Yuuri nodded.  “If I knew it wasn’t something I’d make over, I donated it to the cause.  Thank you, Vitya.”  He stepped into Victor’s space, lifting his lips for a kiss.  “I love you.”

 

Victor smiled and deftly placed them into containers, labeling them for the auction house.  More and more items piled up.  Keep.  Hasetsu.  Donate.  Auction.  The sort was brutal and it took no prisoners, not ending until the apartment was properly labeled for movers and shippers.  As the shadows elongated, Victor could see Yuuri shifting uncomfortably, eager to leave.  He made the arrangements and as they left, the information was given to the building manager.  “All that’s left is to put the condo up for sale.”

 

“Are you sure?” Yuuri asked uncertainly.

 

Victor nodded.  “I don’t think either of us can stay there after what happened.”

 

* * *

  
  


Two days later found the couple unpacking to stay at their house.  "Yuuri, where do you want this?"

 

Yuuri turned from where he was standing by a box.  "Do you still have that thing?  And why isn't it in Hasetsu?"

 

Victor shrugged.  "I think it follows me," he responded as he settled the marble bust on the top of the dresser.

 

Yuuri frowned before reaching into a small box to the left.  "Might as well put it to use."  He placed a hat on its head and then wrapped a scarf around it.  Victor grinned.  "Wherever did you get this?"

 

"It was left over from a photoshoot."

 

"Good.  I was worried a certain artist might have made it," Yuuri responded with a frown.

 

Victor shook his head.  "He didn't dabble in 3D.  I mean, he had to take the course.  He hated it.  It didn't show him at his best."

 

"And as narcissistic as he was, that wouldn't do," Yuuri surmised.

 

Victor nodded but Yuuri could see the sadness in the shadows of his face.  "How did I not know, Yuuri?"

 

"Because when you care about someone, you only look for the best in them, Vitya," Yuuri murmured as he moved close to his lover, his hand sliding up Victor's arm.  "I'm just sorry I didn't get a chance to know the good part of him.  Perhaps...if we'd...I don't know.  I keep thinking if there was a way for this to end well.  I guess...I'm looking for the good, too?  Is that wrong?  You had to have seen something."

 

"He never talked much about his past.  His childhood...was hard.  He was relieved to go into the children's village.  His parents...I think they were alcoholics, drug addicts.  Heroine, I think.  He painted several canvases that showed his hate for drugs.  But...he was hard to get close to...like he was guarding a part of himself, always waiting for everything to fall apart.  I don't know.  Maybe part of me thought I could save him from himself.  But I knew I wasn't in love with him.  So...we became friends.  He always did something to wreck his relationships.  I don't know if it was the choices he made...or if he just...Yuuri?  I don't know what to say."

Finally, taking a break, Victor pulled out his phone.  “Oh, I missed a call from Chris.  I’ve been so busy I forgot he was skating.”  Yuuri dropped onto the sofa next to him, curling under his arm while Victor returned the call.  “Allo, Chris!  How are--”  Victor’s expression grew serious.  “Are they okay?  Alright.  I’ll tell Yuuri.  You be careful.”  Disconnecting the call, he tightened his hold on Yuuri.  “Someone attacked a skater from Spain,” he stated grimly, staring towards the fireplace.  The cold air settled around them as they continued to watch the flicker of flame in silence.


	27. Chapter 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ghosts and fight clubs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So at the moment, I have two and for now I need to make sure I can keep up with the two during my busy period. I do have another story in the wings and it will drop into place once I have time to work on it. But please enjoy this and Semicolon. I'll be posting each twice a week if at all possible but if there is a lag, please be patient. :) My crazy period ends Veterans Day.
> 
> Thanks so much to my friends and editors Magrathea and BluSkates. Your support and friendship means so much to me.

* * *

 

An unspoken tension settled between the two lovers.  Sasha still had a way of working into their thoughts, and neither of them knew where to direct their anger.  Victor blamed himself, but knew that Yuuri didn’t approve of that line of thinking, finding it harmful.  What he didn’t know was that Yuuri was struggling with similar self-deprecating thoughts.

 

Yuuri didn’t want to blame Victor.  Yuuri didn’t want to blame himself.  Yuuri wanted to understand why.

 

Why did these things keep happening to him?  Why was he targeted?  What had he done to attract these monsters into their lives?  Why couldn’t he just skate and feel safe?  Why...did the rapists pick him?  Why did Craig?  Sasha?

 

_ I wish a lawsuit could fix our problems _ , he thought as he remembered Yakov’s words.  Staring out the window of the SUV, he slipped secluded in his thoughts as Victor maneuvered through traffic.  The two teens in the back seat were absentmindedly scrolling through social media.

 

“Vitya, do we have time to get coffee?” Mila asked, leaning through the center console.

 

Yuri huffed.  “She just wants to talk to the new barista.”

 

“Oh? Is he cute?” Victor asked with a tease in his voice.

 

“Very.  He’s an art student…”

 

Yuuri dropped his phone, its clatter rattling against the console.

 

Yuri nudged at Mila who grimaced quickly.  “M-maybe I...perhaps no coffee,” Mila stammered lowering her eyes.

 

Yuuri said nothing.

 

Victor focused on driving but his speed increased noticeably.

 

Yuri looked from one person to the next before huffing.  “You and your big mouth, Mila.  If we don’t make it to the rink alive, I’m blaming you.  I’m haunting you.”  The teen hoped his joke would change the mood of the car.

 

Mila frowned.  “Do Jewish people believe in  [ ghosts ](http://www.myjewishlearning.com/article/demons-dybbuks-ghosts-golems/) ?”

 

An exasperated groan came through his lips.  “You know nothing about my people!”

 

Mila giggled, her former faux-pas forgotten.  “But I’m still your friend.  So...about ghosts.”

 

“Yes, Jewish people believe in ghosts.” Yuri spoke mocking the girl.  “Ghosts, like demons, golems, and dybbuks come from misspent life energy.  You cause me to die early...misspent life energy.”  He nodded triumphantly before turning to stare out the window.

 

Mila studied him for a moment before asking, “And a dybbuk is what?”

 

Yuri released a huff.  Yuuri in the front seat found a smile at the teens’ antics.  “I’m going to change my claim.  I’ll be the dybbuk that sticks to your soul.”

 

“You still haven’t answered my question,” Mila pointed out.

 

Yuri growled.  “It’s a soul that sticks to another.  Like for punishment or revenge.”

 

Mila frowned.  “So...possession?”

 

“Yeah, like that.”

 

“Hmmm...why would you want your soul to stick to mine?”

 

“Revenge, of course.  To torment you for eternity.”

 

Mila smirked.  “What if I, in turn, tormented you?”

 

“She’s not wrong, Yura,” Victor pointed out.  “This could backfire.”

 

Yuuri snorted, unable to contain his laughter.  And if nothing was achieved by this conversation, making Yuuri laugh was worth it.

 

* * *

  
  


Victor was skating well into the evening, and Yuri found himself looking for Yuuri.  He found him in the studio, dancing to haunting tones of  [ Rhapsody of Fire ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eWk3IJQdKnY) , very different from what Yuuri normally embodied with his movements.  The movements were...harsh, almost abusive as the music built and crescendoed.  The blonde remembered another dance, months ago, when he first got to know Yuuri and his struggle.

 

After Yuuri crashed down on the mat, Yura knew it was time to intervene.  “Come on,” he commanded as he turned off the music.  “I’m all for music that pushes the envelope but I’m not going to stand by while you hurt yourself, possibly injuring yourself before a competition.  If you want an outlet, get the keys and come on.”

 

Yuuri looked up in confusion.  “Wh-what do you have in mind?”

 

“There’s this one place I went to when I first moved into the dorms.  They...showed me how to handle myself.”

 

Yuuri looked skeptical but pushed himself up off the mat and retreated to the dressing room to change into his street clothes.  “They brought the keys he possessed, you know,” Yuuri murmured.  “It...included a set of rink keys.  He...could’ve been here.  He could have tried to grab me at any point.”

 

“You’re safe, you know.  And Victor said you fought him off.”

 

Yuuri laughed bitterly.  “Yeah, I did...until I was overwhelmed by my own thoughts.  What if I can’t keep it together when it counts?”

 

The blonde narrowed his eyes.  “Do you think it didn’t count that time?  That bastard could have seriously hurt you.  He is  _ fercockt _ ,  _ meshuganah _ .  The way I see it, you have  _ chutzpah _ .  Keep fighting, Katsudon.”

 

Yuuri raised his eyebrow at the spill of yiddish words.  Words he didn’t quite understand but could make assumptions based on context.

 

“Sorry,” Yuri muttered.  “I let my guard down with you.  It’s not like you’re going to care if I’m Jewish.”

 

“No,” Yuuri said softly.  “So...what you were saying…”

 

“He’s all fucked up and crazy,” Yuuri translated with a shrug.  “My grandpa, the one I live with when I’m not here.  He’s Jewish.  We go to synagogue and everything.  Yakov is, too, though Lilia is Russian Orthodox.  It was a real scandal when they were married.  Her parents threatened to disown her.  She told them to fuck off.”  He grinned.  “Well, maybe not those words.”

 

A ghost of a smile touched Yuuri’s lips as he stared at the blonde through the mirror.  “You said...you know a place?”

 

The blonde nodded with finality.  “ _ Da. _  Come on.”

 

Victor skated to the boards as Yuuri fished the keys out of his pocket.  “Where are you going,  _ lapochka _ ?”

 

“Yura...knows a place.  We’re going to burn off some steam.”

 

“Normally you dance or skate it off,” Victor pointed out.

 

“I-I know...but sometimes...I need something else.  Text me if you finish up before we come back.”

 

Victor nodded, glancing towards Yuri.  The green eyes held the blue with fierce intensity, refusing to give an inch.  “Alright...I’ll see you later.”

 

As they walked away, Yuri shook his head.  “I didn’t think it was possible for you to leave the old man without going all kissy face.”

 

Yuuri chuckled, scruffing his hair.  “And here I thought you were maturing.”

 

“I pick my moments,” the blonde stated.  “Grown-ups are boring.”

 

Yuuri laughed but didn’t deny the observation.  As they climbed into the SUV, Yuuri asked the blonde, “So do you still talk to Otabek?”

 

“Da, when we can.  Training and time difference makes it hard.”

 

“So...are you two…”  Yuuri trailed off, the implication hanging in the air between them.

 

Yuri snorted.  “We’re friends.  We play video games.  Not everyone is gross.”

 

Yuuri chuckled.  “I’m glad we’re friends, Yura.  You...help me to loosen up.”

 

“Good.  Someone has to...and it’s not like Mr. Extra can.”

 

Yuuri grinned, following the directions as Yuri directed him.  When they pulled in front of the cinderblock structure, Yuuri looked around uncertainly.  “Where have you brought us?”

 

“It looks rough...and maybe it is.  But these guys...they’ll have your back.”

 

“This isn’t...criminal, is it?”

 

Yuri snorted.  “ _ Da _ ...sure.  You see a few bikes outside a graffitied building and you assume there’s gangs or drugs.  Nah.  I’m telling you.  These guys are cool.  Trust me.”

 

They walked in and Yuuri quickly realized this was a gym.  Not the nice, pristine facilities they used for training.  This had a rougher atmosphere.  A fighting ring stood off to one side.  Various free weights and other training equipment filled the opposite side.  It reminded Yuuri of the bad American films in which the protagonist went to just such an establishment for some foolish reason. He didn’t think they really existed.  Yuri waved at a large man, bald head, covered in tattoos.  “Yo, Lev!  This is my friend Katsudon!  I told you about him.”

 

The man looked him over and Yuuri shifted nervously.  Punching his hand with his fist he watched Yuuri flinch.  “Never show you’re afraid,” he stated as he spat into the trashcan.  “Let me show you around.”

 

“Lev owns this club.  I knew his brother back in Moscow and we met from time to time.  When I started having problems at the dorms, I looked him up.”

 

“The Ice Tiger has spirit.  He makes a good mascot.”  The bald man messed up the blonde’s hair.

 

Yuuri found himself smiling and relaxing.  Lev took him around to the various circles introducing him to the other patrons, explaining what the different zones meant and the different fighting styles they practiced at his gym.  “What brings you here, Katsudon?”

 

“I...well, Yuri, of course.  But...I am tired of the constant attacks.  I have so much anger and I can’t let it out.”

 

“I understand that anger.  If we aren’t careful, we take it out on the ones we care most about.”

 

“That’s my biggest fear.  Vitya is very supportive...but some of my anger is towards him.”

 

“ _ Da _ .  I understand.  So...you need a valve stem release.  You should meet Boris.”  He led him over to a man that made Lev look tiny.  “Boris, this is Katsudon.”

 

The man grunted.

 

“Take him into the ring for a round,” Lev stated holding the other man’s eyes.

 

Yuuri looked startled, his eyes widening.  When they rested on Yura, the younger man narrowed his eyes thoughtfully before nodding.  Yuuri followed the man into the ring, nervous, uncertain.

 

Boris studied the Japanese man, his stature, his movements.  “You go,” he commanded.

 

Yuuri’s first swing was weak, uncertain.  The man chuckled.  “You swing like a boy.  Show me you mean it.”  Boris continued to goad him, taking the punches, dodging a few, blocking a few more.  He continued to push Yuuri but never swung or punched back…just using his words.  And the switch flipped.  

 

Yuuri swung with the ferocity of his anger and kept swinging.  _  I am not a victim.  I am not a target.  I am not weak. _  He punctuated each claim with a punch.  The big man absorbed them, inviting more, demanding he let it all out.  _  I-I refuse to lie down.  I refuse to let them take me.  I refuse to give in.  I-I won’t let them hurt me.  I won’t let them hurt my family.  My Phichit...my Vitya.  My...Vitya. _

 

He broke.  _  Vitya...so warm...so loving...wanting to believe the best about other people.  You let him in.  You...didn’t stop him.  H-he hurt me.  _  Boris reached for him as his knees gave away easing him to the floor, angry tears sliding down unrepentantly.   _ No!  He didn’t hurt me.  I. Got. Away. _  His chest heaved and released, sobs stuttering through his breaths.  He looked up at the giant.  _  I.  Survived.  Every.  Time. _

 

Boris knelt down next to the broken man.  “Men hurt you.  You shouldn’t hurt yourself, little man.  You come back.  I show you how to fight.  Lev show you how to fight.  And others.  Not like they do in fancy gyms.  We show you how to fight dirty.  How to take advantage of your situation.  Nobody will hurt you again, little man.”

 

“What if I can’t keep my head together?” Yuuri asked, looking up at the dark eyes of the giant.

 

“It’s not easy.  But, you work hard.  You dance.  You skate.  You know how to use your body.  We’ll teach you new ways to use your body.”

 

“How did you know...I skated?”  Yuuri’s anxiety spiking slightly at the suspicion that this man would know a figure skater.

 

“You come in with the Ice Tiger,” he pointed out.  Then he grinned.  “We watch you on TV.  You take a good fall.”

 

Yuuri snorted, his stereotypes were slowly being destroyed.  “That’s the first thing you learn...how to fall.”

 

“I teach you.  Come back as you can.  You’ll feel strong with time, with practice.”

 

“Thank you, Boris.”  Yuuri bowed and then offered him a smile.

 

As they walked out of the gym, Yuuri checked messages.  “Victor and Mila went home with Yakov.  He said to come straight home.”

 

“Oh...he’s probably freaking out.”

 

* * *

  
  


Yuuri walked into the little house after watching Yuri slump off to the big house muttering about homework.  Victor looked up as he walked in the door.  “Are you okay?”

 

“Yeah.  Better.  Yura...has interesting friends.  They surprise you once you get past your own prejudices.”

 

Victor frowned.  “So where did you go?”

 

“To a gym...of sorts?  They fight there.  I was working through some of my emotions.  And...it was good.  I plan to go back.  You should come with me sometime.”

 

Victor frowned.  “You weren’t injured, were you?”

 

Yuuri snorted.  “No...apparently they are fans.  Possibly due to their friendship with Yura.  They just let me work off my...anger.”  He watched Victor wince as the word fell off of his tongue.

 

Victor was quiet the rest of the night, answering in monosyllables.  Yuuri brought him a plate with his dinner and a glass of wine.  Victor grunted his thanks.  His eyes kept diverting, he continued to withdraw.  As Yuuri cleaned up, Victor disappeared.

 

Yuuri found him upstairs in bed, curled up and facing away from the door.  His shoulders shook and Yuuri knew he was crying.  He moved across the bed, sliding his hand over Victor’s back.  “Vitya…” he murmured in concern.

 

Victor hiccuped before slowly turning to face the ceiling.  “I fucked up.  I don’t know how I could have let someone like that get so close to you.  And even when I saw things going wrong, I didn’t want to admit it.  I didn’t want to admit that I put you in danger.  I’m so sorry, Yuuri.  I’m so so sorry.”

 

Yuuri reached a hand out and brushed away the tears with his thumb.  “I’m also sorry, Vitya.  There were many little things I didn’t communicate to you fully.  I...didn’t want to hurt you.  I didn’t want to interfere with your friendship.  And...we weren’t hearing each other.  We weren’t listening.  We ignored so much.  And...I was stubborn.  So very stubborn.  How many times did you ask me to let you change those locks?”

 

“He had keys.”

 

“We know that now...and I wonder how many times he came into our apartment without us knowing.”

 

Victor nodded.  “He had the keys to the rink.  That day...I found the keys on the floor.  Your keys...Yuuri, he must have taken them.”

 

“I don’t even...remember that.”

 

“I brought them into the room, laid them on the dresser.  I can’t remember what else happened but you were having an off day.”

 

“He could have made a copy of the apartment keys from his own.”

 

“Yes...but you said he got into the bedroom.  And...he had everything.  Yuuri...he could have taken you away from me in from so many places.”  Victor broke down once again, curling into Yuuri’s arms.  “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he sobbed.

 

Yuuri held onto him as he released his tears, some of his own answering Victor’s.  His lover needed to release his anger, though.  And Yuuri didn’t know how to get him out of his head long enough to get the help needed.  They fell asleep clinging to one another, raw with emotions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes we have to find release. What are your thoughts?


	28. Chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fighting shadows.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all of your support. When it's hard to continue, I think of all of you.
> 
> And thanks so much for my beautiful friends and writing partners BluSkates and Magrathea. Always a joy to work with and you shore me up when I falter.

* * *

 

****

NOTE TO READERS:  I promote tolerance in my stories even as I deal with difficult topics.  After having deal with some questionable comments I have elected to turn on the comment moderation function,  **not** because I don’t want to hear from my readers, but because I feel it appropriate and responsible to moderate comments that suggest any form of intolerance.  The world I built is not ideal.  However, I put a lot of work in it.  I hope that at least some of us can appreciate that.

Also, some were confused by the idea of Yuri Plisetsky (and Yakov Feltsman) being Jewish.  Yet in my mind, that was something addressed, albeit indirectly, in the original text.  However, like me, he doesn’t wear his cultural identity on his sleeve.  I’m my own brand of Christianity and Choctaw.  While these are both a part of my identity, neither come out in my everyday life.  Trust me.  I’ve been  _ witnessed _ to by a number of locals worried for my soul.  ;)  However, with certain people and in certain moments, I feel comfortable enough to let it come out.  This experience was then, biographically, written into the fic in which Yuri Plisetsky is able to be himself around Yuuri Katsuki, a friend he knew wouldn’t judge.

Now, about what happened in France, I knew Rostelecom was just around the corner.  They are in the intense preparations for the next fight for the gold.  You are about to see some more of the effects the stress of the last week or so of events are taking on him.  And I think the next chapter takes us to Moscow.

* * *

****  
  


Rostelecom Cup was coming up and they would travel in three days.  Yuuri and Victor were at the rink putting in last-minute practice.  Victor had been holding him close, keeping him in sight since Sasha, and Yuuri only managed to break free if he was with someone else.  Except for hanging out with Yuri, the Japanese man found himself in Victor’s presence.  When Victor released him from the ice, Yuuri retreated to the dance studio with relief, needing some quiet time.  He understood Victor’s desire to keep him close but Yuuri needed to shake off his own emotions.  With no students, he could lose himself for a time into the music, give himself time to process his pain.

Yuuri changed into his dance clothes but his choices of late covered more and more of his body, forming a shell around himself.  Rather than tights and a tank, he found himself donning a pair of loose fitting sweats that would settle it a little lower on Yuuri’s hips than he normally wore.  He tightened the string so that it rode higher.  Pulling on his tanktop, he smirked at the words  _ looks like a beauty, dances like a beast  _ scrolled across it.  A gift from Victor, of course.  He still felt exposed and shivered.  Reaching into the bag, he pulled out the sweatshirt he had stolen from Victor the other day.  It would fit more loosely.  As he looked in the mirror, he felt much better with the coverage.

He straddled the bench and began to lace up his dance sneakers.  With both shoes in place, he laid back on the bench closing his eyes and considered what he wanted to work through.  He didn’t want to alarm Yura.  Then a sad smile touched his lips as he pulled out his phone and selected his playlist.  After stretching, he turned it onto the next song,  [ All the King’s Horses ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u1j2LoW3P14) .

_ Everything was fine...then they came.  I fell apart.  No one could reach me, I was lost, caught up in the nightmare.  But still alive.  I ran hard, I felt so alone.  But I remember...there was you, Victor.  A voice that continued to call out to me in my darkness.  A constant reaching towards me.  And you pulled me back. _

The music switched to  [ Forest Fire ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HTmohwKkLBU) .   _ What went wrong?  I’m still standing but now something is off.  I am running once more.  Hiding once more.  I don’t want to become lost in the darkness once more.  Sasha...why?  Were you always this way?  Did something change?  Part of me wants desperately to understand, needs to understand.  Part of me wants to just shut the door to you, to the pain you caused both to myself and Victor. _

_ The fact is I know nothing about you.  You are a stranger to me.  You sought to understand me through pictures and objects.  But those things are just a shadow of who I am.  What if you truly knew me?  Would you have still tried to hurt me?  What do I do now?  Forget?  Or learn.  I think...I need to know your story.  I need to know more.  But I’m afraid. _

_ And I don’t understand. _

_ Why did you pick me? _

_ Who’d want to be around me? _

_ I’m...nobody. _

_ I am not worth all of this notice. _

_ Still, there was you, Sasha. _

_ And before that Craig. _

_ The two in Sochi. _

_ My old roommate. _

_ Why do you all try to tear me apart? _

_ I am nobody. _

_ I am… _

Yuuri’s eyes snapped up with the crash of thunder, the flash of lightning, the flicker of bulbs, the darkness.  He slowly turned.  In a room full of mirrors and little light everything cast false images around him, working against his mind.  Shadows and reflections of figures echoed around the room and his own image started attacking.  Another flash and he screamed, terror taking hold of him as he felt his mind teeter through his nightmares.

* * *

****  
  


As the lights flickered, Victor kicked to the edge of the rink and had his hands on the guards by the time they settled into darkness.  He remained still while the skaters worked their way off the ice.  Emergency light flickered on near exit signs and at various intervals.  Victor went for his phone first, punching Yuuri’s contact.  It rang until it went to voicemail.  He frowned and changed to text.

**Victor/ baby are you okay**

No response.

Victor quickly removed the skates and grabbed his sneakers.  Leaving the skates abandoned, he used his phone’s flashlight to head back towards the lockers first, calling out Yuuri’s name.  Still no answer.  He stilled, frowning.  Where did Yuuri say he was going?

The studio.

Victor found the stairs in the weak light and ran up, two at a time, calling Yuuri’s name out.  Reaching the door, he peaked inside.  Yuuri’s bag caught his eye.  “Yuuri!” he called out then stilled, listening.

A whimper broke through the silence.

He followed the sound until he reached the dressing room to the studio.  “Yuuri?” he called once more, his voice softer.  He heard a sniff.  He moved closer to the sound and knelt down.  Beneath the counter, he found Yuuri, his arms wrapped around his knees, his eyes tightly closed.  “Yuuri, baby, it’s me.  I’m here.”

Yuuri whined and drew back as Victor reached for him.  Victor dropped his hands.  “I won’t touch you, Yuuri.  Not if you don’t want me to.”  He waited for his words to register.  The whine dropped to a soft whimper.  Speaking softly Victor started again.  “We keep finding ourselves here, you and I on either side of this barrier.  I’ll keep coming for you, though.  I’ll always find you when you’re lost, just as I know you’d never leave me in the darkness.”  Yuuri remained still, but his whimpers quietened.  “Yuuri?  Do you know where you are?”  Victor could see movement in the shadows.  Yuuri’s hand clutched  his phone, one ear piece dangling and Victor could hear Ruelle’s  [ Monsters  ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nLdrPK0fq3I) playing just loud enough from free ear phone.  “Is that what you think?  There are monsters?”

Yuuri’s lips parted, uncertain.

“I’m not a monster,” Victor murmured.  “I am your boyfriend, your lover.  You know me.  I will never hurt you.”  The soft voice seemed to loosen the rigidity in Yuuri’s muscles.  He relaxed his hold on his knees, listening.  “I’ve always come for you.  Do you remember?”

Yuuri slowly nodded.

“Will you come to me?”

Yuuri hesitated, his eyes darting around the room.

“It’s just me.  Come home.  Come to me, Yuuri.  Let me take care of you.”

Then Yuuri unfolded and was in his arms.

“There you go.  I’ve got you, love.  I’ve got you.”  Victor wrapped him up tightly in his embrace rocking Yuuri back and forth.  They remained until Yuuri could speak once more.

“I was dancing,” he whispered.

Victor nodded, listening.

“Then...it was as if I was in the nightmare once again.”

“The storm...the power outage,” Victor murmured.

Yuuri nodded.  “I think...I need to go through it again.”  Victor narrowed his brows uncomprehending.  Yuuri added, “EMDR...I think, like a relapse?  Too much.  Need to deal with triggers.”

“I think we at least need to talk to Dr. Abramovich.  Let me call tomorrow morning and see if he can get you in before we go to Moscow.”

Yuuri nodded, resting his head against Victor’s shoulder.  “I’m scared, Vitya.  I hate being scared.  It feels...like everything’s out of my control.”

“I know, Yuuri.  I’m here for you.”

Yuuri lay still in his arms as they listened to the storm.

* * *

****  
  
  


Dr. Abramovich met with his patient.  “You had spaced your appointments so distantly from each other, I wondered if I’d see you again.”

“I’m sorry,” Yuuri responded, tugging his sleeve, worrying the cuff.

The old psychiatrist made note of his actions as much as his words.  “That was not a judgment, just an observation.  So tell me what’s brought you here today.”

“I...was attacked…”

Yuuri’s voice stilled and the doctor waited for him to move forward.

“...his name was Sasha.  He was once a friend of Vitya’s.  He...you’ve heard us talk about him.”

“The one that fixated on you,” Dr. Abramovich supplied.

Yuuri nodded.  He rubbed his nose with his finger before tugging at his hair then finally resting his hand on his forearm while the other arm lay straight at his side in a half arms crossed pose.  The straight arm ended with a fisted hand.  The old man scribbled notes.  Yuuri finally spoke once more.  “He had finally moved out.  We were...moving forward.  But, he...had keys.  He broke in.  He tried to take me.”

The doctor let the words settle around the room.  Watching Yuuri’s posture to see if he would relax, but there was no relief in the revelation.  Yuuri remained...clenched in his fury.  Abramovich thought to help the man shift gears, “But he didn’t.”

“N-no.  I fought him off.  He followed me into the bedroom.  The dogs guarded me but I got all confused.  I couldn’t tell what was real and what was...it was like I was back in Sochi.”

“How has this affected you?”

“Fights with Victor.  Angry.  My friend took me to a place to fight it off.  It seemed to help.  But...I have new triggers.  The storm, power outage...these things happened the night h-he came.”

“Are you still in the same place?”

“Like where I live?  Oh nonono.” The doctor noted that Yuuri’s body was beginning to relax, only slightly, but the speech was improving.  “We are staying in a house on Madame Lilia’s estate.  It’s different.  I feel better there but...I don’t want to be angry.  I don’t want to be afraid.  Not of shadows.”

Dr. Abramovich talked to him about his treatment options once more and Yuuri told him he wanted to continue with EMDR if it still worked.  Looking at Yuuri’s schedule, they set up the next four appointments.  “Don’t lose hope, Yuuri.  You’ve come through before.  There’s no reason to believe you won’t once more.”

“It feels like I’m always fighting.  I’m just...so tired of fighting.  I just want to live my life.  And they’re still out there, Doctor.  They attacked someone in Canada and now France.  Sometimes I don’t think it’ll ever be over.”

“It’s difficult to constantly live in a state of fear.  It makes us hyperaware.  We are always looking for the next thing that will happen.  We can live defensively, or we can choose to be proactive.”

“The place my friend took me...it looks rough but the people inside took care of me and let me work off my anger.  Like a gym.  Lot’s of graffiti.  I wasn’t sure at first.  But...they helped me work through some of my anger.”

The old doctor furrowed his brow for a moment then his face brightened, chuckling after a moment.  “Lev’s place?”

Yuuri’s eyes widened and he nodded.

“Lev is a counselor.  He did his internship with me.  He has some interesting associates.  There’s a huge bear of a man.”

“Boris,” Yuuri supplied.

Abramovich grinned.  “Yeah, that’d be him.  He’s a social worker.  Both are involved with a neighborhood youth program trying to get children and teens off the streets, into shelters and eventually homes.  I’ve helped him with some of his tougher cases.”

Yuuri’s eyes were darting around in front of him as he processed this information.

Abramovich placed his hand over Yuuri’s.  “Sometimes, it’s good to have our preconceived notions knocked aside. Yes?”  He watched Yuuri blush, then smile.  “This a good place for you to go.  You can let off steam.  I still want to see you as we’ve planned and we’ll reevaluate after the next four appointments.  However, this will allow you to work towards being more proactive.”

“Is it wrong to want to fight?”

“Honestly, it’s the most healthy response you’ve had.  Your constant refusal to be a victim in all of this is what gives you the strength to move forward.”

“Then...I’ll continue.  Thank you, Doctor.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, are we ready for the next competition?


	29. Chapter 29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rostelecom Cup and Yuri sees his grandfather. Both Yu(u)ri’s short programs are well received by the audience.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, all! It feels like it's been ages although I'm on schedule. Life is crazy next week so if the schedule is off, so be it. 
> 
> Thanks so much for your eyes and edits, BluSkates and Magrathea.
> 
> I hope you enjoy my story!

* * *

 

 

Yuri bounced around restlessly as they disembarked from the plane.  Mila rolled her eyes as she glanced back at Victor who stood behind her in the line.  Yuuri’s fingers held onto Victor’s, his nerves had kicked into gear once they woke that morning.  Victor, grateful that they had packed last night, had to talk him out of bed.  As they pulled out of the crowd, Victor watched the teens trail after Yakov and Lilia.  Pulling Yuuri into the solitude of the bathroom, he texted Yakov.

 

**Victor/ Yuuri’s having anxiety problems.**

 

**Yakov/ What do you need us to do?**

 

**Victor/ Handle the luggage.  Tell us when we have a car.**

 

**Yakov/ Someone will text when we’re ready.**

 

**Victor/ Spasibo.**

 

Victor turned to watch Yuuri wash his hands for the third time.  Cocoa whined by his feet, pawing at him to get him to turn his attention.  Victor tried, once more, to get him to relax.  “It’s going to be okay.”

 

“What if they’re here?  What if they hurt someone?”

 

“The security has been increased,” Victor attempted to reassure him, capturing his eyes in the mirror.  Victor walked closer behind the younger man, pressing his palms to Yuuri’s arms.

 

Yuuri’s eyes darted up to Victor’s reflection and he responded with a bitter laugh.  “You don’t think it was increased in France?”

 

Victor’s mouth opened but he had no answer.  “We’ll stick together.  Okay?”

 

Yuuri nodded shakily.  “Who’s competing this time?”

 

“Both you and Yura, Michele Crispino, Emil Nikola, Seung-gil Lee, and JJ Leroy.”

 

Yuuri considered these names, his eyes lowering to drop Victor’s gaze.  “I barely knew either of the other two.  I’ve competed with them before.  I-If anyone is targeted, it would be myself or Seung-gil if they keep to their type.”

 

“Yuuri…” Victor expelled, watching the shadows of doubt and worry dance across the reflection of the beautiful face.

 

“They could choose someone else, though, to throw us off.  We need to keep an eye on Yura.  I don’t really know the others.”

 

“Leroy will be surrounded by his family.  And he has a fiance following him everywhere now,” Victor stated, if he was giving into Yuuri’s analysis then he could use logic to settle the man as well.  “Michele, his sister Sara, and Emil tend to stay close together.  We’ll watch Yura.  I’ll watch you.  Yakov and Lilia will watch all of us.”

 

“Do you think I’m overreacting?” Yuuri looked back up into the blue eyes.

 

Victor frowned.  He’d like to say yes, but if he were honest with himself, “No...I wish...but no.  We still have to sort through it.  You said yourself you won’t let them take this from you.  So how are we going to deal with this?”

 

Yuuri sighed, and turned, abandoning the reflection in favor of the real.  “Okay, so...we have an idea where everyone is sorted.  What now?”

 

“Yura’s grandpa.  He’s bringing Yura to the hotel.  Let’s make sure he doesn’t just drop him off.”

 

Yuuri nodded.  “Agreed.  I-I don’t know if I could get past it if something happened to him,” he admits.  Pulling out his phone, he punched in a quick text.

 

Across the airport, the blonde pulled out his phone.

 

**Katsudon/ Make sure someone comes down to meet you before your grandpa leaves.**

 

**Yuri/ Yes, mom!**

 

**Katsudon/ Please.  This is important.**

 

**Yuri/ I’ll either text Victor or Yakov.  Okay?**

 

**Katsudon/ Yes.  Thank you.**

 

Yuri rolls his eyes and Mila peeks over his shoulder at the texts.  “He’s just worried.  There’s been some shady things happening lately.”

 

“I know,” Yuri grumbled.  “Doesn’t make it less annoying.”

 

Mila squeezed his shoulders from behind.  “Admit it.  You’re glad he cares.  Like having a big brother.”

 

“More like an overprotective mother,” the blonde groaned.

 

“Yura?  Your grandpa is here,” Yakov called.

 

He snagged his suitcase and ran to greet him, his irritation dropping completely away in his excitement.  As the old man settled him into his car, he handed him a bag.  “For later.  Pirozhkis.”

 

Yuri didn’t wait.  He pulled one out and took a bite, squeezing his shoulders together in pleasure.  “Hey, grandpa.  Have you ever made pork cutlet bowl pirozhkis?”

 

“What?  You don’t like those?”

 

“Nonono.  That’s not what I mean.  Just...an idea.”  He focused on the breaded delight in his hand as he watched his grandfather.  He loved when his events brought him to Moscow.  His grandpa was his life.  “You’re coming to see me skate, aren’t you?”

 

“ _ Da. _  I’m planning on it.”

 

A smile quirked at Yuri’s lips.

 

* * *

  
  


**Angry Kitten/ Yo!  Old man!  Katsudon says you have to meet me!**

 

**Victor/ We’re on our way!**

 

Victor and Yuuri arrived downstairs to meet with Yura and his grandfather.  “Nikolai,” Victor greeted.

 

“It’s been a while,” the elder responded.

 

“Da.  This is my Yuuri,” Victor introduced.

 

The old man chuckled deeply.  “I bet my Yuratchka likes that.”

 

“I think we’ve bonded over our shared name,” Yuuri responded affectionately, his hand ruffling through Yuri’s hair as the teen scowled.

 

“You’ll be keeping an eye on him?  I’ve seen the news.” The older man was weather beaten and looked gruff, but Yuuri could feel the affection pouring from this man.  He knew that Nikolai was a Katsuki at heart.

 

“He’ll be with either us or Yakov and Lilia,” Victor reassured him.

 

“Good,” the old man confirmed.  Turning to his grandson, he added, “You listen to them.  It’s important.  I’ll be there to see you skate so work hard.”

 

“Of course, Grandpa,” he responded.  They waited in the lobby until the old man was gone before turning to the elevator.  “Where am I staying?”

 

“I suppose that’s up to you,” Yuuri answered.  “You can room with us or Yakov and Lilia.”

 

Yuri made gagging noises.  “Old people or more old people!”

 

“Mila is rooming with Sara across the hall.  Emil and Michelle are in the next room over.  Seung-gil is at the end of the hall.  Oh, I guess you could room with JJ,” Victor suggested teasingly.

 

Yuri growls.  “I guess I’ll room with you.  Just don’t be gross.”

 

They laughed and Yuuri promised with a wink, “We’ll keep the gross factor low.”

 

Yuri frowned at that wink before turning to Victor.  “You’re rubbing off on him, and not in a good way.”

 

Victor grinned, wrapping an arm around both of the Yu(u)ris’ shoulders and guided them into the elevator.  Yuuri pushed the button and handed Yuri a keycard.  “We figured you’d prefer our room.”  The Japanese man’s expression darkened.  “If circumstances were different, I’d suggest adjoining rooms.”

 

In the room, Yuri unpacked while the other two men took turns in the shower and at the vanity.  Yuri took the shower last and returned to the room darkened and the lovers talking softly.  “I said no gross stuff.”

 

Victor snorted.  “We’re just talking.”

 

“Whatever!” the blonde groused before getting into his own bed.  He rolled his eyes when he heard the sound of kisses in the background.  Then blessed silence.

 

* * *

  
  


The practice day passed by without incident with Senior Men’s short programs the following day and Ladies’ division that evening.  Victor worked with Yakov and Lilia to manage the skaters.  Yuuri was his priority but he knew that Yuuri would continue to worry about Yura.  They arrived and began the process of getting ready.  Yuuri approached Seung-gil.

 

“How are you?”

 

The Korean offered a weak smile.  “Keep fighting.  That’s what you say, right?”

 

“You haven’t texted in a while.”

 

Seung-gil shrugged kneeling down to offer a hand to Cocoa.  “Phichit said you were dealing with some issues back home.”

 

“Only a crazy stalker,” he replied sardonically.  Cocoa ‘buffed’ as if confirming that statement.  Yuuri rolled his eyes at the dog’s antics.

 

The Korean frowned uncertainly.  “Seriously?”

 

“Unfortunately, yes.”  He held his hand out and Cocoa came to him straight away allowing his fingers to tangle in her fur.

 

“It wasn’t in the news.  Was it...was it them?”

 

Yuuri shook his head as he murmured a soft “no”.

 

“They’re still out there.  France.  Canada.  What if…”  His eyes darted around anxiously.

 

Yuuri reached another hand out to the Korean and squeezed his arm.  “I know.  If you need someone to hang out with, just call us.”

 

“I’ve stayed with my coach for the most part.  We have adjoining rooms.”

 

“If you want a break, just tell us.  We’re keeping track of the blonde Russian as well.”

 

Seung-gil glanced towards Yuri before nodding.

 

* * *

  
  


Yuri kept looking in the audience frowning.  “I don’t see Grandpa,” he complained.

 

“It’s hard to pick people out of that crowd,” Mila pointed out.  “Most of them look Russian.”

 

Yuri rolled his eyes.  Then he brightened.  “There he is!  Grandpa!”  He then jumped up and down, waving.  The old man lifted a hand and offered a wave.  “If it wasn’t for this crazy security, he could come down here.”

 

“I know you’re disappointed they turned down the request,” Lilia stated.

 

“I’m sorry,” Yuuri added, offering a self-deprecating smile.

 

Yuri grunted in exasperation.  “It’s not your fault, Katsudon.  Put the blame where it belongs.  On those assholes!”

 

“Yura!” Lilia warned.

 

“I know.  I know.  Language.”  He shook his hands in frustration.

 

“Don’t use unattractive words,” she added.

 

Yuri nodded and moved to stretch with Yuuri in the holding area.  Seung-gil joined them after a run through of his program.  Squatting down next to them, “Perhaps...I will join you for dinner this evening.  If the offer is still open.”

 

Yuuri grinned.  “It is.  Yura, you know Seung-gil, don’t you?”

 

“ _ Da _ .  We’ve met,” he grunted as he reached towards his toes.

 

The Korean offered the slightest of smiles before nodding sharply, rising, and walking away.

 

“He’s interesting,” the blonde commented sarcastically.

 

Yuuri snorted.  “This from you?”

 

“I  _ am  _ interesting.  I have a mob of angels that will fight you if you say otherwise.”

 

* * *

  
  


Yuuri listened to the announcer state that Yuuri’s program was choreographed by Victor Nikiforov and the crowd’s response.  Victor allowed himself to be distracted, waving in response before he felt the tug on his tie.  “The show has already begun,” Yuuri teased.

 

“So it has,” Victor responded, his eyes dilating at the command in Yuuri’s voice.

 

“Don’t worry about them,” Yuuri murmurs, leaning his forehead against Victor’s.  “Eyes on me.”

 

Victor nodded speechlessly and watched captivated as Yuuri skated off with a flirt in his hip, turning back to face him with teasing eyes, laughing when he spotted Cocoa standing up at the rails next to Victor watching him.  The audience were already enthralled.  He introduced his skate with a teasing tongue tracing his lips and then a kiss in Victor’s direction.  Smiling, he threw himself into his program, teasing Victor with his flirtatious dance.  A spread eagle leading into a triple axel.  He landed it clean.  Soon he launched into his quad Salchow.

 

Victor watched from the side and raised his arms in elation as he landed his jump.  He continued to cheer for Yuuri as he nailed his quad toe triple toe combination.  Even Yuri had to watch on in admiration as Yuuri finished a flawless performance, the crowd jumping to their feet as they cheered him on.  Yuuri’s face showed his elation as he skated to Victor’s arms in the kiss and cry section.  Victor dropped his forehead to Yuuri’s.  “I’m so proud of you.”

 

Yuri entered the ice as the other Yuuri waited for his scores.

**109.97**

 

Yuuri’s eyes widened and Victor reacted wildly as Yuuri took first place, even going so far as kissing Yuuri’s skates.  Yuuri rolled his eyes.  Pulling his skate away, he stood and waved towards Yuri.  “Davai!” he called, echoed by Victor.  Taking the lead from Victor, he grabbed his lover’s hand and they walked to the edge to watch the blonde start his program.

 

It was odd to see the youth push through a program that both he and Victor helped him perfect.  Hours in the studio with Yuuri.  Many more hours on the ice with Victor.  And he was beautiful.  Breathtaking.  Ethereal.

 

“I think his grandfather being here is bringing something extra out in him,” Yuuri murmured.

 

“ _ Da _ ,” Victor responded, his smile soft.

 

Yuri finished almost two points below Yuuri.  Still strong.  Victor and Yuuri met him when he came out of the kiss and cry.  Yuuri had already changed to his sneakers.  “Do you want us to walk you up to your Grandpa?” Victor offered.

 

Yuri’s eyes lit up and he responded with an enthusiastic, “ _ Da _ !”  He changed out of his skates and pulled on his Russian team jacket before sandwiching between the other two men.  They navigated the crowd and settled him in next to Nikolai, who thanked them warmly for delivering his grandson.  “You coming home to spend the night?”

 

“ _ Da _ .  I just have to be at practice tomorrow.  It’s not until one.”

 

Room was made for Victor and Yuuri and they settled in to watch JJ’s skate.  As it wrapped up, the other three skaters frowned.  Finally, Yuuri stated what they were all thinking.  “It’s good though a bit narcissistic.”  His fingers fluttered through Cocoa’s fur.

 

“He’s got a quad Lutz,” Victor observed.  The others nodded in agreement.  He had almost three and a half points on Yuuri with that program.

 

“Well, damn,” Yuri muttered.

 

* * *

  
  


After dealing with the press and fans, Victor and Yuuri saw the blonde off with his grandfather.  They then grabbed Seung-gil, Mila, Sara, Emil, and Michelle, piled into a van and headed out to the agreed upon restaurant.  “Yakov will join us.  I think he wanted to talk to some of the coaches about France,” Victor stated quietly.

 

“What actually happened?” Emil asked.

 

“We received a call from Chris.  The skater Montoya was cornered and sprayed with the same drug th-they used on me,” Yuuri answered, his voice getting quieter as he finished, his hands tightening on the seat on either side of his legs.  Victor’s hand began making circles on his back.  Cocoa was alert between his legs and began working on pulling his attention back.  Yuuri felt his breathing quicken as his eyes became unfocused.  It took him an unknown period of time to realize that Victor was talking to him, trying to get him to respond.  Coming back to the present, he realized his breathing was erratic.  He blinked rapidly.   Glancing around, Yuuri ducked down shyly and apologized.  “S-sorry.  Sometimes it...is too real.”

 

Seung-gil reached out a hand and squeezed his.  “It’s okay.  I’m amazed that you skate like you do after going through that.”

 

Yuuri smiled weakly.  “Some days...it’s harder.  I just have to keep reminding myself that I refuse to let them take anything from me.  I-I still get scared.”

 

Michele studied his sister thoughtfully.  “They’ve only gone after male skaters, haven’t they?”

 

Victor nodded watching Michele’s face relax with the reassurance.  “But these are people we’ve skated with...and they’ve moved beyond the local skates.”

 

“My friend...he...never truly recovered,” Seung-gil said quietly.  “They bronzed his skates and put them on display at the rink, a memorial plaque beneath them.  I...have to take a different entrance.  Seeing them there is a constant reminder of what he went through...and how he left us behind.”

 

“So...it was truly a suicide,” Yuuri murmured.

 

“Yes.  I didn’t want to accept it but yeah, that’s the final decision.”  Several hands reached out to the Korean and offered comforting squeezes.  “For a long time, I didn’t make time for others because I was so focused on skating.  I...looked at relationships based on calculated benefits.  Everything was part of the algorithm.  But...I forgot that I’m the other half of the equation.  I...don’t know how to be a good friend.  But I’m learning.”

 

“I am sure your friend thought that you were a good friend,” Sara’s voice reassured him, her violet eyes brimming with emotion.

 

“It wasn’t enough,” Seung-gil stated.

 

Silence filled the darkened cab as everyone considered his words.  It was Yuuri that broke the silence.  “You can’t take that on your shoulders, Seung-gil.  His pain may have been too great for anyone to cut through.  But you were there.  You listened.  And at some level, you mattered.”

 

“Perhaps,” he whispered.

 

They were subdued as they entered the restaurant.  The Russians guided them through food decisions and slowly they loosened up and started laughing, enjoying the company of friends.  The coaches were nearby having their own discussions about how to keep their skaters safe.  The dinner broke up with coaches gathering their skaters close and taking them back in smaller units.  The only one missed was JJ, but Yakov made a point to stop by and talk with his parents/coaches.

 

* * *

  
  


“So, no Yura tonight,” Victor teased, his fingers sliding down Yuuri’s side.

 

“I feel like we’re parents whose kid went to a sleepover,” Yuuri replied, leaning in to take Victor’s lips into a kiss.

 

“We should take advantage of it.”

 

Yuuri chuckled stretching.  “Yes, but like those parents...I’m just looking forward to a good night’s sleep.”

 

Victor laughed softly in return.  “Very well, my Yuuri.  I suppose you’ve earned a good night’s sleep.”

 

Changing to soft pajamas, Victor wrapped his lover into his arms.  “You were beautiful,” he whispered next to Yuuri’s ear.  He could feel Cocoa’s warmth and knew Yuuri was wrapped around the dog.

 

Yuuri sighed softly, his weariness delaying his response.  Victor thought he was asleep when Yuuri finally answered, “So was Yuri.”

 

Victor smiled, giving Yuuri a squeeze.  He was proud of the boy as well.  When did they become this...somehow they were no longer just a couple, but a family.


	30. Chapter 30

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri makes a Freudian slip during a press conference.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here goes....

* * *

 

 

As they entered the arena before the freeskate, they were surrounded by reporters spouting question after question.

 

“Mr. Katsuki, you are currently sitting in second place.  How do you feel about your standing?”

 

Yuuri pushed back his glasses thoughtfully.  “I...ummm...I wouldn’t want to underestimate the skill of my opponents.”

 

“Mr. Katsuki, will you continue to work with Victor Nikiforov in the coming seasons?”

 

Yuuri fidgeted, feeling his anxiety kick up and his thoughts clouding.  “Well, we are living with each other.  Practically married, really.”

 

“Practically married, are the two of you engaged?”

 

Yuuri’s mouth fell open.  It was Victor that swooped in slipping his arms around Yuuri’s waist.  “We’ve discussed our future together on several occasions.  However, currently we are not officially engaged.”  He tilted his cheek against Yuuri’s temple, before adding, “Yet.”

 

This created an explosion of questions but Victor waved them off with a charming smile.  “I need to get my skater inside.  I’m sure we’ll talk more later.”  Victor guided Yuuri inside.  “Are you okay?”

 

“I can’t believe I said that,” he exclaimed covering his face.

 

Victor chuckled as he pulled those hands away.  “Well, we are...practically married, that is.  I think we both know that’s where this is headed.”  When Yuuri remained still Victor reached out and tilted up his chin.  “You do want that, don’t you?  To be married?  To me?”

 

Yuuri released a breath he didn’t know he was holding.  “More than anything,” he breathed.

 

Victor gathered him into his arms.  “Then let’s make it official.  We...are engaged.  For all intents and purposes.”

 

“We don’t even have rings!”

 

“We’ll pick something out together.  Okay?”

 

Yuuri smiled and nodded.  Wrapping his arms around Victor’s waist, he buried his head into his...fiance’s chest.  “I love you, Vitya.”

 

Victor smiled as he tightened his arms around him.  “And I love you...more than life itself.”

 

* * *

  
  


Again, Yuuri and Yuri found themselves skating in the second half of the competition.  Emil and Michele both had strong free skate scores but Seung-gil’s score dropped.  When Yuuri found him after his skate, the Korean shrugged.  “I tried.  Too much happened.  I’m still gearing up for the Olympics, though.”

 

“You’ll come through this.”

 

“It seems wrong.  You reassuring me.”

 

“Make me fight for it at Four Continents,” Yuuri encouraged.  He saw a glimpse of the Korean’s smile.

 

“I will.  Good luck.”  Seung-gil went up to watch the other skaters skate.

 

Yuuri continued to warm up and stretch until it was time to get ready.  Yuri was on the ice first.  As Yuuri leaned back against Victor, he murmured, “I’d really like to see him skate a program that captured his spunk.”

 

“He’s good, though.  He found his agape.”

 

“Yes.  Even though he protested that it wasn’t him.”

 

“He just had to figure out how to interpret it.  Emotions are hard for him.  He’s used to hiding behind a mask of an angry hissing kitten.”

 

They focused on the blonde tiger and his first jump was high, eliciting a whistle of appreciation from Mila as he landed the quad.  He moved into position for a triple axel, landing it perfectly  before calmly pushing through his step sequence.  The fire of his costume seemed to ignite through the second half as he continued with four more jumps wrapping up with a quad salchow combination.  It was perfect.  Delivered with excellence as Yuri fell to his knees in exhaustion.

 

“He pushed himself hard,” Yuuri murmured.

 

Victor nodded.  “He moved his jumps.  I heard him arguing with Yakov about it earlier.”

 

Yuuri snorted.  “I guess you and I aren’t the only stubborn skaters.”  Victor grinned in response.  Yuuri tipped up and kissed his cheek before handing off Cocoa’s lead.  “Watch over him, girl,” he murmured as he knelt down and fluffed his fingers through her fur.  She barked in response.

 

Yuri finished taking his bows and passed Yuuri as he left the ice, holding the brown eyes with his fierce green ones.  Yuuri’s lip twitched.   _ This  _ was Yuri...strong, fighting, relentless.

 

Skating a circle around the ring as he finished his warm up lap, Yuuri stopped before Victor, dropping their foreheads together.  “Show them how beautiful you are, my Yuuri,” Victor murmured.

 

Yuuri ran his fingers over Victor’s cheek.  He nodded then smirked when he heard Yuri cry out in triumph at the posting of his personal best score.  Turning back towards the blonde, he heard the word “davai” called out from his direction.  Yuuri breathed out a calming breath then kicked back on the ice, turning to move into position.

 

The opening notes of his music worked its magic, and soon he was set apart from the audience.  It was just Yuuri and the ice.  Telling a story.  And this one was personal.   _ So many times I pulled into myself, fighting the world alone.  I had family that supported me.  I had excellent coaches.  Friends that stood up for me.  It wasn’t until you, though, that I opened my eyes and appreciated what was before me.  It took me breaking.  And breaking hard.  Hitting rock bottom as I crashed at the Grand Prix, then they came, they tried to break me further, tried to take everything from me.  _  The music broke into soft, singular notes.   _ But...I had already found you.  And you came to my side.  And you...never left me.  You, my idol, my friend, my lover, and now my fiance.  How is it that you saw past all of the scar tissue, past all of the insecurity, past all of the walls I put up to see me, to see the heart beating inside me?  It is you that helps me to continue fighting.  You inspired me from the beginning.  You continue to inspire me and help me to find my own strength.  _  He finished reaching towards Victor, his inspiration, his love.

 

The response was overwhelming.  No, his skating wasn’t perfect, like Yuri’s.  He touched the ice, once.  But his story seemed to captivate everyone.  Many fans knew his story.  They knew his struggle.  They watched him fall over and over again as he fought to find his feet on the ice, determined to push forward, to reach to the podium even if he had to do it on his hands in knees.   Most of those also saw his press conference where he told what happened to him.  And now they saw his determination.

 

He didn’t realize he was crying until Victor wiped away his tears, handing him his guards, guiding him to the kiss and cry.  He scored 188.65, bringing his final score just beneath Yuri Plisetsky at 298.62.  He was securely in second and would definitely advance to the final.  Only one skater left.

 

* * *

 

Yuri seethed but covered it well.  JJ took the top podium leaving Yuri with a silver and the other Yuuri with a bronze.  As they left, Yuri and Yuuri went to the dressing room together.  Their costumes stowed away and taken by a courier back to the hotel, they reentered the throng.  Yuri was still complaining about JJ when he noticed Yuuri wasn’t beside him anymore.  Turning, he could see Yuuri standing stock still, his face pale.  Cocoa went into guard stance and people backed away.

 

“Katsudon?” Yuri said, snapping his fingers in front of him.  “Yuuri?”  The other man didn’t react.  Yuri pulled out his phone and called Victor.  “Something’s wrong with Katsudon.”

 

“Where are you?” Victor asked.

 

“Next to the bleachers coming out from the dressing...shit!  He just took off!”

 

“I’m on my way!”

 

Victor found Yuri standing near an entrance to a quiet hallway.  “This isn’t safe,” he stated to the teen.

 

“I know this.  But I figured it wasn’t safe for him, either.  Especially since they seem to like him  more than the others.”

 

Victor grunted begrudgingly.  “Where is he?”

 

“He locked himself in that closet,” Yuri pointed to the door just down the hall.

 

Victor nodded.  He’s done that before.  Knocking on the door, he called out to Yuuri.  “Yuuri, love, it’s me...Victor.  Will you open the door for me?”

 

There was a hesitation, then the door slowly opened up.  Yuuri looked shaken, afraid, as he fell back down, drawing his knees to his chest.  He didn’t say anything, just let Victor inside.

 

Victor sat across from him, leaning against the wall.  Yuri glanced around then decided to sit just inside the door stretching out against the door facing.  Victor smiled appreciatively towards the blonde.  He preferred that he stayed close.

 

“Yuuri, why are we here?”

 

“I-I...th-they are here.  I could...they have...a smell.”

 

“You saw them?”

 

Yuuri shook his head.  “Just smelled them.  Their cologne.  Mixed with sweat.  Dirty.  Covering up with cologne.”

 

“This isn’t good, Yuuri.  You can’t hide like this.  It makes you more vulnerable.”

 

Yuuri assessed the situation, his eyes darting around the room then resting on Yuri.  He threw his hands over his mouth.  “I left you!  By yourself!”

 

“It’s o-” Yuri started to say but Victor darted him a warning glance shutting him down.  He dropped his eyes to his hands.

 

“We need to work on some better strategies.  Do you think you can leave the closet?”

 

“I think...maybe?” Yuuri conceded, unlocking his body and slowly rising.  Victor took his hand and Yuri came to his other side.

 

* * *

  
  


They waited outside for Yuri’s grandfather to drive up with his car.  Yuri looked back uncertainly before he crawled inside.  Yuuri insisted, wanting him to spend time with his grandfather.  The blonde knew that Katsuki would be upset if he didn’t go, and he knew Yuuri would blame himself as the reason.  After Yuri left, Victor hailed a cab and guided Yuuri into the back seat.  After giving directions, he texted Yakov to tell him Yuri was safe and in the hands of his grandfather.  Then he slipped an arm around Yuuri as the younger man stared out the window, his mind a million miles away.

 

In their room, he curled Yuuri up into his arms.  It seemed the evening was floating in and out of Yuuri’s attention.  He would be present, talking to Victor about what happened, about the smells, and then he’d be gone, locked within himself.  Victor knew where he was.  Sochi.  It still haunted him.

 

They thought it had been put to rest, but all of the events with Sasha brought it to the forefront.  All of the new attacks on fellow skaters made Yuuri more vigilant, more aware of people around him, more prone to panic.  He held a now sleeping Yuuri with Cocoa pressed in at his back, he worried about his fiance.

 

* * *

  
  


Yuri didn’t arrive back at the room until close to check out.  He was surprised to find his bags already packed and Victor scruffed his hair.  “I didn’t mind.  It’s been...a quiet morning.”  He nodded towards the Japanese man who sat staring out the window.

 

“Is he any better?” Yuri asked, worry on the edge of his voice.

 

Victor frowned considering.  “Only sometimes for today.  He will be, though.  He just has to work through this.  I’ve already called Dr. Abramovich.”

 

“When he went still, Cocoa automatically started guarding him.” Victor heard the confusion in the little voice.  When Yuri wasn’t guarding himself his youth was very obvious.

 

“There is a sign Yuuri can use that will put her in guard mode.  It’s basic and Yuuri can usually get it out if he can’t get the words out.”

 

“That’s good.  I was...not sure what to do.  I didn’t want to lose him when he took off.”

 

“I know.  I’m not sure there was a good choice in this.  I’m just glad nobody was hurt.”

 

“Do you think...they were there?”

 

“I don’t know.” Yuri heard the age in Victor’s voice.  He bit back the quip, leaving him to focus on Yuuri.

 

They left the room and fell in line to check out.  Soon Yakov, Lilia, and Mila joined them.  “Are you doing better, Yuuri?” Lilia asked, studying his expression.

 

Yuuri smiled weakly squeezing Victor’s hand.  Victor looked down with a worried smile.  “He’s struggling this morning.  Words have been coming and going.”

 

“We’ll get you home and things will be better,” she suggested.

 

Yakov took over checking out the team and soon they were herded into a van headed to the airport.  As they sat in traffic, Yuri pulled out a bag.  “I didn’t know what to do, so last night Grandpa and I made piroshki.”  He offered one of the buns to Yuuri.  Yuuri studied it before taking a bite.  His face lit up.  “It’s good, isn’t it?” Yuri asked with a grin.

 

Yuuri nodded.  His face took on that focus it would have when he was having to force out words.  “I-it’s katsudon.”

 

“ _ Da _ !  I thought...maybe it would make you feel better.”

 

“Y-yes.  Thank you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...were they there? Or is this just a case of PTSD trigger?
> 
> Thanks so much to BluSkates and Magrathea for the edits!


	31. Chapter 31

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They return home and Yuuri is still struggling. Then Phichit reveals some startling information.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to post something before I get caught up with crazy week. So I'm ignoring my posting schedule for this week. If something else gets posted after today, then consider it a bonus. The craziness will persist through friday then I've got to pick up the shreds of the week and prepare for the next. However, next week should be back to normal. So I'm posting today that I might have time to field comments. Thank you all so much for reading and look for things going back to normal next week.
> 
> Thanks so much for the love and care my friends and editors BluSkates and Magrathea give to this work.

* * *

 

Back in St. Petersburg, Yuuri withdrew into the bedroom while Victor sorted through their laundry.  He could feel Victor’s eyes follow him out of the room, an unanswered invitation to stay, to talk.  Still, his feet climbed the stairs, each step feeling heavier than the last, as if a weight was on him.  He settled into the middle of the bed and stared out the window.  In his emotional isolation he didn’t know Victor had come into the room until he felt something soft and warm wrap around his shoulders.  Yuuri looked up to meet those clear blue eyes.

 

“I can’t break free of it.  The smell is pervasive, like it’s invaded my senses.  I can’t even place it.”

 

“Perhaps we can break down the scent notes.  The firm that created our scents will likely have it on catalog.  They could perhaps help us identify it.”

 

Yuuri considered this possibility before asking, “Would they have cheap scents?  It smelled...like cheap men’s aftershave.  But not something I’m familiar with.”

 

“Perhaps it’s a Russian brand,” Victor suggested.   “There are quite a few cheap brands.”

 

“That would make sense,” Yuuri frowned.  “It was citrus.  And something aromatic.”  Yuuri sighed.  “But if it’s common, would it even matter?”

 

“We’ve got an appointment with Abramovich tomorrow.  I wanted to get you there before we hit the rink.”  Yuuri leaned into his arms and Victor wrapped him up.  Brushing his lips through the other man’s hair, Victor rested his head on top of Yuuri’s and watched the sun set over the big house outside their window.  “Do you want to go up the hill or stay home?”

 

“Home.  I’m tired of too many people.”

 

“Then we’ll stay home.  I’m going to pop over and dig through their pantry until we can go to the store tomorrow.  Shall I call the dogs up?”

 

“That’s exactly what I need.”

 

Victor slipped from his side and leaned out the door.  With a sharp whistle, he heard the tap of claws on the floor as they raced up the stairs.  They both healed at his feet until he told them, “Go get Yuuri!”  Then they both bounded onto the bed and bowled him over, Yuuri’s giggles coming through the pile of fur.  Content that his love was well cared for, he disappeared downstairs.

 

Victor returned to find Yuuri back downstairs flipping through the television and frowning.  Anger radiated off of him.  “What’s wrong?” he asked, furrowing his brow.

 

Yuuri looked up, his lips pursed and then tossed him his phone.  Victor quickly tapped in the code and read through the series of text messages back and forth from Phichit.  

 

**Peach/ I don’t know what to do about him.**

 

**Yuuri/ About who?**

 

**Peach/ Chris.  He’s really pissed.**

 

**Yuuri/ Wait!  What?  Catch me up!**

 

**Peach/ *sighs dramatically*  Chris is mad because I didn’t tell him about the crazy messages I received.**

 

**Yuuri/ What crazy messages?**

 

**Peach/ Oh...maybe I didn’t tell you either.**

 

**Yuuri/ Did you tell anyone?**

 

**Peach/ Let me see.**

 

**Peach/ Oh.  Well damn.**

 

**Peach/ This won’t make him any happier.**

 

**Yuuri/ You told Seung-gil.**

 

**Peach/ Maybe?  It came up in conversation.**

 

**Yuuri/ I can imagine.  Hi.  How are you?  Did you know I’m getting crazy text messages?**

 

**Peach/ They aren’t text messages.  If you followed my social media more closely, you would have seen them yourself!**

 

**Yuuri/ I would need a personal assistant to keep up with your social media.**

 

**Peach/ Anyway, if it wasn’t for the other stuff, we would have just said “ha ha, that’s weird” and blocked them.**

 

**Yuuri/ WHAT DID THEY SEND YOU?**

 

**Peach/ Alright alright.  No need to yell.**

 

**Yuuri/ *tapping foot impatiently***

 

**Peach/ {img} {img} {img}**

 

**Yuuri/ These are screenshots?  You’ve got to send these to Nikolai!**

 

**Peach/ What if it’s not them?**

 

**Yuuri/ What if it is?**

 

**Peach/ You’re mad, aren’t you.**

 

**Yuuri/ Contact Nikolai!  I’m sending his contact information!**

  
  


“Those images are startling,” Victor began.

 

“Stupid Phichit thinks nothing will ever happen to him.  Well, guess what!  I thought nothing would ever happen to me either!  And then Sochi happened!  And Craig happened!  And Sasha happened!  I didn’t have warning for Sochi!  I didn’t have warning!  He’s ignoring…”  Yuuri broke down as a pair of arms wrapped around him.  

 

“Shhh...shhh...it’s okay, Yuuri.  I’ve got you.”

 

Yuuri’s whole body wept, shaking in the Russian’s arms.  Victor soothed, running his hands around the younger man’s back.  “Why can’t he understand?  I couldn’t bear it if either of you were hurt.  Promise me you’ll tell me if you receive threats.”

 

“Yuuri…”  Victor’s voice held all of the uncertainty of his heart.  He wouldn’t want to tell Yuuri.  He’d want to protect him from the worst but...Yuuri would not forgive him if he kept it to himself.

 

Yuuri leveled a gaze as if reading his thoughts.  “Promise me!”

 

“Of course, Yuuri,” he promised.  “And Yakov.  And Nikolai.  And if that’s not enough, I’d tell Chris.”

 

Yuuri tightened his arms around him and continued to cry on his shoulder.  Finally, he pushed Victor back.  With a sniff, he shoved the tears off of his cheeks.  “Call Chris.  Check on him.”

 

“Are you sure?”

 

“I’ll be okay.”  Yuuri pulled away and stood up.  “Did you bring some food?”

 

“Cook sent us dinner.  We just have to heat it up.”

 

“Oh, great!  I’ll do that.  Call Chris.”

 

Victor nodded as his eyes watched Yuuri leave the room.  Not even paying attention to what phone he held, he hit Chris’ contact.

 

“Allo, bon ami Yuuri!” Chris greeted causing Victor to blink a moment.

 

“Sorry, Chris.  It’s me.  I didn’t think about what phone I had in hand.  Phichit?”

 

“Ah, so he did tell Yuuri.  He’s such a stubborn ass sometimes!  So certain nothing will ever happen to him!”

 

“I read the text messages and saw the screenshots.  What has he told you?”

 

“I think all.”

 

Victor grunted.  “Yuuri made him contact Nikolai.”

 

“Oui..there’s something else…” Chris trailed off waiting.

 

“He...told Seung-gil.  Said it came up in casual conversation.”

 

“I see.”

 

“Chris...are you okay?”

 

The Swiss man remained quiet for a full minute before answering, “I will be.  I just...thought he would...I’m an idiot.”

 

“Chris…”

 

“It’s okay.  Really.”

 

Victor disconnected frowning.  Looking up, he saw Yuuri leaning against the door frame.  “I probably wouldn’t have said anything about Seung-gil,” the younger man murmured.

 

“I felt...I had to. He’s my friend… I’d want to know if...”

 

“I know.  Come eat with me.”

 

They sorted through the containers and soon filled up their stomachs before leaning back, sated.  Music played from speakers on the counter.  Music available in every room was one thing that both of them agreed on.  Yuuri pushed up from the chair and gathered the dishes, turning to the sink to wash them.  Victor fell in next to him.  After a moment, he noticed the sway of Yuuri’s hips as they caught the song.  Drying the last dish, he reached for Yuuri and pulled him into his arms.  “Dance with me.”

 

Yuuri’s eyes sparkled in response even as he slipped his arms around Victor’s neck.  “You lead.”

 

“My pleasure.”  He guided Yuuri into a loose waltz.  The dancer followed him with ease.  The steps were punctuated with sloppy kisses and moaning responses.  “Sweet Yuuri,” Victor murmured.  

 

One song after another and they continue to give into the music, feeling the healing music slide over them until Victor’s feet stilled realizing Yuuri was in tears.  “I’m sorry,” the younger man murmured.  “I can’t seem to stop crying.”

 

“It’s okay, Yuuri.  If you need to cry, then cry,” Victor responded, his arms tightening around the younger man.  He was never good with tears but with Yuuri, sometimes it was just a matter of letting him cry it out.

 

Yuuri sniffed and held onto him.  “I’m just so tired of all of this.  So much...and nothing gives.  I miss...home.  I wish no one knew where we were.  I hate being afraid.  Everything.  Too much.”

 

“Yuuri, I’m sorry.  I wish I could shield you from all of this.  I don’t know if I am in any way adequate.  I’d take all of this from your shoulders if I could.”

 

Yuuri stepped back and held his eyes, his back straightening, raising him to his full height.  “I wouldn’t let you.  I would never let you take this from me, Victor.  I would never prefer someone else to go through this.  I hope you understand that.”

 

“But...I don’t want you to go through this,” he returned.

 

“I know...but I am.  Just...be with me as I go through it.”

 

“Always.”

 

* * *

  
  


In the deep shadows of evening, Yuuri lay curled up in Victor’s embrace.  Kisses fluttered over his shoulders and the back of his neck as the moonlight flooded the room.  Silver fingers of light cast interesting shadows across the room as the wind slid through the air.  “Your birthday is soon,” Victor murmured as he tightened his hold.

 

“I know.  I normally do something charitable for my birthday.  It’s just...I don’t know Russia well enough to decide what to do.”

 

Victor tightened his arms.  “What have you done in the past?”

 

“My first year in Detroit, I cooked at a soup kitchen.  I’ve helped Habitat for Humanity.  One year, I was really down so I volunteered at a suicide hotline.”  Victor gaped at Yuuri and he shrugged.  “I know.  It seems like the worst place to go but helping others dig their way out of a hole seemed to help me find my way out.”

 

“So...do you have any ideas?”

 

“Maybe...but, would you come with me?”

 

“Of course.  Tell me.”

 

“Well, I learned that the place Yuri took me to blow off steam is ran by a counselor that works with street kids and a social worker that helps them to find homes.  I’d like to find out how I could help with their cause.”

 

“There’s a significant homeless population.  It’s such a big problem.”

 

“I know...but I’d rather be part of the solution.  If I do nothing, I’m part of the problem.  Will you do this with me?  Will you come to Lev’s place with me?”

 

“I suppose I can do that.  I don’t want to intrude on your refuge with Yura.”

 

Yuuri shook his head insistently.  “No, it’s not an intrusion.  It’s a good place.  I just...I want to do something positive.  There is so much negativity in my world.”

 

“Very well.  Why don’t we stop by after we visit with Abramovich and see what we can do,” he suggested.

 

Yuuri smiled, turning in his arms and pulling him down.  “I think that’s a great plan.”  He pulled Victor closer and their lips met, brushing against one another.  “I always donate my birthday if I’m not in competition.  Thanks for doing this with me.”

 

“You and Yura are so much alike.  He volunteers at the animal shelter once a month.”

 

“That’s perfect for Yura.”

 

“I agree.  I’m the one that dragged him over there the first time.  He was a sad, angry kid when he first came to us and Yakov charged me to find something to help him over the transition.”

 

“Yakov is a wise man.”

 

“Yes...he is.  Because I needed...a purpose as well.  It’s so easy to get lost in being alone.  He forced me to care about someone else.  And well, it made all the difference.”

 

“And now you take care of me,” Yuuri smiled softly up at him, his eyes warm like melted chocolate.

 

“Oh, you take care of me as much if not more than I take care of you,” Victor argued.

 

“Let’s call it even,” he agreed, winding his fingers around Victor’s neck.  “Now, are we going to keep talking or are you going to make love to me?”

 

“So greedy,” Victor teased.  Victor dove down and captured those lips once more.

 

* * *

  
  


Later that night, Victor cradled a sated, sleeping Yuuri as he stared out the window.   _ My sweet Yuuri, how I love you.  I wish I could do more to keep you safe.  I wish...I could take away all of your pain or at least shield you from further pain.  _  Victor hugged him closer, his cheek snuggling against a tuft of dark hair.  _  I couldn’t even keep you safe in my own home.  I don’t know why you still trust me.  I don’t even trust myself. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading. I'm posting a Semicolon then it will be quiet for the week. So sorry but sometimes life happens.


	32. Chapter 32

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victor reveals signs of his own stress.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I have lots of backlogged SP chapters...no Semicolons. I'll write some this weekend. But I thought you might enjoy another SP in the meantime. I'll probably pop another in on Saturday but it will be next week before you see a Semicolon.
> 
> Thank you so much, BluSkates and Magrathea! You keep me on track and help me work through my ideas along with your awesome edits!

* * *

 

 

Dr. Abramovich steepled his fingers as he listened to Yuuri describe the events at the last competition.  As Yuuri concluded his account, the old psychiatrist frowned and wrote down the information he needed.  “If you do decide to follow your partner’s advice and seek out the source of the scent, we could take you through a desensitization protocol so that the smell will not trigger you, Yuuri.”

 

“Oh,” Yuuri responded in surprise.  “It never even occurred to me.  You can do that?”

 

“ _ You _ can do that.  I merely serve as a guide in the process.  The therapy we’d use is called exposure therapy and it will help you to face it through a series of steps just as we go through a series of steps with your EMDR.”

 

“Okay.  I’ll talk further about it with Victor.  I just...I didn’t think about it along those lines.  I would like to do that.  If for no other reason than to prevent me from running.  What happened in Moscow was dangerous and potentially not only put me but Yura in danger.”

 

“We are going to work further on your PTSD responses.  Now, you stated that you called your dog into guard pose when you sensed yourself in danger.  Once you moved into a perceived safe place, did you release your dog to deal with your anxiety symptoms?”

 

“N-no?  Victor had to call her down.  Then he and Yura sat with me until I could function again.  Well...I say function.  I think I was in and out of panic for the rest of the night.”

 

“Since you self-isolated, it was probably best that you left the dog in guard mode.  Whether it was a random response or you truly encountered your rapists, we’ll never know.  However, it is always best to err on the side of caution.”

 

“Thank you.  I wasn’t certain.  And Vitya...I keep putting him through so much.  I’m really worried about him.”

 

“Let me work you through your protocols then I’m going to send you to work with a mindfulness therapist.  I want you to work on strategies to help you to assess your environment for actual versus imagined dangers.  Most of your instincts are good so I never want you to second guess yourself or to deaden that response.  This is merely an opportunity to sharpen your skills.”

 

* * *

  
  


An hour and a half had passed by before Yuuri came out of the room and greeted Victor briefly.  “Dr. Abramovich wants me to work with another therapist for a while longer.”

 

“Okay, Yuuri.  Come back here when you are finished.  I’m going...to talk to the doctor.”

 

Yuuri smiled, and nodded.  “I’m glad to hear that.”

 

Victor squeezed his hand then watched him follow the nurse to his next therapy.  He then turned to Dr. Abramovich.  “I’m...ready.”

 

“That’s good.  We’ve got much work to do.”  The old doctor lead him into his office.  As Victor took his seat, the doctor leaned forward and studied him.  “You’ve lost weight.”

 

Victor laughed bitterly.  “My coach isn’t happy about it either.  He pulled me aside in Moscow and told me I needed to get help or he was banning me from the ice.”

 

“Do you tend to lose your appetite with stress?”

 

“Yes.  And...I need to control things more.  I don’t think Yuuri’s picked up on it but I noticed that everything has to be just so before I can even begin to relax.  I’m double and triple checking locks.  Then I’m studying the locks to see if they are good enough.  They are.  I know this.  But after everything that’s happened, locks are a big deal.  I know I’m smothering Yuuri with how closely I watch over him.  I’m overprotective.  And…”  Victor drew in a ragged breath.  “...this last time...it was my fault.”

 

“Let’s focus on that first.  We are discussing Sasha,  _ da _ ?”

 

Victor nodded.  “I dated him and never noticed that he had all of these things wrong with him.  They have him in a psychiatric lockup.  He signed the agreement rather than go to trial.  How is it that I never saw it?”

 

“Sometimes people hide their psychiatric troubles well.  Consider this.  If you didn’t want people to know you were struggling, what would you do?”

 

“I put on a mask.  My smiles are fake but I know what people expect and I can play to those expectations.  Only Yuuri and Yakov...and maybe sometimes Yura...can see through them...all of them.”

 

“We all learn how to put our best foot forward.  We learn how to hide and how to play into people’s perceptions.  Now, Sasha knew what you expected to see and gave you just enough that when he slipped, you overlooked it.  The evidence was strongly in his favor.”

 

“I still feel like this was my fault.  If I had paid more attention...perhaps earlier on...maybe I could have gotten him the help he needed.  Perhaps this never would have gone this far.”

 

“Those who suffer from delusions do not seek help.  Sasha is being forced into it.”

 

“He was nineteen when we met.  I knew I wasn’t in love with him.  I just...he was nice and he settled into my life neatly.  I knew he grew up in a children’s home and that he was working to transition to life without that dependence.”

 

“Instead, he transferred his dependence on you.  And when you weren’t there?”

 

“There was another.  Alexei.  I thought...he was controlling.  But now I wonder...could that have been part of Sasha’s perception?”

 

“Possibly.  He could have had skewed views of you as well.”

 

Victor sighed.  “How do I deal with this?  I have so much anger.  With myself.  I don’t know what to do?”

 

The old man smiled encouragingly.  “That’s why you are here.  For now we are talking it out.  Then we’ll discuss strategies.”

 

They continued to work through Victor’s struggle back and forth until time was wrapping up.  Then the old psychiatrist regarded him a bit longer touching his lip with his finger thoughtfully.  “Have you talked to your partner about his new outlet?”

 

“He’s mentioned the place Yura took him to...he wants to talk to them about community service with the youth.”

 

“This would be a great outlet for you to become involved as well.  Sometimes when we are internally angry, we need a way to release that...not with violence but by replacing the bad with the good.”

 

“He asked me to help him with this.”  Victor then chuckled.  “I should have known.  He’s already figured out that I need an outlet.  He’s...oh, Yuuri.”

 

“He’s a good partner for you.”

 

“The best,” Victor murmured, a smile finding its way to his lips.

 

“So, shall I continue to see you?”

 

Victor sighed before nodding.  “I can’t be the best person for Yuuri if I don’t take care of myself.  I’m glad you suggested it when I made Yuuri’s appointment.”

 

“Well, experience has taught me that if one partner is going through traumatic struggles, the other is affected greatly.  I wanted to get you in sooner rather than later.”

 

“I...wouldn’t have come on my own.  But I always will come for Yuuri’s sake.”

 

“You are important, too.  You need to take care of yourself for your sake as well as his.”

 

“I know...but sometimes my thoughts are so focused on how to care for him that I forget about myself.”

 

“That isn’t healthy.  Perhaps we can work on this as well.”

 

Victor nodded.  “I think this is something I’ve struggled with for a while.  This tendency towards codependency.  I...am willing.  I want to be healthy.”

 

“Good.  Then I’ll place your appointment right after Yuuri’s next appointment and we’ll do as we did this visit.”

 

“Thank you.  And I’ll become involved with Yuuri’s service project.  Who knows?  Perhaps I’ll find other healthy outlets as well.”

 

* * *

  
  
  


Yuuri guided Victor through the streets to Lev’s place.  The stark exterior of the facility and the surrounding neighborhood didn’t startle Victor.  He grew up seeing the poorest of poor.  Hunger and hopelessness forced people to do what was necessary.  For those who made it out of the ghettos, they were smart to remember where they came from.  Perhaps that was what drew Victor to Sasha to start with.  There was a hunger in the teen and although Victor wasn’t much older than a teen himself, he knew he could make things better for him.  He tried.  He wasn’t enough.  _  Would anyone be enough? _

 

Sighing, he pushed that thought aside.  Yuuri would probably not appreciate such thoughts.  Victor felt a tug on his hand and smiled apologetically as Yuuri tugged him inside.  He left the cold, late November air behind him and entered the gym.  Glancing around, he spotted the free weights, the fight ring, various punching bags and mats.  Looking closer, he also spied a dance barre and beneath the mats, wood flooring in that corner.  He then knew what Yuuri had in mind.  At least for his community service.

 

“Little man!  You’ve returned!” a man greeted.

 

Yuuri smiled warmly.  “Yes.  I’m...doing better.  Thank you for letting me intrude on your space the other day and let off steam.”  The tattooed man waved him off and grinned.  “Lev, this is my partner Victor Nikiforov.”

 

Lev chuckled.  “There’s no need to introduce him.  He’s a national hero.”

 

Victor blushed.  “I just skate,” he said quietly.

 

Lev shook his head.  “I know more about what you do than you let loose in the press.  Some of our kids have benefited from your generosity.”  Catching Yuuri’s curious stare, he expanded.  “This man has made way for various kids to get off the street through skating and dancing.  He wrote letters and used his name to open doors for some that would never have gotten the chance otherwise.  It wouldn’t surprise me to learn that he opened the door for the little tiger.”

 

Victor chuckled at this.  “No, Yura is Yakov’s find.  I do keep an eye out for talent and I don’t believe a person’s socioeconomic status should keep them from an opportunity.”

 

“That’s what we like to hear around here,” Lev stated.  Turning an expectant eye towards Yuuri, “So, are you here to fight?”

 

Yuuri shook his head.  “I have something else in mind.  I make it a point to donate time on or around my birthday each year.  I’d like to offer my skills.”

 

“As a figure skater?” Lev asked with a frown of confusion.

 

“As a dance instructor.  Do you have some in your program who would benefit from a few lessons?”

 

“What are we talking?”

 

“Weekly, weather and competition dates permitting.  I’ll be in Russia through Worlds.  So at least Mid-March.”

 

“Let me ask around.  Will you work around their schooling?”

 

“Of course.  I noticed when I was here last that there is a ballet barre and I suspect a dance floor lies beneath those mats.”

 

“You’re correct.  This building has gone through several transitions.  However, it wouldn’t be a problem to reorganize the space.  Why dance?”

 

“When I struggle getting through my emotions, I find dance helps me work through them.  Therapeutic expression.  Victor has offered to assist as well.”

 

“The kids will be clamoring to meet the man himself.”  Lev chuckled at Victor’s blush.  “I hope you bring your autograph pen.”

 

“I’ll make sure of it,” Victor agreed.

 

“So when do you plan to start?” Lev asked.

 

Yuuri frowned thoughtfully considering their schedule.  “After the NHK.  I’ll be traveling with Victor as a coach stand in.  So, Tuesday?”

 

Lev grinned.  “I can work with that.  Very well, I’ll get you some kids.  It’s a small space so maybe half a dozen but I have a few in mind that might benefit from your suggestion.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

“No, thank you.  We always appreciate those who reach out to the kids in the community.”

 

Victor guided Yuuri out of the building and back to the SUV.  “Those clouds are looking heavy.  Let’s get our shopping done and head home before the snow hits.”

 

Yuuri nodded, a quiet smile on his face showing a serene mood.  Good.  The last few days have been full of mood swings.

 

* * *

  
  


Setting the groceries on the counter, they both began to unload the sacks and put things away.  Yuuri set aside the items he would use to prep supper.  Wonton wrappers, chicken broth, green onions, ginger, soy sauce, shrimp and pork loin.  He pulled the brown sugar down from the cupboard and some rice wine.  He then pulled out the cutting board to prepare the meat.  Victor stepped in to chop the onions for him.

 

“Will you grate the ginger?” Yuuri asked as he began to finely chop the meat.

 

Victor reached for the hand grater and started preparing the broth as Yuuri directed.  It was a clean  [ soup,  ](http://allrecipes.com/recipe/13199/wonton-soup/) and as Yuuri added the prepared wontons, it cooked up into something warm and savory.  As they settled across from each other at their small table, Victor tasted the soup and smiled.  “ _ Vkusno _ !  Perfect for a day such as this!”

 

Yuuri’s eyes strayed out the window as the snow began to blanket the ground around them and had to agree.  “It’s a hot chocolate kind of evening,” he murmured.  There was something safe and warm about being swaddled in one’s house by snowy drifts.

 

As Victor washed their dishes, Yuuri stepped out into the carport and grabbed an armload of wood.  Victor glanced up as he walked by.  “A fire sounds perfect.”

 

“I thought so.”  He continued on to the living room and began setting the wood into the grate and making a pile for later.  The fire was warm and crackling when Victor joined him, mugs of  [ hot chocolate ](https://www.hersheys.com/kitchens/en_us/recipes/hersheys-perfectly-chocolate-hot-cocoa.html) in hand as Yuuri had suggested.  As the younger man took a sip, he responded, “Mmmm, real milk.”

 

“Is there any other way?” Victor asked with a raised eyebrow.

 

“My first year in college, I had to settle for those powder pouches.  Dorm life!”

 

“Oh, I think I would have done without,” Victor answered, his face wide with horror.

 

Yuuri chuckled.  “Once you have the real thing, it’s hard to settle for the pouches, but I had to make a lot of concessions when I moved to the States.  I really missed my mother’s cooking.”

 

“Understandable.  But you can cook,” Victor pointed out.

 

Yuuri hummed in acknowledgment.  “It’s still not Mom’s cooking.”

 

Victor smiled thoughtfully.  “I miss her cooking as well.”

 

“I’m finding myself looking forward to March and three months in Hasetsu.”

 

“I’m considering booking direct tickets from World’s but I want to confirm with Yakov first.”

 

“Oh, please do!”

 

“Of course,” he murmured.  Victor set his cup onto the coffee table and walked over to a chest next to the wall where they stored extra blankets.  As Yuuri watched on, he spread out a plush blanket onto the floor and some pillows.  He then added a couple more blankets at the foot of the makeshift bed.  “Join me?” he invited, positioned on his knees, his arm reaching out.  Yuuri set his cup aside knowing he could not refuse that invitation.

 

Settling into the blankets, he watched Victor shift to come over him, his knee sliding between Yuuri’s legs as he leaned forward to brush their lips together.  “I hope you don’t find this too forward, but I plan to take full advantage of this fiery ambiance.”

 

Yuuri reached up and stroked his cheek.  “I’m yours.  Always.”

 

Victor leaned forward and brushed his lips over Yuuri’s once more, the younger man opening up and inviting Victor in.  His tongue teased the entrance before slipping inside.  Fingers licked up Yuuri’s side, the fabric barrier creating a tease to his touch.  Yuuri’s own hands tightened around Victor’s waist sliding up as the kiss deepened to hold him closer.  A soft moan found its way to his lips.

 

Victor finally broke free of the kiss and asked softly, “Do you mind if we rid ourselves of these clothes?”

 

“Not at all,” Yuuri grinned.  They began divesting themselves of their clothes, leaning in to help the other, teasing fingers touching skin in the process.  As Yuuri laid back, his skin exposed, the light of the fire flickering across the surface, Victor leaned forward and began to work kisses down his form, tongue tracing valleys, lips tightening around the peaks formed by his nipples.  Yuuri’s soft gasps and moans responded to his touch.

 

“My Yuuri,” Victor murmured.  “My life, my love, my partner, do you know how thankful I am we found each other?”

 

“We had such a rocky start,” Yuuri said quietly, a small shadow in lingering in his expression.

 

“That just means we’ve already had the strength of our love tested,” Victor replied.  “But I believe we would have come together no matter what.  I’m drawn to be by your side, Yuuri.”

 

Yuuri blushed beautifully beneath him.  Victor lowered his lips to capture that smile in a kiss.  Yuuri opened once again beneath him and Victor guided him back to settle him into the pillows he arranged.  Before he removed Yuuri’s glasses, he watched how the flames flickered across the lenses.  He placed them on the coffee table before returning his attention to Yuuri.  His lips began to explore Yuuri once more.  Fingers slid down to Yuuri’s hip as he felt the other man arch up towards him seeking friction.  He guided them together and as their lengths settled next to one another, he released a groan.  Yuuri chuckled even as his legs fell open further to welcome his contact.   _ God, the benefits to dating a dancer.  His flexibility! _

 

Victor’s hand slid down his length receiving a moan from his partner in reply.  He continued over his scrotum giving a gentle squeeze to announce his presence before his fingers slid across the perineum and finally settling at his entrance.  He teased the tightly budded entrance.  The previous night they only skimmed the surface, using lips and hands to satisfy one another.  Tonight, he intended to fill his partner.

 

Reaching for a pillow, he eased it under Yuuri’s hips.  A glance up towards Yuuri’s face revealed a half lidded expression of expectation, lips parted as he breathed shallow breaths.  Yuuri reached for him as he settled back between Yuuri’s legs lube in hand, pulling him in for a kiss.  As Yuuri released him, Victor settled back on his knees as he tended to the viscous fluid.  He generously rubbed the entrance with two slick fingers while leaning forward to tease Yuuri’s length with his tongue, his eyes glancing towards Yuuri’s as he heard a moan from the younger man.  Taking him in deep, he slid his finger into the younger man.  He could hear the intake of breath, the careful breathing as he relaxed his body and accepted the intrusion.  As Yuuri settled, he began slow movements in and out matched by the movements of his mouth and tongue.

 

Yuuri’s whimper with need signaled the second finger and Victor happily complied, sliding it in with the next plunge.  Coming off of Yuuri’s length with a pop, he rose up to look down in Yuuri’s face.  “So beautiful,” he murmured, his face relaxing into a look of adoration.  “My beautiful, beautiful Yuuri…”

 

“Please,” Yuuri begged reaching for him.  Victor leaned forward to kiss him even as his third finger found its way inside, swallowing down the wanton moan released by the younger man.  “W-want y-you…” he stuttered.

 

“I’m all yours,” Victor answered as he removed the fingers.  Reaching for the condom, he used his teeth to tear open the packaging before rolling it in place.  Slicking up the outer surface, he lined up and eased himself in watching Yuuri’s face contort with pleasure as his entrance stretched around Victor.

 

As he settled deep within, he watched Yuuri’s face tense with pleasure.  “You love that stretch, don’t you, love?”  All Yuuri could do was nod.  He held Yuuri in place until he started to feel the squirm.  Then he began moving within Yuuri, slowly building the layers of pleasure.  Yuuri’s cries built with it in crescendo.

 

“Please…” he cried, elongating the syllable.  Victor watched the wicked torment in his lover’s expression.  Reaching down in mercy, he began to stroke his member in time with his own thrusts.   “Vitya…” he began, dropping into a babble of Japanese too fast for him to follow.

 

Victor could feel himself losing touch.  “Yuuri, I’m gonna…”

 

“I’m close, too,” Yuuri echoed.  Victor stroked just a few more times before he felt the walls tightening, the sticky release on his fingers.  He followed with his own release, collapsing on Yuuri’s chest as the aftershocks of Yuuri’s release continued to send him through.

 

They remained in the stillness, the crackling of the fire beside them, a moment held between the two of them unshared with the rest of the world.  “I love you,” Victor finally whispered.

 

Yuuri’s arms tightened around him.  “I love you, too.”  After a moment, though, he added, “but we’re sticky as hell.”

 

Victor chuckled.  “Let me get a cloth and clean us up.  Hold still.”  He returned moments later having wiped himself down and he found Yuuri stretched out, spent, the light sending beautiful shadows over his body.  “If I could hold onto this…”

 

Yuuri shifted his head back to meet his eyes, a warm smile flickering across his lips.  “It’s yours...always.”

 

Victor was soon at his side cleaning him up before hauling him into his embrace.  Victor curled up around Yuuri, their legs tangling together as a blanket settled over them.  Soon, they were thankful for the blankets because two dogs snuggled up to them and Victor giggled when Yuuri squealed as a cold nose found his ribs.  _  This is love. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this! :) Next post I should be on the other side of my stressful week. Thank you all so much for your support!


	33. Chapter 33

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victor takes Yuuri with him to Japan as he skates in the NHK located at Nagano, Japan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm alive and I'm celebrating by posting another chapter of Lifeline. Next week, Lifeline will post on schedule. However, I'm not sure about Semicolon. I need to write some chapters but put them up once I can get it in order. I hope you enjoy this chapter!
> 
> Thanks so much for putting up with my whines and complaints this week, BluSkates and Magrathea. I'm through to the other side. And thanks so much for all of your editing genius!

* * *

 

The flight to Nagano, Japan, was almost like coming home but still far enough away that Yuuri felt the distance.  “I hate this feeling,” he admitted as he leaned into Victor’s arms in the privacy of the cab ride.  “I’m home but not.  I’ve always pushed the homesickness down by staying busy on the ice and with schoolwork.”

 

“Do you wish we hadn’t taken the offer?” Victor asked, his fingers circling Yuuri’s shoulder muscles in a gentle massage.

 

“No.  It’s not that.  I just...wish we could go home more.  But this is a good move for both of us.  When we retire, we’ll appreciate the experiences.”

 

“I agree...but always, I lean towards what makes you happiest.”

 

Yuuri frowned thoughtfully before replying, “If I came home, I’d feel happy in the short term but I’d regret giving up the opportunity.  I think we are where we need to be.”  Then the younger man shifted and smiled, “And besides, March is just around the corner.”

 

“True.  Plus we’ll be working with community kids.  I think that will make you feel better as well.”

 

“Yes.  You know, Boris is the social worker that works with Lev.  He helps place the kids in homes.”

 

Victor tightened his arms around him.  “Are you...ready for kids?”

 

“I don’t know.  I think it is something that I’ll know when it happens.”

 

“Like a connection.”

 

“Exactly.  But...I’m open to kids.  It’s just...with our careers…”

 

“If they are young enough, we’d just bring them along.  When I retire, we’re moving back home and we’ll have family.”

 

Yuuri nestled more tightly into his arms.  “Home for me is wherever you are.  But...I look forward to moving back to Hasetsu.”

 

“After the Olympics,” Victor said quietly.  “I think my body can hold out until then.”

 

“I’d like to continue volunteering with kids while we are in Russia, then.  I may change my role, but...this is something I feel I need to do.  It has nothing to do with what happened to me and it’s a place where I can do some good.”

 

“I think any good that we can do, we should,” Victor said quietly.

 

* * *

  


They did not stay with the other skaters this visit.  Victor surprised Yuuri with a booking at an [ onsen ryokan ](http://selected-ryokan.com/ryokan/kanbayashi-hotel-senjukaku_snow-monkey_yudanaka-shibu_nagano.html).  Yuuri turned to Victor as the cab drew up realizing he hadn’t been paying attention to their surroundings.  “What did you do?”

 

“I couldn’t take you home...I thought this would be the next best thing.  We’ll live in Japan for years...probably until we leave this world.  However, right now you need this.”

 

“Vitya…”  Yuuri’s hand was already moving up to wipe clean the misting eyes.

 

“It’s just...competitions have been so much.  I wanted you to have a way to break from...everything.”  Victor spread his hands for emphasis.  “And, well, it hasn’t escaped me that you’ve been homesick.”

 

Victor didn’t have time to brace himself before Yuuri flung himself into his arms and started with an “oh!” before his arms settled around the younger man.  Their luggage was unloaded and they were taken to their rooms to settle in.  Yuuri was eager to get into the onsen and soak away the travel aches and Victor was right behind him.  They elected to use the private hot spring for the evening.  They would enjoy the open air springs later.  As Yuuri settled into the tub, he welcomed the warmth of the hot springs’ embrace.  Victor moved to seat himself next to him.  “I miss this,” Victor admitted with a sigh.

 

“Mmmhmmm...very much so.  And...we’ll have our own.”

 

“Helping your family gave me an appreciation for the work that goes into keeping them operational.  Still, considering we’re going to have skaters and kids in our home, I think it would be nice to have a private bath such as this.”

 

“My parents have one.  They’ll use the public bath but, well, sometimes they want to spend time like this.”

 

“And the public baths aren’t coed.”

 

“Nope.  We had the advantage for a change being a gay couple.”

 

“So when we are in Hasetsu, I want to look through our home and decide what needs to be done.  If we can get the remodeling done in our absence, then moving back will be more of a homecoming and less of a hassle.”

 

“Dad has offered to oversee the construction once we’ve made the necessary decisions.”

 

“Good.  I appreciate them greatly.  You are lucky to have such wonderful parents...and sister.”

 

Yuuri chuckled as he rested his head on Victor’s shoulder.  “I know.”

 

Victor dipped his cheek against Yuuri’s head and they rested, breathing in the steam and allowing the hot spring to work its magic.

 

When they escaped the confines of their room, they found the [ dining ](http://www.senjukaku.com/en/)to be warm and friendly with locally raised food sources.   They enjoyed the prepared dish made with apple fed beef and organic vegetables before taking a walk in the evening air and exercising Cocoa.

 

“Not too far from here, we can see the snow monkeys,” Victor pointed out.

 

“Mmmm...not tonight,” Yuuri teased, his arm sliding around Victor’s waist.  “I don’t want to share you.”

 

Victor chuckled.  “I was thinking when we return after practice tomorrow.  We’ll have the afternoon.”

 

“That sounds nice.  As long as I can enjoy the onsen.”  Yuuri’s voice sounded luxurious and relaxed and Victor couldn’t help but smile at the tone.  Returning to their room after their walk, Victor unpacked while Yuuri changed for bed.  He knew Yuuri would crash soon but because of the time they took earlier, perhaps it would be a more restful sleep.  When he joined his partner, Yuuri was curled up, arms and legs wrapped around Cocoa.  Victor curled up behind him wrapping Yuuri up in his embrace.

  


* * *

 

The next day, as planned, they explored the [ Jigokudani Snow Monkey Park ](https://www.tripadvisor.com/Attraction_Review-g1117904-d324924-Reviews-Jigokudani_Snow_Monkey_Park-Yamanouchi_machi_Shimotakai_gun_Nagano_Prefecture_Chu.html) after practice.  Both Yuuri and Victor laughed at their antics as they walked through, hand-in-hand.  Victor enjoyed the light connection to his partner, his thumb rubbing over Yuuri’s skin, eliciting secret glances and soft smiles.  As they settled in for the evening, he realized Yuuri hadn’t tensed up once at the rink.

 

That didn’t change until they arrived to find the arena full of people.  Victor could clearly see the difference in Yuuri’s demeanor.  His hands clutched tightly on Cocoa’s lead and the therapy dog tensed at Yuuri’s hold.  Victor slid a hand up and down Yuuri’s back and pointed out the familiar faces of Otabek and Seung-gil.  This was the final competition before the Grand Prix Final and would decide the last of the participants.  They approached the other two skaters and Otabek acknowledged the two with a sharp nod.  Seung-gil greeted them.

 

“I noticed you weren’t registered at the hotel.”

 

“I booked us at an onsen ryokan.  It’s Yuuri’s birthday and I wanted to do something special,” Victor responded to the Korean.

 

“Oh, _saeng-il chugha_ ,” he responded to Yuuri.  His smile was as rare as Otabek’s but still present.

 

Otabek nodded and followed up with “ _s dnem rozhdeniya_ ” before turning back to survey the ice.

 

Yuuri answered, “ _Arigato! Spasibo!_ ”

 

Seung-gil’s expression shifted for a moment before looking at Yuuri.  “Things have been quiet.”

 

“I know,” Yuuri murmured.  Victor’s hand tightened where it rested on Yuuri’s hip.  He glanced up, his expression grim.  “Stay close to me, Vitya.”

 

“I will.  And when I skate, stay where I can see you.”

 

“My eyes will be locked on you,” he promised.

 

“We’ll all keep an eye on each other,” Otabek responded, his eyes returning from the ice with a fierce promise.  “I skate in the first three.  I can stand with him once I’m finished.”

 

“ _Spasibo_ , Otabek,” Victor responded thankfully.  The Kazakh nodded sharply in response, his intense stare holding Victor’s with resolve.

 

* * *

  


Victor reluctantly left Yuuri to skate but he knew that his partner would be upset if he didn’t.  He settled into position and waited for the first notes of [ Sparrow ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C9haTFoGcvk)to fill the arena.  Although so much of him could be described as happy, this song suited him because a part of him still wept.  He still wept for the pain and suffering Yuuri went through, was still going through, with the rape.  He still wept for the period of separation when he tried to reach Yuuri and the man that almost got to him.  And he wept bitterly for Sasha, for both the pain he put Yuuri through and the betrayal?  No.  That wasn’t right.  He wept for what Sasha could have been if he had parents who put him before their drugs and alcohol.  And as he finished his skate, he realized he wept openly, tears dripping down his cheeks, the cold air biting at the dampness.  He waved as he took a lap around the rink before finishing before Yuuri.

 

Yuuri reached for him, supported him as he put on his guards, guided him to the seating area.  Victor looked up in surprise when he realized Yuuri was blotting his tears tenderly, a tissue freed from the confines of the poodle-covered tissue box.  Then he spotted Otabek standing serenely nearby like a sentinel and Seung-gil kneeling next to Cocoa.  He’d like to share the podium with these two men this round.

 

He finished the short program in first, his emotional interpretation for once driving presentation score higher than his required elements.  The four of them decided to finish the evening by having dinner together before retiring to their own rooms.

 

As Victor settled into Yuuri’s care that night, he murmured, “I think I’m struggling more than I admit.  I don’t know how to move forward.”

 

“You are moving forward, Vitya.  It’s just that your steps are baby steps.  And what happened with Sasha has hit you hard.  Give yourself time to heal.”

 

“Do you think...it was how he was raised?  Or do you think it was already in his nature?”

 

“I’ve been doing some reading,” Yuuri confessed.  “I guess you can say I need to understand.  A lot of orphans suffer from a disorder called _attachment_.  It...reprograms their brains.  So I think it is tied to how he perceived the world.  The more I learn about his past, the more I feel...compassion.  I still hurt.  I still struggle with anger.  But...there is this other side of it.  Regardless of how I feel though, I can never reach out to him.”

 

“It’s part of the sentence.  Once released, he’s not allowed to have any contact,” Victor stated quietly.  “And it will be a while before he’s released.  We’ll likely be moved back to Japan at that point.”

 

“I just...hope he can find some relief from his own suffering.”

 

“You have a good heart, a kind heart, my Yuuri,” Victor murmured, turning to kiss him over the beating heart.  “I think I will spend a lifetime trying to be worthy of such a kind man.”

 

“Oh, Vitya, you are immeasurably kind.  Don’t sell yourself short.”

 

“I just...sometimes my thoughts are dark...what I want to do to the ones that hurt you.”

 

“Just...don’t.  Stay safe and by my side.”

 

“I will.  You come first,” Victor promised.

 

* * *

  
  


Victor skated his free skate last, embracing the combination of instruments used in this version of [ Photograph ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DpjO44jJ4Mc).  His last skate showed his sadness.  This one embraced his happiness, his love, his life with Yuuri.  He thought of their talks over the past few days.  He was filled with promises and yearnings for a future that was possible to him.  Home and family with this man.  And he wanted all of it.  He could never consider a life without Yuuri.  The younger man was so ensconced into the center of his heart that Victor needed him to breathe.  As he settled into the final step sequence and jump, Victor couldn’t help but grab hold of that thought.  His landing sound, he closed his skate reaching towards Yuuri and the promise of their life.

 

Victor waited in the kiss and cry with Yuuri, Cocoa lying next to their feet as they waited.  He already knew the results.  He smiled in acceptance as he was announced in first place.  Otabek wrapped up in second and Seung-gil third.  But Victor would advance and join both Yu(u)ris, JJ, Phichit, and Chris.

 

Seung-gil wished him luck then went to Yuuri.  “I already planned to attend the final in Barcelona.  I’ll be there to cheer you and Phichit on if you need anything.”

 

Yuuri hugged him and smiled warmly.  “Thank you.  You’ve been the best of friends.  Just don’t isolate yourself.”

 

“Sara won’t let me.  Even when I try, she seeks me out.”

 

“Are you two?” Yuuri left it hanging.

 

Seung-gil shrugged.  “I don’t know what we are...except for friends.  She’s not put off when I play lone wolf.”

 

Yuuri chuckled before saying, “She can be quite persistent.  I look forward to seeing you.  I hoped we could skate again this season.”

 

“I’ll meet you at Four Continents.  The season isn’t over.”

 

“No, it is not.”

 

Victor and Yuuri watched him retreat before they faced the press.  Two hours later, they were back at their room preparing for a last dip into the onsen.  “I want to take this back with us to Russia,” Victor pouted from the steamy waters.

 

“Same,” Yuuri admitted with a sigh.

 

“March...then all of the onsen love!”

 

Yuuri chuckled warmly, winding his fingers into Victor’s as he rested his cheek on the older man’s shoulder.


	34. Chapter 34

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victor and Yuuri return to St. Petersburg and focus on preparing for the GPF as well as meeting Yuuri’s new students at Lev’s place. Victor takes the ring with Boris.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...there's a rough spot towards the beginning. Just a heads up. There's plenty of lead in to let you know you are going into it. Otherwise, enjoy!
> 
> Thanks so much to my lovely friends and editors, Magrathea and BluSkates!

* * *

 

Yuuri snuggled into Victor’s arms as they settled in for the night.  “So tired,” he murmured against Victor’s shirt.

 

“I know, _lyubov moya_.  One week before we are packing up and leaving for Barcelona.  Our flight should let us arrive two days before we skate.”

 

“Nationals not far after.  I don’t want to be away from you,” Yuuri whined softly and Victor’s arms tightened around him.

 

“I know.  Our flights out of Barcelona go in two different directions.  Have you talked with Minako?”

 

“Mmmhmmm.  And Yuuko.  And Nishigori.  They are going with me to Nationals.  The triplets as well.  I think Mari is hoping to be off.”

 

“Good.  I hate the idea of you being alone.  I want regular reports when you are Sapporo.”

 

“Same with you in Yeketerinburg,” Yuuri returned.  “For now, Barcelona.  Together.”

 

“Mmmm.  Together.”

 

* * *

  


The next day, Victor pulled out the safe where they kept their personal documents.  “Yuuri, where’s your birth certificate?”

 

“It should be with my passport.  My mother has the original but the copy with my passport is certified.  Why?”

 

“Paperwork,” he answered with a frown.  “Maybe it’s still in our carry on.”  He pushed up out of his seat and went to the hall closet.

 

Yuuri went to the safe and started leafing through the documents.  His fingers stilled at an envelope with Yuuri’s name written in cyrillic.  He glanced towards the door where Victor disappeared through and pulled it free.  The closet seemed as good a place as any to disappear.  He could use the excuse of looking through coat pockets for the documents.

 

Moving into the closet, he turned on the bare bulbed light with the pull cord and closed the door.  Crouching into the floor, he stared at the envelope before breaking the seal with shaking fingers.   _I thought he gave this to the police._  He blinked as he studied the Russian script.  Print he handled well but sometimes handwriting left him uncertain.

 

_My dearest Yuuri,_

 

_I know all of this must be strange.  It is to me as well.  To fall so hard for someone I’ve never laid eyes on.  Yet I am drawn to you, thoughts of you, the idea of you.  I know this sounds crazy.  Yet, you were a fan to Victor and look at you now._

 

_I just ask that you hear me out.  I’m an artist and the way you carry yourself, the dancer’s training, the reinforcement on the ice, your perfect grace and balance.  All of these things speak a language that is often missed by common man.  I want to capture your image, to immortalize you in ways others will never be able to imagine._

 

_Does this mean I’m attracted to you?  Yes.  Does this defy professionality?  Absolutely.  Yet, I cannot deny the connection I feel when I look upon you.  I just ask that you don’t dismiss me out of hand._

 

_I know Victor doesn’t let others get close to him.  I felt protected by him but he never let me in too deep.  Yet your movements speak of a deeper soul.  And I can speak to that.  I want to sing to that with my brush and pencil._

 

_I only ask for a chance._

 

_With deepest adoration,_

 

_Sasha_

 

Yuuri let the page flutter to the floor.  He remained still until Victor opened the door.  “Yuuri?”  The younger man lifted brown eyes to meet blue, unshed tears, pale face, and then he started to shake.  Victor knelt down and lifted up the page of writing.  He sighed, thinning his lips.  “I thought I handed that over to the police.  Are you okay?”

 

“I-if I found this?  If I addressed this directly, would it have gone so far?”

 

Victor scanned the lines but then nodded.  “According to Abramovich, his fixation was firmly in place when we arrived.  If I had seen it, though, I would have had him removed sooner.  So...who knows what would have happened?  We can spend our whole life second guessing our actions.  That doesn’t mean it will give us a different result.  He could have made his move sooner.”

 

“I would have never…” his voice trailed off, eyes glued to the page in Victor’s hand.

 

“I know, my Yuuri.  It was all in his mind.  He’s where he needs to be.  In a psychiatric hospital.”

 

“If they let him go before we return to Hasetsu…”

 

“We’ll move.  Back home.  I promise.”

 

Yuuri finally looked up to meet his eyes.  “Did you find the documents you were looking for?”

 

“Yes, love, I did.  Will you come with me?  Out of the closet?  I’ll make [ syrniki ](https://natashaskitchen.com/2012/02/16/ukrainian-syrniki-recipe/)then we’ll go talk to Lev.”

 

Yuuri ran his fingers through his hair but then nodded.  “I want to skate today.”

 

“We will.  There are some adjustments I want to make to our programs.”  Victor guided him out of the closet and into the bedroom.  “Why did you hide?”

 

“I-I...didn’t want you to know I read it,” Yuuri admitted, his eyes darting to the floor, blush touching his cheeks.

 

“Oh, Yuuri...you don’t have to hide from me.  I didn’t think you wanted to read it so I put it away so it wouldn’t upset you.”

 

“I d-didn’t think I wanted to read it either.  But then...it was there.  And, well, curiosity…”

 

“I wish I could protect you from every bad thing in the world.  And I wish they didn’t all try to converge into the same year,” he murmured pulling Yuuri into his embrace.  “Let’s get ready and go see Lev.  Then we can skate.”

 

* * *

  


At the gym, Lev told them they could meet the kids at the youth facility and decide who they would teach.  As they left, Victor noticed the frown.  “What’s that about?” he teased tugging at the pouty lip.

 

“I-I am not good at deciding who will work for things like this.  I’m the kid who wanted to take all the dogs home from the shelter.  Can you imagine how I’ll be with kids?”

 

“It’ll be fine.  And I’ll get to meet your friend Boris.  Perhaps we should take Yuri.  He’s a good judge of character,” Victor pointed out.

 

“Most kids are.  Especially if they’ve lived on the streets.”

 

They pulled the SUV in at the address Lev provided.  Entering the unassuming brick structure, the two skaters were surprised to find a bustling program.  Boris came to greet them.  “Katsudon!  You’ve come to join us!”

 

“Hey, Boris.  This is my partner Victor,” he introduced.  “Vitya, Boris.”

 

Victor shook his hand and offered a wide smile.  “How can we help?”

 

Boris snorted.  “That’s an open question.  I do have a few kids that are interested in the lessons but would you speak with them?  Sometimes they just need to know that others know how to fight for what they want.”

 

They entered the overly large room and several teens looked up curiously.  Yuuri took several quick breaths to calm himself as Boris introduced them.  Those who had heard of Victor already drew near, curiosity piquing their interest.

 

“Hello, how many of you watch figure skating?” Victor asked with his smile.  A few raised their hands.  A few others talked quietly together.  Then one raised their hand.

 

“Mister, are you the one in the ads?”

 

Victor grinned.  “I’m in a number of ads.  Figure skating is an expensive sport and sponsorships help pay for it.”

 

Another teen huffed.  “It looks like it does more than pay for it.”

 

“It does...if you can hold their interest long enough,” Victor admitted, raising an eyebrow and holding the boy’s eyes sternly.  “This is my colleague and student Yuuri Katsuki.  Besides figure skating, he is a dance instructor.”

 

“What good will dance do for us?” another kid asked, his expression teetering between indifference and interest.

 

Yuuri stepped forward to answer that question.  “Dance teaches poise and self-control.  It will raise your confidence.  And because of this, it can open doors to opportunities.”

 

“Will it get me a job?”

 

“It can.  If you use it right.”

 

“What kind of dance will you teach us?”

 

“I have several skills varying from ballet to ballroom, jazz to breaking, hip-hop…”

 

There was a bit of a buzz before the same kid asked, “You’ll teach us to street dance?  I don’t think you can keep up with us.”

 

Yuuri smiled and Victor knew that smile.  He leaned over and whispered into Boris’ ear.  The big man laughed.  “It sounds like we have a challenge.  Andrei?  I hope you brought your skills.”

 

Andrei led the challenge with hip-hop modified somewhat to give it a Russian flare.  Yuuri met him American style.  They traded back and forth sliding between modern street styles and even a few folk.  Yuuri didn’t give.  In the end, his stamina won.  The kid Andrei was breathless.  He grinned.  “You’re cool, I’ll come to your lessons.”

 

Yuuri nodded thoughtfully.  Turning to Victor, he murmured, “Perhaps we can teach those that already dance how to teach others.”

 

“It’s a thought.”

 

Turning back to Andrei, he stared at him thoughtfully.  “If I teach you, will you teach others?”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Pay it forward.  Show the younger ones what you know.”

 

“I could do that,” he said after a moment of serious consideration.

 

“Then pick five others to learn with you.  I have a small dance floor but I can pass it on.”

 

“Alright.  What you got?”

 

“Lev has given me a portion of his gym to use.  We can pick you up here after school.  Take you over for a couple of hours, work you through the basics and how to break it down, add to your skills, then bring you back.  I will show you on Tuesday if you’re interested.  Are we good?”

 

“Yeah, we’re good.  I’ll get your boys.”

 

“We’ll start regular lessons in January but this will let me know what I’ve got to work with.  See you Tuesday.”

  
  


In the car, Victor cocked an eyebrow.  “You handled that pretty good.  I don’t know why you needed me.”

 

“To give me time to find my words.  It helped to meet someone on their own terms.  Once I gained their respect, it was all good.”

 

“You should bring Yura on Tuesday,” Victor suggested.

 

“Not this time.  I want to see what I have to work with.  You can come with me, but I’ll work with them directly.”

 

They spent the next few hours at the rink fine tuning their program.  Two more hours in the studio and the couple found themselves toting back Yuri, Ivan, and Dmitry.  Mila and Georgi had ice late with a few others.

 

* * *

  


Tuesday arrived and Victor found himself standing off to the side while Yuuri got to know his students.  They ranged in age from fourteen to sixteen.  Three lived in an orphanage and used the youth shelter as a retreat from the chaos.  The other two lived in a poor part of town.  The shelter gave them a place to keep out of trouble.  They all wanted to have a chance at life, and Yuuri learned that they studied hard in school and, with Boris’ help, were now on track for university.

 

As Victor watched Yuuri’s interaction, he felt a tap on his shoulder.  Turning, he came face to chest with Boris.  Looking up, he grinned.  “He seems to have it under control.”

 

“He’s a strong man.  Been through a lot but doesn’t let it stop him.”

 

“One of the many reasons I love him,” Victor admitted.  “I’m still astounded he wants me.”

 

“Come and join me in the ring.”

 

“Oh...ummm…”

 

“Your partner fights.  Don’t you?”

 

“I suppose.  Yes.  I fight.  I’m not one for violence, unless forced.”

 

“Often that’s how violence comes to us.  It forces our hand.  The question remains.  Will you have the skills to meet it?”  Boris guided him into the ring.  “Show me what you have.  Don’t hold back.”

 

Victor frowned then hauled off and punched him square in the chest.  Boris didn’t budge.  When Victor looked up to gauge his response, the giant grinned.  “Well, shit!”

 

“I hear you fought the man who hurt your partner.”

 

“I wonder if that’s what pushed him over the edge.”

 

“You blame yourself,” Boris observed.

 

“Perhaps.  I never want to see Yuuri hurt.  He’s...been hurt enough.”

 

“He has...but he doesn’t let it hold him back.  Do you?”

 

Victor’s mouth opened in surprise then frowned.   _Do I?_  “I...don’t know,” he admitted.

 

“That’s a start.  Katsudon comes and fights when he is angry.  He comes with the little tiger.”

 

“I don’t...he’s angry with me.”  Victor studied the floor of the ring.

 

“Are you sure?  It seems like he is angry with many things.  And...it’s possible that you are as well.”

 

“I...am,” he breathed.

 

“It isn’t good to bottle it up.  That makes us lash out at the ones we love.  I always come here after working at the shelter so I don’t take it home to my Irena.”

 

“Oh,” Victor said glancing towards Yuuri.  “I don’t...direct my anger towards Yuuri.  If anything, I turn it on myself.”

 

“That’s not good either.  It will make you sick.  Then how will you defend Russia on the ice?”

 

A smile found his lips.  “I suppose you’re right.  I notice that I’ve...lost weight.  Perhaps I need to come and find an outlet.”

 

“Let me show you what I do to let out my anger.  Then perhaps Lev can take you through his paces.  You will find your own.  But it’s important to start.  You come after you skate.”

 

* * *

  


Driving home after working at Lev’s gym, Victor was subdued.  Yuuri watched him with concern and finally asked, “Are you okay?”

 

“I’m just thinking.  Are you...angry with me?”

 

Yuuri’s eyes started wide.  “N-no?  Why would I-”

 

“I let Sasha get close to you.   _I’m_ angry with me.  So I thought...it made sense that you’d be angry with me.”

 

“No, Vitya, I’m not.  I’m not even sure I’m angry with Sasha.  I’m angry with a system that allowed him to go undiagnosed, that perhaps caused his illness to develop and worsen.  I’m angry with the two men that attacked me in Sochi and who continue to hurt others.  But Sasha...he accepted help.  I know it was forced, in a way, but he could have refused.  I think...Sasha wants to be better.  The other two...I don’t know why they are hurting skaters.  I don’t know if I ever will know.  But...not knowing scares me.  And others becoming hurt because of it angers me.  But…I’m not angry with you.  And I wish you weren’t angry with you, either.”

 

“I’m...working on it.  I think it will take time...but I’m working on it.  Thanks for taking me there.  I wouldn’t have gone if you hadn’t insisted.  I didn’t want to intrude.  I know I hold on too tight sometimes.”

 

“I hold on tightly as well, Vitya,” Yuuri admitted, his fingers sliding over Victor’s thigh.  “You are my safe place, my refuge.”

 

“I failed you.”

 

“There is no perfect refuge.  Maybe if I lived in a walled up tower.  But even Rapunzel had to escape the tower eventually.  No one can thrive isolated from the world.”

 

“I-”

 

“It’s not about you, Vitya.   _I_ don’t blame you for anything that’s happened, and I feel safest with you.  I know you love me and you will do your best to keep me safe.  Just as I would for you.”

 

Victor sighed as he turned into the drive.  “I hear you, Yuuri.  It’s just...it will take time.”

 

“I know,” Yuuri said quietly.  As Victor put the car in park, Yuuri tugged his arm to face him.  Those upturned lips were irresistible as he captured them, licking fire into them before they retreated into their home to continue the exploration.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Favorite part?


	35. Chapter 35

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victor suggests to Yuuri that they skate to Stammi Vicino as a duet like in the ballet. They begin practicing it like an ice dance, adjusting the choreography realizing there was something healing about this skate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So much thanks to my friends/editors Magrathea and BluSkates. I spit out chapters in floods and famine. I appreciate all that you do!
> 
> And thanks so much for reading my works, readers. I do appreciate you all.

* * *

 

 

Yuuri rolled and came to consciousness to the fluttery touch of kisses along his shoulder.   _Did I not put on a shirt when I went to bed?_  Sometimes he stripped in his sleep, though, and would fling the clothes to the side, overheated and uncomfortable.  And Victor could be an electric blanket at times.  He felt a hand tightening across his abs and those lips on the back of his neck.  “Vitya?”

 

He didn’t hear a response so he turned and was greeted with those lips once more, this time on his lips, hands lightly touching his sides as the kiss broke, Yuuri said his name once more and those blue eyes finally blinked open.  Victor’s lips parted in surprise.  “I was dreaming,” he said in confusion.

 

“I think you were doing more than dreaming,” Yuuri pointed out.

 

Victor blushed and started to pull away but Yuuri’s hand was around his waist and held him firmly.  “You plan to leave after you started this?”

 

“I-I don’t want to...you didn’t consent.”

 

Yuuri could see Victor was clearly upset.  His skin paled and he was avoiding eye contact.  “Vitya, if I didn’t want you to touch me, I would have said no.  You weren’t...forcing me.  I just wanted to make sure you were aware.  I was more worried about _your_ consent.”

 

Victor turned uncertain eyes towards him, partially sheltered behind his fringe.  “Y-you were?”

 

“Yes, sweetheart.  Your consent is as important to me as mine is to you.  We’re okay.”  He reached out and traced the back of his finger down the inside of his partner’s arm.

 

“Have I?  Has this happened before?”

 

Yuuri frowned and hesitated answering but Victor leveled a gaze that begged a response.  “Not...so much like that.  You’ve...grinded against me...and well, you masturbated.  But...this is the first time you’ve kissed me and tried to involve me.”  Yuuri ducked down afraid he did something wrong by not telling him sooner.  “I just thought it was wet dreams, you know.  They seemed to occur when things are really stressful and we aren’t...well...doing that much.”

 

Victor considered Yuuri’s words.  Running his hand through his hair, he groaned in frustration.  “It hasn’t happened in a while.  I just thought it was a one time deal.”  Looking up at Yuuri, he frowned, almost pouted.  “You think I’m weird, don’t you?”

 

“No, Vitya, I don’t,” Yuuri stated, leveling his gaze and holding those blue eyes.  “We all react to stress differently.  I’ve read about this...sexsomnia.  It might be something you bring up to Abramovich.”

 

Victor dropped onto the mattress facing away from him and Yuuri resisted the urge to roll his eyes at the drama.  “Now I know I’m weird!”

 

Yuuri wrapped his arms around him from behind.  “How many things have I done that could be considered weird?  Every time you said I was reacting to my stress.  You supported me.  You helped me to find my way back to normal.  I’m not going to turn away from you now.  You are under stress with all that’s going on.  Your body is seeking an outlet.”

 

“What if I...I don’t want to hurt you,” he muttered.

 

Yuuri smoothed his hair.  “You won’t hurt me.”

 

“Are you sure?”

 

Yuuri smiled reassuringly.  “I am sure.”

 

Later Yuuri was preparing breakfast while Victor scrolled his phone.  “It says here that we should sleep separately and you should lock me in my room.”

 

“Those are extreme cases, Vitya.  You are not going to hurt me,” Yuuri insisted as he placed the bowl of eggs and rice before his fiance.

 

Victor frowned.  “Maybe I should move up our appointment with Abramovich.”

 

“It’s already set for tomorrow.  Our schedule is tight.  We’ll be fine.”

 

Victor pouted and sighed.  “It’s just that...if I ever hurt you, I’d never forgive myself.”

 

They ended up moving the appointment up.  Dr. Abramovich met them and Victor recounted the embarrassing story with Yuuri’s additional observations added into the account.  The doctor took it in stride.  “Have you been dealing with additional stresses?”

 

“Competition and they still haven’t found Yuuri’s attackers.  Of course, there is also what we’ve been working on...the, uh, self-blame.  And then...well, Phichit received some messages.  Images really suggesting a kidnapping threat...pictures of bondage scenes in instagram.  Maybe it’s nothing but we had him...well, Yuuri did, really...but he sent the images to Nikolai at Interpol.  And well, I don’t want Yuuri hurt...and I don’t want my friends hurt.  This next competition...I know every one of them.”

 

“So yes, you’ve been dealing with a great deal of additional stress,” Dr. Abramovich concluded.  Turning to Yuuri he asked, “how are you dealing with these stressors, old and new?”

 

“Well, some days I go to the gym or the rink or the studio and fight it out physically.  Some days...I hide in closets.  But Victor is able to pull me out of my retreats.  But I guess...that just adds more pressure to him.”  Yuuri looked down at his hands uncertainly.

 

“Nonono, Yuuri,” Victor responded, turning towards him and taking his hands.  “You aren’t adding pressure to me.  I just...I think we are in the same place.  We just want this to be over.”

 

“What positives are you working on?” Dr. Abramovich asked.

 

“Positives?” the two men echoed.

 

“Yes.  What are you doing together or separately to balance out the bad stuff.”

 

Yuuri and Victor met each other’s eyes as they considered the words.  Finally, Yuuri answered, “I donated my birthday which led to a long term commitment with a youth shelter to teach dance.”

 

“Okay.  Victor?”

 

“I’m helping Yuuri,” he answered weakly.

 

“I see,” Dr. Abramovich responded.  “Okay, so what are you doing for yourselves or each other?”

 

“We...got engaged,” Victor suggested.

 

“That just kind of happened...because I messed up at a press conference and we were like, why not?”

 

Dr. Abramovich smiled.  “I’m honestly surprised you weren’t already engaged.  What else?”

 

“We...take care of each other.  Little things.  I don’t know…” Victor trailed off uncertainly.

 

“I want you to do two things, Victor.  I want you to find a way to reach out...for your own sake, not for Yuuri’s.  And...for both of you...work on something together...purposefully...mindfully.  When we are surrounded by negative incidents, our body starts responding defensively.  Yuuri, you hide in closets.  Victor, you...experience sexsomnia and become overprotective.  One way to work on this is to balance the equation.  Put some positives in to outweigh the negatives.  It will take a while to build up but you might as well start now.”

 

“Is that all?” Victor asked.  “I don’t...want to hurt Yuuri.”

 

“I don’t expect any danger in that.  It’s a very mild case of sexsomnia.  You don’t pose a threat.  But we will work on it through talk therapy.  If it doesn’t subside, we can look at medications but you’ve both expressed a desire to avoid that if possible.”

 

Victor took a deep breath and released it slowly.  “Okay.  If you both think I’m not a danger to Yuuri...I guess I won’t make him lock me in a room.”

 

“You will be fine.  You both will.  Just keep coming in.  We’ll continue to build on the foundation we’ve already laid.  Now...I believe you both have homework.  Get to it.”

 

The two men left the doctor’s office.  Victor held onto Yuuri’s hand tightly.  “You probably think I’m ridiculously silly,” he said quietly, his eyes downcast.

 

Yuuri shook his head, his voice soft in answer.  “No, Vitya.  Not at all.  If you needed this to give you peace, so be it.  You wouldn’t deny me that comfort.”

 

“I just...I’d never forgive myself if...well, I guess we don’t have to worry about that.  Shall we...go to the rink?”

 

Yuuri smiled reassuringly.  “Of course, Vitya.”

 

* * *

  


Yuuri helped the little blonde stretch his leg back, guiding his form.  “I’m still going to kick your ass, Katsudon,” he sputtered.

 

Yuuri grinned.  “Bring it on,” he responded.  “Turn your ankle a bit clockwise.  There.  Now you have it.”  

 

The younger man moved gracefully.  “I just need a bit more in my Biellmann.”

 

“I know.  These are the [ stretches ](https://www.thoughtco.com/using-the-barre-ballet-stretches-1007336)I work through to get there.  Once again from the top.”

 

Yuuri brought his leg up to the barre, stretched with his opposite arm, then stretched into a straddle split position.  He reversed his straddle stretch, then stretching over his bent leg.  He then stretched backwards before pulling upright and then extending his leg up.  Holding his right foot, he bent forward then stretched backwards.  Pulling into a leg extension, he breathed through that stretch.  Next he turned to extend his leg behind him in similar form to the Biellmann.  He then slid his hand down to his knee until he was in attitude position.  He dropped his chest to stretch forward then straightened his leg into an arabesque penchee.

 

The blond nodded that he got it and stepped back in to run through them again.  “Madame Lilia probably eats up that you go through all of the fundamentals,” he groaned out between his turns.

 

“That’s what she stressed and appreciated my dance philosophy being grounded in fundamentals,” the brunette replied as he corrected the younger Yuri’s form.  Glancing up, he spotted Victor leaning against the facing of the door a soft smile on his lips.

 

“ _Moy lyubovnik i moy mladshiy brat_ ,” the older man murmured.

 

Yuuri stilled, his eyes narrowed at something familiar in that phrase.  

 

“I’m not your little brother, geezer!” the bond retorted.

 

Yuuri turned back to the youth and frowned.  “Now your form is way off.  Way to let him bait you,” Yuuri chastised.

 

“He has to go and make everything awkward.  Send him away.”

 

Yuuri leveled a gaze towards Victor.  “I’ll meet you later on the ice.  This is Yura’s time.”

 

The blond smirked as Victor opened his mouth to protest.  Yuuri’s eyes held firm, though, and the silver-haired man shlumped off, all pouty.

 

“It’s good for him to not always get his way,” Yuri stated.

 

The older man smiled, indulgent eyes settling on the youth.  He knew that the younger man was jealous of his time.  He could give him this little bit.

 

* * *

  
  


The rink was in half light as everyone cleared out.  Victor skated before Yuuri who leaned against the rail tilting up his water bottle.  “I have an idea if you are open,” he murmured, a nervous fidget in his hand.  Yuuri set his water bottle down and tilted his head curiously.  “Remember how in the spring we danced _Stammi Vicino_ as a duet?”  He watched Yuuri’s expression widen in interest.  “Well, I was thinking.  Why don’t we practice a similar exhibition skate as a pairs routine to the same song?”

 

Yuuri’s eyes went thoughtful as he considered the possibilities.  “We could do that.  Do you have the choreography worked out?”

 

“For the most part.  How do you feel about...lifts?”

 

Yuuri smiled in amusement.  “I trusted you in ballet, I suppose I could trust you when it’s ramped up to figure skating speed.  No throws, though.  That’s just nuts!”

 

Victor laughed.  “Okay.  No throws.”  He proceeded to walk Yuuri through the choreography he had already planned out.  Yuuri broke in from time to time to verify what he wanted and then he continued.  Once Yuuri had a solid idea, he skated to the middle of the ice and waited for Victor’s cue.

 

Victor counted him out then Yuuri began to work through the original routine until the change took place and Victor joined him.  They marked the lifts the first time through as well as the jumps.  The second time through they added the jumps.  Once they had the routine down, they retreated to the ballet studio to practice the lifts on sure footing before taking it to the ice.  As they left, Victor had his arms wrapped around Yuuri’s waist and a pleasant sense of well-being settled upon him.

 

“Thank you, Yuuri.  I really wanted to try this.”

 

“Of course.  It will be...surprising...if we pull it off.”

 

Victor smiled a secret smile and hummed thoughtfully as he opened the door for Yuuri.  The younger man watched him curiously but Victor gave nothing else away.

 

* * *

  


Victor dropped Yuuri off at the rink the next morning.  “Aren’t you coming in?” he asked.

 

“I have a few things to take care of.  I’ll be back by lunch,” he promised.

 

Yuuri frowned but nodded, turning to retreat to the ice.

 

His concentration was off as he waited for Victor’s return.  Yakov called him out more than once before finally sending him to the studio.  The younger Yuri poked his head in as he stretched.  “What’s wrong, Katsudon?”

 

Yuuri shrugged.  “Victor dropped me off and didn’t tell me where he was going.  I mean...he doesn’t have to.  He has the right to privacy.  It’s just that...he usually does.  And it has me distracted.”

 

An hour later, Victor poked his head into the studio.  “I heard you got kicked off the ice,” he smirked.

 

“I kept falling.  Is everything...are you okay?”

 

“Of course.  Like I said, I just had a few errands.  Do you want to try the ice now?”

 

Yuuri nodded, taking the offered hand.  “Of course.  I should be settled now.”  As they left the studio, he tightened his hand on Victor’s drawing a questioning stare from the older man.  “Are you sure everything's okay?”

 

“Yes, _lyubov moya_ , I am certain.”  He pulled Yuuri into his arms and brushed his lips through his hair.  “Trust me.  I’ll tell you if it’s not.”

 

“It’s just...with Phichit…”

 

“I’m not Phichit.  I know if I kept something like that from you that it would only upset you more.  Everything is fine.”  They continued on to the ice and practice but Yuuri cast surreptitious glances his direction as they worked on honing his components and choreography.

 

* * *

  


Victor approached their bed nervously, something that wasn’t normal for him.  He kept glancing up to see Yuuri looking at him in concern.  “Maybe I should…”

 

“You are not sleeping in another room.  You will not hurt me.”

 

“Are you sure?” he asked, a whimper breaking through.  Yuuri could be certain, but he was not sure.  He was terrified of hurting Yuuri.

 

The younger man stepped before him and ran his hand down the side of his cheek, his thumb brushing over his lover’s lips.  “You won’t hurt me,” he reiterated.  “I am yours.”  And to punctuate that statement, he lifted up on his toes to brush his lips over Victor’s.  The older man was hesitant at first but then opened up to him.  Yuuri took his hand and guided it down to his hips.  “I give myself to you.  Make love to me, Vitya,” he directed.

 

Victor’s lips parted before slanting down and grabbing the raven’s lips in a much more insistent kiss.  Yuuri pressed into him, his body conforming to the planes of Victor’s.  Victor’s hands roved Yuuri’s body, up his back, down his hips, around his rear.  Yuuri’s arms were around Victor’s neck tangling the long fingers into silver hair but as Victor’s hands reached the pert ass, Yuuri used that momentum to pull himself up, his legs wrapping around Victor.  Victor pulled back from the kiss in surprise and caught the twinkle in Yuuri’s eyes.  “Lifts,” he smirked.

 

Victor groaned and kissed him once more, his arms tightening around Yuuri as he supported him.  Breaking the kiss once more, he muttered, “Bed.”

 

“You are my partner,” Yuuri murmured.  “Take me where you will.”

 

Victor’s knee found the mattress and then he lowered the younger man carefully before stretching out beside him.  His fingers began fumbling with the tie on Yuuri’s running pants before the elastic was free to slip down his hips.  Victor guided them over his hips as Yuuri tilted his pelvis up to assist.  Victor couldn’t resist tracing the arch formed by the movement with  his eyes then mouth.  The pants discarded along with Yuuri’s boxers, he moved to the shirt and it was soon gone.  He then gave into Yuuri’s insistent hands tugging at the hem of his shirt, curving his body to allow Yuuri to pull it free.  Yuuri leaned forward and captured the pink buds, sucking and teasing as Victor clasped him to his chest.  “God, Yuuri,” he murmured.  Truth be told, he was as much Yuuri’s as Yuuri was his.

 

Hands tugged at his own pants and Victor moved to help him remove the impediment.  Now, naked before one another, Victor studied the man seated on the mattress before him even as he stood on the floor in the part of his legs.  Yuuri leaned forward, his mouth tracing the hipbone with kisses and licks.  Victor tangled his fingers into messy dark hair.  

 

Those lips found his hardened length and Victor’s breath sucked in as a tongue teased along the vein and encircled the corona.  Yuuri sucked at the tip for a moment, his tongue teasing along the slit before he sucked Victor back in, slow, deliberate, causing a moan to break free from the older man’s lips.  He continued to bob up and down until Victor pulled him off with a tug of his hair.  Yuuri looked up at him, his eyes blown hungry for the man before him.

 

“Scoot back and lay down,” Victor commanded.  Yuuri used his feet to slide him back along the sheet until he was nestled into the pillows.  Victor climbed after him, pausing to pull the lube and condoms from the nightstand.  “I want to come inside you.”

 

Yuuri answered wordlessly with a part of his legs, tilting them up.  Victor settled a pillow beneath the younger man’s hips.  He lightly touched Yuuri’s inner thighs with his nails as he guided the brunette to part his legs just a little further.  “God, you’re beautiful, my sweet Yuuri.”  Victor couldn’t believe the picture before him was his whenever he wanted.  Victor lowered himself down to tease Yuuri’s shaft with kisses down the length.  

 

Yuuri moaned in response, lifting his hips restlessly.  “Inside,” he demanded, his voice holding a pleading tone.  

 

Victor chuckled warmly.  “Patience, my love,” he murmured.  Still, he pulled the lubricant closer and began to work the fluid between his fingers until it was warmed and the fingers properly slick.  He leaned forward and began to tease the head with his tongue until he heard that needy moan.  That sound, that hunger, was the signal he sought and his fingers circled the entrance.  The muscle knew his touch and gave easily, greedily sucking in his finger.  Victor began working the younger man open.  They had a small window where they could be this intimate before the GPF demanded they back off.  He wanted Yuuri in top form and knew Yuuri wanted the same for him.  As he sucked Yuuri down his throat, his second finger made its way inside.  Yuuri tilted his hips seeking more...of everything.  

 

Victor pulled his fingers free and reached for the condom, dipping down to suck a mark into his lover’s inner thigh.  Pulling free of the beautiful bruise, he licked and nuzzled the mark before pulling the condom package to his teeth and tearing it open.  Rolling the latex on with his clean hand, he reached for the lube and added more slick to the surface.  Looking up, he could see Yuuri chewing his lower lip impatiently.  Settling a hand on his lover’s hip, he held still until Yuuri’s eyes met his.  Holding those eyes, he eased into his lover’s entrance receiving a groan in response.  Yuuri canted up his hips to pull him deeper and Victor continued to ease into the tight warmth of his lover.  “You feel so exquisite wrapped around me like this,” Victor murmured.  He received a wordless smile of encouragement.  He knew when Yuuri’s emotions overwhelmed him, he struggled for words.  But they still communicated.  And with an impatient wave of his hand, Yuuri insisted he sink deeper until Victor was settled in deeply.

 

As they grew used to each other, Victor leaned forward to capture those lips.  Yuuri’s hands wrapped around his neck and his lips held onto the kiss even as his hips grew restless and demanded movement from his older partner.  Victor began the slow movements adjusting to increase his fiance’s pleasure.  He swallowed Yuuri’s soft cries and moans, tasting his lips in a continuous kiss through the movements, one hand resting on Yuuri’s hip grounding the movement as Yuuri’s leg wrapped around him, the other hand on Yuuri’s side supporting him as the younger man wound his arms around his  back and neck, fingers tangled into the older man’s hair.

 

An impatient moan let Victor know Yuuri was close and he moved a hand down to grab his length, continuing his kiss, continuing to move in and out of him, his hand now joining the rhythm created by their bodies.  Yuuri’s quickening breath forced him to turn out of the kiss but Victor continued to flutter kisses over his cheek and chin and lips when Yuuri dipped back in to grab the older man’s lips.

 

Yuuri came with a cry and Victor felt every vibration of his lover’s orgasm down his shaft.  Yuuri’s arms tightened around him and he felt the younger man shake in his release.  Victor was pulled over the edge by Yuuri’s response and dropped his forehead into the curve of Yuuri’s neck as he felt his own body shake through his orgasm.  Yuuri’s arms continued to hold onto him and he felt flutters of kisses along his hairline.  

 

The waves finally subsided and Victor lay spent in Yuuri’s arms.  The younger man wasn’t much better, his arms weakly holding him.  They lay like that long enough for Yuuri start to squirm from the stickiness of his own release.  Victor finally rolled off of him, pulling Yuuri’s fingers up to his lips.  “I love you,” he murmured.  Yuuri replied with a soft smile and a nod.  

 

Victor found his feet and went for a wet cloth to clean Yuuri up, discarding the condom along the way.  The other man clean, he saw to his own discomfort before drawing the younger man into his arms.  Yuuri settled into the his arms.  They lay still for some time before he finally heard Yuuri’s answering murmur.  “I love you, too.”

 

* * *

  


[ What is sleep sex? ](https://www.healthline.com/health/sleep-sex#overview1)  (Because I shouldn’t watch Law and Order: SVU before I write.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know! You've figured out my secret! I watch a consummate amount of Law and Order: Criminal Intent/Special Victims Unit as well as ID. 
> 
> Regardless, it does make for an odd twist in stress manifestation. ;)


	36. Chapter 36

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Unexpected events...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much to my marvelous editors/friends Magrathea and BluSkates. I truly appreciate you both.

* * *

 

Victor rolled over and groaned, his head aching with the change in weather.  He pulled the blanket up over his silver locks to cut out the light and felt movement next to him.  Stilling, a furry huff next to his ear, he realized that it was Makkachin.  Turning, he peeked from beneath the covers and received a generous lick across his face.  “Makkaaaa…” he complained before rising up and looking around.  The sun was up and Yuuri hadn’t bothered to wake him.  He swung his legs around and sighed heavily.  He spotted a note on the mirror.

 

_Vitya,_

 

_You slept lousy last night and after trying to wake you up three different times, I called Yakov and he gave you the day off to recuperate.  I’m riding in with the team.  Rest.  Drink tea.  He wants you on the ice tomorrow._

 

_Yuuri_

 

Victor smiled at the way his fiance scrolled a heart into the loops of his name.  He moved back to their bed and snuggled around Makkachin.  Yuuri was safe with Yakov and he was home.

 

* * *

  


Victor later moved downstairs and stretched out on the sofa, lazy and relaxed.  He flipped the channel and settled on _Bednaya Nastya_.  The historical drama held his attention for the next hour easily.

 

Victor received an alert from his social media team that dragged his attention away from the Russian soap opera.  He pulled his phone out and frowned.  He sent in the ID key code then received a call.  “Mr. Nikiforov, we’ve received some disturbing photos tagging you in social media.”

 

“I get those all the time.”

 

“These are specific to you, sir.  I think you should review the file I sent you.”

 

Victor pulled out his laptop and opened it up.  It took a moment to connect with the foul weather outside.  Finally, he managed to open his private email and studied the contents of the folder.  Picking his phone back up, he agreed, “You were right to send these to me.  These are similar to the ones sent to a friend.  Send me all of the associated information.  I’m forwarding these to Interpol.”

 

He stared at the pictures in his email a while longer.  Just like Phichit.  Three images.  Frowning, he reached for his phone and sent a message to Yakov to call him as soon as possible.

 

Yuuri is going to freak out when he sees these.  How the hell will he skate after this?  Will I be able to keep him safe?  His phone buzzing pulled him from his thoughts.

 

“ _Allo_ ,” he answered.

 

“Vitya, what’s wrong?”  The wizened coach’s voice was gruff, but his concern was obvious.

 

“I...was contacted by the team that tracks my social media with some concerns.  There are...some questionable images.”

 

“In what manner?  If you and Yuuri have been caught out in public doing who knows what…”

 

“No, no, nothing like that,” Victor hastened in reply.  “It’s...I think it’s them.  I sent the information to Nikolai.  I think...it’s a threat.”

 

Yakov was quiet for a long time.  “Send them to me,” he finally said, his voice soberly calm.

 

“I will.  I don’t know what to do about...Yuuri,” he answered, his voice pained.

 

“You have to tell him, Vitya.  Have you even considered that these threats are a decoy?”

 

Victor’s breath caught.  He went for the obvious.  Of course his cunning coach would look beneath the surface.  “I didn’t...consider that.  Some similar images were sent to Phichit.”

 

“You have to tell him.”

 

“I-I will,” Victor responded, his hand lowering the phone unconsciously hanging up.  Nausea welled up and he sought the downstairs bathroom to empty his stomach.  Standing up, he found a cloth, dampened it and washed his face.  He rinsed it out thoroughly and placed it on the back of his neck.  “Yuuri…” he murmured.

 

Victor was curled up on the sofa staring listlessly into the fire when his phone buzzed again.  He sat up feeling the fringed afghan settle around his hip as he reached for the device.  Nikolai.  He answered the call.  “Mr. Nikiforov?”

 

“Da.  This is he,” he answered.

 

“We’ve got our team on this digging through the electronic signatures and working on a trace.  However, given the imminent competition where both of you will attend, we plan to have a team on site.  I want to check in with you once you arrive.”

 

“You?”

 

“Yes.  I’m personally heading this up.  My uncle will verify my identity to you, as we’ve never met in person, and I’ve already arranged for rooms.  Contact is being made with the ISU and we are securing the extra documentation needed to be on the floor with the skaters.”

 

“I see.  Do you think that will keep my Yuuri safe?”

 

“We’re hoping it will keep all of you safe.  We’ll be in touch when you reach Barcelona.  Let me know if anything else comes through.”

 

“I will.  Thank you.”  Disconnecting the call, he stared once more in the fire, his breathing becoming difficult and unfamiliar.  It took a moment for it to register that this was panic.  He’s helped Yuuri through this.   _Five things._  His eyes rested on the fire, the wine glass, Makkachin sleeping on the rug, his phone, Yuuri’s _Game of Thrones_ coasters. _Four things._  Closing his eyes, he reached out his hand.  The soft afghan, the crushed velvet of the sofa, the brocade of the pillow, the cool wood of the carved arms.   _Three things.  I hear Makka snoring, the crackle of the fire, the rain falling outside.  Two things.  I can smell the dampness in the air and the pages of my book.  I can taste the remains of my wine._  Blinking he realized his breathing settled.

 

He gathered the afghan around his shoulders and his phone in his hand as he wandered into the kitchen and found some left overs.  He was still staring at his plate hours later when Yuuri walked through the door.

 

Yuuri’s eyebrows narrowed.  “Vitya?”

 

Victor blinked his thoughts back into focus.  “Yuuriiii…” he breathed.  “You’re home.”

 

“Are you okay?”  Yuuri was up by his side taking note of the cold dish and Victor’s disoriented look.

 

“I...had some alarming information come through.  I-I don’t want to tell you.”

 

Yuuri frowned.  “Can you...show me?”

 

Victor nodded hesitantly, offering him his hand.  They moved into the room where his computer was set up and he opened the screen.  After a moment, it came back to life and Victor typed in his password.  Yuuri narrowed his eyes sharply.  “You did not just type in your birth year and Makkachin as your password,” he asked.

 

“Maybe?” Victor said startled out of the state of his thoughts.

 

Yuuri frowned.  “We’re going to change that but first show me what was sent to you.”  Victor didn’t move and Yuuri slid his arms around his shoulders.  “Vitya, you need to show me.  This is clearly upsetting you and you promised you’d never keep things from me.  Especially important things.”

 

“I-I promised,” he whispered, almost a breath.  His fingers moved in autopilot tapping the strokes and guiding the mouse until Victor’s email was opened and the message was before Yuuri.

 

Yuuri’s eyes widened.  He studied the images.  “Oh, wow!  Those are like…”

 

“Phichit’s.  I know.”

 

“Wh-ho have you told?”

 

“Nikolai and Yakov.  I was waiting...for you to come home.  I didn’t want to alarm you.”

 

“I see.”  His fingers brushed over the surface of the screen.  “This is the kind of rope they use in mountain climbing.”

 

“A different color but the same thing as Phichit’s.”

 

“A-and...that is the d-drug they used on m-me.”

 

“I know...or at least suspected.”

 

The third item caused his breath to catch.  “A knife?”

 

“Phichit’s had tape and zipties.  I hate the feeling that this is some kind of morbid shopping list.”

 

“What did Nikolai say?”

 

“He’s sending a team to Barcelona.  Heading it up himself.”

 

“That makes me feel...somewhat better,” Yuuri stated.  Yuuri pulled away, standing at the sink at first before filling a glass with water and drinking it down.  “I think...I’m going to go lay down.”  Victor watched him disappear towards the stairs.

 

Victor busied himself with cleaning up the kitchen, feeding the dogs, and pulling out the [ schi ](https://fearlessfresh.com/beefy-russian-cabbage-soup/)in the crock to start it heating up.  Maybe this would warm them both up inside because the messages in his email certainly made him feel cold through and through.  He turned and looked at the dogs as they finished up their meal.  With a frown, he pointed to the stairs.  “Go to Yuuri.”  They both took off and climbed the stairs.  He worried about his partner but didn’t want to crowd him.

 

“I’ll give him another half hour,” he decided, taking a cup of tea to the living room.  He wrapped himself up once more in the afghan and stared again at the fire.

 

Time ticked by slowly but half an hour later Yuuri still hadn’t emerged.  Victor placed his now cold tea on the table and climbed the stairs pulling the blanket around him.

 

Yuuri was curled up in their bed, his arm thrown over Cocoa, Makkachin draped over the curl of his legs.  Victor slid in behind him and nuzzled into the hair at the back of his neck.  “I’m worried about you.”

 

Yuuri sighed and shifted to look at him.  “I’m just...scared.  And I didn’t know what to say.”

 

“You can tell me that you’re scared.  Do you want to see Abramovich?”

 

“This isn’t my anxiety.  This is real.  I think we should be afraid.”  He turned onto his back and Makkachin huffed as she rearranged herself around Yuuri’s legs.  Staring up at the ceiling, he frowned.  “We should call Phichit and Chris.  And we should share the images.  I think it’s best that we all have the same information.”

 

“Okay.  Why don’t we do a Skype call after we eat?  I’ll send the information with the notification of the plan.”

 

“I think...that’s the smart thing to do.”

 

* * *

  


An hour later, the two lovers sat wrapped up on their own individual blankets, cups of soup in hand, as they waited for the call to connect.  Chris accepted the call first.  He appeared fresh off the ice.  “ _Allo_ , Chris.  Are you still at the rink?”

 

“ _Oui_.  Josef gave me use of his office as long as I promised to fill him in on any concerns.”

 

“Did you receive the email?”

 

“ _Oui_.  It’s startling...especially given what was sent to Phichit.  Is my Peach joining us?”

 

“He’s been delayed,” Yuuri responded.  “He’ll dial in once he comes off the ice for a break.”

 

“Good.”

 

“Your Peach?  Does this mean you two have made up?” Victor asked needing something pleasant.

 

“We are...working on it.  What are you eating, Vitya?”

 

“Schi.  Cook made it the other night and sent a pot over for us.  There are advantages to living close to Lilia.”

 

An alarm informed them of Phichit joining in the call and then they laid eyes on the Thai’s face.  He smiled but for once it seemed strained.  “Phi?  Are you okay?” Yuuri asked worried.

 

“I just...Ciao Ciao wasn’t happy with how I handled those messages and now that he knows similar messages were sent to Victor, he’s up in arms.  And well...I think I’m scared, too.”

 

“Good,” three other men echoed in response.

 

“Why is it good?”

 

“Perhaps you’ll be a little more careful, darling,” Chris responded.  “Now what do we know?”

 

“I’m surprised you haven’t been looped into this group of torments.  Yura as well,” Yuuri stated with a frown.  “Both of you are just as close to us.”

 

“We are...but Phichit is within their type.  And Yuuri, you have to admit that something happening to Victor would hurt you the most.”

 

“Why is it so personal with me?”

 

Chris sighed.  “There is no telling.  It’s almost as if you were the primary target and the others are secondary.”

 

“I...was afraid of that as well.  So, how do we keep safe?”

 

“Staying together seems to be our best plan.  We leave the room in pairs or more.  We continue to team up with other skaters,” Chris recapped.

 

“It seemed to work the last time.  Oh, did I tell you I think they were there?” Yuuri stated.

 

“Victor filled us in that you thought you smelled them and that you were very upset.  Anything at the NHK?”

 

“No,” Victor stated.  “Of course, we didn’t stay at the same hotel.”

 

“I know...I’m jealous of those pictures.  You’ll have to give me the location,” Chris purred softly.  A visible pink rose up on Phichit’s cheeks.

 

The Thai man added, “I’ve just done an initial digging through those pictures and they are stock images like the ones sent to me.  So nothing really identifying.  Keep sending them, though.  You never know when they’ll slip up.”

 

“I will.  Keep us in the loop if either of you hear anything as well.  Send us your flight information.  I booked us to adjoining rooms once again.”

 

“Oh!  That worked out so well last time!” Phichit exclaimed.  “In spite of everything, I can’t wait to see everyone.”

 

Plans solidified, they disconnected the call and Yuuri turned into Victor’s arms.  “Glass of wine and a fire?”

 

“Sounds like an excellent plan.  You get cozy and I’ll bring the glasses.”

 

Soon they were settled in sipping a pinot.  Yuuri felt the effects of the alcohol reigning in his anxiety as he lay quietly against Victor’s chest.  Their glasses empty, they moved upstairs and snuggled close, chasing away the chill with body heat and fluffy poodles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things were bound to pop up.
> 
> Thanks for reading! :)


	37. Chapter 37

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our boys made it to Barcelona! A bit of fluff and fun in this one. Hope you enjoy their adventures!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, Blu and Mag!

* * *

 

 

Victor and Yuuri arrived at their hotel first and Yuuri fell into bed.  Victor knew it wasn’t so much jetlag this time.  They got up and caught a 7:45 flight, landing before noon in Barcelona.  However, his lover did not sleep well the night before, his anxiety inventing endless, horrific scenarios, grabbing hold of every wooly thought and dissecting it.

 

Victor tucked him in before unpacking, hanging up their clothes, and organizing the various outfits.  Yuuri watched him through heavy lids.  “Why did you bring such formal clothes?  My suit would have been fine for the banquet,” he muttered in cranky complaint.

 

“Don’t worry, my Yuuri.  I’ll take care of you and you won’t have to worry about what you are wearing from one event to the next,” Victor responded with a wink.

 

Yuuri groaned and rolled over to face the window, arms wrapping around Cocoa.  She tapped her tail happily.  Nosing under Yuuri’s chin, the ravenette gave into a giggle drawing a smiling glance from his fiance.

  
Victor soon had their clothes in order, their toiletries in the bathroom, and the rest of their gear stowed and accessible.  Movement next door told him Chris arrived.  Phichit wasn’t due until later that afternoon.  Victor knocked before opening the door between them.

 

“Mon dieu!  I just arrived!” Chris greeted.  “Is your gorgeous lover asleep?”  Chris poked his head into the room and smiled teasingly towards Yuuri who squinted sleepily in his direction.

 

“I think he’s well on his way,” Victor answered with an eyebrow raised.

 

“Yuuri, darling, since you are napping, do you mind if I steal your man for a few hours?”  Chris waited for an answer and received a wave in reply.  He jerked Victor through the door and into the next room, their voices becoming a quiet lull.  “Is everything in order?”

 

“Almost.  We have a few stops to make.  I’ve got the paperwork in order, though.”

 

“Good.  I can’t believe you’re doing this.”

 

Victor grinned.  “I love him.”

 

Chris’ laugh lyrically wrapped around his friend.  “Well, let’s get those rings.”

 

They left and soon found themselves wandering through the Christmas market.  “What time’s Phichit’s flight?”

 

“We’ve got time.  We’ll head to the airport at five and bring him back.”

 

Victor studied his friend.  “Are you two really okay?”

 

“I’m not saying there isn’t still some strain.  But...how do I say this.  He completes me.  Maybe we should have come together later in life.  Perhaps we would have if all of this with Yuuri hadn’t happened.  However, you can’t tell me that you don’t believe you and Yuuri wouldn’t still be together.”

 

Victor smiled, his eyes glowing in the glow of the street markets.  “I have no doubt that we’d be together.  We are drawn to one another.”

 

“It’s the same with Phichit and me.  He’s my other side.  It’s just...bumpy right now.”

 

“And the thing with Seung-gil?”

 

“I think it’s more friendship on his side to be honest.  We shall see.  He’s coming to watch the competition.”

 

“Really?  And you think it’s just friendship.”

 

Chris shot him a look and Victor closed his mouth.  “I’m not certain.  I just...I love him, okay?  And maybe it hurts sometimes, but I can’t seem to let him go.  He’s not really lied to me about what’s been going on with him and Seung-gil.  I just...I have to try.”

 

Victor grabbed his hand and gave it a squeeze.  “Neither Yuuri nor I want to see you hurt.  I’ve heard Yuuri argue with Phichit about how he’s handling this situation.  It’s strange.  When it comes to Yuuri, Phichit is the wise and all-knowing.  He can reach Yuuri when others can’t.”

 

“I think that title was usurped by a certain Russian,” Chris pointed out as he studied a street vendor’s wares.

 

Victor shrugged.  “It just seemed so natural with Phichit.  And I guess I forgot for a while how young he actually is.”

 

“I...haven’t.  He sometimes feel younger.  Then other times, he shakes off that immaturity and I see the man I fell for.  It’s...a regression.  Maybe without the responsibility of watching out for Yuuri, he’s rebelling a little.  I don’t know.  Do you think I’m foolish?”

 

“I think...I would have left.  Made him chase me.  You are too flexible in this arrangement and I worry you are being taken for granted.”

 

“The road hasn’t been smooth for you and Yuuri,” Chris pointed out in counter.

 

Victor stared off in the distance.  “It hasn’t...and we’ve been to counselors.  Lots of them.  We keep each other accountable but we are both working towards this relationship.”

 

“Whereas...Phichit is fighting it.”  Chris frowned, sadness settling into his countenance.  “I’m going to get my heart broken, aren’t I?”

 

“I’m worried that is exactly what will happen.  Phichit needs to shake off this immaturity or he isn’t ready for this relationship.  Yeah, sure you’re having fun when you’re together.  But...you’re ignoring what’s important.”

 

“You are a good friend.”

 

Victor smiled sadly.  “I’m a  _ great  _ friend!” he emphasized trying to break the mood.

 

“I’m...not ready to give him up.  If...it comes to that, will you still be there to help me pick up the pieces?  And not tell me you told me so.”

 

Victor squeezed his hand once more.  “Of course I’ll be there for you.  We both will.  Yuuri loves his friend but that doesn’t mean he agrees with how he is acting.  He won’t turn his back on you.”

 

Chris closed his eyes and forced his expression to clear.  “You said something about rings?”

 

“I ordered them from this jeweler.  According to my phone, it’s just around the corner.”  They walked past a candy vendor and then he spotted it beyond the fountain.  “There!”  They went inside.  Victor quickly completed the transaction and opened the box.

 

“They are very simple.”

 

“The starbursts are to symbolize snowflakes, frost, the ice.  Inside them is printed  _ Stammi Vicino _ .  Stay close to me.  It’s us in a nutshell.”

 

Chris smiled.  “Very.  I’m glad...your special someone loves you back just as much.”

 

“He really does,” Victor agreed quietly.  As they walked out of the shop, Victor allowed his eyes to rest sadly on his friend.  “You will stand up with me, won’t you?” he asked quietly.

 

“Always,” Chris answered, looping an arm loosely around his shoulder.

 

They met Phichit at the airport an hour later.  “Where’s Yuuri?” he asked then he grinned.  “Let me guess.  Taking a nap.”

 

“Well, he hasn’t sent me a text stating otherwise,” Victor offered with a shrug.

 

* * *

  
  
  


Yuuri woke up in the room he shared with his fiance.  He rolled over and checked his phone and smiled as he realized Phichit arrived.  Victor and Chris seemed to have explored some of the Christmas markets.  He started to text and ask if they were coming back soon but then decided not to bother them.   _ They are having so much fun.  I’ll just drag them down _ .  He turned over with a pout and wrapped back around Cocoa.

 

He was scrolling his social media and heard the door open behind him.  He turned over in time to be ambushed by three men.  “Look at you hiding out!” Phichit accused and the next thing he knew he was being tickled and couldn’t tell whose hands were whose.   Between laughing and gasping for air he tried to wriggle free only to find himself blocked.  It really wasn’t fair three against one.

 

_ Three against one. _

 

_ Damn. _

 

_ Why did I not remember that? _

 

_ That’s pretty important. _

 

Victor picked up on the change in behavior before the others and stilled.  They took their signal from him.  “Yuuri?  Are you okay?”

 

Yuuri nodded before stating, “There were three of them.”

 

“Three?” Victor glanced at the others in confusion.

 

“The third was not physically there.  They...talked to them.  H-how?”  He blinked through the memories, crowded, shadowed, drug-fogged.  “They called me... _ mladshiy brat _ .”  Yuuri shoved his hand through his bangs resting the heel on his forehead.  “Why...I don’t understand…”

 

_Little brother._ Victor, realizing that Yuuri was back in Sochi,  directed the others to back off and he slipped his arms around Yuuri and cradled him to his chest.  “I didn’t think...Yuuri, are you okay?”

 

Yuuri blinked at him in surprise and then realized how Victor was holding him.  Glancing around he then ducked his chin down, his eyes downcast.  “I’m okay...I just...I never remembered that before.”

 

The other two cautiously approached the bed but when Yuuri looked up at them, his expression was open.  It was Chris that reached out cautiously.  “We didn’t mean to scare you,” he murmured.

 

“You didn’t.  It wasn’t...like when I run and hide.  I know I’m safe with you three.  I just...it made me remember something.”  He turned to Victor and asked, “Do you think I should tell Nikolai?”

 

“He’s checking in with us this evening after he gets his team organized.”

 

“He’s here?” Phichit asked.

 

“Yes.  He’s heading the team on site.  He wanted to be here in case things went wrong.  He’s concerned about the messages that we’ve both received.  And well...in a way it’s been a year since…”

 

Yuuri shuddered.  “That’s one anniversary I do not want to celebrate.  I...can’t believe it’s been a year.  My life is so different now.”

 

Chris leveled a gaze upon his lover.  “If Interpol is taking it seriously, then you should.  No unnecessary risks.”

 

Phichit lifted his gray eyes to meet hazel and tightened his smile.  “I’ll stay with you, Yuuri, or my coaches.  Okay?”

 

Chris nodded.  “Please.  I want to know you are okay.”

 

Phichit’s lip pouted a moment and Yuuri watched his friend quiver a moment.  Taking the Thai man’s hand, he pulled him up beside him.  “Why don’t the two of you get dinner and come back here while I catch up with Phichit?” he suggested.

 

As they left, Phichit snuggled into Yuuri’s protective embrace.  “I fucked up,” he whispered.  “Chris doesn’t trust me.”

 

“You can get that back if you want it.  He still loves you.”

 

“I know.  I just...it’s all so mixed up.  And it’s worse since those stupid pictures.  Seung-gil sends me messages checking up on me and they always seem to happen during a facetime call with Chris.  Then Chris gets all quiet.  I don’t want to hurt anyone, Yuuri.”

 

“Do you know what you want?”

 

“I think...I do.  I just have to figure out how to fix all this.”  Phichit snuggled into Yuuri and the older man heard the younger man sniff.  “I don’t know how to be taken care of, Yuuri.  I always looked out for everyone else.  And somehow I managed to stay carefree.  I can’t...do that anymore.  But...sometimes I just need to be me.”

 

“You should never sacrifice who you are to be with someone...or without them,” Yuuri assured him.

 

Phichit sniffed, pulling back and clearing the tears from his eyes.  “I’m trying to be a good person, Yuuri.  I know I made you mad, too.  You don’t have to hide it.”

 

Yuuri frowned.  “I wasn’t...mad.  A little...exasperated.  Because I love you and I want you safe.  We all want you safe.  We all want you to be careful.  Even Chris and Seung-gil.”

 

Phichit drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly.  He let out a half-hearted laugh.  “This isn’t the way we do things.  I’m supposed to take care of you.”

 

“It’s okay for the roles to reverse.  I’m becoming stronger now.  Being with Victor...I think that’s good for me.  He pushes me to be better.  I’m still myself...just stronger.  He says I do the same for him.”

 

“Is that how it’s supposed to work?  I don’t think...I’ve tried to be better.  I think...I’ve been acting like a child.  Selfish and not thinking about Chris...or Seung-gil.”

 

Yuuri reached out and smoothed his friend’s hair, his brown eyes gentle.  “It’s not too late to be better.  You are young and are going to make mistakes.”

 

“But it’s mistakes, I knew better, Yuuri,” he huffed.  “If the roles were reversed and you were doing the things that I did, I would have told you all the things that you said to me...and probably more.”

 

Yuuri couldn’t help the small smile touching his lips.  “Perhaps we are each stubborn in our own way.  It’s good that we are close enough to call each other out.”  A buzz on his phone caught Yuuri’s attention.  He glanced down then raised an eyebrow.  “The boys are coming back and I don’t think anything they are bringing is on our diet.”

 

“Good!  I’m tired of my diet.  I want...comfort food.”

 

They arrived with food that wasn’t too far off base.  The garlic chicken, or [_pollo al ajillo_](https://www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/Garlic-Chicken-354571) _,_ was accompanied with several small dishes to share called _tapas_.  Yuuri found himself enjoying the wrinkled potatoes called [_canarian papas arrugadas_](http://spanishsabores.com/2015/07/16/canarian-papas-arrugadas-recipe/).  Well, maybe a little off their diet.  But the portions were small, so they decided it was an acceptable break.

 

Yuuri was reluctant to release his friend and they finally decided to wrap up the night in a nest of pillows and blankets.  “It’s been awhile since we’ve done this,” Chris commented, his chin resting on his hands as he watched the two younger man curled up together with a soft smile.

 

“It has,” Victor agreed then raised an eyebrow.  “We are  _ not  _ watching  _ The King and the Skater _ , Phichit.”

 

“Yuuuriii, Victor’s ruining my fun,” he whined snuggling up to Yuuri for affect.

 

Yuuri laughed.  “Don’t make me choose between you and my...fiance…”

 

Phichit sat up and pouted.  “Fine.  What did you bring?” he asked pointedly looking at the other three men.  Chris produced  [ _ Beautiful Something _ ](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3212408/) .  Yuuri tossed  [ _ The Martian _ ](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3659388/?ref_=adv_li_tt) down and received some raised eyebrows and nods of approval from the other men.  Victor reached into his laptop bag and pulled free  [ _ Eat Pray Love _ ](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0879870/) .  Phichit raised an eyebrow at their offerings.  “We are all in very different places cinematically.  There’s only one way to resolve this.  Yuuri?”

 

“Yes, Phi,” Yuuri sat up sharply.

 

“Ready the  _ Golden Girls _ equalizer.”  Both men leveled stares at Victor whose cheeks went pink.  “It’s time to force someone out of the closet.”

 

“I-” Victor began.

 

“No excuses.  You’ve been caught.  This means...a marathon of _ Golden Girls _ greats that includes an analysis of each episode.  Are you prepared?”

 

Yuuri leaned forward and murmured, “I should warn you.  Phichit could write a dissertation on  _ Golden Girls _ and how it epitomized 80s life and the fears of that era.”

 

“Oh...I guess…”

 

The other three men leaned in and in unison sang, “Thank you for being a friend…”  The evening was decided.


	38. Chapter 38

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victor has Yuuri dress up after practice, the outfit laid out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much to Blu and Mags! Love all that you do for me.

* * *

 

 

At practice, Yakov called Yuuri and Victor to the side.  “Nikolai is here and wishes to speak with you for a few moments.”  The old coach stepped aside and revealed the younger, harder lines of working against crime.

 

“Hello, gentlemen.  I don’t want to keep you long.  I and my men will be dressed similarly.  Dark suits.  Our ISU badge will say SE-S for security special services.  It’s what they typically issue to law enforcement to allow for ease of movement within these events.”  Nikolai showed them the ISU badge as well as the cuff that would go on his arm.  “If you see anything at all, contact myself or one of my men.  We will have an earpiece linking us together.  We want you to feel safe and we’ll be scattered throughout the crowd and auditorium.”

 

“Thank you, Nikolai.  What you said last night...you think they are here?” Victor asked.

 

“Yes.  That information you gave us last night, Katsuki, could solidify it for us.  Our suspects...their mother was a figure skater many years ago.  Yakov might know her.  Irena Sokolova.  When she married her first husband, she had two sons.  She then abandoned her family and married a Japanese businessman where she had a third son.  He competed for a time as a figure skater but has since retired.  Never went internationally.  However, we think the first two sons see you as a surrogate for the third.”

 

“So...this is because they hate their younger brother?” Yuuri asked quietly.

 

“It appears so.  They resented their mother for leaving them behind.  I don’t think their father was a good man.  She’s passed on.  I don’t think the brother is alive, either.  We haven’t located him through our resources.  This is just a theory, but they match the description and images we’ve captured.  This all came together over the last week and your information seemed to cinch it.”

 

“What about the third person?”

 

“We think a cousin...he’s a computer hacker and we think he’s been helping to provide false IDs and covering their passage into various countries.  Your attackers aren’t the only clients, but as you think they were in contact with this person during the crime that is something new.”

 

“So we just have to find them,” Yuuri surmised.

 

“No.   _We_ have to find them.   _You_ have to skate and stay safe.  Don’t do anything unnecessarily risky, and stay in groups.  That seems to be an effective deterrent.”

 

“We will,” Victor assured him.  “I’ve made it a priority to keep Yuuri safe.” Nikolai nodded, somewhat satisfied, before walking off and leaving the two skaters.  They returned to the ice and practice, listening for Yakov’s voice as he barked out last minute corrections.

 

* * *

  


In their room, Yuuri showered first and Victor busied himself laying out their clothes for the evening.  When Yuuri came back into their room, his eyebrows shot up.  “What are you up to?”

 

“I thought I’d take us out to someplace nice,” he answered with a smile, stepping into his lover’s space and brushing his lips over Yuuri’s.  “Can a man take the love of his life out without all of this suspicion?”

 

Yuuri frowned, suspicious nonetheless, and responded, “I suppose.”  He stepped towards the suit.  Well, tux, really.  “You have ballet tickets!” he guessed, turning a side glance towards Victor.  Victor only laughed as he disappeared into the bathroom.

 

An hour later they were dressed and Victor put Yuuri’s hair in order.  “You are so beautiful, my Yuuri,” he murmured staring at the man in the mirror.  “I hope you know how much I love you.”

 

“You find so many ways to tell me, Vitya, how could I not?” he answered the reflection.

 

Victor stepped back and offered his elbow.  “Are you ready?”

 

“I don’t know.  Am I?” he smirked.  “I mean, you are the one with the mysterious plans.”

 

Victor guided Yuuri out in the hallway where they were joined by Phichit and Chris also dressed up.  Yuuri took in their attire and muttered, “I suspect I’m the only one in the dark tonight.”

 

“Trust me, Yuuri,” Victor answered lifting his hand up to brush a kiss over his fingers.

 

They walked down through the Christmas markets, slow and meandering.  Yuuri kept glancing Victor’s direction, his eyes curious.  Victor was playful, grabbing Yuuri’s hand and tugging him along for this adventure.  Then as he stepped towards the steps of a beautiful church, Yuuri smiled, enchanted by the lights, the music filtering through the door into the square.  He missed the nod Victor gave to Chris...and others.  Until he turned with a start as Chris laid out a handkerchief with ceremony before them.

 

“Merely seeing to my duty,” he responded to the questioning gaze before stepping back.

 

Then Yuuri’s lips parted as Victor dropped down on one knee and took his hand.  “My beautiful Yuuri, I know we’ve already decided to spend the rest of our lives together, that we are for all intents and purposes engaged.  However, I want to formally ask you before all of these witnesses for your hand in marriage.”

 

It was then that Yuuri looked around and realized that a small group was surrounding him.  And he saw...his mother, his sister, his father, Minako, Yuuko, Takeshi.  And the first tears started to fall.  “Vitya...what have you done?”  Victor handed him a handkerchief, pressed and white.  As Yuuri pulled it up he saw the monogramme.  K~N.  “Vitya?”

 

“We’re all waiting for your answer, love.  Will you marry me?”

 

He glanced around as others drew closer and he saw...Ciao Ciao, Yakov, Lilia, Natalia, Ashley, Mila, Yuri.  Soft smiles on their faces.  And then he realized they had candles, slim and white as they slowly shared the flame in a small half circle.  Oh, and there were others.  Seung-gil...did he come here for this?  Otabek moved over to Yuri and the older man once more wondered about their friendship.  Ivan and Dmitry holding stepped closer holding Makka’s leash.  Makka was here!  Even JJ and his fiance were there.  A few others he couldn’t make out through his tears.  Looking at Victor, his hand shook, waving towards his face, overwhelmed.  “Vitya?”

 

“My beautiful Yuuri…”  The man he loved watched him expectantly.  Yuuri had to answer.

 

“I-” glancing around, he felt Victor’s hand cradle his chin.

 

“Focus on me, love,” he directed gently.

 

“I-I love you...I can’t believe you did this.  Of course I’ll marry you,” Yuuri rushed once he got past the first word.

 

“Now?”

 

“Now?”  Yuuri’s eyes widened as he heard the first strains of Canon in D playing.  “Now.  Oh, my god, Victor.  Yes!  Yes, I’ll marry you now!”

 

Victor smiled as he stood, taking Yuuri’s hand in his and guiding him towards the officiate.  With a nod, the official began.  “Dearly beloved, we are gathered here to join these two men…”  The words went in a blur and Yuuri heard himself say “I do” and repeat vows.  Victor held his eyes and hand as he stated the words back to him, emphasizing every word.  Then the rings and Victor thought of everything.  Yuuri’s hand shook as Victor slid the ring in place.  His hand shook as he slid the ring onto Victor’s slender finger.  Then it was announced that they were married.  The crowd cried out congratulations in so many languages.  His mother was crying.  His sister was even crying.  And...he was married.  To Victor.  His idol.  His anchor.  His lifeline.

 

As they were announced, they were swept up on a crowd of well wishers.  Victor led them to the restaurant where he had arranged for a reception and Yuuri found himself surrounded by loved ones.

 

“My dear sweet son,” his mother approached, wrapping him in her arms.  “I knew when you found each other that it was just a matter of time.”  Her hand graced his cheeks.

 

“I can’t believe you are here.  What about the onsen?”

 

“We have friends watching it.  How could we miss this, your special day?  And Victor made sure we could see you both skate.”

 

“I can’t believe you are all here.”

 

“Well, believe it, son,” his father responded patting his shoulder warmly.

 

His sister found him a few moments later.  “I can’t believe you bagged your man,” she teased.

 

“He...I don’t even have words to describe what I’m feeling.”

 

She laughed.  “He’s a good guy.  I’m happy for you.”

 

Ashley and Natalia showed up as he stood next to Victor as they toasted glasses of sparkling grape juice.  “You are such a hopeless romantic!” Nattie teased.

 

“You knew that when I showed up in Detroit,” Victor returned easily.

 

Ashley knelt down and looked Cocoa over.  “It looks like she’s been taking good care of you, Yuuri,” she commented.

 

“Of course.  She had the best of trainers.”

 

“You were involved in that training process,” Ashley pointed out.

 

JJ Leroy and Isabella Yang came up to the couple as they mingled.  “What a lovely, impromptu little affair,” Isabella commented.

 

Victor laughed.  “It was anything but impromptu.  I’ve been planning this for weeks.  Yuuri just didn’t know it.”

 

“I was very much surprised,” Yuuri murmured.

 

JJ smirked.  “This isn’t exactly JJ style, but certainly screams Victor Nikiforov.  Nicely done.”

 

“Thank you,” Victor responded graciously.

 

Later, Yuuri bumped into Minako and Lilia.  “I understand you’ve been working in Lilia’s studio,” his old teacher stated.

 

“I don’t mind helping Madame Lilia out and well, it helps to learn different studio management styles.”

 

“You know how much I appreciate your assistance, Yuuri,” Lilia stated warmly.  “You’ve been an asset since you joined us in Russia.”

 

Yuuri blushed, his chin dipping down.  “I’m just thankful you’ve all accepted me.  I fit in much better than I thought I would.”

 

“Oh, Yuuri,” Minako teased.  “You will never see your true value, despite how your husband showers you with it.”

 

“That’s different.”

 

“Yes, and no,” Lilia countered.  “We all saw your worth as you moved up the ranks.  I am glad to see that you are finally accepting some of it, if not all of it.  A dancer should always dance with confidence and grace.”

 

Victor found himself surrounded by his Russian teammates.  “You pulled it off,” Dmitry stated wryly.

 

“I didn’t know if you’d manage it all but I should have remembered your stubborn determination,” Ivan added.

 

Yuri scoffed.  “I can’t believe you talked Katsudon into it.  Twice!”  He shook his head and rolled his eyes before moving off to talk to Otabek.

 

Yakov moved towards him as the others pulled away.  “Don’t blow this, Vitya.  And don’t let it affect your skate.”

 

Victor grinned.  “Always the coach, Yakov.  Trust me.  I know what is important.”

 

The two grooms waved at the lot as they approached the door.  Victor knew Yuuri was tired.  Too many people wore on him.  They left in a shower of well wishes and glitter and slipped out into the night, a horse drawn carriage meeting them at the door.

 

“Vitya, really?” Yuuri responded as his husband handed him up.  Victor followed and settled in next to him.

 

“Nothing but the best for my husband,” he promised.  The driver settled a blanket over their laps before steering the carriage out into traffic.

 

Yuuri, despite his protests, curled up around Victor’s arm and sighed as he rested his head against his shoulder.  “Thank you for loving me,” he murmured.  “I would have...become overwhelmed planning this.”

 

“I thought as much and well, I wanted to replace bad memories with good.”

 

“It worked,” Yuuri responded with a smile.

 

“Now for the honeymoon, it will have to wait.”

 

“I know.  Competition obligations.  We can at least snuggle in our room.”

 

“Maybe a little more than snuggle but when the final is over, I do plan to properly make love to you.”

 

Yuuri smiled up at him.  “I’m counting on it.”

 

* * *

  
  


At their door, Victor unlocked it before turning to Yuuri and taking his hand.  Brushing his lips over the other man’s fingers, he murmured, “My husband.”  Yuuri felt suddenly overwhelmed and blinked back tears even as Victor pulled him into his embrace, brushing his lips over the younger man’s.

 

“I still can’t believe we’re married,” Yuuri whispered with a bit of wonder.  He rested his head on Victor’s shoulder and they fell into step with a waltz playing in their heads timed to the beat of their hearts.  

 

“I have the proof in my pocket.  Your signature and mine.”

 

“Of course it’s in Spanish,” Yuuri teased peeking up from where his cheek rested.

 

A soft chuckle vibrated out of Victor.  “I’ll have it translated into every language we know...Russian, Japanese, English, and French.  Then you’ll have the proof.”

 

“It won’t be recognized everywhere...does it matter?”

 

“To us it matters,” Victor murmured.  “And that’s what counts.  I am your husband and you are mine.”

 

Yuuri pulled back to look into Victor’s eyes.  “I like the sound of that.  Husband.  Vitya, I am still astounded that you want me.  It’s never been a question about me being yours.  I was yours from that first moment I laid eyes on you.  But that you’d want to be mine…” he trailed off, his fingers tracing down the side of his husband’s face.

 

“I am equally amazed that you want me, Yuuri.  I...know that I try people’s patience.”

 

“Vitya,” he whispered.  Their lips met once more, tenderly exploring one another’s mouths.  When they parted, Yuuri took a ragged breath.  “Let’s get these jackets hung before they are crushed.”  Then, as familiar lovers, they undressed with care, hanging their clothes, sharing glances of tender desire.  When they returned to one another, only their boxers and briefs separated them.  

 

“Yuuriiii…” Victor breathed into the kiss.  As they danced in one another’s arms towards the bed, the paused next to it.  

 

Yuuri peered up at him and tilted his head in the direction of the bed.  “How do you want to do this since we are both skating?”

 

“I want to feel those thighs of yours,” Victor stated firmly.  Yuuri laughed breathily in response which did things to him.  He moaned as he melted into another kiss, feeling Yuuri’s hands tangling into his hair.  “My beautiful Yuuri,” he whispered as the kiss broke.  Soft brown eyes looked up at him in soft adoration.  “So very beautiful.”

 

Yuuri’s fingers brushed down his side sliding over the curve of his ass.  Yuuri dipped down and traced a line of kisses along his collarbone, lingering in that valley in the center before moving down.  He captured one nipple with his lips as Victor’s fingers knotted into his dark hair.  Tracing his tongue around the pink edge he then sucked it in and Victor did not disappoint him with the moan he offered.  

 

Yuuri continued his journey downward as he sat on the mattress before Victor.  The older man stood in the part of his legs as Yuuri teased and tormented him, his tongue tracing the sharp turn of his hipbones.  His fingers eased the briefs down his hips as he nestled into the trimmed hair next to his length sucking into the skin.  Hiis tongue traced up the vein to the crown, the older man releasing a long moan.  His tongue slipped around the inside of the foreskin before tracing up the slit.  Victor responded with a gasp and tightening his hold in Yuuri’s hair.  Yuuri slowly opened his mouth to accept the tip before sucking his hardened length down in intervals.  Long fingers raked through his hair.  

 

Yuuri came off of him with a pop and Victor looked down to hold his eyes.  “Scoot back,” he commanded, his voice shaky.  Yuuri used the heel of his foot to push him back and Victor followed him, reaching for his boxers, sliding them off as the younger man moved away.  Victor then straddled his lover’s thighs as he reached for the lubricant he had laid out for the night.  Yuuri’s eyes watched Victor as he slicked up the length then closed his eyes as he felt those hands part his thighs to add more lubrication.  Pressing those legs together he glanced those fingers up his outer thighs and then sides and gathered him to his chest.  Victor felt the friction and squeeze of Yuuri around him as he pressed between his thighs.  Yuuri’s teeth bit into his lower lip as he felt Victor’s fingers tighten in pleasure.

 

His lips found Yuuri’s and became sloppy in their kisses as Yuuri held his thighs together, pleasuring Victor’s thrusts.  The silverette found Yuuri’s shaft, hand still slick from Yuuri’s thighs and began teasing down the length in time with his thrusts.  Victor’s release came quickly, his body shaking as he spilled down those thighs.  He continued to kiss Yuuri as he rode through his orgasm.

 

He broke the kiss, his eyes sparkling and moved down Yuuri’s body.  Yuuri’s lips parted in a gasp as Victor took him into his mouth and swallowed him down in one steady suck.  “Shit, Vitya!”  He could feel Victor’s laugh vibrate through him as Victor pulled back.  His movements were quick and efficient, Yuuri’s eyes blinking rapidly in his release.  

 

As Victor gulped down his release he looked up with a wink.  “I think that’s as quick and dirty as we’ve ever gone,” he laughed.

 

“I guess that’s how it is once you’re married.”

 

Victor grinned.  “Next thing you know, you’ll let yourself go.”

 

“You’d love me all pudgy and soft.”

 

Victor’s expression sobered, his smile softened.  “I would, you know.”

 

Yuuri’s eyes widened.  “God, Vitya!  I can’t be pudgy and skate.”

 

“No...but after.  I’d love to snuggle up to your soft pudge.  You’ll always be beautiful to me.”

 

Yuuri gave Victor a playful shove.  “You goof!”  But his eyes smiled tenderly, that acceptance of his body in all forms causing his heart to tighten.  He glanced down at the mess near his thighs.  “I suppose I should shower.”

 

“We can shower together, _lyubov moya_.  I’m not ready to let my new husband out of sight.”

 

“You’re a sap, you know!”

 

“You knew that when you married me.”

 

They disappeared into the bathroom, fingers tangled together.  The night was spent snuggled into one another as they drifted off into peaceful sleep.  

  
  


_______

AUTHOR’S NOTES:

 

Yuuri’s [ tux ](http://s3.weddbook.com/t4/2/0/6/2060959/stylish-custom-suits-by-indochino-grooms-fashion-pinterest.jpg).

 

Victor’s [ tux ](https://i.pinimg.com/236x/74/d8/6c/74d86c9d9b3d156b8a72481118cd940d--man-suit-wedding-wedding-tuxedos.jpg).

 

So, technically it could take up to 45 days and lots of paperwork to get married in Spain.  At least, if you’re a U.S. citizen.  So I used a little writerly magic and made it happen.  I’m including the links to my sources for the curious at heart...one that’s “totally valid” and one that’s perhaps a little more valid.  ;)

 

[ Getting Married in Spain (HuffPost) ](http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/02/09/getting-married-in-spain_n_1265772.html)

 

[ Getting Married in Spain:  Marriage and Partnerships in Spain ](https://www.expatica.com/es/family-essentials/Weddings-in-Spain-Getting-married-in-Spain_102734.html)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well...who figured it out ahead of time?


	39. Chapter 39

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grand Prix Final...so much is happening this chapter.
> 
>  
> 
> NOTE: I screwed up the lineup for this event but it’s been corrected in Ch. 33. JJ, Yu(u)ris, Chris, Phichit, and Victor are competing. Otabek, like Sueng-gil, is in Barcelona to support his friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My apologies for the mix up earlier...what can I say? I apparently mixed up my stories a little. A person or two said something about Phichit not going to the Final and I was like, wait...what? And it took a bit for me to fix it. So all done. 
> 
> Thanks so much to BluSkates and Magrathea for the reads. Things are going to be fun! ;)

* * *

 

 

 

Victor wrapped Yuuri up in his arms from behind as they watched Phichit skate.  Chris would be next.  Almost lost in the din of the background noise, Viktor could hear JJ running his mouth.   _ If that were a sport you could finally medal.   _ The draws had Yuuri following Chris.  In the second run, it was Yuri, JJ, then Victor.  It didn’t bother Victor to go last.  He wasn’t as affected by placement as his Yuuri.  The Japanese skater always seemed to do better when buried in the middle.

 

He could see Chris keeping an eye out for Phichit in the ceiling mounted monitor while he warmed up.  “I want to watch you and Yuri out on the rink,” Victor murmured in his husband’s ear.

 

“Are you at all concerned about JJ?” The younger man whispered under his breath.

 

Victor chuckled throatily.  “When he breaks one of my records, I’ll worry.”  He leaned forward and brushed a kiss behind Yuuri’s ear sending a shiver down the younger man’s spine.  “I’m more worried about you and your stamina.  And a bit worried about the kitten.”

 

“We’re all worried about the kitten,” Yuuri confessed.  “Except JJ...but that’s his arrogance.”

 

“Pride goeth before the fall,” Victor pronounced.

 

Yuuri nodded but frowned.   For him, it had never been pride that lead to the fall… well, falls.  It had always been self doubt.  But with Victor, he felt much more grounded.  Even with everything going on, he felt more secure.

 

Chris left and Yuuri and Victor weren’t too far behind, Yuuri transferring Makkachin’s lead back to Victor so he could focus on Cocoa’s.  They watched Phichit finish up underneath the rain of hamsters souring onto the ice.  Victor watched Phichit lean into Chris as the older man whispered into his ear.  A smile erupted into a laugh and he said something back to him.  Victor tightened his arms around Yuuri.  “Do you think the Seung-gil business is over?”

 

“I don’t know.  I saw them this morning when we were getting breakfast and he was definitely flirting.  I just hope he decides soon.  The longer he waits, the more likely someone will get hurt.”

 

“I don’t think I’d have been as patient if it had been you.”

 

“I’m demisexual.  You wouldn’t have to worry about it being me.  I need to connect with someone on a close, emotional level.”

 

Victor tightened his hold on Yuuri.  “I just know I love you and I only want to be with you.”

 

Phichit’s scores were announced, revealing a personal best for the Thai skater.  “He’s steadily improving.”

 

Chris settled into his opening position.  Yuuri leaned into Victor and murmured, “Just remember...my eros is just for you.”

 

Victor shivered and tightened his embrace as the other skater launched into  _ Intoxicated _ .  “At least they don’t have to clean the ice after you skate.”

 

Yuuri chuckled lowly.  “We’ll see.”

 

Phichit joined them with Seung-gil hovering close.  “Just because you’re not skating doesn’t mean you are safe,” the Thai skater argued.  “Just stay with the group.”

 

Yuuri glanced up and stated, “He’s right, you know.  Otabek is hanging close to Yuri.  You should find people to hang close to as well.”

 

“Otabek is staying close to Yuri to keep  _ him  _ safe,” the Korean argued.

 

“Then find someone to keep safe but don’t stand alone,” Yuuri argued.

 

“Perhaps you can help us juggle Makka and Cocoa during these events,” Victor offered knowing Seung-gil was more comfortable with four-legged friends.

 

The expression of appreciation barely registered but the younger man nodded in agreement.  “I could help out with that.”  He knelt down and acquainted himself with Makkachin who accepted him almost immediately, sensing the dog lover in him.  Cocoa remembered him but she was working and didn’t interact openly.

 

Yuuri approached the barrier door as Chris wrapped up, reaching back to hand off Cocoa’s lead.  A pair of warm hands covered his and he glanced back to see Seung-gil taking his duty most seriously.  “Thank you.  Stay close to the others.”

 

The Korean nodded.  “We’ll be here when you come off the ice.”

 

Phichit was dragged along with Chris and Yuuri watched an imperceptible smile touch the Korean’s lips.  He glanced up to see if Victor caught it.  A long finger tapping thoughtfully on the silverette’s lips answered him.  Yuuri turned and took a lap around the ice.  When he approached Victor, he knew the man’s focus was on him.  He was thankful that Seung-gil chose to stay near Victor during this time.

 

Leaning into Victor’s space, he focused on his husband.  “They may watch but I only dance for you,” Yuuri murmured.

 

“My eyes are only for you, my Yuuri.  Show me your beauty.”

 

Yuuri tipped up his chin and received a brush of lips.  As he skated to his starting position, he turned to face Victor.  He lifted up his ring finger and kissed it and Victor did the same in answer.  The announcers picked up on the action and speculation began to spread through the press.  Yuuri ignored it.  His thoughts were only for his husband.

 

The flirtatious start seemed to charge the air with a promise.   _ Oh, my Victor.  The mere idea of being with anyone but you...you silly man.  How could I?  I belong only to you.  _  He teased towards Victor with his set up and then launched into his first jump.   _ You, my partner, my lover, my knight, and my husband.  You, who caught my eye so long ago and never parted from it.  I only ever wanted you.  _  His spin wrapped up facing Victor and he turned into a flirty step sequence that highlighted Yuuri’s thighs and ass.   _ I love how you love all of me but that doesn’t stop me from wanting to tease and entice you.  I don’t care who sees...I’m yours...and you are mine. _

 

Yuuri faced his Victor as he finished up and the older man held his eyes across the arena.  He took his bows before heading directly to the kiss and cry.  Victor reached for him as he exited the ice, guards slapping onto his blades.  He smiled in appreciation as Seung-gil handed over Cocoa’s lead.  As he settled next to Victor, he leaned in to pet Cocoa and calm his nerves.  “I touched down on that last quad.”

 

“You were beautiful,” Victor assured him.

 

Yuuri leveled a gaze at Victor.  “You are biased.  I doubt I’ll break a hundred.”  He did, though.  His score of 107.69 wasn’t his highest short program score but it was a strong beginning.

 

“See what I mean?”

 

“But…”   
  


“Trust me.  I may be biased, but I already knew you broke a hundred.”

 

There was small talk as the zamboni resurfaced the ice.  Yuri Plisetsky was next and the first group of skaters crowded around the boards to watch him.  Yuuri looked up to see Otabek standing at his right side.  Phichit stood at his left with Victor wrapped around him from behind.  Chris stood behind Phichit with a hand resting loosely on the younger skater’s hip.  Seung-gil rounded out the end.  Two dogs stood on either side of Yuuri squeezed in between friends.  They called out “davai” as Yuri turned their direction.  The teen rolled his eyes then stuck out his tongue receiving laughter in response.

 

The haunting tones of  _ Agape  _ filled the arena and they watched in rapt captivation.  The teen grabbed every bit of teaching from his mentors and coach and applied it to this program.  Yuuri worked with his emotional expression.  Victor helped him perfect his technical.  Yakov pushed him to pull it all together.  The result...was breathtaking.  Victor exchanged glances with Yuuri as the younger man finished.  The audience gave him a standing ovation.

 

He came off the ice breathless and listened to Yakov as the old coach gave him his critique.  He glanced up as Otabek approached and offered a small smile but then trained his eyes onto the scoreboard, his nerves on edge.  Then, his green eyes widened in shock.  He glanced towards Victor who studied him with a narrowed gaze.  The old man wouldn’t hold it against him.  He knew it.  But he recognized Yuri as a challenge even at fifteen.  Yuri stood up at his full height, chin held high in challenge.  At least for the moment, he held the world record.

 

JJ must have been unnerved by the kitten’s accomplishment because he skate was full of flubs and falls.  Yuuri winced as he watched the Canadian bite the ice jump after jump, and even coming out of a backspin.  But he had to admire the way the other man kept pushing.  He finished his program in the mid 80s.

 

The final skate for men’s single short programs belonged to Victor.  However, the audience was buzzing with the blond’s world record.  Victor leaned into Yuuri’s space at the boards and murmured, “It’s always about you.”

 

From his position, he heard the music to the instrumental version of  _ Photograph  _ remembering their life.  So many things happened over the year and he couldn’t believe he would have a lifetime to build more memories.  He focused on the positive memories, the way Yuuri danced into his life a year ago, the first time Yuuri found his words, sharing a bed with Yuuri, their first kiss, the many times they danced through their emotions, Yuuri on pointe, Yuuri skating for him, how they found their way slowly across a landscape of intimacy, heels, dresses, walking in on Yuuri in just an apron as he prepared supper, Yuuri’s stumble through the interview that led to their initial engagement, and then their wedding.  Yuuri...his husband...who watched him from the boards with a look of adoration.  Through all the bad, so much good filled their world.  As he rejoined his lover, he didn’t even notice the audience.  He smiled as his score posted at 109.32.  Let the blond enjoy his triumph as a world record holder.  He had his prize.

 

* * *

  
  
  


The final three waited for their turn on the ice.  Yuri was eager as he looked at the other two holding the top score at the close of the short program.  The older Yuuri would be on the ice first out of their group.  The younger Yuri decided to stand close to Victor.  It was strange to compete against those who felt so close to him.  Yet, he knew they would want him to go all out.  Victor never made it easy on him and neither did the Japanese Yuuri.

 

Yuuri settled into position to start his skate for  _ Yuuri on Ice _ .  He wanted that gold.  But more than anything, he wanted to skate a story that showed the love he experienced over his skating career.  A violin teased the edges of the piano music.  Yuuri smiled as he skated thinking about how Victor had always been a part of him.  Even in his youth, younger than Yuri was now, he knew he was drawn to the older man.  He remembered the swish of long silver hair that captivated him in his youth.  He climbed for so long up a ragged path, falling and tripping his way up the hill.

 

Until…

 

Everything came crashing down.

 

Until…

 

He couldn’t reach anymore.

 

Only…

 

Victor saw him, reached back to him, grabbed hold of him, and pulled him out of his despair.   He showed him love in ways he never imagined, patient, self-sacrificing, always reaching for him and giving to him.  He encouraged him to be himself even when it involved heels, dresses, and pointe shoes.  He celebrated his triumphs.  He mourned his losses with him but always with a note of positivity.  Victor helped him to strive to be better.  And now, he was better.

 

He wrapped up his skate, his eyes resting on Victor, a smile touching his lips.  Skating across the ice, he was halfway there when he realized that he had a standing ovation.  What happened?  Victor was grinning even as he was waiting to go onto the ice.  Lilia would keep him company in kiss and cry.  His friends would hover nearby.

 

Victor’s fingers stroked down the side of his face as he murmured, “I am so proud of you.”

 

He still didn’t understand.  Yakov talked to Victor and then his husband was taking his position on the ice.  That’s when he heard it.  He looked up at Lilia in disbelief.  “H-how?”

 

“You’re a beautiful skater, Yuuri Katsuki, just as you are a beautiful dancer.  How could you not?” the Russian ballet teacher stated matter-of-factly.

 

**221.91**

 

His total ended at 329.6.

 

Not only taking the free skate record but the combined total world record.

 

Yuuri was shaking as he took the water bottle.

 

Victor kissed his ring and waved proudly towards his partner.  Yuuri kissed his ring in reply.  Victor’s story began as the sad tones of  _ Sparrow  _ rang out.  Yuuri knew the skate and knew it was about sorrow and overcoming that sorrow.  He knew it was as much about him as it was about Victor.  There lives were so entangled, how could it not?  He didn’t know that Victor was going to throw in a fifth quad and his eyes shot to Yakov in surprise who smiled conspiratorially towards the older skater.  Yakov would say “there’s still fight left in the old boy.”

 

He never expected Victor to make it easy on him.  He wouldn’t want that.  He always wanted to beat Victor on his own terms.  And he knew Victor respected that.  He also knew Victor lived for the surprise and the audience response told him that surprise was not lost.

 

Victor joined him in the kiss and cry with a grin.  “Did you see that?”

 

Yuuri laughed.  “Of course you’d put in a fifth quad.  You know that means I’ll be working towards the same.”

 

“I look forward to it.”

 

Yuuri didn’t hold the overall world record long.  Victor finished at 220.42 on his free skate and reclaimed the world record at 329.74.  They now waited for Yuri.

 

The blond made his entrance with fire and ice, skating to  _ Allegro Appassionato _ .  The youngest skater pushed hard with all he had but fell short with a score of 210.83, finishing up at 329.39.  He would be third.  Both Victor and Yuuri greeted him warmly and he wasn’t sure how to respond.  He...was upset he didn’t pull off those final tenths of a point to beat the other two men but he had to respect their skates.

 

The closeness of the scores drove the crowds wild.  Victor stood at the top of the podium with gold but with Yuri taking his record on short program with a skate he choreographed and Yuuri taking the free skate with one that he helped choreograph, he felt like he won all three tiers in a way.  He hugged Yuri to his side, the current bronze medal holder.  He wrapped his other arm around Yuuri leaning over to kiss him.  Silver.  His emotions were overwhelming him and the cameras were eating it up.  Teary eyed Victor so proud of the two men sharing the podium with him would make for great reporting.

 

Yuri stepped down and looked at the other two men in determination.  “I’m kicking your ass at Worlds,” he stated with passion.

 

Victor laughed.  “I look forward to it.”

 

“You’ll have to get past me,” Yuuri stated with determination.

 

* * *

  
  


With all of the record exchanges, the crowd and press turned in a maddening frenzy.  Phichit, who somehow ended up as Makkachin’s keeper, stood still trying to get his bearings in the chaos.  He looked at his phone.

 

**Chris/ I can’t see you.  Where are you?**

 

**Seung-gil/ Are you with Chris?**

 

He didn’t have either of them and he felt uneasy.  He sent a text back to Chris and Seung-gil.

 

**EvilHamsterLord/ I’m near the stands by the kiss and cry.  I can’t find either of you.**

 

Their conversation converged.

 

**Chris/ Stay still and among people.**

 

**Seung-gil/ On our way.  Do you still have Makkachin?**

 

Phichit tightened his hand on the lead.

 

**EvilHamsterLord/ Yes.  I have Makka.**

 

**Seung-gil/ Remember Yuuri said she can guard.  Do you know the command?**

 

Oh, that’s right.  Makka helped guard Yuuri the night Sasha attacked.

 

**EvilHamsterLord/ I think so.**

 

It all happened so fast and all of the sudden he was pushed by the crowd.  His phone toppled out of his hand but he held tight to the lead.  “Makka!” he called out.  The dog barked and drew close to him.  And then he felt the hands on his shoulder smelling a cheap cologne and sweat like Yuuri described.  His blood ran cold and he cried out in panic.  “Guard!”  And Makka didn’t back down.  Growling and barking that must have alerted his friends where he was located.  Soon he had Chris and Seung-gil in front of him and the other men were retreating.

 

Chris wanted to go after him but felt a restraining hand on his shoulder.  He turned back to see the Korean.  “Yuuri wouldn’t want you to put yourself at risk.  Besides, he needs you.”  Seung-gil nodded towards Phichit who stood shaken, his smile shattered and tears sliding down his cheeks.

 

Chris immediately scooped him into his embrace and he felt the small form collapse against him.  “Shhh...I’ve got you, mon cher.  It’s okay.”

 

Seung-gil alerted security and knelt down to calm Makka.  He then called Yuuri.

 

* * *

  
  


It took some time for Yuuri and Victor to reach them as they moved against the flow.  Victor was on the phone calling coaches while Yuuri tugged his elbow and held Cocoa’s lead.  Cocoa picked her way through the crowd using the  _ escape  _ command until they reached the edge.  They then edged their way back to where their friend stood with Makka and the two men that forever seemed to tear at his heart.  Chris held him, though, and Seung-gil stood off just enough to give them privacy.

 

Yuuri approached the Korean who filled him in on what happened.  Security surrounded the area and that’s when Nikolai arrived.  “They made it out of the building but we’ve got a tail on them.”

 

“How?  We couldn’t even get out,” Yuuri argued.

 

“They had a back way planned out.  Let us get you back to your hotel.  I can take statements on the way.”

 

* * *

  
  


As things settled down for the night, Phichit curled up in Chris’ embrace but insisted on staying close to Yuuri and Victor.

 

“Do you think they’ll try again?” Yuuri murmured.

 

“Perhaps at Euros or Four Continents.  Still, I don’t think we should let down our guard,” Victor stated.

 

“At a skating event.  Why?”

 

“I don’t know,” Victor murmured.  “Perhaps taking advantage of the chaos.”

 

Yuuri shook his head.  “The last time they made a move at an arena, it was to get a message through to me.  But you said they tried to grab you, Phichit.”

 

“I had Makkachin, though, and she...she protected me.”

 

Yuuri frowned.  It wasn’t adding up but his analytical friend was too distraught to work it out with him.  He felt Victor’s arms tighten around him.  Chris’ eyes were on Phichit.  Seung-gil, Otabek, and Yuri were seated on the next bed.

 

“Is it weird to want you all to stay close?” Yuuri asked quietly.

 

“We’ve got four beds between our two rooms,” Chris suggested.  It was settled with that pronouncement.  Yuri messaged Yakov who agreed that being among friends was best for him.  Otabek and Seung-gil made contacts with family in case something went out on the news.  Then bedding assignments were made.  Seung-gil took the spare bed in Chris and Phichit’s room.  Yuri and Otabek stayed with Yuuri and Victor.  The door remained open between the rooms.

 

* * *

  
  


The night was still as it started to edge its way towards morning and Yuuri was seated on the balcony when Phichit came out to join him.  “I tried to be careful,” the Thai murmured.

 

Yuuri reached out and squeezed his hand.  “I know.  You were not only taking care of yourself but those around you.”

 

“I guess...one thing good came out of this,” he said quietly staring out into the horizon.  “I know where I belong.”

 

“It’s about time,” Yuuri teased bumping his shoulder into the other man’s.  “He loves you, you know.”

 

Phichit sniffed back.  “I was afraid...I wouldn’t be me if I gave in.”

 

“Free spirits need love, too.  And I know you have a great capacity to love in return.  Look at the way you love me.”

 

“I...know.  I think...Seung-gil only ever saw me as a friend.”

 

“I think Seung-gil likes Sara...but he gets annoyed with her brother.”

 

Phichit flicked his eyes up at Yuuri with his mouth opened in an O.  “I...don’t think I saw that right away.”

 

“I tried to tell you.  You weren’t ready to hear it.  Could it be that you kept Seung-gil as an escape plan?”

 

“Well...you know my record with escape rooms.  They never quite work out as planned.”

 

“Quit running, Phichit.  He’s a good man...and he loves you.”

 

Phichit entwined his hand into Yuuri’s and rested his cheek on his best friend’s shoulder.  They watched quietly as the oranges began to override the purples in the sky.  Yuuri finally pressed a kiss into Phichit’s head and pulled him to his feet.  “Let’s take our showers and order breakfast for the rest of the gang.  We have one more day and night in Barcelona and then we can go home.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So many thoughts...so many...what's on your mind?


	40. Chapter 40

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victor and Yuuri skate their duet in the exhibition.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much, Magrathea and BluSkates! I appreciate you more than you can know.
> 
> Take note of the schedule change at the end of the chapter. Stock up on chocolate, warm fuzzy blankets, and snuggly bunnies/poodles.

* * *

 

  
  


Yuuri leaned into Victor as they watched their friends across the room.  Chris and Phichit held close to one another as they placed their order.  The change in dynamic had not been missed by their friends.  Grabbing their trays, they joined the newlyweds.

 

“So...when are you making time for a honeymoon?” Chris teased.

 

They exchanged glances and shrugged.  “We hope to take a trip after Worlds just the two of us,” Victor added.  “We haven’t decided where.  Someplace sunny, perhaps.”

 

“So, no ice?  Can you two survive?”

 

They both laughed.  “I think we can find other...things to occupy our time,” Yuuri suggested, his eyes batting up at Victor.

 

“I can promise that,” Victor answered, tipping his face down so that their noses nuzzled one another.

 

“Okay, now you two are just getting ridiculously cute,” Chris stated, although his smile belied any admonishment.  He turned as he felt a shift next to him and smiled down at the top of the head of his own lover who rested against his shoulder.  He most definitely felt a shift in their relationship, a surrender.  “Mon cher, why did we agree to all of this adorableness for lunch?”

 

“Relationship goals,” Phichit murmured.

 

Chris chuckled even as he watched Victor feed Yuuri from the tray of appetizers.

 

Victor seemed slowly to realize they weren’t alone and grinned at the other two.  With a sheepish shrug, he tilted his head against the top of Yuuri’s head.  “So about the banquet tonight…”

 

“No alcohol.  Well, one perfunctory glass of champagne for politeness,” Yuuri stated.

 

“So, do not leave you by the champagne table,” Chris ascertained.

 

Yuuri laughed bitterly.  “I don’t think you’ll have to worry about that.”

 

“And we leave as a group,” Phichit stated moving the topic forward.

 

“As a group,” the others agreed.

 

* * *

  
  


Yuuri shifted nervously as he and Victor waited to skate in the Gala.  Yuri finished his edgy skate that showed all of the rebellion the teenager could muster.  “Did you help him with that?” Victor asked leaning inward.

 

“It was more Otabek than me.  Otabek suggested the music and everything.  I just helped them finetune it.”

 

“I wonder what Lilia is thinking,” Victor mused with a smirk.

 

Yuuri’s lips held an amused smile.  “It’s almost time.”

 

Yuuri skated into position as his name was announced.  “Yuuri Katsuki skating his exhibition to  _ Stammi Vicino _ , choreographed by his coach and…”  There was a momentary pause and through the tannoy system the audience could make out the quick whispers of the officials talking in the background before returning with an excited exaltation, “...and husband Victor Nikiforov!  Please allow us at the ISU the honor of being the first to publicly congratulating you both on your marriage!”

 

Yuuri smirked.  He knew Victor wrote out the announcement and handed it to them in a closed envelope.  The crowd around him were in a roar cheering them on.  Somewhere mixed into the group was his family, watching him perform live in this international arena.  His husband stood waiting for the moment to join him.

 

As the music started off, the crowd murmured the slight difference that became more apparent as a second voice joined in and his partner drawing a gasp from the audience.  Yuuri couldn’t help but smirk once more.  Victor was eating this up and Yuuri knew it.  Schooling his expression back into the correct move, he wound his interactions with his partner reflecting the music.  The song was no longer mournful and full of yearning.  There was a triumphant uplift that they would stay close to each other and never leave their sides.

 

The crowd responded to the dramatic turn with excitement and the ISU announcer came on and stated, “And the last skate was also performed with Victor Nikiforov in a similar pairs skate.  What a surprise!  But over the years, we have come to appreciate the surprises from Victor Nikiforov and he does not disappoint!”

 

Yuuri chatted amicably with new sponsors and old at the banquet, but he let Victor handle the opening negotiations with people interested in supplementing their skating costs, or branding their images.  After talking with a few coaches, Victor led Yuuri to the dance floor.  He wanted to feel his lover in his arms and they were soon joined by Chris and Phichit.  At some point, Otabek took over the music and it became much more clublike as the older generation fell away.

 

As the night wound up, Victor and Chris escorted their partners to their rooms.  Chris, though, asked Victor to join him on a quick excursion to the drug store.  Yuuri kissed his cheek at the door and they left together.  Phichit winked and disappeared into his own room.

 

* * *

  
  


Victor was laughing with Chris as he unlocked the door to his room.  The other man stood the next door over, pharmacy bag in hand.  “Enjoy,” the Swiss said to the Russian with a wink.  Victor opened the door and stepped inside.  The picture before him could have come off of a pinup.  Yuuri sat in the middle of the bed, feet drawn up beneath him, his makeup subtle...eyeliner, gloss, mascara.

 

“I found this on our bed when I arrived home.  Did you leave it for me?”  Yuuri’s voice was demure, shyness filtering through hands as they fluttered down his form.

 

“Umm, no.  But I…” he glanced to the door they shared with their friends’ room, “I have an idea who did...perhaps as a wedding present.”

 

A beautiful blush bloomed across Yuuri’s cheeks as his eyes fluttered down, his lips opening into a voiceless “oh”.

 

“You’re beautiful,” Victor breathed.  “Someone must know you well to pick out such a lovely shade for you.  And the fit...is perfect.”

 

“Phichit,” Yuuri suggested.

 

“I think they may have worked together for this.  May I?”  His fingers lifted Yuuri’s chin and guided him up to stand on his knees.  The dark blue  [ satin ](https://www.victoriassecret.com/sleepwear/sleep-offer/lace-dot-mesh-slip-dream-angels?ProductID=347754&CatalogueType=OLS&origin=recentlyViewed;pRecommend&search=true) and lace settled just above his knees.  Yuuri’s hand lifted the hem to show a matching set of garters which held a pair of nude silk stockings in place.  “Such perfection,” he murmured, before capturing those lips with his own.  The smoothness of the satin interrupted by the lace teased his sense of touch, the scent of Yuuri’s signature perfume drew him in, the taste of those glossed lips drew out a moan.   “So beautiful,” he whispered as the kiss broke, his eyes already half lidded.

 

“Vitya,” he murmured, tilting his head to one side as Victor’s lips trailed back to his ear.  Victor’s hands knotted into the satin fabric.  His tongue traced out Yuuri’s exposed clavicle.  Yuuri’s fingers started working the buttons to his shirt, trailing up to loosen his tie.  “I am yours for the taking, my husband,” he murmured as his teeth found Victor’s earlobe.  The older man moaned in response, his hand holding onto the satin as it ran up his back.

 

Yuuri tossed the tie to the side and pushed Victor’s shirt free of his shoulders.  His husband settled back on his knees as Yuuri dipped down to capture one nipple between his teeth.  “It appears I am yours in this case,” he chuckled softly, his hands pushing back through the raven’s hair.

 

Yuuri peered up through his lashes.  “I think you are still overdressed, sweetheart,” he murmured sweetly, his fingers sliding down the rippled chest of his husband.  Victor rose up once more on his knees as hands started freeing the button on his slacks then the zipper.  “Do you know what you want, love?”

 

Victor settled back as Yuuri freed him of his pants.  He studied the picture of his lover before him, the satin and lace gathered up to show off the garters.  And...oh, nothing else underneath.  “Yuuri...come here.”

 

Yuuri crawled over to his husband lifting his chin expectantly.  Victor’s hand guided his lover into his lap.  Yuuri settled down and Victor felt the grind of their hardened lengths together.  Leaning forward, Yuuri kissed him sloppy and dirty, sucking on his lower lip as he pulled back.  “Now that you have me…”

 

“Oh, I know what I’m going to do with you.  And you are leaving that satin and lace bit of business on.”  Reaching around him, he smiled as Yuuri gasped at his touch, his finger finding its way to his husband’s entrance.  Yuuri closed his eyes and focused on his breathing and the touch of that finger teasing him.  Victor reached over with his other hand to grab the lube.  Pulling his finger free of the fabric he squeezed the lubricant onto the digit and began warming it.

 

“Vitya?”

 

Victor’s finger found its way back to his entrance as he lifted his eyes up to Yuuri’s warm brown eyes.  “Yes, love?”

 

“I still have a hard time believing I’m yours.  I love you and there’s nothing I want more...but…”

 

Victor brushed lips over his husband’s nipple and sucked for a moment as Yuuri gasped.  As he broke away, he looked up and grinned.  “I have a hard time believing it, too.  How is it that I get to spend the rest of my life with you?  But Phichit took video evidence.  So if you start doubting, we can pull it up and watch it again and again.”  He reached up with his free hand and guided Yuuri down to a kiss.  Several shallow kisses later, he added, “and I’ll fall more and more for you each time, my beautiful husband.”

 

Yuuri melted into him allowing his finger to sink into his heat.  The moan that released in its wake vibrated into Victor’s touch.  Victor caught those lips in a more insistent kiss as his fingers demanded more and more of his partner.  One finger soon became two and he could hear the cries of his lover.  “Vitya…” Yuuri begged.  “Please...I need more of you.”

 

Victor studied his lover.  They were always like this...time spent apart for training only to wrap up competition and their bodies demanding what they had been denied.  Marriage didn’t change that.  Yuuri, his desire reaching back to Victor as they crashed their lips together.  Victor eased in a third finger, stretching Yuuri’s entrance further.  Yuuri’s breathing quickened and then cried out at the loss of those fingers.  Victor reached for the condom and pulled the wrap off of it with his teeth.  “Do you think you can ride me?”

 

“Oh, god yes!”  He waited for Victor to slide on the latex then lined himself up and slowly lowered himself onto Victor with a hungry moan.  Victor’s hands settled on his hips, his eyes half lidded, his lips parting.  Yuuri finally seated himself, the satin and lace gathering around his thighs.  He felt Victor’s hands sliding underneath the fabric, touching the silk stockings, sliding up to reach the skin of his upper thighs and hips.  Yuuri dipped down to kiss him, his tongue dipping between those parted lips seeking him out.  Victor’s palms tightened on Yuuri’s hips as he continued to kiss him, hungry lips demanding to be fed from Victor.

 

Neither knew who started moving first.  Victor’s hands guiding hips up and down, rising up to meet him.  Yuuri driving down on him, his cries building with his pleasure.  Victor grabbed at his kisses with hungry lips.  Yuuri swallowed his moans as they came together.  Victor’s hands slid up Yuuri’s back over the satin, knotting and releasing it, sliding the satin and lace over the surface of Yuuri’s skin.  Yuuri tugged at his Victor’s hair pulling his lips up and demanded his kisses.  He could feel the build of heat lowering from his stomach then rising up demanding release.

 

“I’m close,” he gasped.  He couldn’t focus on any one thing but he felt Victor’s hand pull the hem of the gown free of his length, then another hand reaching for him, sliding down his shaft.  “Vitya!  Please.”

 

“Come for me, Yuuri,” Victor purred, inviting Yuuri’s release...and Yuuri’s body responded.  His orgasm shook him through and he felt Victor catch him as he came crashing down. And as Victor pulled him tight into his embrace, he heard Victor’s moan and felt the warmth of Victor’s release within him.

 

Victor eased him back onto the bed.  Yuuri blinked up at him.  “Let me take care of you,” Victor whispered, his smile tender.  He leaned forward and brushed his lips over Yuuri’s, brushing his lip over Yuuri’s forehead, smoothing back Yuuri’s hair.

 

Victor soon cleaned him up and brought the sheet and blanket over him.  “Sleep, my dear husband.”  Victor then settled in next to him and held him close.

 

“I love you,” Yuuri whispered as the darkness of the room settled around them.  Victor tightened his embrace in answer.

 

Hours later, Victor turned over at the annoyance of his phone.  He saw his husband shift and curl up to block out the noise and smiled indulgently.  Grabbing the phone, he stepped out into the hall.

 

Yuuri’s eyes fluttered open and reached across the bed.  The sheets were cool to his touch.  He sat up and looked around for signs of his husband.  His robe was no longer on the chair and his slippers were gone.  Pulling out his phone, he texted his husband.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Temporary change in posting schedule this week:
> 
> Monday (this counts as Monday), Wednesday, Friday, and Sunday (for next Monday) this week, I'll be posting St. Petes.
> 
> Tuesday and Thursday, I'll be posting Semicolon. There may be a bonus chapter on Saturday as I'm several ahead.


	41. Chapter 41

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING: These chapters go into the details of Victor’s disappearance. If you trigger to kidnapping and captivity scenes, please take care of yourself.
> 
>  
> 
> Summary: Victor is missing in Barcelona.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much, BluSkates and Magrathea! And for the rest of you, take care of yourself while reading. Grab a fuzzy blanket, tissue, stuffed animal, chocolate, and all other comfort items.

* * *

 

TRIGGER WARNING:  These chapters go into the details of Victor’s disappearance.  If you trigger to kidnapping and captivity scenes, please take care of yourself.

 

 

 

* * *

  
  


**Yuuri/ Vitya, where are you?**

 

He stared at the unresponsive screen fighting the panic as each moment ticked by.  He stumbled across the room and beat on Phichit and Chris’ door.

 

The couple opened the door to find Yuuri panicked.  “He’s not answering.  I don’t know where he’s at and he’s not answering.”

 

Chris exchanged a worried glance with his lover.  “I’ll call Yakov.  You help Yuuri get dressed.”

 

“His family is still here.”

 

“I don’t know them.”

 

“I’ll call Mari.  We can go from there.  If Ashley and Nattie were still here, I’d call them as well.”  Phichit led Yuuri back into his room and helped his friend dress into some pajamas and called his coach.  Celestino told him to take care of Yuuri, that he’d call the family.  Soon their rooms were full of Interpol agents, family, friends and coaches.

 

Yakov was speaking firmly with Nikolai in Russian, their gruff voices carrying over the din of the room.  Yuuri started to curl in on himself as his panic took over and affected his breathing.

 

“Hold on, Yuuri.  You don’t want to end up in the hospital,” a familiar voice reached him along with a steadying hand.  He looked up to see his old coach.  “They will find him.”

 

“There were warnings.  Why did he leave the room?”  Yuuri’s eyes plead with him for an answer.

 

Celestino sighed.  “I don’t know why he stepped out.  Maybe that’s all he did.  A breath of fresh air.  Dogs…”

 

Yuuri’s eyes widened as he looked around.  “Makka!  I forgot because she doesn’t normally travel with us.”

 

“Maybe he took her downstairs.”  The coach signalled over a nearby agent and relayed the information.  Turning back to Yuuri, he stated, “They are sending some men to check the dog park.  You keep Cocoa in reach.  If you need to go downstairs, let us know.  Someone, probably several someones, will go with you.”

 

Yuuri nodded.  His eyes rapidly blinked but he could feel the tears of frustration spill over.  Phichit, who had continued to hold his hand and rub circles in his back, gave up his place up for Yuuri’s mother to occupy.  “It’s going to be okay, my son.  Vicchan is strong.”

 

“B-but they use d-drugs.  You c-can’t fight them,” he sputtered, his eyes wide with fear.

 

“Victor will wait for his opportunity.  Just like you did.  And we have people looking for him.”

 

“I-I don’t even know when he disappeared.  Why didn’t I know he was gone?”

 

An agent approached Yuuri and knelt before him.  “This was found in the hallway.  Is it his?”

 

Yuuri’s eyes widened at the familiar phone case.  He nodded wordlessly.

 

“Do you know the passcode?”

 

“Y-yes.”  He reached out with shaky hands and tapped out the code.  They opened it up and looked at his last calls.  “He received a call at four in the morning.  I didn’t know he was gone until after six!”

 

“Keep calm.  Do you know the caller?”

 

Yuuri studied the number.  “It’s his PR firm.  It would have been five for them.  I can...call them.  Find out what it was about.”

 

“I’ll call,” Yakov stated causing Yuuri to jump.  “They might hold back with Yuuri because Victor has stressed his anxiety.”

 

Yuuri nodded in agreement.

 

Yakov pulled out his phone and made the call.  He slipped into rapid Russian and Yuuri turned to his mother who held onto him.  He didn’t realize his father had come up until he heard his soothing voice.  “Vicchan will try to find a way to tell us.”

 

Mari knelt before him and offered a reassuring smile.  “He’s a tough guy for a Barbie doll.  And very resourceful.  Think of all the ways he came up with helping you.”

 

Some commotion by the door caught Yuuri’s attention and he pushed up from his place on the sofa.  Yakov was still talking back and forth on the phone and with Nikolai.  Hotel security came into the room and Yuuri gasped at the sight of an unconscious Makkachin.  He let everyone go and pushed through to her side.

 

“We found her in the maid’s closet,” the security guard explained.  “She wouldn’t wake up.  We brought her here.”

 

Nikolai dispatched a couple of his men to check the closet for anything possibly left behind.  He then knelt down and studied the sleeping poodle.  “It is possible they used the same thing to subdue her as they used on you,” he stated gently.  “It would be best if we take her to a vet.”

 

“I-I...what if…” Yuuri looked around indecisively.  He wanted to go with Makkachin and make sure she was okay for Victor.  But he was afraid to leave just in case they found Victor.  He felt a hand on his shoulder and looked up to see his sister.

 

“Why don’t I go with one of the other men?” she suggested.  “I can let you know what’s going on as soon as the vet checks her out.”

 

“P-please.”  He relinquished the dog to his sister and two of the agents joined her, transporting Makkachin.  He returned to his mother’s side and his father took the spot vacated by Mari.  “I-I’m s-sorry,” he whispered.  “I don’t mean to upset everyone.”

 

“This is a reason to be upset, son,” his father assured him.  “Let us support you.”

 

Minako arrived in the chaos with breakfast.  She sat on her knees in front of him with the offering.  “I know food is the farthest from your mind right now, Yuuri.  But you need to eat and keep your strength up.  Victor would want you to do this.”

 

Yuuri nodded absently and took the savory pastry she brought him and the coffee.  An empanada.  Victor would love it.  His hands didn’t shake too much but every movement distracted him and Minako would patiently redirect him to the food.  He finally ate all that he could and handed her half the roll with an apology.  “It’s fine, Yuuri.  You ate something.  I’ll bring you something later and see if you can eat again.”

 

Others were eating from the breakfast she delivered and Celestino leaned in and whispered in her ear before he signaled Phichit over.  In a low voice, the coach whispered, “We need to decide about changing flights.”

 

“I’m not leaving him.  Especially not like this.” The loyal friend watched Yuuri sit numbly on the bed.

 

“I thought you’d say that.  I’ll make the call.  You might want to suggest something to Christophe.”

 

Phichit nodded and turned to find his boyfriend.

 

* * *

  
  


Victor studied the two Russians fighting at the card table not too far from where he sat tied up.  Another stretch of his arms informed him that the ropes were secure.  He frowned and considered his surroundings.  The irony of an old abandoned church wasn’t lost on him.  Part of the ceiling had collapsed and the floor was littered with debris.

 

The room that held him earlier was less open than where he lay now, but he still couldn’t hear street noises.  They must be outside city limits.  That made sense.  The building did not scream cathedral, crumbling or otherwise.  It was humble although intricate carvings on some of the remaining fixtures showed craftsmanship.

 

_ Yuuri, I can’t imagine what you are going through right now.  I’m fighting.  I know that you won’t quit looking for me.   _ Once more he tested the bonds, wincing as his shoulder reminded him of being thrown on the ground last night.  That was how he shook off the last confusing vestiges of the drug that knocked him out.  When the heavy door closed, he could do nothing.  He just slept and waited.  As sun filtered through the side windows, they came in and took his picture.  Something more to torment Yuuri with.

 

Their words didn’t make sense.  They kept referring to Yuuri as their little brother...someone they did not like.  He closed his eyes and tried to dig through his memory.  Something...what was it?  The drugs they gave him still left him a little cloudy, though, and he couldn’t grasp what he needed.

  
  
  


Phichit found Chris on the balcony.  He had a pensive expression and a cup of coffee.  “Chris?  Are you okay?”

 

He turned and offered a sad smile.  “Victor has been my best friend since we met.  I was there that night he found Yuuri.  To see...that...happen to him.  Phichit, I...what if he’s not okay?”

 

“We can’t think like that,” Phichit said firmly.  “Especially not where Yuuri might hear.”

 

Chris nodded in agreement.  They turned back into the room and found Yuuri talking with the lead investigator.

 

“What’s going on?” Phichit asked his coach.

 

Celestino was watching Yuuri’s animated expression for signs of panic.  He leaned close to Phichit and spoke in a low voice.  “He received a picture.  It’s confirmed as a kidnapping.”

 

“They took a picture of him?  And sent it to Yuuri?”

 

“Yes.  It’s digital.  There were some images that showed up in social media and that was apparently why Victor’s PR contacted him.  They said Victor talked with him for a few minutes and then called the dog to take him out.”

 

“What kind of pictures?”

 

“Well, those were nonthreatening.  Just some from the previous banquet...the one where Yuuri had too much to drink.  I guess the current banquet caused them to resurface.  Victor wasn’t too worried about them it seems.”

 

“Well, they attacked Yuuri on his way back from the banquet.  It is possible that they were there,” Chris pointed out.

 

Celestino frowned but he couldn’t deny it.

 

“So he called Makkachin to go for a walk,” Phichit redirected.  He felt Chris’s arms slip around his waist from behind.

 

His coach nodded.  “He apparently didn’t get far.  Makkachin was found in the maid’s closet the next floor down.  The cops figure he took the stairwell thinking it would be safer than an elevator.  The entire floor has been checked out, though, and no one can find a sign of him.  So they think they just secured the dog and kept going.”

 

“Cameras?”

 

“Not in the stairwell.  Brief glimpses were gained in the hallway on the 4th floor but it wasn’t alarming.  The stairwell was close to the closet.”

 

“Phichit!”

 

The Thai man turned toward the source of the voice and could see Yuuri waving him over.  Chris followed close behind.  Yuuri shoved his phone towards him.

 

“Help,” was all he said.

 

Phichit studied the photo thoughtfully.  “Based on the time and shadow, the windows are facing east.  Can I forward this to my phone?”

 

Yuuri nodded and the detective watched with interest.  Phichit sent the image and soon his phone vibrated.  Handing Yuuri’s back to him, he left the crowded room and entered the one he shared with Chris.

 

“What are you thinking?”

 

It was only then that Phichit realized Chris had followed him.  “Pictures are encrypted.  I can get all technical with this but if they used a phone with a GPS and didn’t disable location services, I can find him.”  He loaded the image on his computer and began digging through the encrypted files.  “Well, what do we have here?”

  
  


SOURCE:

 

[ A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words ](https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2012/04/picture-worth-thousand-words-including-your-location)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay...so I know I have at least two more chapters...maybe three...to wrap this arc up. It's not overly drug out. I will continue to post every other day until we are through this arc.


	42. Chapter 42

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING: These chapters goes into the details of Victor’s disappearance. If you trigger to kidnapping and captivity scenes, please take care of yourself.
> 
>  
> 
> SUMMARY: A second photo...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So many thanks to BluSkates and Magrathea. I just read back through this and...yes, I expect some comments below. So gather your fuzzy blankets and chocolates, kitties and puppies, snuggle in and let's see how far they get into this mystery.

* * *

 

**TRIGGER WARNING:  These chapters goes into the details of Victor’s disappearance.  If you trigger to kidnapping and captivity scenes, please take care of yourself.**

  
  


Phichit tapped his lip thoughtfully as Nikolai watched him work through the information.  “This image is doctored, one image overlays another file.”  He separated the two images, the first appearing as before but the second was of Yuuri and Victor entering their room.  It held a timestamp showing the afternoon before.  “I think this was taken before the Gala.  We had lunch together, then separated for a bit before meeting again at the arena.  Chris and I...well, we had a little errand to run.”

 

“So they’ve been watching them.”

 

“More than that, they had to be in full view of the cameras in the hall,” Phichit pointed out.  He jotted down a time range.  “We should be able to see them.”

 

The footage was received and as they dug through it, the small group found themselves watching what appeared, at first glance, to be housekeeping.  A man pushed a cart with cleaning products and towels down the hall, pausing by a door as the couple laughingly opened their own door.  He was clean shaven and wore a uniform.

 

“That’s him,” Yuuri stated quietly.  “Why didn’t I notice him?”

 

“We often only see what we expect to see.  A housekeeper in uniform did not stand out so your mind easily dismissed him,” Nikolai explained.  “Anyone would.”

 

Yuuri sighed, frowning.  “So they could have gained access to our room at any time.”

 

“We want to check it over pretty thoroughly.  The hotel has provided a place for you to stay temporarily while we do a sweep.”

 

Yuuri nodded uneasily.  Glancing over at his friend, Phichit gave his hand a reassuring squeeze.  “I’m okay.  Let me put Cocoa on lead and gather a few things.  How long?”

 

“A few hours at most.  Then we’ll bring you back down.  I’ll have agents with you and you can contact me at any time,” Nikolai reassured him.

 

“If my family returns looking for me?”

 

“We will redirect them.  Don’t worry.  You aren’t being isolated from your support system.  Just temporarily relocated.”

 

Phichit helped Yuuri gather what he needed for Cocoa and himself.  “Have you heard from Mari?” he asked quietly.

 

Yuuri nodded.  “Makka’s come out of it and they are keeping her for observation.  Mari’s staying until they release her.”

 

“And your parents?”

 

“I told them to go home, that I’ll be fine.  But they are reluctant.”

 

“Of course they are.  They are worried about both Victor and you, Yuuri.”

 

“I know...but I worry about them.  They aren’t used to carrying this kind of stress.”  He placed the last item into his backpack and called Cocoa to his side.  She sat with her lines straight while Yuuri attached the lead to her harness.  He patted her to show his approval and commanded her to heel.  She fell in next to Yuuri as they returned to Nikolai.  Chris was waiting with a backpack slung over his shoulder as well as Phichit’s laptop.  “They are sweeping your room as well, aren’t they?” Yuuri said quietly.

 

“Well, threats were made towards me, also,” Phichit pointed out.

 

Yuuri blinked rapidly as tears began to surface.  “All this is my fault!”  He began shoving the heels of his hand against his eyes, roughly rubbing away the tears.  “I should have...I don’t know, moved away from everyone.  Then nobody would have their lives disrupted.  And Victor...he’d be okay...safe.”  Cocoa whined, pawing at him.  Yuuri dropped a hand dejectedly and buried it into her fur.

 

“Hey, there.  Do you think we’d be happy without you in our lives?” Phichit returned.  “Do you think Victor would?  You are his world.”

 

“And now he is in danger.  Because of me.”  Yuuri’s self blame manifested into a sullen expression.

 

“No,” Phichit insisted.  “Because of them.  Don’t take their choices onto yourself.”

 

Yuuri followed the agent up to their new room.  He immediately felt agitated and ill at ease.  He then started in surprise as Phichit produced a fuzzy blanket and wrapped it around him.  “I know it doesn’t seem like it but...I know Victor is fighting for you.  He’s going to be okay.”

 

“Okay...I want to believe that.  I need to believe that.  But I’m so scared.”  He sat in the middle of the bed, his head leaning against Phichit’s shoulder.  Chris slid into the other side and provided a second anchor.  “Oh, Chris.  I’m sorry.  You’ve become lost in all this.”

 

“Don’t worry about me, Yuuri.  I know you love, my friend.  The best thing I can do for Victor is to support you,” he murmured warmly then was startled when Yuuri threw his arms around him in a hug.  As he relaxed his own arms around the brunette, he felt the telltale signs of tears through the shaking body clinging to him.  He held onto him and let Yuuri fall apart in his embrace, his own lover leaning forward and rubbing soothing circles on his back.  Cocoa shifted, worried about her human, snuffling up to his face.  Yuuri laughed then cried harder, feeling guilty for that small moment of joy.

 

A tap on the door was answered by the agent in the room.  Yuuri shoved his tears out of the way upon Mari’s entrance.  “Hey, champ,” she spoke softly.  “This little girl was eager to see you.”  Makkachin come to him as soon as the lead was released, crawling into Yuuri’s lap and pushing others out of the way as she sniffed worriedly over her human.

 

“Thank you, sis.”

 

“How are you holding up?”

 

“Oh, just falling apart but...at least I’m surrounded by friends.”

 

“It’s a little less crowded.”

 

Yuuri nodded.  “Mom and Dad shuffled everyone away, saying I needed quiet.  I hope they aren’t mad.”

 

“If they know you at all, I’m sure they understand.  I’m going to go check on our parents.  Do you need anything?”

 

“Can you get them to go home?  This is too much stress on them,” Yuuri fretted.

 

Mari sighed with a wary smile.  “They will want to be close to you just in case.”

 

“It’s just that...if they go home, I know everything will be okay.”

 

“Yuuriiii…”   
  


“Please, Mari-neesan,” he implored.

 

She frowned.  “I’ll talk to them.  Okay?  But you need to accept their decision either way.”

 

Yuuri nodded and then surprised her with a hug before she pulled away to see their parents.

  
  


* * *

  
  
  


Victor felt the sting of their bruises.  They could do worse and he knew they could.  Most of the damage was for visible results.  They didn’t...they didn’t rape him.  Not yet, anyway.  He had several abrasions.  Bruises littered his body.  The ropes cut into his skin.  His lip was busted and he had a cut above his eye.

 

“What do you want from me?” he demanded in Russian.

 

They laughed at him.  Told him he was of no real consequence.  Just a means to torment Yoshiro.

 

“Yoshiro.  Your...brother?”

 

The larger one laughed derisively.  “He lost the right to call himself that the day he and his whore mother left us.”

 

“It’s not him,” Victor said quietly causing them to lean forward.  He looked up and held their eyes with cold blue ones.  “My Yuuri is not your brother.”

 

They shoot him disbelieving stares, but the younger one had a flicker of understanding.  Victor wasn’t sure how deep it went.  “He died.  I didn’t find out how, but he is no longer alive.”

 

“Lies!  Of course you’d say that!” the older one replied bitterly.  “You just want to protect him.”

 

Victor sighed.  That was true.  He would say anything to protect Yuuri.  But what he was telling them now, that was also true.  Somewhat.  His truth earned him another blow, hard and along the side of the face that sent a ringing through his ears.  He remained still as the colors cleared from his vision.  He felt lightheaded as it was.  No food since the banquet, no water since sometime in the middle of the night.  He closed his eyes and focused on the facts as they filtered through his thoughts.

 

* * *

  
  
  


Yuuri’s phone buzzed and another picture came through.  “Phichit!”

 

The Thai man took his phone and ignored the signs of abuse, focusing on what the photo was telling him.  “The outline of that shadow...and the architecture we can see.  It looks like an old Byzantine church.”

 

“The other picture puts them south of town.  The GPS coordinates weren’t clear, though.  Do you think you can get a better read on this one?”

 

“It can’t hurt.”  He forwarded the picture to himself and to Nikolai.  “There.  Nikolai will probably come up shortly to see what we know.”

 

Yuuri nodded, his arms wrapping around his thighs to prevent the repetitive rocking motion.  Chris sat beside him running his hand up and down his back as Phichit pulled his laptop free and started working through the codes.

 

Minako arrived with food and water.  Celestino was not far behind.  “Any word?”

 

Yuuri dropped his eyes to his phone before keying in the code and handing to her.  “Another photo.”

 

Minako frowned as Celestino looked over her shoulder.  His coach leaned in and studied closer.   “Look at his eyes, Yuuri.  He’s being defiant.  He wants you to know he’s still fighting.”

 

Yuuri took the phone back and then he saw it.  A small smile touched his lips as he stroked his thumb over the image.  “I know he’s still fighting,” Yuuri said softly.  “I just...hate that he has to fight.  I hate...that they are hurting him...and doing so in my name.”

  
  


* * *

  
  
  


They returned to their rooms that evening and Yuuri spoke in depth with Nikolai about the findings.  The kidnappers had installed a laser beam close to the floor that alerted them when someone entered and exited the room.  This is probably what told them Victor stepped out the previous night.  Phichit found a bug in the camera programming that threw off the GPS.  However, it was a set algorithm and Phichit thought he could break it.

 

They were looking for nearby abandoned churches.  Yuuri was fidgeting as he combed through the computer they handed over to him so he could do something.  He marked every possible location he could find as he scanned the satellite images and googled directories.

 

Chris handled relaying information to family, coaches, and officials.  He also ran interference with the press along with Yakov.

 

Mari came to Yuuri as the evening shadows lengthened.  “Mom and Dad have agreed to go home if you tell them that is what you want.  Minako said she’d accompany them that way you can talk with her and she can relay information to them.  However, Mom wanted you to know that it is not your job to protect her.  That it’s the other way around.”

 

This caused a small smile to quirk in Yuuri’s expression.  “Thanks, Mari.  Are they here or should I go up there?”

 

“They are picking up dinner and bringing it to you.  Mom wants to make sure you eat.  The other part of the deal is that I’m supposed to stay behind and…”

 

“Make sure I eat.  I know.  I think this is best.”

 

Mari smiled reassuringly and fell back to talk with one of the investigators.

 

Yuuri moved back to the bed to sit cross-legged and resume work on the computer.

 

Over the next few hours, Yuuri passed his notes to the agents, his parents came and ate with him and agreed to return home, Yakov and Lilia came by and brought messages from the Russian team.  Lilia would be escorting them home but Yakov promised to remain.  Celestino came by with Minako.  Minako promised Yuuri to keep an eye on his parents.  Celestino asked Phichit what he wanted to do.

 

“I’m staying,” he said firmly.

 

“Yakov is going to remain as coach on site.  He said if you need anything to not hesitate to ask.  Chris?”

 

“Yakov is used to having me underfoot.  I was adopted as a part time Russian years ago when Victor and I became friends.  Josef and I talked; he has already flown back.”

 

Celestino nodded, his expression grim.  “Check in with me, Phichit.  And tell me how Yuuri is doing.  Once mine, always mine.”

 

“Yes, sir,” Phichited responded soberly.

 

“And you...stay with the group.”  The coach had tried to sound paternal, but the fear in his voice showed the true concern.  “Hell, maybe I shouldn’t go.  They tried to take you.”  He pulled out his phone, ready to cancel his flight when he felt a steady hand on his elbow.

 

“I’ll be fine, Ciao Ciao.  I’m with friends and I’ll stay with friends.  We are looking after one another.”

 

Celestino settled a sobering gaze on the young man.  He thought of Phichit, the flighty, flirtatious boy who wouldn’t know where he was if he hadn’t posted it to IG, had transformed to a thoughtful, strong man.  The coach was both proud and heartbroken.  “Don’t even step out that door without someone beside you.”

 

“I promise.  Besides,” Phichit cut his eyes towards Chris, “he’d kick my ass.”

 

“As will I.”

 

“And Yuuri,” Chris pointed out.

 

“Totally not worth it,” Phichit wrapped up.

 

“If I didn’t have other students…” Celestino stated hesitantly.

 

“Go.  It’s going to be okay.  We have a strong lead on where Victor is being held.  We may have him before you land.”

 

Celestino nodded and sighed with resignation.  “Yuuri, I’m leaving you in their hands.”

 

He looked up from his computer for a moment before stating, “I’m fine, coach.  Yakov is taking care of me.”  His attention retrained on the computer and he marked another location.

 

“If he’s busy, he’s not panicking,” Phichit whispered quietly.

 

Celestino nodded.  “Okay, I’m out.  He’s in your hands, Chris.”

 

An hour later, the blond Yuri burst in with an unhappy Lilia on his heels.  He crawled up next to Yuuri and sat next to him.  Yuuri leaned in and hugged him.  “Are you okay?”

 

“I’m supposed to be worried about you,” the teen quipped back.  Then he softened.  “I’m worried about Victor and you.”

 

“They think they might be drawing closer.  I think that means they’ve eliminated a lot of possibilities.  If they send a third picture, Phichit thinks he can break their algorithm.  He’s been talking back and forth with one of his professors via Skype.”

 

“I want to stay,” the boy said with a small voice.

 

“I know...but you have Nationals to prepare for and Victor would want you to do that,” Yuuri answered gently.

 

“What if...you need me?”

 

Yuuri hugged him close, his smile soft.  “I’ll Facetime you.  Okay?”

 

The tiger blinked back his tears and sniffed, not even attempting to hide it.  Yuuri held onto him,  _ to hell with anyone who thought this was backwards _ .  Yuuri wasn’t going to deny this boy’s claim on Victor...or himself.  He pulled back and wiped away his tears.  “I guess...I’ll go with Lilia.  Don’t forget to call me.”

 

“I won’t,” Yuuri promised.  He watched the reluctant teen retreat from the room.

 

“So...who’s left?” Phichit asked quietly as he dropped down next to Yuuri.

 

“Besides us?  Yakov and Mari.  Mari’s moving into my room.  Yakov is staying next to Nikolai.  They are across the hall.”

 

The quiet of the evening settled in and Yuuri finally let his tears fall once more in the stillness.  No one realized it at first then Phichit turned and saw them, wrapping him up in his arms as Chris cried out tenderly, “Oh, honey!”  They held onto him and rocked him.  Mari watched from the second bed.  And in this moment, Yuuri’s phone pinged.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, yeah...I noticed I left you in a lurch. So you want a Saturday posting?


	43. Chapter 43

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING: These chapters goes into the details of Victor’s disappearance. If you trigger to kidnapping and captivity scenes, please take care of yourself.
> 
>  
> 
> Summary: A break in the case reveals Victor’s location.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, BluSkates and Magrathea, for seeing this through.

* * *

 

**TRIGGER WARNING:  These chapters goes into the details of Victor’s disappearance.  If you trigger to kidnapping and captivity scenes, please take care of yourself.**

 

* * *

 

  
  


As promised, the third photo revealed the algorithm and Phichit could get  the shift in coordinates.  As they piled into the SUVs that took them to the location, Yuuri and Yakov were placed into the final car.  “You are not to get out under any circumstances unless I, myself, comes to get you,” Nikolai stressed.

 

Not that they were anywhere close to the church.  Yuuri barely could make out the building.  Yakov’s focused stare unnerved Yuuri.  The Japanese man shifted nervously.  A hand over his startled him.  Yakov wasn’t one for much contact.  He knew that Victor forced it and Yakov bore it for his sake.  But overall, the old coach kept his students at arms length.  So Yuuri appreciated the weight of that hand on his and the reassurance it carried.

 

* * *

 

 

Nikolai moved into the church with his men on either side taking their steps slowly.  Victor was curled up weak and restrained not too far in but oddly not near the brothers who were yet unaware of the team's presence.  They could be heard arguing over what they would do next.  

 

"Vlad, we can't keep him forever!"

 

"All of Russia will hate us if we kill him, Ivan," the other argued.  

 

Nikolai signaled for his team to surround the room.  Three secured Victor and took him out of the room.   Pain could be seen as Victor shifted to his feet with their help  but he kept remarkably silent.  Finally, Nikolai broke the silence.

 

"You won't have to worry about that.  All of Russia will hate you regardless.  Even the world," he promised even as he signaled his team to move in.

 

"What? How?" Vlad asked startled.

 

"You gave yourself away, idiots, with your photos," Nikolai stated, his eyebrows raised.

 

They exchanged glances nervously.  "We wanted a ransom," Ivan argued.  "Everyone knows he's rich as fuck."

 

Vlad's eyes were wide as he looked at his brother in surprise.  "A...ransom...yes."

 

"You tell yourself that, boys," Nikolai stated as the cuffs were placed on their wrists.  "The world's not going to buy it.  They know you are connected to the rapes."

 

"What rapes?" Vlad asked but his surprise was unconvincing.  Nikolai just leveled a gaze at him.

 

"You may deny it all you want but you will be going away for a long time for what you did to those men," he stated.

 

"Men," Ivan laughed bitterly.  "We aren't gay.  Why would we attack men?"

 

Nikolai raised an eyebrow.  They were trying to deflect the charges.  Kidnapping would be a lesser charge and they'd be out within a few years.  "Nice try."  He turned his attention to his men.  "Take them to headquarters and put them into separate interrogation rooms.  In fact, transport them separately."  They were hauled off roughly and Nikolai turned back to his own SUV.    


 

Inside, Victor waited quietly, his restraints removed and a water bottle placed in his hands.  His eyes were worn and tired but held both defiance and uncertainty.  Nikolai smiled reassuringly.  "I suppose you'd like to get back to your husband."

 

"Is my Yuuri here?" Victor asked, his voice uncertain and achy.

 

"Yes.  Let's get you back there."  Nikolai signaled the driver and they were moving.

 

* * *

 

 

An approaching vehicle had Yuuri leaning forward and as soon as the door opened to reveal Victor, Nikolai or not, Yuuri was out the door and had his arms around him.  Yuuri cried hard as he held onto Victor.  Victor hushed him gently, reassuring him that he was okay.  

 

Finally, Yuuri stepped back and looked at him.  His skin was papery, his face lined and his eyes worn.  Yuuri could feel his weight as Victor leaned heavily.  “When did you last eat?” he asked with concern.

 

Victor drew a ragged breath.  “The banquet,” he stated.  “I haven’t had much to drink, either.”

 

Yuuri exchanged glances with Yakov.  Nikolai came up from behind.  “I think you need to go to the hospital.”

 

“I’m fine.  I just need my Yuuri,” he protested.

 

Yuuri reached up and gently stroked his cheek, thumb on Victor’s chin drawing his attention.  “Your Yuuri would feel much better if he knew you were okay,” he requested softly.

 

“Don’t leave me,” he begged.

 

“Of course not,” Yuuri answered.  

 

* * *

  
  


In the hospital, he had an IV attached giving him fluids.  They cleaned his wounds and cataloged them for Interpol.  Yuuri stayed by his side.  He knew because he kept checking.  He didn’t say much.  Answered questions in short sentences.  His head was still so full.  How could he describe the experience?

 

In his room, he had a tray of food set before him and Yuuri made him take it slowly.  The food was bland and basic because he had gone without for a short amount of time.  Still, Victor savored every bite and felt it's warmth as it went down his throat and settle into his stomach.

 

Nikolai came into his room later and took a longer statement.  Victor frowned as he recalled...everything.  It came in lightning flashes, jumbled in his memory.  “Makka needed to pee and I wanted some fresh air.  I...didn’t think they’d do anything else.  They already made an attempt with Phichit.  They were in the stairwell.  I thought...well, I thought it would give Makka some exercise and that I could go to a small designated area just outside the hotel for Makka instead of the dog park.  I thought...it was safer.”

 

Victor turned his eyes to Yuuri.  “I should have awakened you.  But...then again, what if they went for both of us?  I know you will argue with me.  But I’d rather it would be me than you...or only me.”

 

Yuuri thinned his lips.  “I’d rather it be neither of us.  But...it’s over.”

 

Victor nodded and returned his attention to Nikolai.  “I don’t remember much after the stairwell.  Not for awhile.  I was with Makka.”  He stilled, his eyes widening.  “Makka!”  He turned back to Yuuri imploringly and his husband reached out and gave his hand a squeeze.

 

“She’s fine.  They knocked her out and put her in a closet but we found her pretty quickly.  She’s been to a vet and has been thoroughly checked out.”

 

Victor breathed a sigh of relief at Yuuri’s explanation.  He was quiet for a moment, his eyes closing, his thoughts clouding.  Finally, he opened them again, refocusing on Nikolai.  “I woke up as they threw me into a room.  The only solid room remaining in that old church.  I wasn’t truly out but I wasn’t quite awake either?  I figure it was something to do with the drugs they used to subdue me.  I was tied up and they weren’t gentle with me.  I had a few bruises when I came out of it.”

 

“Do you know what they were trying to accomplish?” Nikolai asked.

 

“I didn’t at first.  However, your idea of Yuuri being a stand in for their brother seems dead on.  They kept referring to their younger brother.   I figure they had a shitty upbringing after the boy left with his mother and they blamed it all on him.  Still, to transfer it all to my Yuuri...that’s some fucked up shit.”

 

“Indeed.”

 

“Will they get convicted?”

 

“Your testimony links them to Yuuri which links them to the rapes.  That will allow us to get DNA evidence.  So we can get a solid conviction on multiple counts of rape as well as your kidnapping.  We will pile on every charge in between.”

 

“But…”  Yuuri’s eyes darted from one man to the other before finishing, “It’s over.  Right?”

 

Nikolai thinned his lips and nodded heavily.  “The search is over.  Now we have the legal side.  I’ll have to call on you both to testify as well as the others that have come forward agreeing to testify.”

 

“I’ll do it,” Yuuri said quietly.  “I never want them to hurt anyone else.”

 

Victor’s eyes flicked up to Nikolai.  “I told them their real brother died.”

 

“For all we know, he did.  Or he has chosen to disappear.  If they tried to get to him, it could explain his retreat from the world and his disappearance from the figure skating scene so many years ago.”

 

Nikolai left and Victor was left alone with Yuuri once more.  “Can you...will you lie next to me, Yuuri?”

 

Yuuri studied the bed and his IV thoughtfully.  “We’ll have to be careful.”

 

“I just need to feel you close to me.  Maybe then I can rest.”

 

Yuuri curled up next to him, resting his head on his husband’s shoulder.  He felt that arm tighten around him and heard the man beneath him wince.  He started to pull back but Victor protested.  “No, no…please don’t go.”  Victor found a comfortable position and they laid still for a while.

 

Yuuri thought he had dozed off when the other man started speaking again.  “The tendons are a little strained.  They...won’t let me skate.  I won’t be cleared for Nationals.”

 

“Vitya…”

 

“I’ll have Yakov argue for me to skate at Euros and Worlds based on my Grand Prix record.  But I know Nationals are out.”

 

“This is my fault,” Yuuri murmured dejectedly.

 

Victor tensed beneath him and Yuuri pulled up to look at him.  His eyebrows were drawn down and he was frowning.  “What the fuck, Yuuri?  How the hell is it your fault?  You couldn’t control what they did any more than I could control Sasha.  I at least knew Sasha.  You didn’t even know these men.  You didn’t invite them into your life.  There is no way in hell this is your fault!”

 

“They hurt you because of me,” Yuuri whispered.

 

“They hurt me because of their own sick thoughts.  But...they didn’t break me.  I came back to you.  Okay?”

 

“Vitya…”

 

“Okay?”

 

Yuuri sighed but nodded, settling back down on Victor’s achy shoulder, trying not to feel guilty for that ache or any of the cuts and scrapes.

 

* * *

  
  


Victor was released the next morning into the care of his husband and his coach.  They arrived back at the hotel to find themselves packed.  Phichit and Chris were in the next room, the door in between open.  Poking his head into the door, Victor smiled wanly.  “Hey.”

 

Chris returned that smile as he rose up to face him.  “Hey, yourself.  How are you?”

 

“I’ve been better.  The shoulder is out.  I just have to scrap it back together for EC.”

 

“Don’t overdo it.”

 

“Yakov already has me seeing the team physician and is booking time with PT.  Yuuri’s called and has me set up to see the psychiatrist.  I think I’m in good hands.”

 

“I guess this means you can go with Yuuri to All Japan,” Phichit pointed out.

 

Victor’s face lit up.  “That’s right! Yuuri!”  He turned to face his husband.

 

“I heard.  I can’t believe you are excited.”

 

“Are you kidding?  This will be the only time I get to see you live before I retire!  And I get to go see our family in Hasetsu.”

 

“Well, Mari is still here.  She’s just downstairs on the computer booking a flight,” Phichit pointed out.

 

“Mari stayed for me?” Victor asked, his eyes widened.

 

“You goose!  They all would have stayed for you,” Yuuri stated, his eyebrows raised but his expression adoring.  “We fly out tomorrow morning.  Phichit, did you at least leave him a change of clothes?”

 

“Travel clothes, underwear and pajamas are in the top drawer.  Everything else is securely packed.”

 

“You’re a good man, Phichit,” Victor stated appreciatively.  They closed the door somewhat while Yuuri helped him undress for a shower and helped him into his shirt and pajamas to sleep.  “I can’t believe how much that injury makes this so difficult,” Victor complained.  He breathed through the pain, though, and allowed Yuuri’s ministrations. 

 

Mari was waiting in the other bed and they visited quietly as Victor dozed off to sleep.  He stirred when the lights were turned out and Yuuri settled in next to him.  Without the sedative in his system, he felt the experience fall upon him as he shifted restlessly in his nightmares, remembering details he left out in the telling.  It was bad enough for Yuuri to see his injuries.  He didn’t need to know the full story behind them.  He roused as a soft song was being sung to him and it took a moment before he realized it was the  [ _ Cossack’s Lullaby _ ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oshON1NsjPY) ...the song he first sung to Yuuri in the midst of his own nightmare.  Tears stung his eyes in the darkness but he knew...this man loved him and would not leave him in the darkness of his dreams.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well...it's over...and only 12 more chapters left to this part. What do you think will happen?


	44. Chapter 44

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Preparation for Nationals and dealing with past...and future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much, BluSkates and Magrathea. You gave this a second look even after an exhausting weekend. I really appreciate it.

* * *

 

Yuuri felt the sting of St. Petersburg’s cold air as he lugged the last of their luggage into the house.  Victor fussed and frowned because he wasn’t allowed to help, getting his hand swatted each time he reached for anything.  “Don’t be ridiculous.  The sooner you heal, the sooner you are able to skate,” Yuuri stated to his concerns.

 

“Yakov’s already pulled me from Nationals.  This is the first time I’ve skipped Nationals since I was in my teens.”

 

“No, I suppose not.  I remember the year you had knee surgery.”

 

Victor frowned.  “I hated that year.  I was so depressed and still living with my parents off and on.”

 

Yuuri thinned his lips.  Victor didn’t need any unpleasant memories on top of recent events.  “Okay, so I’m unpacking and sorting laundry.  Do you think you can handle something light for dinner?”

 

Victor frowned as he considered their options, the refrigerator not very promising.  “It looks like some questionable left over borscht,” he began.

 

“Throw that out.  It was from before we left.”

 

“Technically, everything is from before we left.  I’ll call to the main house and see what’s going on there.”

 

Yuuri disappeared into the laundry room and returned half an hour later to a kitchen full of friends and food.  Ivan met him at the counter.  “We all had to see for ourselves that he was okay,” he murmured.

 

“He’s not talking much about it.  I need to get him in to see Dr. Abramovich.”

 

Ivan took a drink from his glass.  “He takes forever to open up with these things.”

 

Yuuri nodded, but a slight smile touched his lips as he watched Dmitry sharing an animated story that had Victor laughing.  He needed smiles and laughter.   _We can take his pain out and deal with it when he is ready._

 

That night, Victor rested his head on his husband’s chest.  Yuuri carded his fingers through the older man’s silver locks.  “I don’t want to go to sleep,” Victor confessed.

 

“Just remember, you are safe and in my arms,” Yuuri murmured as he continued his ministrations.  “So rest in me.”

 

Victor finally eased into sleep.  Yuuri stared at the ceiling a while longer as he played with his lover’s hair.   _The court system will move slowly, but the men will be incarcerated for the duration of the trial.  They even caught the cousin that was helping them out._  He just hated that Victor had to be hurt in the process.  Yuuri finally joined him and slept.

  


* * *

 

 

They returned to some semblance of routine interrupted by calls closing out the case.  Yuuri made faces when he saw Nikolai’s name on the caller ID.  They had to make a court appearance in January falling between EC and 4CC.  They could be called back for the defense.  

 

At the rink, Victor’s injury had him operating as an off-ice coach.  Both Yu(u)ris were responding to his direction.  He would leave with the older Yuuri in another week for All Japan and a brief visit with family.  The younger would be heading to Russian Nationals.  In between coaching sessions, Victor went to physical therapy.  The team physician kept watch over the injury and made pronouncements that delayed his return to the ice.

 

On the third day, Yuuri was in the studio working with Yuri, the Japanese man clearly not interested in allowing either of them an easy schedule as important events were so close.  He drilled the little blond just as hard as he did himself.  They finally collapsed and stared at the ceiling.

 

“How are you doing?” the teen asked.

 

Yuuri frowned.  “I’m...okay?  I mean, I’m worried about Vitya but...they are gone.  So it’s a mixed kind of feeling.  Mainly, I’m angry.  I’m really mad that Victor was hurt in all of this.”

 

“I figured as much.  You’ve been pushing hard.  Have you thought about going back?”

 

“Back?”  Yuuri shook his head in confusion.

 

“To...Lev’s place?”

 

Yuuri sighed and nodded.  “I have.  In fact, I have a commitment to keep.”

 

“Well, if you aren’t busy this evening, Boris texted and said you might stop by.”

 

“Really?  It must have something to do with one of the kids.  Okay.  Tell him I can do that.”

They reached for their phones at the same time.  As Yuri texted his reply, the brunette scrolled through his notifications and messages.

 

**Vitya/ I got another appointment at the last minute with Abramovich.  Can you catch a ride home with the others?**

 

Yuuri frowned thoughtfully before he replied.

 

**Yuuri/ I’m headed to the gym.  Text me when you’re finished.  I may need you to swing by and get me.**

 

**Vitya/ I can do that.  Don’t overdo it.  We leave for All Japan in three more days.**

 

**Yuuri/ Take care of yourself.  I’ll be fine.**

 

**Vitya/ I’m trying.**

 

Yuuri felt a trace of a smile find its way to the surface.  “He’s getting help.”

 

The blond turned his head to the side to look at his friend.  “And now to take care of you.”

 

Yuuri chuckled.  Leave it to the teen to call him out.  “Yes.  Thank you.  Sometimes I think you see when I’m trying to cover shit up.”

 

Yuri shrugged.  “Because I do the same.  You see through my shit all the time.”

 

Yuuri smirked.  “Like when you were sneaking the kittens into the inn?”

 

“I found homes for them!” the blond defended.

 

“I suppose you did.  But you tried to cover their meows with little squeaks!  Mari kept looking at you like you lost your mind.”  Yuuri chuckled and the blond joined in breathing a sigh between them.

 

* * *

  
  


Victor met with Nikolai.  He didn’t want Yuuri to worry and insist on coming.  Deflecting to Abramovich seemed a good idea at the time, but now he felt guilty.  He was going to see the old doctor but Victor failed to mention the appointment with the investigator before hand.  He called the psychiatrist once Nikolai confirmed what he wanted to discuss, feeling he’d need to sort through his emotions after the fact.

 

“Now we are alone,” Nikolai began.  “Do you want to go through the events of the kidnapping a little...more thoroughly.”  Nikolai didn’t directly call him on his misdirection but the seasoned investigator knew something was off.

 

Victor sighed.  “I just...didn’t want to drag Yuuri through the torture.”

 

“Can I record this?  I know you are willing to testify but we lose details over time.”

 

“I don’t...know if I will lose details, Nikolai,” Victor stated bitterly.  “I dream it every night.”

 

“Just take it slowly.”

 

Victor nodded.  “The part about how they took me...drugging me...all of that is pretty much correct.  After they got me to that church, though...I didn’t eat.  I didn’t trust what they gave me to drink.  Sometimes, though, I had to give in.  My body demanded water.

 

“They kept arguing about what to do with me.  They...weren’t trying to grab me.  They wanted...Yuuri.  And I knew if they got him, he wouldn’t be allowed to live.  However, they thought with me, they’d have an opportunity to grab Yuuri.  They thought...they could lure Yuuri to them.  They just didn’t expect you to find them so quickly.”

 

“It’s a good thing we did.  Their pictures gave a lot away, and your partner’s friend is very skilled with a computer.  We have people who can do what he does, but having him right there saved us time.”  Nikolai held his eyes.  “I interrupted.  Please continue.”

 

Victor looked down, studying his hands.  “That’s okay.  I don’t have a clear idea about what happened while I was gone.  They restrained me.  I know I was drugged more than once but nothing suggested I’d been...raped.  I think...because I’m not the right type?  They were storing themselves up for Yuuri.  But...if Yuuri didn’t respond to their call when they put it out there, I think...they would have...just to torture Yuuri from the distance.”  Victor lifted his eyes.  “I would have rathered it be me than him.  I didn’t want him to come.  I knew when they took the pictures I had to look strong.”

 

“I think you accomplished that.”

 

“They beat me at first to prove that they weren’t afraid to hurt me when they sent the first picture to Yuuri.  The second time...because I defied their delusion.  They...thought Yuuri was their brother.  I continued to fight them, to defy them with my words.  Toward the end of the day when you found me...I almost escaped.  I shook them free.  But then...I was weak and couldn’t move quickly enough.  I was shoved and landed in some debris.  I think I must have hit my head because it all went dark.  When I woke up, I was restrained once more.  And they were arguing over what to do with me.”

 

“And that’s when we came in.”

 

Victor nodded.  “I am just afraid...if Yuuri knew they were after him, not me, he’d blame himself more.  But...I will testify.”

 

“Thank you.  We want to put these crazy bastards away.”

 

“Yuuri wants to testify as well.”  Victor was quiet, thoughtful.  “Part of me wants to do it on a separate day...and try to keep Yuuri from coming.  But I know he’d come anyway.  So...can we do it together?  In the same day or two?”

 

“I’ll talk to the attorney processing this case for trial.  I’m sure they’ll be amenable.  They are already trying to work you in around your skating schedule.  Now, do you want to attend the proceedings?”

 

“Yuuri and I talked about it.  We just want to put it behind us.  We’ll come when we have to.  We’ll attend the sentencing if we can.  But really...we just want it over.  We want to move on with our lives.”

 

“I understand.  We’ll keep you informed.  Thanks for coming in by yourself to give me your statement.  I thought maybe you were holding something back.”

 

“I just...he’s been hurt enough.”

 

“Of course.”  Nikolai patted him on his shoulder and offered him a sad smile.  It had been a long year.  Victor shook his hand and withdrew.  He now had to meet with Abramovich.  They were considering EMDR to deal with his nightmares and he wanted to move aggressively on this.

  


* * *

  


Yuuri walked through the door bundled up in a coat and boots, his gym bag slung over his shoulder.   _Russian winters must be an acquired taste_ , he decided.  A warm voice greeted him and invited him in.  “Hey!  It’s Katsudon!  Come get something warm to drink!”

 

He slowly removed his layers and made use of the coat rack.  Turning, he accepted the coffee from Lev.  “Boris seemed to want me to stop by,” he murmured quietly as he held onto the cup letting the warmth seep through his skin before he took a drink.

 

Lev nodded, his eyes darting to the corner.  Yuuri’s eyes rested on Andrei.  “He’s been by every day looking for you since the news broke.”

 

“Oh.”  Yuuri took a deep drink of the coffee before setting down the mug.  He took a nearby chair and changed to gym shoes.  Coming to Andrei’s side, he smiled warmly.  “Hey.  You okay?”

 

The kid looked up, his eyes dark gray eyes wide, his pale blond hair pulled back into a hasty ponytail.  “I saw the news.”

 

Yuuri nodded taking a seat before the other and stretching.  The boy fell in and imitated him in his movements.  “Do you know my story?” Yuuri began quietly.

 

“I’ve...heard things.”  The little boy seemed to fall between avoiding his gaze entirely and sheepishly looking at him from beneath his blond lashes, his eyes uncertain.

 

Yuuri thinned his lips as he reached towards his toe.  “Around a year ago, I was...raped.  Victor is the one who found me, helped me.  We’ve been pretty much together ever since then.”

 

“The guys that kidnapped Victor?”

 

“They are the ones that raped me.  They...had a half brother.  His mother was Japanese.  Both mother and son were figure skaters.  Apparently they got out of an abusive relationship.  But the boys were left behind.  They...saw me and decided I was him.”

 

“They...raped you...thinking you were their...brother?”

 

Yuuri saw the intense disgust and confusion lay naked on the boy’s face.  “Rape isn’t about sexual gratification,” Yuuri explained.  “In this case, it was used to punish.  They were angry.”

 

“The newscaster...they said there were others.”

 

Yuuri nodded.  “There were.  They seemed to focus their obsession on me, however.  Because of that, they targeted my best friend and my husband.”

 

“You’re married?” Andrei’s voice took on a hesitant enthusiasm.

 

“We are...now.  We were married in Barcelona.  Just before he disappeared.”

 

“Oh, wow!  But...he’s okay, right?”

 

“Yes.  He’s visiting our counselor right now and I decided to come here.”

 

Andrei drew his knees up to his chest.  “My mama was raped.  Her mama was a whore and one of her men thought my mama was old enough.  She was my age.  That’s how she ended up with my papa.  She thought he could protect her.”

 

“Did he?”

 

“She didn’t know she needed protecting from him.  He’s dead, now.  She got out.  But...she couldn’t take care of herself.  She didn’t go to school.  Could barely read.  She wanted more for me.”

 

“Is she still alive?”

 

“As far as I know.  She gave my sister and me up.  She’s...not a bad person.”

 

“Of course not.  You’re not just here to check on me, are you?”

 

Andrei shrugged.  “I’m aging out.  They are going to separate us.  I’m all Nina has.  Nobody’s going to adopt her.  She’s...got HIV.”

 

Yuuri could feel the desperation in the boy’s voice.  “How old are you?”

 

“Fourteen.  They want to put me in a transition home so that maybe I can have a life...but Nina’s only five.”

 

“Let’s get you home to her.  For now, you can be there for her as much as possible.”  Yuuri nodded to Boris who came to their side.  “Do you think you could give us a ride back?  Victor has our car.”

 

The social worker nodded.  “Come on, Andrei.  Let’s get you back home.”

 

Yuuri followed, reaching for his coat when he saw Andrei had nothing to reach for, he dropped the coat around the boy’s slender shoulders.  Andrei looked up surprised.  “No, man.  This coat’s too nice.”

 

“Maybe we can stop somewhere to get you a coat that’s not too nice.  Okay?”

 

Andrei shrugged.  “Nina ain’t got no coat, either.”

 

“You can pick one out for her as well.”

 

* * *

  
  


They entered the home and Nina spotted Andrei, running up to him.  “Nina!” a voice reprimanded but Boris waved her down.

 

“Zoya, I think it’s very important for this young man to meet Nina,” Boris stated quietly as he pulled the woman aside.

 

Yuuri knelt down before Nina.  “Hello.  My name is Yuuri.  I’m your brother’s friend.”

 

“Hi.  You’re too old to be Andrei’s friend.”

 

Yuuri laughed, his hands sliding through her flaxen hair.  “Maybe.  I teach dance and figure skating.”  She looked up at him, her eyes wide.  “You have the bluest of eyes.”

 

“They’re my mama’s eyes.  I haven’t seen her in a long time.”

 

“So I’ve heard.”

 

“Yuuri’s invited us to have dinner with him, Nina,” Andrei muttered.  Yuuri shot a glance to the boy, but decided to go along with it.  He caught Boris’s eyes and the other man nodded.

 

She shivered.  “It’s so cold outside.”

 

“Perhaps this would help,” Yuuri offered.  He pulled the pink coat from the bag.  It was wool and warm and her eyes lit up at the sight of it.  Yuuri helped her put it on and buttoned the large pink buttons.  He then produced a matching beanie and gloves.  Once he had her outfitted, he held out a hand.  Boris waved them towards the door.

 

“We’ll bring them back before bedtime, Zoya,” the social worker promised.

 

As they guided the kids out to Boris’ car, Yuuri received a text.

 

**Vitya/ I’m leaving.  Where will I find you?**

 

**Yuuri/ I’m with Boris and the kids.  We are going to a diner.  I’ll send you the location.**

 

**Vitya/ I’ll meet you there.**

 

Half an hour later, they were joined by Victor who greeted the little girl with surprise.  “Who’s this?”  Victor’s eyes danced, always good with children.

 

Andrei smiled, relaxed in the men’s presence.  “This is my sister, Nina.  Nina, this is Victor.  He is married to Yuuri.”

 

She looked from one to the other with big blue eyes before leaning over to whisper in Andrei’s ear but it came out very loud.  “Can boys get married?”

 

“In some places,” Andrei answered in an equally loud whisper, winking over the top of her head.  That seemed to satisfy her.

 

“What have we decided on for supper?” Victor responded warmly.

 

“Knish!” both kids demanded and then burst into giggles.  Victor met Yuuri’s eyes over the tops of their heads and smiled.

 

Victor and Yuuri offered to take them back home, and Nina fell asleep on the way.  Bundling her up, Yuuri carried her inside as Victor guided Andrei in with a hand on his shoulder.  Zoya met them at the door.  Her eyes flicked over the unfamiliar face.

 

“Where’s Boris?”

 

“Victor and I offered to bring them back,” Yuuri said quietly.  “I hope that was okay.”

 

She frowned but nodded.  “I suppose.  I just run the place.  Nobody ever asks me.”

 

Yuuri struggled to keep the dislike from his voice as he took in the curt reply.  “If you show me where she sleeps, I’ll tuck her in bed,” Yuuri murmured so as not to wake her.

 

Zoya led them down the hall and opened the door.  Four beds were lined along two walls.  Victor quickly located the empty one and tucked her in as Yuuri laid her down.  Yuuri settled a stuffed poodle in next to her that she found in the car.  As they left the room, Andrei was waiting, his eyes wide.

 

“We need to talk,” Yuuri stated quietly.  “But I heard you...even what you didn’t say.”  He scruffed the boy’s hair.

 

Andrei drew a shaky sigh and nodded.

 

“Get some rest, now.  Boris has my number if you need to call me.”

 

“Thank you, Yuuri.  Victor.   _Dobroy nochi_.”

 

“ _Dobroy nochi_ ,” they both answered.  Victor guided Yuuri out with a hand on his back.  The boy watched them thoughtfully.

 

In the car, they were quiet at first as Victor negotiated the vehicle out of the drive.  After several minutes passed, he broke the silence.  “We just got married.”

 

“I know,” Yuuri murmured.

 

“We have our own problems to work through.”

 

“I know that, too.”

 

“We’re gay.  That could be a strike against us.”

 

“Boris knows.  We’ll talk to him.  Find out what we need to do.”

 

“You’re determined to do this?”

 

Yuuri nodded, shoving unbidden tears from his cheeks.  “They will separate them, Vitya.  And she...has HIV.  He’s too old.  Nobody will adopt them.”

 

“Not nobody,” Victor said quietly, a tender smile on his lips.  “I did say I wanted a family.”

 

Yuuri looked towards him, his eyes shimmering with tears.  “Is that a yes?”

 

“We’ll see what Boris says.  If he thinks it’s possible, we’ll see what we need to do from there.”

 

“Thank you.”  Yuuri snuggled up to his arm as Victor reached a hand out to rest on his knee.  “I don’t know why this is so important but...I felt a connection with Andrei right away.”

 

“I know what you mean.  The hard part will be breaking it to Yura.”

 

“Yura?” Yuuri sat up to look at his husband’s face.  Viktor kept his eyes on the road but Yuuri could see them sparkling with mischief.

 

“He might be jealous,” Victor pointed out as he pulled into the drive.

 

“I...didn’t think about that.”  Yuuri smiled along, but in his heart he did worry about hurting the little blond.

 

“He’ll adapt.  Don’t worry.”

 

Victor guided Yuuri inside.  As Yuuri hung his coat, he felt arms slip around his waist from behind.  “I love you,” his husband murmured in his ear.  “More and more each day.”

 

Yuuri remembered Victor’s appointment earlier.  “Are you...okay?”

 

“I’m getting there.  I think it will be better knowing they can’t get to you.”

 

“Or you,” Yuuri added, turning in his arms.  Victor rested his forehead against Yuuri’s.  The radio played in the background, left on to keep the dogs company.  They fell into step with the old Russian melody and danced to the song that was almost a lullaby, almost a waltz.  Yuuri’s head rested on Victor’s shoulder and the older man held him close.  “I was so scared,” Yuuri finally murmured.  Finally putting words to the emotions they tucked away.

 

“I know.  I hope things will calm down for us now.”

 

“You...have nightmares,” Yuuri whispered.

 

Victor pressed his cheek against Yuuri’s head.  “Not as bad as the nightmares I had when I worried someone was going to hurt you.  I will get better.  I’m starting EMDR therapy and Dr. Abramovich made arrangements for me to see Sasaki-sensei while we are in Japan.  I’d like for you to go with me.”

 

Yuuri stepped back and met his eyes.  “I would have gone today.”

 

“I know.  I needed...to say it all the first time without feeling like I was protecting you.”

 

“You don’t have to…”

 

“It’s hard to talk about it.  I need...time.  Okay?”

 

Yuuri nodded.  A whine by the door reminded them they had dogs to take out.  Yuuri knelt down next to Cocoa.  “Did the boys not take you out?”

 

“They did,” Victor called as he returned with the leads.  “There’s a note on the counter.  She probably just misses you.”

 

“We’ve hardly been separated, but she was so tired.”

 

“And she’ll be traveling with us once more when we go to Japan.  Lilia said to bring Makka to the main house and her housekeeper will keep watch over her along with Yura’s cat.”

 

“I hate that we can’t bring her with us.”

 

“I know.  She’s still recovering from Barcelona, though.”

 

“We all are,” Yuuri pointed out with a shiver.

 

Victor hugged him close and received a hug in response.  “We’re going to be okay, though, baby.”

 

“I know...I think...I’m just tired, too.”

 

“Let’s take these girls out then we can snuggle up and sleep.”

 

“Together.  All of us.”

 

As Yuuri stretched out next to Victor, he felt Cocoa at his back.  Makkachin somehow wedged herself by their feet.  Victor held him close and they traded soft kisses until they fell asleep.  Thoughts of Andrei and Nina crowded out shadows of the past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I *may* have a Wednesday post as well this week. I hope you enjoy this today's offering.


	45. Chapter 45

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Staccato scenes while in Japan. Visits home, family time, All Japan, and Sasaki.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've received some notes of complaint about this path I'm talking my characters down. Whether you agree with it or not, that's up to you. However, they are taking this road. This chapter discusses more of those thoughts. 
> 
> Thanks, BluSkates and Magrathea, for your support, your edits, and your friendship.
> 
> Thanks to my readers who continue to support this project.

* * *

  
  
  


Yuuri felt a surge of excitement as they arrived in Fukuoka.  “I’m so glad you extended the time we have in Japan,” he admitted excitedly.

 

“You’ve been through so much this year.  You need some time with the ones that love you.”

 

“They were in Barcelona...but…” he paused and turned sparkling brown eyes to Victor.  “I’m happy we are going to retire here.  Are you...still happy with that decision?”

 

Victor’s expression greyed slightly, “Honestly, I’m half tempted to retire tomorrow just so that we can start our life here.  However…”

 

“The Olympics.” Yuuri finished for his husband.  It was a favorite fantasy of Victor’s to be able to run away, but he knew that their responsibility of representing not just Russia, but Yakov, was too important.

 

“Exactly.  I think that’s a good stopping point for me.  I’d love to see you skate a few more years, but you can train from here.”

 

They climbed onto the train that would take them to Hasetsu.  As Victor snuggled up to him and stared out the window, Yuuri reflected on his life and still found himself amazed that Victor wanted him.  He thought about the kids.  “Do you think...they’ll let us have them?  We have such an active life.”

 

“The kids?”

 

Yuuri nodded, realizing he started talking mid-thought.

 

“I hope so.  I’ve been thinking about how to make it work since that night.  The little ones we work with at the rink are bussed there for the after school program and picked up by parents at six.  If we switch Nina to that school, she can do the same.  Andrei is already independent.  I’d like to see what he’s interested in learning.  If we take him in, he’ll have choices that he didn’t have before.”

 

“He grabs hold of every opportunity he can see.  He understands the importance of having choices.  He said...his mother didn’t have choices.”

 

“If you are committed to this, I’m behind you, Yuuri.  I thought we’d wait until one of us wasn’t skating, but sometimes fate plays another card.  Maybe you and this boy crossed paths for a reason.”

 

“Maybe...I’ll send a text to Boris asking him what we’d need to do in order to adopt?”

Victor smiled and nodded.

 

* * *

  
  


In Hasetsu, the conversation came up again and again.  Finally, Yuuri’s parents set them down.  “Children don’t always come when we plan for them,” Hiroko began.  “If you wait for a perfect time to have them, you will never have them.  Something will always come up.  You have children and work your life around them.”

 

“If you feel the drive to make a home for these two children, then do what you can to do so,” Toshiya added.  “Homes and hearts will expand to make room.”

 

“We’re committed to Russia for another two years,” Yuuri murmured.

 

“Perhaps that’s a good thing, son,” Hiroko pointed out.  “It will help you to stabilize their world before you bring them into yours.”

 

“Do you have pictures of them?” his father asked.

 

Yuuri smiled, pulling out his phone to show his father.  The older man held the phone out to focus on the pictures Yuuri showed him.  “The boy needs to eat more,” Hiroko fussed as she looked over her husband’s shoulder.

 

“That little girl looks thin, too,” his father pointed out.

 

“Well, about that.  She’s...got HIV,” Yuuri said quietly.

 

His parents exchanged thoughtful glances.  “I remember when that disease became more widely known.  It was scary.  They have medicine for it now, don’t they?”

 

“It’s getting better and better,” Victor stated quietly.  “We could take her into Europe to better facilities.  We just have to be more aware in her care and use universal precautions.”

 

“Yuuri grew up at the onsen.  He has those procedures ingrained in him,” Hiroko stated.

 

Yuuri chuckled quietly.  “It was part of my injury training with my degree as well.”  He sighed, though, his smile fading.  “We’ll have to train anyone who is responsible for her care, though.  Teachers, friends, babysitters.”

 

“She’s delightful, though,” Victor argued.  “She charmed me right away.”

 

Yuuri nodded.  “Me, too.  The moment I laid eyes on her...I knew.  I considered Andrei when I met him but I was hesitant...until I met her.”

 

“It sounds like you’ve already made your decision, son,” Toshiya noted with a warm smile.  “I think you just need to accept it and move forward.  We support you in this.”

 

“Besides, I was two months pregnant when your father and I married.  It’s not too soon to have a family.  See how happy we are together?”

 

Yuuri blushed.  “Kaasan!”

 

“Charmingly so,” Victor murmured warmly.

  
  


* * *

  
  


Yuuri studied the  [ link  ](https://travel.state.gov/content/adoptionsabroad/en/adoption-process/who-can-adopt/home-study-requirements.html) sent to him from Boris on home studies.  He also looked at the list of items that made a home more favorable for adoption.  “It’s a good thing you’re a Russian citizen, Vitya, or this could be impossible,” Yuuri mused.

 

Victor looked up from the paperwork he was looking through.  “We need to get a bigger place, though.  They need their own rooms.”

 

“Boris suggested we get an extra room and present as roommates for the paperwork to go through faster.”  Yuuri frowned as he looks up at Victor.  “Perhaps it’s a good thing our marriage isn’t recognized in Russia.”

 

“After it’s final, I can name you as co-guardian and we can arrange for you to adopt them as well.  It’s...political.  But...it’s also Russia.  Money paves the way.”

 

“Bribes?”

 

“Yes.  A few well placed bribes can make things happen.”

 

Yuuri frowned.  “That sounds illegal.”

 

Victor laughed.  “Perhaps.  It’s normal.  No one is going to fight us for the children.  So we only have to grease the wheels of approval.”

 

“Boris didn’t say anything about…”

 

“He can’t, Yuuri.  Not in writing especially.  He’s likely said too much as it is.  We’ll find a four bedroom house.  The win on that is that we have a place for Yuri when he wants to stay with us.”

 

“I’ll probably have to pack away...certain aspects of my life.  Maybe I should ship my shoes and other feminine items back here.”

 

“I’m sure we can store them in the gate house until we are ready for them.  Ivan and Dmitry are going to appeal to Lilia for the space once we vacate it.  I know they won’t mind.”

 

“What if it weirds out the kids?”  Yuuri’s brown eyes widened as he met Victor’s.

 

“It won’t,” Victor reassured him.  “Remember how Nina reacted to our being married.  They may have questions, but just answer them honestly.”

 

Yuuri drew a shaky breath in then dove into Victor’s arms.  “I didn’t realize how much I wanted this until we started talking about it.  I’m going to be heartbroken if they turn us down.”

 

“We’re more likely to be turned down for babies and easy to place kids.  These kids are hard to place, so they won’t look so hard at us.”

 

“I can’t help but think Boris has been planning this match all along.”

 

Victor grinned.  “I got that impression, too.”

  
  


* * *

  
  


Several people planned to join them in Tokyo and thus were piling at the airport together.  His parents left the inn in the hands of the same couple who had watched it while they were in Barcelona.  Yuuri fussed.  “You’re losing money.”

 

His mother laughed.  “It’s not like we have to support your skating costs these days.  We can do these things, now.  It lets us support you in other ways.”

 

“Are you sure?”

 

“Yes, son.  It’s going to be fine,” his father assured him quietly.

 

Their rooms were all around Yuuri’s and Victor’s.  His parents across the hall.  Minako and Mari on one side.  Takeshi and Yuuko on the other side with the triplets.  Minami and his parents were right next door to Yuuri’s parents.  Minami’s coach the next room over from them.  Yuuri was happy to see a few of the younger skaters he worked with last summer when they arrived at the first event.

 

“Katsuki-san!  Victor-san!”  They ran up to them excitedly and Victor couldn’t quite follow the rapid Japanese that ensued.  However, he had no trouble knowing the word autograph when the perfume ads were placed in their hands.  He was happily surprised when Yuuri signed the legs to his ads.

 

There was a fuss then Minami smirked.  “I told them it wouldn’t surprise me if those were Yuuri-san’s legs.”

 

* * *

  
  


Yuuri’s programs were perfection and he easily took first.  Minami came to their room after both performance days and asked for critiques.  “When you retire, Victor-san, perhaps you will coach me as well?” he suggested, eyes raised hopefully then flicking to Yuuri knowing he’d get Yuuri’s influence as well if Victor agreed.

 

Victor grinned.  “We’ll see.  After we get settled.  We have a couple of juniors that approached us last summer as well.”

 

“And we have to think about facilities,” Yuuri added.

 

“So it really is a ‘we’ll see’,” Minami stated hopefully.  “I’ll hold out, then.  I bet you make it through the next Olympics.”

 

“Barring any injury, yes.”

 

* * *

  
  
  


Sasaki greeted them with hot tea and Victor welcomed the familiar scent.  “So you aren’t returning for the winter as originally planned,” she surmised.

 

“No,” Victor murmured glancing towards Yuuri.  “We took a job assisting at my home rink in St. Petersburg and have agreed to continue until I retire.  I am thinking two more years.”

 

“We are also talking with a social worker about adopting a couple of kids.  One is fourteen and the other is five but has HIV.”

 

“Oh,” she responded thoughtfully.  “You’ll need a psych evaluation.  If you received two, even better.”

 

“You’d do that for us?” Victor asked with surprise.

 

“Of course.  Let’s talk about recent events, first.”

 

Victor frowned, preferring the other line of conversation.  “My kidnapping...it gives me nightmares but overall, I feel less stressed now than before.”

 

“Why is that?”

 

“Yuuri is safe...and I suppose, I feel safer.  They are caught, and the number of charges being piled on them, it’s likely they’ll never be free.”

 

“It will help in your healing.  Have you continued to be overprotective?”

 

Victor’s eyes widened with surprise.  “I...haven’t.  It’s like...now that they’ve been caught, I relaxed my hold on Yuuri.  I didn’t think anything about texting Yuuri to tell him I had an appointment the other day.  And Yuuri went to the gym and ended up at the children’s home.  I met them for dinner.  That’s how we met the kids.  But...I didn’t stress about Yuuri’s safety in the least.”

 

“I suspected it was more a reaction to the constant threat of danger.  Good.”  She took a sip and focused on Yuuri.  “How about you?”

 

“I feel...some guilt,” Yuuri confessed.  “I know it’s misplaced, though, and I’ve been working through it at the gym and on the dance floor.  I have an appointment with Abramovich when we return.  Victor’s nightmares wake me up sometimes but he sooths pretty quickly.  A song and a touch usually do the job.  As far as my regular anxiety goes, it’s lessened to manageable levels.  I think having Cocoa present helps.  She’s at my parents’ right now, but she continues to travel with us.”

 

“These children you are thinking to bring into your homes.  They are likely to bring struggles of their own.  The one, as you said, will need ongoing medical care.  And there could be psychological needs.”

 

“We are both very comfortable navigating those fields anymore.  Perhaps that’s something positive we can take from this last year.  We are now better equipped to deal with these issues and have the means to meet those needs,” Yuuri stated.

 

Victor nodded.  “I agree.  I’ve even worked out how to work our schedules around their needs.  We may have to split up in order to do it but...as Yuuri’s parents have said, most become parents unexpectedly.  I don’t believe…” he paused and met Yuuri’s eyes.  “Really, we don’t believe anyone else is going to step up and give these kids what they need.  We’d rather not wait for someone else to do it...especially if we have the means.  We’ve already connected with them.”

 

“It sounds like you are quite determined.  Well, those kids are lucky that you found them.  I have no problem writing up a positive psych evaluation.  I can tell you both are coming out on the other side.  Let me call Hashimoto and get him to write a letter up as well.”

 

“You’ll do that?” Yuuri said with surprise.  “Thank you.”

 

“I’m sure he’d be happy to do so.”  She made the call and as she hung up, she stated, “You can go by after you leave here.  He’ll have it waiting.”

 

An hour later they were on the train with two letters of recommendation from their psychiatrists as well as a current psych evaluation on each of them from Sasaki-sensei.  Yuuri was in shock at how easily everything was working through the process.

 

* * *

  
  


The day before they left was bittersweetness.  They met with the builder and directed the changes they wanted to see, approving of the next set of plans.  The family quarters would be expanded to accommodate the children and maybe a couple more.  The dorms were designed to meet learning and practice needs of the possible live-in students.  Three bathrooms were added as well as the two existing modernized.  The onsen workings were updated and a groundskeeper was contracted to handle the landscaping maintenance in their absence.

 

Meeting with Takeshi and Yuuko, they talked about expansion.  Takeshi’s eyes widened when he realized Victor and Yuuri’s vision to build an entire skate club in Hasetsu.  The goal was to have it operational when Victor retired, but they could handle delays.  Victor just wouldn’t take on additional students until they had the facilities to handle it.  As Victor outlined the needs, Takashi considered their options and they left to look at some sites.  They wanted the couple to be the managers of the facilities and they wouldn’t be surprised if other skaters they worked with coached from there as time went forward.

 

Yuuri visited with Minako to discuss the studio and what he wanted in the future if she was willing to lease or sell it to him.  She smirked.  “You’re going to push me to retire then what will I do?”

 

“Sell the bar and finally let yourself be happy,” Yuuri deadpanned.

 

Her eyes widened.  “Yuuri…”

 

“I know you came here because...you needed to escape a rough patch in your life, Minako-sensei.  Then I became your project and for that I’m grateful.  But in the process of that, you’ve neglected your own self.  You go to competitions under the guise of chasing figure skaters...when in reality there is only one that you want to chase.  Just...let yourself have him.”

 

“You knew?”

 

“That Coach Celestino only considered taking me on as a student because you made a call?  Absolutely.  Rumors of your relationship may be old but they aren’t dead.  I don’t know what happened, but I also can tell that there is still something between the two of you.”

 

“I just...I have a life here.  To pick up and move,” she moved anxiously through her words, her eyes and hands darting around.

 

Yuuri caught one of those hands in his.  “The apartment over the studio will always be yours but now it won’t be an anchor weighing you down.  You don’t have to agree now, though.  We won’t be able to move back for another couple of years.  That gives you plenty of time to decide.”

 

“Yuuri…”

 

“You need this.  It’s your turn to be happy,” Yuuri stated, a hand stroking her cheek.  She covered it with hers and pressed it against her skin and he could feel tears falling softly.  “You’ve chased after me for as long as I can remember.  You’re more of an aunt than a teacher.  It’s time to take care of yourself.”

 

* * *

  
  


That night, his mother hosted a send-off dinner, which, of course, featured katsudon.  Yuuri enjoyed a full serving and Victor stayed next to him the entire evening.  An arm rested constantly around his waist, a hand on his hip.  Yuuri only had to turn to rest his head on Victor’s shoulder.  So much was put into motion during their short visit and now it was time to return to Russia.  Victor already had a list started and Yuuri had been communicating with Boris about the kids.  It felt like...they had come to the other side of a long dark tunnel, and the brightness at the end was welcoming them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So to address some concerns (not all...because I don't want to spoil the story):
> 
> IF they just woke up one day and said let's go adopt a couple of kids, I'd agree...too soon. However, what is happening is Yuuri (and Victor) responding to a call for help from a friend. You and I both know how fiercely protective Yuuri is when it comes to his friends and once you're his, you will always be his. He can't NOT help. It's not in his nature. Victor is a strategist and as soon as he knows the direction of his husband's heart, he's going to try to figure out how to make it work. No, it won't be easy. But ask any parent. It never is. It's dedication. It's commitment. It's a whole lot of love. There will be good days and bad days. But sometimes you just know if you don't do this, you will regret it your whole life. 
> 
> So disagree if you want, this is what is right for my characters. I'd say trust me...I've said it all along. But if you are going to try to guilt me into changing the path, you might as well just stop right there. This is a well thought out choice...and you don't know where I'm going with this. 
> 
> However, that doesn't mean stop talking. I love hearing your thoughts and ideas. I even listen to the problems you. Some I've already got a plan in place to handle. Some may be a challenge they have to face. Some will remain in the land of "what if". Again, trust me. ;) Have I steered you wrong? I might point out...you're still reading. (And thank you for that!)


	46. Chapter 46

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victor works hard to rebuild his form and prepares to skate for Euros.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, readers! So, I'm currently out of Semicolon chapters. And things have been a bit busy with holidays and new teaching duties. I'll try to make it happen as soon as possible. 
> 
> The good news...this arc now means an extra five chapters on part three at the very least. I hate a rushed ending so this is necessary. :) I mean, I've got to get the kids settled.
> 
> Things may get a little teary in places. Just trust me.
> 
> Oh, and give all the love to Magrathea and BluSkates! They patiently put up with my whims. We've all been kind of crazy busy but things will be back in full swing soon. Life...it happens. ;)
> 
> Thank you for reading!

* * *

 

 

The team physician checked his range of motion once more.  Finally, he wrote notes on the chart.  Handing Victor the paper, his blue eyes lit up. _Cleared to skate._  “Thank you, Dr. Sokov!”  The old man waved him off.

 

When Victor handed the paper to Yakov, the old man grunted.  “Start slow and stretch out well.  Better than usual.  Have that husband of yours take you through his warm ups.  It’s the best routine I’ve seen.”

 

“Yes, sir!”  Victor practically skipped out of the office.  He found Yuuri and quickly told him the good news.  Yuuri took Victor’s hand and led him through his routine regardless that the older man knew it well; it had become one of Victor’s favorite things to watch...his Yuuri stretching, arching his back, pushing out his very firm, delightfully cute ass.  As he felt his muscles wake up, memory settling back into place, he found his feet, his music, his story.  Yuuri called his corrections and he was delighted that Yuuri’s confidence finally blossomed.  He laughed when he heard the blond Yuri call a correction or two.  Then Yakov growled and they backed off, Yuuri with a squeak and the younger Yuri likely with an eyeroll.

 

“Less than a month to EC,” he stated with a smile, pulling Yuuri into his arms at the end of the day.  Leaning in, he brushed a kiss next to his husband’s ear and whispered, “We didn’t let them win.”

 

“No, we did not,” Yuuri murmured back, his eyes closing as he felt Victor settled into his space.

 

* * *

  


Victor drove through the snowy streets to the treatment facility after dropping Yuuri off at the children’s home.  He wanted to stabilize his emotions before competitions began...and, more importantly, before the children arrived.  Entering the office, he checked in and was surprised to find the old doctor waiting on him in the lobby.

 

“Is everything alright?”

 

The psychiatrist smiled with reassuring warmth.  “Of course, Victor.  I thought we could take a walk before we begin.  Yes?”

 

“Okay,” Victor agreed reluctantly.  Abramovich was known to change tactics, though.  Victor fell into step and followed him to a room with mats spread across the floor.  The older man slipped off his shoes so Victor followed suit.  Then he followed the doctor’s lead until they were seated facing each other with their legs crisscrossed.  “Why are we here?”

 

“Sometimes a change of scenery does a world of good, don’t you think?” he asked with a wink.  

 

Victor couldn’t help the smile that tugged at his lips.  “I suppose not.  I mean, Yuuri goes to the gym and kickboxes with little Yuri and spends a lot of time at the children’s home.”

 

“And what do you do?”

 

Victor frowned.  “I...skate and work on my choreography.  I’m here three evenings a week.  And then there is the planning that goes with coaching Yuuri and helping Yakov.”

 

“What do you do for down time?”

 

“I...ummm...I read?”

 

“Which is good...but it seems like Yuuri is very active outside of skating.  I’m concerned that you are withdrawing from the world.”

 

“Has someone said something to you?”

 

The old man smiled benignly.  Victor nodded sharply.   _Yuuri._  He comes once a week, but their sessions were supposed to be separate.

 

“I don’t really know what to do with myself sometimes.  I want to be a good husband and soon I’ll be a father to those two kids.  I have looked at the best way to approach it, made lists and schedules so that no one will feel left out.  And then I have all of the expectations of skating.”

 

“And somewhere in the midst of all of this you’ve left yourself behind.” The older psychiatrist heard the edge of desperation in Victor’s tone, saw how overwhelmed the athlete before him looked.

 

Victor blinked in surprise.  Then he blinked again as he felt moisture gather around his lashes.  Yuuri was looking out for him.  He had heard the subtle urges to go to the gym or take a class or hang out with Ivan and Dmitry.  He even felt the urging to join Yuuri at the children’s home and to build a stronger relationship.

 

“I think...I’m afraid it’s all going to fall apart.  That they are going to say no.”

 

“You’ve been perched on the edge of disaster for so long that you’re waiting for the shoe to drop.”

 

Victor nodded sniffing back.  “I…”  He stuttered to a stop then began again.  “If I take care of everyone else, then maybe it won’t fall apart again.”  Then he stilled.  He heard this talk before.  Back in Hasetsu.  Even in Detroit.  “Oh…”

 

“The good and the bad happen whether we try to control it or not, Victor.  We have to learn to embrace the good and let go of the bad.  You...are still holding onto the bad.”

 

Victor drew a shaky breath.  “What do I do?” he whispered.

 

“Find an outlet.  Something that isn’t skating related.  Write, paint, take a yoga class, become involved in a project...but do something outside of yourself.  And...slowly start to let go of the pain.”

 

* * *

  
  


Victor watched Yuuri sleep.  Soft breaths pushed against the edge of the cotton sheet.  He smoothed his lover’s hair.  It had been so long since he had done this that it had taken him all evening to find what he was looking for.  He moved from his Yuuri’s side and lifted the old 35-mm camera.  It wasn’t digital.  He would order darkroom supplies the next day.  But there was something satisfying taking pictures of things that meant so much to him.  

 

He pulled on his coat and slipped out into the night air.  Makkachin came out with him happy to be off the lead and able to bound free.  They walked towards the pond behind the old mansion.  The moon was full.  In a few days, this pond would be full of life and he’d capture it again...in a different way.  Now, though, he wanted to capture the quiet.

 

As he heard the shutter snap, he felt the peace seep into his spirit.  Unhurried, a still image that would capture the silver of the night reflecting across the snow and ice.  The next shot brought a smile as Makka startled a rabbit out of hiding.  He caught the flurry of snow and the rabbit darting away.  Victor called the poodle back.  

 

“Why didn’t I get into this in Detroit?  I could have talked photography with Phichit, old girl.”

 

The poodle just looked up at him expectantly.  Victor turned back to the ice and snapped one more shot, this time catching an owl swooping across the field of vision.   _That rabbit may not make it after all._

 

With a shiver, Victor turned his feet back towards the gatehouse and the warmth of his lover.  He settled Makka down before slipping back into his pajamas.  As he snuggled up to Yuuri, he heard a cry of protest.  “Cold, Vitya!”  Yuuri turned sleepy eyes towards him.  Reaching up, he ran a hand down the frosty cheek.  “Are you okay?”

 

Victor nodded, his smile soft.  “I’m getting there.”

 

* * *

  
  


The couple joined the skate family for dinner at Lilia’s on January 6th to celebrate Christmas Eve.  Lenten bread, kutya, solyanka, sauerkraut, salad, dried fruit, potatoes, and beans rounded out the twelve dishes that Lilia explained to Yuuri represented the twelve apostles.  Yakov sipped his vodka and smiled in indulgent respect towards his wife’s beliefs.  Victor explained that the family would support the varying beliefs of their fellow family members, but Christmas eve and Christmas day dinner was something where they all came together for Lilia.  She laughed with delight when she received a set of lacquered nesting dolls where each one represented someone in their family, including Makkachin, Cocoa, and Yuri’s cat.  Victor smiled because he went with Ivan and Dmitry to have it commissioned.

 

They emerged to skate at midnight on the frozen pond behind the house with Yakov yelling the warning to not jump.  As if they didn’t know that already.  Still, they threw snowballs and laughed and the playful traditions of the Russian team endeared Yuuri’s heart.  Yuuri spotted Victor taking a few shots with his camera as things calmed a little.  Cocoa and Makkachin bounced and burrowed into the snow.  The cat watched with disdain from the upstairs window belonging to Yuri.

 

As they returned to warm up before the fire, hot chocolate was passed around to shake off the chill before they crept off to bed one by one until only Yuuri, Victor, Yakov and Lilia remained.  Victor took a sip from the coffee that replaced his chocolate.  “We are looking for a house,” Victor began quietly.

 

“Why?” Lilia asked startled.  “Do you not like the gatehouse?”

 

“We love it, Madame Lilia,” Yuuri reassured her.  “It’s just...we’re outgrowing it.”

 

“I don’t understand.  Yakov, explain this.”  She was clearly agitated.

 

“What are you boys about?” Yakov demanded.

 

Victor took a deep breath as he settled his cup on the table.  “Yuuri and I have become very attached to a pair of children from one of the homes.  We want to adopt them.”

 

“So we need a place that offers a separate room for each of them to make it easier to gain approval,” Yuuri expanded.

 

“Why haven’t you brought these children around?” Lilia demanded.  Yuuri and Victor exchanged glances.  They could feel her hurt at not being included.

 

“This has been a very recent transition,” Victor stated quietly.  “And we wanted to know that it was possible.  We’ve been talking with the social worker handling their case and an attorney.  We’ve gained statements from our psychiatrists.  We have statements of health from our physicians.  I know they will be talking with the two of you as we gave you both as personal references.”

 

“Of course we will give you both good references,” Yakov stated automatically.  “We wouldn’t give you so much responsibility at the rink otherwise.”

 

Victor smiled gratefully but grimaced as he started the real intent to this conversation.  “We need you...to downplay our relationship.  Boris knows but...he is trying to keep it from hanging up in the system,” Victor explained.  “We...are going to make it look like we are roommates.  In fact, we are looking for a four bedroom home.”

 

“You’ve been so public in your relationship.  How are you going to pull that off?” Lilia asked, concern lacing her voice.

 

“Boris is going to only scratch the surface on purpose,” Yuuri explained.  “He _wants_ us to give these kids a home.”

 

Yakov grunted impatiently.  “Well, tell us about them.  Do they skate?”

 

The couple chuckled.  “Well, not yet,” Victor stated.  “Nina’s young, just past five.  She’s got some health issues we’ll have to deal with.  Her brother Andrei is fourteen.”

 

“So old!” Lilia gasped.

 

“Perhaps, but...he’s worried about being separated from his sister and they want to move him to a transition home,” Yuuri explained.

 

“You’ve just been married,” Yakov pointed out.

 

“True...but as Yuuri’s parents pointed out, children rarely come as planned.  We just make room for them when they arrive.  They need us now, not when it’s convenient for us.”

 

Lilia and Yakov exchanged glances.  Finally, Yakov stated their final concern.  “Yuri is very attached to you both.”

 

“We know,” Victor agreed.  “We’re considering him in the process as well.”

 

Lilia folded her hands in her lap.  “Then just let us know how we can help.”

 

“We will.  Thank you.”

 

* * *

  
  


It was close to three in the morning when they took the snowy path back to their house.  “Let’s drag the blankets down and sleep in front of the fire,” Yuuri suggested.

 

“I think that is a perfect plan.”

 

As they reached their home, Victor busied himself making the fire.  Yuuri gathered bedding and finally stretched out on the feather mattress he unrolled on the floor.  Pillows piled up, quilts and blankets stretched across the surface then Victor pulling him down to lay next to him, hearing Yuuri’s giggle.

 

“You know we are going to have to be more reserved about this when the kids arrive,” Yuuri pointed out.

 

“You mean I won’t be allowed to kiss you in front of the babies?” he asked as he wrestled Yuuri down on his back, his knee wedging itself between the younger man’s leg.  He could feel Yuuri grind against him, his eyes shimmering in the firelight.

 

“No, you goofball!  I mean, no sex in the living room...or kitchen...or a family shared bathroom.”

 

Victor frowned as he considered those options.  “I guess that means we need to do a thorough job before they arrive.”  He then started tickling Yuuri and the younger man squealed under his touch pressing up against that thigh.  At some point, Yuuri stilled, breathless, and Victor’s hands splayed across his tummy.  Victor dipped down to brush their lips together, a wordless agreement fell between them.

 

Then hands were tugging at clothes and soon they lay naked tangled together, Yuuri beneath Victor, his hands tangled into silver hair, lips slanting together sloppily.  Victor’s hand slid down to tug at Yuuri’s half hard length to ease it along.  Yuuri continued to grab kisses, his fingers digging into the muscles of Victor’s ass.  Victor reached for something tucked under his pillow and then Yuuri felt the package of lube in his hand.

 

Yuuri glanced over and raised his eyebrow as Victor pulled himself off Yuuri and stretched out beside Yuuri, his knees pulled up beneath him.  Yuuri rolled over and pushed up on his hands, trailing his fingers down Victor’s spine.  He heard Victor’s moan as he started to tease open his entrance.  “Is this what you want, sweetheart?” Yuuri murmured softly.

 

“Mmmhmmm,” he responded, his eyes closed as he focused on Yuuri’s touch.  The younger man very thoroughly worked him open, and then he felt the press of Yuuri’s head against his stretched opening, teasing him for a moment until Victor pressed back and begged him, “Please.”  Those words were followed by a low groan as he felt the stretch of Yuuri pressing into him.

 

Yuuri held Victor still for a moment, pressing a kiss between the older man’s shoulder blades.  “I love you,” he whispered.  He heard Victor’s sigh and felt a smile touch his lips.  Rising up, he rested his hands on the older man’s hips.  “Are you ready?”

 

“Yes, my Yuuri...please.”  And then Yuuri was moving in him steadily filling him then pulling almost out until the pistoning had Victor moaning in broken breaths.  “I’m so close,” he he gasped.  Yuuri’s hand reached around with one hand and he felt it sliding down his length.  Victor’s breath stuttered as he sought the traction and then he spilled into Yuuri’s hand and the towel beneath him.  Yuuri found his release moments later.

 

Yuuri gently lowered him to his side pressing a kiss into his shoulder.  He pulled away to Victor’s protest but quickly returned to clean him up, pulling the blanket over the silver haired man to keep him warm.  As Yuuri relaxed back into his arms, contentedly snuggling close, Victor frowned.  “We really are an old married couple.”

 

Yuuri laughed.  “Why do you say that?”

 

“We don’t even get creative.  Just fall together and have lazy sex.”

 

“Does it always have to be a show?” Yuuri teased.

 

“I just don’t want to lose the romance,” Victor pouted.

 

Yuuri nuzzled up into Victor’s embrace, his lips brushing just beneath Victor’s ear.  “Every moment with you is romance, Vitya,” he promised.

 

Victor found it hard to maintain his frown with Yuuri’s attention on his ear.  Finally, he sighed and settled in next to his lover.  At some point, the dogs snuffled in close enjoying the shared warmth.

 

* * *

  
  


Yuuri finished stretching out next to Yuri and Mila before releasing them for the evening.  As the boys dressed in the men’s dressing room, Yuuri seemed in a hurry.  “Where are you going?” the younger Yuri asked.

 

“To the children’s home,” Yuuri responded, combing through freshly showered hair.  “And you?”

 

“I guess...home.  You seem to be going there a lot these days.  I thought...maybe we could go to the gym or do something else.”

 

“Maybe next time?  I already have plans tonight.”  Yuuri pulled the shirt over his head, missing the look the younger man cast and the tone in his voice which all begged for more attention.

 

Yuri huffed as he watched the older man leave.  He shoved on his earphones and turned the music up loud.  As he stomped down the stairs, he caught Victor looking up from where he was unlacing his skates.  He could feel the old man’s frown but at the moment, he didn’t care.   _It’s not like Katsudon or the old man care about me anymore.  They are too busy with other people or each other._  He continued towards the door and climbed into the van.

 

He only registered mild surprise when Victor climbed into the driver’s seat.   _It appears Katsudon has left the old man behind as well tonight._  Victor drove the skaters home talking with Georgi who occupied the passenger front seat.  Yuri failed to catch the furtive glances in the rearview mirror.

 

The others piled out and hurried into the house but Yuri lingered, kicking the snow as he approached the main house.  A garden shed stood between the garage and the house.  He glared at it as if it had caused some insult then pulled back preparing to take a fist through the wood.  Only he felt a hand catch his.  Looking back to see who held onto him, he spotted the old man.  “Let me go!” he demanded.

 

Victor wrapped an arm around Yuri and tugged him along, past the main house and towards the gate house.  “I think someone is feeling a bit neglected,” Victor pointed out.

 

“It’s not like he didn’t abandon you tonight as well.”

 

“Perhaps you can keep me company.  We can pull out the Playstation and play _Bloodborne_ ,” Victor suggested with a raised eyebrow.

 

It had been a while since they played games together.  Yuri eyed him cautiously.  “You suck at games.”

 

“Yuuri says the same.  I still enjoy watching and I help when I can,” Victor stated pointedly.

 

“You mean you backseat game,” the blond muttered under his breath.  Still, he followed Victor inside.

 

As the boy prepared the game system, Victor busied himself in the kitchen while texting back and forth with the older Yuuri.  He then brought snacks into the living room and offered some to Yuri.

 

“Is that bacon wrapped peppers?”

 

“Yes.  Stuffed with cheese.  It’s something Phichit showed me when I was in America.”

 

“They wrap everything in bacon back there,” Yuri pointed out.

 

“You’re not wrong,” Victor agreed.

 

They were heavy into the third fight with Victor calling out directions and the blond, wisely, ignoring them when Yuuri arrived carrying takeout.  “I seem to have missed the appetizers,” he teased even as he placed a pizza box on the coffee table.

 

The blond looked from the box to Yuuri.  “That’s not on our diet.”

 

Yuuri winked and brought a finger up to his lips in a hush.  “I won’t tell if you won’t tell.”

 

Yuuri soon joined in beside the blond and they were arguing over the best tactics.  Victor sat back watching the scene, happy to see the boys getting along once more.  Pizza demolished along with cheddar peppers, Victor cleaned up in the background before pulling out the bedding so that Yuri could stay the night on their couch.  He made up the bed in the background then made a show of going to bed himself calling the dogs up.  It was another hour before Yuuri joined him.

 

“Thanks for telling me how upset he was.  I knew he wanted to hang out and tried to tell him I could make plans with him later.”

 

“We just have to be careful not to push him aside.  He only has his grandfather...and he looks to us as family even if he doesn’t admit it.”

 

“I know.  I suppose I’ve been spending a lot of time with the kids.  I need to find balance.”

 

“Perhaps visit them every two or three evenings rather than every day after we finish up,” Victor suggested.  “They’ll be ours soon enough.”

 

“Has someone else been feeling neglected, too?  You could join me.”

 

“I’m having to make up for lost time on the ice or I would.  But I could make a schedule like I suggested.  And that would allow us to spend time with Yuri and Mila as well as the others.  Okay?”

 

“Okay, Vitya.  I hear you and I’ll do better.  You know how I get focused on one thing and sometimes neglect everything else.”

 

“I know...that’s why I’m saying something.  Now, snuggle in close because I’m cold.”

 

Yuuri quickly followed his bidding, burying his nose into the curve of Victor’s neck.


	47. Chapter 47

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> EC, a night out, and a day in court.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for the support from readers and friends. I really appreciate it. Writing these stories are an emotional process. Special thanks to my friends/editors Magrathea and BluSkates.
> 
> And it has occurred to me that I'm so many chapters ahead on this that I'm going to give you some extra Lifeline chapters this week and next while I build up some Semicolon chapters. I may be out of town for the holiday, however, so maybe one on Wednesday, and one on Saturday? That should do it. ;) Enjoy!

* * *

 

Yuuri walked back into their bedroom and frowned at the dress and shoes laid out to be packed.  “Vitya?”

 

Victor came back into the room and grinned.  “Chris and I have planned a night out for us before we catch our flights home.  Although, I hear Chris is following Phichit to Thailand.”

 

“Yes...that’s what they have planned.  Phichit is introducing Chris to his parents.”

 

“How is that going to go?”

 

Yuuri grinned and shrugged.  “They all came to move him in when we became roommates in Detroit.  They are very happy and friendly...like Phichit.  So anything or anyone that makes Phichit happy makes them happy.”

 

“Do they know he’s gay?”

 

Yuuri’s eyes widened in surprise.  “He’s not...more pansexual.  He doesn’t even consider gender or any of that.  But I don’t think Phichit hides his preferences from his parents.  They seemed very accepting.”

 

“How...did your parents react?”  Victor seemed uncertain and Yuuri turned in surprise.

 

“They love you, Vitya!”

 

He shrugged sheepishly.  “I know, Yuuri...but when you came out.  How did that happen?”

 

Yuuri snorted.  “I think they knew I had more than a crush on my idol.  Mari knew...I was different I think before they did.  I would sit in her room when I was younger and play with her shoes.  Her dresses intrigued me and I’d hold them up to me to see how they would look.  She didn’t say anything beyond ‘You mess that up, twerp, and I’ll kick your ass.’”

 

Victor snorted.  “I’m surprised Mari had dresses.”

 

“She has a wide variety of clothes but she’s always working.  I wish she had more personal time.  But...I guess she’s happy.  I’ve never heard her complain.”

 

“You still didn’t answer my question,” Victor pressed.

 

“I don’t know that there was a defining moment because...I just was.  And they seemed to know before I said it openly.”

 

“I wish I had that,” he murmured quietly.  Yuuri waited, but Victor didn’t feel ready to open up.  He grinned, changing the topic.  “I can’t wait to see you in those shoes.”

 

Yuuri seemed to accept the transition.  He wrapped an arm around Victor’s neck and pulled him into a kiss.  “And what will you be wearing?”

 

Victor winked.  “It’s a surprise.”

 

“I haven’t worn this dress in some time.  It’s so...glitzy.”

 

“I haven’t seen you in it, either.  I can’t wait!”

 

Yuuri’s fingers thumbed the fabric a soft smile touching his lips.  “One last time to play before I put these away for a while.”

 

“Only a short while, love...for the kids.”

 

Yuuri hugged himself.  It wasn’t a hard decision to temporarily closet this part of himself.  He wanted Andrei and Nina more.  The more time they spent together, the more real that desire became.

  
  


* * *

  
  


**European Figure Skating Championship -- Bratislava, Slovakia**

 

Yuuri and Victor found their way into the hotel room, Cocoa happy to move more freely.  She explored the space and sniffed before drawing close to Yuuri and sitting at his feet.  They unpacked their belongings and it was then that Yuuri spied the black dress.  He arched an eyebrow towards Victor.

 

“I haven’t...not in a long time.  But Chris suggested it.  It seemed a good idea but now I’m nervous.  I had long hair before.  And now...well, I have a wig.”

 

Yuuri smiled softly.  “You’ll look beautiful...as always.”

 

Victor carried their shower and makeup bags into the bathroom.  Yuuri busied himself stripping out of his travel clothes.  “Shower, Vitya?”

 

“I was thinking the same thing.  I’ll get the water started,” his husband called from the bathroom.  “Join me?”

 

In the shower, they held close to one another, sloppy kisses and soapy attention to their travel aches.  They then dried one another off before stumbling into bed.  Their schedules had been so packed that sleep seemed a necessity.  As they tangled into one another skin to skin, they welcomed the comfort of the other’s warmth.

 

Cocoa found her way next to Yuuri at some point. Yuuri eventually shifted around to be spooned by Victor and wrap his arms around Cocoa, whispering soft words into her fur.  She huffed and shifted but allowed his hold.  They remained wrapped up like that until morning.

 

Victor, of course, rose first and Cocoa shifted only as much as her discipline allowed until Victor called her.  She then jumped down and waited patiently as the lead was attached.  He took her out and gave her time to take care of her business, grabbing breakfast on the way back up.  He passed Chris in the hallway, his friend’s hazel eyes smiling but both were still too close to sleep to do much conversing.  Entering his room, he found Yuuri stretching and the arch of his husband’s back held his attention.  Yuuri turned to face him frowning.

 

“You have too many clothes,” he complained.

 

“Well...we have a dog to see to and I brought breakfast,” Victor supplied with an amused expression.

 

“I guess I’ll forgive you then.”  He reached towards Victor and the older man didn’t know if he was after him or the food.  He kicked off his shoes and moved across the room to settle in next to Yuuri. The breakfast was simple just as Yuuri liked it, the habit now instilled in Victor.  Once the breakfast was cleared, Yuuri stretched out lazily, making no effort to cover himself or his desire.

 

“I have practice in an hour,” Victor pointed out.  Yuuri pouted in response but didn’t press.  “Raincheck?”

 

“I want you here.  In this bed.  After practice.  Do not make lunch dates.”

 

Victor chuckled.  “My baby is horny...I wouldn’t dream of it.”  With a wink, he disappeared into the bathroom to get ready for the day.   Yuuri finally stumbled in a few minutes later, naked and beautiful getting ready next to one another, bumping into each other as they invaded one another’s spaces.  Half an hour later, a knock on the door let them know Yakov was waiting.  Yuuri was slipping on his shoes as Victor opened the door.

 

Practice went slowly...Victor keeping his movements lowkey.  Several asked Yuuri about Victor’s injuries and he assured them that he was cleared to skate.  Finally he broke away and went to his husband whom he had watched critically.

 

“You are stiff in your shoulder.  We need to stretch that better,” he pointed out.

 

Yakov echoed that sentiment.  He handed them an address.  “Take him here.  Mention my name and the owner will give you studio space.  Stretch him well and run him through his choreography.”

 

“Hai,” Yuuri agreed with a sharp bow.  They left and half an hour later found themselves at the studio.  The owner led them to a small space where they could work, and Yuuri began breaking down his stretches.  Victor knew Yuuri wouldn’t go easy on him.  Slowly, steadily, they worked out the stiffness.  “We probably should switch sides in bed for a while,” Yuuri suggested.  “You tend to lie on your arm.”

 

Victor frowned.  “Good idea.  It doesn’t hurt when I lie down.  Just as I’m waking up.  I feel the stiffness set in over night.”

 

“We’ll set the alarm a little earlier tomorrow and work through stretches before leaving.  I forgot how early your practice was this morning or I would have suggested it then.”

 

“It’s okay.  They are all eying me to see if I will fail.  I don’t want to fail but what if it’s too soon?”  Victor winced, hearing the fear in his voice and was uncomfortable with the unfamiliar response to the ice.

 

“You are doing fine,” Yuuri assured him, running a hand up the broad bicep.  “We just have to take a little extra time to make sure you don’t injure yourself.”

 

* * *

  
  
  


By the time Victor skated his short, Yuuri had worked the stiffness out of him via traditional and...less traditional methods.  Chris stepped up behind the Japanese man and purred, “I may have to find out more about your physical therapy methods.  They sounded...quite pleasurable.”

 

Yuuri’s cheeks burned but he didn’t turn, his eyes remained trained on his husband.  “That was the reward,” he said instead.  “The work comes before hand...and that I’d be happy to show you.  We stretch again in the morning at six.”

 

Chris sipped his water thoughtfully.  “I’m always open to exchanging training skills.  Six a.m.?  Where?”

 

“We’ll knock and you can join us.  There is a studio Yakov arranged.  Bring Phichit.  He’s just a ray of sunshine that early in the morning.”

 

Chris chuckled.  “He says the same about you, you know.”

 

Yuuri quirked a smile his direction.  “I know.”

 

Victor finished first in the short program by a narrow margin.  He didn’t look happy, but only those who knew him best would realize it.  “I’m losing points on interpretation,” he said under his breath.

 

“What’s on your mind?” Yuuri asked softly.

 

“The trial.  And I’m feeling my anger bunch up in my muscles.  Do you think they’ll let us use the studio for you to work out my aches this evening?”

 

Yuuri pulled the studio up on his phone.  “All we can do is ask.”

 

* * *

  
  


Victor lay stretched out beneath Yuuri, a sheen of sweat covering his lover’s body.  Yuuri was now fully seated on Victor.  His husband watched him breathing through the stretch.  Yuuri hadn’t ridden him in some time.  But Victor loved watching him as much as the feeling of him.  Victor’s hands rested on Yuuri’s hips but the younger man wanted full control.  As Yuuri began to move, Victor had to resist the desire to buck into him.  And oh, did he want to.

 

Yuuri could be torturous in his movements.  Excruciatingly slow stretching out the sensation followed by several quick movements.  The pace always changing kept Victor’s body unwired.  He couldn’t find the rhythm.  He was forced to allow his lover to control the pleasure.  A dip down for a kiss and Victor reached for more only to have Yuuri tease his arms away. It was as if  _ Eros  _ was being performed in his lap and Victor could feel himself close to coming undone.

 

Then Yuuri leaned forward and whispered in his ear, his breath hot and sultry against Victor’s ear, “Touch me.”

 

Victor’s hand found Yuuri’s length.  With steady strokes, he noted Yuuri had steadied the pace of his hips.  And then it all came undone at once, Victor’s cry of Yuuri’s name, Yuuri slipping into a string of unintelligible Japanese, his release across Victor’s chest, the vibrations milking Victor’s orgasm.  Then Yuuri collapsed across his chest, breathless against Victor’s pulse point, Victor’s arms wrapping around him.

 

They remained until they couldn’t, the stickiness demanding attention, the unshed condom demanding attention.  They finally parted just enough to get out of bed and stumble to the bathroom.  Victor dropped the condom off and started the shower.  He turned to see Yuuri slide down the wall his legs drawn up to his chest.  He quickly switched the shower to bath and started to lift his husband but Yuuri protested.

 

“I’ve got this.  My legs are just shaky.”  Yuuri pushed up accepting help from the arm attached to his good shoulder.  Victor guided him down into the tub then settled down next to him, a towel under his knees as he leaned over the edge of the tub.  Yuuri finally gave him a smirk.  “I guess I pushed it just a bit.”

 

“It was hot to say the least.  I’d swear you were skating to…”

 

“Eros?” Yuuri asked with his eyebrow raised.

 

Victor chuckled.  “You are sweet music to my soul.”

 

* * *

  
  


Phichit, playing coach’s assistant, stood next to Celestino.  Yuuri stood close to Yakov.  Both of them watched Victor with sharp gazes, calculating points as he went.  He was still not in full form but he could very well pull off the win.  Chris currently sat in first.  Michele in second.  Then Victor’s signature quad flip.  He landed it but there was a wobble that caused a gasp from the audience.  Victor took two three turns to steady the landing glide and shook it off, continuing through the program.

 

The morning stretches were helping, but they needed to do more.  Yuuri could see stiffness in his movements.  He heard Yakov curse under his breath and then the second jump in the combination Yuuri saw it.  The shakiness, a hesitation on take off.  They abstained from sex last night.  Yuuri held onto him and whispered soft words to sooth him and relax him.  He pulled out the massage oil and worked down his muscles.

 

Still, Victor seemed...worn.  The nightmares and worries of the trial warred against the recent injuries.  But Victor fought on and he pulled a final jump out his ass much to Yuuri and Yakov’s surprise.  The older man chuckled.  “That’s a good boy,” he praised softly under his breath.  “Keep fighting.”

 

Victor stood on the podium, gold around his neck, a single point separating him from Chris thanks to that final jump.

 

* * *

  
  
  


Yuuri stepped out of the bathroom and turned on the balls of his feet so that his back faced Victor.  “Zip me up?”

 

It took a moment for Victor to recover his faculties and agree.  “You look amazing in this  [ dress ](https://pc-ap.renttherunway.com/productimages/nomodel/1080x/e0/DTP3.jpg) .”  In truth, the sequins that faded from blue to pink skimmed his body beautifully.  Victor chose well.  And the matching  [ shoes  ](https://i.pinimg.com/236x/83/ee/ce/83eecef45b06379ebf831baa36d755b0--peacock-wedding-boho-wedding.jpg) added to the effect.

 

As Yuuri turned to study his fiance in appreciation, he asked, “Is sequins the theme?”

 

“Mmmhmmm.  Chris and I both decided.  I haven’t wore anything like this in years, though,” Victor fussed, tugging at the black  [ dress  ](https://pc-ap.renttherunway.com/productimages/nomodel/1080x/42/DTP1.jpg) with geometric patterns opening into a sheer fabric that was lined in a flesh toned shell.  Yuuri pulled his hands away and stretched them out to his side as he straightened the fabric and settled the lines.

 

“You are fighting it.  Just let it be,” Yuuri directed.

 

Victor twirled some of the strands of the wig uncertainly around his finger.  It was certainly good quality.  Yuuri settled him down and did the finishing touches on his makeup.  Victor turned to look in the mirror and felt suddenly more settled in the capable hands of his husband.

 

Yuuri pointed towards the door.  “Now go get your shoes and do a test walk.”

 

Victor slid his feet into the louboutin black  [ heels  ](https://assetsprx.matchesfashion.com/img/product/1075414_3_large.jpg) with the signature hint of red and turned to do a runway walk before Yuuri.  His husband whistled appreciatively.  “I guess I haven’t lost it.”

 

“If you wore them before, it doesn’t take long to get back into it.  Now where did you find those shoes?” Yuuri demanded appreciatively.

 

“You like?”

 

Yuuri arched an eyebrow as if to say  _ are you kidding? _

 

A knock on their door informed them that their friends were ready.

 

* * *

  
  
  


They stood in line to enter the underground venue when Yuuri turned to talk to Phichit only to pause and stare at Chris.  “Does that  [ dress  ](https://shop.nordstrom.com/s/dress-the-population-emery-scoop-back-reversible-sequin-body-con-dress/4730312?country=US&currency=USD&cm_mmc=google-_-shopping_ret-_-662927179-_-33067301429_891177d7-934a-4800-abc3-0e927c7684d8&cm_mmca1=pla-258647103359_13107233&gclid=CjwKCAiA3JrQBRBtEiwAN7cEGrEs3a4g7cBHFz5GhFwXoSmn2SsfNMDGt07O2BLwv3TSTgXs4VrCsRoC98AQAvD_BwE) change colors?”

 

Chris grinned.  “Yep!  At the brush of the hands.”  He proceeded to demonstrate by placing handprints over his breast.  Victor draped an arm over Yuuri’s shoulder and smiled in amusement.

 

Phichit rolled his eyes.  “He also has a pair of dance  [ shorts ](https://i2.wp.com/novelty-gift-ideas.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/07/sequin-shorts3.gif?resize=500%2C450&ssl=1) made like that.”

 

Yuuri’s eyes narrowed as did Victor’s.  The Japanese man voiced the words first.  “It comes in dance shorts?”

 

Phichit grinned.  “I’ll send you a link.”

 

As they moved up in line, Yuuri leaned in and whispered, “I may have thought of a way around the rules.”

 

“So the dance floor…”

 

“A perfect place for...alternative expression.”

 

Victor chuckled quietly.  “I have a feeling I’m going to be working more and more in that studio.”

 

Phichit shivered, his champagne pink sequin  [ dress ](http://www.thedresshome.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/03/long-sleeve-backless-sequin-dress.jpg) backless...a feature Chris was readily taking advantage of as his hands explored the bare surface.  They weren’t outside much longer as the line shifted and soon they were underground.

 

“So how did you even find out about this?” Yuuri asked.

 

“This party shifts every month and we just arrived at the right time for the ball,” Chris explained.

 

As they entered, Yuuri smiled appreciatively, his eyes glittering as he took in the beauties dressed in all manner of dresses from formal ball to more elegant attire.  Victor’s hand rested on his hip keeping Yuuri close but the Japanese man had no intentions of leaving Victor’s side.

 

Within an hour, though, his husband was at ease and loosening his hold on Yuuri.  They danced, traded partners, and enjoyed the evening.  Yuuri held to only two glasses of champagne and Victor settled on water, watching out for his friends for the night.  Besides, he enjoyed seeing Chris happy and Phichit teasing him with enchanting movements.

 

An arm slipped around his neck and he settled his gaze on a much more pleasant view.  Warm brown eyes simmered as Yuuri’s smile teased him with promises of later.  They fell easily into a dance, very much in one another’s space but knowing each other so well they followed without thought.

 

As the evening wound down, Victor and Yuuri managed to wrangle the other two very tipsy friends into a cab and climbed in after with directions to the hotel.  They had to guide them to the elevator and it was a good thing they had adjoining rooms as was now a habit because they ended up having to put them both in their room.

 

Finally alone, Yuuri kicked off his heels and walked over to pull his own surprise out of hiding.  A nicely chilled bottle of wine and two glasses.  Victor hummed appreciatively accepting his first drink of the night.

 

“I had fun tonight,” Yuuri murmured.

 

“We may have to be creative but we can still have fun after the kids are ours,” Victor promised.  He took a drink and settled the wine glass on the table nearby, Yuuri following his movements.  He then pulled Yuuri into his arms.  Soon Yuuri’s ear rested on his chest and Victor hummed softly as they swayed back and forth into an easy waltz.  Their steps took them to the edge of the bed where they helped one another out of their dresses.  Yuuri’s hands fingered through the wig.  It was good quality and matched the color of Victor’s hair well.  “I never thought about wearing a wig,” he murmured.

 

“Your hair is full and beautiful,” Victor countered softly.

 

“Your hair is also beautiful.  But...I’d love to have you fuck me with that wig on.”

 

Victor chuckled.  “I don’t look the same as at eighteen,” he pointed out.

 

“My fourteen year old self will be satisfied with what he can get,” Yuuri argued.

 

Victor played with the length.  “When it was long, I liked to have it pulled.  Not hard.  Just enough to...direct me.”

 

Yuuri grinned.  “I know you like to be...directed,” he agreed softly.  It was something they encountered more and more.  Victor worked so hard to control the world around him that to have that control removed, that sense of responsibility relieved, sometimes helped Victor to relax more and enjoy their love making that much more.  Yuuri’s expression softened.  “Do you need that now?”

 

Victor shook his head slowly.  “I just need you.  The next few days are going to be emotional and I just want to ground us to each other.”  He leaned in and captured Yuuri’s lips becoming vaguely aware that Yuuri’s fingers were tangling into the wig.

 

Yuuri leaned in and became more demanding in his kisses.  Victor answered them, tongue and teeth deepening the hunger.  Victor pulled Yuuri into his lap and he felt those hips grind into him seeking friction as Victor’s hands enjoyed the feel of his husband’s ass in his hands.  “God, you’re beautiful when you’re turned on like this,” Victor hissed.  “Do you need me...inside?”

 

Yuuri pulled back and studied Victor for a moment.  It wasn’t dirty talk.  “What do you need, Vitya?”

 

“I need you to fuck me,” he groaned.

 

Yuuri smiled, his expression soft.  “As long as we can face each other.  That’s what I need...your eyes, your expression, your touch.”

 

Victor shifted back pulling Yuuri with him until he laid back into the pile of pillows.  Yuuri leaned towards the table.  He found the lube and knew it would take a little longer to open Victor up.  They often switched depending on who was in competition but there was that gray area where it could go either way.  Yuuri knew his husband was still emotionally raw.  It was evident in his skating.  And even though he said he didn’t need Yuuri to direct him, Yuuri could see that Victor needed him to be in control.

 

Victor closed his eyes as he felt Yuuri’s finger tease his entrance, the gentle pressure and then that finger sliding into him.  He knew he was tense and he’d be harder to open up for it.  He needed the release that comes from being thoroughly fucked, the muscle relaxation, the pleasing ache reminding him of Yuuri’s presence.  He gasped as he felt the second finger slip inside.  Yuuri would be thorough, stretching him, making sure he didn’t hurt him.  They were the same like that.  The other always came first.

 

“Vitya, look at me,” Yuuri directed.  Victor smiled.  Of course he would take a commanding tone.  His lovely husband recognized he needed it even if he denied it.  Victor fluttered his eyes open and met Yuuri’s eyes.  “Are you okay?”

 

Victor nodded but knew that when Yuuri took this tone he had to say it.  He reached into the recesses of his mind and dragged the words forward.  “Y-yes...I’m okay.”

 

Yuuri leaned forward and brushed his lips over Victor’s.  “Keep talking to me, sweetheart.  I need to hear your words.”

 

“It’s hard...today.  Too much…”  He touched his heart and then he felt the dampness spill down his cheeks.  “Need you.”

 

“I know, love.  I’m not going to leave you.  I’ll take good care of you,” Yuuri murmured, the cadence of his words calming and reassuring.  Victor smiled hoping it would be enough.  Yuuri leaned forward and brushed kisses over the tracks of his tears, not pushing for more at the moment.

 

At some point during this tenderness, Victor realized a third finger had been introduced and his lips parted at the pleasure of that stretch.  He then felt those fingers brushing against his prostate pulling a moan from those lips.

 

Yuuri smiled, no smirking, just tenderness.  He wanted to thoroughly love his husband, to make him feel safe and secure.  They were both afraid of the coming week but Yuuri pushed it aside and focused on this moment.  He continued to bring those moans of pleasure from Victor even as he reached for the condom with his free hand, tearing the package with his teeth.  Victor released a cry of complaint when he pulled his hand free.  It was always like that...they were greedy...wanting to hold on to the previous pleasure while demanding the next.

 

The condom in place, he leaned forward over his lover.  “Are you ready for me?” he whispered softly.

 

Victor nodded but then caught the sharp glance from his lover.  “Y-yes.”

 

Yuuri slowly sank into him, Victor’s legs falling impossibly further open to receive him.  Yuuri had mastered how to take him in one slow, steady movement with the proper preparation.  Finally, Yuuri was deep within him and Victor breathed through the feelings, both physical and emotional.

 

“I’m a mess,” he finally stated.

 

Yuuri smiled tenderly.  “I know.  But I’m going to take care of you.”  He then began slow, steady movements.  Unlike the last time, Yuuri’s rhythm was easy like the seductive music Yuuri would dance to when they were alone.  The rotation of his hips a slow rock and grind...Victor needed this.  He could feel himself letting go.  Yuuri must have realized it, too.  “Are you still with me, love?”

 

Victor nodded reaching his hands to Yuuri and giving those fingers a squeeze.  They had unspoken language.  When Yuuri learned he, too, sometimes fell into this state, he made sure they could communicate.  Yuuri continued to rock into him, slow, shallow movements dragging across his prostate just right.

 

The orgasm rose into him like a slowly rising tide.  He was in the midst of it before he could put words to it.  “Y-yuuri,” he cried out softly.

 

“I know.  I’ve got you, baby.  Let it go.”

 

Victor came hard untouched, his body shaking around Yuuri.  Yuuri continued to stroke into him and then he watched Yuuri’s eyes close, his body tightening as he found his own release.  “So...beautiful,” Victor breathed.

 

Yuuri curled him up on his side, knees brought up and blanket settled around him.  He patted the space behind Victor and Cocoa was there.  Finally, he whispered, “I’ll be right back.  I’m just going to clean you up.”

 

Victor peeked from beneath his lashes then nodded.

 

Yuuri wasn’t gone long.  He returned with a cloth warm and damp and washed away the cum that covered his chest.  He then took another cloth and wiped away the tears and the makeup that ran down his face.

 

“Oh, god!  I forgot about the makeup,” Victor said suddenly.  “I must look ghastly!”

 

Yuuri chuckled.  “We’ve both been worse.”  He tossed the wet cloths in the corner then settled down next to Victor.  “Thank you for sharing this part of yourself with me.”

 

“It was...nice to do this.  But it makes me feel...vulnerable.”

 

“I know.  But there is a certain beauty that comes out in that vulnerability.”

 

“I see it in you...all the time.  I wanted..to return it to you.”  Victor closed his eyes digging for his words.  “You...take good care...of me.”

 

Yuuri leaned forward and brushed his lips against Victor’s forehead.  “Sleep for me, Vitya.  We travel tomorrow and you need your rest.”

  
  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  
  
  


Yuuri sat nervously next to Victor in the courtroom.  Looking up at his husband, he whispered, “I know I said I wanted to do this but...I’m scared.”

 

“Just be strong...we both will probably feel torn to pieces when it’s over.  We’ll pick them up together.”

 

“When the prosecution rehearsed me, I remembered things I didn’t share.”

 

“There are things I didn’t share, either, Yuuri.  It will be fine.  I trust you.”

 

Yuuri smiled bittersweetly.  “I know that...and I trust you.  That’s not the point.  I just...I hate hurting you.  I know things done to me hurts you.”

 

“Same.  I’ve already arranged for us to meet with Dr. Abramovich once this is over.  He said that we may need to go back through a short burst of EMDR after it’s over.  He said it’s normal.  So I’m going to trust him in this.”

 

As it was, Yuuri was asked to recount the events of the rape to the best of his ability.  There were a few inconsistencies between his current words and his original statement and these were clarified.  The defense attorney asked him nothing.  Yuuri blinked in surprise but then was released.  Returning to the side of his husband, he could see Victor’s serene expression but he also spotted the ravages of his pain, his red eyes, his sorrow.

 

Victor’s experience on the stand was a bit more draining.  Yuuri listened to his words and heard the threats that were made towards him while Victor was held prisoner as well as the abuses he suffered.  He blinked back some of the tears, but more fell despite his efforts.  He understood Victor’s red eyes now.  When Victor returned to him, they slipped out of the courtroom.

 

Victor pulled him into an embrace.  “It’s going to be okay.  We just have to go through it to get to the other side.”

 

“I don’t want to watch any of this.  I don’t even know if I want to return for the sentencing.  It...hurts too much, Vitya.”

 

“Let’s go home, then.  We can deal with our pain in the way we know best.”

 

Yuuri nodded wordlessly.  He just wanted to hold his husband close and keep him tight in his heart.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no intentions of getting heavily into the court trial. I hated my business law class and do not relish getting into trial law. I don’t have the language for it. I could never figure out which direction the court would go with matters.


	48. Chapter 48

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nina and Phichit need love. Oh, and 4CC.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy holiday! I'm out until weekend but enjoy this little segment.
> 
> The story told by Yuuri poked into the beginning is unbeta'd. A little peek into Yuuri's past.
> 
> The rest, however, has been properly cared for by BluSkates and Magrathea. If you haven't read their stories, pop over and do so. Thanks for reading!

* * *

 

They had little time back home before they would leave again, this time for Four Continents.  A visit to Dr. Abramovich, in which he laid out their next course of therapy and helped steady them for the time being, came first.  Yuuri practiced and was given his own ice for the next three days as he was the only one heading to Taipei, Taiwan.  The others shared the other practice rinks and came over to encourage him in between.

 

In the evening, they made time to visit with the children.  Nina had a cold that had Yuuri worried.  Victor volunteered in the kitchen that night and helped the cook make borscht to serve the kids.  Yuuri stayed close by and Nina climbed into his lap when she finished eating, straddling his legs, her head resting against Yuuri’s chest.  He could feel her warmth through his sweater.  Victor came into the room where he was seated, rocking her gently and speaking in his soft voice.  Several other children were sitting nearby and it took a moment for Victor to realize he was telling a story.  Not a fairy tale, but a story about when he started figure skating.  Victor settled on a nearby chair listening, and soon Zoya and Boris joined them taking seats on the sofa.

 

Yuuri smoothed her hair.  “When it’s something we are meant to do, something happens inside us, we feel at home.  That’s how I felt when I took my first dance lesson.  I was probably around Nina’s age back then.  It wasn’t until later that my teacher realized I needed something else.  She took me to the skating rink.  I was close to ten.  A much later start than most.  There were a couple of older kids there.  One was the son of the owner and the other, the novice instructor’s daughter.  Yuuko, the daughter, was very nice.  Takeshi, not so much.  But when the skates went on my feet, I felt something stir inside me.  

 

“I took to the ice easily.  Oh, I fell.  We all fall.  And then we learn how to fall without hurting ourselves.  But I loved it...like ice flowed through my veins.  The feel of the cold air as you glide across the ice is like no other.

 

“But...there was this kid.  And he liked to pick on me.  You know how it is.  You show any sign of weakness and they will find you.  I was short, pudgy, and cried a lot.”  He laughed.  “I still cry a lot but it’s different now.  He’d chase me around the rink, torment me, call me names...and then Yuuko would show up and they’d start yelling back and forth.  She was older than either of us.  Two years older than me, one older than Takeshi.  

 

“At first, the words really bothered me.  But then...something changed.  I was walking home one day, and I saw some teenagers and they...they were really pushing him around and trying to get something from him...like lunch money or something like that.  Now some would say he deserved it.  But for me, it was like everything fell into place.  

 

“My sister says that I’m the worst at defending myself...but I’ve always protected my friends.  Maybe that’s true.  I just know I became really upset.  I marched up in the middle of it all and demanded they backed off.  These teenagers who were more than twice my size.”  He glanced around the group.  “Do you know what happened?”  They shook their heads wide eyed.  He laughed.  “We got pummelled.  But then my sister found out.  She dealt with them, well, she and her friends.  And Takeshi and I...we became best friends.  He still picked on me, but there was a smile and we knew it was teasing.  And I teased back.  After that, we always looked out for each other.  We still do.  And I know if I ever needed him, he’d be there for me.”

 

As the evening wore on, the younger children were carted off to bed.  Victor fell in with the process.  Yuuri remained, holding onto Nina.  Andrei hovered nearby and Yuuri could see the concern in his eyes but soon he, too, was sent off to bed until all that remained were the adults and Nina.  She slept and Yuuri settled a fuzzy blanket around her.  He could feel her body sweating and hoped he was helping her fever to break.  But his energy was flagging, and at some point Victor looked up to see Yuuri had dozed off.

 

“I think I need to tuck in our little angel and then take my Yuuri home,” he murmured.  He reached for Nina and Yuuri’s eyes fluttered open as he started to lift her.  Victor saw the protest on his lips but responded, “Hush, now.  I can carry a small child.  You’ve had her all evening.  Let me put her to bed.”  He disappeared down the hall.

 

Yuuri was reluctant to leave and fussed with their belongings.  Zoya spoke, but her Russian was so thick Yuuri had trouble following.  Then Victor was back and firmly guiding Yuuri to the door, wishing the others good night and dragging promises from Boris to keep them informed about Nina’s cold.

 

Zoya leaned towards Boris as they walked out the door and grunted, “I guess you did good this time.  I hope they let them have them.”

 

“You backing the recommendation will help.  Thanks, Zoya.”

 

* * *

  


They received a call from the realtor the next day and looked at a couple of houses, but Victor didn’t like the neighborhood.  “I’m worried Andrei might find himself in trouble so far from us.”

 

“I agree.  If we could find something closer to where we work, I think that would be best.  Schools nearby and Andrei can continue hanging out at the youth shelter and gym where he has familiar people.”

 

Then it was time to go once again.  Cocoa was tired, and Yuuri hated packing her up once more, but Victor intervened.  “She is a working dog.  To take that away from her would be disrespectful.”  So Cocoa was crated up and made ready to fly.  At least there would be time before Worlds to rest up.

 

* * *

  


When they arrived, they found Chris and Phichit already checked in.  Victor and Yuuri were across the hall.  “Maybe we can get some sleep this time,” Chris teased with a wink.  “Our neighbors had loud sex almost every night in Slovakia.”

 

Yuuri’s face flamed up and he hid into Victor’s shoulder as Victor wrapped him up and chuckled.  “That sounds like jealousy.  Are you getting too old?”

 

“Look who’s calling me old!” Chris quipped back.

 

But Yuuri and Victor noticed that Chris was being exceptionally gentle with Phichit and the older one finally asked, “Is he okay?”

 

“Nightmares.  Ever since they tried to take him.  He’s kept quiet about it but when we are apart and he wakes up, he messages me or facetimes me.”  Chris fell quiet, his eyes resting on his boyfriend.  “It’s getting harder and harder to leave him.  At some point I’m going to have to make some changes.”

 

“How did it go with his parents?”

 

Chris chuckled.  “They seem to like me.  Only his father speaks English.  No French, of course.  And Italian is out, too.  So I’ll probably be picking up another language.  Phichit is patient with me, though.  And he enjoyed introducing me to his family.”

 

“Is he planning to train again across the distance?  I know Ciao Ciao worked with him by video most of last year.  Then he had the assistant.”

 

“We’ve talked about it in both of our cases, but neither of us have decided.  I think it’s a matter of who wants what the most.  I just know I want to be with him.”

 

Victor smiled, happy that his friend was finally moving forward in his relationship.  “It’s been a long time coming.”

 

* * *

  
  


Yuuri kept checking his phone in worry.  Victor came up behind him and peered over his shoulder.  “Any word?”

 

“Just that her cough is persistent.  They are taking her to the doctor today.”  Yuuri sighed.  “I think...somewhere along the way, I’ve become a parent.”

 

“It’s what you wanted,” Victor pointed out, his arms snaking around Yuuri’s waist.  Yuuri didn’t disagree.  “For now, let’s get you to practice.”

 

Practice was a disaster.  Yuuri shook it off and focused on familiarizing himself with the ice.  He knew his choreography.  He just needed to know his boundaries.  Finally, he pulled off the ice early.  “I’m done.”

 

“Are you sure?” Victor asked.  They had another hour, but Yuuri nodded and sighed.  Victor knew when he had a lot on his mind, it threw off his elements.  “Do you want me to find some place for you to unwind?”

 

“I just want to get this over with.”

 

Victor frowned but nodded.  “Why don’t we see if we can move up our flights?”

 

Yuuri’s eyes lit up.  “You’d do that for me?”

 

Victor laughed warmly.  “ _Lyubov moya_ , I’d move heaven and earth for you.”

 

They spent the afternoon looking at flight schedules and finally settled on one that would fly out  at midnight the day of the exhibition.  “I can sleep on the plane,” Yuuri assured him.  Victor just smiled indulgently knowing otherwise.  However, moving up the flight seemed to settle his husband a bit.

 

* * *

  


Yuuri’s worry translated in his skate programs.   _Eros_ was beautiful but the persona slipped and Yuuri’s confidence slipped right with it, causing him to touch down on jumps and his spins to not be quite as tight.  Victor held him afterwards whispering reassuring words but Yuuri seemed unreceptive.   _Yuuri on Ice_ became poignant, a sad edge filtering through.  He held his jumps this time, though, and his spins and step sequences were so very beautiful.  The commentators mentioned the sadness that seemed to show up in his performance and there was speculation among the press that the last year finally caught up to him now that the attackers were in hand.

 

Yuuri was just tired and didn’t even fuss about coming in fourth.  As it was, Otabek took first, followed by JJ, and then Phichit.

 

* * *

  
  


“What’s wrong, Yuuri?” Phichit asked as he sat crisscross in Yuuri’s bed.

 

“I’m just worried about someone,” Yuuri responded quietly.

 

Phichit’s eyes narrowed.  “You are lousy with secrets.  Spill.”

 

“It’s not a secret, really.  I just don’t want to jinx it.”  Yuuri sat down next to his friend and reclined back against the pillow.  “Victor and I are trying to adopt two kids.  Nina, who’s five, and Andrei who is fourteen.”

 

“Fourteen?  Wow, Yuuri...I mean you’ve been a good mentor at the rink but are you ready to handle a teenager?”

 

“I’d have Yura full time if I could,” he stated quietly as he took a drink from his water bottle.  Setting it on the nightstand, he shrugged.  “I wouldn’t take in just any teenager, but well...what happened to Sasha really affected me, especially after I learned about his story.  He ended up in the transition home that they want to shuffle Andrei off to.  It’s not a bad place, but...psychologically, it can make it harder for them to form relationships.  Healthy relationships.  Andrei has his sister and really wants to make sure she’s safe.  And I don’t want to see them separated.”

 

“I didn’t realize...is the Sasha thing still bothering you?”

 

Yuuri shrugged.  “All of it still bothers me from time to time, but I’m getting better at sorting through it all.  And the strategies are helping with my anxiety as well.”

 

Phichit studied his hands thoughtfully and Yuuri felt the sadness coming off of the normally happy Thai.  Finally, he looked up and Yuuri saw the haunting look in his eyes.  “I don’t know what to do.”

 

“What do you mean?”  Yuuri reached out and took his hand to transfer some of his warmth.

 

“I don’t know how to shake the fear.  I...keep waking up.  Chris doesn’t want to go home because of it.  I don’t know where I want to go.”

 

“You could...go with Chris,” Yuuri suggested.  “And once you settle, talk to a counselor.”

 

“But nothing really happened.  I mean, I got away.”

 

“It still caused some trauma in you.  They have so many therapies.  Personally, I recommend EMDR, but there are a number of options.  I’m sorry, Phichit...I should have realized you would be deeply affected by all of this.  I should have suggested something sooner.”

 

“Well, it felt like an asshole move to bring it up to you considering all you’ve been through...I just...I couldn’t figure it out myself.”

 

“Phich, you’ve always been there for me.  Of course I want to be there for you.  I want you to call me anytime you need me, okay?  I’d do the same to you.”

 

Phichit hugged his knees to his chest for a moment and Yuuri spied that smile blooming back into his cheeks then the Thai launched himself at Yuuri and rolled him over in a hug that left them both laughing.

 

* * *

  
  


Yuuri added the last item to his pack when his phone buzzed.  He picked it up and his eyes widened.  “Vitya!  Our Nina!  She’s in the hospital.”

 

Victor took the phone and read the text.

 

**Boris/ I just want you to know that Nina isn’t at the home at the moment.  They moved her into the hospital to watch her for complications due to pneumonia.**

 

Victor switched the keyboard and texted back and forth with Boris in rapid succession in Russian.  Finally, he handed the phone back and took Yuuri into his arms.

 

“Because of her HIV, they want to get ahead of the virus so that they can help her.  I’ve got the hospital’s name and we’ll go directly there after the plane lands.  I’ll arrange with Yakov for someone to pick up our gear and take it home.”

 

Yuuri leaned into Victor, his eyes wide as he felt the strands of parental fear grab hold of his heart.

 

Within a couple of hours, the foursome was at the airport preparing to head separate directions.  Yuuri was quiet, worried and withdrawn.

 

“It’ll be okay,” Phichit reassured him.  “They are ahead of it.  Not waiting for her to get really sick.”

 

“I feel so far away.  How can I be a parent if I’m not there when she needs me most?”

 

Chris put a reassuring hand on his shoulder.  “You’re doing it right now.  Being her parent.  Worrying about her.  Putting her at the forefront of your thoughts.  You knew she’d have struggles.  This is what you are going to be facing as her parent.  Times in the hospital, an increase in illness, infections, and a number of other things.  Perhaps her doctor will talk to you and tell you what you will face so that you’ll be better prepared.”

 

“Better prepared...thank you, Chris.  Victor said we’re going straight to the hospital.”

 

They waved their friends off as their flight was announced.  Cocoa stood up from where she rested at Yuuri’s feet and joined him at the head of the line.  With Yuuri so anxious, they arranged for her to ride in cabin with them.  Victor would join him with the first class passengers.  Soon they were loaded and Yuuri was leaning in Victor’s arms.  After the plane took off, he had Cocoa in his lap, his fingers tightening and loosening in the grip of her fur.  Victor smoothed out his worry lines only to have them return once more.  The flight would be long.  Yuuri napped but woke up guiltily at the indulgence.  Victor kept telling Yuuri to get some rest.

 

They arrived and were met by Ivan and Dmitry, who promised to gather their luggage and take it home.  “Keep us informed,” Ivan demanded.  Victor guided him to the shuttle for long term parking.  Finally, he negotiated the car out of the parking garage and into traffic.  They’d be at the hospital soon.

 

* * *

  
  


Yuuri’s fingers carded through Nina’s hair.  He and Victor had both been authorized as visitors by Boris.  They were only allowed in one at a time.  Victor sat in the waiting room with Andrei.

 

Yuuri studied the machines offering unfamiliar readings.  An IV fed fluids and medicine into her small body.  She held onto the stuffed poodle she brought home with her that first outing.  Yuuri looked up as a nurse entered and took her vitals.  She smiled indulgently.

 

“It doesn’t look like it, but she _is_ improving,” the nurse assured him.  Yuuri nodded weakly.

 

In the waiting room, Andrei sat next to Victor.  “This is going to scare him away,” the boy muttered under his breath.

 

“We aren’t going to abandon you,” Victor reassured him.

 

Andrei shrugged.  “It’s not me I’m worried about.  If they could only approve of you both as parents, I’d still be fine with it.  I’d know Nina was safe.  But...sometimes she needs so much.  It was too much for our own mother.  How can I expect it from Yuuri?  It was wrong for me to ask.”

 

“We do what we must for the ones we love.  Even push boundaries that should be hard and fast.  Trust my Yuuri to do what is right.  He has a strong heart.”

 

“Nina was a surprise.  Mama thought she couldn’t have any more.  My father...did things to her.  When we finally got away, well, it was just the two of us.  She tried to work in a store.  But in the end, she found herself following her mother’s shoes.  She knew how to make money with her body.  But when Nina came along, Mama became very unhappy.”  He looked up to catch Victor’s eyes.  “Not about Nina...she just knew she didn’t want Nina to be like her.  Then mama became sick and we then learned Nina was sick.  The medicine was so expensive.”

 

“Yuuri said your mother gave you both up because she couldn’t take care of you,” Victor said quietly.

 

“That’s true.  But it was more than that.  She hoped Nina could get better medicine.  As for me, she made me promise to stay close to her.”

 

“That’s a heavy burden for such a young man,” Victor murmured.

 

Andrei shrugged.  “That’s why I can’t go to the transition home.  I made a promise.  And...I want to make sure she is safe.  So...if it comes down to you getting only her, please promise me...you’ll take her.  I can make it.  But Nina...she needs you.”

 

Victor sighed, feeling the heaviness of Andrei’s request.  “We will fight to have both of you.  We may have to make it appear we aren’t married to do it, but that’s a price we’re willing to pay.  Boris is on our side.  He wants this as well.”  He held the boy’s eyes and could see the worried tears brimming them.  “However, if you are certain, we promise we will take her alone if we can’t get both of you.  But...if that happens, we want you to stay close, to stay in touch.  Okay?”

 

Andrei nodded.  “I-I’d like that.”  He then leaned into Victor and the man found his arms wrapping around the boy.  “I’m glad not all men are like my father.”

 

“Me, too.”

 

In the room, Yuuri watched blond lashes flutter open.  “Yuu-ri,” she rasped.  Yuuri reached over and held the water straw to her lips and she drank heavily.  The oxygen feeding in her nose made her feel dry.  She curled up to him and smiled.  “I can’t wait until you are my papa...and Victor.”  She smiled sweetly, tiredly.  Then her eyes brightened up as a thought hit.  “I can’t call you both papa.”

 

“In my language, you might call me _Chichi_ or _Otousan_.”

 

She smiled softly, turning the foreign words over her tongue.  “I like _Chichi_.”  She held onto him until she faded back into sleep.

  
  
  


It took two more days for Nina to respond to medicine well enough for her to be released.  After escorting her and Andrei back home, the two men contacted the realtor once more.  They had to find a home soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And I just learned that November is Adoption Awareness Month! I have such great timing!


	49. Chapter 49

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuri learns Yuuri and Victor are considering adoption and is pissed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! I hope you all had a lovely time with friends and family! Thanks so much to BluSkates and Magrathea for getting this ready for me. Now enjoy!

* * *

 

 

The blond took another jump with a scowl on his face pushing his body with the anger bundled up inside.  _  I was here first!  And they intend to just push me aside?  For a couple of street kids?  They don’t even skate!  What the fucking hell? _  Another jump, the landing a little wobbly.  Yuri pushed on.   _ All of that talk about family.  How they wanted me to be theirs.  I should have known it was all lies.  They probably said it to make themselves look good or feel better. _

 

The foul mood had begun earlier when Dmitry and Ivan were talking about picking up Victor and Yuuri’s things at the airport.  “Why are you doing that?” the teen demanded.

 

Dmitry shrugged and stated, “They are headed straight to the hospital.  We just want to help out.”

 

The teen narrowed his eyes suspiciously.  “Why are they going to the hospital?”

 

“It’s one of those kids they are thinking about adopting,” Ivan stated only to get punched by Dmitry and hushed.  “Anyway, we’ll be late to the rink.”  He scruffed Yuuri’s blond hair causing his frown to deepen at the uninvited contact.

 

“Yura!  Focus on what you are doing!” Yakov yelled pulling the blond back to the present.

 

_ Fuck’em all! _  The boy returned his attention to the ice, kicking into a step sequence.  _  I thought Katsudon and I were close.  He didn’t even tell me.  Just started spending more and more time at the orphanage.  He wouldn’t even know about them if it weren’t for me!  _   The three-turn into the spin combination was automatic, if emotionless causing the spin to lack the passion it was supposed to reveal.  _  I’ll show them both!  I’ll take that gold at Worlds and topple the Ice Prince. _

 

* * *

  
  


Yuuri frowned.  It was long past time for Yuri to show up at the studio.  He’d been giving more and more attitude with each passing day, antagonistic on the ice to the point that he’d been kicked off twice.  

 

Mila flounced in and grinned.  “What’s going on, Yuuri?”

 

“That’s my question.” Yuuri huffed, exasperated and smiled as the red-head quirked an eyebrow.  “Do you know why Yura is in such a bad mood?”

 

She smirked.  “Because he’s Yura?”

 

Yuuri leveled a longsuffering gaze towards her.

 

She flipped her hair as she stretched, welcoming the drama.  “Well, it might be because Dmitry let it slip that you and Victor are adopting.”

 

Yuuri frowned.  _  That can’t be good. _  Yuuri had Mila half way through stretching when the blond in question came in and flopped down.  He jerked through the quick change in gear and moved over to stretch at the bar not saying a word.

 

“You’re late,” Yuuri pointed out.

 

“What do you care?” the younger man threw back at him, green eyes glaring daggers, body rigid.  He continued to stretch ignoring Yuuri.  

 

The older man worked with Mila for the next hour and a half, ignoring the pouty teen until she skipped off.  Turning back to the youth, he cocked an eyebrow.

 

“Do you want to talk about it?”

 

“Not really,” he muttered, jerking on his hoodie.

 

“Do you want to fight about it?”

 

The teen narrowed his eyes on Yuuri.  “Here?”

 

“Where it’s proper.  We’ll go to Lev’s.”

 

“Don’t you have ‘plans’?”  Somewhere between the air quotes and the rolled eyes, Yuuri found himself fighting the urge to pop that jaw.  The gym would be a good place to deal with that aggression.

 

“Come on.  Put up or shut up,” Yuuri challenged, turning on his heel and walking off leaving the teen off balance.

 

Yuuri popped down to the rink where Victor was working on his program.  His husband skated before him and blew a kiss.  Yuuri shook his head and grabbed the car keys from the pile of keys and phones, sending a follow up text in explanation.  He passed the scowling blond on his way out the door.  “Coming, Yura?”

 

In the gym, Yuuri pulled on the pads as he focused on his mental space.   _ How did Boris do it? _  He knew how to block and dodge.  That wasn’t the issue.  It was keeping his emotions in check.  Clearing his thoughts, he stepped into the ring.  Yura was already there waiting.

 

“You’re starting to move slow like the old man!” he taunted.  

 

_ Slow, eh...how fast was that spin earlier?  _  Yuuri shook it off.  He even allowed himself to feel amused.  With a wave of his hand, he invited Yuri to come at him.

 

And Yuri did.  He put everything he had in those punches.  He didn’t pull a single one.  But the kitten didn’t realize that Yuuri was indeed fast.  Dodge...block...block...dodge.  They continued to dance around the ring.  That was what Yuuri liked about it.  He found it an unpredictable dance.  He led Yuri into the thrall of it and helped the boy to release his anger.  His stamina was his strength and soon Yuri was bent over breathing hard.

 

“Are we done?” Yuuri asked.

 

Sharp green eyes met his.  “Yeah, we’re done.”

 

Back in the car, Yura stared out the window.  Rain started to fall and Yuuri turned up the defrost.  Finally, the kid spoke.  “It’s not fair.”

 

“I know.”

 

“I was here first.”

 

“You still are here first,” Yuuri reassured him.

 

The teen looked small even though he’d been gaining inches over the last few months.  “It doesn’t feel like it.”

 

“Do you want to meet them?”

 

Yuri shrugged.  “I suppose.”  Then he huffed, “That doesn’t mean I’m going to like them.”

 

“I never assumed it did,” Yuuri responded hiding a ghost of a smile.  He pulled in front of the rink.  “Do you need to go back in?”

 

“Nah...I’m done.  Get the old man out here and let’s go home.”  Yuuri could feel Yuri start to warm to the idea as the blond had changed back to his everyday style of insults.

 

Victor soon came out and they shifted around.  The roads were getting slick and Yuuri preferred it when Victor drove during those conditions.  “Seatbelts!” he called out.  

 

Yura gave him a huffy, “I know.”

 

* * *

  
  


Victor and Yuuri walked through the third house that week.  The realtor seemed very pleased with this house.  “We rarely find  _ the  _ house with the first walk through.  Each one tells us a little more about what is important.”

 

Victor clicked off his wish list.  Master bedroom separate from the other rooms with a private bath.  Shower and large tub in master bath as well as dual sinks.  Walk in closets.  A bath with a shower to be shared between the kids.  Plenty of storage.  Fenced yard for the dogs.

 

Yuuri checked off his list.  A well appointed kitchen with a solid surface counter.  Room for a decent sized refrigerator.  Washer and dryer connections...in a SEPARATE room.  The living room, dining, and kitchen open on itself.  A breakfast bar.  Bath in the master bathroom.  No carpet.

 

The house was modest and unassuming in its appearance, but it provided everything on their list.  They could blend in as a quiet family down the street from a bus stop heading into town.  The school district was the same that delivered kids to the rink, and the neighborhood was familiar.

 

Yuuri and Victor agreed.  This was the place.  Victor made a cash offer contingent on inspection.  The realtor wrote it up, eager to make this sale.

 

“I can’t believe we found something so quickly,” Yuuri said as they climbed into the SUV.

 

“A good realtor is worth their weight in gold.  She handled the sale of the condo.  She knew I had that cash to turn back over into in offer.”

 

“That house isn’t nearly as expensive as the condo,” Yuuri pointed out.

 

Victor smiled and shrugged.  “I told her that was my ceiling but that I preferred something more modest and innocuous.  I wanted to blend in for a change.  I thought it might give the kids privacy.”

 

“Privacy is good.  Normal would be great.”  

 

Victor studied his husband and then reached out and took his hand.  “Are you okay?”

 

Yuuri sighed and nodded.  “I’m tired of the public eye.  I just...reporters have to dig into our personal business.  Is it right to bring kids into that?”

 

“Yuuri…”

 

“She’s going through so much.”

 

Victor sighed.  He knew Yuuri was second guessing his decisions and allowing anxious thoughts to crop up.  “She is already attached to us.  The other night?  When I carried her to bed before we left for Taipei?  She called me  _ papa _ .  We’re in too deep.  And...I know you don’t want to give her up.”

 

Yuuri shook his head insistently.  “I don’t...either of them.  Andrei...he is so smart, so full of potential that will be lost if he’s not given the right opportunities.  And then Nina...bright and happy in defiance of her challenges.  I do want them, Vitya.  It’s just...what if we aren’t the best option for  _ them _ ?”

 

Victor studied his husband with a soft smile.  “Andrei picked  _ us  _ out.  Remember that.  He invited us to be a part of their life.  I think that is important.  And Nina...she’s already attaching to us as well.  She runs to meet us when we show up to visit.  She crawls into one of our laps when we are telling stories or reading to the kids.  She’s already laid claim to us both.”

 

Yuuri swallowed and nodded.  “I’m sorry…” he whispered.

 

“Don’t be.  It’s not a decision to take lightly.”  Victor squeezed his hand reassuringly before moving into traffic to head back home.

  
  


* * *

  
  
  


Yuri frowned as he sat next to Yuuri in the assembly.  “I haven’t been in a regular school since I was about seven,” he complained.

 

Yuuri chuckled.  “Then you should feel at home.  I think this school only goes up to around eight.”

 

“Why did you bring me here?”

 

“You said you wanted to meet them,” Yuuri pointed out.  “We’ll go grab something to eat after and then take them back home.”

 

Victor arrived with Andrei.  “Yura, this is Andrei, Nina’s brother.”

 

Andrei flicked cautious eyes over Yuri.  “Hi,” he said shyly.  “I...thank you for coming.  I know you’re busy.”

 

Yuri regarded the boy.  He was small, like Yuri, and blond but paler.  His grey eyes were heavy with worries too big for someone of fourteen.  And Yuri understood that.  He glanced up at the stage and thinned his lips.  Part of him still felt petulant and selfish but another part he felt was softening.

 

The play was a cheerful school play version of  _ Peter and the Wolf _ with Nina playing the wolf.  Her ferocity amused Yuri as she growled and he found himself smiling.   _ Damn!  She’d have to be cute! _

 

After the play, she ran out and cried “Papa!  Chichi!  Did you see me?”

 

_ Ah, man!  Yeah, there is no way they are turning away from that!  _  Yuri watched the Japanese man scoop her up and her little legs wrap around him.  She looked so tiny.  

 

“I played a bad wolf!” she giggled.

 

“You were good, Ninochka,” Andrei praised, his hand sliding over his sister’s back.

 

“No!  I was scary!” she declared, then added a growl for good measure.

 

The laugh slipped out before Yuri could stop it.  Yuuri met his eyes and the younger man rolled his eyes but the smile settled.   _ Maybe they won’t be so bad.  I just don’t want to be forgotten. _

 

* * *

  
  


The  [diner](http://www.starlite.ru/en/menus/)  near the children’s home was small and cozy with a fun 50s theme to it.  They treated the kids to a Russian version of American junk food.  The boys went for burgers and fries; Yuri picking the bacon mushroom swiss cheeseburger and Andrei a mess of a burger covered with chili, cheese sauce, bacon, and jalapenos.  Yuri eyed that stack and asked him, “How do you eat that?”

 

Andrei grinned.  “I don’t know...about to find out.”  He then hunched over and took one drippy bite.

 

Yuuri shared toasted triple decker club sandwiches cut into quarter triangles with Nina.  Victor stole fries and bites of sandwich while sharing his salad with Yuuri.  They sometimes lost their focus on the kids, their eyes settling on one another as they offered a bite of this or that.  Nina giggled.  Yuri muttered that they are ridiculous.  Andrei said it was kind of sweet.

 

“We may have found our first fight,” Yuri faced off, narrowing his eyebrows but his lip twitched in amusement.

 

“I think it’s good they show they care about each other,” Andrei argued back.

 

“All the damn time?”

 

“Language!” echoed out from Yuuri, Victor, and Andrei which elicited giggles by Nina and pink cheeks from Yuri.

 

Nina reached over and dipped a fry in ketchup only to offer it to Yuri.  The blond accepted it begrudgingly and glared at Yuuri over her head because he knew the Japanese man knew he was melting inside.   _ Damn that kid! _

 

* * *

  
  


Yuri was quiet on the drive home, the kids were back at the home.  He felt a mixture of sadness and loneliness he’d never noticed before.   _ Damn that kid!  _  He pouted a little in the cover of darkness.  As they arrived home, the blond looked sadly towards the main house.

 

“Do you want to stay the night?” Victor offered.

 

Yuri shrugged.  Yeah, he wanted to but he didn’t want it to be a pity offer.

 

Yuuri, though, sensed his turmoil.  “It’s too late.  Come inside and I’ll make bedtime tea.  We can play some  _ Overwatch  _ to unwind.”

 

“Okay...since gaming is involved,” Yuri agreed.

 

As they sat in front of the TV with Victor fussing around the living room after taking the dogs out, Yuri finally said, “She’s kind of cute.”

 

“I know.  Hard to turn her down.”

 

Yuri nodded.  “Remember, though.  I was here first.”

 

Yuuri grinned.  “Of course.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know. They should have sat him down and talked to them. Hind sight and all that...


	50. Chapter 50

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Preparing for their future, Victor and Yuuri are facing new decisions and bitter consequences. A new person arrives in their world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much, BluSkates and Magrathea, for the edits!
> 
> And thank you to all who are still reading this monster of a fic! ;)

* * *

 

 

The rink was quiet as people fell away into the evening.  Victor, free from the demands pulling on him, gave into his program in the shadows.  He knew Yakov was near but quiet.  Victor worked through his first program making small adjustments.  He was still dropping that shoulder and it frustrated him.  A tiny worry seeded into his thoughts.  Even with physical therapy.  Even with the work Yuuri put towards it.  At the end of the day, the shoulder kept dropping and he knew it affected everything.  His spins were thrown off.  His jumps were under-rotated.  His landings were off balance.  It was as if his center of gravity was slightly off.

 

He fell, wincing as that shoulder hit against the ice and he rolled out of it.  As he regained his feet, he found himself meeting Yakov’s eyes.  “Don’t tell Yuuri,” he said quietly.  The older man thinned his lips.  “I can get past this.”

 

“I know you are trying.”

 

“He’ll blame himself,” Victor said quietly as he skated up to his coach and accepted the water bottle.

 

“And what if you don’t...get past this.”

 

Victor frowned.  “I haven’t said anything to anyone yet.”

 

“Have you had an MRI?  Maybe surgery,” the coach suggested.

 

“Perhaps...but it will continue to be a weakness.  I’m not as young as I was.  I can’t bounce back like when I was a kid.”

 

His coach held his eyes.  “He’s going to know.”

 

Victor dropped his eyes.  He knew he would.  He probably already noticed.  Too many worried glances were cast his way from those brown eyes.  “If I have surgery...I don’t know if I can come back...and for...just the Olympics?”

 

“It could improve your quality of life regardless.  I want you to talk to a specialist.”

 

“Are you pulling me from Worlds?”

 

“That’s your decision...one I think you should discuss with your husband, but yours just the same.”

 

Victor nodded.  He hated this...everything about it.  But it wasn’t like he could hide a surgery from Yuuri.

 

He stepped off the ice and snapped on the guards, heading straight to the locker room.  He knew his emotions were about to peak from the strain and didn’t want to have that break in front of Yakov...or anyone.  In the privacy of the shower, he allowed himself to give into the rising tide of the emotion.  He bowed over and and sobbed.  As much as they said that the attackers didn’t win...he still felt as if something was stolen from him.  And...it hurt.

 

Leaving the locker room, he checked the mirror on the way out.  It would be too much to hope Yuuri wouldn’t see the redness in his eyes.  Yuuri noticed everything...especially these days.  Those discerning brown eyes watched him closely for signs that he wasn’t taking care of himself.  He climbed the stairs and walked down the hall that would lead to the studio.  He waited outside, hesitant to enter, but the [ music ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nULXNDYOykI)drew him in.  Familiar but distant, this had been used in Yuuri’s senior recital.

 

He hovered near the door watching the scene unfold before him.  It was new but unmistakable.  Yuuri was choreographing something unique and beautiful.  The song wound around him and he felt the healing balm of the words.  God, how is it that Yuuri knew what he needed?

 

But there was something particular about this song...this choreography.  It was then that he recognized what Yuuri was doing.  He was building off the injury.  Instead of fighting it, he worked it in as part of the choreography.  It would be different.  Difficult and challenging in its own right.  But...the injury was part of the story.

 

Yuuri knew.

 

As his husband came to a rest and met his eyes, he smiled.  “I wasn’t going to show you, yet.”

 

“It’s...beautiful.” Victor barely heard his own voice in the awed whisper.

 

“I was waiting...for you to come to me.  For you to be ready to talk about it.”

 

“It’s...not getting better,” he sighed heavily feeling tears brimming his eyes once more.  “What if I need surgery?”

 

“Then you will do what is needed,” Yuuri stated.

 

Victor sighed...he hated having to lean on anyone but Yuuri didn’t back down.  “I should have known you’d figured it out.”

 

“You should see a specialist and see what they have to say,” Yuuri pressed.

 

“I don’t want to be pulled from Worlds,” Victor...pouted.  He could admit it.  It was definitely a pout.

 

“What if being pulled from Worlds meant you were able to skate for two more years?” Yuuri countered.

 

 _Damn his logic!_  “I do want the Olympics!” he whined.

 

“So...the specialist?”

 

Victor nodded.  “Will you go with me?”  He heard the whine this time.   _Damn, I’m pathetic!_

 

Yuuri chuckled, slipping his arms around his husband’s waist.  “Of course, you idiot!”

  


* * *

  
  


“We have to go to the main house tonight,” Victor informed Yuuri as he came out of his shower.

 

Yuuri rubbed the towel in his hair and narrowed his eyes.  “What’s going on?”

 

“Summons from Madame Lilia.  Have you heard anything?  She’s called a family dinner.”

 

Yuuri shook his head.  “No one’s said a word to me.  Do you think anyone knows?”  As they fielded a few others, they were all just as in the dark as the couple.  Arriving home, they took the dogs out and then made sure they cleaned up for dinner.  A family dinner meant dressing.  Yuuri and Victor changed to their suits.  They both felt stress.  Lilia’s health condition had been kept quiet, but Victor and Yuuri worried it was getting worse.

 

“She’s been at the studio less and less,” Yuuri murmured as they left the house.  Victor nodded, well aware.

 

Their arrival at the manor house was greeted with warm voices and laughter.  As they entered, Victor’s eyes lit. up.  “Miss Lidiya!”

 

“Come here, my boy, give me a hug,” the woman demanded.  It was clear she was related to Lilia though round where Lilia was thin.  

 

Yuuri hung back at the sight of this new person, a warm and softer version of Madame Lilia.  It didn’t take much thought to know there was a relationship.  It was Lilia that called him on in.

 

“Come, Yuuri, meet my sister,” she beckoned.

 

Yuuri stepped forward even as Victor turned and held out his hand.  “Lidiya, this is my Yuuri.”

 

She stretched out her hand and Yuuri took it shyly, his eyes dropping.  She laughed, her warmth wrapping around Yuuri in the manner of grandmothers.  “Oh, Vitya, he’s adorable!  However did you find him?”

 

“He captivated me with his skating and then drunkenly demanded I dance with him,” Victor stated proudly watching Yuuri’s face go scarlet.

 

“Vitya!” Yuuri cried out, his voice caught between admonishment and alarm.

 

Lidiya laughed easily.  Whereas Lilia maintained a reserved demeanor, Lidiya was open and outgoing.  She chatted with Victor, and Yuuri learned that she returned home after completing her contract as a nanny for a Russian diplomat in France.  “It was an interesting position.  I haven’t worked with older children in some time.  Probably not since I had all of you running around my ankles.”  She cast her eyes around the older members of the skate family.

 

Victor turned and explained to Yuuri, “When we all lived here as teenagers, we drove Lilia mad until Lidiya came home and took over.  She stayed until all of us moved out.”

 

“Da, they were quite rambunctious.  There was that auburn haired girl.  Katya.  And a couple of others.”

 

Mila perked up.  “Katya is my sister.  She’s recently retired and is attending university.”

 

“Lovely!  One should not limit oneself.  Skating can be an unpredictable sport.  One never knows when an injury will clip your wings.”  She glanced over at Yakov who only grunted in agreement.  Victor exchanged uncertain glances with Yuuri.  He had an appointment the next day and was terrified of the results.

 

The meal was formal, and Yuuri would glance at Victor every so often for cues.  He caught the blond Yuri doing the same.  Finally, the younger skaters left to work on homework and the older ones settled into the parlor for coffee and tea.  Yuuri stayed glued to Victor’s side.  Lidiya cycled her attention through each of the boys she had a hand in raising.  She cried out in happiness when she learned Ivan and Dmitry were together.  “Finally!  I thought the two of you would never figure that out!”

 

“What do you mean ‘finally’?” Ivan argued.

 

“I knew the two of you were meant to be together for years,” she responded with a wave.  She then turned her attention to Georgi and learned of his latest heartbreak.

 

As they talked, Yuuri moved closer to Lilia, who was quiet.  She looked up at him and patted the place next to her on the settee.

 

“Yes, Yuuri, she’s here for me,” she murmured.

 

“Is it...worse?” he asked quietly.

 

She didn’t exactly answer the question.  “The next treatment they are trying will leave me weaker.  I may need some care.”

 

“You need to tell the others,” Yuuri whispered.

 

“I will...in my own time.”  And with that, the subject was dismissed and she turned her attention to Lidiya who now spoke with Victor.

 

“You are adopting?” she asked, her eyes moving from Victor to Yuuri and back.  “Will they let you?”

 

“There...are some difficulties.  The fact that I’m a celebrity with money will help.”

 

She nodded.  “ _Da_.  Money greases the wheels and turns a blind eye,” she agreed.  “You must bring them to me!  I must meet these children!”

 

“We all want to meet them,” echoed the others.

 

Yuuri and Victor exchanged glances.  “We are waiting for an approval for an overnight visit,” Victor said quietly.

 

“Good.  When they come to stay, we’ll welcome them to the family!”

 

It was settled as easy as that.  Yuuri stumbled after Victor as they returned to their home.  “She’s…”

 

“I know...but she was there for me when I was going through some hard times.”

 

“She’s very...accepting,” Yuuri whispered, as if they’d be overheard as they drew close to the house.

 

Victor chuckled softly.  “I suppose she is...of course, her previous girlfriends would not be happy otherwise.”

 

“Oh.  I didn’t think…”

 

Victor continued to tell her story as he unlocked the door.  “She’s...discrete.  There are still certain ideas about our community and children.  And she loves working with children.  When she retired from a very public life as a concert pianist, her parents were very angry.  Lilia stood by her and Lidiya chose her own path.  She liked independence and refused to rely on her parents’ money with the attached strings.  They wanted her...to marry a nice Russian boy.”

 

Yuuri removed his scarf and hung up his coat as he listened.  As Victor finished, his eyes widened with the gravity of the words.  “I see.”

 

“Indeed.  They thought...it was a phase.  Lilia was her only connection to their family for years.”  Victor stared off in the distance, something edging his thoughts, his lips turning downward.

 

“That’s really sad,” Yuuri whispered.

 

Victor thinned his lips sadly.  “Not all parents accept their children as openly as yours, Yuuri.  Hiroko and Toshiya are a blessing.”

 

Yuuri smiled bittersweetly.  “I know.  They’ve never made me feel like there was something wrong.  If someone said something, they’d laugh and said I was just being Yuuri.  And that was okay.  I knew I was safe with them.  I knew they loved me.”

 

“Agape,” Victor whispered.

 

Yuuri nodded wrapping his arm around Victor’s.  “I want to be that kind of parent to our kids.”

 

“You are that kind of parent already...the way you didn’t hesitate when Andrei reached out to you for help, the way you watched over our Nina when she was sick and in the hospital, the way you handled Yuri’s anger and frustration with the situation.”

 

“You and I both have been dealing with that one,” Yuuri cut in.  “And I still worry if it’s enough.  He was quiet this evening.”

 

“He’s probably picked up on there being something unspoken and he’s trying to figure it out.”

 

“I told Lilia she needed to tell everyone.”

 

“We were hoping she wouldn’t need this third stage of treatment.  If she loses her hair…”

 

Yuuri hugged him close.  “You will help her find a wig...as lovely as the one you have.”

 

Victor smiled at the thought.  “I would be honored to help restore her beauty.”

  


* * *

  


“Hello, Mr. Nikiforov.  I’m Dr. Romanov and I will be handling your case.  My specialization is orthopedic surgery, and I work with a number of athletes.  Although I am a surgeon, if we can avoid surgery, we will do so.  Now, let’s talk about how this injury took place.”

 

Victor talked quietly about the events of the kidnapping and the abuse on his body.  He then explained what treatment he has already endured.  The doctor nodded thoughtfully making notes.  Finally, he put his pen and pad down and held the silver haired man’s eyes.  Victor squeezed Yuuri’s hand as he listened to the specialist.

 

“When you were cleared for skating, was there an MRI performed?”

 

“Yes.  I also had regular visits with PT and still continue with those visits and the exercises in between.”

 

Dr. Romanov, frowned.  “I want to look at this thoroughly before we discuss treatment.  Your next competition is in April.  Let’s see if we can make it possible for you to compete.”

 

“I’d rather lay out during the Grand Prix series if I must,” Victor confirmed.  “However, I don’t want to create a permanent injury.”

 

“Any given skate could lead to permanent injury.  Let’s see if we can stabilize that shoulder and figure out the problem.  Okay?”

 

Victor nodded, a little more relaxed that this doctor wasn’t trying to pull him off the ice immediately.

 

“Okay.  I’m going to order a series of tests so that I can get a better idea of what we are dealing with.  Xrays, MRI, and ultrasound to start.  If that doesn’t reveal anything, we’ll do some nerve tests.  Are you experiencing spasms?”

 

“Some.  Usually after a long day.  I ice it down, though, and Yuuri helps me to properly stretch it out.”

 

The specialist leveled his gaze on the Japanese man.  “Are you an athlete as well?”

 

“Yes, doctor...figure skating and dance.  I’m also a dance instructor.”

 

“So you’ve had at least some sports injury prevention experience.”

 

“And a few classes on the topic.”

 

“Good.  I’m going to give very specific instructions on his care and see if we can keep him skating.  If I show you what to do, can you follow through?”

 

“Of course,” Yuuri assured him.

 

“Excellent,” he responded before turning back to Victor.  “Now, let’s get these tests ordered.  After I’ve processed the information, I’ll have you come back.  We have a quick turn around so it should be within the week.”

  
  


* * *

  


 

They could not be approved for an overnight until they had passed a home study, which meant not until after they moved.  However, they were approved for day visits.  Yuuri guided the kids inside the house, his hand holding Nina’s tightly.  Or was she holding his tight?  Andrei looked around the kitchen taking it in.  “I don’t think I expected this,” he said finally.

 

Yuuri laughed.  “Well, Victor’s previous home was a high rise condo but we moved here for...privacy.”

 

Andrei gave Yuuri a furtive glance but did not comment on the obvious lie of omission.  He glanced over towards his sister who held onto her stuffed poodle with her free hand.  “So what do we do now?”

 

“Well, first we would like to introduce you to the members of this family, both here and at the big house.  Would you like to hang up your coats?”  He took them from their hands as they peeled them off and as he was hanging them, he heard a bark.  And Nina’s squeal.  Yuuri turned to see her jumping up and down excitedly with her Russian flowing so rapidly Yuuri had trouble following.  But he did pick out the word for puppy.

 

Victor knelt down between the two dogs, his hand on Makkachin.  Cocoa sat still waiting for a command.  Yuuri used a low voice and commanded, “Heel.”  The dog walked purposefully across the room and took her position next to Yuuri.  He looked up to see blue saucer eyes watching him.  “Do you want to meet her?”

 

She nodded rapidly.  Yuuri held out his hand and invited her to his side.  She moved hesitantly until she reached Yuuri, then stood there uncertainly waiting for him to tell her what to do.  Yuuri turned to the dog and made introductions.  “Cocoa, this is Nina.  She is very important to us and you.”  Turning to Nina, he guided her hand gently.  “Nina, this is Cocoa.  She looks out for me especially when I have anxiety.  She is trained to do this.  Sometimes I have bad dreams and she helps me to do better.”  He placed her hand on Cocoa’s fur and guided it to stroke her fur.  “Easy now.  Just like you’d like to be touched.”

 

“I’ve never had a puppy,” she whispered.

 

“Our home will always have dogs.  Would you like to go meet Makkachin?”  Yuuri nodded towards Victor.  She turned to look at her brother as if asking for permission, which he gave with an imperceptible nod.  She then turned and walked towards Victor who held his hand out to grasp hers as she drew closer.

 

“Makkachin is my baby,” he explained.  “She came to me when I was really lonely and helped me not to feel so alone.  Although she isn’t as well trained as Cocoa, she’s a good dog.  However, she’s older and needs us to be especially gentle with her.”  Nina gently patted Makkachin with the softest of touches.

 

Makka licked her face, startling her.  Then she gave a squeal of delight even as Victor chastised the dog for her manners.  She just thumped her tail pleased by the happiness she stirred in this tiny human.

 

All of this was watched quietly by Andrei who seemed almost afraid of stepping in, of being a part.  Yuuri spoke softly to him.  “Would you like to pet her?”

 

Andrei nodded, still frozen.  Yuuri clicked his tongue and Cocoa fell into step as he approached the boy.  The boy held out his hand, shaky at first then dropped to his knees and embraced the dog, tears falling from his eyes.  Yuuri met Victor’s eyes uncertain what just happened and they just waited.  Nina broke away, though, and ran to hug her brother from behind.  Finally, he looked up wiping away his tears.  “I’m okay,” he assured her.  Looking up at Yuuri, he added, “It’s stupid, really.  I just...I had a dog but...my father…”  He trailed off and sighed.  “He was not a nice man.  I don’t want to say in front of Nina.”

 

“I understand.  If you want to talk later, though, I’ll listen,” Yuuri offered quietly.

 

“I miss him...that dog,” Andrei offered a brief but sad smile.

 

Later, as Victor took Nina to clean up before dinner, Andrei told Yuuri that his father killed the dog because Andrei did something that displeased him.  He didn’t go into detail, just a simple statement then collapsed into Yuuri’s arms.  Yuuri held onto him, the small body shaking with long unshed grief.  He knew Andrei had been abused, but he was courageous and refused to let that define him.  He was fiercely protective over his family and defended his mother with ease.  Finally, Andrei pulled back and met Yuuri’s eyes.  “I hope...you’ll still want us even after you know how broken we are,” he whispered.

 

“We are all broken in this family,” Yuuri said softly.  “We’ll learn together to pick up the pieces.  You did not let this beat you.  You are still fighting...and that’s courageous.”

 

The boy let that praise settle around him and found a small smile.  Wiping another tear, he asked, “Can I clean up somewhere?”  Yuuri nodded, showing him the half bath below.  The boy disappeared, leaving Yuuri to his thoughts.

 

 _I can’t let it just be Nina.  He needs a place, too.  He wants it so much._  Boris had talked to him about the age gap.  It was another reason Yuuri had been taken out of the equation.  Victor was fourteen years older, though, and he thought he could make it happen. _The kids are aware of our relationship, of us being married.  How are we going to keep this all under wraps for the officials?_  He continued to worry about the _hows_ and _what ifs_ as the others joined him and they prepared to go up to the main house.

 

At the main house, the kids were enveloped in love and Nina soon dubbed them as Dyadya Georgi, Dyadya Dmitry, Dyadya Ivan, Tetya Mila and Dyadya Yuri, which he grunted at, but Yuuri caught that secret smile.  Yuri already had a soft spot for her and it was growing larger by the moment.  For Yakov and Lilia, it was _Deda_ and _Baba_.  She then stepped before Lidiya uncertainly.

 

“I am Lilia’s sister.  What will you call me?” she invited, her features firm but kind.

 

The child chewed her lip as she twisted her feet.  “I could say Baba Lilia and Baba Lidiya,” she suggested.

 

The other woman smiled warmly.  “I think...I would like that.”  She then turned to Andrei.  “And you?”

 

He laughed nervously.  “I think if it’s okay, I’ll call you Madame Lidiya.”

 

“That is fine.  Tell me about yourself.”

 

“There’s...not much to say.  I go to school, take care of my sister, hang out at the youth shelter.  Yuuri had been teaching me to dance.”

 

“What do you learn in school?”

 

“The normal stuff.” The boy was ready to equivocate his way out of the conversation, when something about this woman made him open up.  “Oh, and I’ve been learning piano.”

 

Lidiya’s eyes sharpened.  “And do you like this?”

 

“Yes...but it’s hard.  I don’t have a lot of opportunity to practice.”

 

She nodded sharply.  Turning to Victor, she waved him over.  “Vitya, when you get this boy, you should bring him to me.  I will teach him how to play piano.”

 

Victor’s eyes widened and nodded.  “Of course, Miss Lidiya.  Andrei, you should feel honored.  Lidiya once played at great concert halls.”

 

She waved him off even as the boy’s eyes widened.  “Pshaw...that was a century ago.”

 

Victor laughed.  “If it was so long, then you look remarkably young for your age.”

 

“Look at you...always charming the ladies.  No wonder they thought you were a playboy.”

 

“But you always knew otherwise.”

 

“Of course...you are a good, sweet boy.”

 

As they drove the kids back to the home, Nina cuddled into Yuuri in the back seat as Andrei rode up front and talked to Victor about Lidiya’s offer.  They regretfully let them go back to the home and stumble off to bed.

 

“Have you heard any more from the lawyers?”

 

“We’ve done all that we can for now.  Next, we just have to close on the house and move in to move forward.  One step at a time.”

 

“I...hate bringing them back there.  I want to tuck them in under our roof.”

 

“Soon, _lyubov moya_.  Soon.”

  


* * *

  


 

The doctor sat before Victor his expression thoughtful.  “What you have is a rotator cuff tear.”

 

Victor took in the words with a deep breath of air and let it out slowly.  “What do we do about it?”

 

“It is severe enough that you need to consider surgery.  It’s a long recovery but with regular therapy, we can have you back in form in four to six months.”

 

“I’ve stretched.  I’m diligent with my PT.  My Yuuri makes sure I stretch even more.”  His protests fell off his lips one after another.  Finally he quieted, drawing slow breaths to gain control and realizing Yuuri was rubbing slow circles into his back as he processed the results.  “I’m going to have to drop out of Worlds, aren’t I?”

 

“If you compete, you will continue to have difficulty.  The injury is refusing to heal and it will continue to limit your movement and worsen.  We can wait on this until after you compete, but there is a chance it will get worse.  The stiffness you are feeling, the pain...these aren’t going to go away.”

 

“I think...I need to talk with my coach and Yuuri before I decide.”

 

“If you want to move on this sooner, I need to know by the end of the week to put you on the surgery rotation.”

 

Victor nodded numbly.  Yuuri guided him to their vehicle and took the keys from a shaken Victor before settling him into the passenger seat.  They drove straight to the rink.

 

Yakov took one look at Victor and excused himself.  In the old man’s office, he pulled out a bottle of vodka and poured a shot for Victor and himself.  He offered one to Yuuri but the Japanese man politely refused.  “So...surgery,” the coach surmised.

 

Victor threw back the shot and nodded wordlessly.

 

“Well, when is it?”

 

“That depends on whether or not I pull from Worlds,” Victor said quietly.

 

The old coach pulled out a paper with a sharpie.  In concise, no-nonsense script, he began writing down scores in order from highest to lowest of the top ten from EC and 4CC.  He drew a circle around Victor’s score...still at the top but not by much.  He then selected certain scores and connected them to their associated Grand Prix Final scores.  Yuuri had a real potential for beating him but Victor knew he wouldn’t want to win at the expense of his injury.

 

Victor frowned and studied the data.  Touching his score, he asked, “How do I compare in practice?”

 

“You barely show improvement, Vitya,” the coach answered refilling the shots.  “The shoulder is a hindrance.”

 

Victor sighed unhappily.  “If I withdraw now and go through the surgery, there’s a good chance I can compete in the next season.  If I delay, I could aggravate the injury and delay my recovery.”

 

The coach nodded.  Yuuri remained quiet.  Victor could see his mind working.  Victor decided to take a chance.  “If I learned the new choreography Yuuri’s prepared, it has less of a chance aggravating the injury.”

 

Yakov’s eyebrows shot up.  “You have less than two months!”

 

“I’d like to try.  Give me this week to work through it.”

 

“You are scrapping both programs?” Yakov demanded, his eyes bulging.

 

Victor smiled benignly and shrugged.  “Reworking the short.  New free.  Either that or have surgery.”

 

Finally Yuuri spoke, his voice soft and hesitant.  “It’s not built on technical points but relies heavily on PCS.  Do you think we can make it competitive?”

 

“I think we should try,” Victor said quietly.  Then he winked and smiled.  “It will certainly surprise the audience!”

  


_______

NOTES:

 

So I did do research to figure out which shoulder injury fit Victor’s situation.  For those who like to get into those things, I’ve included these links:

 

[ How are specific shoulder conditions diagnosed? ](https://www.arthritisresearchuk.org/arthritis-information/conditions/shoulder-pain/diagnosis.aspx)

 

[ Shoulder Pain ](http://www.sportsinjuryclinic.net/sport-injuries/shoulder-pain)

 

[ Olympic Figure Skating:  The Most Common Injuries Behind Artistic Athleticism ](http://www.orthohealing.com/blog/olympic-figure-skating-common-injuries-behind-artistic-athleticism/)

 

[ Common Shoulder Injuries ](https://orthoinfo.aaos.org/en/diseases--conditions/common-shoulder-injuries)

 

[ Kobe Bryant’s Shoulder Surgery Decision Explained by a Medical Expert ](http://ftw.usatoday.com/2015/01/nba-kobe-bryant-surgery-options-shoulder-rotator-cuff-injury-tear-los-angeles-lakers)

 

And because someone asked what is Universal Precautions, here’s a [ link ](https://www.osha.gov/SLTC/etools/hospital/hazards/univprec/univ.html).

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...there are some links up above.


	51. Chapter 51

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Worlds!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, BluSkates and Magrathea, for the edits!

* * *

 

Yuuri and Victor were given the small rink in which they would work through Victor’s choreography to emphasize his strengths and downplay the injury.  “You know, you’d be good working with someone in the Paralympics,” Victor pointed out.  “I don’t feel the strain on my shoulder nearly as much as I have been.  How did you work that out?”

 

“Well...I...umm...I wrapped my arm and made it less flexible.”  Yuuri studied Victor’s face searching for signs of concern, but silver haired man merely smiled.

 

“You put yourself in my shoes.”

 

“I wanted to understand how the injury affected your movements.  And then figure out how to work around it.”

 

Victor nodded, “I called to set up the appointment for the surgery right after the Worlds.”

 

“Good.  The sooner the better.”  Yuuri ran a hand down Victor’s stiffer arm.  He saw the little frown that was trying to hide itself settle on his husband’s lips.

 

“I’m out for the Grand Prix series, though.”

 

Yuuri paused, he didn’t want to devalue Victor’s frustration, but he did want to emphasize the positive.  “You can come out for Nationals.”

 

“Can I...help choreograph your programs?”

 

Yuuri smiled warmly.  “I’d love your hand in their final construction.”

 

“What you’ve created...is beautiful.  I don’t know how it will hold up.  I’ve never pushed PCS scores.”

 

“Sometimes what we need to accomplish something beautiful.  And that, in itself, is its own victory.”

 

“If I stepped down, someone else could skate,” Victor pointed out.

 

Yuuri leveled a gaze on his husband.  As selfless as the gesture seemed, the podium position Victor would bring home for Russia meant that more people could compete in larger venues in the future.  “Would they win?”

 

Victor slowly shook his head in admission.  “No, they wouldn’t.  I don’t know if they would score as high as I will with this one.  It feels...selfish.”

 

“You are already stepping out of the next series.  If you want this, take it.”

 

“I want to perform the program you created for me,” he breathed out.

 

Yuuri smiled, his expression soft.  “I want that as well.”

 

* * *

  


Between long hours at the rink, they visited the kids, spent time with Yuri, talked to the attorneys, met with doctors, and life moved forward...until the sentencing.  Two weeks before Worlds.  “Do you want to go?” Victor asked.

 

Yuuri squirmed.  “I want...to know they are put away.  But I don’t...want to see them.”

 

“Do you want Nikolai to send some sort of confirmation?”

 

Yuuri nodded.  “Yes.  I think...yeah, that’s what I want.”  Yuuri looked relieved.  Victor pulled him into his embrace.

 

The trial went fast; the international community wanting to see this handled swiftly.  Within days, Victor received the call and held onto Yuuri as he put it on speaker.  Nikolai’s voice filled the space even as Yuuri pressed his cheek into Victor’s shoulder.

 

“They will never again breath air as free men.  Should they be released from the Russian prison where they will begin their sentence, there are a string of extraditions in place to send him to the next.  While Russia has no intention of releasing them, however, Japan would be their next stop.”

 

Yuuri frowned.  “Japan will not want to let them go, either.  How long is their sentence?”

 

“Fifteen years for each count of rape.  Ten for each count of kidnapping.  Five for the attempted kidnapping of Chulanont.  Overall, it adds up to over a hundred and fifty years.  They won’t see freedom.”

 

“Did they...show any remorse?” Yuuri asked tentatively.

 

Nikolai was quiet.  Finally, he said, “I don’t think they could see past their own anger with life.  Their father...was cruel.  I think even more so after his wife left.  It’s not an excuse...but maybe an explanation.  Who knows how far back that cruelty goes...but hopefully this can break that cycle.”

 

“I wish...I knew what happened to the third brother.”

 

“I’m sure he is out there.  The news...it was very public.  He had to have seen it.  But I wouldn’t blame him for remaining reclusive...especially after this.”

 

“I just...I would hate for him to think we blame him.  I’m glad...he got out.”  Yuuri frowned.  He felt Victor’s arms tighten around him.

 

* * *

  
  


Victor stood nervously awaiting his turn.  All of his friends already skated but now he understood Yuuri’s disregard for skating last.

 

Yuri currently sat in first after the short, with the Japanese Yuuri in a close second.  His eros was beautiful, but something deeper translated into those movements, and Victor couldn’t wait to see how it worked into his free skate.  Otabek currently held onto third and the Finnish skater coming off the ice would not push anyone out of position.

 

Victor took a deep breath and released it.  When was the last time he skated with so little confidence?  A hand slid up his back and he turned to see Yuuri, a tender expression in those soft brown eyes.

 

“Don’t worry about the numbers, Vitya,” he murmured.  “Just be beautiful and tell the story.”

 

The reinterpretation of [ _Sparrow_ ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C9haTFoGcvk) took the audience by surprise.  He showed his pain laid bare.  Beginning with simple footwork he built from a backwards inside loop, allowing the right shoulder to drop, pulling him into the turn a little too violently, but used his free leg to stop rotation and move into an illusion.  The audience followed as the gentle piano mirrored the elegant step sequence, growing in its beauty.  Victor, who had made a name for large jumps and larger than life performances, now stunned his audience with subtle grace of complex motions made to look simple.  As the music grew in passion and the bass notes seemed to overtake the treble Victor’s arms reached out to extend his spiral positions.  The right lagging, injured, but reaching still.  The audience saw the beauty and pain in the injured athlete.  In the four minutes and thirty seconds he was given, Victor told of finding his love broken and rebuilding him so that he could once more fly.  Layered within the story, though, was his own struggle and inner fight.  In the final movement, a deathdrop into a sit spin, the audience saw his fall, his struggle, and, as he rose into back scratch spin, breaking free to fly once more even if it was with a broken wing.

 

The audience had a delayed response as Victor took his final position stretching out his good arm and fanning his fingers like wings.  His second arm did not reach as far, the fanned fingers swept downward reinforcing the image of a broken wing.  As he dropped his arms and swept into a deep bows, the audience woke up as if the spell had been broken.  It wasn’t a thunderous applause.  It was the stunned silence of people who knew they had witnessed something truly beautiful, truly heartbreaking.  They had seen _truth_ performed on the ice.  There was the sound of breathing, hidden sobs as some wept at the beauty, others at the pain.  Slowly it turned to discussion and uncomfortable uncertainty that begged the question “Should we applaud?  It was so sad.”  And one person broke the silence, clapping, creating and echo in the silent arena.  That sound was picked up and joined by another, then another until a steady build of support surrounded him.

 

He joined Yuuri and Yakov in the kiss and cry and even with the cameras trained on him, he didn’t put his signature smile in place allowing, for the first time, the audience to witness a moment of vulnerability.  Then the scores posted.  He sat in fourth just below Otabek.  The audience hushed waiting to see how he would take it but any dissent from the fans died as he smiled and seemed satisfied.

 

The press hit hard demanding to know whether or not recent events were still affecting his program.  He laughed but Yuuri heard the edge in his voice.  “How could it not?”

 

Later, alone and safe in his husband’s arms, he fell apart.  “I should have dropped out.”

 

“You were beautiful.  You surprised the audience.  You were right to skate.  You earned this spot.”

 

“What if tomorrow it all falls apart?”

 

Yuuri smiled stroking away his tears.  “That’s me any given skate.  You keep fighting.  Even if your mind screams at you that you failed, that you are defeated, you shove that down and keep fighting.”

 

Victor held tight to Yuuri as they fell asleep.  He now had a greater appreciation for what Yuuri went through and the courage he had to keep fighting.

  


* * *

  
  


Fourth from the end, Victor took the ice meeting his husband’s warm brown eyes.  The announcer announced his program, [ Shared Tears ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nULXNDYOykI), choreographed by Katsuki Yuuri.  Victor smiled.  He insisted on this acknowledgement even though Yuuri fought him on it.  It was time others recognized his talent.

 

The soft piano blended with the strings of the orchestra as Victor moved into his soft movements.  The audience was drawn in at once.  Victor pivoted left, then toe hopped to the side, pulling into backwards crossovers and extending back into an Ina Bauer, he arched his back, arms spreading wide from his torso.  Then he rose, bringing the left arm across his body and twisting into a triple axel.  This was different.  Something they had not seen in so many reinventions of self.  He closed his eyes momentarily and remembered Yuuri’s words.   _Don’t focus on the numbers.  Just tell a story._

 

He opened them back up and he felt the somber uplift of the music, the hope hidden within slowly coming alive.  Yuuri chose this piece for him and he understood it was more than finding something that would allow his body to heal.  His soul needed healing as well.  Whether he said the words or not, Yuuri knew he struggled almost as much as his husband over the last year.  When Yuuri hurt, he hurt.

 

The music wrapped around him like any piece Yuuri would select.  A piece designed to pull something intangible from him.  He gave into the music and let the choreography flow from him an extension of the music himself.  Using backwards powerpulls to cross the ice, he twisted in choctaws, showing the start and stop he had felt so often through his recovery.  Music danced out of him in a way that he’d only seen from Yuuri but he embraced this piece as he embraced his husband, his partner, his lover.  The music surged and he followed through, back straight as the spiral shot across the ice, he allowed his right arm to gently fall down from this body.  Rising he considered the arm, as if a stranger to him, then watched it rise above him, pulling him off the ice, finding its new strength.  He allowed the sorrows to slowly fall away as the peace settled around him.

 

There was no hesitation this time.   _Sparrow_ was about the beauty of brokenness.  This song was about growth from brokenness.  It did not hold to a mournful end.  The audience erupted into applause coming to their feet.  No one would doubt his Yuuri’s choreography.  He did it justice even given the short time he had to refine it.  Yuuri stood waiting and he went directly to his husband’s arms.  As he waited in the kiss and cry for his scores, the ice was being cleared before Otabek’s program.  And as the score was announced, it certainly didn’t break his record but he was solidly in first.  He didn’t lose position.  Squeezing Yuuri’s hand, he leaned over.  “We need to get you ready.”

 

“I am ready,” the younger man confirmed.  Victor studied the man before him who had gone through so much.  If anyone had been through fire, it had been his husband.  He stood before Victor with quiet reserve, refined and confident, elegant and graceful.  There was nothing boastful in his movements or statements.  Simple confidence.  Victor could not help but smile at the beauty that was Yuuri.

 

“I can’t wait to see you dance for me,” he murmured.  Yuuri smiled, a tinge of pink blushing his cheeks.

 

Yuuri moved to where he would enter the ice as Victor stepped over where he would meet him.  Otabek come off the ice and met Yuuri with a respectful nod.  Yuuri waited for the ice to be cleared of flowers and teddy bears.  He glanced back and saw Yura focused on the scores but there was something off about the young man.  He’d been struggling over the last month, his body growing and maturing, his balance feeling off as a result.  The short program seemed to indicate he had everything back under control.  Now Yuuri wasn’t so sure.

 

Yura seemed to feel his stare.  He met his eyes with focused green eyes.  “Make me fight for every point,” was all he said.  Yuuri smiled.  He knew the ice tiger would accept no hand outs.  And Yuuri never intended to give them.  In the unspoken spirit of competition among friends, respect came from the push, the demand to never give an inch, to keep the competition pure.

 

Yuuri stepped onto the ice as Otabek’s score was announced.  Yuuri smiled as his eyes found Victor’s.  His husband made podium.  That was assured.  As he came before him, Yuuri lifted happy eyes.  “You made it.”

 

Victor nodded with a serene smile.  Running the back of his fingers over Yuuri’s cheek, he murmured, “This isn’t about me at the moment.  Show me your beauty.”  Then he leaned forward brushing their lips together in the barest of moments, so fast that the press were uncertain what they were seeing as Victor leaned forward further to whisper in his ear.  “I love you.”

 

“I love you, too,” Yuuri returned in his soft whisper.  He then skated backwards and took his position.

 

The [ story ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rwvF1Lgh61w) had changed and Victor could see it.  Yuuri’s tentative love as he stumbled out of the darkness of his attack. Yuuri’s turn to embrace him and hold onto him with all he had.  The way they guided each other and motivated one another.  This was about Yuuri but there was a whisper of Victor in the background at the beginning building in the presence of the violin poised against the piano.  This was another arrangement and he knew he must have contacted Natalia.  He pinpointed the place in the music where they married, the moment echoed by a kiss to the ring on his fingers.  Victor blinked back the tears, felt the smile on his face. _Ah, Yuuri...you know I love surprises._  He didn’t know when Yuuri changed the arrangement, when he transitioned the choreography.  Then again, he spent his afternoons in the ballet studio.  And he could see a bit of the tiger’s influence.   _Damnit, they both worked on it together._  He then heard more instruments filtering into the music and he realized the movement was opening up to include family, the kids they wanted to pull into their life and a third instrument that he knew would represent Yura.  Victor’s eyes misted as his husband finished with his hands clasped over his heart.

 

He met his husband as he exited the ice handing him his guards.  Yuuri then accepted the water bottle.  He felt breathless, the program thirty seconds longer than before.  “I don’t know when you put that together…”

 

Yuuri winked.  “When you weren’t looking.  It was a good excuse to spend time with Yura as well and mend some fences.”  At Victor’s raised eyebrow, he added, “He’s been struggling and emotional and a bit oversensitive.  He needed a project.  I had this new version of _Yuuri on Ice_ I wanted to use and so we sat down together and broke it apart.”

 

“It was worth it,” Victor stated.  “So beautiful, and you know I love a surprise.”

 

He was holding onto Victor, leaning into his arms as his scores were announced.  His eyes went wide.  “That’s higher than…”

 

“I know.”

 

“That means…”

 

“Yes, you are currently in first.  Now, let’s see what our little tiger can do.”

 

They called out “Davai” to him and noted the shaky smile quickly covered up by a look of defiance.  The two skaters exchanged looks.  “He’s nervous,” Yuuri whispered.

 

Victor nodded.

 

And soon it came out why.  Yuri, who could typically skate flawlessly, had a rough night.  Yuuri’s eyes narrowed as he noticed each overbalance and the following overcompensating move.  He didn’t fall.  He didn’t even touch down.  But there was something obviously off in the program.  Still, Yura kept fighting and pushing.  “We’ve worked every day to help him restore his center of balance and he has complained every day that something else feels off.  I should have dragged him down and worked with him this morning.”  Victor heard the self-blame in Yuuri’s voice.

 

“He knew where to find you and that you wouldn’t mind, _lyubov moya_ ,” Victor reassured him.

 

As Yura came off the ice, his expression was set with his head held high in defiance.  He knew he dropped in scores and soon it became apparent.  Yuuri took World gold and he looked to the blond with mixed emotions.  The blond waved him off.  “Go!  You earned it.”  There was an edge of anger to it but Yuuri knew it wasn’t towards him.  The boy was mad at himself and wouldn’t tolerate the comfort that Yuuri wanted to offer, not just yet.  He turned to Victor and could see the warring emotions between pride for his husband and acceptance of his own weakness.  There was something almost bitter to this win because he knew two of his biggest contenders were fighting their own battles.  It was Otabek’s calm voice that started him out of his thoughts.  “We honor them by accepting our wins with pride.  They will be there to challenge us again.”

 

During the medal ceremony, Yuuri held onto Victor’s hand as they placed the gold around his neck and he turned to see Victor smiling up at him.  He now seemed at peace with the results and squeezed Yuuri’s hand in quiet assurance.  Otabek faced forward as the hero of his country.

 

The press conference that followed was brutal.

 

“Mr. Nikiforov, do you think you would have won if you had not changed your choreography?”

 

“Honestly, no.  I think I would have performed even more poorly.”

 

This caused a startled murmur among the press and the initial reporter pressed with “Why?”

 

Victor exchanged a glance with his husband.  “Because my shoulder is still recovering from when I was held captive.  In fact, I will be having surgery next week.  I’m pulling from the Grand Prix series for the coming season.”

 

The press erupted in a buzz of talk.  A quick onslaught of questions hit about the kidnapping and their reaction towards the sentencing.  Yuuri responded with two words.  “It’s over.”

 

They then focused on Yuuri.  “You also changed your choreography.”

 

“I did.  If you’ve paid attention you’d notice that it’s been evolving all season, changing as my own story has changed.”

 

“What do you have in store next season?”

 

“Victor and I are going to work together on my choreography as he recovers from his surgery.”

 

“Can any of you speculate as to what happened with Yuri Plisetsky’s performance tonight?”

 

They met each other’s eyes, their protective instincts all going up.  It was Victor who spoke.  “Of course we can speculate.  You are doing so yourself.  However, any given skate something could throw us off.  For some of us, it could be an injury.  For others, it could be their mental state.  Life events affect us.  Unexpected losses.  Or even our skate not quite sitting right.  So, yes we can, but no we will not.  We support all of our skaters who came out to skate.  It was a great competition and nobody gave anything away.  That’s what we all ask.  That we all come to compete whether we are friends are just colleagues, there is a respect on that ice.  And when one of us falls, stumbles, loses control...we all feel it.  Because we’ve all been there.  We all know what it’s like.  But we also know that we are expected to put our all into a competition.  To do any less disrespects the other skaters.”

  


* * *

  


They found Yuri later, but he pushed everyone away.  “He’s still licking his wounds,” Otabek stated quietly.

 

At the banquet, they were all there, but Yuri kept off to himself.  They didn’t intrude.  Otabek was close and he slowly let the Kazakh in and by the end of the evening, they were in quiet conversation.

 

Yuuri and Victor were being hounded by sponsors.  When Yuuri’s energy level flagged, though, Victor pulled him onto the dance floor where they waltzed, Yuuri’s head resting on his husband’s shoulder, a moment of quiet.

 

“Have you heard from home?” Victor whispered.

 

“Boris has us set up for home studies once we get moved and settled.”

 

“Good.  I want our family home.  With us.”

 

“We’ll move after the surgery.  Hire people to do it so we can just supervise.”

 

“We need some furniture and the kid’s rooms are bare.”

 

“It will come together in time, Victor.  Let’s get you through your surgery first then focus on the recovery.”

 

Victor leaned onto his husband, holding him tightly.  At one time it was Yuuri relying completely on him.  Somewhere along the way, Victor learned to lean back, to rely on Yuuri.  And this was his peace.

 

____

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to find another arrangement of Yuri! On Ice but alas the ones with piano and violin even lacked the right depth. So I hope you are able to see my vision for the music as I’ve written it. :)


	52. Chapter 52

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mending and healing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I wrote a Yuuri birthday chapter...but it will spoil the next two chapters. So I'm going to wait and post it until weekend. Which means...enjoy this chapter before a few tears...but sunshine is coming.
> 
> Thanks so much to BluSkates and Magrathea for taking care of me!
> 
> Thanks to the rest of you for your support as readers.

* * *

 

 

Victor drifted in and out of consciousness.  He was dimly aware of doctors and nurses.  Light shining in his eyes.  A snap of the fingers.  Questions.  Then darkness again.  When he came back, he heard a soft humming.  It took a moment before he discerned that it was Yuuri humming one of the songs he skated to.  “Yuuri,” he whispered.  Warm hands grasped his.  A glass of water was held up to his lips.  He drank then slept once more.

 

The next time he woke up, his head felt a little clearer.  He glanced around the room and his eyes caught on a crop of blond hair.  “Yura!”

 

The ice tiger looked up from his phone and frowned.  “You weren’t supposed to wake up until Katsudon returned.”

 

“You stayed with me!”

 

“Oh, god!  You are going to get gushy, aren’t you?”  Green eyes rolled back.

 

Victor smiled a loose smile, still hazy from the anesthesia.  “I knew you loved me!”

 

“Shut up, old man!”

 

“Don’t be like that, Yura!  You’re my family!”  Victor reached out a sluggish hand toward the blond.

 

“Whatever!” he huffed.  But slowly those slender fingers found Victor’s in a gentle squeeze.

 

“No, really.  You know I love you, Yura!”

 

“Oh, god, Victor!  Save it for Katsudon!”  And with that the hand slapped away from Victor’s grasp.

 

“You’re like my own…” he hesitated looking for the right word.  “I would have adopted you back then if they would have let me.  Kid brother doesn’t go far enough.”

 

Yuri stilled.  Then he sniffed.  “You ass!  Now look what you’ve done.”  He rubbed at his eyes with the heels of his hands.  He knew exactly the time that Victor meant.  It had only been three years.  They said Victor was too young to be co-guardian, if he had been a blood relative it would have been different.  That’s why Yuri was placed in Yakov’s care.  “Damnit, old man!”  But Victor was asleep once more.

 

When Victor came to again, he was facing Yuuri who was stretched out next to him on the hospital bed playing with his hair.  The sun had gone down and his head felt a little clearer.  “Welcome back,” he greeted softly.

 

Victor hugged him close with his good arm.  “Thank you for being here.”  After a moment, he added, “I think I scared Yura away.”

 

Yuuri chuckled.  “He’ll get over it.”

 

Victor stared up at his husband.  “I love you.”

 

Another warm vibration came from Yuuri.  “Yura said you were mushy.”

 

“But I mean it!” he insisted emphatically.

 

“I know, love,” Yuuri responded indulgently.  He brushed a kiss on top of Victor’s head and repeated, “I know.”

 

* * *

 

A day after surgery, Victor was released with specific instructions that were also conveyed to Yuuri and his coach.  Physical therapy, aquatic therapy added later, pain medicine, appointments, Yuuri wrote everything down and confirmed his understanding.  Once he felt clear, he led Victor out to the SUV and, with Yakov’s help, loaded him up into the back seat before they took the front.  Yuuri cautiously pulled out of the parking lot and turned toward home.

 

“I want to see the kids,” Victor pouted.

 

“Not today.  Let’s give your shoulder a couple of days to heal.”

 

“But…”

 

“I’ve already explained it to them both,” Yuuri stated patiently.  “They know how to reach us but understand we can’t be there for the moment.”

 

At their home, boxes laid about with some incidental packing.  “I thought we were hiring people to have this done,” Victor pouted because he knew he wouldn’t be useful.

 

“We are, love.  Don’t worry.  I just started because I was restless.”

 

Two days later, they visited the children.  Nina ran up excitedly but Andrei grabbed hold of her before she jumped up on Victor.  “Nina!  Remember, Victor’s shoulder.”

 

She opened her mouth in surprise.  “I’m sorry,” she said softly dropping her eyes.

 

Victor frowned, and with Yuuri steadying him, went down to his knees so that he was on her level.  “It’s okay, Ninotchka,” he assured her.  “I would still love a hug.”

 

That seemed to brighten her up.  She snuggled up into his arms and rested her head on his good shoulder.  “Are you going to be okay, Papa?”  Her voice was small and he knew she needed reassurance.

 

“It’s just a little surgery.  Sometimes our bodies don’t heal so easily on its own and need a little help.”

 

She sighed a world weary sigh.  “I know what you mean.  Hospitals scare me.  Were you scared?”

 

Victor started to say _no_ but then realized she needed truth.  “Yeah, a bit.  I knew everything was going to be okay but there was that _what if_ in the back if my mind.  That scared me.  And them putting me asleep.  That scared me.”

 

She patted his cheek and kissed his cheekbone.  “I don’t like the thing they put in your nose...and all the needles.”  She tucked her forehead into the crook of his neck.  “I...don’t always know.”

 

Victor held onto her, his eyes misting.  He looked up and caught Yuuri’s chocolate brown eyes looking onto them both, his hand in Nina’s curls.  Andrei hung back just a fraction, close to Yuuri’s elbow, his own expression sober.  Nina finally pulled back and smiled, her sunshine back in place to chase away the clouds.  “Did you bring the puppies?”

 

Victor laughed.  “Yes.  We thought maybe a walk in the park but someone’s going to have to help Yuuri with the dogs.”  He caught Andrei’s eyes with a smile.

 

“I suppose...Nina and I can help.”  Andrei was a lot like Yuuri, brimming with confidence one minute followed by an uncertain shyness the next.

 

At the park, the children handled Makkachin’s lead and Nina’s squeals and giggles were reflected back in Andrei’s laugh as they skipped along.  Spring was starting to make its appearance and Makkachin was curious about the new smells.  Cocoa stayed close to Yuuri, quiet and patient until Yuuri unhooked her lead at a small patch near the pond.  The dog trotted over to the children and kept watch, taking part of the antics until Yuuri called her back.  Victor caught the moments in black and white stills and Yuuri had his phone out, laughing and smiling.  It was a good day, but Yuuri could tell Victor’s energy wanned fast.

 

“I don’t want to cut this short,” Victor complained as Yuuri called Cocoa in.  The children soon followed.

 

Andrei studied Victor then looked over to Yuuri.  “Maybe we can get something to eat before you take us home,” he suggested.  “I have homework and the damp air might make Nina sick.”  Yuuri smiled.   _Damn, that boy is smart._

 

Nina pouted.  “I’m not going to get sick.”

 

Victor and Yuuri chuckled.  “Maybe it will be warmer next time we come out.  I know this damp air makes my shoulder hurt.”  Victor normally wouldn’t complain.  Certainly not for himself.  But he met Andrei’s eyes and the _thank you_ within them.

 

Nina’s eyes had gone wide.  “Oh, I don’t want Papa to hurt!  Okay.”  She became most compliant after that and soon they had them back home, fed and much happier.  As they were about to leave, Nina held onto Yuuri.  “When will we get to come home with you?”

 

“I hope soon, Nichan,” he murmured, the little girl cuddled more into his embrace.  Yuuri brushed a kiss into her curls.  Victor had an arm draped around Andrei’s shoulder in a side hug.  And then they left, bittersweet, happy to have spent time with them yet sad to leave them behind.

 

Yuuri sniffed in the car and quickly wiped away the tears.  Victor wasn’t much better.

 

* * *

 

A week after surgery, they closed on the house and began the process of moving.  Packers boxed up the gatehouse and movers picked them up to cart the items over.  They went furniture shopping as Victor’s strength allowed.  Rooms began to fill and the house started to look like a home.

 

Their room came together first.  Modern mixed with traditional style, stormy grays mixing with billowy whites of the linens.  A large photo taken by Phichit in black and white except for their sweaters, Yuuri’s in deep navy, Victor’s in a wide red and white stripe.  It captured them in a private moment laughing, Yuuri in Victor’s arms, his eyes looking up at Victor in unmistakable adoration.  They would have to put that picture away when the actual house was inspected but for now, it watched over them like a sentinel guarding their happiness.

 

They settled into their bed, the cotton white sheets smelling faintly of _Eros_ tugging a smile from Victor’s lips.  As Victor wrapped his arms around Yuuri from behind, he murmured, “We’re that much closer to bringing our family home.”  He snuggled up to Yuuri and kissed the nape of his neck but could feel the tension in his husband.

 

Yuuri sighed.  “My head keeps throwing up roadblocks.  I’m so afraid it’s all going to fall apart around us.”

 

“Trust Boris,” Victor murmured.  “And trust my attorneys.  We’ve got people pulling for us on both sides of this equation.”

 

He could feel the doubt in Yuuri’s nod.  Yuuri’s hands tightened over his.  “I’m sorry I’m so scared.”

 

Nuzzling the brunette’s ear, he said softly, “We’ve been on edge for over a year.  I’m sure it’ll take a while for your anxiety to normalize.”

 

Yuuri laughed bitterly.  “Normalize.  If only I could grasp normal.”

 

“Normal for you doesn’t have to be normal for everyone else, _lyubov moya_ ,” he clarified, pressing his cheek into Yuuri’s hair.  “Our normal doesn’t have to be normal for everyone else.  It’s what works for us.  And we’re in this together.”

 

Yuuri turned into his arms and drew in a shaky breath.  Victor leaned forward and kissed him, deepening it as if he was giving Yuuri his life’s breath.  Yuuri shuddered as the kiss broke, “Vitya…”

 

“My Yuuri, let your worries go tonight and simply let me love you.”  He then worked the kiss back towards Yuuri’s ear nibbling the lobe before dipping down.

 

“Don’t do anything to strain your shoulder,” Yuuri warned, but he was in a losing battle of resistance as Victor continued to kiss him, moving down to his neck and collarbone.  Yuuri’s fingers fluttered into Victor’s hair, his legs opening to welcome the growing need between them.

 

“I want to feel you surround me.  Is that okay?”  Victor’s eyes swept over Yuuri who know lay naked beneath him, his brown eyes focusing on Victor’s shoulder.  “I’m not hurting and I won’t do anything to hurt my shoulder.  If I need to hold your leg back…”

 

“Put a pillow underneath me.  Then you shouldn’t have to,” Yuuri suggested and Victor realized he was thinking of the best way to accommodate him, not to push him away.  They hadn’t come together since before the surgery, neither happy about that.  Lifting his hips, he tugged a pillow free and handed it to Victor who stuffed it under Yuuri.  His husband then reached for the lube off the nightstand and handed it over.

 

Victor frowned as he took it.  “We may have to start putting these things away.  I don’t want to scandalize the kids.”

 

Yuuri chuckled.  “Like when Yura followed me into our room at the gatehouse only to turn around and leave red faced.  I didn’t realize you had the dildo on the bed drying.”

 

“It’s always important to clean your toys!” Victor defended.

 

“I agree, but I also agree that we need to find a place to put them,” Yuuri answered with a grin.

 

“I suppose I can’t continue to bribe Yura for his forgiveness,” Victor conceded.

 

Yuuri smirked.  “He did demand a shopping trip out of the deal.”

 

“My credit card cringed at the amount of animal print I charged,” Victor pouted.

 

“It’s okay, love.  Nina shares your love of pink,” he teased.  “Now, we are getting rather distracted from matters at hand.”  He pressed his hand against the bottle in Victor’s grasp grounding Victor back to the present.  “Are we going to do this?”

 

Victor winked.  “Of course.”  He squeezed a dollop into his right hand, leaning forward on his left to dip down and kiss Yuuri’s lips.  As the kiss became more heated, he allowed his fingers to tease Yuuri’s entrance, his lover relaxing under his seeking touch and opening easily to him.  It always astounded him how Yuuri trusted him in moments like this, barriers dropping to welcome him inside.  He pushed back on his supportive hand to take in his husband’s expression, his mouth open, his eyes heavy lidded, his breathing focused, his body laid out before him, open and accepting.  “One of these days, I’m going to take a picture of you like this.”

 

“As long as you don’t show anyone,” was all the restriction he received from the man beneath him.   _Fuck!_  He thought that would be a hard fought permission.

 

“I never want anyone else to see you like this,” Victor agreed possessively.  “My beautiful Yuuri.”  He dipped down to taste those lips once more as he introduced another finger.  Yuuri relaxed to his touch even more and Victor was amazed how quickly he opened up after a couple of weeks of no sex.  Pulling his hand free, he swatted Yuuri’s ass.  “Can you put your leg over my shoulder?”

 

Yuuri frowned, not so far gone to skip considering the consequences.  “On your left, maybe...but can we try without it?  It won’t be as deep but I don’t want…”

 

“How about this?”  Victor caught up Yuuri’s right knee in his elbow as he pressed forward, lining up.  He watched Yuuri’s face change as he pushed through the barrier, filling Yuuri’s heat surround him.  He paused for a moment to breath through the change in environment.  Yuuri held his eyes, his lips mouthing the word _more_ though no sound came out.  Victor nodded and pushed further into him.  Yuuri’s body had amazing give when it came to accepting Victor, tightening around him but he could still feel the ease of Yuuri’s relaxed state.  Finally seated deep within him, he murmured, “Do you know how beautiful you are at this moment?”

 

Yuuri chuckled softly, that laughter vibrating along Yuuri’s core and down Victor’s length causing his breath to catch.  “I will soon because apparently you’re planning to take pictures.”  His eyes sparkled mischievously and it was at that moment Victor realized that he not only received permission, Yuuri wanted it.

 

Victor shook his head in surprise, a wicked smile settling onto his features.  “I’ll be better prepared next time,” he promised.

 

“For now, Vitya,” Yuuri murmured, his finger tracing down the side of Victor’s face before his eyes took on that glint once more as he finished his sentence, “Move, damn it.”

 

Victor chuckled.  How much he loved this man!  He teased Yuuri with slow movements in and out and was rewarded with a frustrated pout.  But he also didn’t miss those hands knotting into the sheets.  “It feels good,” Victor affirmed.

 

“Mmmhmm...need more, though,” Yuuri answered and Victor could see the tense line on his chin.

 

“Harder?”

 

Yuuri nodded with a soft whine.

 

“Faster?”

 

“Yesss,” he expelled with his breath.  Victor chuckled as he adjusted his hold.  It was a little tricky with his bad shoulder but using his good arm to bear the brunt of the movements, he found a way to make it work.  “Don’t hurt that shoulder,” Yuuri muttered.  Victor laughed.  Of course Yuuri would want it both ways.

 

“Well, you’re going to have to help, then.”

 

“Let go of my damn leg and I will,” Yuuri demanded.  His eyes held onto Victor and he felt the strength in them.  Victor lowered the leg and Yuuri wrapped them, one around his ass and one down his thigh.  Victor felt his insistent movements meeting him halfway, open and demanding.  He also heard his cries as he let go.  He loved it when Yuuri let himself go like this, lost in the feeling, chasing after his own pleasure.  This was a sight he wanted to capture on film, Yuuri caught up in himself, lost in desire, his fingers reaching down and tugging at his own length.

 

Then he felt it, Yuuri clenching down on him as his orgasm surged through him.  He spilled hard across his stomach and Victor found he wasn’t far behind, his walls pulling him on through.  Breathless, he collapsed onto his lover.  He felt hands tangle into his hair.  They’ll have to shower.  But for now, they clung to each other.

 

He could feel Yuuri’s restlessness beneath him and then Yuuri muttered in a wry voice, “I don’t think that was part of your physical therapy.”

 

“Fine motor skills,” he argued.

 

Yuuri huffed, guiding Victor off his stomach carefully.  “Are you okay?”

 

Victor nodded.  “I didn’t stress it.  I promise.”

 

“Let me get a shower running.  You join me, okay?”

 

Victor nodded.  He laid back staring at the ceiling as he listened to the water running.  This was their first house they bought and would live in.  Sure they had their onsen back in Hasetsu, but it was still in the process of remodeling.  This house already felt warm to Victor.  It felt...like family.  He rolled out of bed and stumbled after Yuuri.  His husband was humming and after a few bars he recognized _Stammi Vicino_.  Slipping in behind hind him, he murmured, “Don’t worry, love...I’m never letting you go.”  Yuuri leaned into him even as his lips found the crook of his neck.  “I love you.”


	53. Chapter 53

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sunshine before the rain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We see a dip into Yura's past in this one as well. Some fluff. Soft smiles. And the final stage of the home study.
> 
> Thank you, Magrathea and BluSkates, for your edits.

* * *

 

Nina squealed as she ran out to greet Yuuri and Victor, Andrei followed in her wake.  “Where are you taking us?” he asked curiously.

 

“We thought we’d go to the zoo,” Victor answered as he guided them to the SUV.  Nina turned and jumped up and down in excitement.  He started to scoop her up when Yuuri stopped him.  He sighed.   _ Damn shoulder _ .  Yuuri lifted her up to his level and he dropped his forehead to hers.  “Do you like the zoo?”

 

“I’ve never been,” she rattled, almost breathless.  Then she turned and spotted Yuri in the vehicle.  She crawled through the window and into his arms.  The youth’s eyes widened as he accepted her little form into his arms, settling her next to him and buckling her into the middle seat belt.  Andrei walked around and climbed into the opposite door.  Soon they were maneuvering into traffic.

 

An hour later, they caught up to the lines that led them into the zoo.  “Do you think they have wolves?”

 

“Maybe.  They are endangered, so rescue organizations sometimes hand them over to the zoo,” Yuuri explained.  “My friend Ashley volunteered at a refuge in Colorado as part of her internship.  They were allowed to stay wild there.”

 

The family was given bracelets that would allow them to hop on and off the various trolleys and trains that transported patrons around the zoo.  Nina wound her hand into Yuri’s.  Giving him a tug, she whispered not so quietly, “I want wolf ears.”

 

Yuri grinned whispering back, “I bet we can get the old man to get you a pair.”  Victor raised an eyebrow as he snuck into the gift shop.  He came out a few minutes later with not only wolf ears, but a set of tiger ears for Yura.  Also among the selection were bear ears, bunny ears, and fox ears.  Yuuri’s kitsune-gao features demanded he grab those, securing the headband in place.  Andrei looked from one to another, blanching at first before giving in and taking the bear ears.  Victor grinned, happy to be left with rabbit ears.

 

“Anything else, my lady?” he asked with a flourishing bow.

 

She touched her lip imitating Victor.  “I’ll think about it.”

 

The boys chuckled.  Her hand once more securely wound into Yura’s, they walked down the path.  Yuuri leaned in and whispered in a very quiet voice, “Someone has a crush.”

 

“You think?” Victor responded with a wink.

 

They started with the exotic birds, Victor dropping a few coins to let them in to feed the lorikeets.  It was worth it to see her giggle as the birds flew around her as she held out her cup.  Coming to the other side, they found themselves within the blooming butterfly garden.  Another cup, this time full of nectar, enticed them to come to her.

 

The first large animal they found was the giraffe.  Nina now rode on Yuuri’s shoulders and he had to tighten his hold on her as she began to bounce up and down in excitement.  Yuuri chuckled as he watched Victor point and bounce along with her, encouraging her enthusiasm.

 

They took a break near the petting zoo, letting the teens have a little freedom to look through the  reptile enclosure while they watched her chase after pigmy goats.  Yuuri grinned as he looked towards Victor who had his camera out once more.  He then handed it over to Yuuri and followed her in.  At some point, Nina found herself sitting in Victor’s crisscrossed legs as the goats climbed over them.  She laughed in delight as one climbed over Victor’s shoulder and jumped.  Victor was glad he had his bad shoulder turned away from them.  

 

The boys returned and shook their head at the spectacle.  Yuuri just shrugged.  This was his life, and Victor could be as much a kid as any of them.

 

The next stop was the wolves’ enclosure and Nina bounced around in excitement.  Victor made sure he took pictures for her, including one in which she pressed her face intently against the glass, wide eyed, focused on the wolves.  The boys laughed in delight when she howled for them.

 

The tigers came soon after.  This led into an argument between the oldest and youngest child as to which was better, tigers or wolves.  Andrei hung back watching with a soft smile on his face.  Turning to Yuuri he murmured, “I think this is the best day she’s had.  Thank you for that.”

 

“I want her life to be filled with best days,” he answered.

 

All days come to an end, though, and clouds started to gather overhead.  Catching the shuttle back to the entrance, they made it to their vehicle just before the rain broke through.  Nina turned and hid her eyes into Yuri’s side, his arm going protectively around her.

 

“She’s scared of storms,” Andrei stated quietly.  “Mama used to sing when it would storm.”

 

Victor met Yuuri’s eyes momentarily.  His rich tenor then began the lyrics to  [ Fly Little Feather ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IlaqjRxHueU) , Yuuri joining in as the familiar phrases filled his memories.  That seemed to relax her some.  Yura and Victor then followed up with the [ Cossack Lullaby ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wUi8We2gs7k) .  Andrei then leaned forward to ask Yuuri if he could sing something from Japan.  Yuuri frowned thoughtfully, remembering a song he used to comfort someone he loved.   [ The Spinning Song ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zxx4z64GH38) slipped from his lips as he closed his eyes remembering the lilt of the instruments and the beat of the drums.  The others listened in rapt fascination, Yuuri’s rich voice ringing soft and comforting.  They finished up the trip with  [ Once Upon a December ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E9JPqJDRNQg) .  By this point, Nina was curled up asleep into Yuri’s side.

 

They allowed Yura to carry Nina into the home and settle her into bed.  The youth smiled tightly towards Andrei, the two younger kids a little jealous that Yuri would get to go home with their chosen parents.  “I’m sure it won’t be long,” he said quietly.

 

* * *

  
  


It was Yura’s first trip to the new house.  “I hope Katsudon is cooking,” he pressed as they went inside.  Yuri stopped as he stepped into the living room, his eyes wide as his eyes fell across the pictures in the living room.  The wall was a gallery of family, blood and otherwise.  Victor’s mother’s picture was in prominent display along with Yuuri’s parents.  Yakov and Lilia were close by with a collage of their skate family.  Most were black and white but Yuri didn’t know when they were taken.  Sometime recently.  Then he remembered he’d seen Victor with a camera.

 

Flowing the opposite direction were pictures of Yuuri’s Japanese family, his sister, Yuuko and Takeshi, Minako, the triplets.  These stretched out into extended family including Yuuri’s Detroit skate family.  He spotted a picture of Chris and Phichit together.  “I didn’t think that was ever going to resolve itself,” he murmured.

 

Yuuri chuckled.  “I think we were all wondering about them.”

 

_ Seung-gil...and Sara? _  The picture wasn’t meant to show them as a couple but more of an unguarded moment caught.  Still, Yura could see something between them.  “When did they…” he began.

 

“Oh, as far as we know, they’re not.  But Yuuri is a bit of a matchmaker,” Victor teased.

 

Yuuri rolled his eyes.  “You're as bad if not worse than me!”

 

Various competitions and quiet moments together.  Yuri paused, his eyes resting on a photo of Otabek, his features stoic and proud.  Yuuri rested his head against Victor’s shoulder, a soft smile on his face.

 

“We want to show you someplace else.  Come.”  Yuuri grabbed his hand and practically dragged him down the hall.  The younger Yuri cast a half scared look in Victor’s direction and only received a laugh in reply.  At the end of the hall, Yuuri threw open the door and guided Yuri inside.

 

“This...is your room.  I mean, I know it doesn’t look like it just yet.  We wanted you to personalize it.  And, well, I have to stash my things in the closet here until after the inspection.”

 

Yuri narrowed his eyes.  “What do you mean?”

 

Yuuri shrugged, his eyes dropping shyly.  “The state doesn’t like gay couples to adopt.  I have...to look like a roommate for now.”

 

Yuri’s eyes narrowed and fire sparked in that green gaze.  “That’s just bullshit!”

 

“I’m sorry,” Yuuri backtracked.  “I wanted it to just be your space right away where you could decorate it and make it your own…”  He trailed off clearly getting agitated and upset.

 

Yuri saw where he went wrong.  He shook his head.  “No, do what you’ve got to do.  I mean...it’s bullshit that the state is made up of a bunch of bigoted assholes.  Those kids love you and want to be here.”  He met Victor’s eyes.  “Is that the real reason they wouldn’t let you have me?”

 

Victor’s mouth parted in surprise.  “Yura...it was a lot more complicated than that.  They demand a fourteen year gap.  We barely have that with Andrei.  _  I _ barely have that.  And well...I was younger then.”

 

Yuri shook his head.  Three years and he still felt in limbo.  Victor came up behind him and put his hand on his shoulder.  “We don’t need a piece of paper to tell us we’re family.”

 

“It’s still fucking bullshit.  You and Yuuri shouldn’t have to hide who you are.”  He sniffed back.  Why was this affecting him so much?  Yuri shook Victor off.  “Can I be by myself for now?”

 

The other two retreated and he could hear the sigh in their movements.   _ Damnit!  I’m always hurting those who love me.  Why can’t I just leave it alone? _

 

He crawled up on the bed.  It was soft, not a cheap mattress by any means.  He stretched out appreciating the full size.  His extra height had his feet hanging off the bed at Yakov and Lilia’s.   _ I just want a place to call home.  _  Then he remembered Yuuri’s words.   _ You can decorate it and make it your own.  Is this...mine?   _ He pushed himself off the bed and wandered around the room.  It was then he spotted the little touches.  A framed picture on the dresser of Otabek and himself.  _  When did that happen?  Probably Phichit. _  Another of himself, the old man, and Katsudon.   _ That was definitely Phichit.  _  He recognized the Detroit background.  Yakov and Lilia.  Then he stilled, his fingers brushing over a frame, plain but of fine quality.  In it was a photo of Grandpa and him taken in Moscow last fall.  He felt his eyes mist.  “Grandpa…” he whispered.

 

After his cry was over, he slipped out of the room.  He could hear the murmur of voices in the living room as the television flickered.  He found his way to the bathroom and washed his face.  He needed to talk to them.  His feet were slow as they padded towards the living room.  Both of them looked up as he entered the room.  “I-I’m sorry,” he stuttered out wiping his nose.

 

And dammit, there they were with that look.  The one that said no apology necessary.  And although he normally ran from touching, when they opened their embrace to reach for him, he found himself running into it.  They hugged him close and he felt the brush of lips through his hair, not knowing which one gave it to him and not caring.

 

“We wanted you to have your room first,” Victor explained quietly as he pressed his cheek against his blond hair.  “Because you were always first.  Even though the state said  _ no _ , you always have a place with us.  Remember that, Yura.”

 

He drew a ragged breath then slid down in the floor to sit between them.  His head rested against Yuuri’s knee.  Victor’s long fingers carded through his hair.  And he...felt at home.

  
  


* * *

  
  
  


Victor and Yuuri stared at the pile of documents compiled for the final stage of the home study.  Criminal background checks had been completed months ago.  The family life and history,  laid out before them, in case something was missed.  “What if he’s wrong?  What if we shouldn’t conceal our marriage?”

 

“We didn’t deny it,” Victor reassured him.  “We simply didn’t volunteer the information.  This country doesn’t recognize it, so why would we?  The home inspection is today and after that, you can move your things back into our room.  If anyone asks, you put them there because I don’t like to share a closet.  Not a lie.”

 

Yuuri’s hands fluttered about nervously.  “I just want it over.  I want the kids home.  It’s been a long few months.”

 

“I know, love.”  A knock at the door jerked their attention.  He squeezed Yuuri’s hand and went to greet the inspector who was followed by Boris.  They spoke briefly in Russian then came in.  The inspector nodded, smiling but business-like.  “Yuuri, this is Mr. Vasiliev.  He is reviewing the home itself.”

 

They proceeded to show him around as the man checked things off of his list one by one.  Boris was quiet and Yuuri started to feel uneasy but he swallowed his fear.  At some point, Boris joined Yuuri at the table to review the documents.

 

“Your financial records and personal records are all in order.  All that’s left after today is for me to walk the adoption through to my supervisors.”

 

“Is something wrong?”

 

The other man thinned his lips.  “Some murmurs.  Probably nothing.  I’ll just be glad to see this adoption complete.”

  
  


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I based the zoo off the one found near here with nice enclosures giving the animals plenty of room. Leningrad Zoo does have a lot of negative reviews for being out of date with small enclosures. I wanted a happy experience for these kids. So I hope you will forgive me the creative latitude I took with this.


	54. Chapter 54

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dark clouds only block us from seeing the light...part 1 (Clouds)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for your support, readers and editors...and give a round of applause to my lovely editors who make time for me in their busy schedules...BluSkates and Magrathea. I think the holidays have affected a lot of writers but I'm still putting out content even if my schedule has been off a bit. I'm going to try and get back on schedule this coming week but the schedule will be changing slightly. Read end notes for more details.

* * *

 

 

Boris’ hand found something hard and heavy and threw it against the wall.  “Of all the closed-minded…”  He should have known better.  Both Victor and Yuuri were public personalities.  It wasn’t like their relationship was a secret.  In spite of all of their efforts to downplay their relationship, someone along the way became aware that Victor was gay and blocked the adoption.

 

Boris was sick.  He wanted to see those kids happily placed.  Those men loved the kids and could give them a future.  He had to tell Yuuri and Victor.  He dreaded telling them.  He should go in person.  He picked up his phone.  He didn’t know what words he said, how he delivered the bad news.  Just the words “I’m sorry.”

 

Next stop, he had to deal with Zoya.  She was not going to be pleased.  She hated false hope.  It was too hard on the children.  As he drove his broken down car along the road, he felt the dread balling in the pit of his stomach.  He was a big man but this hurt his heart.

 

Arriving, he spoke softly to Zoya.  “They blocked the adoption.  Someone recognized Victor and pointed out that he was gay.  The state won’t budge as long as it’s up to them.”

 

She frowned in a way that only Zoya could frown, rattling the bones without saying a word.  “They’ll be devastated.”

 

“I know.  Let me tell Andrei myself.”

 

Zoya called the boy downstairs.  Andrei looked from one to the other with sharp gray eyes.  “What’s wrong?”

 

“Andrei…” he began.

 

The boy shook his head.  Backing up to the door, he repeated over and over, “Nonononono.”

 

“The paperwork...:”

 

“They want us!  To hell with the paperwork!  They! Want! Us!”  Andrei’s yell held so much pain.  And Andrei was right.  The kids wanted them, too.  It should be that simple.  It wasn’t.  Andrei turned and ran out.

 

Boris frowned...torn between going after him or letting him calm down on his own.

 

* * *

  
  
  


Victor held onto Yuuri.  After the call from Boris, he made a few of his own.  Now he held onto his brokenhearted husband.   _ They connected the pieces.  It was blocked because you are gay and because you are in a relationship with a man. _  Those words rang through, louder than the apology.  They weren’t angry with Boris.  They were angry with a system that blocked two loving parents from adopting children.

 

“This isn’t right,” Yuuri stated, even as Victor rocked him lovingly in his arms.  “We love them.  I can’t imagine life without them.  Not anymore.”

 

“I’ve made some calls.  We aren’t through fighting.”  Victor’s firm words held more confidence than he was feeling inside.

 

Yuuri nodded and sniffed.  He knew Victor called his attorneys about the matter right after the call disconnected.

 

Yuuri’s phone rang and he looked to see Boris’ name on the caller ID.  Looking up at Victor, he hesitantly answered the phone.  “Hello?”  He winced at how flat his voice sounded.  He still hurt but he knew Boris was his friend.

 

“I’m sorry, Yuuri, I know this is a bad time but...is Andrei with you?”

 

“No?  Why?” Yuuri shifted from hurt to concern in a moment.

 

“He...ran out right after I broke the news to him.  I gave him some time to pull it together but it’s starting to get late and he still hasn’t come home.  I’ve called his other haunts.  I’m starting to worry.”

 

Yuuri looked up at Victor, his own worry crowding out his grief as he conveyed the information.  Victor pulled out his phone and called Yakov.  Returning to the call, he stated, “We’re on our way with help.”

 

* * *

  
  


They paired off, each group assigned a zone.  Yuuri and Victor.  Lilia and Georgi.  Yuri and Yakov.  Dmitry and Ivan.  Mila and Boris.  Lev brought others from the gym.  They broke the neighborhood up into smaller sections and assigned them to each pair.

 

An hour had passed since the search began.  Yuri walked with Yakov in the small section southwest of the home his eyes combing back and forth down alleys when he spotted a small movement.  There was something familiar in that coat.  A little nicer than this neighborhood.  “Yakov, I think that might be him,” he whispered.  “Stay here.”   As he approached the person, he saw the boy pressing himself further into the corner of the building in the alley.  The blond sighed.  It  _ was  _ Andrei.  Yuri knelt before the younger teen.  “Are you afraid they’ll give up?  They may have to step back, but there’s got to be a way around this.”

 

“How?”  The hopelessness and raw pain was evident in the younger boy.  “The government knows they are gay.  They aren’t going to let them have us.”  He looked down and blinked through his tears.  “No one else will want us either.  It’s a...fucked up system.”

 

Yuri tightened his lips.  He knew Andrei didn’t tend to use profanity, it was an indication of his stress and fear.  Maybe he needed to know how powerful Victor could be when someone threatened someone he cared about.  “Victor’s lawyers are expensive,” he began.  “They know ways to fight the state at their own game.”  He looked at his hands and considered how much of his story he wanted to share.  “The state was trying to take me from my Grandpa because he was sick.  He...still is.”  He shrugged.  Grandpa was in the hospital off and on but now he didn’t have to worry about Yuri.  “Victor turned his lawyers onto it.  They found a way for me to stay in Grandpa’s custody.  I have Yakov and Lilia as co-guardians in the process but that’s not unusual.  They’re my coaches.”

 

Andrei loosened the hold he had on his knees as he listened, tears still resting on his cheek but drying.  “You think...they are still fighting?”

 

“I bet the first call they made after Boris left was to their lawyers.”  He watched Andrei loosen his body and open up some.  He leaned forward and added, “I also bet Nina is scared and worried about you.”

 

Andrei looked up, surprised.  In all of this, he had forgotten about his sister.  “I-I said that if they could only adopt one, let it be my sister.  I...didn’t think about how much it would hurt.”

 

“It hurts to be left behind.  I thought...I was being left behind.  But I should have known Victor and Katsudon leave no one behind.  Give them the time they need and trust them.”  Yuri waited for Andrei to nod before standing up.  “Let’s go home.”

 

By the time Yuri coaxed Andrei out of the alley, Victor and Yuuri were there along with all of the others looking for him.  He ran into Victor and Yuuri’s arms.  “Please...don’t leave me.”

 

Victor kissed the top of his head feeling his tears renew.  Yuuri held him tight in a hug.  Victor spoke softly but adamantly as he pressed his cheek against the blond head.  “This is a roadblock but this isn’t over, Andryusha.”  The boy snuggled closer to them at the use of the diminutive feeling its attachment.  If Victor and Yuuri were still fighting, so was he.

  
  


* * *

  
  
  


The friends parted after assuring themselves the boy was okay.  Yuuri, Victor, and Yuri joined Boris in walking Andrei back home.  “Nina is going to be mad.”  Then his eyes widened.  “Miss Zoya’s going to be mad!”

 

“Let me deal with her,” Boris stated as he patted the boy on his back.  “Besides, if she’s mad at anyone, it’s me.”

 

They arrived at the home and Zoya pulled him inside and looked him over.  Hugging him, she said with a voice harsh with unshed tears, “You worried us, Andrei.  Now go see to your sister.”

 

She released him and he ran to the common room where his sister was staring out the window.  Nina held onto the stuffed poodle, an occasional sniff shaking through her body.  Andrei felt like a heel leaving his sister like this.  He promised his mother he’d look out for her.

 

“Hi, Nina,” he said softly.

 

She turned and wiped her tears away with the back of her hand.  “Andrei?  You’re home!”

 

He knelt before her.  “I’m sorry.  I didn’t mean to scare you.  I was...upset.”

 

“What’s wrong?” she asked, her eyes shifted from Andrei to Victor and Yuuri.

 

Zoya cleared the others out of the room.  Soon it was just the five of them.  Yuri hung back by the wall and watched.  When he tried to leave, Yuuri grabbed his hand and stated in no uncertain terms, “You’re a part of this family and we fight together.”

 

“Yes, sir,” Yuri responded with wide eyes.  Yuuri released him and approached Nina, kneeling down next to her brother.  Victor sat next to her on the window seat.

 

“Andrei found out earlier that we are going to have to fight harder for you both to come home with us,” Victor stated gently.  “It scared him and he ran.”  Nina studied Victor with wide eyes then turned to look at Andrei questioningly.

 

Andrei nodded.  “I thought...it was over.  That...we couldn’t go with Yuuri and Victor.”

 

“What...does it mean?”  She looked from one to the other, her eyes resting on Yuuri’s face.

 

Yuuri smiled his hand taking hers and rubbing his thumb over the fleshy part.  “It means we have to use lawyers and we might have to go to court.  We’re all still fighting in this, okay?”

 

She nodded.  “I know Chichi and Papa want us.  We will wait.”  And to her, it was as simple as that.  She reached for her brother who carried her off to bed.

 

Victor and Yuuri sighed wearily as they turned to the blond.  “You want us to take you to Lilia’s or our place?” Victor offered.

 

Yuri shook his head feeling emotionally wrought himself.  “Just take me home.”

 

Later that night, Yuri sleeping quietly down the hall, Victor and his husband stretched out on the couch together, limbs tangled.  Yuuri murmured, “How good are your attorneys?”

 

“Worth their price and then some,” Victor stated quietly.  His jaw was tight, though.  He worried that this problem was too big for them.

 

* * *

  
  


Boris pulled out the case file for the two children with his brow deepened.  “There has to be a way to work around this.”  As he looked through the papers, records where he and Zoya kept meticulous notes within, his eyes narrowed.  “She’s still alive?”  His eyes narrowed on another name.  He pulled out his cell and made the connection.  “Gavriil, I need to talk to you about Irena.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all...trust me. ;)
> 
> Okay...so next week I'm going to work hard on getting back on schedule with Semicolon. I plan to replot it over the weekend. I may do it today even. 
> 
> I've also got another story in the wings about to launch (watch for it on Wednesday). I miss my baby Victor and I started an AU of my AU All That Glitters over the summer. I think it is time for it to make an appearance. So for those who are Glitters fans, watch for "Glittering Youth" on Wednesdays.
> 
> What I had planned for Lost and Found I believe is suitable for a different story. It didn't work in the original context. So Lost and Found will wait and I'm pulling all of that plot out to put towards another story "Clueless". It will be a while before it launches...perhaps after Glittering Youth.


	55. Chapter 55

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dark clouds only block us from seeing the light. (Part 2 - the cloud break)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much to Magrathea and BluSkates for the edits.

* * *

 

  
  


Yuuri shifted restlessly in bed before pushing up.  Victor roused to his movements.  “Where are you going?”

 

“I need to skate.”  The words were simple but Victor knew their meaning.  Yuuri hadn’t relaxed since they learned of the roadblock, definitely not since Andrei ran off, even though the boy was now safely at the home.  Two days later, Yuuri was worn from his racing thoughts.  Victor sent Yuri back to the main house that day because he knew he would have to keep his focus on Yuuri.

 

“Let me get dressed and come with you.”

 

Yuuri sighed and started to undress.  “I’m sorry.  You need to sleep.”

 

“We can sleep tomorrow if needed.  Let me take care of you, my Yuuri.”  He dressed and when he came out of the room, he smelled coffee.  Yuuri must have put it on while he washed.  The shower did much to help wake him but the coffee would help even more.  It was only at this point he stole a glance at the time on his phone.  Two-thirty.  They didn’t settle down until close to eleven.  He took the first mug and drank it down as Yuuri fussed with his backpack.  “Do you want some of this?”

 

“Pour the rest into the thermos.  We’ll take it with us,” he answered.

 

Victor nodded, doing as requested.  At the door, Victor pulled on his jacket then turned to take charge of Yuuri whose movements had become nervous and jittery.  He zipped the navy Mizuno jacket and straightened Yuuri’s glasses.  Picking the keys up out of the bowl, he nodded towards the door.

 

Traffic was still so late at night and they arrived at the rink in darkness.  “Will Yakov be mad?”

 

“If you came out alone, he might...but I’m with you.  It will be fine,” Victor reassured him.  “No jumps, though.  You’ve got too much going on in your head.”

 

Yuuri nodded.  He stood by as Victor unlocked the front entrance and then waited as Victor secured it behind them.  They went to the nearest rink.  It was small but still bigger than the one in Hasetsu.  Yuuri allowed Victor to lace up his skates, his eyes resting longingly on the ice.  With a tap of his ankle Yuuri switched them out so that Victor could take care of the other.  Once he was laced, Yuuri escaped to the ice not waiting for Victor.

 

The older skater stood next to the barrier watching him for the time being.  Yuuri skated through his warm ups then...settled, skating circular patterns as his eyes stared unfocused at the ice.  After an hour, Victor called him in and made him drink some coffee to warm up.  Yuuri wasn’t finished yet and as soon as Victor let him go, he was back on the ice.

 

Victor followed him this time, skating protective circles around the patterns Yuuri cut in the ice.  Yuuri would look up every so often to meet his eyes, but Victor knew he needed quiet.  Conversation was too much.  He waited.

 

Then Yuuri skated into his arms, his own wrapping around Victor’s waist.  And he felt the shaking of that body realizing the release of tears.  Finally, Yuuri lifted his chin.  “I’m okay,” he murmured.  “Really.  Just that I’m...heartbroken.”

 

“Don’t give up, love.  They want us as much as we want them.  There’s got to be a way.”

  
  


* * *

 

Boris sat at the coffee shop table waiting for his friend.  As the other man approached he grinned, standing and holding out his hand in greeting.  “It’s been a long time, Gavriil.”

 

“So it has.  Are you still belly deep in children?”

 

“And then some.  That’s...what I wanted to talk to you about.  It’s one of your terminal cases.”  Boris offered him a chair and waved over a waitress to get him some coffee.  “Irena Belikova.  She is the mother of two children I’m trying to place.”

 

He took a sip of the bad diner coffee and nodded.  “She gave them up some time ago.  Just before she entered the hospital.  She didn’t want them to know she was dying.”

 

“Perhaps we can do this without reintroducing her to the children.  I’m sure...it will give her a certain amount of peace to know they are in a good home.”

 

Gavriil frowned thoughtfully.  “I will let you speak with her.  I make no promises.  She’s a bit of a willow these days, losing herself in her thoughts.”

 

“That’s all I ask.”

 

* * *

  
  


The drive took them out of the edge of the city and towards an old country estate.  Gavriil explained as they drove, “It’s a sanitarium these days.  State funding is low, however.  Like in everything.  But there are a couple of sponsors so the conditions aren’t too deplorable.  For Irena, it’s a step up from where she was living.”

 

“I remember when she brought the children to us, those desperate eyes in her face, sunk in from depriving herself for the sake of her children.  Nina didn’t understand but Andrei held onto her and soothed her.  It was heartbreaking.”

 

“And you want to reopen those wounds?”

 

“Trust me.  It’s worth it.”

 

They pulled into the drive, the cobbles missing a few stones with age.  Ivy crept up the sides unchecked.  Shadows could be seen from the windows as people peeked through various curtains.  “They don’t get a lot of visitors.  Usually just new people checking in or government officials making an occasional inspection.”

 

Boris thinned his lips and nodded.  They rang the bell and the door soon opened to admit them.  Gavriil spoke to the nurse who clucked her tongue but nodded.  Gavriil offered a half smile.  “We may have to go to her.  Some days she can’t make it down the stairs.”

 

They were soon shown into a small sitting room.  The cloying oversweet smell fell away to some degree.  Boris didn’t realize he was wrinkling his nose.  Gavriil noticed.  “It’s to cover the smell of disease.  This particular sanitarium is clean but the people here...some of the illnesses carry a particular odor.”

 

Boris turned as the door opened and admitted a waiflike girl.  He recognized her though, her blue eyes, her white blond hair now shorn close to her head.  She rubbed the locks as if she knew he noticed.  “It’s easier,” she said quietly.  She stepped further in the room, her eyes studying him, recognition registering in her eyes.  “Why are you here?  Is it my children?”  She glanced over at Gavriil then back to Boris.  “Are they okay?”

 

“Yes, Irena,” Boris said gently.  “They are safe and warm.  However, I do need to talk to you about them.  Would you like to sit down while we discuss a possible future for them?”

 

She shifted uneasily but nodded, taking his outstretched hand and allowing him to lead her to a chair.  “You don’t flinch from touching me.”

 

“I help take care of Nina.  I’ve read quite about about HIV.”

 

“I’m dying.  You know that.  It’s more than just HIV with me.”

 

“I know.  But you are still a person and deserve dignity.”

 

A small but sad smile came unbidden at that acknowledgment.  “Thank you.  You are Gavriil’s friend,  _ da _ ?”

 

Boris nodded.  “I sent Gavriil to you after you turned over the children.  I apologize for losing track of you afterwards.”

 

“It’s fine...you were to take care of my children.  What...is it you need from me?”

 

Boris sighed glancing up at Gavriil who stood by the window before focusing on her.  He took her hand once more.  “I have a couple that want to adopt them.  They are good people...but there is a problem.”

 

“What is it?  If they are good, why is there a problem?” she asked, her eyes narrowing.

 

Boris took a deep breath and let it out with a frown.  “The state turned down the request...because they are gay.”

 

She tilted her head frowning.  “Tell me more about these people.”

 

“They both are figure skaters.  Internationally known.  They have the means to get health care to Nina that she would not otherwise have available.”

 

“Why do they want my children?”

 

“Well, because of Andrei.  Your son met Yuuri when the skater was teaching dance lessons at the center.  He...became attached to him, probably because Yuuri is unusually kind.  When Andrei learned he will be sent to the transition home at the end of the summer, he became determined to talk to Yuuri and lay out his problem.  And Yuuri brought his partner in on it, really, his husband.”   _ Might as well be completely honest at this point. _

 

“You knew the state would not allow this.”

 

“I thought I could find a way around it.  Is this a problem with you?”

 

She waved her hand.  “No, of course not.  I was a prostitute in a building full of people who walked different paths.  They treated me and my children better than most.  You say they are good people.”

 

“Very good people.  I’ve spent time with Yuuri before this came up.  I was able to get to know him as...a friend.”

 

“And they want both of my children, not just my Nina.  Because it is important that they stay together.”

 

Boris nodded.  “They do.  They even...bought a house so that each would have their own room.”

 

She considered these words before asking, “How could I help?  I don’t have a say in what happens to them.”

 

Boris smiled warmly, this was what he was hoping for.  “You do have a say if...I sign them back over to you.  Because then...it can be done by private adoption.”

 

“Private adoption.”  She blinked as she considered the words.  “I...get to decide.”

 

“Yes, Irena.”

 

“Can I...meet these men who want my children?”

 

“If that’s a condition, then yes, I can make it happen.”

 

She tugged at the robe, its tattered and threadbare appearance suddenly more of an issue.  “I...have nothing.”

 

“Don’t worry.  I’m sure I can come up with a dress for you to wear.  Okay?”

 

“I don’t want my children to see me.  Not like this.  They’ve...already let go of me.  It is best.”

 

“We’ll keep it closed.  Do I have your permission to move forward with this?  To contact their attorney.”

 

She nodded, taking a deep breath and letting it out.  “My children will have a home, warm and full of love.  This is what I wanted for them.”

 

“I’ll make the call.  Thank you, Irena, for hearing me out.”

 

* * *

  
  
  


When Boris drove up to meet with Yuuri and Victor, his mind was still awhirl with what was happening.  He couldn’t believe it was so easy.  He worried about it being so easy.  Knocking on the door, he waited.  After a moment, it was opened by a very tired Victor Nikiforov.  “Boris, excuse me.  Come in.  We...are having a rough day.”

 

“Understandable...but perhaps I have something that might turn it around.”

 

Victor tilted his head with interest as he offered Boris a chair.  “Let me get my Yuuri.”  The man disappeared into what Boris assumed was their bedroom.  Victor, normally quite put together, was unshaven, his eyes sunk in from lack of sleep.  When Yuuri came out, equally shadowed eyes even visible with his glasses, Boris felt guilty.  He did this to this couple with his arrogance in thinking he could bypass the system.

 

Yuuri greeted Boris politely and asked if he’d like a cup of tea.  Boris equally politely declined.  The tired Japanese man sat down on the sofa with Victor taking a place next to him.  He saw the protective hand resting on Yuuri’s hip.   _ I hurt them.  I just wanted to get a home for those kids and I hurt them in the process.  Maybe this will ease their pain.  _  “I spoke with the children’s mother.”

 

“She’s alive?” Victor asked with surprise.

 

Boris nodded.  “She’s open to considering a private adoption.  With a quick signature, I can sign the kids back into her care long enough for this to go through.”

 

“Where will they live during the process?” Yuuri asked with concern.

 

“It...won’t be like that.  We’ll meet in your attorneys’ office and as soon as she agrees, I’ll sign the kids over so that she can immediately sign the papers for guardianship.  That...makes it her choice.”

 

“Does she...know about us?” Victor asked hesitantly.

 

Boris nodded.  “She doesn’t have a problem with you being gay.  She just wants to be sure they are in a loving and warm home.”

 

Yuuri turned to look at Victor with wide eyes, hope lit from behind.  Victor squeezed his hand before leaning towards Boris.  “When can we meet with her?”

 

“Is tomorrow too soon?”

 

Victor shook his head, laughing softly, tears of relief at the back of that laugh.  “No, not too soon at all.  Should I call my attorney?”

 

“They’ll call you once we get it set up.”  He stood up and shook their hands.  Pausing, he added, “She doesn’t want them to see her.  She...knows it will be upsetting for them.”

 

“Of course,” Victor said quietly.  He walked the social worker to the door, Yuuri tucked under his arm.  Boris glanced back as he walked down the sidewalk to see Victor’s arm tightening around Yuuri’s waist, the Japanese man’s cheek resting on Victor’s shoulder.

 

* * *

  
  


Victor and Yuuri were set to meet Irena at their lawyers’ office at eleven the next day.  Yuuri shifted uncomfortably as he stood before the closet.  “I don’t think a suit is a good plan even if it  _ is _ your attorney’s, Vitya.”

 

His husband looked back from the rack of clothes frowning.  “What did you have in mind?”

 

“Something that might make their mother more comfortable.  I was thinking...jeans and a nice pullover.”

 

“Something we’d wear with the kids.”

 

“Exactly.  She’s not going to have much and I remember when I offered my coat to Andrei.  He said it was too nice.”

 

Victor dug through and emerged with a pair of slightly faded black jeans, designer of course but still much more casual than the suit he had in hand originally.  Yuuri rolled his eyes and pulled out the less expensive pair of blue jeans with a dark dye and a long sleeved blue and green striped henley.  He turned to see his husband pull on a thin sweater in deep red.  Turning to face his husband, Victor asked uncertainly, “How’s this?”

 

Yuuri sighed, an indulgent smile settling into his expression.  “You’re beautiful as always...but that should do nicely.  Are you ready?”

 

“Just about.”  He disappeared down the hall and returned with a framed photo of the kids.  When Yuuri raised an eyebrow, he said quietly, “If I were their mother, I’d want to know how they looked these days.”  He looked down at the frame, a soft smile on his lips.  “She has nothing but to her, they are everything.”

 

Yuuri looked over his shoulder at the picture.  It was taken at the park, the children playing with the dogs, Nina laughing and a smile on Andrei’s face.  Yuuri remembered that day.  It wasn’t long after Victor’s surgery and they were missing the children...much like how they missed them now.  “I think that’s a perfect choice.”

 

* * *

  
  


Yuuri and Victor’s eyes were drawn to the door as it opened to admit a nervous woman, her short hair covered with a hat but they could see the white blond peeking out from under the edge.  Her green shirtdress was long, hitting mid-calf, buttons going from top to bottom.  A brown belt settled on her hips and they both could tell she was thin, almost waiflike.  The ravages of her illness had not been kind.  Where did Boris find her?

 

She stepped forward and studied them, her blue eyes sharp in spite of her illness.  “You are the men who want my children?”

 

“Yes, madam,” Victor said softly, respectfully.  She’d had a hard life but that didn’t negate the respect the men had for her.  She’d chosen to let her kids go, to let them have the possibility of a better life.  It was a brave choice.  But now they realized there may have been less choice involved.  As the woman approached, Victor took her outstretched hand, the fingers curving over his.  She looked at the connection.  It was human.  It was warm and accepting.  Lifting her eyes, he murmured, “Thank you for meeting with us.  I am Victor Nikiforov and this is my husband, Yuuri.”

 

Yuuri stepped forward and offered a deep bow.  As he stood up, her lips parted uncertainly looking from one to the other.  “I am Irena,” she said before frowning, her eyebrows furrowing.  “Why do you want my children?”

 

Yuuri glanced at Victor before answering, “They...chose us.  I think that is important.  So many people go looking for children.  We weren’t.  We thought we would later, because we were just married.  But...Andrei reached out...and I couldn’t...say no.”

 

She laughed warmly at that thought.  “He’s a hard one to refuse, that one.”  She thinned her lips and looked from one to another.  “You know about my Nina?  She’s sick.  I don’t want her to end up like me.”

 

Victor nodded.  “We are looking at treatments over in Europe.  There’s research that suggests she could go into full remission.  But...even if that didn’t work, we’d continue to fight for her.”

 

“It was hard, you know.  I didn’t...want any of this for my children.  Sometimes...we don’t have a lot of choices in life.”

 

“But you have a choice in this,” Victor stated.  “We’ve...made a place for them.  I know the state says no but...you could say yes.  We could give them a home.”

 

“And you will keep them together?”

 

“That’s very important to us,” Yuuri answered.  “It was the thought of them being separated that first started us on this journey.  We’ve gotten to know them.  When we thought...we couldn’t get them, we were heartbroken.”

 

She put her hand over her heart.  “My heart aches for them every day.  But...I don’t have too much longer.  I...would feel more at peace if I knew they were happy.”

 

“Perhaps…” Victor pulled the photo out of the messenger bag he carried slung over his shoulder.  “Perhaps this will offer you the assurance you need.  It was taken...before we were turned down.  At the park.”

 

She took the photo from him, her hand shaking, her fingers sliding over their image.  They could see her eyes misting.  Sniffing back, she murmured, “They’ve grown so much.  They do look happy.  These...are your dogs?”

 

Victor nodded.  “Cocoa, the darker colored one, is trained for anxiety and PTSD.  She’s really taken up with Nina.  Makkachin...I got her when my own mother passed away.  Andrei seems to have an affinity with her.”

 

She thinned her lips and nodded, handing back the picture.  Victor shook his head.  “No...you should have that even if...you decide otherwise.”

 

She clasped the picture to her chest.  “No, I’ve already decided.  You are good people.  You will take care of my children.  What do I need to do?”  She glanced around looking for Boris and Gavriil.

 

Boris stepped forward.  “I have all of the paperwork arranged inside.  Gavriil is here to serve as your support and advocate.”

 

She nodded.  “Let’s do this so that my children can go home.”

 

Several papers were put before her explained by Victor’s attorneys and confirmed by Gavriil who pointed out where she needed to sign.  Her signature was shaky and uncertain, and Victor remembered Andrei saying she couldn’t read but that education was important to her and meant opportunity.  As if reading his thoughts, she met his eyes.  “Make sure my children go to school.  I don’t want to see them back where I came from.”

 

“We’ll give them every opportunity,” he assured her.  Once she signed the last paper, she nodded to Gavriil who led her out of the room.

 

Boris gathered the documents he needed to release the children and closed out the files.  It was Victor who broke the silence.  “She’s...not going to live much longer, is she?”

 

“She was in a sanitarium, a hospice for those who are steadily declining.  I honestly don’t expect her to live out the year.  I was actually surprised to learn she was still alive.  That’s why I wanted to move quickly on this.”

 

“I want to...it would be right...when she passes, do not bury her in an unmarked grave.”  Turning to his attorney, he gave one more order for the day.  “Make sure she has a good burial...perhaps near my mother.”  Turning back to Boris, he added, “Let us know.  I think...it’s important for the kids to say goodbye.  I think...Andrei needs it.”

 

“I will.”

 

* * *

  
  


Back at their house, Yuuri and Victor worked to clean and set the house back in order.  Their depression was apparent but now the clouds had cleared.  “We’ll take the children to get things for their rooms and to pick out new clothes,” Victor said excitedly.

 

Yuuri chuckled.  “One thing at a time.  We don’t want to overwhelm them.”

 

“Perhaps Yura would like to come.  We should get your things out of his room so he can settle in.  I’ve already talked to Yakov and Lilia and they said that he’d be happier here.  He’s...a lot more lonely than he lets on.”

 

“I know,” Yuuri said softly.  

 

Then everything happened quickly.  The children arrived running into their arms.  Excited Russian came off their tongues too quick for Yuuri to grasp, but he didn’t need a translator to know they were happy.  Yuuri and Victor showed them their rooms and their hearts pinched when Nina looked around wide eyed and asked, “All of this is for me?”

 

“It’s just the beginning, sweetheart,” Yuuri answered, kneeling.  Nina turned and smiled widely, running into his arms.

 

“Thank you, Chichi...Papa….you didn’t give up on us.”  She snuggled up under his chin and Yuuri laughed softly as he held onto her.  Looking up, he spied Andrei propping his elbow casually on Victor’s shoulder.  “Let’s settle you both in for the night.  Tomorrow, we’ll decide how to personalize your space.”

 

As the sun dipped down, Yuuri padded down the hallway.  He peeked into Nina’s room and found his husband sitting at the small table drinking tea with his daughter.  “It’s time for a bath then bed,” he stated, a smile touching his lips.  Victor met his eyes happily.

 

“Can I have bubbles?” she asked.

 

Victor chuckled.  “Is there any other kind?”  Victor followed her to the bathroom where he ran the water and helped her get ready.

 

Yuuri crossed the hall and tapped on the door.  Andrei had on a pair of earbuds listening to music.  He pulled them free and said, “Hey.”

 

“Hey back.  You okay?”

 

He smiled.  “Yeah...it’s just...a lot’s happened.  I needed some quiet time.”

 

Yuuri nodded.  “I get that.  I just wanted to check on you.”

 

He tilted his head thoughtfully then asked, “What do we do about school?”

 

“There is one near here that delivers kids at the rink.  We thought to transfer you both there.  We will officially withdraw you from your other school tomorrow.”

 

“It’s...a lot of work taking us in, isn’t it?”

 

Yuuri shrugged.  “My mother would call it ‘heart’s work’.  It doesn’t feel like work because we love you.”

 

“When...will we meet them?” he asked.

 

“Perhaps this summer.  We don’t want to interrupt your school too much.  We...made a promise.”

 

He narrowed his eyes but nodded.  “So tomorrow, withdrawal.”

 

Yuuri nodded.  “Then we’ll pick up what you need for your rooms and to help you feel more settled.”

 

He glanced around.  “It’s already so much,” he protested.

 

Yuuri shook his head.  “It’s still not you.  Your room should be that if nothing else.”

 

The boy drew his knee to his chest.  “There’s another room.”

 

Yuuri nodded.  “It’s Yura’s room.  When he stays with us, that is.  With him...it’s complicated.”

 

“But...he’s one of us?”

 

“Every bit.”

 

“So...kind of a big brother?”

 

Yuuri grinned and nodded.

 

“I guess...that takes some of the pressure off.”

 

“Feels good?”

 

“We’ll see.  Yura has a bit of a brat mode.”  Andrei winked, though and Yuuri could see that he was teasing.

 

“After we put Nina to bed, Victor and I are going to watch some television if you want to join us.  You don’t have to...I understand if you still need the quiet.”

 

“Thanks...I might.”

 

Half an hour later, Yuuri walked into the living room with a small bowl of popcorn.  “Are you making me watch that Russian soap opera?”

 

“It’s Russia...it’s all soap opera,” Victor protested.

 

A laugh near the hall drew their attention.  Andrei raised an eyebrow.  “He’s not wrong.”

 

They opened up their circle to include the boy who settled on a pillow in the floor between them.  At some point, he realized fingers were carding through his hair and he felt a sense of peace.  “I’m glad I met you that day, Yuuri.”

 

“So am I.”  Yuuri smiled tenderly as his fingers stilled.  He didn’t worry about the names they called him or Victor.  He just wanted them to feel at home, secure and comfortable.  Victor’s hand slid over Yuuri’s shoulder and the younger man slid down resting his head in Victor’s lap.  Andrei rested his head against Yuuri’s folded legs.  Contentment set in as they watched the dramatic scenes flicker across the screen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you like this resolution. I always intended for them to have the kids. Don't worry, I didn't forget Yura. I think he's slated to show up next chapter.
> 
> Also, there is an extra that will be posted tomorrow...Yuuri's birthday. It's set in the future so I didn't want to give too much away before I finalized the kids coming home. So if you haven't subscribed to my name, do so. This will be the start of a series of Lifeline One Shots.
> 
> It was also brought to my attention that I promised some scenes with toys...so I am planning a couple of gratuitous sex scenes that will flash back to earlier in Detroit. One has been hinted at in a previous chapter. Those will also go up in the One Shots.
> 
> So...enjoy...relax...and feel the fluff...because angst will just be slight angsty fluff until the end of this part...and mostly fluffy fluff.


	56. Chapter 56

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All sorts of domestic goodness as they settle in the kiddos. ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you like this chapter. 
> 
> I have some extras about to be thrown into "Lifeline: One Shots". If you haven't checked that out, you missed Yuuri's birthday that went up yesterday. Also, throw your "extra" requests in the comments on that fic because it will take in the outtakes that doesn't quite fit in the story line but still fits the characters. I will not deviate from the characterization, however. I reserve the right not to write on your idea. But if it inspires me, I'll definitely add it to the growing list. The One Shots is for filling in the gaps and grabbing missing scenes. Part 4 will be a big jump into the future...AFTER Yuuri and Victor BOTH retire. It's set in Hasetsu. Now on with this story...

 

* * *

 

 

The next few days were focused on settling the kids in.  Withdrawing them from school, shopping trips, painting, hanging things on the walls.  Yuri was unable to join them right away because he was under the weather.

 

Several _Princess Mononoke_ prints made it up on Nina’s wall, and the dove gray walls went well with the soft pink canopy that hung over the twin bed with fairy lights running down the [ edge ](http://www.sarahgordonhome.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/Laveder-Grove-Girls-Room-e1373313645273-1.jpg) of the soft cloth.  The addition of a soft quilt and a fuzzy blanket finished off the bed.  The floor had a faux fur rug with different fibers creating a cozy effect.  A pink upholstered chair provided a place to curl up with one of the many books that crowded a bookshelf at the foot of the bed, two shelves high, and stuffed full.  When they offered her dolls, she pushed them aside for stuffed animals.  Bunnies, bears, piggies, and kitties fought for space in the corner where a [ tent ](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/10/88/bd/1088bd37395c5a8e231d4a7e1d230c48.jpg) hung from the ceiling to make a reading fort and a quilted poof was settled in for comfortable snuggle time.  Twinkle lights and pillows completed the space.  In another corner sat a [ table ](http://angelicremedies.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/08/belle-kids-table-and-chair-set-73Childs-Table-And-Chairs-New-Design-Modern-2017.jpg) where she could study and play.  She placed her stuffed poodle on the bed and turned to take in the effect.  Tapping her lip, she looked around the room before giving a sharp nod of approval.

 

For Andrei, it was all about music.  They bought him a keyboard against his protests of “too much.”  This became a constant battle.  Then music posters, a laptop for his homework and outfitted for his other interests, blues and grays interrupted with pops of orange for his soft surfaces.  His walls were painted a deep shade of blue.  Snowboards joined skateboards and he promised to show Yuuri how to use them.  Victor snuck in a [ print ](https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS-X4tFEPhkOj1V6-UYquVkbV0PzJU-7WaOMOeLZ_M7cR69k-k1Vg) or [ two ](https://img1.etsystatic.com/159/1/11176273/il_340x270.1220602997_nf0g.jpg) and promised to take Andrei back to the music shop as his interests develop.  Over the silver hair, Andrei rolled his eyes as he met Yuuri’s smile.  It might take a while for Andrei to completely fill his [ space ](https://i.pinimg.com/736x/5c/4d/9e/5c4d9e7d2f1703e4cd68d4f9d06534b6--teenage-boy-rooms-teen-boys.jpg)but it was a start.

  


* * *

  


Yuuri drove over to Lilia’s on Sunday morning.  The weekend had been busy, but the three men made short work of painting and Victor was a pro at shopping once he knew what was wanted.  He found the younger Yuri playing with his cat Potya.

 

“Hey.”

 

Those green eyes looked up to meet his, the sniff from the tail end of his cold still evident.  “Hey.  I thought you were busy.”

 

“Well, we did have to settle the kids but we wanted you to come over.  Think you could come stay a night or two?”

 

Yuri’s eyes narrowed.  “I guess.  If I can bring Potya.”

 

Yuuri laughed.  “Of course.”

 

On the drive home, Yuuri added, “I thought you could...help me move out of _your_ room.”

 

His green eyes widen.  “Really?”

 

Yuuri nodded.  “I hated taking it...but I wanted them so badly.  I hate that you felt...displaced.”

 

Yuri shrugged.  “Don’t be so dramatic.  It’s not like I was really homeless.  I had Yakov and Lilia’s.  I just...you both said I was your family.”

 

“Not was... _are_ .  You _are_ our family.  I know we can’t adopt you for a number of reasons.  I don’t even know if that’s something you would want.  But...Victor and I always said you’d have a home with us.”

 

“Why...can’t you?”

 

“Yuri, you have a grandfather.  He has custody of you and he loves you very much.  We could never disrespect that relationship.  But that doesn’t mean you don’t have a place with us.  So much so that we always thought of that room as Yuri’s room.”

 

They arrived and Yuuri took the animal print suitcase down the hall.  He paused pretending to mess with the handle and nodded to Yuri.  “Go on in.”

 

The kitten opened the door and his eyes widened as Victor and the two kids cried out “Surprise!” and some glitter came through the air.  Yuri looks around in surprise.  [ Animal print ](https://i.pinimg.com/736x/cc/e3/2d/cce32d8011a2f02c3bf42c07b87361c0--leopard-decor-leopard-prints.jpg) , black, and red greeted him in every direction.  A full length [ mirror ](https://media.domu.co.uk/catalog/product/cache/1/image/1000x/9df78eab33525d08d6e5fb8d27136e95/1/0/10-067_1_1_2.jpg) fit for a queen.   [ Desk ](https://i.pinimg.com/736x/7b/19/ca/7b19caaf82b089102548e15ebb251dfa--elegant-makeup-vanity-room.jpg) with room for his laptop and makeup mirror.  The leather [ chair ](https://st.hzcdn.com/simgs/16e19558036117d3_4-7916/armchairs-and-accent-chairs.jpg) and stool from Victor’s old condo Yuri always claimed when he visited.  And not [ one ](https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTQGgqiVaVJhIC_j7Ad89AYp4DULDhbFiUmQLMNZ8KCQS_VfiqXdQ) , but [ two ](http://www.dhresource.com/0x0s/f2-albu-g4-M01-82-DF-rBVaEVevJ7KAWdXlAACrhgeqcxM798.jpg/natural-banana-leaf-cat-scratching-tree-cat.jpg) cat trees.

 

Yuri fanned his long fingers in front of his face, overwhelmed and fighting his tears.  “I...I...can’t believe you did this.”  He then stopped, his eyes focusing on the black frame.  “Is that a feather boa?”

 

“Of course, silly,” Nina giggled.  “Every queen needs a feather boa and a crown.”

 

Victor smirked.  Andrei scruffed her curls.  And Yuri went over to pick up the boa, wrapped it around his shoulders and then placed the crown on his head.

 

“So I can stay?” he asked looking at the two adults.

 

“Yes, Yuri,” Victor answered.  “If that’s what you want, we’ll go help you finish packing your belongings today.  We’ve already cleared it with Yakov and Lilia as well as your Grandpa.”

 

“What about my cat?”

 

“The dogs got along with her when they were together at the big house.  I’m sure it will be fine now,” Yuuri said matter-of-factly.   “Plus, we’ve already made a space for her.”

 

“And you’re sure Lilia is okay with this?”

 

Yuuri and Victor nodded.  Yuuri added pensively, “I think...she could use some quiet time.  Don’t you?”

 

He frowned sadly.  “Is she...going to die?”

 

“Not anytime soon, honey,” Victor murmured as he drew the boy into his arms.  Kissing the top of his blond head, he added quietly, “It’s just going to take a while for her to get her strength back up.”  Victor waved his hand around the room.  “Are you okay with this?  We can change anything.”

 

“I can’t believe you did this.  This is almost exactly as I pictured it.  Yuuri and I were talking about it the other day.”  He swallowed and sniffed.   _Damnit, old man!  You always make me cry these days!_

 

* * *

  
  


At Lilia and Yakov’s, the men went with Yuri up the stairs to help him pack.  Lilia caught Nina’s attention and led her into the kitchen to finish making cookies.  “This was my grandmother’s recipe,” she was saying as they disappeared through the doorway.

 

Andrei shifted uncertainly and turned to follow Victor and Yuuri when he heard a throat clear behind him.  Turning, he found himself face to face with Lidiya.  “Andryusha?  Come here, young man.”  He followed her into another room.  “This was my parents’ estate before Lilia inherited it.  And it’s always my home when I’m between jobs.  Do you know what I do for a living?”

 

Andrei shifted uncertainly.  “You...once played piano.”

 

“Very much so.  I want to hear what you can do.  Will you show me?”  She watched him nod before turning to the baby grand and lifting the protective cover from the keys.  “Do you sight read?”

 

“Yes, Madame Lidiya.”

 

“Let’s start with this.  Have you played [ _Heart and Soul_ ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ibfJsyx6N_U)?”

 

Andrei shook his head slowly.  “No, Madame.”  He watched as she settled the sheet music out.  His first play through the music had mistakes but he recognized them, wrinkling his forehead and making note.

 

“Again,” she commanded when he finished.  He repeated this time with less mistakes.  By the third play through he had it.  “You have a good eye and ear for music.  Do you have a passion for it?”

 

“Yes, Madame.  It just...seemed an impossible dream before.  I thought I needed to chase more practical opportunities.”

 

“And now, you can follow the dream.”

 

“Victor and Yuuri seem to want to support me.  What if I let them down?  I’m such a late starter.”

 

“They have both had those thoughts themselves.  Anyone who goes into the creative fields faces doubts.  However, if it’s your passion, you will find yourself in the music.  Now, try another piece for me.”

 

As she settled the music, his eyes widened.  “[ _Fur Elise_ ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zO_xjzHzHZ0)!”

 

“You are familiar with this, then,” she stated.

 

Andrei nodded and then followed with “Yes, Madame.”

 

“Then play for me.”

 

He studied the music a moment before settling his fingers on the keys.  He closed his eyes for a moment pulling the music back into his thoughts then opening, he allowed his fingers to dance over the keys.  The timing was perfect.  The tone was delightful.  And Madame studied him thoughtfully.

 

When Victor and Yuuri found them, they leaned against the door facing listening.  Lidiya turned, thinning her lips.  “Have you enrolled this boy into school?”

 

“Not yet, Miss Lidiya,” Victor answered.

 

“Then allow me to make a call.  I think I can get him into the arts academy.  It is also close to the rink.”

 

Andrei’s eyes opened wide as he looked back and forth between the adults.  Yuuri could see that he was overwhelmed and offered an encouraging smile.  So much had changed so fast.

 

* * *

  


Later, Andrei and Yuri sat in his room, the older boy helping the younger get familiar with the phone.  “I like Spotify because I can subscribe to it...although, knowing Victor, he has a family subscription.  We’ll just have to talk to him and make the connection.”

 

“I’ve...never had anything like this,” Andrei confessed.  “It all feels...too much.”

 

Yuri pulled his knees to his chest, his eyes traveling over the carefully selected items.  “I didn’t have much when I came to skate with Yakov.  The government paid for my skating equipment, coaching fees, and a small stipend for living expenses, which was handled at the dorm.  I found out later that Victor helped sponsor me into the sport, which allowed me to travel for competitions and training camps.  He never said a word.  However, he did show me how to make money from the sport.  It’s hard though, sometimes.  I remember what it’s like to have nothing.”

 

“I was just there last week.  I don’t know if I’ll ever get used to this.”

 

“You will...and then it will feel normal.”  Yuri got up and walked over to the mirror thoughtfully messing with his hair.  “Andrei...did you know…”  He trailed off, uncertain and feeling oddly vulnerable.

 

“That you have an unusual attachment with animal prints?” the younger teen asked, his eyebrows raised.  Yuri rolled his eyes in response before taking down the feather boa and draping it around his shoulder.  Andrei chose to push in.  “That you’re...gay?  Genderfluid?”

 

Yuri nodded.

 

“I figured it out as we spent time together.  Just watching you skate, you wonder how much of that’s for show.  You’re...subtle.  Especially in your fluidity.  But honestly, I picked up on you being gay right off the bat.  Before my mom had to give me up...well, most of our neighbors were gay, transgender, or other identities.  My mother...she...well, she made money however she could.”

 

Yuri twirled his growing hair around his finger.  “My mom...gave me up, too.  She...disappeared.  Grandpa said that she always seemed only partially nailed to reality.  Victor told me later that she was in and out of hospitals.  When she is taking her meds, she’ll talk to me when I see her.  She works at a boutique.  They always take her back.  She used to model for them and before that, she acted.”

 

“Do you miss her?”

 

He shrugged.  “Sometimes.  I mean, she is still alive.  I can go see her.  I don’t know what it’s like not to even have that option.”

 

“It sucks.  Especially since I know my mom loves me.”

 

“I...think my mom loves me...in her own way.”

 

“But you know Victor and Yuuri love you.”

 

The older teen blushed and nodded.  “Don’t tell them I said so, though.”  His eyes flashed as they narrowed.

 

A call from the down the hall informed them dinner was ready.  As they entered, Yuri’s eyes went wide.  “Katsudon?  Really?”

 

The Japanese Yuuri nodded with a smile.  “It felt like a gold medal win with all of you home finally.  Victor and I wanted to celebrate that.”

 

“Katsudon.  Isn’t that what you call him?”

 

“Yep.  It means pork cutlet bowl and it’s Yuuri’s favorite meal.”  Andrei followed Yuri’s lead to the side of the table.

 

“High in calories, though,” Yuuri added.  “So we save it for celebrations.”

 

Nina crawled in the chair on the other side of Yuri.  She studied him thoughtfully.  “I can’t decide if you’re my uncle or brother.”

 

Yuri laughed.  “Well, according to Victor, he doesn’t know if I’m his kid brother or...something else.”

 

Victor blushed.  “I should not be held accountable for things said under the influence of anesthesia.”

 

“Whatever, old man.”

 

Victor gave a long suffering sigh.  “It’s quite simple, Nina.  He’s our angry kitten.”

 

Yuri hissed in response, which caused the rest of them to laugh.

  


* * *

  
  
  


The next morning, parenting hit them hard as they struggled to keep everyone on schedule.  Yuuri made breakfast while Victor pushed the kids to get dressed and ready for the day.  The younger two had backpacks with school supplies.  Yuri had his skate bag and laptop.  They finally made it out the door and into the SUV.

 

They dropped Yuri off at the rink on the way to the school with Nina asking, “Why doesn’t Yura have to go to school?”

 

“Yuri’s training keeps him busy so he takes his classes online,” Victor patiently explained.

 

Victor dropped Yuuri and Andrei off at the secondary school and he took Nina to the elementary.  School records in hand, he entered the administration office and was welcomed warmly.  They took Nina to her new teacher, Mrs. Solkova, before returning to fill out paperwork.

 

“We are so pleased you decided to enroll your daughter here,” the principal gushed warmly.

 

Victor smiled.  “My partner and I felt this neighborhood was a good option given its closeness to the rink.  However, we don’t know if Nina will struggle in the transition.  I have a list of numbers to call should you catch us both on the ice.”

 

“So, you are her father and Yuuri is her…” The principal prompted.

 

Victor smiled, years of fielding searching questions from the press helped him refine a nose for curiosity and gossip digging.  This woman was a solid educator.  “Nina refers to him as Chichi.  He’s Japanese so it’s a similar familiar name for father in his language.”

 

“We don’t get a lot of same sex parents.  We want to make her transition easy but...some people have a backwards point of view.”  She handed over a few forms of emergency contacts for Victor.

 

“I’m glad you are not of those variety.” He smiled up as he finished filling out the first.

 

“Not at all...and I chose her teacher for that reason as well.  She’s very open minded and will welcome Nina’s unique perspective on life.”

 

“Now, about her health issues…”  He handed back the forms and searched her face for understanding.

 

She smiled warmly, “I’ve already informed her teacher and the others that will work with her to keep gloves on hand in case there are bodily fluids involved.  We’ll be conducting a training to meet her health needs.”

 

“Thank you.  I know some might be afraid, but she’s such a warm and friendly child, I think she’ll be able to bridge the gap.”

 

“I know I’m already charmed by her.”

 

“Sometimes...when she’s sick, it can cause her to be out a number of days.”

 

“We’ve already made note on her file that she’s excused from excessive absences.  Just stay involved so that she doesn’t fall behind.”

 

“We will be very involved, and she has two brothers to help out as well.”

 

“Good.”  She smiled as she assembled the file.  Looking up, she held his eyes.  “It’s rare for someone to take on such a challenge.  I’m glad to see some still have a big heart in this world.”

 

“And I’m glad to see there are some in this country who are open minded.”

 

She snorted then covered her mouth.  “Forgive me.  We sometimes have to hide it, but there are more of us than you realize.  Let us know if there is anything else we can do to support this transition.”

 

“Thank you.”  He stood and shook her hand before leaving to go pick up his husband.

 

* * *

  
  


Yuuri had a more difficult time but Andrei helped him read the documents he couldn’t sort out.  “When my anxiety is high, it makes it even harder,” he murmured quietly.

 

“It’s fine, Yuuri.  I’m just glad you came with me.  Is this really a fine arts school?”

 

“Yes.  Lidiya pulled a few strings to get you in.  Her reputation in the field of music was as good as an audition.  It’s a little closer to the rink because a number of students go from here to the sports complex.  Dance and skating.”

 

“And I can learn music.” Yuuri caught the naked enthusiasm in the boy’s voice.

 

“Exactly.  But don’t limit yourself.  If you want to take dance, take dance.  Painting.  Pottery.  Fiber arts.  Explore.  And they have a number of great classes to prepare you for college as well.”

 

“What foreign language should I take?”

 

“If English is an option, take it.  It’s boring but it’s spoken so many places that it will open doors.  Latin is also a good option because music and dance speak that language.”  Yuuri paused squinting at the letters.

 

Andrei peeked over his shoulder.  “That says _contact information_.  Well, it says it but in a weird way.  They just want to know how to reach you and Victor.”

 

“I’m sorry.  I should be better at this by now.”

 

“It’s okay.  I...mom needed me…” he trailed off uncertainly.

 

Yuuri blinked staring at Andrei.  “Oh, that’s right.  You said your mother didn’t read very well.”

 

Andrei nodded.  “At all.  She didn’t know how.  She said the letters...they mixed up on her.”

 

“Dyslexia,” Yuuri supplied.  “It’s a processing disorder,” Yuuri explained as Andrei gave him a puzzled expression.  “A well-trained reading specialist could have taught her how to get past that and read, but…”

 

“Those aren’t really available around here.  I guess we’ll make the best out of what we’ve got,” he said with a shrug.  “She _was_ smart though.”  His voice suddenly became defensive, almost apologetic.

 

Yuuri squeezed his hand.  “Of course.  Dyslexia is not a statement on intelligence.”

 

Andrei looked over the paper for Yuuri and then nodded.  “It looks complete.”  He walked over to the registration clerk who took his paperwork and smiled towards Yuuri.  Andrei waved him over and whispered, “She wants to know if she can have your autograph.”

 

Yuuri looked up in surprise.  “Oh, I don’t get that a lot here.”  She pulled out a magazine and opened it up to the perfume ads.   _Oh, of course._  He took the sharpie and signed his ad and the legs of Victor’s.

 

Her eyes widened as she looked at those legs.  “Yours?”

 

He nodded.  “I’ll send Victor in next time and he can sign the other.”

 

Her eyes lit up and nodded.  “We’ll take good care of your son.  Thank you.”

 

Yuuri smiled.  If an autograph will smooth the way for his son, so be it.  Turning to his Andrei, he put a hand on his shoulder.  “You know how to reach me if you need me.”

 

“And if I can’t reach either of you, call Yuri or Yakov,” he added.

 

“Good.  There is a bus over to the rink.  If you miss it, call us.”

 

“I will.  Have a good practice.”

 

“Have a good school day.”  Yuuri reluctantly left the boy behind.  The woman behind the counter smiled encouragingly.  Yuuri left the school and found his husband waiting outside.  Frowning, he run to his husband’s arms.  “That was much harder than anticipated.”

 

“Oh?”

 

Yuuri frowned.  “My son had to translate for me.  I...felt a little of what it must have been like for his mother.  And now I’m sad.”

 

“Why are you sad, _lyubov moya_?”

 

“I...don’t know?  He’s there all alone.  I don’t know his teachers.  I can’t thoroughly read the papers I just signed.  What if I signed something I shouldn’t have?”

 

“Schools don’t typically have you sign questionable documents,” Victor pointed out.

 

“He...misses his mother.  He never quite says it but I can hear it.”

 

Victor smiled gently now reaching the root of matters.  “I know...he’s probably been so busy taking care of his sister and being strong, he hasn’t had a chance to mourn.  We’ll make an appointment with Dr. Abramovich.”

 

Yuuri nodded, blinking back his tears.  “I need to skate.”

 

“Of course.”  He held the door open for Yuuri and settled him inside.  The trip to the rink was short.  Yuuri got out and walked ahead down to the rink.  Yuri watched him with wide eyes.

 

“What’s with Katsudon?”

 

“I think school made him feel inadequate.”

 

Yuri nodded with understanding.  “It always makes me feel that way.  That’s one reason I take my classes online.”

  


* * *

  
  


The boys were seated at the kitchen table after Nina went to bed, Yuri with his computer open arguing with Victor about Geometry, Andrei with his textbook open to Algebra listening intently to Yuuri.  The latter looked up when Yuri threw his notebook across the room and jumped up.  “Maybe, old man, math has changed in the twenty something years since you had it.”

 

Victor gave him a patient smile.  “More like eleven.  I graduated at sixteen, not eight.”

 

Yuuri gaped at him.  “How did I not know this?”

 

Victor shrugged.  “Online learning allows you to self pace.  It’s not as big a deal as it sounds.  If Yura would focus, he could finish early, too.”

 

“Maybe I should learn online,” Andrei piped up.

 

Yuuri met Victor’s eyes.  “We...have a promise to keep.”

 

The younger teen narrowed his eyes.  “That’s the second time you said that.”

 

Victor sighed and nodded to Yuuri to continue.  The Japanese man got up and put the tea kettle on.  After a few minutes, he returned with a tray of tea cups steeping.  Yuri leaned over and whispered, “That means it’s serious.  Yuuri making tea before a talk is always serious.”

 

“I can hear you, Yura,” he said with an amused warning.  He handed them each a cup and for a period of time, schoolwork was forgotten.  Yuuri studied his mug as he put his words in order.  “The reason we were able to adopt you is...because your mother allowed it.”

 

Andrei looked from one man to the other blinking rapidly.  “You...saw my mother?”

 

They both nodded.  Victor reached across the table and took his hand.  “She...wanted to know you were both happy.  We took a picture taken at the park that day.  She’s...more at peace now.”

 

He studied the connection between their hands, his lips downturned.  “She’s dying, isn’t she?”

 

Yuuri sighed but then nodded.  “I’m afraid so.  She...didn’t want you to see her like that.”

 

He thinned his lips then swallowed.  His eyes blinked rapidly.  “Mama…”  The words came out in the faintest whisper.

 

“She still thinks about you both,” Victor reassured him.

 

He smiled, sad but still present.  “I know.  She always did.  There was never any doubt.”  He pulled his hand back.  Frowning, he asked, “Did you get a picture?”

 

They shook their head.  “Only her signature on the adoption papers.”

 

He met Yuuri’s eyes.  “Can I see it?”  Yuuri shifted out of his seat and left the room.  He returned a few minutes later from the master bedroom, a bundle of papers in his hand.  He handed it to Andrei.  The boy studied the papers, his eyes skimming the contents stopping every so often to touch her signature.  He finally folded it.  “She wouldn’t be able to read this.”

 

“I know.  She had an advocate with her to explain it.  She...asked us a lot of questions to make sure she was doing the right thing.  She wanted to make sure you were safe.”

 

“And...the promise?”

 

“That you both would go to school...and have a future full of opportunities.”

 

He smiled.  “School was important to Mama.  She didn’t want us to...struggle like her.”  He pulled his knees to his chest and wiped a tear from his finger.  “She’s still alive, though.  At least for the moment.  I hope...I can at least tell her goodbye when she goes.”

 

“We asked them to let us know...we knew you would want to be there,” Victor said softly.  The boy sniffed, then he was around the table and in Victor’s arms.  Victor held onto him, rocking him in his embrace.

 

Yura looked wide eyed.  He’d seen the wince when the boy touched his sore shoulder but Victor gave him an imperceptible shake of the head.  This was more important.  The older teen put a hand on his...brother’s shoulder.  Yuuri sipped his tea and allowed the emotions to settle.  As Andrei slowly let go, he returned and leaned against Yuuri.  It took some time before they returned to Algebra and Geometry.  But they did.  Because they promised.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story keeps growing and growing...in part due to the fact that I want to wrap up their time in St. Petes properly. I also want to make sure the arc with the kids is in order. However, there will be major skips in time. So if you feel like you want to see some things I haven't addressed, throw it into the comments in the "One Shots". If it feels like it fits the character, I'll probably write it. I know some of you have said something about sibling rivalry and Yuri just being Yuri...and that's hinted at here but I'm dealing with big picture items for the most part.
> 
> Next chapter...every day life as they close out the school year. Then we go to Switzerland for the summer. That's right...Switzerland. ;) The summer will be split over three chapters including a two week visit to Hasetsu. (This story keeps growing and growing...I don't know how many chapters it will wrap up but I tend to prefer multiples of 5. Of course, St. Petes is a larger block of time.)
> 
> Thanks so much to my wonderful editors Magrathea and BluSkates! I know I can keep you busy.
> 
> And tomorrow, there WILL be a "Semicolon" chapter. Wednesday, the new story: "Glittering Youth". 
> 
> Thank you for reading!


	57. Chapter 57

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Several short snips of daily life with the skate family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, BluSkates and Magrathea, for your edits.
> 
> Semicolon may post late tomorrow...because I kind of need to write it still. ;)

* * *

 

Recovery came slow as their daily lives continued.  Yuuri continued to practice for the coming Grand Prix, Victor diligently worked towards his shoulder’s recovery, and the kids marched through their studies.

 

Andrei flourished in the arts school, moving forward in learning piano with regular practice and support.  He cried and argued that it was “too much” when Victor had an upright piano delivered a month after they moved in.  However, Lidiya insisted a boy can’t learn the proper posture and technique without a proper piano.  Victor bought the instrument based on her recommendations.  Andrei learned music theory and basics at school, then Victor would pick him up and take him over to the main house where he would spend the afternoon with Lidiya.  Yuuri and Victor would arrive later to gather him up and take him home for dinner, homework, and family time.

 

Nina bounced around in her kindergarten, happy to learn the beginnings of reading and counting and tying her shoes.  Her teacher was very responsive to her students and was quick to let Yuuri and Victor know if she had any concerns.  She rode the bus to the rink with other students and ran to Yuuri with outstretched arms when she arrived.  This was how Yuuri started helping with beginning dance, an extra instructor always welcome.  And she loved to dance, pink leotards, pink tutus, pink tights and slippers, her hair pulled back into a bun with a pink ribbon.  And where his daughter was shades of sweet soft baby pink, Yuuri found his husband was more fuschia and brilliant shades of violet.

 

Yuri was always close by, with the structure provided by his new home, he found he was progressing through his studies much more effectively.  He fought against the rules, but was secretly thankful for them.  Both Victor and Yuuri held him accountable in a way he hadn’t been before.  Yakov and Lilia watched over him, directed his behavior and training, even corrected his manners.  All of these things would make him successful as a skater.  However, with Yuuri and Victor, it was more.  They showed him how to build relationships and work with his emotions.

 

And then Victor was finally cleared to skate, however still banned from jumps and spins.  Yuri knew they planned to introduce the other two kids to the ice but wanted to make it a family affair.  He could already picture Nina taking to it like a duck to water.  Andrei, he wasn’t so sure about.

 

The day arrived, a Saturday designated as a rest day.  Victor and Yuuri loaded them all up.  There had been an outing the previous weekend to fit the younger ones with skates.  While they were there, Yuri had his feet remeasured and it was decided to give it another couple of weeks of growth.  He complained the entire ride home about how he hated the changes his body was going through.  Andrei and Yuuri listened patiently.  Nina...asked questions.  Yuri decided he didn’t want to discuss those changes any more.

 

They arrived at a public rink near their home and Yuri pouted.  “We could just go and use our key,” he pointed out.

 

“It’s good to interact with the public,” Victor pointed out.  They entered and the staff went into a frenzy with three podium skaters coming into the facility.  Victor went up to the counter and let them know they brought their own skates while paying the admissions.

 

“It would be free at our own rink,” Yuri pointed out, already looking over his shoulder.

 

Andrei’s eyes followed Yuri’s, which darted around the rink.  Frowning the boy asked, “What are you looking for?”

 

“Angels,” Yuri answered, which left Andrei even more confused.

 

“Yuri’s Angels,” Victor added in explanation.  “His fans can be very...demanding.”

 

The blond skater nodded.  “Let’s get on the ice.”

 

Once everyone had their skates on, Yuuri helped Nina hobble over to the ice and Andrei leaned on Victor.  “This is harder than it looks,” he muttered under his breath.  Victor just laughed melodically.

 

On the ice, Yuuri showed them both the basics.  Then Andrei went off with Yuri leaving them both behind with Nina.  Victor watched them wistfully and murmured, “They grow up so fast.”  Yuuri rolled his eyes.

 

“Popi, Chichi,” Nina called grabbing at Yuuri’s hands or Victor’s hands as she started to lose control.  Both parents reached out to steady her automatically.

 

“When did I become ‘Popi’?”  Blue eyes met Yuuri’s in confusion as his husband shrugged.

 

“Because I made a song.  For school.  And I wanted them to sound alike.”  Nina’s exasperated explanation held all of the drama of her silver-haired ‘Popi.’  “Now, I want to make a circle.”

 

Yuuri frowned.  “A circle?  Like this?”  Yuuri skated a wide circle around Nina who giggled.

 

“No, silly!  Spin!”

 

“Ooooh, like this,” the Japanese responded as he skated to the center and spun with three transitions.

 

“Show off,” Victor said under his breath although he smiled.  They were drawing a crowd and he knew there were a number of pictures and videos taken and shared.  Yuuri returned to their daughter and took her hands, leading her into a wide circle.  She giggled and grabbed a hold of one hand to try to make herself spin under his arm.  Victor laughed softly, coming up behind her in a squat, scooping her into his arms.  “You’ll learn all of those things in time.  Maybe Chichi will lift you and spin you in the air.”  He leaned forward, and added, “Now don’t kick.  You don’t want to hurt him.”

 

Yuuri laughed and slipped away, building just a little speed before grabbing hold of her lifting her up as she squealed, but concentrating also not to kick.  As he set her back down, he knelt before her.  “Very good job,” he praised.

 

As they drove home, Yuuri scrolled through the number of pictures that tagged them in social media.  “They are speculating on your recovery,” he pointed out to Victor.

 

“I suspected they might.  I had you lift her for a reason.”

 

Yuuri glanced back.  Nina was already asleep.  The boys sat on either side of her discussing a girl Andrei noticed but was too shy to talk to.

 

* * *

  
  


Nina watched Potya from across the room.  She had both dogs eating out of her hand but the cat kept a wary eye on her.  When she approached, Potya would get up and leave.  Nina was frustrated, but she patiently edged closer, watching from the side of her eyes so the cat wouldn’t be as aware of her approach.

 

Yuri could see her movements from across the room over his DS.  He could introduce them and make the connection easier between them, but watching Nina’s determination brought a smile to his lips.

 

As Nina drew near, she kept her back to the cat.  A song came cheerily from her lips as she straightened the skirt of her tunic over her leggings.  She wiggled her fingers to entice the cat down but that seemed to be of no interest.

 

Yuri could see, though, that Potya was watching her with curiosity.  She then pulled out a feather and twisted it back and forth between two fingers.  It was almost too much for the cat to stand.  Then the cat lifted her rear in the air and took a jump landing into Nina’s lap who barely contained her startled scream.  She wrapped her tiny arms around the cat and rubbed her cheek into her thick fur.  “Such a good kitty,” she crooned softly as she petted the cat before teasing her further with the feather.

 

* * *

  
  


Somehow, during the move, not everything went to the right location.  Thus, when Andrei and Yuri were hanging out in Yuri’s room, his eyes went wide when Yuri pulled out a box of high heeled shoes.  “Are those yours?”

 

Yuri laughed.  “I wish.  I bet these belong to Katsudon.  I still find stuff that belongs to him.”

 

“He wears...high heels?”  Andrei’s brows narrowed in confusion.

 

“You didn’t know?”  Then Yuri frowned.  “I guess...he put that part of himself away.  I haven’t even seen him with so much as nail polish or earrings since we moved in.”

 

“Why...would he do that?”

 

“Maybe he thought it’d be weird.  It’s scary to come out the first time.”  Yuri reached into the box and gingerly lifted out a six-inch heel.  “How the hell does he walk in these?”

 

Andrei took out another shoe and frowned.  “Who knows?  Wanna try?”

 

Yuri tried first, sliding his bare feet into the pair then bracing himself on Andrei as he walked across the room.  “Holy shit!  I’ve gained new respect for the man!” he exclaimed.

 

Andrei tried next.  He could not hold his balance and went down in a crash, the heel breaking in the process.  “Oh, no!”

 

The noise drew the attention of the adults and soon Victor and Yuuri’s heads appeared around the door facing.  “What are you boys up to?” Yuuri asked, hand on hip.  Then his eyes widened when he spotted the shoes, the boy trying to stand up with a wince, and the broken heel.  “Sit back down and let me look at that ankle.”  He knelt down and removed the shoe from his foot, studying the damage.  “Victor, we need to ice it.  Looks twisted.  Maybe sprained.”

 

“Got it.  Can you two get him to the sofa?”

 

The Yu(u)ris grabbed hold of Andrei on either side and helped him hobble to the sofa.  As the towel wrapped ice pack was settled onto the swollen ankle, Yuuri looked up to see the most miserable of faces.  “I’m sorry, Yuuri...I...just wanted to try them.  I didn’t mean to…”

 

Yuuri smoothed out his hair tenderly.  “It’s just  a shoe.  Although if you want to learn how to walk in heels, let me show you properly.”

 

“I didn’t...know if you would.  You...never talk about it.”

 

Yuuri sighed and gave him a shy smile, shrugging.  “I didn’t know how you’d react.  And I had to put so much of myself away for the inspections.  I guess...I haven’t been brave enough to pull it back out.”

 

“Is it...like...wearing a costume?”

 

Yuuri shook his head then shrugged.  “Not really.  It’s more...some days I feel more feminine and some days more masculine.  And on those feminine days, I’ll sometimes wear a pair of heels or a dress.  And sometimes it’s more simple than that.  Earrings.  Makeup.  Nail polish.”

 

“You all wear nail polish and makeup.  I thought it was just part of being skaters.”

 

Yuuri smiled sweetly.  “Sometimes it is.  We all have our own makeup bags and we experiment with looks.  That’s also part of the performance aspect of our lives.  But...it’s also something more.”

 

“I...was just curious.  I hope that...isn’t rude.”

 

Yuuri laughed softly.  “No, not at all.  It’s perfectly acceptable to explore.  Sometimes we discover something new about ourselves along the way.”

 

“Did you...always like dresses and stuff?”

 

Yuuri nodded.  “I used to sneak in and try on my sister’s clothes.”

 

“How did she react?”

 

“She told me if I messed it up, she’d kick my ass,” Yuuri answered with a grin.   Andrei laughed before he laid back, his hand on his forehead.  Yuuri’s expression softened.  “Do you want something for the pain?”

 

Andrei nodded and soon he had ibuprofen and a bottle of water in his hands.  As he dozed off, Yuuri drifted off to his room.

 

A very guilty Yuri carried the shoes into Yuuri and Victor’s room.  “I didn’t mean to out you,” he responded uncertainly.

 

Yuuri looked up from the book he was reading and smiled as he reached for Yuri.  “Perhaps it is time.”  And with a shift of his head, Yuri saw the twinkle of tiny diamond earrings.  “I think...I missed this part of myself.  It was like living a half life.”

 

“You know how I felt about you having to put it away,” the other responded, his green eyes flicking to his hands then back up.  “I was...afraid I’d have to as well.”

 

Yuuri slid his hand through the blond’s hair.  “I’d never ask that of you.  I hope you know that.  You be Yura, the Ice Tiger, the beautiful Russian Fairy.  Grab hold of whatever identity fits you.”

 

“I think...I’m a lot like you.  In my own way, but I like...to play with both the girl and the boy side of myself.”  Yuri shifted and stretched out next to the Japanese man, tucking his head under his chin even as his back smoothed against Yuuri.  “I think you kinda knew that.”

 

“I could see that you were searching.  You have your own way of expressing yourself that is uniquely Yuri.  Just like Vitya.  Just like me.”

 

“Victor is flamboyant and hot pink when he goes drag.”

 

Yuuri laughed.  He wasn’t exactly wrong.  “Sometimes,” is what he said.  He fluttered his eyes closed as he remembered an elegant black dress.  Victor rarely wore a dress these days and usually used color, fabric, and makeup to express himself.

 

The blond snuggled in and Yuuri soon heard the even breathing as he continued to stroke his hair.  Victor walked in and smiled at the two cuddled up before slipping in behind Yuuri.  “Hard day?”

 

“Not really...they both were feeling guilty about the shoes and outing me.”

 

Victor brushed his lips against the nape of Yuuri’s neck.  “It was bound to happen living so close together.”  He toyed with the diamond earrings remembering when he gave them to Yuuri for no reason at all.  “I’m glad to see these again.”

 

“Maybe...I’ll let a little of myself out in the day to day.  One day, I’ll pull the dresses out.”

 

“We could shop for some day dresses...something soft and casual.”

 

Yuuri hummed softly.  “Maybe.”

 

* * *

  
  


Lidiya frowned as Andrei stumbled on the keys once more.  “What has gotten into you, Andrei?”

 

The boy shrugged.  “I just...what if I am wasting your time, Madame Lidiya?”

 

“Do you enjoy playing?” she asked.

 

He nodded.  “But the others...at school, that is...they started when they were small.  I just started playing last year.”

 

“And except for a few bad habits, you are catching up nicely.  Your fingers are limber and you have a solid ear for the music.  You pick up on reading the music and understanding the theory with ease.  I don’t understand the problem.”

 

He stared unhappily at the keys.  “I’m...behind.  Although I’m advancing, I’m still...elementary.  Others my age...they are leaving me behind.”

 

“Some of us bloom late due to circumstances.  And some of us just bloom late.  You should talk to Yuuri.  He told me he had a late start into skating and it took him a while to catch up.  But he worked hard and was determined.”  She took a sip of tea before continuing.  “And both of your fathers are happy to provide you with the additional resources you need to succeed.”

 

“I...know.  They bought me an upright piano.”  He looked up with wide eyes.  “It’s...so much!”

 

She chuckled warmly.  “Every thorough exploration in the arts is expensive.  Dancing, skating, painting, and...music.  You have lessons, equipment, supplies.  It’s part of it.   But the arts allow you to touch a part of your soul and awaken it like no other study.”

 

“I just...don’t want to be a burden.”  He stared at his fingers, his shoulders drooped until he felt the cane touching him lightly to remind him to sit up straight.

 

“You are not a burden.  Victor has probably spent more on suits than he has on that piano.  The one I recommended is one I would also recommend for a family with a modest income.  They do not have a modest income.  Their sponsorships and modeling alone pays well.  Very well.  You are not taking away from that.  But by embracing what you love and enjoying it, you are giving them their own happiness.  They love seeing you reach out for opportunities.”

 

“It’s not...practical,” he argued pearing under his blond lashes towards her.

 

She laughed.  “It never is, dear.”

 

“Why did you stop playing publicly?”

 

“I still do...occasionally.”  Her expression became wistful.  “I had a violinist that would accompany me.  We were...more than friends.  She...passed away due to lymphoma.  The music didn’t sound the same afterwards.  I came and stayed with Lilia and Yakov afterwards hoping to get my music back.  But...I grieved for a long time.  I found, though, helping with the younger skaters made me smile again.  So...I became a nanny.  I chose families who had children musically inclined...and they paid me well.”

 

“So...you like teaching me?” he asked, his eyebrows raised.

 

She chuckled hugging him from the side.  “Of course,  Andryusha.  Now play for me!”

 

* * *

  
  


Victor and Yuuri had a strict curfew, especially on school nights.  But what surprised Yuri was how open they were to his budding relationship with Otabek.  They teased him, but Otabek was welcome in their home and came to stay for a week during the late spring while Victor helped him work through his choreography.  Otabek was allowed to stay in his room but they did require the door to remain ajar.

 

Yuri couldn’t help but wonder if the entire family were set to sabotage him.  They were seated on the futon Yuuri provided for Otabek to sleep on leaning against the blond teen’s bed.  They had Otabek’s phone split between earbuds and talked about music, fingers tangling together as they talked about coming skates and performances.

 

The first knock was Victor who didn’t wait to be invited before he entered.  “Hello, boys.  Yuuri has prepared some snacks in the kitchen.  Why don’t you join us?”

 

Yuri huffed but Otabek smiled and nodded, silently accepting the direction of the adults.  As Victor left out ahead of them, Yura leaned in and hissed, “I live here but they don’t control me.”

 

“Don’t be silly, Yura,” he teased, a smile reserved only for him even as he tweaked the blond’s nose.  “You live in their home.  I’m a  _ guest  _ in their home.”

 

Yuri pouted as he followed Otabek out.  However, as he drew closer to the kitchen, the smells became very inviting as well as Nina’s giggles.  As he come into the room, he saw a number of foods laid out.  “Hot pot?”

 

“Shabu-shabu,” Yuuri corrected, his smile in place as he welcomed his guest.  Soon they were all seated around the table, the thinly sliced food ready to dip into the hot broth.  Yuuri demonstrated and soon the others were into the swing.  Nina giggled and Yuri couldn’t help but smile adoringly.

 

“Your sister is cute,” Otabek commented as they walked down the hall after dinner, shooed away by Yuuri and Victor who were handling the dishes.

 

“She’s not my…” Then he stopped and frowned.  Because inside he wanted her to be.  What was it Yuuri said?  Families aren’t always stitched together by legal documents.  Often they were sewn together by love and choice.  He could choose…  He smiled.  “Yeah, Beka, she is.”

 

They fell asleep listening to music, Yuri’s fingers hanging over the edge of the bed to tangle with Otabek’s.

 

The next interruption came the following evening by Andrei, although not in the fashion of Victor.  He was working on a piano piece and it drew Otabek’s attention when he stepped out to get a glass of water.  He was standing in the door of Yuri’s younger brother listening when the boy noticed him and invited him in.  When Yuri found him, they were in depth in conversation about music.  There was nothing else to do but join in and soon they were discussing elements they looked for when it came to skating performance and Andrei was discussing what he was learning from Lidiya...which caused him to shoot far and beyond the school’s program.  Thankfully, the school adjusted to his levels quickly.  Lidiya’s instinct was correct when she gauged his ability.

 

Yuuri tied them up late the next evening in the dance studio while Victor handled Andrei and Nina.  Otabek was surprised at how demanding the Japanese danseur could be, but Yuri seemed used to it.  However, the instructor was quite versatile and helped Otabek work out his style which fed into the choreography with ease providing a stronger performance aspect.  “Thank you, Yuuri,” Otabek expressed softly.  “I normally eschew dance because I struggle with the flexibility aspect.  You’ve given me another vantage and greater appreciation as to how I can use it in my program.”

 

Of course, Nina had the most demanding of interruptions.  The next evening, she pouted as she pushed into their space, “Yura, watch me!”  And she danced.  Followed by dragging them into a tea party.  And then nails were painted.  And Yuri watched Otabek take it in stride.

 

The fifth night was not a school night.  Otabek was given permission to take Yuri out and the curfew was stretched to eleven.  After a debate over safety, which Victor lost thanks to Yuuri, they hopped on the motorcycle Otabek rented and rode into the night, heading towards the beach.  Riding along the drive, the salty air hitting the blond’s face where he had to snuggle closer, the older boy seeking a quiet place, they finally stopped at an overlook.  The city spilled out before them, the lights twinkling in competition with the stars above.

 

They dismounted the bike and walked to the stone wall that separated them from the world below.  Yuri’s breath caught as he felt the other man’s arms slip around him.  “I promised Victor that we’d wait until you were older.”

 

“I’m sixteen!” he protested.

 

Otabek squeezed him closer, murmuring, “Exactly.  We have plenty of time to take it slow.”

 

Yuri frowned.  “That sounds more like Katsudon.”

 

Otabek chuckled.  “He talked with me, too.  I thought Victor would be the scary one.  And trust me, he’s very protective of you.  But honestly, I think Yuuri could cause more damage.  It could be that he talked to me while rapidly slicing through vegetables.”

 

The blond shifted uncertainly in the other man’s embrace.  Having...parents...this was something new.  He blinked.  Although part of him rebelled against the idea, another part of him appreciated that someone cared enough to set those boundaries...and that someone cared enough to respect them.  He leaned into those arms and sighed.  Perhaps...having a family wasn’t so bad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed those little glimpses into their daily life.


	58. Chapter 58

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Summary: Hope...
> 
>  
> 
> Nina goes to Switzerland for treatment for their first month of school break.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much to BluSkates and Magrathea for editing this for me.
> 
>  
> 
> Extensive notes at the end...I linked it so I just put it in text.

* * *

 

 

 

Yuri pouted.  “I should be going with you to Zurich.”

 

“In many ways, I agree with you,” Victor stated patiently.  “However, your grandfather hasn’t been in the best shape and I think it’s important for you to stay close.  Yakov is arranging for you to stay with Katya and her husband Pyotr who will oversee your training.  Mila will be there as well, visiting with her sister who is choreographing one of her programs.”

 

“But you and Yuuri have been handling _my_ choreography this year.”  His green eyes were lifted in appeal.  “I’m part of this family,” he pushed once more.

 

“You _are_ a part of this family.  That’s why we had a family discussion.  Even Nina thinks you should be with your grandfather.”

 

“But Nina...she’s going to be going through so much.”

 

“She will be poked and prodded and cranky.  Her medicine will be regulated.  And hopefully in a month, we’ll have her treatment lined out for the next year.  There has been a lot of research on children going into remission if treatment is started early.  I just hope we are early enough.”

 

“What if...she’s scared?”

 

Victor’s smile was gentle, _you’re more scared for her than she is for herself_.  “Yuuri or I will be nearby.  We can Facetime with you so that you can cheer her up.”

 

“It’s not the same.”

 

“I know...but you need to see your grandfather.”  Victor’s lips thinned in a manner Yuri was learning meant there would be no further argument.  He sighed, huffed even, and flounced down the hall to finish packing.  He’d go stay with Yakov until he flew to Moscow with Mila to meet Katya and Pyotr.

 

* * *

  


Victor returned to his room and resumed packing.  He looked up to see the Skype call was still connected with his friend.  “Sorry, Chris.  He’s not happy about being left behind.”

 

“When is the angry _chaton_ ever happy?” he teased.

 

“More so of late.  He’s really close to Nina and has taken the big brother role seriously.”

 

“That’s good to hear.  Now, my Grandmaman is most insistent that you stay with her.  She says a month is too long to be in a hotel.”

 

“Isn’t it crowded with you and Phichit?”

 

Chris laughed.  “We’re in and out.  The guest house is all yours.  We will stay in the spare room...and attempt keep it down for Grandmaman's sake.”

 

“Such sacrifice!” Victor teased.

 

Chris rolled his eyes.  “It’s for the kids, not for you.  We have embraced the idea of being indulgent uncles.”

 

Victor chuckled.  “Does that extend to Yura?”

 

“ _Oui_!  Of course!”

 

“I’m going to disconnect.  We’ll see you soon.  Thank your Grandmaman for her hospitality.”

 

Victor closed the final suitcase.  A month in Zurich meant a month away from home...but the doctor came highly recommended, a pediatric specialist in HIV research.  The protocols, along with the antiretroviral treatment, could lead to remission for their Nina.  Yuuri could practice with Phichit between treatments and Victor could focus on Nina.  Andrei would be by his side the entire time.

 

* * *

  


Victor and Yuuri felt worn as they dragged their travel-weary kids off the plane.  Andrei’s face was long and he frowned but he pushed through like a trooper.  Nina was cranky and on the edge of a meltdown.  Victor took Andrei with him to gather their luggage.  Yuuri focused his attention on Nina, Cocoa lying at her feet patiently.  She clutched the stuffed Makkachin and tears started streaming.  “But...I want...the real Makkachin,” she sputtered.

 

“I know, sweetheart,” he acknowledged, ignoring the stares from other travelers.  “Makkachin doesn’t travel as well.  She’s quite old for a dog.  But Madame Lidiya and Madame Lilia both promised to take good care of her.”  Yuuri ran his hands up and down her arms to get her to relax.  “Why don’t you sit with me?”  He sat cross-legged on the floor and invited her into his lap.

 

She moved into his arms and rested her head on Yuuri’s shoulder.  “Where’s Papa?”

 

“He went with Andrei to gather our things.  They’ll be back soon so we are going to wait here,” Yuuri explained patiently.

 

She cuddled into Yuuri hanging onto him.  “I want Yura,” she pushed, and Yuuri didn’t need to look at her to know a full on pout was in place.

 

He reminded her gently, “Remember we talked as a family.  Yura needs to be with his Grandpa right now.”

 

She sighed heavily, clinging to Yuuri.  Her father began rocking gently, humming softly as he rested his cheek against her head.  He thought she had dozed off when she asked, “What song is that?”

 

“It’s one of the songs I am choreographing this season with Papa.  [ For the Dancing and the Dreaming ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vCOe4x-LXcE).  It’s playful.”  She snuggled into his space as a flight attendant knelt down to ask if they needed some help.

 

“I’m waiting on my husband and son,” he explained.  “Our daughter is feeling the effects of travel.”

 

“We have a room to help reduce the stimuli.  I can show you.”

 

Yuuri smiled appreciatively as he nodded, standing, with his daughter still wrapped up in his arm.  She was still a very light, elfin creature.  And as the three of them, father, daughter, and dog, entered the room, they realized they were alone.  He pulled out his phone and turned on music.  [ Studio Ghibli ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7LEmer7wwHI)seemed the best choice at this point.  He loved watching her dance.  He loved dancing with her.  Yuuri guided her through the basic ballet steps and they were so caught up in their movements, they did not realize they drew a crowd that watched them in the window until the spun around.  They froze.

 

On the other side, they spotted Victor who watched with unguarded adoration...and Andrei who gave a good imitation of Yura with his eyeroll.  Yuuri leaned down to murmure to Nina.  “We’ve been caught.  What do you think we should do?”

 

She screwed up her lips thoughtfully.  “It’s time to be cute, Chichi.  They can’t get mad if you’re cute.”

 

She was far too smart for a five-year-old...well, six come August.

 

Yuuri took her hand in his and whistled for Cocoa.  Scooping up her lead, he went to the door.  Victor was waiting.  Yuuri leaned into his space and murmured, “We seem to have caused a scene.”

 

“Only the best of scenes,” Victor assured him.  “I’m sure it lightened the hearts of several weary travelers.”

 

* * *

  


Chris met them in passenger pick up.  Yuuri’s eyes widened and Andrei let out a low whistle.  Victor laughed.  “Elena let you out in the Eldorado?”  The pink [ 1959 Cadillac Eldorado ](https://www.supercars.net/blog/wp-content/uploads/2016/03/1959_Cadillac_EldoradoBiarritz1.jpg) was a car Victor offered to buy on several different visits to Switzerland.

 

“What can I say?  You’ve always been her favorite,” Chris quipped back.  “She’s excited to meet your family, though.”

 

Nina hid behind Yuuri and peeked around his leg.  Chris winked and she dipped back behind her Chichi.  “Oh, _ma petite_ , come out and let me meet you,” he teased even as he joined Andrei in putting the luggage into the trunk.  “You packed light, Vitya,” he commented.

 

“Yuuri limited us to one bag each plus our skate gear.  And I wasn’t allowed to use my largest suitcase.”

 

Chris chuckled.  “You can always raid my closet if needed, darling,” he teased.  Yuuri corralled the kids into the back seat, Andrei behind Chris, Nina in the middle.  Yuuri took a seat behind Victor who sat up front with Chris.

 

* * *

  


At the sprawling château, the family was greeted by Phichit and Chris’ Grandmaman Elena.  “Such a lovely family,” she exuded as she hugged Victor.  “You did good, my boy.”

 

“Thank you, Grandmaman,” he responded returning her embrace before guiding her carefully towards the others.

 

She frowned swatting at him.  “I’m much stronger than I look!” she declared.

 

Victor laughed.  “My apologies, dearest.  Chris told me you had a rough bout with the flu recently.”

 

“I’m quite recovered,” she spouted before turning towards Victor’s family.  “I am Elena but please call me Grandmaman.  Any family of Vitya’s is family to me.”

 

Victor smiled warmly, having been adopted by Chris’ family a long time ago.  “Grandmaman, this is my husband Yuuri,” he began.

 

Yuuri took her hand and smiled warmly.  “Thank you for your hospitality.  A month is a long time for guests and we greatly appreciate that you opened your house up to us.”

 

She smiled at his hold.  “You are a good boy.  Vitya?  How did you end up with such a good boy?  I know you are a rapscallion.”  Victor chuckled from behind her.  Turning back to Yuuri, she added, “Your charms are much more subtle than your husband’s and I suspect much more devastating.”  She released his hand with a wink.

 

Yuuri’s cheeks dusted pink even as he offered a shy smile.  “Perhaps,” he offered quietly.

 

Victor guided Andrei forward.  “This is our son Andrei.”

 

Andrei stepped towards her and took her hand.  It was frail and bony.  Andrei studied it a moment his lips working through his words before he said uncertainly in heavily accented English, “Thank you for...receiving us.  My English is new.”

 

“Don’t worry, my dear.  We’ll take good care of you,” she promised warmly.  Victor translated quietly and Andrei gave her a shy smile in response.  She turned to Victor and asked, “Where is the other one?  The one they call the kitten...or is it tiger?”

 

“Yura was unable to come.  He is visiting his own grandfather who is in the hospital,” Victor explained softly.  She nodded with understanding.  Victor then knelt down next to his daughter.  “This lovely little imp is our daughter Nina.”

 

Nina stepped forward to offer a dramatic curtsy as she said in carefully accented English, “I’m pleased to meet you,” a phrase she practiced over and over the last two days.

 

“Oh, Vitya!  Of course she is just like you!”  Elena turned to Nina and took her hand.  “I think we will be great friends,” she promised.

 

Nina smiled as she looked towards her father who explained what was said.  Turning back, she widened her smile and gave a sharp nod.

 

Stepping back, Elena turned towards her grandson and his boyfriend.  “Chris? Phichit?  Show our guests to the cottage so they can settle in and rest before dinner.”  And with that, she withdrew.

 

Phichit caught Nina’s other hand in his even as she clutched Yuuri’s with the first.  “I’m your uncle Phichit, your father’s best friend.  I’m so glad you are here.”

 

She looked up at Yuuri who repeated the words in careful Russian substituting Chichi for father.  She nodded her understanding before turning back to Phichit.  “ _Spasibo_ ,” then she frowned looking at Yuuri who mouthed the words “thank you” which she promptly repeated.

 

Turning back to Yuuri, he added, “I wish the circumstances were better.”

 

“We hope the doctor will provide better treatment options.  So we are choosing to be positive,” Yuuri answered quietly.  He stifled a yawn before apologizing.  “I guess the travel has caught up to me.”

 

Phichit giggled.  “You always needed a nap after flying.  Come on.  Let’s get you to your home for the next month.”

 

“We appreciate you both giving this up for us.”

 

“We thought it would be easier for you since you had a family to look after,” Phichit replied.

 

Beside Andrei, Victor walked with Chris speaking in a mixture of mostly Russian and a little English.  “So what are you expecting for the outcome?” Chris prompted, nodding towards Nina.

 

“We hope eventually remission.  But we are seeking the best quality of life we can provide.”

 

Andrei murmured, “My sister has been fighting as long as I can remember.  She never gives up and always tries to smile.”

 

Nina was listening and piped up, “I don’t like needles.”

 

Chris turned to her with a shocked expression.  “You, too?”

 

“They’re horrible!” she pouted.

 

“I completely agree.”  His expression held profound sincerity.

 

Andrei smiled as he watched his dad’s friend interact with his sister.  He leaned over and whispered into Victor’s ear, “I like your friends.”

 

“Thank you.  I like them, too,” Victor confided.

 

Inside the cottage were two rooms for sleeping, along with a bathroom, and a communal space that included a seating area in front of a fireplace, a small kitchen and a table with chairs.  Technology was kept to a minimum.  As Yuuri surveyed the surroundings, he turned to Phichit and commented, “It must kill you here.”

 

Phichit laughed.  “The main house’s wifi reaches the cottage.  We put the password on the desk in your room.  And really, what more do you need?  I have my phone, laptop, camera equipment, and printer.  Chris uses my printer because it’s better than his, his laptop and phone.  We do quite nicely.”

 

“I guess that’s no different than dorm life.”

 

“Except I get the benefits that come with sleeping with my roommate,” Phichit pointed out.

 

Yuuri laughed.  “I guess you have a point, there.”

 

Victor and Chris saw to the luggage as Yuuri settled the kids.  Cocoa curled up with Nina as she quickly lost her battle with sleep.  Andrei scrolled through his phone and Yuuri knew he was trading messages with Yuri.  Rejoining the adults, Chris and Phichit took their leave so the other two could rest.  Yuuri soon found himself wrapped in a handmade quilt that smelled faintly of gingerbread and his clingy husband’s scent of cloves.  Sleep overtook him quickly.

 

* * *

  
  


The family sat in the consultation room with Dr. Meier at the hospital in Zurich.  “I’m going to need a number of labs to update her numbers but I’ve received her records from Russia and they’ve been translated.  She’s had some form of antiviral treatment since she was diagnosed at age one.  It looks like she’s been in some institutional health care.”

 

“Her mother gave her up for adoption a little past her third birthday,” Victor provided.  “She couldn’t take care of her with her own failing health.”

 

The doctor made notes.  “So her mother was also HIV positive.”

 

“I believe she was more advanced when she received a diagnosis,” Victor stated quietly glancing over at Andrei who couldn’t understand him but Victor still felt self-conscious.

 

The doctor nodded but noticed the atmosphere change.  “We are here to gather a complete history in order to provide the best treatment for Nina,” he explained.  “There is no judgment here.”

 

Victor smiled and nodded.  “Thank you.  Our son, he shares the same mother and has been with her since birth if you need me to translate any questions towards him.”

 

“Good.  Her history is unclear between the age of one and two.  I know she was on antivirals but I couldn’t tell anything about the consistency.”

 

Victor turned to Andrei and repeated the doctor’s words.  Andrei considered his words.  “I was pretty young and I know my mother would do the best she could,” he began.  “She showed me how to see to my sister’s medicine.  So I followed the directions from the doctor at the outreach clinic.  It...was not a clean hospital like this.  But it was what we had.”  Andrei looked at Victor with a helpless expression but his father nodded encouragingly before relaying the information.

 

The doctor made further notes on his chart as he asked questions, Victor and Yuuri deferring to Andrei when they couldn’t answer.  Andrei at some point leaned in and asked, “What if I mess up?  I don’t want Nina to get hurt.”

 

The doctor picked up on the concern and asked what was wrong and Victor explained.  He turned to the boy and held his eyes encouragingly.  “There are always errors.  This gives us the best picture for moving forward.  Your answers help.”

 

After Victor translated, the boy breathed a sigh of relief.  Yuuri wrapped a reassuring arm around his shoulder and gave him a squeeze.

 

They left the office with a series of appointments for tests.  Nina fell asleep in Yuuri’s lap as they waited for the cab at a nearby bus stop.

 

* * *

  


Evening dinner was always a festive event in Elena’s home.  She loved entertaining and having guests stay with her provided endless delight.  One evening, she arranged a small garden party at Chris’ behest.  Victor leaned in and suggested Chris was up to something.  Yuuri laughed.  “When is he not?”  Fair point.

 

As Nina chased fireflies near the fishpond under the watchful eye of her brother, Yuuri’s eyes became misty as he watched Chris drop down on one knee before Phichit.

 

“I know you had your doubts about me,” he began.

 

Phichit shook his head.  “No, all my doubts were in me,” he protested.

 

Chris kissed both of his boyfriend’s hands.  “I ask that you put your trust in me now...and always.  I ask that you walk through life’s journeys with me, that we share our ups and downs, that we make a life together.  Phichit, will you make me the happiest man on earth and be my husband?”

 

Phichit sniffed, his fingers going up to wipe away his tears.  “Now there’ve you gone and made my eyeliner run!”  He put his hand back into Chris’ hands and held his eyes for the longest of moments.  “I was so all over the place this last year.  Are you sure you want me?”

 

“There’s no one else who has made me want to settle down.  I do want you.”

 

Phichit smiled softly, his hand pulling free and tracked down Chris’ cheek catching the tear as it fell softly.  “There’s no one else I want to spend my life with, either.  Thank you for being patient with me and putting up with the hell I dragged you through.”

 

“It was worth it to come out to the other side.”  He held onto Phichit’s hands once more, his eyes imploring.

 

Phichit giggled, leaning down to kiss him before murmuring, “That was a yes, darling.”

 

Chris’ eyes widened in surprise.  “It was a yes,” he repeated.  Then he turned to the others.  “It was a yes!”

 

They cheered happily, Andrei and Nina joining them as the clapped.  Ice cream was brought out along with coffee to close out the evening and Chris took Phichit to the side to slide a ring on his finger.

 

Phichit turned to Yuuri and winked, “See there?  He put a ring on it!”

 

“Why does that sound dirty when you say that?” Yuuri teased.

 

Chris laughed.  “Because he’s my man!”

 

* * *

  


NOTES:  

 

First of all, the children’s English is limited and even if I’m not saying it, Yuuri or Victor is translating in the background.  Chris has a decent basis of Russian language due to his long term friendship with Victor therefor he can go back and forth between the languages.  He also speaks French, Italian, German, and English.  Phichit speaks English, Thai, and some Japanese.  Yuuri at this point has Japanese, English, Russian, and some Thai.  Victor speaks Russian, French, and English and is learning Japanese from Yuuri.

 

Now onto the research.  I’m looking over several very official sites and not so official sites with regards to Nina’s treatment.  What I’m seeing is that children do find remission especially if treatment starts early.  There is major research taking place in Switzerland with regards to AIDS and pediatrics.  Nina has been on some outdated antiviral treatments while in Russia since she and her mother has been diagnosed.  However, in Switzerland, she will be brought up to date.  The old treatments, however, will provide the baseline of early treatment for Nina and will lead to eventual remission.  I’m including **SOME** of the links I’ve looked at for those of us who are research junkies.

 

[ HIV Treatment at St. Judes ](https://www.stjude.org/treatment/disease/infectious-diseases/hiv.html)  - Included in case you are looking at end of the year giving...plus, I was curious.

 

[ WHO | Publications:  Treatment of Children Living with HIV ](http://www.who.int/hiv/pub/paediatric/en/)

 

[ Swiss HIV Cohort Study ](http://www.shcs.ch/)

 

[ Risk of HIV transmission from patients on antiretroviral therapy: A position statement from the Public Health Agency of Sweden and the Swedish Reference Group for Antiviral Therapy ](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4196576/)

 

[ Medication Adherence in Children and Adolescents with HIV Infection: Associations with Behavioral Impairment ](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3101948/)

 

[ Antiretroviral treatment in HIV-1 infected pediatric patients: focus on efavirenz ](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4412603/)

 

[ HIV Undetectable Does Equal Uninfectious:  The Swiss Statement and the Vindication of Pietro Vernazza ](http://www.thebodypro.com/content/78550/hiv-undetectable-does-equal-uninfectious-the-swiss.html)

 

[ Antiviral Therapy of HIV Infection in Infants and Children:  Recommendations for a Public Health Approach (2006 Revision ](http://www.who.int/hiv/pub/guidelines/paediatric020907.pdf?ua=1))


	59. Chapter 59

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuri in Moscow as he stays with Katya and Pyotr. Mila is along for the ride to visit her sister Katya. Wrapping up in Switzerland.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoy the bits of loveliness I'm sharing with you. I do not have a Semicolon ready for tomorrow but I'll post a chapter of Glittering Youth instead. I hope to have a Semicolon sometime this weekend (and a couple of chapters ready for next week). 
> 
> Thank you to BluSkates and Magrathea for editing for me. Hope to see some more Memories and Days soon! (If you haven't read their works, hop on over and check them out).
> 
> A few minor notes at the end...enjoy!

* * *

 

 

The flight to Moscow was short but Mila kept babbling on about a hockey player she was seeing which only added to Yuri’s annoyance at being separated from his family.  He wanted to be with Victor and Yuuri.  But he also wanted to be with his Grandpa.  H e had to decide.  He knew everyone was right but part of him felt left out.   _ And Mila was still talking about that hockey player.  What was his name?  Greigg?  Is he one of the asshats at the dorm? _

 

“Where did you meet this guy, anyway?” Yuri asked and immediately regretted it.

 

Mila grinned widely.  “He was at the rink and we took a break at the same time then we started taking breaks at the same time on purpose until he asked me out.”

 

“He isn’t like Mikhail, is he?”   _ Why can’t I just shut up? _  Yuri’s jaw tightened.

 

“Not every hockey player is an asshole,” she protested and as Yuri leveled his gaze at her, she added.  “Well, most of them it seems...sometimes.  But put a pair of figure skates on them and they fall flat on their faces.”

 

Yuri smirked at that.   _ Well, that was true.  Toe picks and hockey players don’t mix. _

 

They disembarked and as they claimed their luggage,  found Katya and Pyotr waiting with wide smiles.  Mila dropped the handle of her suitcase which Yuri scrambled to grab hold of as she ran into her sister’s arms.  Cries of  _ I missed you _ ’s filled the air between the two as Pyotr came to his side and took Mila’s suitcase.

 

* * *

  
  


Katya and Pyotr’s apartment wasn’t bad.  It had that university dorm feel to it but there were two guest rooms.  Or, looking at Katya from this angle, perhaps not guest rooms.  _  Is she pregnant?  That didn’t take long.  _ _ They were only married early spring. _

 

Yuri’s suspicions were confirmed at dinner when Mila exudes excitedly about becoming an aunt.  “Well, Pyotr is coaching and I’m attending university,” Katya stated with a shrug.  “Not exactly planned but we are both excited.”  She rubbed her hand over her tummy as her expression softened.

 

Mila laughed excitedly.  “So when is she due?”

 

“Don’t get ahead of yourself.  We have chosen not to know the sex of our child.   _ They  _ are due in August.”  Katya watched two teenagers do the quick math and shook her head in amusement.  “Babies happen with or without wedding bells.”

 

Pyotr wrapped his arms around her waist from behind and smiled warmly.  “We are happy just the same.  That’s why we rushed through the wedding plans, though.  Katya didn’t want to be showing.”

 

“I’m glad you fit it around our skating schedule,” Mila responded contemplatively.

 

Katya laughed warmly.  “I need to see my sister skate!  You are going to be a game changer.  How are your triples coming?”

 

“Victor has really helped me to become a ‘jump monster’,” she responded excitedly.  “I love how he’s stepped up to help coach.  And Yuuri, too.”

 

Katya smiled softly.  Taking a sip of her tea, she asked, “How is Madame Lilia?”

 

Both teens looked troubled.  “She doesn’t really talk about it,” Mila answered.

 

“She’s tired a lot.  Yuuri’s pretty much taken over running the studio because she has to rest,” Yura responded.  “He’s good, though.  I can tell he’s done it before.  He’s got it streamlined.  There is one always kept free for last minute work throughs and the rest of them are scheduled out.  And it’s open studio from eleven to one in case someone wants to work through something during their lunch break.  When he’s not skating, he’s in the studio and will help any of us who need it.  And he works with an after school program that brings kids by for dance and skating.  Victor works with half on the ice while Yuuri’s with the other half dancing.”

 

“It seems like staying with Victor and Yuuri has worked out for you,” Pyotr observed.  “Tell me about these kids they’ve adopted.”

 

“Well, Andrei is into music and plays piano.  He can get quiet, like Yuuri, and I think he gets into his head.  Sometimes Yuuri has us keep it quiet to reduce stimuli.  Nina is all energy...except when she’s sick.  Then she wants someone to hold her.”  Yuri was quiet as he considered his family.  “I know I need to be here for Grandpa but...it’s hard not being there for Nina.  Sometimes she has bad dreams.  She...thinks the tiger can chase them away.”

 

Mila smirked and Katya was amused.  The older sister asked, “Did it work?”

 

The blond looked down at his hands and shrugged.  “Maybe?”

 

“It sounds like we found our back up babysitter, Pyotr.”

 

Pyotr rolled his eyes.  “Like we can afford you!”

 

* * *

  
  


Yuri walked the echoing halls of the hospital to where his grandfather was staying.  Peering through the window, he frowned.  The old man looked frail.  The boy wasn’t used to seeing weakness in the old man.  Maybe his bad back but this…

 

He looked up when he felt a firm hand on his shoulder to see Pyotr.  He would have prefered the old man or Katsudon.  They would understand that he was scared without him having to say it.  Then again, Pyotr didn’t seem to be pushing him.  Just waiting for him to make the next move.

 

Yuri opened the door slowly, the squeak of the hinge causing his grandfather to jerk in his sleep and Yuri to freeze.  He tiptoed to Nikolai’s side.  Standing close, he could hear the shallow breaths.  Glancing at the window, he could see Pyotr talking with a man in a white coat.  He moved back to the door and slipped out.

 

The doctor turned and asked, “Are you Yuri Plisetsky?”

 

The boy nodded solemnly.  “How is my Grandpa?”

 

The physician frowned.  “You are aware of his COPD.”  The physician watched his response and as Yuri nodded, he continued.  “One of the complications is pneumonia.  This is what we are dealing with right now and it makes the film cloudy.  Once it clears up, we want to take another look.”

 

“What are you thinking?”

 

“I don’t like to put unconfirmed ideas out there.  Let’s just say he’s been in an out of the hospital quite a bit this year and we are going to push him to have more tests.”

 

Yuri nodded.  His grandfather was stubborn.  If he didn’t know about it, then he didn’t have it.  But both of his brothers and his sister had already passed on due to lung cancer.  It was one reason Yuri’s grandfather had threatened to kick his ass if he ever touched tobacco products.  Being an athlete, it wasn’t even a consideration.

 

The blonde nodded grimly and returned to the window, watching the old man breath in and out with the oxygen machine, remembering Nina and how she hated to have the tube in her nose and needles in her arm.

 

* * *

  
  


In a very different hospital across the ocean, Nina vibrantly chatted with the nurses charming her way through the staff.  One of the nurses turned to Victor and asked, “Are you sure she’s not your biological daughter?”

 

Victor laughed delightedly.  “No, but I like that people think that.”

 

The nurse’s expression grew wistful.  “She certainly doesn’t let any of this slow her down.”

 

“When she’s sick, she’s very sick.  She makes the most of the rest of her time.”  His expression softened as he watched her fuss with the stuffed animals as they connected her to the tubes.  She looked for him and he left the nurse to go to her side, taking her free hand in his.  “How is my brave girl doing?”

 

“I want my Chichi,” she pouted.  “And Dyusha and Yura and...Cocoa...and Makka…”

 

“Chichi is on his way.  Along with Chris and Phichit.”

 

She sniffed but nodded, her cheerful bloom leaving her cheeks as they began to pull the bloodwork.  “Dyusha?”

 

“Yes, Andrei is on his way as well.”

 

Victor went ahead because of his skill with the language while Yuuri was held up at intake.  Chris stayed by his side to explain the paperwork and interpret.  The study would make other treatments available to their daughter but it required quite a bit of paperwork and permissions.  He looked up as he heard the elevator doors open and spotted his husband coming off the elevator.  Yuuri cut a direct path towards them.

 

“Nina,” the Japanese man murmured in his soft, soothing voice as she reached for him.  “Hold still, sweetheart.  The sooner they start, the sooner they finish.”

 

“I hate needles,” she pouted.

 

“I know.  I have to have blood drawn quite often.  Why don’t we do _ Itsy Bitsy Spider? _ ”  Yuuri then busied her with various rhymes and songs allowing the technician to do his work.  As the lab tech wrapped up his equipment, Yuuri tweaked her nose.  “There.  Now that wasn’t so bad, was it?”

 

She shook her head slowly.  Turning, she looked through the window and could see her brother and her fathers’ friends.  She waved at them and they offered her waves and smiles.  Only one was allowed in the room at a time.  Victor had stepped out as Yuuri moved into the room.

 

The nurse came up and knelt down to her level.  “Do you think you can go to the bathroom now?”

 

She twisted her lips and nodded.  “Maybe.  I can try.”

 

“There is a container in toilet to catch it, okay?”

 

She nodded.  “I’ve done this before,” she stated with the implication of being a pro.  She hopped down as she reinforced the Disney bandaid and skipped to the bathroom.  She poked her head back out and demanded, “Watch my puppy.”

 

Yuuri grinned as he picked up the stuffed poodle and hugged it to his chest.  Satisfied, she disappeared into the room to take care of business.

 

After the urine specimen was gathered, they were given an appointment for a chest x-ray.  In the doctor’s consult, Nina played in the corner with Andrei while the physician Dr. Meier explained what they will expect.  “We only do that once a year.  The labs we require will be written on a schedule and ordered through your local hospital.  We will need a short in-person visit around the first of the year, and then she’d come back here again next summer to discuss how she’s progressing and to decide if a different treatment protocol is needed.  If any irregularities occur during her other tests, we’ll contact you immediately.”

 

“And for now?” Yuuri asked.

 

“We have three different treatments and we are running the tests to see which is the best option for her.  We typically use a three drug combination that includes either a boosted protease inhibitor, non-nucleoside reverse transcriptase inhibitor, or integrase strand inhibitor plus a dual-nucleoside/nucleotide reverse transcriptase inhibitor.  That’s a lot of technical words and we’ll include that in your patient literature.  Needless to say, she will be on a strict medication routine.  And we’ll do a formal reevaluation next summer, and the summer after that, and well, this is a long-term commitment.”

 

“Whatever we have to do to help her to have a full life,” Victor stated.

 

“Good.  We’re all on the same team here.  So tomorrow go to radiology then we’ll talk once again at the end of the week, once all of the tests are in.  Here are your appointments.”  The doctor slid a pair of cards across the desk.  “And your patient literature.  I had them printed in English to make it easier for you both to understand.”

 

“Thank you,” Yuuri said gratefully.  As they gathered their daughter up, they met their friends in reception.

 

“Well?” Phichit asked impatiently even as he scooped Nina up.

 

“Two more appointments but this one was the most unpleasant for her, I think,” Yuuri stated.

 

“It’s okay, honey,” Phichit soothed.  “We’ll go home and play with hamsters.”

 

Her eyes sparkled even as she cuddled up to him and the promise of animal play time.

 

* * *

  
  


A week passed by and Nina was outfitted with a Hello Kitty container to organize her medicine.  The patient educator sat with the four of them and went over the details of the treatment.  Returning to the house, Grandmaman Elena decided they needed a garden party to celebrate the positive move forward.  With tea and cake served the seven of them arranged themselves in the gazebo.

 

“So, I will see you again next summer?” she invited warmly.  “And maybe this time with your other?”

 

“It depends on his grandfather’s health but otherwise, yes,” Victor promised.  “We greatly appreciate your hospitality.”

 

“Nonsense, Victor.  You’ve stayed here almost every summer before you met your young man.  I’m just upset you didn’t invite me to the wedding.”

 

“If I recall, you were not able to travel at the time,” Victor pointed out.

 

“Just a little rheumatism,” she clucked.  “I could have made do.  Now, to plan another wedding.”

 

Phichit and Chris exchanged glances before Chris spoke.  “We’ve been thinking that we’d like to wait a couple of years.  After I retire...and hopefully after Nina reaches remission.”

 

“So long,” Elena fussed.

 

“I know, Grandmaman,” Chris stated softly.  “But I think it’s important that we have this time before we marry.”

 

Elena pouted, turning to Phichit to make her appeal.  Phichit took her hands and promised warmly, “If there is any reason to move up the date, we will.  But for now, you are healthy and so is my family.  Let’s wait and make something beautiful.”

 

She pursed her lips.  “Fine!  Be that way!”  She released Phichit’s hands and waved him off much to the Thai man’s amusement.  “Please tell me there won’t be any of those rodents.”

 

“Oh, the hamsters will be there,” Phichit argued.  Chris mouthed from behind,  _ I’ll talk to him _ , punctuating it with a wink.

 

Nina crawled into Chris’ lap and batted her blue eyes.  “Can I be your flower girl?”

 

He hugged her close.  “Who else would we have in such a place of honor?” he promised.  As she climbed down to chase after Cocoa, Chris placed two fingers over his lips thoughtfully, his eyes full of emotion.  “God, Vitya, now you have me wanting to adopt!”

 

Victor laughed.  “There are plenty of kids out there needing homes.”

 

Phichit threaded his hands onto Chris’.  “Maybe we should wait until  _ after  _ we are married, Chris love.”  Chris tilted his forehead toward Phichit, their noses brushing one another and perhaps just once another couple looked cuter than Victor and Yuuri.

 

* * *

  
  
  


As they prepared to board, Andrei frowned into his phone.  “Yura rescheduled his plane.  Is his grandfather doing worse?”

 

“He’s out but needs some help,” Yuuri explained.  “We pushed the trip to Japan out a couple of weeks to give him a chance to go with us.  I hope he can but I understand if he has to be with his grandfather.”

 

“Is he still mad that we made him stay?” Andrei asked as he put his phone away.

 

Victor shook his head.  “I think once he saw his grandfather, he knew that was where he needed to be.  It’s just hard to have to choose between family members.”

 

Andrei sighed knowingly.  “I’ll just be glad to be home in my own bed.”

 

“Agreed,” Yuuri echoed.

 

* * *

  
  


NOTES:

 

[ Pediatric HIV Infection Treatment & Management ](https://emedicine.medscape.com/article/965086-treatment)

 

Disclaimer:  I am not a doctor, nurse, or medical professional.  Just a writer hoping she’s writing a believable story.


	60. Chapter 60

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victor catches Yuri as he falls.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, BluSkates and Magrathea, for taking care of me at the last minute. 
> 
> Now, for the rest of you...this one gets you in the feels. So I'm setting out fuzzy blankets, tissues, and chocolates.

* * *

 

 

Victor stepped off the plane alone in Moscow.  After safely delivering his family back home he had grown restless and worried.  It continued over the next few days, talking with Pyotr and Katya because Yura wasn’t talking.  Finally, Yuuri came to him and put a hand on his shoulder.  “Go.  I can take care of what needs to be done here.  Go to him.”  And here he was waiting for Pyotr.

 

As they drove through the Moscow streets towards Pyotr and Katya’s apartment, Pyotr talked to him.  “It’s been a bad case and with his constant smoking over the years...it’s lung cancer.  They could operate but it would weaken him further.  They talked about chemo and radiation, but with the bloom of pneumonia on his lungs, it was hard to read it clearly.  So, treatment was delayed.  And Nikolai waited until he couldn’t go any further before going to the hospital.”

 

“Stubborn old man,” Victor grunted with a frown.

 

“He wants to talk to you.  It’s good that you came here.  Yura has been avoiding calling you about it because...it feels like giving up to him.  He’s angry and upset.”

 

“How long?”

 

“The doctor said a year at most.  Nikolai is refusing the treatments and they don’t offer him much longer.  He said he’d rather not spend his last days puking in a toilet unless vodka was involved.”

 

A sharp, bitter laugh left Victor’s lips.  “Sounds like the old man.  Let me get settled and call Yuuri.  Then we can go over.”

 

* * *

  
  


Yuri looked up as a shadow darkened his door.  “Victor!  Why are you here?”

 

“Where else would I be?”  Victor could see the weight of the last month on the boy’s face, shadows of worried, puffy eyes.  “Remember...you were first.”

 

Yuri drew his frame up, pretending to be strong, and ran at him, beating at his chest, until he collapsed into the strong arms that wrapped around him.  “It’s okay, Yura...I’ve got you.  Get it all out.”

 

The sob broke free.  He hated crying.  He was an ugly crier.  But once he started, he couldn’t stop.  Victor’s arms surrounded him, his hands moving up and down his back.  He’d been in this place before.  No matter how much he fought Victor, the older man always picked him up when he fell.  And now, Victor was his home.  And he felt so far away from both him and Katsudon.

 

He finally pulled back and shoved the tears off roughly.  “I’m okay.  I just...needed that.”

 

“Of course.  Anytime, Yura.”

 

He looked towards the worn mirror with the silver bubbling over the dresser, the broken down drawers that didn’t quite close, the bed that was propped up in one corner by a coffee can.  “This was my mother’s room before she moved out and became a model.  Grandpa always kept it the same.  When she...became sick, he brought me here.  I never changed it.  Sometimes it was all of her that I had.”

 

“Yura…”

 

“I should have done more, Victor!  I should have found a way to get him out of this drafty old house.  Then he wouldn’t have gotten sick.”

 

“Your grandpa wouldn’t allow that.  He made his own way in the world.  You know this,” Victor stated.

 

Yuri nodded.  He tried to send money home several times.  Nikolai always refused.  He tried to have his grandfather move to St. Petersburg.  The old man would simply say, “I can’t go.  This is the only place she knows to come home to.”  His mother’s illness trapped his grandfather here as much as his stubbornness.  The most he allowed was help in paying for his medicine...and in the early days, he didn’t know it came from Victor, not Yuri.  Yuri didn’t know either.  Just an anonymous sponsor.  When he found out, he was angry.  “I’m not a charity case!” he had yelled.  Victor just smiled his warm smile, the one he reserved for those he cared about and said simply, “It’s an investment.”  And that  _ investment  _ helped keep him afloat taking care of the expenses the state did not pay for and giving him enough to send home for his grandfather’s medicine.

 

Later that evening, they sat at the kitchen table and Nikolai stated in no uncertain terms that he expected Victor to stick to his word and watch out for Yuri.  Victor smiled over at the boy who had his knees drawn up to his chest like the older Yuuri would often do when stressed and murmured, “Of course, sir.  He’s family.”

 

That was his only concern, making sure Yuri was cared for.  Even though Yuri was technically an adult, according to the state, Nikolai knew he needed support and guidance still.  He was not quite a man and not a boy either.

 

Later, Yuri and Victor sat together drinking coffee that was robust...jet fuel...to say the least and talking about the next few weeks.  “I can’t go with you to Hasetsu.”

 

“We’ll postpone it,” Victor began.

 

Yuri shook his head.  “No...Katsudon needs to see his family and those kids need to meet their grandparents.  It’s...important to spend time with them.  You never know...how long...you have with...them.”  His words became broken by tears.  Victor waited for him to continue.  Finally, he recovered himself.  “Promise me you’ll go.  I can stay here.”

 

“I’m here for the next three days for you, Yura.  Let’s talk about these things as we go.”

 

* * *

  
  


That night, Victor left Yuri to stay with his grandfather and returned to Pyotr’s apartment.  “He can stay as long as he needs,” Pyotr promised.  “Katya and I don’t mind.”

 

“His training…”

 

“You get him on track and I’ll keep him there.  He’s still coming to practice.  It’s his only break.”

 

“He eventually needs to come home.”

 

“I think we both know he’s going to be spending a lot of time in Moscow.  Let us help you support him.”

 

Victor loved them for offering but, “The new baby…”

 

“Will arrive just fine.” Pyotr offered, with a practiced paternal inference.  “Having an extra body around won’t change that.”

 

“I just put my family together…”

 

“Sometimes you have to let the older ones go and do what needs to be done.”

 

“I know.  I just...hate being so far away from him.”

 

“We’ve all raised that boy.  Ever since he came to the rink that day.  We’ve all had a hand in how he turned out.  You know that.  He’s all of ours.  Let us do our part.  You have always been the big brother...and sometimes father figure.  But the rest of us are still family.”

 

Victor smiled and nodded his agreement.  “I know you’re right.  You will let me know if he needs us?  He doesn’t always reach out.”

 

“We will let you know.  Just like this time.”

 

Victor frowned, but accepted Pyotr’s words.  Walking through the house that night he paused watching Katya in the nursery singing Russian lullabies and rearranging things lovingly in the baby’s room.  She glanced up and smiled.  “You must miss your family.”

 

“It’s hard...when they are spread out.”

 

“So you went to the one in most need.”

 

“He’s pushing me away.  He wants me to go with Yuuri to Hasetsu.”

 

“He’ll be okay.  And if something happens, we are here for him until you can get here.”

 

* * *

  
  


Over the next two days, he worked with Yuri on his choreography getting it sorted back out.  “I miss Katsudon,” he murmured as they took the bus back to his grandfather’s.  Yuri could go alone but Victor wanted to spend as much time as he could with him.

 

“He misses you, too.”

 

“When you get back...if I still can’t come home…”

 

“We’ll come to see you…”

 

Yuri stared out the window.  “I just got settled.”

 

“It is still your home.  I promised you from the beginning that you’d always have a place with us.”

 

“Like Mama...and Grandpa.”

 

Victor nodded quietly.  Waiting for those old fears to come up.

 

“What if I’m like her...will I...still have a place?”

 

“Yes.  Always.”  Victor slipped an arm around Yuri’s shoulder and hugged him and Yuri didn’t stiffen and pull away.  He just let it happen.  Needing it but not admitting it.

 

Victor helped in the kitchen, cleaning while Nikolai directed Yuri on how to cook.  They’d share a smirk between them because they both knew Yuri could cook them all under the table often teasing him that he had a back up career.  Victor set the table and Yuri served up the  [ solyanka  ](https://www.saveur.com/article/Recipes/Solyanka-Russian-Sweet-and-Sour-Beef-Soup) with dark bread and butter.  The three of them talked warmly about pleasant things, Yuri’s training and coming season, Nikolai’s garden, some of the neighborhood kids Yuri knew and still asked about, Yuuri and the kids.  Victor shared pictures of his family with Nikolai and he laughed heartily, pausing to smile softly at the ones with Yuri.

 

* * *

  
  
  


The next day after practice, Victor took Yuri to dinner and they talked privately in a booth.  “I just...if I had never gone off to skate, he wouldn’t be alone.”

 

“Yura, you know he wanted this for you.  It was a chance to keep you off the streets.  This neighborhood is poor, and your opportunities were limited.”

 

“I know, but...I’m so far away,” his voice faded into a whisper.

 

Victor frowned.  His plane ticket was set to leave at six the next morning and he wasn’t sure if Yuri was ready for him to go.  “We’ll find a way for you to spend more time here.  Pyotr said he does not mind continuing to work with you.”

 

“But...he’s not you or Katsudon or Yakov or Lilia…”

 

“I know it’s not the same.  Perhaps...we can meet halfway.  You spend part of your time in St. Petersburg and part of it in Moscow.  That will give you extra time with your grandfather.”

 

Yuri frowned as he considered that option.  “It would be expensive,” he whispered.

 

Victor tousled the boy’s blond hair.  “I’ll give up first class seats for the season just so that you could make the necessary trips.”

 

Yuri’s eyes widened in surprise.  “Y-you would?”  For some reason, that seemed a big thing, one that was a greater sacrifice than coming down for these three days and rearranging trips and everything else they would do for him.  The tears that threatened to fall as he sniffed back and stared resolutely out the darkening window, his slender throat swallowing several times.  “I’ve always treated you like shit.”

 

Victor laughed softly.  “No, you didn’t.  You fought me because you knew it was safe.  I wasn’t going to push you away, and you needed a safe place.”

 

Those green eyes leveled on him.  “Why?  Why me?”

 

Victor shrugged.  “Because...I know what it’s like to wake up alone in this world.  Because...perhaps I saw a little of myself in you.  So...I adopted you the moment I laid eyes on you.  I decided I didn’t have a brother and neither did you so we’d be brothers.”

 

“I...needed that.  I didn’t appreciate it at the time...but I needed that.”

 

Victor rested his hand on the younger man’s shoulder.  “You always have that with me.  And with Yuuri.  Okay?”

 

Yuri nodded before looking at his empty plate.  How long had they been there?  Swallowing, he straightened up.  “You have an early flight.  I’ll be okay.”

 

“Are you sure?”

 

Yuri nodded.  Victor still insisted on taking him home, by cab this time.  The driver waited as Victor walked Yuri to the door.  “Thanks for coming to see me...to check on me.”

 

“Keep talking to us, Yura.  Pushing us out only makes us worry.  We want to be here for you.”

 

“I know.  And...I have Katya and Pyotr.  They’ve been good to me.”

 

“They’re family, too.”

 

“Yes...they are.”  Yuri stood with his hand on the door staring at the ground.  He then turned and suddenly threw his arms around Victor.  Those strong arms wrapped around him and he felt safe and warm and home for just the moment.  He backed off slowly and looked up with glittering green eyes.  “Have a safe trip, old man.  Give Katusdon that hug.”  As Victor opened his mouth to protest, Yuri smirked.  “What?  You thought it was for you?”  Opening the door, he glanced back.  “Thanks.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't have to research this...not much at all. When I looked up common causes of death and saw COPD and related complications in Russia, I knew this would happen. I knew how Yuri would feel. And I knew he would choose to spend what time he could with his grandfather.


	61. Chapter 61

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hasetsu. The family flies out so the kids can meet their grandparents.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of fluff and some bittersweetness.
> 
> Thanks, Blu and Mags, for the edits!

* * *

 

 

Yuuri would be the first to admit that he was dreading the flight home to his parents.  Not the visit itself but the flight.  He knew his daughter well enough to know that there will be at least one meltdown...and he would be the one that dealt with it because other than himself only Yura could get her to relax from a meltdown.  Victor’s energy actually made it worse and Andrei quietly watched, waiting for his sister to simply settle herself...which took far too long.

 

“Just remember, if I’m dealing with her, you get everything else,” he clarified to Victor.

 

“Don’t worry.  If you have Nina, Andrei and I can handle the rest without a problem,” Victor reassured him.

 

On the flight, Nina spent a lot of it going from lap to lap and trading out stuffed Makkachins with stuffed hamsters she brought back from Switzerland (complements of Phichit, of course).  She ran two phones down and an iPad watching movies.  She slept wrapped around Yuuri, her head snuggled up under his chin.  Andrei snapped a picture of the two of them and showed it to Victor.  They agreed to share it once they reached Japan.  As they drew near, Nina cried for Cocoa and Yura and Makkachin in that order.  Then they landed.

 

At the airport, Yuuri didn’t have to worry about Nina as the tiny girl was scooped out of his arms by Yuuko to learn that her Chichi’s friend had triplets who were eager to meet her.  Takeshi waited at the van and kept it running as they readied themselves in pickup.  Settling Nina in the car seat in the middle, Yuuri crawled on the other side of her.  Yuuko took the back seat next to Andrei and let Victor take the front with a little more leg room next to Takeshi.  The experienced father glanced back to make sure all were buckled in before pulling out into traffic calm and confident.

 

Yuuri heard the chitchat from the front between Victor and Takeshi.  He tried to focus on Yuuko’s words but she knew him and soon focused on Andrei asking him about his school.

 

“It’s an arts school and I’m studying piano,” he said in his shy, quiet manner.  “Madame Lidiya is giving me private lessons, as well.  I feel behind, though.  We’ve been traveling a lot.  Grandmaman allowed me to practice on her baby grand when we were in Switzerland.”  He looked up with wide eyes.  “I’ve never imagined that I’d travel so much.”  He turned his phone with the translation towards Yuuko.  They went back and forth using technology to bridge the language gap.

 

“These are well-traveled men who’ve taken you in.  You will see quite a bit of the world.”

 

“I just...I’m glad to be with them.  They take good care of my sister...and me.”

 

Yuuko smiled glancing over at Yuuri who was dozing.  “They are good people.  You could definitely do worse.”

 

At the inn, they were surrounded by family and friends, and Nina found herself becoming overwhelmed and hiding behind Yuuri.  Then Victor picked her up and settled her on his shoulders.  She squealed with delight and felt much better once she was above the crowd, something Victor discovered by accident.  He teased her that when she gets too big for his shoulders, he’ll have to invest in stilts.  Andrei and Yuri thought it was a brilliant idea, of course, and bugged Victor for weeks until he bought them a pair to play around with in the backyard...with the promise to spot one another, of course.

 

Hiroko finally stepped in and cleared the crowd so her son and granddaughter could get the rest they sorely needed.  He thanked her and slipped away.  After quick showers, they snuggled up in their pajamas and into the blankets of the large bed together.  Cocoa stretched out at the foot of the bed happy to be out of her carrier.   Yuuri could hear Victor puttering about the room unpacking and plugging in electronics.  He then heard the door slide open and shut and the shower running.  Andrei was staying in Yuuri’s old room, and one of the storage closets was opened up and a futon laid out for Nina...although for the moment, she was cuddled up to her Chichi.

 

* * *

  
  


Victor carried his phone downstairs, charging it in the den.  As soon as it had enough power, a text came through from Yura.

 

**Yura/ Old man!  Try to bring back some of Mama Katsuki’s tea!  And cookies! And candy!**

 

He chuckled and shared the message with Hiroko.  “Tell him not to worry.  I’ll send him plenty of treats back.”  They were disappointed “Yurio” couldn’t join them but understood.

 

Toshiya stated, “He needs to take care of family and be at peace.”

 

“He knows that...but he’s still upset.  For so many reasons.  His emotions are all over the place.”  Victor studied the cup of tea provided by his mother-in-law.

 

“So much more like our Yuuri than he likes to admit,” Hiroko chuckled.  “I could see it when he was here.  A bit of hero worship, but he saw a little of himself in Yuuri.”

 

Victor smiled in agreement.  Probably more than they realized.  “It’s good that he’s staying with us, though.  He has the structure he hasn’t had in years.  And life outside of skating.”

 

“Sometimes we worried that Yuuri didn’t have life outside of skating,” Toshiya pointed out.  “Then we realized he had it but that it was quiet.  Books, piano, electronics, dance, and a couple of close friends.  He had other friends, too.  But not close like the Nishigoris.  He spent so much time alone.”

 

“He still does in a way...it’s just that our presence doesn’t unsettle his sense of quiet.  I think...he becomes used to people in his space,” Victor observed.  “And Nina is always in his space.  She is very much Chichi’s girl.  Or Yura’s,” Victor added with a chuckle.  “I have found Andrei drawing closer to me, though.”

 

“You are the strength in the family.  They know you will protect and take care of them.  Yuuri is the nurturer.  It’s different kinds of love,” Hiroko pointed out.  “I am certain that Nina has her moments where she wants her Papa as well.”

 

Victor smiled and nodded.  “When she feels unsettled and wants to feel safe.  Or if she just wants to play.  It...wasn’t what we planned.  But I don’t regret taking them all in.”

 

“I knew they stole your hearts when you told us about them last spring,” Hiroko teased.  “Of course, you both are good with children.  We saw how you were with the triplets.  Patient.  Maybe a little indulgent...but that is part of the way you show your love.”

 

* * *

  
  


That evening, Yuuri and the kids shook off their naps and joined the family and the group slowly swelled with Minako and Mari.  Later, Yuuko arrived with the girls wanting to meet Nina and Andrei.

 

“Do you skate?” Lutz demanded.

 

Nina looked nervously towards her Chichi and Papa before turning back to the inquisitive triplet.  Yuuri explained what was being said and she tilted her hand back and forth.  “A little bit.  I dance, too.  A little bit.”  She then offered them each a Makkachin or a hamster (just not  _ her  _ Makkachin).  The girls were thrilled with the gifts.  Soon Nina broke away as the girls found a way to communicate using technology and motions and they giggled and played together.

 

“Children.  They always find a way to communicate faster than adults.”

 

Andrei remained quiet; he felt comfortable Yuuko, and if he wasn’t close to Victor and Yuuri, he’d talk with her.  He smiled warmly towards his grandparents who communicated with him using the rudimentary Russian they had learned from Victor during his stay.  He appreciated it, and used the phone app Yuuko shared with him to finally bridge the gap and start talking with the others.

 

As the crowd thinned once more, Andrei leaned in and asked Yuuri if he could use the keyboard he found in the room where he was staying.  Yuuri told him there should be earphones nearby and he excused himself.  Yuuri watched him retreat and spotted his daughter curled up asleep on the sofa clutching her Makkachin.  “He’s a lot like me,” he told his mother.  “Except, rather than running off to the rink or dance studio, he retreats to his music.  He likes to dance, though Nina likes it more.  And the ice.  If we can keep her healthy, she may compete.  We want it to be her decision, though.”

 

“It should always be their decision,” Hiroko murmured.  “Kids have their own dreams.  If Mari did not want the onsen, we’d plan to sell it when we retired.  That is her dream.  But such dreams would have stifled you.”

 

“I can cook, but not on the scale you cook on,” Yuuri stated with a smile.  “Yura, on the other hand, he kicks us out of the kitchen when he gets serious about cooking.  I think he could handle it.”

 

“Perhaps when you move here, I will take him as an apprentice.  Pass on the family secrets,” she teased with a wink.

 

“Oh, please do!  I can’t get katsudon just right and there is always something missing when I cook.  It’s good.  Just not your kind of good.”

 

She chuckled.  “I can work with you both.  It may be something small.”  She reached up and touched his cheek with a tender smile.  “You’ve made a good family, my son.  I can’t wait until you are all living here with us.  I know you need to stay where you are at for now...but I look forward to more time with my son...and his family...our family.”

 

“Thank you, Okaasan.”

  
  


* * *

  
  


Several days into their visit, they were enjoying a summer festival when Yuuri’s mother exclaimed, “When did you get your ears pierced?”

 

“Last summer.  It was here.  Did you not notice?” he lifted his eyes to meet Victor’s and traded a secret smile before turning back to his mother.

 

“Not at all.  Such lovely earrings.  Simple.”

 

“Victor bought them as a gift.  Sapphires are my favorite...well these and the diamonds.  I usually stick with studs.”

 

“I remember when your sister came home with her fifth or maybe sixth piercing.  Now there are so many I can’t keep count.  Perhaps that’s why I didn’t notice the one.”  Her eyes rested fondly on her older child.  Two very different children, but both very close to each other.

 

* * *

  
  


Mari sat with her brother and brother-in-law on the patio after everyone else had gone to sleep.  Small lantern patio lights provided a soft glow.  She flicked her cigarette towards the brazier that held a small fire to chase away the summer chill and night air.  “So what’s the plan?”

 

Yuuri laughed.  “When we plan, something always comes up to change it.”

 

Victor drummed his fingers on the table.  “I think currently, it’s for me to retire after the Olympics.  Yakov and Lilia are trying to decide what they are going to do but she’s getting stronger.  That being said, they’ve been tossing around the word retirement.  I know other coaches have been taking over his younger students.  If they can work with the ones that stay, we’ll come here once...well, Yura’s grandfather isn’t doing well.  We don’t want to take him away or leave him behind.”

 

They all sobered at that, Yuuri taking a sip of tea, Victor from his coffee, and Mari a drag from her cigarette.  Yuuri broke the silence.  “When we come, there is still a lot to do before we can take students.  I mean, Yuri and I can continue to train at the rink, but it’s not really a training facility.”

 

“How is it going to compete with facilities in Fukuoka?” Mari asked, her business training coming forward.

 

“I’ve talked with a couple of coaches out of Fukuoka, and they said that it would pull pressure off their ice times if we can take some of the students and their coaches.  They’d pay for improvements in facilities.  It’s not as big as where we currently train, but it will help with the economy here.  Yuuri and I can work with younger students and take a few older ones on up in the ranks.”

 

“And the kids?” she asked, practical and to the point.

 

Their eyes met and Yuuri turned to study his mug as he answered, “There are always plenty to pick up the gap here.  I mean, the Russian skate team has helped out whenever needed in St. Petersburg.  And when they are unavailable, then we have Madame Lidiya.  Once I retire, though, I don’t plan to travel as much.  I hope to hold things down here and focus on local events.  Victor will handle the international events.  Of course, as I said...we plan and everything falls apart.  But we usually figure out how to solve the problems as they come.”

 

Victor leaned forward and studied Mari for a moment before asking, “What about you, Mari?  What’s your plan?”

 

She snickered.  “Take over the family business.  I thought that was obvious.  But...if you pull yours off and tourism increases, it might be worth it to expand into a ryokan and make it a proper destination location.  I haven’t talked to our parents about the expansion because at the moment, the numbers don’t support it.  But...that’s the dream.”

 

“I would love to see Hasetsu come back to life,” Yuuri said wistfully.  “We’re all taking risks, though.  I just hope…”

 

“Not hope, Yuuri.  You know I’ve run the numbers and talked with attorneys and business associates.  I started with an idea...but I’ve backed it up with research.  This is doable,” Victor said emphatically.

 

Mari pulled out a small container of sake and poured shots.  Lifting the small cups up, she stated, “To the numbers.”

 

The other two echoed her toast.  It was time to turn in and they cleaned up, unplugged the lanterns and slipped back into the house.  Yuuri found Nina curled up around Cocoa in their bed.  “Looks like someone woke up.”

 

“Probably the bathroom,” Victor whispered.  He scooped her up and moved her over settling in beside her.  She cuddled into his arms.  Yuuri was soon resting behind him.  They didn’t have much longer left in Hasetsu but the kids were already fitting into Yuuri’s family.

 

* * *

  
  


The next day, Andrei was helping Toshiya work on a pump for the onsen and Nina was shadowing Hiroko handing her ingredients.  They were already picking up on some Japanese, basic but still showing an ear for the language.  Victor and Yuuri could hear Hiroko clucking at Nina and their daughter teasing her back.  They had time to escape to the ice with the kids occupied, so they slipped out the door.

 

Ice Castle was still when they entered through the back door.  “What do you have in mind?” Victor murmured as they tied on their skates.

 

“I want to skate together.  Maybe a new exhibition that we can perform together, given the right circumstances.”

 

“That sounds like you’ve already started thinking about something.”

 

“Something... [ Perfect ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eiDiKwbGfIY) .”  Yuuri looked up, his expression soft as he turned on the music.  Taking Victor’s hand, he lead him into a dance and Victor’s eyebrows rose as the Italian joined in and he smiled with a nod.  Perfect indeed.  They skated in and out of one another’s space their fingers finding one another, their eyes only on one another, Yuuri leading him through the steps.  “You know I love you,” he murmured as they skated near one another.  “I love our life together,” he added in another pass.  “I never dreamed a life so perfect as the one we have with one another.”

 

Victor enclosed him in his arms from behind.  “I think...we can definitely do something with this.  Yes.  I want to do this.”

 

Yuuri’s eyes lit up.  “Thank you.  And, if you haven’t noticed, I’m feeding into your Ed Sheeran obsession.”

 

“I think you are developing a taste for his music.”

 

Yuuri chuckled warmly as Victor turned him in his embrace.  “I already developed a taste for all things  _ Victor _ ...I suppose that will include his music.”  He lifted his lips for a kiss.  With the kids in such close quarters, intimacy was rare and they missed one another, their touches and kisses, just the two of them.  They took advantage of the quiet of the rink, continuing to trade kisses, continuing to skate together and loosely working out the choreography of the song.

 

As they walked back, Victor pressed his next idea.  “You should let me throw you.”

 

“You’re fucking nuts!”

 

“You trust me, don’t you?”

 

“I think launching myself into the air is perfectly acceptable.  Having someone toss me, fucking nuts!”

 

“Think about it,” Victor beseeched him.

 

Yuuri raised an eyebrow doubtfully.  “I love skating with you...but this is crazy.”

 

“We can do it.  Something minor.  More than lifts.  You’re light enough.  I can do it.”

 

Yuuri pulled out his phone and checked the time in Russia before putting through the call.  “Yura, Victor wants to throw me in an exhibition skate…”  He then handed the phone to Victor and smirked as he heard the rapid Russian telling him off.

 

Handing the phone back, Victor narrowed his eyes.  “That was a low blow...using our kids against me like that.”

 

“I do what I must,” Yuuri responded flippantly.

 

* * *

  
  


Hiroko was in tears as they loaded the family and luggage in Yuuko’s van.  “It’s getting harder and harder to let you go, my son.”

 

“I know, Okaasan.  We’ll be back to stay soon.  I hate leaving, too.”

 

She reached up and ran her hand over his cheek.  “Soon.  Make sure you give Yurio his treats.”

 

“I will.  He will demand it.”

 

“He needs it...keeps him from feeling left out.”

 

* * *

  
  
  


Victor caught a flight to Moscow the very next day after reaching St. Petersburg.  He was exhausted, but Yuri was coming home and he didn’t want the boy flying alone...not with as much emotional baggage as he was carrying.  He stood in the Moscow airport waiting for the flight when Yuri walked up.

 

“Victor…” he said in surprise.

 

“It’s time to come home, Yura,” he murmured.  And then grunted when the blond flung himself into Victor’s arms.  “We missed you, too.”

 

“I can’t believe you flew here...just to fly home with me?”

 

“Well, it seemed the right thing to do.  We’re family, after all.”

 

“I’m going to have a lot of trips back and forth.  Pyotr has been working out a loose schedule with Yakov.  You know I can fly by myself,” he said pointedly.

 

“I know...but this time, I didn’t want you to.”

 

He sighed and a small smile found his lips.  “Thank you.  I’m...so tired, Victor.”

 

“It’s been a heavy weight on your shoulder.”

 

“Sometimes I feel like a man...but then I feel like a kid, too.  When...does that go away?”

 

“If you’re lucky, never,” Victor stated softly.

 

“Oh,” Yuri said quietly.  They loaded onto the plane.  It was time.


	62. Supermarket Flowers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Summary: It rains to hide our tears…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't want to post this on Christmas because this chapter is very sad. Sunshine is coming...eventually.
> 
> *lays out tissues and fuzzy blankets and kittens and bunnies and chocolate*

* * *

 

[ Supermarket Flowers ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Mk0F6mLKik)

 

 

 

Their fall settled into routine, the Yu(u)ris and Victor skating, the kids school work and practice, Yuri flying back and forth to Moscow, staying with Pyotr and Katya.   Everyone was watching out for Yuri and his grandfather; that’s when the dark clouds snuck in from behind them.

 

Boris drove into the quiet neighborhood.  The attorneys would be contacting Victor later that day but the bear of a Russian felt the need to deliver the sad news himself.  He knocked on the door.  While he waited, he took in the well maintained yard scattered with recent leaves littering the yard as the weather turned.  The wind held a bite to it, warning of early snow and ice.  Of course, it was St. Petersburg...so that was normal.  The door opened and Victor smiled his greeting until he took in Boris’ demeanor.

 

“Won’t you come in?”

 

“Thank you.”  He stepped into the room as Yuuri came out of the kitchen drying his hand on a towel.

 

The Japanese man folded the towel neatly and laid it on the counter before coming into the living room to greet him.  “Boris, what  a surprise?  What brings you here?”

 

The Russian thinned his lips and cast his eyes down sadly.  “I wish it was good news, Yuuri.  I’ve come with news about Irena and...well, I didn’t want it to come to you through the attorneys.”

 

Yuuri motioned for him to have a seat, taking the one next to him.  Victor stood behind Yuuri and watched as Yuuri took their guest’s hand in his.  “She’s passed on, hasn’t she?”

 

Boris nodded, “I’m afraid so.  It was such a simple illness that took her.  Influenza.  But she didn’t have any immunity left to fight it.  They said...she looked peaceful.  The picture of her kids, the one that you both gave her...that was in her hands.  I think...she knew.”

 

Yuuri sighed, the sadness settling into his shoulders.  “We’ll talk with the kids to see how they want to handle her funeral arrangements.  Also, can you tell us how to reach her friends from her old neighborhood?  Andrei made it sound as if they were quite close.”

 

“I can,” Boris agreed hesitantly.  “Yuuri...they aren’t the most wholesome of people.  I want to forewarn you.”

 

Yuuri smiled sadly.  “I kinda suspected that.  But...stripping away the labels they have to wear because of poverty and prejudice, people still have the basic need to mourn those they care about.  I do not want to deprive them of this...and I think Andrei needs it.  Thank you.”

 

“I’ll contact the social worker that handled her case.  He will be able to forward you a list of names that kept in touch with her.”  Squeezing Yuuri’s hands, he added a soft, “Thank you...for everything.”  Looking up towards Victor, he continued, “Both of you...she was able to pass away peacefully knowing her kids were in good hands.”

 

* * *

  
  
  


They picked up Yuri first and told him about the kids’ mother before picking them up from the school.  They held off on sharing the news until after they arrived home, Yuuri making tea to warm them up from the drizzle that had set in during the afternoon...and well, because that’s what Katsukis do when talk gets serious.

 

They were seated around the table, steaming mugs in front of them and Yuuri refrained from commenting as Victor dipped jam into the mix.  Andrei looked from one to the other and finally cut to the point.  “What’s going on?”

 

Yuuri sighed as he took his hand.  “Andrei, Boris stopped by today.  It’s about your mother...she’s passed away.”

 

Andrei, for the most part, was the easy going one but he could break down when things hit close to his heart.  His mouth quivered and Yuuri already had his hand out to gather him into a strong embrace.  “Mama,” he whispered as he let his heart break.

 

Nina, wailing inconsolably, crawled up into Victor’s arms.  Two dogs were sniffing their young humans trying to figure out what the cause of the distress could be.  Victor looked across the table to Yuri and could see a single tear leaking out of his eyes.  This was hitting too close to home for the older teen.

 

Finally, Andrei recovered and stood up, shoving the tears from his cheeks.  “What now?”

 

“That depends on what you want,” Victor stated as he bounced Nina.  The child realized her Chichi was free, though, and reached for him.  Yuuri gathered her to his chest and she clung to him, sniffing quietly and holding onto him.

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“When we met her, we determined that she would have a proper burial.  We arranged for her to be placed near my own mother.  But I’m not sure what kind of funeral you would like to have...or if you want to attend one at all.”

 

Andrei considered Victor’s words, visibly touched that these men had taken them in as family as to even see to his mother, even in death.  He had learned that they had sent comfort items to her over the months.  They started adding some of their own items over the months...drawings from Nina, recordings from Andrei.  Victor made sure she had a means to listen to the latter.  Andrei knew his mother couldn’t read but wanted her to know they were happy and understood her decision.  The taped letters, they learned, helped her find greater peace in her decisions.  Yuuri would add in teas from his mother and more than once they sent blankets, soft pajamas, personal care items, and more.  They respected her request for the children not see her but her social worker let them know that she appreciated the contact she was given.  In the end, she didn’t just fade from life but found solace in the love and care provided by these strangers who took in her children.

 

Now...as they considered the final decisions, Andrei asked quietly, “Can we not do a church funeral?  Mama would not like that.  She’d rather be surrounded by friends that stood by her.”

 

“We already asked to be put in contact with friends from her old neighborhood,” Yuuri offered softly.

 

“Perhaps a graveside service then a gathering of friends to celebrate her life,” Victor proposed.

 

“Can we do it in the old neighborhood in case some can’t come to her funeral?  There’s a community room in our old building,” Andrei suggested.

 

“I think that’s an excellent idea.  Once we’ve reached her old friends, we’ll be able to make more concrete plans.”

 

Andrei hugged them both.  “Thank you...I think...would it be okay if I’m by myself for a while?”

 

“Do what you need to do, Andrei,” Yuuri encouraged.  “We’re here if you need us.”

  
  


* * *

 

A few hours later, Yuri looked up as someone tapped on his door and spotted Andrei.  “Hi, Yura...I wanted to know...would you help me put a playlist together of my mother’s favorite songs?  Some are folk songs her mama sang to her...and some are just songs from the old neighborhood.”

 

The blonde smiled warmly.  “Of course.  I bet some are similar to the ones  _ my  _ mama sang.  Let’s see what we can find.”

 

“You...rarely talk about your own mama,” Andrei whispered as they sat together facing Yuri’s computer.

 

“She...was a model.  Elena  Plisetskaya.  That is until she couldn’t hold her thoughts together.  That wasn’t too long after I was born.  My papa couldn’t handle the changes going on with Mama so he took her to Grandpa and left.  I was part of that package.  I never heard from him again.  But Grandpa...he tried to see to her and get her on medication.  I was seven when he took me away from her.  She’d been working at a store when the manager called Grandpa and told him she hadn’t been in for three days.  He found her just staring out the window and I was trying to take care of her and myself...and failing.  It was a fight but Grandpa managed to get custody of me.  After that, she hardly came over to see him.  But the store where she worked always took her back...the owner was someone that she worked with when she modeled, an old friend that never abandoned her.”

 

“Do you still see her?”

 

Yuri nodded.  “Sometimes.  It’s hard because if she’s not taking her meds, she doesn’t always know me.”

 

“What happened...to make her change?”

 

Yuri sighed as he searched for the right words.  “I think she was born that way.  Grandpa said it was the same with his wife, her mama.  I never met her because she took her own life while Mama was a teenager.  But...they just check out of life.”  He looked down and studied his fingers for a moment before he added, “That’s why I have to accomplish so much as quickly as possible.  I don’t...know how much time I’ll have until I’m like her.”

 

Andrei’s eyes widened.  “There’s no guarantee you’ll be like her!” he protested, not knowing but wanting it to be true.

 

Yuri smiled sadly.  “No, I don’t suppose I know.  And Yuuri says there are more and more medications available.  He’s been talking more and more about meds for his anxiety but he’d rather avoid them if it’s not necessary.  But for Mama, it’s necessary.  She can’t separate reality from her delusions otherwise.”

 

“That sounds scary,” Andrei admitted, his voice small.

 

Yuri studied the sad boy beside him.  “Enough about her.  Let’s focus on your Mama’s favorite songs.  What’s the first one that comes to mind?”

 

“ [ My Heart ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=26trS3tdoTc) ...my mother loved popular music…”  They worked together until called in for dinner, returning to the project afterwards.  Victor informed Andrei that he was able to make the arrangements he requested and that a Yuliya wanted to visit him.  “She’s like an aunt to me...I’d take my sister to her house when Mama would be working and she looked out for us.”  He leaned in and whispered, “Yuliya is transgender.”

 

Victor smiled warmly.  “I picked up on that.  I understood that you grew up in a very diverse environment.”

 

Andrei smiled, a little warmth grew around the edges of his sadness.  “Yeah...that’s a good way to put it.  Mama said those that have nothing protect their own.”

 

“Very true,” Victor murmured.

 

The grey eyes caught the older man’s blue eyes and asked quietly, “What was your mama like?”

 

He smiled, his expression a mixture of fondness and regret.  “She was kind...but some old ideas made it hard for her to accept me.  Still, she supported my desire to dance and skate.  She hoped I would  _ grow out of my other ideas _ .  I don’t...know that she would have accepted Yuuri in my life but I hoped that if she’d lived, she would have eventually come around.  But I know she loved me.  We just didn’t see eye to eye.”

 

“I’m sorry I made you sad,” Andrei said softly.

 

The older man shook his head and put a warm hand over Andrei’s.  “Do not apologize.  It’s fine to be sad as long as it doesn’t stay around too long.  Yuuri taught me to find sunshine in the rain.”

 

“Yuuri’s pretty amazing.”  He studied the floor thoughtfully before he asked, “Is it okay that I still call you Victor and Yuuri?”

 

“We know you want to be here and if our names give you the structure you need to be comfortable, then we are fine with it.”

 

“It’s just that...my...Papa...he was a bad man.  He hurt my Mama.  I don’t want to think of him when I look at the two of you.  And my Mama...there is only her...was only her.”  He felt the tears building and allowed himself to be pulled into the older man’s strong arms.

 

“We understand, Andrei.  Truly.  Don’t worry about it.  Your place is with us no matter what you call us.”  Victor tilted his chin up and tweaked his nose.  “Besides, the Angry Kitten calls us Old Man and Katsudon.”

 

Andrei smiled, still sad around the edges, but a smile still the same.  “Those are his names for you and they mean something to him.  Perhaps...one day...I’ll find my own.”

 

“There is no rush, Dyusha.  We will always be home for you.”  His arms tightened as he felt Andrei bury himself into Victor’s embrace, long fingers sliding into lengthening hair.

 

Andrei shoved his hand through his hair.  “Should I get it cut?  For Mama?”

 

“Is that what you want?”

 

He smiled sadly and nodded.  “She liked it neat and trimmed.  She said important men took care of their hair.”

 

“You can take care of it and leave it long...but if you want it cut, I can make a call and have you in to see my stylist first thing in the morning.”

 

“I think...I do.  For her.”

 

“Very well.  I’ll make the call.”

 

* * *

  
  
  


The morning of the funeral it misted.  Victor was just thankful it wasn’t a steady downpour.  A small party accompanied the coffin to its burial and she was indeed put to rest next to Victor’s mother and grandmother.  “My cousins would have a fit but Babushka would love her.  She was open and accepting like that.  She’d say the world takes all kinds and accept you at face value.”  Looking up at Yuuri, he wound his fingers into his husband’s.  “She’d love you.”  His eyes fell upon his mother’s and he sighed.  “I don’t know about Mama.  She...when I finally came out openly to her, she was angry.  I know it wasn’t a surprise but she pushed me away.  I ran to my Babushka.  Later…” Victor’s voice caught and he worked to swallow down the sobs.  “Later the police came by to tell us she had been in an accident...and that it had taken her life.  We never resolved the anger between us...but I loved her.  I still love her.”

 

“Mother’s love their sons even if they don’t agree with him,” Yuuri said softly.  Victor looked up and smiled.  They placed the simple flowers picked up at the supermarket on her grave and another bouquet on his grandmother.  Andrei insisted his mother wouldn’t expect flowers from a florist.  Too expensive.  This was the right thing to do.  They studied both children, each with the largest bouquets of flowers they could find.  As the coffin was lowered at the close of the official’s words, each child pulled a flower out of the bouquet and tossed it into the grave with her.  The rest of the flowers were laid next to the marker that would keep her place until a proper stone was set.

 

After, Yuliya rode with the family to the unfamiliar part of town and Victor took in the poverty he saw without reaction.  He could see that Yuri was surprised at the degree of depravity around them.  He covered it quickly, though.  His Yuuri was focused on the children and getting to know Yuliya.  “Just because we live close to the rink doesn’t mean we want to cut them off from those who love and care for them,” he heard Yuuri emphasizing.  “I think Andrei needs this connection.”

 

“We...aren’t welcome in nicer parts of town,” Yuliya protested gently.  “You do understand how we make our living.”

 

Yuuri held her eyes steadily.  “We all find ourselves unwelcome in various parts of town for various reasons.  We live a very lowkey life while here in Russia because we don’t want to draw attention to ourselves as gay men in Russia.  I know Andrei still gets hassled at school about it...and I hate that.”

 

“We live where we live because nowhere else accepts us.  I work in a dragbar.  My neighbor dances…”

 

Yuuri held onto Yuliya’s eyes and stated quietly, “And I’ve performed on a pole throughout college in part to support myself and then later to help others who couldn’t pay their skate fees because I know what it’s like to not be able to pay my way.”  He ignored two pairs of teenage eyes watching him, ears perked up at that confession.  “I may have had the privilege of living in nicer neighborhoods, but we’re performers...and one thing we know...sex sells.”

 

Yuliya held his eyes for a long time before her deep warm laugh filled the car.  “You speak truth.  My people will like you.  Andrei chose well.”

 

The neighborhood all seemed to move in and out of the small room, which was set up for the memorial service.  Andrei stared at a collage of pictures of his mother and growing up in the neighborhood.  A familiar hand rested on his shoulder.  He looked up to see one of their neighbors, Inga.  “She was amazing,” she murmured.  “Everyone’s Mama.  We thank you for sharing this with us.  We will all miss her.”  Inga pulled him into a side hug.  “Are they treating you well?”

 

Andrei laughed softly.  “Yes, they are.”  His eyes watched as Nina was passed from person to person as they fussed over her.  She insisted on wearing pink because “It’s Mama’s favorite color.”  He even chose a pink tie for the same reason and the rest of his family followed suit.

 

As they left, Andrei and Nina were given a number of gifts including pictures...things to remind them of their mother...so they’d never forget her.  As Andrei walked to his room that night he carried close to his heart a photo of his mother, taken when she was healthy and lively.  He kissed her image before placing it next to the lamp on his nightstand.  Yuuri promised to help him find a frame tomorrow.  He stared at her picture as he fell asleep.   _ Now you will know no more pain, Mama.  Be at peace. _

 

* * *

  
  
  


And it seemed as one life is ushered out of the world another joined it.  Katya and Pyotr were preparing to bring their daughter into the world.  Yuri went back to Moscow after the funeral needing more time with his grandfather, needing to see his own mother who worked in the store down the street from Katya and Pyotr, needing to recover his own heart and catch his breath.

 

She stood sorting through the stock in the back of the store when he entered.  She didn’t look up at first and Yuri was able to observe her.  He could see the beauty she once held, faded now by the ravages of her mental illness.  He could hear her whispering as she put things away and knew that she was caught in one of her fantasies.  The owner of the store had traveled with her and was a model herself at one time.  His mother was well cared for and the owner made sure she had a warm bed and a means to make a living.  On her worse days, though, she was relegated to the back.

 

“Mama…” he murmured.

 

The woman looked up and stared at him a moment before recognition filled her green eyes.  How they matched her son’s!  “Yura!  You’ve come to see me!”

 

He smiled shyly, playing with the ends of his lengthening hair.  “I wanted to see how you were doing.”

 

“Claire takes such good care of me.  How are you?”

 

“It’s been busy...I’ve been skating and looking out for Grandfather.  Have you...gone to see him?”

 

Her expression became distant.  “We just fight.”

 

Yuri knew that was just her delusions.  Grandfather only fought with her when he had to take Yuri away from her, other than that he loved and supported his daughter as best he could.  He understood Elena’s illness, he knew she couldn’t help it.  Yuri was just thankful Claire took care of her and kept in touch with him.

 

“He’s not doing well, Mama.  I know he’d like to see you.”

 

She stared at the boxes she was shelving, blinking rapidly.  Finally, she murmured, “Perhaps.”

 

He didn’t go back to Katya’s and Pyotr’s that night.  They were at the hospital, at three in the morning, bringing  Evgeniya into the world .  He left his grandfather’s the next morning to go see the little bundle with her head full of strawberry blonde hair.  Mila was on her way with her parents and Yuri met with Pyotr’s parents who offered him a place to stay if needed.

 

“I’m fine...I can stay with my Grandpa.”  Yuuri looked through the mirror and watched Evgeniya wriggle in her blankets.  “She certainly seems alert.”

 

He spent the rest of his stay with his Grandpa carrying piroshkis back with him to share with his family.  The blonde smiled out the window of the plane.   _ My family.  _  Even though there was sadness, he knew they would be there for each other.  And that was enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much to BluSkates for the edits. Magrathea is in the land of low wifi so our thoughts and prayers are with her that the wifi fairy will drop some pixie dust on her.
> 
> Also, I decided to end this part on Ch. 65. But I'm also coming up with another part that goes in between this one and the other one I had planned. It's just...this one keeps going and going and going and I found a good breaking point.


	63. Chapter 63

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grand Prix progression...sort of...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *lays out fuzzy blankets, hot chocolate, and fuzzy socks* It's cold out there. 
> 
> This chapter is...bittersweet. I will give you Victor's birthday next chapter, though...and post it on Monday. We'll wrap up this part on Thursday with another bittersweet chapter.

* * *

 

 

Over the next few months, Victor and both Yu(u)ris were on the move with competitions.  The Baranovskaya sisters stepped in to help with the children while they were away, seeing that they made it to school and tending to dancing and piano lessons.  Makkachin kept watch over Nina and was quick to cuddle up to her when she broke down in wails, crying out for Chichi, Papa, Cocoa, and Yura...in that order.  Yura’s cat would watch the whole scene disdainfully before walking off with her head in the air.

 

Lilia came up to the child with a firm voice.  “Enough now, Miss Nina.  Ballerinas must observe decorum at all times.  Now straighten up.  Let’s go through your positions.”

 

Nina, who was often in awe of Madame Lilia, sniffed back the last of her tears and stood up, following Lilia to the old ballroom that was often used by the skaters living in her home as a ballet studio.  In fact, a barre was installed along one wall once Lilia took charge of the residence.  Nina placed her hand upon the worn smooth wood and went through her positions in rhythm with the tap of Lilia’s cane.

 

“There, now.  Your Chichi will be most pleased.  You should do this every time you start feeling sad, that way you can make your Chichi happy, yes, Miss Nina?”

 

“Of course, Madame Lilia.  Thank you, Madame Lilia,” she answered with a curtsy.

 

Down the hall, Andrei could be heard running through scales, arpeggios, chords, and Hanon exercises at Madame Lidiya’s insistence.  Lilia would, from time to time, settle Nina in the room with her sister and disappear for a nap.  Her stamina had not recovered and having children about her all of the time could be wearing but Lidiya was much happier with their presence.

 

“Come, Nina,” she’d invite after a time.  “Perhaps you would sing for us.”  Lidiya would then lead Nina into a lullaby or folk song. Nina picked up the memorization of the lyrics over the multiple visits, performing for her fathers upon their return.

 

Victor tried to pay Lidiya for the care she provided their children but Lidiya waved it away.  “You could not afford me, silly boy.  Let me be a doting aunt.  We are, after all, family.”

 

“You teach my son, you watch my daughter...you need some compensation,” he protested.

 

“I do these things because you are family...and because in caring for my sister, I need...something more.  Watching your children gives me joy.”

 

“They are our delight as well.  Please promise me you’ll speak up if we are taking advantage of you.  They love coming here but I know they can be tiring.”

 

“I will.  Do not worry.”

 

Later, Yuuri visited Lilia with a similar conversation voicing his concerns about the children tiring her out.  “I don’t want you to suffer any setbacks because of them,” he solicited.

 

“Nonsense, Yuuri.  My sister takes them both on when I tire.  I love having them here...they are the closest to grandchildren that I have and I will not give them up.”

 

“Very well...we just want to be sure we have you with us as long as possible, Madame Lilia.”  He squeezed her hand warmly.

 

“Don’t you worry.  I’m recovering well enough and there is talk of possible remission.  Maybe one day soon, we can release both you and Vitya from your service.  I know you miss your family.”

 

“I do miss them but this is where I’m meant to be.  Coming here brought me into this family and led me to my children.  I wouldn’t change any of that.”

 

“So no regrets?”

 

“None whatsoever, Madame Lilia.”

 

* * *

  
  


Yuri came home and collapsed.  It was two weeks before the final and the blonde found himself exhausted.  Yuuri came to his room and studied the boy, his pallor worrying.  “You’re going to make yourself sick at this pace.”

 

Yura’s face was long as he met Yuuri’s eyes.  He shoved his hand back through his hair.  “I...can’t stop fighting.”

 

“I’m not suggesting otherwise,” the Japanese man countered as he grabbed the chair and pulled it over next to the teen’s bed.  “I’m just concerned about the excess travel.”

 

“What would you have me do?  There’s no one else.  Grandpa...I don’t want him to be alone.”

 

“That’s what I’m saying.  Both Katya and Pyotr have said you can stay as long as you need.”

 

Yura’s face crumpled.  “You don’t want me here?”  The tears broke through his exhaustion.

 

Yuuri gathered him into his arms.  “God, no...you know that’s not the case,” he soothed.  “I want you to feel comfortable in staying where you need to be.  Your position here is safe.  You are always a part of this family.”

 

Yuri sniffed, his heart heavy as he clung to the Japanese man.  “I know?  I just...I don’t want to let anyone down.”

 

“Sometimes...we must take care of ourselves.  What is best for you?”

 

“I don’t know what is best for me,” Yuri admitted in a whisper.  “What would you do?”

 

Yuuri held him close, petting his hair as the boy rested on his shoulder.  “We love you, Yura.  I hope you know this.”  He felt a nod into the crook of his neck.  “Most of my regrets in life have been when I put my career before people.”

 

“You think...I should withdraw?”

 

Yuuri shook his head.  “I think you should stay put and trust Pyotr with your training for now.  As much as I hate having you away…”

 

“I can’t rest there.  At Grandpa’s house.   There is too much...I hear noises, I check on him.  He grows quiet, I check on him.  I’m tied up in knots the whole time.”

 

“Maybe you should sleep at Pyotr and Katya’s,” Yuuri suggested.

 

“I tried...I just worry that Grandpa is all alone.  Even here, my thoughts don’t shut down.”  He pulled from Yuuri’s arms and curled up facing the wall.  Yuuri ran his hand up and down Yuri’s back.  “Why am I so mixed up?”

 

Yuuri stretched out behind him, wrapping an arm around him, brushing a kiss into his hair.  “Yura...you’re grieving.  Little by little learning how to let go.”

 

“Cancer sucks!”

 

“It does indeed, Yura!”  And the Japanese man found himself crying tears of compassion for the boy in his arms.  “It does indeed.”

 

* * *

  
  


Yura walked into the living room the next morning.  Victor stood with his bags packed and Yuri’s.  “I think we should finish out your training in Moscow.  I talked it over with my Yuuri and he agrees that is where we belong.  I’ve already called your grandfather and he says he has room for both of us.”

 

“You’ll have to sleep in my room.”  The little blonde eyed the older man cautiously, expecting him to back out.

 

“We’ve shared a room before,” Victor pointed out with a smirk.

 

Yuri rolled his eyes.  “In between your boyfriends.”

 

Victor chuckled warmly.  “Yes...and your fighting with Yakov.”

 

“He snores like an old man!”

 

“He  _ is  _ an old man!”

 

Yuri’s smirk was half-hearted.  Looking over at the bags, he argued equally half-hearted.  “You can’t leave Yuuri...and the kids…”

 

“Yuuri can handle the kids and Lidiya says she can pitch in.  It will be fine.  Now, let’s go to Moscow.  We have a 10 a.m. flight.”

 

Yuuri arrived after dropping off the kids and took Victor and Yura to the airport.  Victor and Yuuri refrained from their normal prolonged partings for Yura’s sake, not wanting to burden him with additional guilt.  And then the two were gone, on their way to Moscow where Victor got up with Yuri, made tea for him once he was settled, guiding his training times around Yuri’s rest until they left to join Yuri and the other skaters in Marseille, France.

 

* * *

 

 

**Grand Prix Final, Marseille, France, December 8-11, 2016**

 

The Grand Prix season counted down to six men:  Otabek Altin, Phichit Chulanont, Chris Giacometti, Yuuri Katsuki, Victor Nikiforov, and Yuri Plisetsky.  Yuuri surprised the lot when he ran to both husband and child, ignoring the former to embrace the latter.  “I’ve worried about you since you’ve left my side for Moscow...even under Victor’s care, I’ve worried about you.”

 

Yuri looked up, pale and sad, holding his eyes fiercely.  “I’m going to win this for my Grandpa.  It may be the last one he is able to watch.  I must win.”

 

Yuuri smoothed his blonde hair back behind his ear.  “I won’t make it easy for you.”

 

“Nor will I,” Victor echoed leaning around the boy to catch his eye.

 

He smiled, warmth filling his features even though it was tinged in sadness.  “I fully expect you both to make me fight for it.”  He leaned into the embrace of his...parents, his...brothers.  They never could define it but he knew he was loved, he had family.

 

* * *

  
  


During the Final, Yura dedicated his program to his grandfather and took the gold.  Yuuri finished at silver.  Victor closed in at third, Phichit finished fourth.  Otabek was fifth.  Chris slid to sixth.

 

“I think...much like yourself, Vitya, I’m just waiting for the Olympics to retire.  We...are becoming obsolete as the younger generation moves in to unseat us,” Chris pouted.

 

Victor chuckled.  “Perhaps...but that’s my husband and our Yura you are speaking of as well as your fiance.”

 

“Are you still planning to retire to Hasetsu?”

 

“It’s definitely in the plans.  And you?”

 

“We haven’t decided.  Grandmaman loves Phichit, though not his hamsters.  But Phichit wouldn’t mind being closer to his family.”

 

“You are welcome in Hasetsu, though you may want to wait until the new facilities are built.”

 

Chris grinned.  “I’ll keep that in mind.”

 

* * *

  
  


Yuri stood in his sponsored workout gear as he skated into position on the ice, the opening  [ notes  ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-2U0Ivkn2Ds) of his exhibition began to tap out on the piano as he slowly unzipped his jacket, his sorrow and grief in his movements.  He skated across the ice in slow movements, his jacket slowly dropping from his fingers.  He became a child in his movements, lost in his grief, lost in his direction, even as his shirt defied censors, the words  _ F*ck C@ncer! _ written across his chest.  The blonde moved into soft turns, his hands reaching out to his grandfather, knowing he’d have to let him go soon.  Learning to let go.  Learning to say goodbye.  Learning to lean on others.  Victor and Yuuri stood still, watching over the boy as he moved into his final pose, the light silhouetting him as he bent down to pick up his jacket and drag it behind him, his head bowed in grief, his emotion and pain exposed.  Nearby stood Otabek.  All three of them were ready to catch him as he came off the ice.

 

The arena remained quiet during the final notes then hands clapped, subdued in their actions.  Victor and Yuuri both skated out to meet him on the ice, wrapping him in their arms.  They guided him to the edge where Otabek was waiting, taking Yuri into his arms.  Mila watched from her position, waiting to skate, wiping a tear from her eyes.  So many had watched the teen struggle through the season and they all watched him take the gold, fighting for every point.  Yakov dropped a coat around his small body and the men led him to the locker room and away from prying eyes.  With shaking hands, he put through the call.

 

“Grandpa?  Did you see me?”

 

He heard the coughing followed by the words, “I wouldn’t miss it.  You make me proud.  Always.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...there are only two chapters left to this part. Why? Because I'm splitting off the next arc and letting it stand on its own. Can anyone guess the theme? If you don't know, you'll get a big hint...at the end of 65. 
> 
> So...posting schedule...64 goes up next...on Monday. 65 on Thursday. Then we'll have a little break from LL. Not long. I just need to tie up Semicolon and lay out the chapters for the next part. In the meantime, I'll drop in some oneshots along the way. Good, Fluffy OneShots! Because if you're reading GY, you need fluff. So lots of new stuff coming with the new year!


	64. Silver Bells

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The new family celebrate Vitya’s Birthday (because we know Russians celebrate Christmas in January.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This started out as a One Shot I was going to post Christmas Day. However, while working on the conclusion of this story, I saw that it fit here so I waited, made a couple of adjustments, and set it into the story. I hope you love this bit of fluff. :)
> 
> Thanks to my team, BluSkates and Magrathea, for helping me to get this ready.

* * *

  
  


Yuuri hated Nationals these days.  It always meant time apart from his beloved on Victor’s birthday.  Yuuri had Nationals from the 22-25 and Victor from the 23-27.  Due to the distance Yuuri had to travel, they decided the children would stay with Victor.  Of course Nina pouted until Yuuri came into her room and pulled her into his lap.  “I need you to do me a big favor.”

 

She looked up with large blue eyes, her curls sliding from her cheeks.  “What is it, Chichi?”

 

“Papa’s birthday is on the 25th of December...what many people celebrate as Christmas.  I need someone to make sure he has a happy birthday.  Do you think you can help me out?  Like a secret mission!”

 

Nina’s face lit up.  “I can do that!  What do you want me to do?”

 

“Okay, so here’s the plan…”

  
  


* * *

  
  
  


Victor allowed Andrei to share Yuri’s room when they arrived in Moscow.  With the younger boy to look after, Yuri would be less likely to get into trouble.  “I’m going to see my Grandpa after practice, though,” Yuri pressed.  “I wish he could see me skate.  At least one program.”

 

“We have tickets if he feels up to it,” Victor assured him.  “We can even bring him down with us.  Just let me or Yakov know.”

 

The younger skater nodded before taking the ice to practice.  Victor glanced over at Nina who watched with big eyes.  It was her first competition and she was antsy with excitement.  She  continued to bounce on her toes excitedly the first day as they watched the ice dancers.  Victor couldn’t help but smile at the multiple times she would cry out “Papa!  Look!”.  Finally, she collapsed into his arms with the declaration that she wanted to dance on the ice.

 

“I would love to see that,” Victor murmured as he carried her back to their hotel room.  She was exhausted and soon drifted off to sleep in his arms.  In the adjoining room, he heard evidence that the game system had been fired up.  He knocked softly to check on them and Yuri opened the door after some shuffling.  “I’m going to step out for a few minutes while Nina is napping.  Can we leave the door open while I’m gone?”

 

Yuri’s eyes widened as he looked past Victor to the tuckered out Nina curled up with her arm wrapped around her Makkachin.  “I’m surprised she’s not having a fit for Cocoa,” he muttered.

 

“Well, I had to explain that Chichi needed her because he’s going to be far away from everyone.”  He looked fondly towards her daughter.  “She still puckered and asked to bring Makkachin.  The old girl...she just doesn’t travel so well.”

 

Yuri’s lips thinned.  He knew how important Makkachin was to Victor.   _ He’s not going to handle it well when she passes _ .  “Madame Lidiya will take good care of her,” he said quietly.

 

Victor smiled sadly before shaking it off.  “I’m going to go mingle with some of the others.  I’ll be back soon but call or text if you need me.”

 

“Yeah yeah...I know the drill.  It’s not my first time to keep an eye on the pipsqueak and munchkin.”

 

Andrei’s voice came through the door.  “I heard that!”

 

“Whatever, pipsqueak!”

 

“Say what you will, Fairy...but get in here and pull your weight.”

 

Yuri shrugged Victor off.  “I’ve got a game to play.  See ya, old man!”

 

* * *

  
  


Victor met with Georgi, Dmitry, and Ivan downstairs.  Georgi talked excitedly about the girl he was meeting later.  “She’s the one!  I know it!”  Victor caught the eye rolls from the other men behind him.

 

“So, did you watch Yuuri’s skate?” Dmitry asked, turning the topic to more interesting matters.

 

Victor’s eyes brightened at the mention of his husband, “God, yes!  Did you see that move he slipped in there?  When did he even rehearse that spin?”

 

Ivan laughed.  “When you were teaching the puddleducks.  Lilia and Yakov helped him finetune it.”

 

“Damn!  He’s going to make me work for that Olympic medal.”  Victor smirked,  _ I had wondered why Yakov was so intent on my taking a basic skills class on. _

 

“You wouldn’t have it any other way,” Ivan pointed out.

 

Victor had to agree.  But he did enjoy a sneaky thought of asking Yakov to put Yuuri in charge of an edge class to even the playing field a little.  They enjoyed a few drinks then he went back to his room.  Nina was up and sitting between the boys when he entered.  She jumped up and ran into his arms.  “Papa!”  He scooped her up and sat on the bed behind the boys.  “Who’s winning?”

 

Yuri snorted.  “We are, of course.”

 

Victor sat and watched trying to follow the game before he retreated to his room to order room service for the family.  Nina was playing in a corner she had claimed with her toys and running back and forth into the boys’ room.  Victor pulled out his latest book.

 

At some point, he fell asleep waking up with one of Nina’s doll blankets stretched over him and Nina curled up beside him.  The dark had settled on them and even the boys were asleep.  He pulled out his phone and realized Andrei had snuck in and taken a picture of Victor and Nina curled up and tagged him on social media.  Yuuri commented, “My babies...never could stay up late.”

 

**Victor/ I miss you.**

 

**Yuuri/ I miss you, too.**

 

**Yuuri/ Hey, it’s after midnight there.  Happy birthday.**

 

**Victor/ I will be happy to retire and never spend another birthday apart from you.**

 

**Yuuri/ And what would we do if you were here?**

 

**Victor/ Have Nina sleep in the boys’ room while I fucked you into the mattress.**

 

**Yuuri/ Straight to the point, huh?**

 

**Victor/ When do I not want you?**

 

**Yuuri/ When I get home...we’ll make up for it.**

 

**{Picture of Yuuri made up with bedroom** [ **eyes** ](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/b8/2a/d9/b82ad99a79ceaac08e13232a090f5713.jpg) **makeup, and in a pinup** [ **pose** ](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/46/cb/df/46cbdf46e456a8274dc773c05021e5c1.jpg) **}**

 

**Victor/ I may need a glass of water.**

 

**Yuuri/  :D  Thirsty?**

 

**Victor/ Uh huh...who took the picture?**

 

**Yuuri/ Yuuko.  She helped with my makeup, too.**

 

**Victor/ I hope you took notes...because I want that look in person.**

 

**Yuuri/ It’s a promise.**

 

Victor slipped away from his daughter’s side to disappear into the bathroom and take a shower.  Yuuri had a way of making him need an abundance of cold water when he was away.  Finally settled, he went back to bed, sleep finding him quickly.

 

* * *

  
  


Victor skated on his birthday.  It was almost a guarantee.  He once told Yakov it would be nice to skate on his birthday for fun.  Yakov just snorted and said, “You have fun competing.”  It was true.  But lately, there were things that gave him greater joy.  He saw his kids sitting in the stands watching him and found his smile as he moved into position for his free skate.  He thought about Yuuri, his one true love.  He was skating his exhibition, making an appearance to visit with sponsors, then catching a late flight back to Russia.  He may even make it in time to catch Victor’s exhibition.  If Victor could keep his mind on his program.

 

[ Breath and Sound ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVltvZW9KOU) began its introductory notes.  Yuuri choreographed this for him and it showed in the elegant spins, in the intricate, sexy step sequences, in the push and pull with an invisible partner.  They thought to later turn this into a pairs exhibition.  He couldn’t wait.  He loved skating with his Yuuri, the way their bodies played into one another’s space.  Yuuri, his perfect complement, Victor could see him skating across the ice with him like a shadow.  And Victor chased after it, knowing the fight they went through to come together, knowing that he was the only perfect complement to Victor.

 

He finished to a rousing applause.  Yakov was ready with a barrage of criticisms which Victor would take with his usual good humor when he turned to see his daughter walking up, iPad in hand.  “From Chichi,” she said with her winsome smile.  As Victor took the device, he then saw the screen and it was Yuuri, his Yuuri.

 

“Hello, sweetheart.  Each of the kids have something for you and you need to follow their lead.”  Then the recording ended.  Victor turned to Nina who gave him an impish grin.  Tapping her finger on her lip, she winked.  “Later.”

 

He went through his ceremonies and soon was free to be with his kids.  Yura held silver but pouted as he side eyed the gold on Victor’s chest.  Their scores were close, though, and soon Victor would not be able to keep up with the Ice Tiger.

 

* * *

  
  


Back at their room, Nina led him inside and walked over to the closet.  It was then that he spotted a garment bag that hadn’t been there before.  “Chichi wanted me to pick out what you are wearing tonight for your birthday dinner.”

 

“A birthday dinner, huh?” he said teasingly.  He went over to the bag and his eyes widened at the oxblood  [ suit ](https://i.pinimg.com/736x/09/cf/09/09cf097f89da3f960fce2d6767843b1d--men-in-suits-men-wear.jpg) .  “Oh...this is...new.”  He pulled out the slim fitting suit and felt the quality.  Chichi had a hand in selecting this.  Yuuri had a good eye for lines but Chris would know quality.  It wouldn’t surprise him if the three of them hadn’t shopped for it over the summer.  It wasn’t formal enough for a banquet but perfect for a small dinner, perhaps a family dinner.  He lifted it off the hanger and held it up against his body.  His love of purples and pinks reflected in the fabric.

 

As he showered and dressed, he wondered about the other plans for the evening.  He came out to find that Nina had been changed into a long sleeved  [ dress ](https://www.dhresource.com/0x0s/f2-albu-g2-M00-37-67-rBVaG1Yq66WAayj5AAFUjBCyGBg438.jpg/wholesale-girl-causal-dress-girl-winter-velvet.jpg) in a muted mulberry velvet that flared out at the waist.  As she twirled around, he spotted the blue ribbon at the back.  One of the boys must have pulled her hair up into a curly ponytail with a matching dark blue ribbon.  Leggings repeated the blue and she finished it off with boots.

 

“My Nina is beautiful tonight!” he cooed, lifting her up.

 

She giggled and declared, “My Papa is beautiful!”

 

They walked into the next room to find the boys arguing.  “You can’t wear an animal print tie.  I may not be gay but even _ I _ know that’s hideous.”

 

“You know shit about fashion!”

 

As Victor eyed the boys dressed in black slacks and oxford shirts, he had to admit they cleaned up well...except for that  [ tie ](https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/61pVY5TG-cL._UX425_.jpg) .  He had to agree with Andrei on this one.   Andrei’s tie was more subdued with gray  [ tones ](https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/415boASzN5L._US500_.jpg) .  “But I do...that tie  _ is  _ hideous.”

 

Yuri hissed in protest.  Nina came around her father with her hands on her hips.  “That’s not the one Chichi picked out!”

 

“You are such a tattletale sometimes!”

 

“And you are a big kid!  You should know better!”

 

Annoyed pleading green eyes met Victor’s.  Victor looked between them all and asked, “What did Yuuri pick out?”  As much as he loved his husband, his taste in ties were not up to par with Victor’s.  Yuri brought out a green  [ tie  ](http://img.hottopic.com/is/image/HotTopic/259535_hi) and Victor frowned.  “That’s...not one I would pick out.  How about we compromise?  Let’s go with a basic black silk tie.  I have one in my room.”

 

Yuri gave his animal print tie a wistful look before agreeing.  “Yeah, I could do black.  As long as it’s skinny.”

 

Victor smiled to himself.  Reaching into the top drawer, he retrieved the  [ tie  ](https://smhttp-ssl-33667.nexcesscdn.net/manual/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/mens-black-tie.jpg) in question and walked back into the room.  “How’s this?”

 

Yuri agreed with a grunt and hurried to put it on.  “We have reservations.”

 

“How are we getting there?”

 

“Yuuri’s arranged for a car.  My job was to make sure we arrived on time.”

 

“Then let’s go,” Victor stated with a sweep of his hand.  The boys grabbed their black jackets and each grabbed their coats, keys, phones, and other things.  He felt a mittened hand slip into his and smiled down at his daughter who now had a kitty eared  [ hat ](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/8d/b5/01/8db5012163eca8b3bd2eddfcd9fdb7c2.jpg) on her head, although, knowing the girl as he did, she’d argue they were wolf ears.

 

The car was...a limo.  His eyes went wide.  “Yuuri arranged for this?”

 

“Yep,” the blonde kitten stated.  “Didn’t think the tightwad had it in him.”

 

_ That’s for sure.  _  The only extravagance he spied in Yuuri was for shoes and electronics.  Still, it was nice to be taken care of.

 

The restaurant was tiny but posh.  As the host led him to his chair, he asked about menus but was met with a grin and was told not to worry about it.  It was all taken care of.  It took a full moment for Victor to realize how well he recognized the guests in the room.  The Russian skate family, Yakov and Lilia, and then he spotted Phichit and Chris.  “What did he do?”

 

Andrei grinned.  “He said a man should never spend his birthday alone.”

 

If Victor was really paying attention, he would have noticed the dog lying at Phichit’s feet.  But the entire scene was overwhelming him and he already felt tears coming on.  “Shit!” Yuri stated under his breath.  Followed by Nina and Andrei both saying “language!”  “I didn’t sign up for waterworks,” Yuri protested.

 

Victor laughed through his tears.  “They are happy tears.  I just wish...my Yuuri could be here.”

 

“That’s where I come in,” Andrei announced.  He stood up and pulled out an extra jacket and the iPad made another appearance.  He draped the jacket over the back of the chair.  Lifting the iPad, he pressed play on a video of Yuuri.

 

“Hello, Vitya.  By now, you should be at the restaurant enjoying your surprise.  I know how you love surprises and to be surrounded by friends.  This is my gift to you.  Enjoy your evening.  We’ll be back together soon.  Oh...and happy birthday!”  Yuuri finished with a wink.  Handing the iPad back to Andrei, the younger man perched it on the chair and table, a picture of Yuuri showing in the background.

 

“This is just too much!  I can’t believe he did all this.”  He watched the waiters placing dishes before each of the guests.  He then noticed the music in the background was a compilation of performances Victor choreographed either for himself or others.  He heard  _ Yuuri on Ice _ come up on the list as a plate was set before him.  He blinked back tears, missing his husband so much.  “I wish he was here.”

 

He was enjoying the first course when the first strains of  [ Once Upon a December  ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5tJfum8uCnM) began.  A gloved hand touched his shoulder.  “May I have this dance?”

 

Victor nearly choked as he dropped his fork, turning tear-filled eyes to the man behind him.  “There is no one I’d rather dance with!” he squealed.  He noticed Yuuri signal the song to be restarted.  As he led Victor to the dance floor and into a waltz, Victor laughed as he heard the Russian family start softly with the lyrics, the rest picking it up as it continued.  Yuuri swung him around in an easy waltz, nothing fancy, just keeping his husband close.

 

As the dance finished, Victor found his voice once more.  “How are you here?”

 

“I had a flight set to leave as soon as I finished with my obligations.  Slept on the plane so I wouldn’t be completely exhausted.

 

“You’re here.  I can’t believe you’re here.”

 

Yuuri laughed warmly.  “It’s the only place I could be at this moment.”

 

Victor led Yuuri back to the table where Fake Yuuri was removed to make room for him.  His eyes lit up at the dish before him.  Victor leaned in and murmured, “I had wondered why they put a plate before your empty chair.”

 

“Not totally empty.  I had a placeholder.  I knew I’d be a little late getting here but the flight attendants were wonderful when I told them what I was doing.  I went into the airport bathroom and freshened up, clean suit, then grabbed a cab here.  I’m afraid my luggage is in the room where our coatchecks are located.”

 

Victor laughed warmly.  “I’m sure that’s not a problem.  You rented out the entire restaurant.”

 

Yuuri smiled indulgently.  “I married the king of grand gestures.  I’ll never catch up to you, but you deserve a few of your own.”

 

The evening was spent visiting with friends, dancing, and dining.  The establishment was gracious with the party.  As Yuuri scooped up a sleeping Nina curled up in a corner with Cocoa as a pillow, they left out to climb into the limo and return to their rooms.

 

As they approached their rooms, Yuri frowned.  “I don’t mind sharing a room with the munchkin, but please remember we’re next door.”

 

Andrei snorted.   _ Yes, their parents were loud in bed.  _  It was something he accepted with ease.  They shouldn’t withhold their love just because there were children in the picture.

 

After settling Nina, Cocoa climbing up beside her, the parents retreated through adjoining door.

 

“About that tie, Yuuri…”

 

The younger man’s eyes widened.  “He’s been so quiet lately...I was hoping to get some kind of reaction out of him.  I thought he’d fight me on it or at least call me on my bullshit.”

 

“The fight came later.  He was planning to wear animal print instead.  I stepped in with a black tie.”

 

Yuuri reached his arm around Victor’s neck.  “I’m going to shower and slip into something...more comfortable,” Yuuri breathed against Victor’s ear, his kisses working down Victor’s jawline.  Victor’s eyes widened as Yuuri retreated from his arms.  “Why don’t you…”  He reached up and loosened up Victor’s tie.  “...lose some of the layers.”  Turning on his heel, he picked up a small bag and disappeared into the bathroom.

 

Victor undressed, his eyes straying towards the door as he watched for Yuuri to emerge.  Stripped down to his underwear, he debated whether to leave them or lose them.  Looking in the mirror, he decided the cut suited him.  He frowned, knowing he wasn’t quite as manscaped as he’d like but still not too bad.

 

The bathroom door opened and Yuuri emerged...he had his makeup back in place from the pinup photo from the winged shadowed eyes to the pouty lipstick.  Victor subconsciously licked his lips.  He let his eyes slide down Yuuri’s body.  The black sheer lace robe hung open to reveal panties and  [ corset ](https://i.pinimg.com/736x/49/6c/38/496c38b1c3baa5ae286de70d6824eebb--robes-sexy-romantic-lace.jpg) , stockings and  [ heels ](https://i.pinimg.com/736x/78/fa/ff/78fafffcdb5636f8bff2f30bf516fac3--black-stilettos-stiletto-heels.jpg) .  “Fuck!” Victor stated under his breath.

 

“I was hoping you’d say that,” Yuuri teased.

 

“What’s got into you?”

 

“Well, I was talking to Phichit about your birthday and we started thinking about the Marilyn Monroe birthday song...one thing led to another and we decided to go pin-up.  Then I pulled Yuuko into the mix and we figured out the makeup together.”

 

“You look...amazing,” Victor declared breathless.

 

Yuuri smirked.  “Well, thank you.  That was the intention.   Now...for the rest of your birthday present.”  Yuuri took a seat and crossed his legs, dangling the heel of the second leg.

 

“Do I get to unwrap you?” Victor asked hopefully.

 

Yuuri’s warm throaty laugh answered him.  “Is that what you want?”

 

“God, yes...but...I want to fuck you with those heels on.”

 

“So everything but the stockings and heels?”

 

“Yes...I think...no, I know that’s what I want…”  Victor was on the floor before him kneeling, his hand playing with the sheer fabric over the silk stockings.

 

Yuuri leaned forward and winked.  “Whatever you want, baby,” he promised.

 

Victor grinned wolfishly.  “Oh, my darling...”  his arms slid around Yuuri as the other man’s legs parted to welcome him, dipping down to kiss the older man.  With an urging of hands sliding beneath the sheer robe and into the leg elastics of the panties to enjoy the pert ass, the younger man slid free of the chair and fell into his lap.  “That’s it, love,” he encouraged.  Yuuri’s lips nipped at his jaw, nibbled his ears, kissed his lips, licking into his mouth.

 

Victor’s hands tightened on his ass, lips dipping down to mouth Yuuri’s nipples through the silken fabric of the bustier.  He then leaned forward and grabbed at the zipper holding the corset closed, pulling it down with his teeth, Yuuri arching into the movement.  As the fabric fell away to reveal the constricted flesh, the corset leaving its mark behind where the boning bit into his skin.  Victor traced the indents, worshipping Yuuri’s body in the process.  He leaned forward to capture one nipple with his lips sucking it and hearing Yuuri’s gasping “Ah-aaah…”  He smirked against the other man’s skin, knowing Yuuri will not be able to keep quiet.

 

Victor reached down and unsnapped the garters tossing the corset aside.  The simple structure of the boycut panties held his partner inside but Victor could see the ridge of his desire beneath the fabric, the telltale dampness left in its wake.  Victor canted his hips up and Yuuri answered with a grinding motion of his own.  A hungry groan slipped from the older man’s lips.  Yuuri laughed breathily as he bent down to kiss along the column of Victor’s throat.  “My beautiful Vitya…”

 

Hands wound into the lacy fabric sliding it over Yuuri’s skin.  “You are the beautiful one, my Yuuri...always...beautiful…” he responded interrupted by small kisses.  Hands found the waist elastic of the panties and slid into them.  He moved his hands around the surface just beneath the band.  “Yuuri…”

 

Yuuri responded by pushing up against those hands, forcing Victor to remove the fabric as he stood, heels finding purchase on the floor beneath him as the panties slid down his thighs.  Victor stared up at the man before him, stockinged, heeled, the lace of the robe hanging loosely from his elbows.  Victor could be conquered by this man.  One flick of those heels, he would be laid low.  But that was never Yuuri.  He reached down and pulled Victor up into his arms.  The older man encircled him in his arms as he rose to his feet.  Lips found one another even as Yuuri’s hands pulled at Victor’s  [ Calvin Kleins ](https://slimages.macysassets.com/is/image/MCY/products/4/optimized/8202634_fpx.tif) .  They had to go.  Sliding them over his hips, freeing his cock, Yuuri’s hand smoothed over his length.  Victor hissed a vulgarity in Russian in response and Yuuri chuckled.  “Are you sure that’s what you want to happen?” he sassed back.

 

Victor groaned.  “I want...to…”  Too much stimulation from Yuuri’s touch stole his words.

 

“I believe your words were to  _ fuck me into the mattress _ ,” Yuuri tossed back his words from the text.  He leaned forward and whispered into Victor’s ear, “Bring it.”

 

Victor pulled his hand away turning Yuuri around to face the mattress.  Bending him over, he slid his fingers down Yuuri’s crevice and his eyes only widened a little to find that Yuuri had prepared for him.  It took very little stretching to take Yuuri the rest of the way.  Lining himself up, he held onto Yuuri’s hips as he pushed into him, a low deep moan slipping from him.  “You’ve been teasing me for days,” Victor muttered into his ear.

 

“You loved every minute of it,” Yuuri threw back over his shoulder.  “Now quit going easy on me.  I need you...deep...inside…” he demanded, his breaths breaking up his words.  Victor answered with slow, steady thrusts until he was fully seated.  “Fuck me hard, Vitya,” he demanded.  “I need you as much as you need me.”

 

Victor answered, “Brace yourself.”  He felt Yuuri’s hands brace himself even as his legs stiffened.  “Don’t lock your knees,” he added.

 

Yuuri laughed and Victor felt it all down his length.  “I dance on ice...I think I know how to hold myself up without passing out.”

 

Victor thrust into him and heard Yuuri’s groan in response.  “Give me more,” Victor murmured into Yuuri’s ear.

 

Victor soon had Yuuri’s answering thrusts back even as he moved forward, Victor’s guiding hand keeping their time...not that Yuuri ever had problem with rhythm.  As Victor continued to pound against Yuuri’s prostate though, the younger man started to feel himself come undone.  “Vityaa…” he breathed.  “I need…”

 

“Don’t worry, love...I’ve got you,” Victor reassured him, reaching around to stroke Yuuri’s length.  Yuuri was then torn in his focus, pushing back into Victor’s thrusts and thrusting forward into the cradle of Victor’s hand.  It didn’t take long with the double stimulation for Yuuri to come undone bringing Victor along with him.

 

Victor felt Yuuri’s knees buckle with his orgasm, holding him tight against him as he spent himself into Yuuri.  He lowered his partner onto their bed, listening to Yuuri’s soft sigh.  “Let me help you with these shoes,” Victor offered.  He ran his fingers along Yuuri’s thigh and down his calves, cradling the heel gently before slipping it free of Yuuri’s feet.  He repeated the process with the other leg.  Yuuri watched with half-lidded contentment.  Victor reached up to roll down the first stocking, placing a kiss on his thigh.  He then kissed the other thigh.  Yuuri, finally naked, sated, and resting into the pile of pillows watched his husband disappear into the bathroom.  Victor returned with a warm cloth and gently washed Yuuri down, leaving him clean and pulling a blanket over him to help him hold onto his warmth.  Victor picked up the shoes and set them in the closet before gathering Yuuri’s clothes.  He found a drawer to store them before sliding beneath the sheets next to Yuuri.

 

“Those could have waited,” Yuuri pointed out.

 

“True, but I pictured our daughter wandering into our room as we rush about getting ready tomorrow and then asking us about your corset.”

 

Yuuri chuckled in reply.  “I suppose.  Now hold me so we can go to sleep.”  Victor snuggled into the crook of his arm.

 

* * *

  
  
  


Victor and Yuuri found the other three downstairs the next morning in the hotel restaurant.  As they rounded the corner, they were greeted with a green eyed glare.  “I told you we were next door!  You two are the loudest!”

 

Andrei laughed into his mug.  “Maybe not the loudest, but they hold their own.”

 

Yuri glanced at the younger teen with a look of confusion and irritation.  Andrei just shrugged, an ambivalent smile on his face.

 

Nina bounced up and down.  “Papa!  Chichi!  Can I have blinis?”

 

Victor and Yuuri exchanged glances as they considered the indulgence.  “Of course,” Yuuri answered.

 

“Blinis would be perfect,” Victor answered in reply.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So one more chapter left...can't believe this is wrapping up. Really! I can't believe it. Because I had five more chapters plotted out. But those five chapters were going to rush me through the next year...
> 
> Also, the smut scene was not in the chapter originally...but then I felt it was missing.


	65. Chapter 65

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Euros, Four Continents, and Worlds...sort of.
> 
> The beginning is sad...just a warning. Have your tissues and fuzzy blankets ready. (((hugs)))
> 
> *Minor character death*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many thanks to all of you who have stayed with me through THREE parts of this story. This is the last chapter of Part Three. It's an emotional chapter but I hope I've left it on a positive note.
> 
> So much thanks to both BluSkates and Magrathea for beta reading and editing this story. They've been with me, helped me hash out plot points only to see me change them and hash them out again. (Some characters have a mind of their own.) Make sure you show your appreciation...they both have stories out there if you haven't checked them out.

* * *

 

Winter brought with it the bitter cold.  After Nationals, Yuri watched his grandfather take a turn for the worse.  Nikolai asked Victor to come see him while his grandson skated, needing a chance to talk with the man alone.

 

“I don’t know how much longer I have.  I need…”  His words were interrupted by coughing knocking loose some of the business going on in his chest.  Even as he coughed it up, he knew it didn’t matter.  There would always be more.  “I want to be sure my grandson is taken care of.”

 

“My Yuuri and I will always have a place for Yura to come home to,” Victor assured him.

 

“His mother...she can’t help her illness.  What if...he turns out like her?”

 

Victor gave the old man a reassuring smile.  “We’ll make sure he gets the best of care and the medications he needs to go forward in life if that is the case.  And we’ve already got his finances in order and well-managed.  He’s not going to struggle, sir.”

 

“I know you care for my grandson.  You always have.  It’s just that the state will see him as an adult.  And you and I both know he’s got a lot to figure out.”

 

“We will always be there for him.  Don’t worry.”

 

“Can you...I don’t have much but I need to make out a will.  Yuri set up life insurance policies to make sure Elena was taken care of when I pass on.  I know...Yuri will probably not come back here after I’m gone.  But I want him to have the decision as to what to do with my house and belongings.  He’s going to need help.  He won’t know how to get rid of the things he doesn’t want.”

 

“How about we put in a call to my attorneys.  They’ll draw up the paperwork and we’ll arrange for it to be notarized.  Okay?”

 

“Yes, I think that’s what I want.”

 

A phone call and an hour on the phone with his attorney, and the will was written.  They even found a place to send the papers electronically so that Nikolai could get them signed.  The outing was exhausting and when they returned, the elderly man found his chair and slept.  Yuri came home and looked from one to the other suspicion weighing heavily on him.

 

“What’s wrong?  Is everything alright?  Why are you here?”  Victor could hear the panic in the blonde’s voice.

 

“Shhh,” he murmured pulling the boy in his arms, his hand moving up and down his back.  Yuri was getting so tall these days.  Pretty soon he’ll be up to Victor’s height, maybe taller.  “Your grandfather just asked me to come by and tie up some loose ends for him.  Don’t panic.”

 

* * *

  
  


Yuri pulled from the European Championship and stayed with Pyotr and Katya when he needed a break.  The old man slept more and more as the days went on.  Victor and Yuuri had a feeling of what was to come as the Euros wrapped up and asked Lidiya if the kids could stay a little longer.  As their plane touched down in Moscow, they received notification from Pyotr to call him.

 

“Pyotr, what’s wrong?”

 

“Yuri went to check on his grandfather this morning...and the old man wouldn’t wake up.  He’s in the hospital but it’s just a matter of time.”

 

“Are you with Yuri?”

 

“We both are.  The baby’s presence seems to calm Yuri’s nerves and gives him someone else to focus on.  Come to the hospital.”

 

Victor relayed the information to Yuuri as they walked towards baggage claim.  Yuuri covered his mouth in worry.  “We need to go to Yura now.”

 

“Hush now, dearest.  Yura is being taken care of.  Let’s get our things to the hotel and set Cocoa up to rest.  Then we’ll go to the hospital.”

 

* * *

  
  


Two hours later, they walked into the hospital and up to ICU.  A rabbi stood nearby talking with Pyotr.  Yuri had spotted them coming off the elevator and rushed into their arms.  Both wrapped him up and held onto him as long as he needed.  Finally, he stepped back and wiped his tears.  His eyes were swollen; there had been a lot of tears.

 

“Th-they say he will probably not survive the night.  I can’t reach Mama.”

 

Victor studied the boy to decide what needed to be done.  “I’m going to leave Yuuri here with you and I’ll go look for her.  Claire will know her haunts.”

 

“Please.  I think...it’s only right that she has the chance to say goodbye.”

 

* * *

  
  


Victor found her in an ally, a faded poster from her days as a model was up and he watched her smooth out the edges.  “Elena,” he greeted softly not wanting to startle her.

 

She didn’t turn.  Her eyes dropped to the ground as she worked out her words.  “Is it Papa or Yura?”

 

“Papa,” Victor said softly.  “He’s in the hospital...they don’t expect him to survive the night.”

 

“I tried to go see him...a few times.  My steps wouldn’t take me any closer.  To see him...not strong...I couldn’t make myself go there.  I kept telling myself there would be more time.”

 

Victor struggled to keep his emotions from his voice, “There is no more time, Elena.  Do you want to go with me to the hospital or not?”

 

The woman slowly turned.  Her eyes were sunk in and he could tell she wasn’t taking care of herself.  “I should go...but they’ll make me stay.”  She studied her hands, red from the cold.  “I probably should stay but I need to be there for Yura.”

 

“Start by coming to the hospital.  Then we’ll see to your care after we have dealt with Nikolai’s final decisions.”

 

She nodded.  “There is a rabbi?  He’d want a rabbi to be there.”

 

“Yes, the rabbi is present.”

 

* * *

  
  


At the hospital, Yuri broke free of Yuuri’s arms and ran to his mother wrapping her up in his arms burying his head into her shoulder.  She was thinner than him, frail, dressed in a thin dress and sweater.  Victor had put his coat around her for the journey back to the hospital, she almost fell under the weight of it.  But she put herself to the side and for the moment allowed herself to be Mama.

 

By nightfall, Nikolai passed on.  His daughter holding one hand, his grandson holding the other.  He never woke up.  The funeral would be the next day at the synagogue.  Yakov and Lilia arrived with the kids, Yakov guiding them through unfamiliar  [ traditions ](https://reformjudaism.org/what-expect-jewish-funeral) .  They paid their respects and went to stand with Victor and Yuuri.

 

Elena was having a good day and she stayed close to Yuri, the boy often helping her with a firm hand.  After the graveside, the family and friends were at the old house.  Nikolai was well known in the community, and so people who didn’t come to the funeral came by to pay their respects.

 

Yuri moved close to his mother and asked her quietly, “Are you taking your medications?”

 

She smiled as if in a dream and told him, “You don’t need to worry about such things.”  Elena finally could not hold it together and she turned to Victor.  “You said you’d help me.”

 

He drove her to the hospital where she could get the help she needed.  Yuri held her hand the entire way.  “I’m sorry, baby, that I’m not the Mama you deserve,” she whispered during a more lucid moment.  But then she was gone, her thoughts taking her down an unknown darkened corridor.  They were able to get her settled and called Claire.  The shopkeeper told them not to worry.  She would watch over her.

 

* * *

  
  


Finally, Yuri and his family returned home.  He collapsed into his own bed and closed his eyes.  He thought sleep would find him but instead, with the pressure of holding strong lifted off of his shoulders, he broke down and cried bitterly.  He started when he felt a little body crawl over him and wrap him up in her little arms.  She kissed him over and over.  “It’s okay.  Tigers can cry just like wolves.”

 

He buried his head into her tiny body and cried heavily.  He didn’t notice at first that other hands were on him, soothing him.  He pulled away from her and found his family all next to his bed each of them with comforting hands on him.

 

The next few days passed in a fog.  Finally, Yuri asked the question that preyed upon his thoughts.  “Old Man, when you go to Japan to live...I think...if it’s okay, I’d like to move with you.”

 

“You’d leave Yakov?”

 

“I think that is where I need to be.  I know you and Yuuri can handle my coaching even with him training.”

 

“Of course; you always have a place with us.  The decision is yours.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

* * *

  
  


As the days moved forward, Yuuri knew that their oldest needed to have them nearby.  “I’m going to pull from 4CC,” he confided into Victor.

 

“Are you sure?”

 

“I need to be here...I’ll still compete in Worlds, but for now, I need to be here.”

 

“I’ll prepare the paperwork,” Victor murmured, brushing a kiss into his husband’s hairline.

 

* * *

  
  


The end of March came quickly through the fog as Yuri worked through his grief and the skaters worked towards the Worlds hoping to secure as many places as possible for their country in the coming Olympics.

 

All of the skaters who knew Yuri were protective of him, shielding him from the press.  Chris at one point stated with obvious disdain towards the press, “Let the boy grieve.  I’m amazed that he is still skating.  Let his performance speak for him.”

 

Phichit wrapped protective arms around him and pulled him back as Victor and Yuuri fielded press questions that quickly moved into family territory.  “No comment” seemed to get nowhere and Victor, in exasperation, replied coldly, “What happens in our home is family business.  Restrict your questions to skating and our careers or move on.”

 

Yuri retreated to Otabek that night.  “Beka, I’m lost and I just need to have my best friend by my side.”

 

Otabek opened his door and invited the blonde in.  As Yuri curled up on his side and stared at the wall still in the grip of his grief, Otabek sent a text to Victor.

 

**Otabek/ I’ve got Yura tonight.**

 

**Victor/ Call us if we are needed.**

 

The Kazakh skater stared at the response.  He’d been fully prepared to argue his case that Yura needed to stay with him.  The blonde, just barely seventeen, was in a fog.  Otabek climbed up on the bed next to him.  Yuri turned to wrap his arm around Otabek’s waist, burying himself into his side.

 

“I’m sorry I wasn’t able to come to the funeral,” he said quietly.

 

Yuri shrugged.  “It happened so fast, you couldn’t have gotten there in time.  Yakov and my siblings barely made it.”

 

Silence stretched between them.  Finally, Otabek asked, “What do you need, Yura?”

 

He climbed up Otabek and settled into his lap.  Leaning in, he kissed him digging fingers into his side.  Otabek returned the kiss meeting him in intensity until he heard a soft moan escape from the other man.  With firm hands, he set Yura back.  “I want you...I do.  There’s no one I want more.  But...not now.  Not while you’re hurting.”

 

Yuri buried himself into the crook of Otabek’s neck.  Otabek wrapped his arms around the blonde’s back, tightening his embrace as he felt the shaking of sobs go through his body.  He held onto him until the body stilled in his hold.  Finally, Yuri murmured, “You’d think I’d be finished with this.  All I do is cry lately.”

 

“Maybe...after all of this is over...you can join me in Almaty.”

 

Yuri sniffed and looked up at him in surprise.  “For how long?”

 

“As long as you can get away.  I have ice, but I know you have to train with your coaches.”

 

He nodded swallowing a sob.  “I’ll talk to the old man and Katsudon.  I’ve been gone so much.”

 

“The offer is open, Yuri.  My home is yours.”

 

* * *

  
  


Victor stood solidly in first at the end of his short.  Both Yu(u)ris holding their own in second and third.  As the younger Yuri sat with his guardians for dinner that evening, he broached the subject of the next few months.

 

“I think...I need some time off.  I need to get my head together away from everything.”

 

“Do you want to go to Hasetsu?” Yuuri suggested knowing his family would take care of him.

 

Yuri shook his head.  “I want to go to Almaty with Beka.”  The adults studied him and he launched into his words before they could argue with him.  “We both know that I am considered an adult by the state...I’m allowed to make this decision.  I just...I would rather go with your approval.”  He studied them and as they remained quiet, waiting, he added, “You know Bekka will watch out for me and take care of me.  We’ve been together since...well, since I was fifteen.  He has always...said we should wait.  Out of respect for you both, but also out of respect for me.  I’m old enough to decide now.”

 

Victor finally spoke.  “Eighteen is an arbitrary number, I chose it because it gave you time.  I knew at some point it wouldn’t matter.  But it gave you the backing you needed to take time and decide when you were ready.  I was sixteen when I made that decision...it was rash and part of me regretted it.”

 

“I waited,” Yuuri countered quietly.  “I only wanted to know one man.  Perhaps that’s old fashioned...but I knew my heart couldn’t take the battering of multiple relationships.  I mean, they call me the skater with a glass heart for a reason.  And yes, I know they call me that.”

 

“The point is that we knew we can’t decide for you when you are ready.  You  _ are  _ old enough.  Just...make sure you aren’t trying to fill your grief with something physical.  It never works.”

 

Yuri looked from one another.  “You’ll let me?”

 

Victor smirked.  “As you pointed out, we can’t exactly stop you.  We do need to decide when you’ll come back for training.  And Nina returns to Switzerland.  We are going to Hasetsu.  All of these things need to be decided.  I mean, it is an Olympic year.  And I know you want that gold as bad as the rest of us.”

 

Yuri breathed out his desire and relief in the words, “I do want it.”

 

“Okay, so we’ll sit down with Beka, the four of us...and decide what’s the best timeframe.”

 

“And just because you go, doesn’t mean you can’t change your mind,” Yuuri stated softly, his hand on Yuri’s.  “I know Otabek will give you the time you need.  Don’t rush if you start having second thoughts.”

 

“I know...he’s willing to wait.  If he thinks my motivation is wrong, he’ll pull back.”  Yuri knew a telling blush started to stain his cheeks.  Both guardians observed him with knowing eyes but said nothing.  “I just...I’ve always had to take care of myself.  But...I’m glad I have so many that want to take care of me now.  It’s just...sometimes it’s too much.  And I need to step back more than anything.  Okay?”

 

“Of course,” Yuuri murmured.  “You will come home when you’re ready.”

 

* * *

  
  


Yuuri entered the arena, his free skate  [ Saturn ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dzNvk80XY9s) promising to embrace the beauty of his movements, applause greeting him as he skated to Victor at the boards.  “Be beautiful, my Yuuri.  Show us your beauty.”

 

“Vitya…”

 

“I know...I’m already second.  I don’t care.  I want to see you where you belong.  Which is at the top of that pedestal.  But more than that, I want to see the beauty you can bring from this program.  Show me.  Let me see what you have been working on.”

 

Yuuri’s hand went up to his cheek as he leaned in to brush their lips together.

 

He settled into the center of the ice, turning to rest his eyes on Yuri, meeting green eyes, he whispered, “This skate is for you.”

 

He waltzed through the ethereal movements of the violin traversing through a beautiful memory of past loved ones.  His skates arched off the ice in a triple lutz as he continued to slide through memory, through sadness, until he reached the core of the love that held two souls together even past death.  He wrapped himself up in the courage taught by his own grandfather, long gone but still touching on his thoughts.  He recalled his grandmother grabbing hold of the thoughts of her voice, the promise of her wisdom.  He danced around the memory of Vicchan as he chased him across the beach and into the field of wildflowers behind the inn.  He gave himself over to the memory and the way the people of his past sculpted him into who he became, finishing in a pose that signified a beautiful ice sculpture because even his own presence in the world was finite and brief.

 

The applause that greeted him on the ice was nothing in comparison to the applause that followed him off the ice.  He nailed his jumps, his sequences and spins were at a four.  And he knew before the score was announced, before Victor enfolded him in his arms, that he had won.  As the scores confirmed it, he buried himself into Victor’s chest, tears overwhelming him.  A second hand slid up his back and he turned to find the teary Yuri.

 

“That was a program worthy of you, Katsudon,” he murmured.

 

Yuuri pushed away his tears, and sputtered out, “I’ve been refining it since the Grand Prix.  Then, it clicked...because something had always felt off before.  But then the pieces fell into place.”

 

“I know what you mean,” murmured the blonde.  “Like our family.”

 

Yuuri, overcome with emotion, grasped the blonde and kissed his cheek.  The three of them were in their own world ignoring the cameras that followed their movements.  The medal ceremony was being prepared.  Then they were guided out on the ice, Gold to Katsuki Yuuri, Silver to Yuri Plisetsky, and Bronze to Victor Nikiforov.

 

* * *

  
  


“Mr. Nikiforov, this is your second bronze in a major event.”

 

Victor chuckled at the reporter’s dig.  “I love skating and creating beautiful programs with such talented skaters.  Besides, it's not my second bronze...only my second bronze at recent major events.”

 

“Do you expect to take gold in the coming Olympics?”

 

“Of course I expect to take gold,” Victor laughed.  “Every skater walks out with that expectation.”

 

“After the Olympics, do you plan to retire, Mr. Nikiforov?”

 

Victor smiled noncommitally.  Yes, he planned to retire.  But he wasn’t finished yet.  “ [ You haven’t seen the last of me ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LD7UtPtyuV8) ,” he promised with a wink.  Turning away from the press dramatically on his heel, he wrapped an arm around Chris and Yuuri, Phichit slipping under Chris’s arm, and Yuri under Yuuri’s free arm.  “Come on, Bitches, let’s show them how an Olympic year is done.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO...this isn't the end. Because Lifeline is my own personal soap opera.
> 
> Any guesses to the next part? Hint: It's NOT the five years in the future. That hasn't been scrapped. It's just been moved to part five. Theoretically...this one will be short(er). Not 65 chapters. But I've said that before. Who remembers when I declared part one would wrap up at 18 chapters?
> 
> If you still haven't figured it out...read Victor's last words. ;) 
> 
> See you in the next part! Lifeline: Road to Pyeongchang

**Author's Note:**

> So excited! Lifeline is now being translated into Portuguese. So look for [Lifeline: Detroit](http://archiveofourown.org/works/11638599/chapters/26177646) now in Portuguese thanks to Dandanyami!


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